Finding What You Weren't Looking For
by JackieStarSister
Summary: Life is full of searches. But are the things we find worth more than the things we seek? An alteration of Book 1 events has ripples throughout the remainder of the war. Zutara and Taang romance of realistic proportions. "Don't tell me the ways we're indebted to each other. Relationships aren't about owing; they're about giving, without any thought for yourself." Art by Kuro-Akumako
1. Preface

"The Song of Wandering Aengus"  
>William Butler Yeats<p>

I went out to the hazel wood,  
>Because a fire was in my head,<br>And cut and peeled a hazel wand,  
>And hooked a berry to a thread;<br>And when white moths were on the wing,  
>And moth-like stars were flickering out,<br>I dropped the berry in a stream  
>And caught a little silver trout.<p>

When I had laid it on the floor  
>I went to blow the fire aflame,<br>But something rustled on the floor,  
>And some one called me by my name:<br>It had become a glimmering girl  
>With apple blossom in her hair<br>Who called me by my name and ran  
>And faded through the brightening air.<p>

Though I am old with wandering  
>Through hollow lands and hilly lands,<br>I will find out where she has gone,  
>And kiss her lips and take her hands;<br>And walk among long dappled grass,  
>And pluck till time and times are done<br>The silver apples of the moon,  
>The golden apples of the sun.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I love books that have a poem or quotation at the beginning of each chapter. So when I read novels and poems, I bookmark pages with good quotes; and then I start each chapter of my writing with a relevant quote. For this fanfic, I tried to include quotes that applied to the situation in the story, and/or mentioned the elements, especially water and fire (remember that wind is air). Sometimes I also put a quote, or an entire poem, at the very beginning of a story. I chose to open with the poem "The Song of the Wandering Aengus" because 1) it mentions fire; 2) it's about looking for something, making an allusion to the title of this story; and 3) it kind of fits with the situation with Zuko wandering the Earth Kingdom looking for Katara as well as Aang.


	2. The Waterbending Scroll

"The Waterbending Scroll"

From the four corners of the earth,  
>from corners lashed in wind<br>and bitten with rain and fire,  
>from places where the winds begin<br>and fogs are born with mist children,  
>tall men from tall rocky slopes came<br>and sleepy men from sleepy valleys,  
>their women tall, their women sleepy,<br>with bundles and belongings,  
>with little ones babbling, "Where to now?<br>what next?"

~ Carl Sandburg, "The People, Yes"

* * *

><p>"I've checked all the shops on this pier," Iroh told Zuko. "Not a lotus tile in the entire marketplace."<p>

"It's good to know this trip was a complete waste of time for everyone," Zuko said with biting sarcasm.

"Quite the contrary," Iroh reasoned. "I always say: the only thing better than finding something you are looking for, is finding something you _weren't_ looking for, at a great bargain." He gestured happily to their crewmembers, who were walking back to the ship with their arms full of Iroh's purchases.

Zuko looked disdainfully at the items they were carrying. "You bought a Tsungi horn?" he asked Iroh incredulously.

"For music night on the ship. Now, if only we had some woodwinds …" Iroh murmured thoughtfully.

Zuko scowled and shook his head in disbelief. How could his uncle waste so much time and effort over something as trivial as the missing piece of a board game? They had so much more important things to be concerned about! Sometimes it seemed that Iroh had simply resigned himself to his and Zuko's fate, wandering the Four Nations on a seemingly impossible quest.

But Zuko was far from giving up. It was Iroh who had given him a knife engraved with the advice, "Never give up without a fight." Zuko had been fighting for over two years; he wasn't about to give up now, when he was so close to succeeding. Now he knew the Avatar was alive and active; he was leaving a trail for Zuko to follow, and they had already had some encounters.

"That place looks promising!" Iroh pointed to a ship docked nearby. Zuko reluctantly followed him over the gangplank and onto the ship.

Iroh oohed and ahhed over the curios lining the shelves of the ship's interior. Zuko hung back, not wanting to encourage Iroh's browsing, but knowing that efforts to discourage him would be futile. Occasionally Iroh could be just as stubborn as his nephew, especially about things that mattered to him – like music, tea, the Spirit World, and Pai-Sho.

In the back of the cabin, a pirate barker leaned on the counter and talked to the captain. "We lost the Water Tribe girl and the little bald monk she was traveling with."

Zuko's ears perked up. Water Tribe girl? Little bald monk? It had to be the Avatar and his waterbender friend!

"This monk," Zuko said, turning to look at the sailors. "Did he have an arrow on his head?"

* * *

><p>Katara couldn't sleep. She was too emotionally restless. She felt jealous of Aang's effortless excellence at waterbending, annoyed with his wisdom, guilty that she had lashed out angrily at him. And yet … there was a selfish part of her that still wanted to use the scroll.<p>

She rolled over in her sleeping bag, turning to look at the waterbending scroll poking out of Sokka's shoulder bag. The tempting scroll seemed to be mocking her, either for her ineptitude, or for her assertion that she no longer wanted it.

Suppose she used it now, while Aang and Sokka were asleep? Maybe it would be easier to do the techniques if she didn't have an audience. Plus, in the past she had noticed that her bending was stronger at night.

As quietly as she could, Katara crawled out of her sleeping bag, retrieved the scroll from Sokka's shoulder bag, and tiptoed through the forest until she came to the riverbank. The waxing moon was a silver crescent in the indigo-blue sky, providing enough light to make out the river and trees.

Katara inhaled deeply, listening to the sound of the rushing water, focusing on its energy and constant change. _Water is the element of change,_ she heard her mother's voice echo from a long-ago conversation. _The people of the Water Tribe are adaptable and capable. We have a deep sense of community and love that holds us together through anything._

The memory made Katara smile wryly. When her mother, Kya, had explained to her the nature of water, she'd had no idea how much Katara's life would change in the future. Kya died; Katara and Sokka's father, Hakoda, left to fight in the war; the Avatar returned; Katara and Sokka left their village in the South Pole; and Katara, Sokka, and Aang had already had their share of new adventures and experiences while traveling.

If Katara's life could change so much in six years, how much would it change in the near future? Really, all she could see ahead of her was more change: she would continue traveling with Aang and Sokka; she was going to learn waterbending; if things went well, if Aang mastered all the elements and defeated the Fire Lord, then the war would end. That would be the most mind-blowing change of all.

Another one of Kya's proverbs rang in Katara's head: _The only constant is change._ This was certainly true of water: the river was always changing; the ocean constantly ebbed and flowed, pushed and pulled. Even the moon, from which waterbenders drew power, constantly changed size and position in the sky.

Katara unrolled the waterbending scroll and looked over the techniques. The diagrams made it look easy enough; applying the moves was the tricky part.

Katara set the map down on a tree stump, looked out at the river, and slowly raised her arms. A stream of water started to rise up from the river, but then quivered and refused to go higher. Katara tensed, trying to make the water whip. "Come on water! Work with me!" She growled in frustration, throwing the water down with a splash.

She tried to calm herself. "Come on, Katara, shift your weight through the stances." She tried again and again, grunting and scowling in frustration, but she couldn't get it right.

Suddenly there was a crunching sound, coming from around the river bend to her right. Katara dropped her water, startled, and looked around. She cautiously knelt down and looked through the bushes that cut this riverbank off from further upstream. She gasped at what she saw, feeling a chill dance up her spine.

It was the pirates' wooden boat, accompanied by a metal Fire Nation-style cutter.

Katara backed away from the hedge; her mind was swimming in a flash flood of information. How had they found her? What were the pirates doing with the Fire Nation soldiers? Of course, both groups were enemies of Katara, Aang and Sokka, so maybe it made sense that they would team up.

Katara bumped into something behind her. She whirled around and saw a big, bare-chested man whom she recognized as one of the pirates that she had encountered the day before, when she stole the waterbending scroll.

The pirate lunged and grabbed her. Katara shrieked. "No! Let go of me!" She swiftly bended a stream of water from the river and splashed the pirate in the face. He let go of her for a moment, sputtering.

Katara ran, looking over her shoulder at the pirate; then she looked forward – and came face-to-face with Prince Zuko. Katara stopped short and tried to turn, but Zuko grabbed her wrists. His face was hard; his eyes were narrowed at her. "I'll save you from the pirates," he said in a low, intense voice. Katara could feel his breath on her face.

Zuko tried to gauge her reaction; the waterbender's expression was wary, somewhat fearful, but she didn't look as scared or desperate as she'd been with the pirate. She looked dismayed when more pirates and firebenders came around the bend, apparently following Zuko's lead.

"There she is!" the pirate barker said, pointing his sword at Katara.

"Take it easy," Zuko said sharply. "She's my prisoner, not yours."

Zuko's words rang in Katara's ears. _"I'll save you from the pirates."_ What did that mean?_ "She's my prisoner, not yours."_

Of course, if only the pirates had found her, and not Zuko and his crew … they probably wouldn't have hesitated to hurt her – or violate her. Katara shuddered and tried to push the thought away. If Zuko meant what he said, then she didn't have to worry about the pirates that way – but could she trust his word? Sokka would say not. Still, Katara felt safer with the banished prince than with the lawless pirates.

Zuko pushed Katara over to a solitary tree set apart from the forest. She tried again to break away, but Zuko was stronger than her. He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her against the tree trunk, while one of the pirates forced her arms behind her around the trunk and tied her hands. It wasn't a very comfortable position, but that was the least of her worries.

Zuko stepped back to look at Katara. He got right to the point. "Tell me where he is, and I won't hurt you or your brother."

"Go jump in the river!" Katara snapped.

Zuko looked away for a moment. She was feisty, he thought. If she was scared, she didn't show it. His grudging respect for the waterbender increased.

When Zuko spoke again, his tone was reasonable, almost plaintive. "Try to understand," he started, stepping toward the tree. He leaned in closer to Katara, who jerked her head away from him. "I need to capture him to restore something I've lost." He circled the tree. "My honor."

Zuko leaned over so he was speaking into Katara's ear. "Perhaps in exchange I can restore something you've lost."

For a moment Katara thought he was trying to hug her and the tree trunk from behind; then she realized he was holding something up to her neck. Katara's mouth dropped open when she saw what it was. "My mother's necklace!" She had thought that she'd lost it for good! She had tried to hide how sad she was – it was only a necklace, and they had more important things to worry about, like finding a waterbending teacher. Still, it was an heirloom, and it was a connection to Kya; it had given her strength when she needed it; losing it had been an emotional blow.

Zuko dropped his arms and walked away, smirking a little, dangling the choker teasingly. Katara's surprise and relief quickly turned to anger. How dare this boy take away the last connection she had with her mother? How dare he try to bribe her with her own necklace? "How did you get that?" she demanded.

"I didn't steal it if that's what you're wondering." He was mocking her; that comment was a direct reference to the fact that Katara had stolen the waterbending scroll. Zuko stood by the pirates and crossed his arms, looking back at Katara. "Tell me where he is."

"No!" Katara said defiantly. She was stubborn, too, and loyal, Zuko noted.

"Enough of this necklace garbage," the pirate captain broke in, stepping forward. "You promised the scroll!"

Zuko took the scroll out of his belt. He had picked it up when Katara spied their vessels through the bushes. Now, he smiled craftily and held one flaming hand underneath the coveted scroll. "I wonder how much this is worth?" he mused sarcastically.

"No!" the pirates exclaimed desperately, imagining a fortune going up in flames – literally.

"A lot, apparently." Zuko smiled smugly. He almost enjoyed having leverage, over the waterbender and the pirates alike. "Now you help me get what I want. You'll get this back and everyone goes home happy. Search the woods for the boy and meet back here."

"Fine." The pirates turned and headed into the forest, leaving Katara, Zuko, Iroh, and the firebenders by the river.

Now Katara was starting to worry. Aang and Sokka were probably still asleep, unaware and vulnerable. If the pirates captured them … what then? Zuko would take Aang to the Fire Nation; he might leave Sokka and Katara to fend for themselves in the Earth Kingdom, so far from both their home at the South Pole and the waterbenders at the North Pole. Or maybe they would be taken as prisoners of war – after all, they were a waterbender and a warrior. Fear was building up insider Katara like layers of frost.

She heard the old man, one of the few firebeners who wasn't wearing a mask, speaking quietly to Zuko. "Threatening their prize is a risky move, Prince Zuko."

"I didn't get my prize yet! They haven't filled their part of the bargain."

Katara couldn't decide if it was amusing or disgusting, hearing Zuko complain about Aang like he was a prize to be won at a festival game.

"Pirates are dangerous people to trifle with," Iroh warned. "They may turn on you if circumstances change. And they'll be more likely to do so if you show you're willing to turn on them that way."

"It's almost done, Uncle. I'm not worried this time."

There was a brief silence. Zuko seemed to have won the argument, if that's what it was; but then Iroh spoke again. "If this turns into a fight, you'll win by using your wits, not your wrath."

Zuko didn't respond.

"Brains over brawn, huh?" The two firebenders looked to Katara, surprised that she had spoken. She shrugged one shoulder, half-smiling. "That's my brother's attitude. At least he likes to think it is."

Zuko glared, trying to shut her up, but she had nothing more to say. A slightly awkward silence lingered while Iroh and Zuko watched over the prisoner. The masked firebender soldiers stood off to the side, wordlessly waiting for orders. Finally Iroh couldn't bear the quiet animosity any longer, and decided to take a stab at conversation. "So … who's the lucky man?" he asked Katara casually.

Zuko and Katara stared at him. "Huh?"

Iroh gestured to his neck. "That betrothal necklace. You're getting married, right?"

Zuko looked sideways at the girl. She seemed a bit young to be engaged.

Katara blushed. "Oh, no; I – I don't think I'm ready for that yet," she confessed, smiling nervously. She explained, "My grandmother gave my mother that necklace, and she passed on to me."

"Oh," Iroh said, looking a little embarrassed. "My mistake."

Zuko narrowed his eyes at Katara. "Was it really your mother's? Or did you steal it like you stole the waterbending scroll?"

She glared at him. "First, yes, it really was my mother's. Second, those pirates stole the scroll first!" Zuko frowned as her voice rose in indignation. "I just gave them a dose of their own medicine. And third, they were just going to sell it to an Earth Kingdom noble; Aang and I would have made better use of it, since we're actually waterbenders." She smirked at Zuko as another thought occurred to her. "And given everything you've done, you're not really in a position to criticize my actions."

Anger flared up in Zuko's chest; he could feel fire itching to emit from his fingertips. It wasn't just the insult that angered him; it was the fact that it was true. Iroh shot him a warning glance, and Zuko tried to calm himself. Why should he care what this girl thought of him? Her opinion didn't matter to him. She was just a peasant who couldn't master her own element. Anyway, she'd only seen him at his worst, during his attempts to capture the Avatar; she had no idea what he was really like.


	3. Hostage

Illustration: ".capture" by darkelf19 on DeviantArt

"Hostage"

But then, through the darkness, fire erupted: crimson and gold, a ring of fire that surrounded the rock so that the Inferi holding Harry so tightly stumbled and faltered; they did not dare pass through the flames to get to the water. ~ J.K. Rowling, _Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince_

* * *

><p>It didn't take long for the pirates to find Sokka and Aang. They returned to the riverbank as the sun was creeping up over the horizon. Sokka and Aang saw Katara tied to the tree, and she could see the grim understanding in their eyes.<p>

"Nice work," Zuko told the pirates, eyeing the prisoners.

Katara spoke up. She wanted to apologize while she still had the chance. "Aang, this is all my fault," she said shamefully.

"No, Katara, it isn't," he assured her.

"Yeah, it kind of is," Iroh said frankly. Katara raised an eyebrow at him. She had thought that he wasn't so bad.

Zuko faced the pirates, holding up the waterbending scroll. "Give me the boy."

"You give us the scroll," the pirate captain snarled.

Sokka spoke up, sounding curious and incredulous. "You're really going to trade the Avatar for some stupid piece of parchment?"

"Don't listen to him," Zuko said through clenched teeth. "He's trying to turn us against each other."

But the pirate captain looked askance at Aang. "Your friend is the Avatar?"

"Sure is," Sokka chimed in, "and I bet he'll fetch a lot more on the black market than that fancy scroll."

"Shut your mouth, you Water Tribe peasant!" Zuko snapped.

"Yeah, Sokka, you really should shut your mouth," Aang said out of the corner of his mouth, looking concerned.

"I'm just saying, it's bad business sense," Sokka said sweetly, shrugging and looking at the pirates with big, innocent eyes. "Just imagine how much the Fire Lord would pay for the Avatar. You guys would be set for life!" Sokka was really buttering up the pirates, who looked enticed, greedy, and eager at his suggestion.

"Keep the scroll," the pirate captain told Zuko. "We can buy a hundred with the reward we'll get for the kid." The pirates started to lead Sokka and Aang away.

Zuko's face was stormy. "You'll regret breaking a deal with me." Zuko and the firebender guards assumed fighting stances and unleashed a torrent of flames toward the pirates, who jumped out of the way with cries of fear and pain. Zuko and his men bore down on Aang and Sokka, but four pirates jumped in to defend their prisoners. The pirates dropped smoke bombs on the ground, creating a thick fog that engulfed the pirates, the firebenders, and the two captives.

Katara had been left alone, still bound to the tree, unable to intervene in the battle. Over the sounds of the melee she heard a purr that she recognized as Momo's. Katara tried to turn her head to look behind her; then she felt pressure on the rope that bound her hands. After a moment she felt the rope break, and she glanced over her shoulder to see Momo clinging to the tree bark.

"Thanks Momo," Katara said gratefully, rubbing her sore wrists. "I owe you a bushel of apples." She jogged around the crowd of combating pirates and firebenders, heading for the river.

Coughing and sputtering and cursing, Zuko stumbled out of the fog cloud on the side facing the river. How had things gotten so beyond his control? That conniving Water Tribe boy …

He spotted Katara, now free, trying to push the pirates' boat off the beach. A clever idea, but her efforts appeared futile; there was no way she could move the large vessel.

Zuko looked at the chaotic dust cloud behind him, and then back at the waterbender. An idea had been forming in his head all night, and now it seemed the most logical thing to do. Maybe there was still a way for him to win this fight, or at least gain something from it. A better lead, something more valuable than a necklace—something worth saving. Like a friend or ally. He may not have another such chance.

Zuko came up behind Katara and grabbed her, pinning her arms down and pressing her against his chest. "Oh no you don't," Zuko breathed in her ear. Katara stiffened.

Zuko yelled over his shoulder to his men. "Firebenders, fall back!" He pulled Katara onto the cutter and led her to Iroh. "What are you doing?" Iroh asked.

"The pirates have turned on us!" Zuko exclaimed. "We don't have time for a three-way battle. The Avatar can escape on his own – and then _he_ will come find us." He gestured to Katara.

Iroh frowned. "Are you sure this is wise, Prince Zuko?"

"Do you have a better idea?" Zuko snapped.

* * *

><p>Hearing Zuko's order, the firebenders left the battle and retreated back to the river. Now there were only the pirates trying to get a hold of Aang.<p>

Somehow Sokka found Aang in the midst of all the chaos. "Why'd Zuko tell the firebenders to leave?" Aang asked.

"I don't know," Sokka answered.

"It's not like Zuko to walk away from a fight."

Sokka looked around. "Where's Katara? She's not tied to that tree anymore."

"Katara!" Aang shouted.

Sokka and Aang heard Zuko's voice coming from the direction of the riverbank. "She's over here!"

Sokka and Aang locked eyes for a split second, a wordless understanding passing between them. Then they both took off, dodging sword blows as they fought their way through the dust cloud to the river. Somehow they made it through to the other side. They saw Katara and the firebenders on Prince Zuko's cutter. Zuko was holding Katara's arm, talking – it looked like arguing – with Iroh.

Sokka yelled at Zuko. "Get your filthy firebender hands off my sister!"

"_Katara_!" Aang called out.

"You want her? Come and get her!" Zuko shot back.

"No, take me instead!" Sokka yelled.

"No thanks, I've already got a hostage."

"What, I'm not important enough to kidnap?" Sokka said sarcastically, sounding almost hysterical.

"You're not a waterbender. All waterbenders are supposed to be in prison," Zuko reminded him.

Zuko saw fear flicker on Katara's face, melting her mask of defiance. Now she was worried. Would they send her to a Fire Nation prison for waterbenders?

"No, don't!" Aang yelled desperately. There was no way he was going to let Zuko imprison Katara. "I'll come, you can take me prisoner –"

"NO!" Katara cried, breaking away from Zuko for a moment, only to have two firebenders step forward to restrain her. "Aang, I'm just one person. You can't sacrifice the world to save me."

"I promised Dad I'd protect you!" Sokka's voice was choked.

"It's more important that we protect Aang," Katara insisted, willing her voice not to tremble.

Zuko looked at her with something like amazement. Such loyalty and selflessness. She was either exceedingly brave, or foolish.

Just then a pirate emerged from the receding dust cloud and spotted Aang and Sokka. "There he is!" he yelled, pointing his sword at the Avatar. The boys gasped and started running for the woods.

"_We'll be back for you Katara!_" Aang yelled over his shoulder.

"_We promise!_" Sokka hollered.

* * *

><p>Zuko directed the cutter up the river, back to the pier where his ship was docked. As they approached the pier, Katara knew this was her best chance to escape, while the pirates weren't around, before the group boarded Zuko's ship. She was thinking about jumping into the water, when she felt a hand grip her shoulder. "Don't even think about it," Zuko hissed.<p>

She whirled around. "Don't touch me!"

Zuko drew his hand back, scowling. "I won't if you'll come quietly. And then maybe I won't keep you locked in the brig."

Katara scowled back. She turned to look back at the looming metal Fire Navy ship that was Zuko's home. The prow opened up into a ramp, and the ship reeled the cutter vessel on board.

Now the fear was hitting Katara. The prow closed with a metallic clang that had an ominous finality about it, leaving her, Zuko, Iroh, and the other firebenders in the dim red light of the cargo bay.

Iroh turned to Zuko. "May I have a word with you and Katara?"

She looked surprised when he used her name.

"Fine," Zuko said. "Take her to the galley; I'll meet you there."

While Zuko stayed on deck for a few minutes to confer with the guards, Iroh brought Katara down to the galley. Iroh closed the door behind them and turned to face Katara. His expression was calm, yet there was something negative about his countenance – disapproval or determination, perhaps. "Don't get comfortable," he told Katara. "I want a word with my nephew before making any decisions about you."

"I think his decision has already been made," Katara said dourly.

"Well, I'm not sure if it is a wise decision."

There was an awkward silence for a moment. Then Iroh spoke again. "We were never really introduced, were we? My name is Iroh. You're Katara, right?"

She nodded. "So you're Zuko's uncle?"

"That's right. Fire Lord Ozai is my younger brother."

Katara frowned. "But if you're older … shouldn't you be Fire Lord?"

Iroh suddenly looked uncomfortable. Katara bowed her head. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry."

"That's all right."

At that moment Zuko came in, closing the door behind him. When he faced them, he noticed Iroh glowering at him. "Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked indignantly.

"I don't like this, Zuko."

Zuko took it as a bad sign that his uncle didn't address him as the Prince. "I give the Avatar three days, tops, before he comes running in to save his girlfriend."

Katara looked like she'd been slapped in the face. "I'm not his girlfriend!" she burst out.

Zuko smirked. "I saw the way he looked at you, when he saw you on deck."

"He - he was worried because Sokka and I are his only friends in the world, and he wouldn't want to lose either of us. I love him like a brother, and I think he feels the same about me."

Iroh interrupted. "This is getting us nowhere. Zuko, listen to reason –"

"No, you listen. This way, we don't have to waste our time and energy chasing the Avatar; he'll come to us. I don't know why I didn't think of it sooner."

Iroh studied his nephew intently. "A hostage is only of use if you are willing to harm your hostage," he said. He narrowed his eyes at Zuko. "Are you?"

Zuko wavered for a moment. "I'm hoping I won't have to," Zuko said finally, "but the Avatar doesn't know that."

Katara sat down in one of the wooden chairs, pulling her knees up to her chin and hugging her legs to her chest. "If you try anything," she hissed, "you'll have my brother, the Avatar, and possibly my father to deal with. They'd never let you live it down."

Zuko looked shocked. "You think I'd …" He trailed off, and his expression became angry. "What do you take me for?"

Katara shrugged. "The Fire Lord's son, my best friend's enemy, a firebender, a sixteen-year-old boy who hasn't seen many teenage girls lately."

The corners of Iroh's mouth twitched. She had a point.

"You think I don't have morals?" Zuko shot back.

Katara opened her mouth to retort, but no noise came out. It occurred to her that maybe Zuko _hadn't_ been thinking about her that way … and she had insulted him by suggesting it.

"Really, I don't know anything about you," Katara said softly. "I don't know what you would or would not do."

"Fair enough," Iroh conceded.

Zuko scowled. "You should consider yourself lucky that I captured you instead of Commander Zhao. And those pirates – what do you think they'd have done to you, if I hadn't been there too?"

Katara frowned at the vaguely familiar name. "Zhao … the guy who captured all of us at the Temple of Avatar Roku? The burly man with big sideburns?"

Zuko nodded. "That's him. If you were his prisoner, he wouldn't be so kind. He'd torture information out of you."

Iroh looked at Zuko with a concerned expression. "We shouldn't let him know that she's here," he said. "He would take her for his own hostage, and as you say, he would be much worse." Iroh looked meaningfully at Katara. "Zhao is not an honorable man."

Katara understood the meaning of Iroh's words. She shivered.

"That's another thing I'm concerned about," Iroh continued. "Most of the men on this ship haven't seen a woman in a long time. I'm not sure she'd be safe here."

Zuko hadn't thought of that, but he didn't want to admit it. He bit his lip, thinking. "Well, I can't just let her go now. The Avatar ran off, and she might run into those pirates." Zuko looked at Katara. "I said I'd save you from the pirates, and I'm a man of my word."

Iroh sighed in defeat. "Very well." He glanced out the porthole. "I suppose we'll be having breakfast soon – unless anyone would rather catch up on their sleep. It has been a long night."

"Fine; you can see to her comfort. I'm going to bed." Zuko stomped off.

Iroh looked at Katara apologetically. "I am sorry about all this."

Katara didn't answer. She couldn't say _It's okay_, because it really wasn't. But she couldn't be as angry with them as she wanted to be, given their reasoning. Sokka and Aang were still evading the pirates, and she'd be safer here than if she were left by herself on land.

* * *

><p>It took another hour of running, evading, and fighting before Sokka and Aang were able to take off on Appa. "Do you think they'll keep trying to find us?" Aang asked from his place at the reins.<p>

"I don't think so," Sokka said. "Appa can fly faster than their boat can sail. … Hey, why are we still heading north?"

"Um, I thought we should trying to put some distance between them and us."

"And more distance between us and Katara?" Sokka demanded. Aang winced. "We need to track Zuko down, then we can bust in and get Katara out …"

"If we track Zuko while he's tracking us, we might end up going in circles," Aang remarked. "Plus, if we go after him now, he'll be expecting us – he's hoping we'll come rescue her."

"What other option do we have?" Sokka exclaimed. "Who knows what could happen to her if we don't come? Zuko might kill her, or torture her for information!"

Aang's brow furrowed. "I know Zuko's Fire Nation and our enemy, but he's still just a teenager. He doesn't come across to me as a potential murderer."

"You're right, he is a teenager. A teenage _boy_," Sokka said darkly, looking down at the saddle. "And his prisoner is a young teenage _girl_. You don't think …"

Aang gulped, trying to push away the mental pictures that Sokka's words had conjured. Then he shook his head. "Zuko said he needs to capture me to regain his honor. It wouldn't make sense for him to do something so … what's the word … _detrimental_ to his honor."

"I guess," Sokka said, not sounding entirely convinced.

"What would Katara say if she were here?" Aang mused.

Sokka was silent for a moment, biting his lip. He knew his sister well enough to guess what she would say. "She'd tell us not to worry about her. She'd tell us that she can take care of herself." He paused. "Katara is confident that you can save the world; she wouldn't want you to sacrifice the world to save her."

Aang looked at his hands, and then looked up at Sokka with an expression of concern and uncertainty. "Do you think she'll be okay?"

Sokka shrugged. "She's tough, Katara – tougher than you'd expect. I bet she'll give Zuko and the firebenders a piece of her mind."

The corners of Aang's mouth twitched. "I'd like to see that."

Sokka laughed halfheartedly. "Actually … if she's on Zuko's ship, she might be able to spy on him, learn about his plans and what the Fire Nation is up to. She can be our eyes and ears on his ship!"

Aang tapped the side of his head. "Positive thinking. A problem is only a misunderstood opportunity."

"But if we get the chance – if we can find Zuko again – we will rescue her," Sokka said adamantly.

Aang nodded. "Agreed."

They both privately hoped that they were doing the right thing.


	4. Three Cups of Tea

Chapter Five: "Three Cups of Tea"

"Oh, he is not bad at heart," Gwydion answered. "He would love to be wicked and terrifying, though he cannot quite manage it. He feels so sorry for himself that it is hard not to be angry with him. But there is no use in doing so." ~ Lloyd Alexander, _The Chronicles of Prydain, Book 1: The Book of Three_

Katara was reluctant to get up later that morning, even when she felt she had rested enough. She wondered if she was supposed to get up and have breakfast whenever she woke up, or if someone would come to tell her it was time to eat. Then it would be so awkward, eating breakfast with enemy troops. Not to mention there was the fact that she was the only female on the ship, and the only teenager besides Prince Zuko.

Katara was relieved when General Iroh knocked on the door and said softly, "Katara? We're having breakfast in the galley, if you want some."

"I'm coming." She slid off the cot and went over to the metal door. When she opened it, Iroh was talking to the two soldiers who had been posted to guard her room. He dismissed them with a nod and then led Katara down to the galley. "So … did you sleep well last night?" he asked, trying to break another awkward silence.

"Not really," Katara confessed. It was Iroh who had arranged for her to have her own room on the ship, and she appreciated that, but she'd never missed her family so much as that night. It was the first time she had ever gone to sleep by herself. Sokka was the only person who had always been with Katara whenever she went to sleep. When she was little there had been Sokka, her parents, and her grandmother all with her. Her mother had died; her father had left to fight in the war; and then Sokka and Katara left, so Aang replaced Gran-Gran. But Sokka had always been a constant in Katara's life. She realized that this was the first time that she had ever been apart from him – the first time she had ever been alone among strangers. She had never appreciated her brother that way.

Katara followed Iroh down the steps to the galley in the ground story of the command tower. Zuko and a few other soldiers were still eating here. A few glanced at Katara before quickly looking away and continuing to talk among themselves.

The cook slid two bowls of rice mixed with dried fruit over to Iroh and Katara, who sat at the same table as Zuko. "Good morning, Prince Zuko," Iroh greeted his nephew.

"'Morning."

_Is he always so sullen?_ Katara wondered.

Zuko noticed Iroh was making a face, like he was fighting back a smile. "Why are you smiling like that?" Zuko demanded indignantly.

Iroh smiled sheepishly. "Remember the reason we docked yesterday? To find a white lotus tile?"

"Of course I remember," Zuko said irritably. "What of it?"

"You're going to get a kick out of this, Prince Zuko. The lotus tile was in my sleeve the whole time!" Laughing, Iroh pulled the small round tile out of his sleeve with a flourish.

A few of the firebenders snickered. Zuko slapped his forehead, growling. He stood up and strode out of the room.

"Now I can get on with my life." Iroh tossed the game tile in the air and caught it in his palm. "Who's up for a game?"

The crewmembers murmured dissent; a few hastily excused themselves and left the kitchen. Iroh always won at Pai Sho, but the crewmembers sometimes gave in to playing, either to pass the time or appease the old man.

Iroh turned to Katara. "Do you play Pai Sho?"

"No, I've never played."

Iroh looked shocked. "Never played Pai Sho? You are in desperate need of a game!"

Katara laughed. "All right. I have nothing else planned."

When they had finished eating Iroh led her to the top story of the tower, which led to an outer observation deck. The rectangular room had panoramic windows and was furnished with a stove, a table with charts, and a Pai Sho table with four chairs. Iroh went over to the stove first. "Would you like some tea?"

"Sure. I mean – yes, please."

Iroh smiled as he poured her a cup. "The first time you share a cup of tea with someone, you are a stranger. For the second cup, you become a friend, or an honored guest. On the third cup, you become family."

Katara blinked at the old man. The proverb sounded strange, but it made sense if you thought about it. Aang would probably understand it – he had hidden wisdom, like Iroh. Katara felt a pang of homesickness thinking of the Avatar.

Iroh explained to Katara that the object of the game Pai-Sho was to create "harmonies" between the different flower tiles. "I believe it was inspired by the Earth Kingdom warriors' practice of flower arranging."

Katara raised her eyebrows. "Warriors kept gardens? Very macho."

Iroh looked at her for a moment before laughing.

"So why are you traveling with the Avatar?" Iroh asked.

Katara started to answer, but then stopped, frowning. "Is this a new interrogation tactic? Playing Pai Sho and drinking tea?" She was only half joking.

Iroh laughed. "No, although that's not a bad idea. I suppose it makes you more comfortable about spilling your secrets." Katara didn't laugh. Iroh added seriously, "No, honestly, I was curious. You must have had a relatively peaceful life at the South Pole. Why did you leave and get caught up in all this?"

Katara bit her lip, trying to think of what she could safely tell him. Iroh seemed harmless, even likable, but she couldn't afford to completely trust anyone. He might mention anything she said to Zuko.

"I think you can deduce why I would be traveling with Aang," she said ambiguously as she moved her tile.

Iroh raised his eyebrows at her and moved his piece.

"What about you?" Katara asked.

Iroh blinked at her. "What?"

"Why are you traveling with Prince Zuko?"

It was a question Iroh had not been expecting. He hesitated. Katara continued, "You're royalty, or you were once. You must have had a good life in the Fire Nation. Why did you leave to follow your nephew's crazed search? He doesn't seem to appreciate your help."

For a moment Iroh sipped his tea as he considered what she said; then he shrugged. "Zuko needs someone to look out for him, even if he doesn't want to admit it. I'm the only one he's got. And …" Iroh paused, bowing his head. "Since my son died … I think of him as my own."

"Oh." Katara felt a stab of sympathy for the old man. She'd lost a parent; he'd lost a child. That was what war did to families. But somehow she had never thought of people in the Fire Nation suffering from the war they had launched. "I'm sorry."

"Thank you."

For a moment they sat in silence, moving their tiles. When Iroh spoke, his tone was apologetic and sincere. "I know how you must feel about my nephew, but believe me when I tell you there is good inside him."

Katara pressed her lips together. "I know."

Iroh looked at her in surprise. "You do?"

She nodded reluctantly. "I hate to admit it, but I do. I mean, Zuko didn't hurt me when he captured me yesterday. He kept the pirates from hurting me. And he hasn't tortured me or locked me in a cell." She saw Iroh's pleased expression and added roughly, "I'm not saying it makes up for the bad things he's done. But yeah, you're right that there's good in him, I guess."

Iroh turned his attention back to the game. "Are you sure you want to move that piece? You could do this instead …" He explained that she could go in one direction and lose her piece, or go in the other direction and lose a different piece.

Katara shrugged. "Either way, I'll lose something."

"Life is like that, sometimes," Iroh said. "You know, having to make a difficult choice, and weighing your options."

Katara studied the game board for a moment longer, but then decided to go with her original strategy. The move that Iroh had suggested was intriguing, but it would change the rest of her game plan. Better to stick to the one she had originally intended.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I am so sincerely sorry it took me so long to post this chapter. I hope that starting a new story, "The Last Miserables," made up for it.

I was really pleased to get a couple reviews saying that my readers like how the story makes sense. I'm glad to hear it! I started this story as a response/reaction to the Zutara fanfics I read in which Zuko kidnapped Katara. In some, Zuko was really cruel to her, sometimes keeping her chained or locked up in the brig of his ship; in others, Zuko and Iroh took Katara out for a night on the town, and frequently Katara was found sharing a bed - or at least a room - with Zuko. This is how _I_ think Katara would be treated as a prisoner: Iroh would be kind to her, and Zuko would be at odds with her. Anyway, my point is I wanted to write a story with feasible motives and dialogue, and it seems I have succeeded. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed story so far: your reviews motivate me to keep posting the next chapter!

BTW, I got information about the game Pai Sho from _.com/Play-the-Ancient-Game-of-Pai-Sho_.


	5. Interrogation

A man's character is the reliability of himself. His reputation is the opinion others have formed of him. Character is in him; reputation is from other people. ~ Henry Ward Beecher

* * *

><p>Zuko was waiting on the main deck for Iroh after he escorted Katara back to her room.<p>

"Well?" Zuko raised his eyebrows at his uncle.

"Well what?" Iroh asked innocently.

"You and she must have talked," Zuko said. "Did she tell you anything?"

Iroh shrugged. "Don't get too excited when I say this. I did ask her why she was traveling with the Avatar."

"And?"

"She was very careful. She asked if this was a kind of interrogation. Then she said it should be easy to figure out why she's traveling with the Avatar."

Zuko furrowed his brow. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Iroh shrugged, holding his hands up in a gesture that clearly said, "Who knows?"

Katara's obstinacy was beginning to irritate Zuko. "She wouldn't answer me last night, either, when I asked her where the Avatar was." Zuko had thought that Iroh might be able to get some information out of the girl; but Zuko had a shrewd guess that the game had been more important to Iroh than the girl's knowledge. "I'll talk to her myself."

"She seems likable enough," Iroh said kindly. "You might want to try a compassionate approach."

Zuko glared at his uncle. "Do you remember what happened the last time I showed compassion?"

Iroh didn't answer; he wasn't supposed to. Of course he remembered.

Zuko shook his head and walked past Iroh, heading for Katara's room.

* * *

><p>Katara stared up at the ceiling, contemplating possible ways to escape. She was having some trouble; escape plans – well, plans in general – were Sokka's forte, not hers. What would he do in this situation?<p>

_Maybe I can dress up as a soldier – I'll wear one of those masks, so no one will recognize me. Or maybe I can convince Iroh to help me? Would he do that?_

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of someone unlocking the door. She sat up and saw Prince Zuko enter her room and close the door behind him.

_What does he want?_ Katara wondered. "Can I help you with something?"

Zuko folded his arms. "Actually, yes."

Katara blinked at him.

"Answer some questions for me."

So this was the official interrogation. _Figures,_ Katara thought to herself.

"Why are you working with the Avatar?"

Katara stared at Zuko. "Are you joking?"

Zuko shook his head. "I want to know why he means so much to you." It would be strategically valuable information, but Zuko was also curious, if he was honest with himself – which he rarely was.

Katara shrugged one shoulder. "Two reasons, both fairly obvious. One, he's my friend. Two, he's the only one who can restore peace."

Zuko looked unconvinced. "That doesn't explain why you'd leave your home to go running around with him."

Katara set her jaw. There was no way she was going to reveal Aang's goals – the fact that they were journeying to the North Pole, and that Aang was planning to master the elements by the time Sozin's Comet arrived. So far Zuko had merely been following Aang's trail; but if he knew their destination, he could go a step further, maybe even beat them to the North Pole.

"You're wasting your time," Katara said stubbornly, hoping to distract him. "You won't capture Aang. You might as well give up and go home."

Looking back on the conversation (if you could call it that) a short while later, Katara wasn't sure what it was that she had said; but at that point, something snapped inside Zuko.

"Do you think I _wanted_ this?" Zuko demanded. "Don't you think I'd rather not spend my time chasing a twelve-year-old around the world?"

Katara frowned, confused. "Then why are you?"

"For the reason I told you! Capturing the Avatar is the only way I can restore my honor. I have no choice!"

Katara studied the teenaged Fire Prince. "I don't see how capturing him will give you honor. No one can give or take your honor. Honor means being strong, moral, loyal, and ethical." Katara shook her head. "What I don't understand," she said, her voice rising with indignation, "is how you can regain your honor by doing such dishonorable things – attacking villages, bribery, making threats, stealing, kidnapping –"

"I didn't steal that necklace!" Zuko yelled. "You lost it, and I found it! If I hadn't taken it you wouldn't even know where it is now."

Katara ignored this interruption. "You're a horrible person, you know that?" she challenged. She seemed to be releasing all the resentment toward Zuko that she'd been bottling up for the past several weeks. "Always chasing us, hunting the Avatar, trying to capture the world's last hope for peace! But what would you know?" Katara said bitterly. "You're the Fire Lord's son. Spreading war and violence and hatred is in your blood."

Anger flared inside Zuko. "You don't know what you're saying," he retorted.

"I don't?" Katara demanded. "How dare you. You have no idea what this war has put me through – me personally." She reached up to her neck, where her mother's necklace used to be. "The Fire Nation took my mother away from me," she said, her voice breaking.

Zuko looked at her sadly; he couldn't help feeling a stab of sympathy for the girl. He knew what it was like to lose your mother.

"I'm sorry," he said truthfully.

Katara said nothing, but choked back a sob and wiped her eyes.

"That's something we have in common," Zuko offered.

Katara stopped crying. She looked up, genuinely surprised.

"You don't know what this war has put _me_ through," Zuko said, averting his gaze. He absentmindedly reached up and touched the scar around his left eye.

Katara's eyes lingered on Zuko – actually on his scar. Was that what he was referring to? How had he received such a wound? What happened to his mother? What did he mean? _You don't know what this war has put me through_.

"Do you believe in this war?" Katara asked curiously.

Zuko looked at her strangely. That was a bold question … and the last question he'd ever expected to be asked.

"I've … never really thought about it," he said.

"But you're the Prince of the Fire Nation. Aren't you supposed to have an opinion about it?"

Zuko snorted. "What I think doesn't make a difference." That was part of the wordless message that his father had sent him two years ago.

He noticed Katara looking at him strangely. "What?" he asked.

Katara struggled to find the words to explain. "When you become Fire Lord, you'll be able to make decisions about the war. You're going to inherit so much power – and you don't even seem to care."

Zuko shook his head. "It goes back to what I was saying before. I'll only inherit the throne if I capture the Avatar. And as for the things to do to get my honor back … I wouldn't expect you to understand," Zuko said bitterly, turn his back to her. "You're like my sister. Everything always came easy for her. She's a firebending prodigy; everyone adores her. My father says she was born lucky. He says _I_ was lucky to be born."

Katara stared at Zuko's back. For one thing, she hadn't known that Zuko had any siblings. For another, she couldn't imagine a father saying something so awful, showing such obvious favoritism. Maybe that was why Zuko went to such lengths to earn his father's love and acceptance.

"But I don't need luck," Zuko said, his voice hard. "I've always had to struggle and fight, and it's made me strong." He turned to his left, and Katara could see the scar on his face. "It's made me who I am."

There was a moment of silence. How was Katara supposed to respond to that? She probably wasn't.

Finally, Zuko ended the awkward moment by striding to the metal door. He yanked it open, went out into the hall, closed the door with a metallic _bang_, and locked it securely. Katara was left staring at the door, wondering what had just happened.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I'm sorry it took me so long to update this story. I had ideas for different scenes for the next couple chapters, but I had a hard time making them connect in a way that makes sense. Even now I am not entirely satisfied with the final product; but I have to get this story moving along, somehow. Also, school lets out next week, and then I may be able to publish and update stories more often. I appreciate your understanding, and I welcome _constructive_ criticism.


	6. A Duel

_Published June 30, 2011_

"One day, when I was oppressed by cold, I found a fire which had been left by some wandering beggars, and was overcome with delight at the warmth I experienced from it. In my joy I thrust my hand into the live embers, but quickly drew it out again with a cry of pain. How strange, I thought, that the same cause should produce such opposite effects!" ~ Mary Shelley, _Frankenstein_

It took Zuko less than twenty-four hours of mulling over what he knew about the Avatar and Katara to develop a theory. And there was a simple way to test it.

Zuko found Katara the next morning playing Pai-Sho with Iroh on the observation deck. Lieutenant Jee and an engine-room operator were there, poring over some maps on a nearby table.

"I need to talk to you," he told Katara rudely.

Katara narrowed her eyes at the Prince. "What do you want?"

Zuko got right to the point. "I think I know why you're traveling with the Avatar, and where he's headed."

"Oh really?" Katara tried to keep her face void of emotion; she couldn't let her reaction betray whether Zuko guessed right.

"It stands to reason," Zuko said. "The Fire Nation captured all of the waterbenders of the Southern Water Tribe – except for you. There was no one to teach you at the South Pole, was there? You were so desperate to learn that you stole a waterbending scroll. And you and your friends have been traveling northward ever since the Avatar returned." Zuko folded his arms and looked at Katara, but she remained unreadable.

"I think," Zuko continued, "that you're going to the North Pole. You want to find a waterbending master, don't you? And the Avatar wants to master the next element, water. So he's giving you passage on his sky bison." He looked sharply at Katara. "Well? Am I right?"

Katara scoffed. "Like I'd really tell _you_. You can't make me tell you anything!"

Zuko took her defensiveness as confirmation.

He leaned against the doorframe with his arms folded. "Tell you what. I'm willing to make a deal."

Iroh and Jee exchanged glances. Katara looked at Zuko warily.

"You don't have to worry about how you'll get to the North Pole. If you help me find the Avatar, or bring him to me, I'll give you and your brother passage to the North Pole."

Katara gaped at the Fire Prince. Was he serious? Thoughts ran in a torrent in her head. Was he being sincere? Could she trust him to keep his word? Or was he simply trying to trick her? Did he really think she was so shallow and selfish that she would turn in her friend so she could learn waterbending?

"What do you take me for?" Katara exclaimed. "A gullible fool, or a selfish fair-weather friend?"

Zuko glared at her. "I was giving you a chance."

Iroh noticed the tea in his cup sloshed around as Katara's temper rose.

Katara stood up. "Do you think that everyone is as two-faced as you are?" she said angrily.

Zuko's scarred face froze. Katara gasped and clapped her hands to her mouth, realizing she had said the wrong thing.

"Take it back," Zuko said, his voice dead calm.

Katara lowered her hands slowly. "No," she said defiantly.

"Take – it – back."

Katara stared him down. "Make me."

Zuko blinked at her, then set his jaw. "Is that a challenge?" he asked quietly, his voice cool and dangerous.

"I'm sure it is not," Iroh intervened, looking sternly at the two teenagers. "We could solve this much more effectively if you both swallowed your pride and apologized."

Katara made a face. The idea was clearly hateful to her. But then she looked resigned. "Fine." She hesitated.

"Someone has to go first," Iroh stated, looking between the two of them.

"I'm waiting, peasant," Zuko said impatiently with a smug smile.

At that moment, something inside Katara snapped. "No! No way am I apologizing to a spoiled, tyrannical, selfish, demeaning jerk like you!"

Iroh's pot of tea cracked, and it shattered on the table, spilling tea over the game board and onto the floor. Iroh gasped, momentarily horrified that his teapot was broken; then he looked at Katara in awe, realizing that her temper must have tapped into her bending.

Katara looked challengingly at Zuko. "I'll be on deck if you're man enough to fight me!"

Lieutenant Jee stiffened; the engine-room operator gasped audibly. Katara turned on her heel and stormed down the stairs of the metal tower.

General Iroh and Lieutenant Jee followed close behind her. "Katara, are you crazy?" Iroh asked.

"You're an untrained waterbender; Prince Zuko's been training in firebending all his life. He's older and bigger and stronger than you!" Jee said. It was the most he had ever spoken to her.

"You can't win this fight," Iroh said, holding his hands out pleadingly.

"I know," Katara huffed. "I don't care. Someone has to slap some sense into that guy."

Jee laughed a little. "True enough."

They came out onto the main deck. Katara stretched her arms, trying to loosen up her body. She'd never been in an actual duel before.

She heard someone climb the metal stairs down to the deck. Katara turned and faced Zuko with her hands on her hips. "So you decided to show up?"

"I welcome any change in pace," Zuko said carelessly. He needed to train, and if she wanted to fight so badly, then why not? At least it would be different, sparring with a waterbender instead of firebenders.

They stood on opposite sides of the deck, the long way. Iroh, Jee, and some of the crew stood beneath the tower, watching them uncertainly.

Katara waved her arms to her right, bending a stream of water out of the ocean. Zuko got into a stance. Blue eyes locked with gold ones. Zuko and Katara both had hardened expressions.

Finally Zuko made the first move, kicking out and unleashing a wave of fire. Katara quickly doused it with her water.

A smirk played on Zuko's face. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you," he said mockingly.

"Oh, bring it!" Katara retorted. "Don't worry about me!" She moved her arms left to right in a sweeping gesture; a wave rose out of the ocean and crashed onto the deck from the starboard side. Now she had more water close at hand. She tried to lash it out at Zuko, but he blocked the water and evaporated it before it made contact with him.

Zuko paused, folding his arms. "So you can make waves. I'm really impressed," he said sarcastically.

"I'd be a whole lot better if the Fire Nation hadn't _taken_ all the other waterbenders!" Katara shouted angrily. She summoned more water and launched a stream at Zuko, who was knocked backwards onto the deck, soaking wet.

"You little _peasant_!" Zuko snarled, standing up and glaring at her. "You want to learn to fight so badly? Watch closely!" Zuko held up his hands, and then punched forward repeatedly, releasing a barrage of fireballs in Katara's direction.

Katara cried out and ducked to avoid the fireballs. No – she wasn't going to let this turn into a cat-and-mouse game. She moved her hand out, palms facing down, spreading the water across the deck underneath Zuko. Then she breathed deeply and froze the puddles, creating a sheet of ice. Zuko slipped on the ice and lost his balance, falling forward on his stomach. Katara smiled in satisfaction.

Watching from the sidelines, the cook nudged the helmsman and whispered, "This is the best entertainment we've had since we signed on!"

Zuko looked up at his opponent, his golden eyes blazing with determination. He pushed himself up and spun around on his hands; fire shot out of his feet, melting the ice on the deck. Katara leapt out of the way to avoid the fire.

Zuko got to his feet again and closed in on Katara. He could tell she was caught off guard; she wasn't expecting close-contact fighting. Neither of them used bending as Zuko punched and Katara tried to block. Katara punched out at him, but Zuko grabbed her wrist and stepped behind her, twisting her arm.

"The key is to turn your opponent's force against them," Zuko coached, pinning her arm behind her back. Katara grunted in pain. "Do you yield?"

"Never!" Katara turned around under his arm, trying to twist herself out of his grasp. She waved her free hand and brought a stream of water up, slapping Zuko with it and causing him to let go and stumble back. "Hey – I did the water whip!" Katara sounded surprised but pleased with her success.

"Are you going to stop them, sir?" Jee asked Iroh, looking concerned as he watched the teenage benders.

"I don't know," Iroh said uncertainly. A smile slowly spread across his face. "I think it may be good for both of them, to meet someone equally proud and stubborn."

Zuko was impressed against his will. He could tell that the girl had talent, even if she hadn't been trained. This was the first time he had seen her hold her own in a fight. He'd already known her to be incessantly stubborn, and it showed when she fought; but now he saw that there was a fierce determination in her as well. _Okay, no more Mr. Nice Guy_.

The crew watched as Zuko and Katara exchanged more blows. Katara's braid fell out, and her hair fell down in dark brown waves. Zuko couldn't help thinking she looked nicer with her hair down.

Zuko tried to trip her, but Katara froze her feet to the deck to keep her balance.

"You can't knock me down!" Katara shouted defiantly.

Zuko was infuriated to hear some of his crew cheer for the waterbender. He _refused_ to let this infernal girl humiliate him in front of his crew. That anger fueled the energy in him, and he released it with a fiery punch, shouting something incomprehensible.

Katara tried to bend the water on the deck into a shield, but she was too slow. Katara was knocked backwards; she gasped as she felt the searing heat graze her hands. She landed on the hard metal deck, and she did not get up. She looked at her hands, panting and starting to cry; her hands were burned red.

Zuko froze in his fighting stance, looking shocked. He stared at Katara, who got up and ran below deck, pressing her burned hands to her stomach. She didn't want Zuko and his men to see her cry, as though she were a little girl – but it _hurt_.

Zuko looked around, bewildered. Iroh followed Katara below deck. The crewmembers that had been watching the fight looked stunned; a few glared at Zuko, and someone muttered, "Bad form!" They began to disperse, shaking their heads. Zuko stood there, looking helpless, not sure what to make of anything.

"What just happened?" Zuko asked, almost to himself.

"I believe you just hit a girl, sir," Lieutenant Jee answered curtly.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> Action scenes are not my forte, which I guess is why it took me so long to turn this chapter into something that might be worth posting. The good news is, this is my last tricky chapter for a while; I have the next few chapters already written out, and they are some of my best yet.

While I have your attention, I'd like to ask you to please participate in the poll I set up on my profile page. I can't decide where Long Feng should drown in my other fanfic, "The Last Miserables": Lake Laogai, since he has a strong connection to that place; or the polluted river in Jang Hui (from the "Painted Lady" episode), where some of the action takes place in my fanfic. I want your opinions, readers! Even if you're not following "The Last Miserables," I'm curious as to what you think.


	7. Elements Explained

_Published July 6, 2011_

**Author's Note**: I received mixed reviews for my last chapter. The first two were constructive criticism, and they made me rethink whether the previous chapter and this new chapter were really necessary. They aren't vital to the plot, so I actually considered deleting the previous chapter and not posting this one at all. But then I received some good reviews. I've decided to post this chapter anyway, since I already had it written out. Please, readers, let me know what you think. I might delete this chapter and the previous one, if they really aren't good or just don't make sense. This is all a learning process for me, figuring out what parts of a story make it work.

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><p>"I'd say someone here has the wrong idea about fire," he added. "It bites like a fierce little animal, admittedly, but you can tame it." ~ Cornelia Funke, <em>Inkheart<em>

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><p>Iroh set a bowl of cool water on the table in the galley. Katara was sitting in one of the wooden chairs, still crying and clutching her burned hands under her arms. After a moment she dipped her hands in the bowl. At first the water just made the burns sting more; Katara winced as the pain intensified. Then, almost as quickly, the pain faded. Katara opened her eyes in surprise and saw that her hands were glowing white. She lifted them out of the water, and they stopped glowing, leaving the skin smooth and unharmed.<p>

"You have healing abilities," Iroh informed her, looking at her with surprise and new respect. "A subtalent of waterbending. Some waterbenders – usually females – can use water as a catalyst for healing wounds."

Katara looked at her hands in amazement. "I never knew," she murmured. How strange, to find out there was a part of her that she had never been aware of.

Iroh sat down in the chair opposite Katara, shaking his head. "I'm sorry about that. I don't know what I was thinking, letting you two spar." He sighed. "One thing you and Zuko both have to learn is to choose your battles. You were just as impulsive as he is. Barely a month ago, he challenged Commander Zhao to an Agni Kai –"

"A what?"

"A firebending duel."

Katara looked at Iroh in awe. "Who won?"

"Zuko. But … it was not that simple. Zhao challenged Zuko, and told him to go ahead and deal a blow that would kill him. But Zuko would not. He started to walk away; then Zhao tried to attack Zuko while his back was turned. At that point I stepped in and stopped Zhao. I told him, 'Even in exile, my nephew is more honorable than you.'"

Katara furrowed her brow at the old man. Iroh really thought the best of his nephew. But Katara knew from experience that Zuko was more than capable of hurting people.

The door to the galley opened, and Zuko walked in, looking anxious and perhaps embarrassed. Katara had never seen him so ill at ease before. "Are you all right?" Zuko asked awkwardly.

"I am now," Katara said, holding up her unblemished palms. Zuko's mouth formed an O, and Katara explained, "The water healed me."

"The water didn't do anything," Iroh corrected. "You did it yourself."

Zuko shifted his weight, looked exceedinglyuncomfortable. Apologizing was not something he did often. He didn't know why he felt the need to do it now. Maybe because it was true that he was sorry?

"I … I'm sorry I burned you."

Katara looked at him for a moment, her blue eyes full of mistrust; then she looked away, apparently shunning him.

"Would you believe me if I said it was an accident?" Zuko said tentatively.

"Probably not," Katara said hotly.

"I swear, I didn't mean to burn you. Sometimes it just happens – I mean, it's fire we're talking about. What did you expect?"

"Of course; it's the element of destruction," Katara said harshly.

"It is not!" Zuko said defensively. "Water can be destructive too," he pointed out. "You can drown, or freeze to death, or be buried in an avalanche."

Iroh interrupted before it escalated into another argument. "All the elements are essential to life, but all of them can destroy life if misused."

Katara and Zuko both looked skeptical. Iroh gazed around the galley, trying to think of a good way to explain. His eyes fell on a potted plant on the counter.

"You see that jasmine plant?" Iroh pointed at the plant. He grew it so he could use the buds to make jasmine tea. "Suppose it grew on land instead of in a pot. What elements does it need to survive?" He looked expectantly at the two teenagers before him.

"It needs earth – good soil to keep it from blowing away," Katara said. Iroh nodded encouragingly.

"It needs air – plants take in carbon dioxide and release oxygen," Zuko added.

Katara spoke up. "It needs water for nourishment." She frowned. "But I don't see how it needs fire. In fact, fire could kill it."

Zuko had to think for a moment before he thought of a way that fire could help a living thing instead of hurting it. "Firebenders draw power from the sun, and plants need sunlight to grow."

"That's right!" Iroh said happily. "We need all four elements to have life; but too much of any of them can cause destruction. The key is keeping each of them in balance."

"That's why the Avatar exists," Katara said, and in spite of herself, she smiled. What irony, that the brother of the man who had thrown the world out of balance was teaching her about the elements.

"It is the presence of all the elements in one person that makes the Avatar so powerful – but it can make you more powerful too."

"I don't see how," Zuko muttered.

"_Element_ary, my dear nephew." Iroh laughed at his own bad joke. Zuko rolled his eyes, and Katara stifled a giggle.

Iroh stood up and got a blank scroll, a calligraphy pen, and an inkpot from a cabinet. He brought them over to the table and dipped his reed pen into the ink. "Air, water, earth, fire."

"That's the Avatar Cycle," Katara said.

Iroh nodded, and started drawing spirals in one corner of the scroll. "Air is the element of freedom. Unlike members of the other nations, all of the Air Nomads were airbenders, because they are so spiritual. They detached themselves from earthly concerns and found peace and freedom."

Now Iroh drew a symbol similar to the design on Katara's necklace. "Water is the element of change and adaptability. Waterbenders draw power from the moon, which pushes and pulls the tides and is constantly changing shape and position. The people of the Water Tribe are very capable and have a strong sense of community." He nodded respectfully to Katara.

"Earth is the element of substance. The people of the Earth Kingdom are proud, strong, persistent, enduring. Which I suppose explains why they have never completely yielded in the war, and why the Wall of Ba Sing Se has stood so well." Iroh's voice was wry.

"Fire is the element of power. The people of the Fire Nation have desire, will, energy, passion, and drive to achieve what they want."

Katara smiled ruefully. "That explains a lot."

"What?" Zuko said sharply.

"I mean –" Katara tried to find the words to explain it without offending or upsetting Zuko. "What he just said – that's kind of the way you are. You want to capture the Avatar, and you'll stop at nothing to do that. And it explains the Fire Nation's relentless warfare over the past century."

Zuko studied his prisoner, unsure if her comment was an insult or compliment. Then he looked back at his uncle. "Why are you telling us these things, again? I don't see how this would make either of us more powerful."

"It is important to draw wisdom from many different places," Iroh explained. "If you take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale. Understanding others, the other elements, and the other nations, will help you become whole."

Katara and Zuko exchanged glances. Then Zuko looked back at Iroh, narrowing his eyes. "Is this your subtle way of telling us that we should try to get along?"

Iroh smiled widely. "You said it, not me."

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><p>Katara and Zuko avoided each other for the rest of the day. It wasn't really hard; Katara stayed locked in her respective room, and Zuko went about his business on the ship, though he decided not to practice or train any more that day.<p>

Neither of them could understand why Iroh wanted them to try to "get along." Theirs should be simply a captive-captor relationship. There was no need for them to try to understand each other.

Katara prayed to the Moon and Ocean Spirits that she wouldn't be a prisoner much longer. She asked them to watch over Aang and Sokka, and grant her the courage to escape if she got the chance. In her prayers, she didn't bless Zuko, but she didn't curse him either.


	8. The Storm

_Published July 12, 2011. Revised July 2013_

"The Storm"

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><p>I will read ashes for you, if you ask me.<br>I will look on the fire and tell you from the gray lashes  
>And out of the red and black tongues and stripes,<br>I will tell how fire comes  
>And how fire runs far as the sea.<br>~ Carl Sandburg, "Fire Pages"

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><p>The next day – Katara's third day on the ship – dawned clear and beautiful. The sky was a pale blue, the ocean a deep azure.<p>

Iroh sniffed the air. "There is a storm coming," he said. "A big one."

"You're out of your mind, Uncle," Zuko said, lowering his spyglass. "The weather's perfect. There's not a cloud in sight." He gestured to the clear blue sky.

Katara watched Zuko critically. In her tribe, children were taught to respect their elders. No one would dare to speak to an adult – certainly not an old man, and especially not a retired general – the way Zuko had just spoken to his uncle.

True, Katara herself had lashed out at her grandmother the day she left the South Pole … but that had been different. She'd been so frustrated with her tribe for rejecting Aang and forcing her to pass up her chance to train in waterbending. Right now Zuko was just being disrespectful for no reason.

"The storm is approaching from the north," Iroh stated. "I suggest we alter our course and head southwest."

But Zuko was just as adamant as Iroh. "We know the Avatar is traveling northward; so we will do the same."

Iroh looked concerned now. "Prince Zuko, consider the safety of the crew."

"The safety of the crew doesn't matter!" Zuko burst out.

It was at that moment that Lieutenant Jee came up the stairs onto the main deck. He said nothing, just looked at Zuko.

Katara raised an eyebrow at Zuko. _You were saying?_

Zuko walked up to the lieutenant; he looked menacing despite being the shorter of the two. "Finding the Avatar is far more important than any individual's safety." He turned and strode down the stairs to the lower deck.

"He doesn't mean that," Iroh assured Jee. "He's just all worked up."

"Isn't he always?" Katara said sarcastically.

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><p>As the day wore on, gray clouds appeared on the horizon to the north, slowly but surely turning the sky black and ominous.<p>

"Looks like your uncle was right after all," Lieutenant Jee sneered.

"Lucky guess," Iroh said, smiling and shrugging modestly.

Zuko turned angrily to Jee. "Lieutenant, you'd better learn some respect – or I will teach it to you." He started to walk away.

Katara voiced what the rest of the crew was thinking, in a quiet yet powerful tone. "What do you know about respect?"

Zuko turned to look at her in surprise. Katara's voice rose slightly, becoming more angry and indignant. "The way you talk to everyone around here, from your hardworking crew to your esteemed uncle, shows you know nothing about respect."

Iroh looked anxious, clenching his teeth and making a cutting motion across his throat. But Katara didn't notice.

"You don't care about anyone but yourself," Katara said contemptuously. "But then, what else should I expect from a spoiled prince?"

Zuko clenched his smoking fists. Then he took on a fighting stance.

"Easy now," Iroh said, trying to calm things down.

Katara swiftly waved her arms and bended a stream of water out of the ocean, taking on her own stance.

"Enough!" Before either bender made a move, Iroh stepped between them, holding up his hands. "We're all a bit tired of being at sea for so long," Iroh said soothingly. "But I'm sure after a bowl of noodles, everyone will feel much better."

The two teenagers glowered at each other as they lowered their arms. Katara threw the water back into the ocean and stormed down the stairs to the lower deck.

Zuko angrily turned his back to Iroh. "I don't need your help keeping order on my ship."

Iroh reached out and put his hand on Zuko's shoulder, but Zuko shrugged it off, growling, and stormed away.

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><p>Lieutenant Jee's voice echoed in the high-ceilinged cargo bay, where the soldiers came to hang out and avoid the irate Prince. "I'm sick of taking his orders," he complained to three other crewmembers. "I'm tired of chasing his Avatar. The waterbender was right – he never appreciates anything. She's worth more respect than that prince. Who does Zuko think he is?"<p>

"Do you really want to know?" Iroh said quietly. He and Katara stood at the top of the stairs leading to the cargo bay.

Startled, Lieutenant Jee, the engineer, the cook, and a soldier stood up in respect. "General Iroh," Jee greeted nervously. "Miss Katara. We were just – ah –"

"It's okay," Iroh said, raising his hand in acceptance. "May we join you?"

"Of course sir."

Iroh took a seat in front of the fire, and Katara followed suit. She couldn't shake off feeling that she was intruding, joining the men's conversation.

"Try to understand," Iroh said, stroking his beard and regarding Katara and the crewmembers. "My nephew is a complicated young man. He has been through much." His voice became heavy. "Two, almost three years ago, when Zuko was thirteen years old, he wanted to attend a war meeting. I discouraged this, but he insisted that if he was to become Fire Lord he ought to learn as much as he could. I allowed him to go, but I made Zuko promise that he would not speak."

Katara thought she could see where this was going. If Iroh had told Zuko not to do something, it was most likely that Zuko had gone ahead and done it.

Iroh stared into the fire barrel. "As I recall, one general recommended sending a division consisting entirely of new recruits to act as a decoy. They would almost certainly be killed, and the general knew this. Zuko stood up and protested, saying that those soldiers loved and defended our country and that the general shouldn't betray them like that."

The corners of Katara's mouth twitched. Zuko's outburst reminded her of herself – compassionate, slightly idealistic, and ready to defend people in need. Who knew Zuko had that in him?

"Zuko was right, you see," Iroh explained. "But it was not his place to speak out, and there were … dire consequences. After Zuko's outburst in the meeting, the Fire Lord became very angry with him. He said that Prince Zuko's challenge of the general was an act of complete disrespect, and there was only one way to resolve this."

"Agni Kai," Lieutenant Jee said solemnly. "A fire duel."

"That's right. Zuko looked upon the old general he had insulted, and declared that he was not afraid. But Zuko misunderstood. When he turned to face his opponent, he was surprised to see that it was not the general.

"Zuko had spoken out against the general's plan, but by doing so in the Fire Lord's war room, it was the _Fire Lord_ whom he had disrespected. Zuko would have to duel his own father."

Katara stared at Iroh in horror. Even the crewmembers listened in complete silence.

"When Zuko saw it was his father who had come to duel him, he begged for mercy. Fire Lord Ozai would not have it; he told Zuko to rise and fight."

"What was he _supposed_ to do?" Katara asked indignantly. "Strike his father? Wouldn't attacking the Fire Lord just get him into more trouble?"

Iroh shrugged one shoulder. "I'm not sure what my brother was thinking. At any rate, he made the first and only blow. It was he who gave Zuko that scar."

There was a horrified pause as his audience digested this fact. Katara covered her mouth with her hand, horrified to the point of disbelief. Katara remembered Zuko absentmindedly touching his scar. _"You don't know what this war has put me through_." Katara's stomach clenched; fresh guilt coursed through her.

Iroh's eyes clouded over with the memory. "I looked away. Zhao was there – he was a captain at the time – and he watched the duel in fascination. I remember Zuko's younger sister, Princess Azula, seemed to relish seeing Zuko humiliated and hurt. Sadistic little firebender," Iroh said bitterly.

"I always thought that Prince Zuko was in a training accident," Lieutenant Jee said hesitantly, looking abashed.

"It was no accident," Iroh informed him.

"That takes child abuse to a whole new level," Katara said, her voice almost a whisper. "I can't believe it … what kind of parent would do that to their child? Just for speaking out of turn! All he wanted to do was save some lives!" Her voice rose and became angry and indignant.

The crewmembers looked at Katara, and suddenly she shrank back. "I can't believe I just defended Prince Zuko," she said, almost to herself, looking shocked.

Iroh continued his story. "After the duel, the Fire Lord said that by refusing to fight, Zuko had shown shameful weakness. As punishment he was banished and sent to capture the Avatar. Only then could he return with his honor."

"So that's why he's so obsessed," Lieutenant Jee said, understanding. "Capturing the Avatar is the only chance he has of things returning to normal."

_"__You're wasting your time. You won't capture Aang. You might as well give up and go home."_ No wonder Zuko had gotten so angry when Katara said that. And to think she had tried to lecture him about respect, when he had been so cruelly punished because of his disrespect … Katara felt her cheeks burn with shame. When she looked through his point of view … she'd been awful to him. No wonder he hated her.

"Things will ever return to normal," Iroh said solemnly. "But the important thing is, the Avatar gives Zuko hope."

"I guess that's another thing he and I have in common," Katara said quietly, staring into the fire. Actually, it was the last thing she had expected to have in common with Zuko.

They sat in silence for a minute. Then suddenly thunder crashed even louder than before; the electric lights dimmed, leaving only the fire for light; and the ship pitched and rolled far starboard.

"We've been struck by lightning," Iroh said, looking up at the ceiling. "Come on!"

The crew rushed up the stairs. Katara hesitated, wondering if she would only be getting in the way by going up; but she didn't want to be alone down here. She hurried up the stairs after the others.

Iroh, Katara, Zuko, Jee, and the small crew congregated on the top deck. Fire, air, and water raged around the ship in a three-way battle of the elements. The rain came down in torrents, and sometimes the wind buffeted the raindrops so that they traveled horizontally. Everyone was soaked within a minute. On either side of the ship, waves rose as high as small mountains, pitching the metal ship back and forth. It was all Katara could do to keep her balance.

Zuko turned to Lieutenant Jee. "Where were we hit?" he demanded.

"I don't know!" Jee answered, yelling to be heard over the howling wind.

"Look!" Iroh pointed up to the bridge tower, where a crewman was hanging off some of the rigging. Apparently that was where the lightning had struck the ship.

"The helmsman!" Zuko exclaimed.

Katara watched in amazement as Zuko and Jee quickly climbed up the metal ladder that led up to the bridge. She glanced at Iroh, who appeared tense, as through sensing something.

A crackling bolt of lightning pierced the air and snaked down to the ship, until it reached Iroh's extended arm. He deftly redirected the lightning away from the men trying to rescue the helmsman. Iroh could feel its energy travel down his left arm, into his stomach, and up through his right arm, which he aimed at the sky. When the lightning had finished its journey, Iroh stood on the deck looking bewildered, ashen gray in color. His hair, beard and clothes were singed and smoking, but otherwise he was undamaged.

Katara could just imagine Sokka saying, _That was the coolest thing I ever saw._

On the bridge, the rain made the metal railing slippery and even harder to hold on to. The helmsman's hand slipped away, and he started to fall the long distance to the deck.

Clinging to the metal ladder rungs with one hand, Zuko reached out with his other hand and caught the helmsman as he fell. For a moment the man dangled there, until Zuko let go and Lieutenant Jee caught the man lower on the ladder. Jee gave Zuko a small smile of triumph. The corners of Zuko's mouth turned upwards slightly; he wasn't exactly smiling, but there was the same sense of accomplishment and cooperation as in Jee's expression. Katara watched them with admiration.

The three men climbed down the ladder to the deck. That was when Zuko saw something white in the sky, standing out among the dark storm clouds. Katara followed his gaze and immediately recognized Appa.

"The Avatar," Zuko stated.

Katara's heart leapt. What were they doing in the middle of the storm? Did they know Zuko's ship was there? Were they going to rescue her now? Would Zuko try to capture Aang?

"What do you want to do, sir?" Lieutenant Jee asked.

Katara looked at Zuko uneasily while he paused to consider, his eyes still lingering on the flying bison.

"Let him go," Zuko said finally, lowering his gaze back to the crew. "We need to get this ship to safety."

Iroh allowed himself a small, satisfied smile. "Then we must head directly to the eye of the storm." Most of the crew quickly scattered to do as Iroh said.

A massive wave slowly rose up on the port side and threatened to crash onto the ship. Zuko and the soldiers looked up at it in horror. None of them expected the prisoner to yell, "Brace yourselves!"

Katara raised her arms, summoning all her strength, focusing on the intensity of the emotions she'd felt in the past hour – horror, rage, sympathy, admiration, triumph. Straining from the amount of water she was handling, she bended the ocean water in a way that used its own momentum, so that the wave veered sharply to the right, parallel to the ship. The crew looked up in amazement at the strange shape of water. The wave continued to move sideways until it crashed back on the surface.

Katara swayed and started to collapse with exhaustion. Zuko reached out and caught her in his arms. He held her up, and for a moment their eyes met. They stared at each other, startled by both their proximity and the fact that they were helping one another; and then they abruptly released each other. The moment was over before it had begun.

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><p>It was eerily calm in the eye of the typhoon. The wind had died down, and the rain was merely drizzling now.<p>

"Uncle," Zuko said quietly, "I am sorry." He was referring to the way he had acted earlier that day.

Iroh smiled and put a reassuring hand on his nephew's shoulder. "Your apology is accepted."

"Um … Zuko?" Katara's voice was tentative; she had never addressed the Prince by name before. He turned around and looked at her, waiting. "I didn't accept your apology yesterday. But, I want you to know, I forgive you. And I'm … sorry about what I said earlier."

Zuko blinked at her, surprised. Katara rushed on. "It was mean and … uncalled for. I take it back."

Zuko stared at her, as though seeing her clearly for the first time. Katara looked down at the metal deck, a blush creeping onto her cheeks.

"I … accept your apology," Zuko said finally, sounding uncertain.

In front of the prow of Zuko's ship, a gigantic glowing sphere emerged from the water in a boiling blue mass. After a moment the sphere dissolved, revealing Appa and three passengers – Aang, Sokka, and an old man.

Katara and Zuko watched in silence as Appa regained his balance and flew overhead. Aang looked down at the ship, and for a long moment he locked eyes with Zuko. Then he spotted Katara on the deck, alive, unharmed, and not particularly well-guarded at the moment.

Aang hesitated for a second. Should he swoop down and take this opportunity to rescue Katara? But Zuko's entire crew was right there on the deck. Then he saw Katara shaking her head. Aang knew she was right. Now wasn't the time: he needed to get Sokka and the fisherman to safety.

Katara watched as Aang flicked the reins and flew Appa up through the cylindrical eye of the storm, until they disappeared from sight.

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><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> Thanks so much to everyone who sent me reviews after my last chapter. I'm up to 35 reviews, and 12 of them came after I posted "Elements Explained." Maybe I should threaten to delete chapters more often … Just kidding. Seriously, you guys really helped me. As you can see, I decided to keep the duel chapter the way it was, because so many people wanted me to keep it, and I like it myself.

I felt a little uncertain about giving Katara some of Jee's lines from "The Storm," but I kept it because I thought it would be better to have more interaction between Zuko and Katara early in this chapter. (At least I didn't give them a full audience of crewmembers this time; only Iroh, Jee, and maybe a few others were present.)


	9. Kindred Spirits

_Published July 30, 2011. Happy Zutara Week!_

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><p>Die, you vain but sweet desires!<br>Die, you living, burning fires!  
>I am like a prince of France, —<br>Like a prince whose noble sires  
>Have been robbed of heritage;<br>I am phantom derelict,  
>Drifting on a flaming sea.<br>~ Fenton Johnson, "The Mulatto's Song"

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><p>Katara's thoughts were a little troubled, remembering the events of the previous day. Aang had appeared, and she could tell he was considering coming to save her. Why had she shaken her head when she saw Aang?<p>

Katara told herself it was because that simply made the most sense. They would have been outnumbered against Zuko's crew; and neither side was really in a condition to fight, after weathering the storm. It was logical. So why did it bother her?

It wasn't like she _wanted_ to stay on Zuko's ship. She was a prisoner! She missed Sokka and Aang and Appa; that was undeniable. But she didn't feel quite as angry about her situation as she had been at first. Maybe she was simply getting used to being a prisoner; or maybe she didn't blame Zuko so much, after learning about the reason behind his quest for the Avatar. Hearing that story made her think about the prince differently. And that unnerved her a little.

When Iroh invited Katara to another game of Pai Sho, she accepted, glad for a distraction from her thoughts. At the top level of the tower, Zuko and Lieutenant Jee pored over a map while Iroh and Katara played the game.

Katara noticed a subtle change in the behavior of Zuko and Jee. They were both a bit more patient and respectful toward each other. Katara thought that learning about Zuko's history must have softened Jee's attitude toward the exiled prince. And they both seemed more cooperative after their teamwork the night before.

"We haven't been able to pick up the Avatar's trail since the storm," Jee said. "But, if we continue heading northeast –"

He stopped midsentence. At that moment the sunlight was blocked by the shadow of a hulking object. Zuko went over the window and saw another Fire Navy ship passing them to starboard, going in the opposite direction.

"What do they want?" Zuko murmured.

"Perhaps a sporting game of Pai Sho," Iroh said hopefully. He moved a tile, and then he paused, looking startled. "Katara!"

She blinked at him. "What?"

But Iroh wasn't talking to her. He looked over at Zuko. "We can't let Zhao know she's here!"

Zuko and Katara exchanged worried, uncertain glances. After a moment Zuko came over to the Pai Sho table, grabbed Katara's arm and forced her to stand. "Hey!"

"Come on." Zuko pulled Katara over to a small closet, opened the door and pushed her inside. "Stay here until I tell you it's okay to come out," he hissed. There was a metallic _clang_ as Zuko shut the door, followed by a click as he locked it securely.

Katara sat down on the cold metal to wait. A few minutes later she heard heavy footsteps. She peered through the crack between the door and the wall, trying to watch the scene that was unfolding. Another soldier had taken her place at the Pai Sho table – one player would have looked strange. A man Katara did not recognize held up a scroll, a wanted poster depicting Aang.

"The hunt for the Avatar has been given prime importance." The herald lowered the scroll. "All information regarding the Avatar must be reported directly to Admiral Zhao.

"Zhao has been promoted?" Iroh said, looking up from the Pai Sho table. "Well, good for him!" he said cheerfully.

Zuko crossed his arms, and for a moment he looked like the moody teenager he really was. "I have nothing to report to Zhao," Zuko said sullenly. "Now get off my ship and let us pass."

"Admiral Zhao is not allowing ships in or out of this area," the herald stated.

"OFF MY SHIP!" Zuko yelled angrily, pointing at the door. Finally the herald left. Zuko waited until Zhao's ship had pulled away before letting Katara out of the closet. Katara looked at Zuko with a mixture of gratitude and uncertainty.

"That was close," Iroh commented gravely, dropping his casual pretense.

"I don't want to talk about it," Zuko said shortly, heading for the door.

"Thank you."

Zuko turned around in surprise, not sure if he'd heard right. Katara looked back at him steadily. She knew he was taking a risk, lying to Zhao to keep her safe.

"Don't thank me yet," he said coolly. "I just don't want the Avatar to turn himself over to Zhao instead of me."

* * *

><p>Zuko spent the next hour or so doing intense firebending training. He saw Katara and Iroh come onto the top deck, but Zuko ignored them both. The girl was starting to make him uneasy. He didn't understand what had prompted her apology the night before. And then, the Avatar had passed up the opportunity to rescue her. What was up with that? Did he think that Zuko would refrain from hurting his hostage?<p>

_He _saw_ that I haven't hurt her_, Zuko thought to himself. _He saw her walking freely around the ship_. That just may have ruined the entire situation. The Avatar wouldn't readily turn himself in if he knew that Katara was in safe hands. But he would still want her to be free, wouldn't he?

The hostage situation was becoming far too confusing. And now it was becoming dangerous as well; if Zhao found out that Zuko had withheld information regarding the Avatar, what would the consequences be for him? He had already cut it close when he returned to the Fire Nation a week ago. All Zhao needed was an excuse to arrest Zuko … and then Zhao wouldn't have to compete with anyone to capture the Avatar.

Frustrated and angry, Zuko released several fiery punches into the air.

"Are you okay?" Katara asked tentatively.

Iroh spoke up. "It's been an hour, and you haven't given the crew a single order."

Zuko's shoulders sagged as he looked out to sea. "I don't care what they do."

"Don't give up hope yet. You can still capture the Avatar before Zhao."

Zuko turned and looked at Iroh with an expression of desperation and fear that Katara had never seen before. "_How_ Uncle? With Zhao's resources, it's only a matter of time before he captures the Avatar!"

Zuko turned and looked out at the horizon. When he spoke, more to himself than to Iroh, his voice was flat and hopeless. "My honor, my throne, my country. I'm about to lose them all."

Katara felt a wave of sympathy seeing Zuko despair. After listening to Iroh's retelling of Zuko's past, she was starting to understand how he saw his situation. If he didn't capture Aang – what then? He had no home, no friends or relatives or allies to fall back on. Katara wanted to offer him some encouragement, but she couldn't motivate him to capture her best friend.

It was Iroh who spoke. "Don't talk like that, Zuko. You can't let yourself think that way, set up for despair. In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. That is the meaning of inner strength."

The corners of Katara's mouth twitched. "You sound like my mother," she told Iroh. Zuko glanced at her as she continued, "My mom was the one who always encouraged me with my bending. Many people in my tribe thought that the Avatar Cycle had been broken, that he'd never been reborn into the Air Nomads; but my mom told me not to lose hope. And I didn't."

Zuko looked out at the horizon again. "My mother told me I'm someone who keeps trying even though it's hard." He might have been talking to himself. Then he looked at Katara. "Thank you."

Katara was slightly surprised, but she felt pleased with his response.

Looking out at the horizon, something unspoken passed between them; even Iroh sensed it. There was still a lingering animosity – they could not simply ignore the fact that they were on opposing sides in this war. But now there was also a mutual respect and a strange, indefinable understanding between them. They had both lost their mothers and been forced to grow up quickly; they both struggled to keep hope even when things were at their worst. They both drew hope from the Avatar, but in such different ways that that similarity was the driving force to keep them apart.


	10. The Blue Spirit

_Published August 5, 2011_

The idea pulls me up short. A kind Peeta Mellark is far more dangerous to me than an unkind one. Kind people have a way of working their way inside me and rooting there. And I can't let Peeta do this. Not where we're going. ~ Suzanne Collins, _The Hunger Games_

* * *

><p>Aang wondered if this was how Katara was feeling lately – dejected, helpless, hopeless. Probably to a lesser degree, Aang decided. She wasn't shackled and immobilized, since her bending prowess was much less than Aang's. Her hope lay with Sokka and Aang – the brother who would rescue her, and the friend who would end the war. But Aang had no one who he could hope would rescue him. Katara was imprisoned, Sokka was sick, and they had no idea where he was anyway. He was all alone. And now Sokka was suffering because he hadn't brought a cure for him. And it looked like Katara would remain Zuko's prisoner, unless he brought her to a waterbender prison as he had threatened …<p>

Aang's thoughts were interrupted when the door opened, and Zhao walked in, his hands clasped behind his back.

"So this is the great Avatar," Zhao drawled, circling Aang. "Master of all the elements. I don't know how you've managed to elude the Fire Nation for a hundred years, but your little game of hide and seek is over."

"I've never hidden from you!" Aang said angrily. "Untie me and I'll fight you right now!"

Zhao pretended to consider. "Uhh, no." Then he changed the subject. "Tell me, how does it feel to be the only airbender left?" He brought his face up to Aang's. "Do you miss your people?"

Aang's defiant expression disappeared. He bowed his head sadly, feeling a wave of guilt and homesickness wash over him. The storm had brought back painful memories; but then he had decided he was done dwelling on the past. Still, he would never forget where he came from, the people he had left behind, the civilization that had died because of him.

"Oh, don't worry; you won't be killed like they were." Aang looked up again in anger. Zhao continued, "See, if you die you'll just be reborn and the Fire Nation will have to begin its search all over again. So, I'll keep you alive … but just barely."

Zhao turned to leave, still smirking.

Aang decided to voice something that he'd been turning over in his head since the Yu Yan captured him. "Can I ask you a question?"

Zhao turned back and looked at his prisoner, but then shrugged. "I can't stop you; but I won't necessarily answer it."

"You wouldn't happen to know where my friend is, would you?"

Zhao blinked at the Avatar. "Sorry?"

"My friend Katara – the waterbending girl? Prince Zuko captured her."

The admiral looked slightly surprised. "Did he? I wasn't aware he had a hostage."

"So you don't know where she is?"

"No."

Aang guessed from Zhao's reaction that the admiral was telling the truth. Aang hung his head, disappointed.

The gears were turning in Zhao's mind as he left the Avatar's cell. So Zuko had lied to his messenger: he'd had information regarding the Avatar – an actual hostage – and had withheld it from Zhao. But then, Zhao reasoned, it didn't matter now. He had the Avatar in custody; what difference would it make if Zuko had the waterbender prisoner?

No difference at all.

* * *

><p>Zuko disappeared from the ship that night.<p>

Iroh didn't seem all that worried; he reasoned that Zuko must have gone to the mainland for some reason or other. "Maybe he just didn't want to put up with music night," he said, winking at Katara. She grinned; she knew Zuko probably wasn't as a big fan of music as his uncle. Even the crew enjoyed music night, seeing it as a break from their work on the ship – and a time when Zuko was out of their hair.

Katara could hear the music on the main deck when she went to her room. She was about to get into bed when she spotted something blue standing out from the red pillow. She crossed the room and gasped.

It was her mother's necklace.

Katara had almost forgotten that Zuko still had her necklace. She hadn't bothered to ask for it back, because she'd figured that he would simply refuse. And then suddenly, out of the blue, he had returned it to her.

Why?

Well, he knew now that Katara had lost her mother, which explained why the necklace was so important to her. But he'd known that since the first day she was on the ship, and he hadn't returned the necklace until now, three days later. (Or was it four? She counted four days she had been on the ship.)

Maybe it was a kind of peace offering. Maybe this was his way of apologizing for burning her in their duel, and thanking her for her help during the storm.

Or maybe he simply didn't think the necklace was of any value to him, since Katara had refused it as a bribe. But even if that was so, he didn't need to return it to her.

Maybe he was just being kind? The thought made Katara realize, with a jolt, what she was feeling: she was touched that Zuko had returned her necklace.

It was so strange, these past few days; Katara found herself feeling so many emotions that she'd never thought would be directed at Prince Zuko. She felt sympathy for him, now that she knew his story. She felt grateful to him for saving her from the pirates and keeping her a secret from Zhao. In fact, she was starting to like him as a person.

Katara shook her head. She couldn't afford to become attached to Zuko or Iroh. That would make her reluctant to leave, and might make her hesitate while fighting Zuko in the future.

True, now Katara respected them and better understood them, but they were still her enemies. That's why she was here in the first place – she was a prisoner. If Zuko did care about her at all – and that in itself was questionable – he cared more about capturing the Avatar.

Caring about Zuko would be like playing with fire. Fire was nice to look at, and beneficial for warmth and cooking, but getting too close to the fire would only cause harm.

* * *

><p>Zuko had a headache; that was the first thing he was aware of. He blinked up at the mass of green and gold high above him. He turned his head and saw the Avatar sitting on a large tree root. That's when everything came back to him: breaking into Zhao's fortress, rescuing the Avatar, almost getting away … then he'd been knocked out … and the Avatar had brought him here? Why would he bring Zuko with him?<p>

Aang spoke. "You know what the worst part of being born over a hundred years ago is? I miss all the friends I used to hang out with. Before the War started, I used to always visit my friend Kuzon." Aang smiled reminiscently "The two of us, we'd get in and out of so much trouble together. He was one of the best friends I ever had," he said, looking sideways at Zuko, "and he was from the Fire Nation, just like you. If we knew each other back then, do you think we could have been friends too?" He looked at Zuko with a hopeful half-smile.

Zuko stared at him. Was the Avatar serious? Was he really that naïve and idealistic?

But then again, maybe the idea wasn't so crazy; they had made a pretty good team, cooperating the night before.

Zuko felt inexplicably angry. He yelled something unintelligible and shot a blast of fire at the Avatar.

Aang jumped into the air to avoid the fireball and landed on a high tree branch. He looked down at Zuko, all nostalgia and mutuality gone. They were enemies, and nothing else.

"What have you done with Katara?" Aang demanded.

"I haven't done a thing with her!" Zuko shouted back. He punched upward, sending another fireball at Aang, who swiftly deflected it by slicing the air in front of him.

"_Where is she?_" Aang shouted angrily.

Zuko got out of his stance and gestured to the west. "If you come with me, I'll show you."

Aang shook his head. "She'll never forgive me, if I turn myself in for her."

Zuko held up his hands. "Then we're at an impasse. If you don't give yourself up, I won't free her."

Aang clenched his teeth. "It's not an impasse. This isn't over," he vowed. Then he turned and leapt from one tree to another, disappearing from Zuko's sight. Zuko didn't bother to give chase; the Avatar was too quick, and had the advantage of using airbending to propel himself.

But Aang didn't go far. Once he was out of sight, he backtracked and found Zuko again, but he stayed out of sight, hiding high in the trees out of Zuko's reach. Aang stealthily followed Zuko to the bay where the metal ship was anchored. Aang smiled in satisfaction. He'd found Katara. But he couldn't attempt a rescue alone; he would need Sokka's help. And right now Sokka needed _his_ help.

Zuko changed into his usual armor in the metal cutter. He passed Iroh on the main deck, playing the Tsungi horn he'd bought the day Zuko captured Katara. "Where have you been, Prince Zuko?" Iroh asked. "You missed music night. Lieutenant Jee sang a stirring love song."

Zuko ignored the question and headed for the door. "I'm going to bed. No disturbances."

Iroh looked mildly concerned, but he shrugged and continued the song he'd been playing, a mournful, mysterious tune.

Zuko hid his disguise and went to bed, but he couldn't fall asleep, despite his exhaustion. The Avatar's words echoed in his head. _Do you think we could have been friends?_ Zuko hadn't even bothered to attempt an answer; he had acted impulsively — as usual — and simply attacked the Avatar.

Lost in thought, Zuko stared at his wall hanging with the Fire Nation insignia. The Avatar's question made Zuko think, unbidden, of Katara. Before he could stop himself, he wondered: if he and Katara didn't have the Avatar between them — if they weren't on opposite sides in the war — could they have been friends? Or maybe … more than friends?

Zuko turned on his side, trying to shake the idea. It didn't matter anyway, he decided. He couldn't dwell on how things might have been. What was important was how things were now.

* * *

><p>Aang went back to the bog and found the frogs that the Herbalist had told him to get. It was ironic, he thought – at first he hadn't found what he was looking for, but then he had found something he <em>wasn't<em> looking for: Katara.

Finally Aang was able to get back to the cave, exhausted, but with the thing he had intended to get. He stuck the frog in Sokka's mouth, and then flopped back onto Appa's furry leg. They both had to get their strength back before they could rescue Katara.

"Aang, how was your trip?" Sokka asked, talking around the frog. "Did you make any new friends?"

Aang looked wistfully up at the ceiling of the ruins, thinking of Zuko. "No, I don't think I did."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> This may be my last chapter for a while, because I'm not sure exactly how things will go for the next few chapters, though I know the general direction I want to go in. If you're really anxious to know what happens next, send me a review, and I'll be motivated to write, and write fast. BTW, happy Tokka Week (if you like that)!


	11. Opposites Attract

_Published September 5, 2011_

"Fire and water," he said, "don't really mix. You could say they're incompatible. But when they do love each other, they love passionately." ~ Cornelia Funke, _Inkspell_

Zuko slept late into the afternoon. He wondered if he would see Katara much that day. He couldn't decide if he hoped he would or would not. How many days had she been here now – five?

He decided he would focus solely on his training that day. Hopefully it would take his mind off the tangled hostage situation, and the nagging memories of the previous night's excursion.

When he left his room he passed Iroh in the hallway. "Ah, Zuko, you're up! I was just going to escort Katara to lunch. Care to join us?"

Zuko shrugged indifferently. "Sure, I'll meet you there." He walked past Iroh in the direction of the galley.

By the time Iroh and Katara came down, Zuko had already received his plate of food. When they sat down with him, Zuko noticed that Katara was wearing her necklace again. But she didn't mention it. Good; he'd rather not talk about it. He still wasn't sure what it was that had prompted him to return the necklace. Maybe it was the moment they had shared earlier, when she mentioned her mother and keeping hope alive. In any case, it wasn't of much use to him.

"We were just talking about the storm the other day," Iroh said, pouring tea for the three of them. He looked over at Katara. "How did you manage to bend the wave like that?"

Zuko was curious about that, too. "I was surprised," Zuko said. "You said you haven't been trained; but that – that was incredibly powerful bending! How did you do it?"

Katara looked at the table, a frown on her face, thinking. "Sometimes, I find that when I'm feeling a strong emotion, or if I think about someone or something I care about, I can bend water better. When I saw the wave coming, I thought about how much I miss Aang and Sokka, how angry you make me, and how well everyone was cooperating during the storm." It was true; but she didn't say that she had also been thinking about how she felt listening to Iroh's story about Zuko. She didn't want to think about how he would react if he knew that she knew.

Iroh nodded understandingly. "Waterbending requires letting your emotions flow smoothly like water. Suppressing your emotions can inhibit your bending; accepting your emotions, and coming to terms with them, can improve your bending."

Zuko addressed his uncle. "During the storm, you redirected lightning. I've never seen you do that before."

"I was actually surprised that it worked," Iroh confessed, looking slightly puzzled.

"So, firebenders can control lightning?" Katara asked.

Iroh nodded. "We can redirect lightning, and a few of us can generate our own lightning. I know of only a few firebenders capable of creating lightning – my brother, Fire Lord Ozai; and Zuko's sister, Princess Azula."

"Can you show me how to do that?" Zuko asked.

Iroh stroked his beard, looking uncertain. "Well, I suppose I can teach you the theory." Iroh turned to Katara. "You might like to see this. I developed the redirecting technique by studying waterbenders."

Katara looked amused. "I never thought I'd learn waterbending from a firebender."

"Actually, waterbending and firebending are similar in that they are both fueled by emotion," Iroh said. "Firebending releases the energy brought by emotions." He looked at his Katara and Zuko and smirked.

"What?" Zuko said, looking suspiciously at him.

"I was just thinking, that must be why you two are such powerful benders. You both have large tempers." Iroh chuckled, but then his face became serious. "But lightning is not fueled by emotion like other firebending. It requires peace of mind.

"There is energy all around us. The energy is both yin and yang – positive energy, and negative energy."

"Am I allowed to ask questions?" Katara said.

"Certainly."

"What are yin and yang?" Katara asked.

Iroh's expression was so surprised it was almost comical. "You don't know what yin and yang are?" He shook his head. "Ah, we must go back to the fundamentals." Iroh got a sheet of paper from a cupboard and brought it back to the table. Then he drew a circle with a wavy line in the middle and two dots on either side of the line. "Yin and yang is the principle of opposites attracting. Air and earth, fire and water – opposites, but both necessary. Two parts of one whole. In this case, positive and negative.

"Yin is female, passive, dark, shaded, diffusing, soft, reflective, cold. It is associated with the moon, water, endurance, the need for completion, and supportiveness."

Zuko glanced at Katara, but then quickly looked back at the drawing. Iroh was still talking. "Yang, in contrast, is male, active, bright, solid, hard, and warm. It is associated with the sun, fire, light, heat, toughness, initiative, leadership, motivation, and aggression."

Katara stole a glance at Zuko, then quickly looked away. They both stared at the ink drawing. They knew they were thinking the same thing: Iroh's description of the opposite counterparts seemed to correspond to Zuko's and Katara's elements and personalities.

Iroh stood up. Katara and Zuko followed him up to the top deck. The sun was high overhead; Zuko and Iroh's firebending would be at its strongest now. "Only a select few firebenders can separate the positive and negative energies. This creates an imbalance. The energy wants to restore balance, and in a moment the positive and negative energy come crashing together. You provide release and guidance, creating lightning." Iroh held his hand up, gesturing for Zuko and Katara to stand back. He held up two fingers and moved his hand in a circular motion. Electricity crackled around his arm. Then Iroh shot his arm out, sending a bolt of lighting into the sky. Katara was awed.

"I'm ready to try it," Zuko said confidently.

Iroh got out of his stance. "Remember, once you separate the energy, you do not command it. You are simply its humble guide. Breathe first."

Katara took several steps back. Zuko breathed in deeply and closed his eyes. He began to mimic the motions that Iroh had gone through, but there was no spark or electricity. Zuko shouted and shoved his right hand forward, but instead of lightning, it created a fiery explosion that shoved him backward. Katara winced as he landed hard on the metal deck.

Zuko tried repeatedly for almost an hour. Katara watched, having nothing else to do, while Iroh tried to coach Zuko. He only stopped when one of his explosions seared a burn mark on his forearm; after a while he had taken off his heavy armor, leaving just his pants and a sleeveless shirt.

"That's enough for now," Iroh said firmly. "Now let's have a look a that arm."

Reluctantly Zuko held out his arm for Iroh to examine. It was a low first-degree burn. "That looks bad," Katara said sympathetically.

Zuko's face hardened as he tried not to wince. He didn't want sympathy from this girl – his prisoner. He would not appear weak in front of her.

"Do you want me to heal that?" Katara offered.

Zuko looked at her for a moment, torn between the pain and his desire to appear strong. Finally he nodded assent. The three of them headed back into the galley. Katara bended the water out of a bowl and made a glove on her hand. She placed her hand gently on Zuko's arm. She hoped he didn't notice how her hand rested on his muscle.

"Why can't I do it?" Zuko exclaimed. "Instead of lightning, it keeps exploding in my face! Like everything always does!"

"I was afraid this might happen," Iroh said solemnly. "You will not be able to master lightning until you have dealt with the turmoil inside you."

"What turmoil?" Zuko snapped.

Iroh could think of many examples, but there was one that was more relevant at present.

An awkward silence hovered in the room. Katara glanced back and forth between Iroh and Zuko. "Um … I'll just … leave you two alone," she muttered, turning on her heal and walking away.

"What turmoil?" Zuko repeated.

Iroh smiled slyly and jerked his head at the door. "Katara's a pretty girl, yeah?"

Zuko stared at his uncle. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Your turmoil."

Zuko's mouth dropped open. "What – I – you think –" he spluttered. "You think _that's_ why I can't make lightning?"

"Among other things," Iroh said loftily.

"You're crazy!"

"Zuko," Iroh said gently, "there is no shame in caring about someone."

"I don't _care_ about her!"

"Well, she cares about you."

Zuko blinked, caught off guard. "She does?" he said stupidly.

Iroh let out a short burst of laughter. "Haven't you noticed?"

Zuko thought about it for a moment; he couldn't stop himself. It was true that Katara had been more civil with him, after the storm. She had tried to offer him comfort when he was feeling hopeless. She had healed his burn just now.

Had there been a reason behind her change in behavior?

Zuko shook his head. "It doesn't matter," he said adamantly. "I don't care about her."

Iroh raised his brow at Zuko. "So if I were to send her to a torture chamber, you wouldn't be concerned?"

Zuko slapped his forehead in frustration. "You're twisting what I said."

"Would you?"

"No. Look," Zuko said impatiently, "I respect her, all right? That's all. That's more than I can say about her brother or the Avatar," he added roughly.

"I don't think so," Iroh said slyly. "I think you actually like her. But you are afraid to show it, because you don't want to look weak. But apathy is not a show of strength. It's pathetic!"

Zuko looked insulted now. "You're calling me pathetic? This from the man who altered a ship's course – on a mission that could help his nation win the war – just to get a stupid game piece!"

Iroh sighed and stood to leave. But he paused at the doorway. "Change her heart, and let her change yours." Then he walked away, leaving a frustrated and confused Zuko by himself.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> When Labor Day Weekend started, I vowed I would finish this chapter and post it before the long weekend ended; and I'm pleased to say I reached my goal! I was already planning to use the lesson about lightning from "Bitter Work" to lead to the yin and yang discussion. But then I watched that episode again, and I finally hit on a bridge to lead to Zuko arguing with Iroh about Katara. BTW, I have a new poll set up on my profile page, about which story I should work on next.

**Disclaimer:** The line "Change her heart, and let her change yours" was first used in "The New Avatar: A Zutara Fanfic" by DarkAngelKimimuso-hime, who graciously gave me permission to use it in my own capturefic.


	12. He Cares

_Published October 1, 2011_

* * *

><p>No one talks about fire<p>

right to my face.

They can't forget how fire changed my life.

But I hear them talking anyway.

~ Karen Hesse, _Out of the Dust_

* * *

><p>Barely a minute after Iroh left Zuko alone, Katara came back into the galley.<p>

"What do you want?" Zuko said irritably.

Katara shrugged; she wasn't sure herself. She only felt that she needed to talk to him.

"Did my uncle send you in here?" Zuko demanded.

"No. And you shouldn't have spoken that way to your uncle," she said.

"Why do you care?" Zuko asked harshly.

"I don't know," Katara admitted. "I guess I'm just a caring person. I can't help it." Like she couldn't help caring about Zuko.

Zuko didn't respond. Seeing an opening, Katara said tentatively, "I think you're more caring than you want anyone to realize."

Zuko narrowed his eyes at her. He wasn't going to give her a response that she could twist. If she wanted to ask him something, she'd have to say it herself.

"Do you …" Katara felt uncharacteristically shy; she could barely get the words out. "Do you care about me?"

Zuko stared at her incredulously for a moment, before smacking his forehead in disbelief. "Not you too!" he muttered.

"What?" Slowly Katara realized that must have been what Iroh and Zuko had argued about.

"I don't care, do you hear me? I _don't care!_" He turned away from her, folding his arms. They were both silent for a minute, as Zuko cooled down and Katara collected her thoughts.

When Katara spoke again, her voice was quiet and gentle. "I know sometimes it hurts to care. The more you care, the more you have to lose. And you've lost more than anyone should. But you can't just _stop_ yourself from caring –"

"Wait a minute." Zuko turned around, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. "What do _you_ know about – how did you say it – what I've lost?"

Katara froze, realizing she had made a mistake. She had forgotten that Zuko didn't know that she knew about how he was banished. "I … well, you said you lost your mother, and your honor, and your home …" Her eyes flickered to his scar; then she looked down, hoping he hadn't noticed.

But he had. "What do you know about it?" he demanded.

"I … I …"

"_Iroh_." That traitor! "He told you about that? About how I was banished?"

"Look, don't blame Iroh," Katara said reasonably. "The night of the storm, the crew was badmouthing you, and I was still angry with you, he wanted us to understand –"

Zuko roared and punched a fireball at the wall, melting a dent in the metal. Katara cringed, but she didn't back down.

Zuko glared at her. "So what, now you think you have me all figured out?"

"No – not completely," Katara said evenly. "But it showed me there's a lot more to you than I previously realized. And I think it explains why you won't admit that you care about me. That day shaped your whole personality. You got in trouble for questioning one general's decision. Now, you don't dare question your nation's actions. You don't openly show compassion. Your arrogance, your cool demeanor – it's a mask. You're really hurting, but you don't want anyone to be able to see that. You don't want to look weak."

Zuko gaped at her. He had never analyzed his own emotions that way; but he knew that Katara was right. Suddenly he felt inexplicably angry with the girl. Zuko hated that she could see right through him. She had no right. Who was she to claim she understood how he felt?

But Katara wasn't done. She looked directly at him and said, "You care about me, but you don't want to admit it. You're too proud to do that. You don't want to seem vulnerable."

"Stop it," he said, his tone somewhere between menace and desperation.

Katara, unfazed, looked straight into his golden-amber eyes. "Whether you want to admit it or not, you know I'm right."

Zuko moved so suddenly Katara had no time to react. In a moment he had her backed up against the wall, his arms on either side of her, pinning her wrists against the wall. His body was mere inches away from hers. She was trapped, at his mercy.

"Is _this_ what you want?" Zuko hissed in her ear; she could feel his hot breath on her neck.

Katara tried to keep her breathing steady. He was trying to scare her, to ward off any feelings she might have for him. But she wasn't going to let him. She simply looked at him, her blue eyes calm and unafraid.

"I know you won't hurt me," she said. "You're not that kind of person."

Zuko glowered at her. After a moment he released her wrists and stepped back. Zuko looked at her with loathing – more than she'd ever seen him direct at her. "I hate you," he said venomously, each word stretching out slightly.

Katara paused, merely looking at him. "I don't hate you," she said simply, her tone calm. "I never have, and I never will. There's nothing you can do that will make me hate you."

It was too much for Zuko to handle.

Then he did the last thing Katara had expected. He sat down and buried his scarred face in his hands. From the way his body shuddered, it almost looked like he was … crying?

Katara watched Zuko helplessly, not knowing what to do. Should he leave him alone, give him time to sort this out? Or should she try to comfort him, as she would Sokka or Aang? She tentatively put her hand on Zuko's shoulder.

Zuko jerked away, standing up suddenly. "Don't touch me!" he yelled at her. He hated her for making him feel so weak. "Get out!"

Katara turned and ran out of the room. She passed Iroh in the hall, but she brushed past him without an explanation; she saw his concerned expression out of the corner of her eye.

She didn't start to cry until she reached her respective bedroom. Katara slammed the door shut, threw herself onto the cot and sobbed into her pillow. She couldn't remember the last time she'd cried so much.

It was the first time she had ever cried over a boy, she noted wryly.

She turned on her side, and her hand went up to her necklace. It was at times like this that Katara missed her mother the most. Why couldn't she be here to guide Katara through the trials and tribulations of simultaneously being a teenager and enduring a war? Or even her father – why did he have to leave right before his children entered the teen years? Katara had no one she could talk to about this. Even if she hadn't been separated from Sokka and Aang, there was no way she could talk to them about this – she didn't want to think about how they would react, if they knew she had feelings for the Fire Prince. That was a whole other set of problems. Katara curled up in her bed, aching for her friends, and for Zuko.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> This chapter was tricky to write – it's hard to keep someone as complex as Zuko in character. But I like how it's turned out.

That line "I don't hate you. There's nothing you can do that will make me hate you," was taken from Chickygurl's fanfic "He Cares," after which this chapter is named. That story also gave me the idea for Katara and Zuko's argument about the definition of honor, when he tried to interrogate her earlier.

Here's a story and an explanation that I've been sitting on for a long time: Chickygurl's capturefic "Unsuspecting Love" was the first ATLA fanfic I ever read – and it's kind of what caused me to write this story, my very first fanfic. See, there were so many parts of "Unsuspecting Love" that I disliked, I started toying around with them, rewriting them – kind of writing fan fiction for a fan fiction. I don't know exactly what happened next, but I ended up having a forty-chapter fanfic with some original twists. I'm kind of like Stephenie Meyer in that our little projects that we do "for fun" or for personal reasons turn out to be huge projects that become big hits. (In case you're interested, be warned: "Unsuspecting Love" is rated T, but should really be M.)

BTW, in case anyone is interested: I put up a challenge on my list of stories. The challenge is to write an Avatar: The Last Airbender Disney crossover for _Hercules_. There are many Disney crossovers, but no one has ever written one for _Hercules_. Let me know if you are interested!


	13. Caught

_Published October 26, 2011_

Something was dawning on me, something so strange and terrible that I had never even dreamed of it before. "You love him," I said, and I could hear the accusation in my voice.

Shahrazad looked away; the shadows cast a veil over her eyes. When she turned back, her gaze was level. "I'm not ashamed of loving him," she said. "There's nothing wrong with loving someone. It's hating – _that's_ what's wrong."

~ Susan Fletcher, _Shadow Spinner_

* * *

><p>Zuko lay on his bed with his arms folded, glaring at the metal ceiling. That confounding, infernal girl … She had no idea what he was really like.<p>

Or was it the other way around? Maybe the reason she infuriated him so much was that she knew him better than anyone else did – better than he wanted anyone to. She wasn't afraid of him, because she knew he didn't have it in him to really hurt anyone.

No one had ever taken so much effort to get to know Zuko. The fact that Katara had done so … unnerved him. Zuko was a very private person; he had learned to keep his emotions hidden away from prying eyes. But Katara, being as persistent and caring as she was, had broken through.

Unlike him, Katara always said what she thought, and she meant what she said. She was intelligent, brave, a determined fighter … she seemed likable. The truth was, it was hard not to like her. But she was allied with the Avatar, and she was so disgustingly hopeful about him …

Zuko's frustrated, wistful thoughts were interrupted by a tentative knock on his bedroom door. "Go away," Zuko growled.

The door opened, and Iroh poked his head in. He looked concerned. "Zuko –"

"I don't want to hear another word about it!" Zuko said, sitting up and glaring at his uncle.

"It's not that," Iroh said unhappily. "We have a visitor."

Frowning, Zuko swung his legs off the bed and followed Iroh out of the room. When they came to the top deck, they could see the same Fire Navy ship that they had encountered the day before – had it only been yesterday? It felt like so much had happened since then.

"Again? Really?" Zuko said.

"Perhaps something has happened," Iroh said. Zuko could tell Iroh had a bad feeling about this.

The monstrous ship pulled up parallel to Zuko's smaller ship, and Zhao's crew laid a ramp across the void between the two. Admiral Zhao himself crossed over to Zuko's ship, accompanied by three masked guards.

"Admiral Zhao. To what do we owe the honor?" Iroh said cordially. The fact that he said "honor" rather than "pleasure" did not go unnoticed.

"Bad business, General Iroh," Zhao said loftily. He glanced at the guards and gave them a sharp nod; two of them headed below deck, while the third went up the stairs to the tower.

"What do you think you're doing?" Zuko exclaimed.

"Searching your ship," Zhao replied coolly, following the guards down the stairs.

"You have no right –"

Zhao's next words made Zuko's blood run cold. "As a matter of fact, I do. You see, I received some disquieting information last night."

* * *

><p>Katara stayed lying in bed for a while after she stopped crying. She thought about trying to fall asleep, to escape from her problems for a while. But when she closed her eyes, she heard the loud footsteps of heavy boots in the metal hallway. Then someone was rapping on her door.<p>

Katara sniffed, turning on her side so was facing away from the door. "Go _away_, Zuko."

She heard the door open. She pushed herself up on her arms and turned around. Her eyes widened when she saw the two masked firebenders. Startled, she instinctively got to her feet.

She could hear Zuko exclaiming angrily. She felt a jolt of fear when she saw none other than Admiral Zhao come into the room, followed by Iroh and Zuko. Iroh looked concerned and anxious; Zuko had an expression of fury; Zhao appeared cool and smug. Zuko moved so he was between Zhao and Katara.

"Katara, is it?" Zhao nodded to her.

"How did you know I was here?" Katara's voice was low but steady.

"Your friend the Avatar told me."

"_What?_"

"He did?" Zuko was taken aback.

Zhao shrugged. "Just in passing," he said casually. "He wanted to know if I knew where you were. It's ironic, really – he wanted information from me, but instead I got information from him."

Katara groaned, pressing the palm of her hand to her forehead. Why did Aang have to give her away?

"You know all information regarding the Avatar is to go to me," Zhao said, looking at Zuko. "That includes hostages and prisoners of war."

Iroh folded his arms. "And just what are you going to do with her?" he asked, raising his eyebrow at Zhao.

"Question her, and wait for the Avatar to come for her. I'm sure he'll come, once he finds out her captor is no longer this spineless teenager. And then, I'll see if there are any of those specially-designed prisons for waterbenders still in operation."

Zuko glanced at Katara. She looked more frightened than Zuko and Iroh had ever seen her.

"She's just a child, Zhao," Iroh said quietly.

"So is the Avatar," Zhao countered. "So is your nephew."

Normally Zuko would have pulverized anyone who called him a child, but right now he had far more important things to worry about.

"Speaking of whom," Zhao said, turning to look at Zuko, "I wonder what the Fire Lord will have to say about his son's treason. Withholding information when it was explicitly required to report such a thing …"

Zuko looked even paler than usual.

Something tugged at Katara's memory; the standoff reminded her of something from the past. _If __I __go __with __you, __will __you __promise __to __leave __everyone __alone?_ That was what Aang had said the day she left the South Pole.

Zhao signaled to his guards, who started to walk toward Katara. Zuko stepped in front of her. "She's not going anywhere," he said, daring them to attack.

"Don't interfere more than you already have," Zhao said venomously. "You'll only make it worse for yourself."

"Wait." Everyone's heads turned to look at Katara. She swallowed hard before speaking to Zhao. "If I go with you quietly," she said, narrowing her eyes at Zhao, "will you promise to leave Zuko alone? And not get him in trouble for all this?"

Zhao frowned, not understanding her motive, but he slowly nodded.

"What are you doing?" Zuko hissed.

"Saving you," Katara retorted. Things were hard enough for Zuko as it was; she didn't want it to be worse for him – especially not because of her.

Zuko opened his mouth, but no sound came out. Not for the first time, he wasn't sure if she was being brave, or foolish. Did she really care about him so much that she would sacrifice herself for him?

"You're not going to win this fight," Katara told Zuko. "At least this way you don't get in trouble."

Zuko shook his head mutely. _No, Katara …_

Zhao nodded to his men, who started forward, but Zuko held his arm out protectively in front of Katara. He looked over his shoulder at the girl. "I can't let you do this," he said in a low voice.

"Zuko …" Katara's first instinct was to argue, but she was too surprised and touched.

Zhao looked at the two of them with a calculating expression. He followed Zuko's gaze to Katara, who looked at Zhao with fear and at Zuko with tenderness. Then he understood. "Oh, that's just beautiful," he said sarcastically. "A banished prince and a water peasant."

"Shut up," Katara muttered, blushing furiously.

Zhao moved as though to slap her; but Zuko blocked him, grabbing his arm and shoving him to the side.

Everything happened quickly then. Zuko pushed Katara out of harm's way as he and Zhao started to exchange blows. The masked firebenders moved to defend Zhao; Zuko and Zhao were exchanging fire; Iroh was trying to break up the fight.

"Enough!" Iroh pushed Zuko and Zhao apart. "Both of you, calm down."

Zuko glared at Zhao. "Get off my ship."

"Admiral Zhao," Iroh said, in a steely tone that Katara had never heard him use before, "as general and Prince of the Fire Nation, I must ask you to leave – without the prisoner. And I would prefer not to use force."

"Is that a threat?" Zhao demanded.

Zuko faced him head-on. "I beat you once; I can do it again. And this time, I will _not_ be merciful."

"You don't want me as your enemy," Zhao said ominously. "Remember, even a prince can be charged with treason."

Zuko opened his mouth, but then realized Zhao was right. Once again, he was violating direct orders from an officer of his country. Finally he said tonelessly, "I'm already banished." He looked off to the side. "Things can't get worse for me."

"Oh, yes they can," Zhao promised, before turning on his heel and striding out of the room, followed by the two masked soldiers.

Zuko turned to Katara, who emerged cautiously from the corner. "Are you okay?" he asked, placing a hand on her shoulder.

She nodded, her mouth set in a thin line, blinking back tears. Then she threw her arms around his neck, and Zuko found himself hugging Katara. Surprisingly, there was no awkwardness in the embrace. Zuko almost never hugged people – except maybe Iroh, and then usually it was Iroh who hugged him. But right now it felt good to hold Katara, and to feel her holding him. Good spirits, if Zhao had taken her … Zuko never would have forgiven himself, if anything bad happened to her because of him.

Katara felt safe in Zuko's arms; somewhere along the way she had come to trust him, without realizing it. She wondered if Zuko was just doing this to comfort her, to assure her that she was all right, or if he actually cared about her the way she cared about him. She decided that for the moment it didn't matter; she liked it either way.

Iroh felt a surge of pleasure and something that could have been triumph, seeing the two teenagers hold each other. It looked as though Zhao had been accurate in his observation. They looked so comforted by each other.

Katara whispered in Zuko's ear, "I knew you cared."

She felt Zuko hesitate at this, but then he shrugged and held her tighter.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: I wasn't sure how to end the confrontation with Zhao, to get him to leave without a hostage. I hope I did okay … Halloween cookies go to ArrayePL and CrazyJulz16 for correctly predicting that Zhao would come for Katara. To all my readers, Happy Halloween! I'm dressing up as Katara: I'll be wearing blue pajamas, a pair of Uggs, and my Katara necklace; and my little sister (username Jellybean-Ninja) is going to put my hair in braids and hair loopies. :)


	14. For a Moment

_Published November 7, 2011_

Yes, love indeed is light from heaven;  
>A spark of that immortal fire<br>With angels shared, by Allah given,  
>To lift from earth our low desire.<br>~ Lord Byron, _The Giaour_, "Line 1127"

* * *

><p>Aang figured Sokka must have regained his health, if he was able to complain about food. The boys hadn't had a decent meal since Katara was kidnapped. They tried experimenting with their rations and whatever roots or nuts they could find, but supplies were short since they hadn't left the earth temple ruins.<p>

"It's not too stale," Aang said in an attempt to be optimistic.

"I don't know how Katara does it," Sokka said, pushing the food around with his chopsticks. Then he put the bowl down and hugged his knees to his chest. "I miss her," Sokka said miserably. Then he added hastily, "Not just for her cooking, but, you know, just being here …"

Now that Sokka was healthy again, Aang had to tell him what he knew.

"Listen, Sokka," Aang said. "I don't want to get you too excited, after you just got better; but I have some news."

Sokka looked at him apprehensively.

"When I went to find medicine for you –"

"What, you mean that frog?" Sokka hadn't forgiven Aang for that rude awakening. "I have a wart on my throatal flap from that thing!"

Aang ignored him. "I saw where Zuko's ship is anchored."

Sokka stopped in the middle of his rant and gaped at Aang. Then he looked ecstatic. "So we know where Katara is!"

"That's right."

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Sokka demanded. "It's been twenty-four hours since then!"

"Um … you were delirious."

"Okay, so we've wasted enough time. We have to figure out how to rescue Katara." Sokka fingered his boomerang, a sly smile spreading across his face. "First thing tomorrow, we're going to pay Zuko a visit."

They left the food untouched as they discussed their plans. Aang recounted what he had seen the day Zuko took him onto his ship, over a month ago. Sokka came up with a few ideas, but there were several holes where they would have to improvise. For the first time in a week, the boys felt cheerful and purposeful. Even Appa and Momo caught on to the mood.

Aang walked to the edge of the temple and stared up at the half-moon. He was glad he could see the moon tonight; somehow it seemed to bring comfort when it was visible, no matter what size it was. Aang missed the moon when it was new or hanging out of sight. He wondered if Katara could see it from Zuko's ship, and if it strengthened her morale as well as her bending.

_Hang in there, Katara. We're coming for you._

* * *

><p>After dinner Katara wandered onto the deserted main deck. Zuko looked out from behind the doorway to the tower, debating whether or not to follow her. She seemed to be deep in thought, staring out at the moon and ocean. But she also seemed lonely, almost sad; Zuko felt something stir inside him, a need to comfort her – an unusual feeling for him.<p>

Zuko felt a hand on his shoulder, and turned to see his uncle standing next to him. "Go to her," Iroh urged him.

"And do what?"

"Talk to her."

"What am I supposed to tell her?"

"The truth," Iroh said simply. "Let her know how you feel."

Zuko laughed humorlessly. "Easier said than done, Uncle."

"True enough."

Zuko glanced at her again. _I may never have another opportunity. It's now or never._

He took a deep breath, and walked out onto the deck.

Katara was not surprised to see Zuko approach her. She had actually been hoping he might come to talk to her.

"Hey," Zuko said.

"Hey," Katara returned.

It was the friendliest greeting they had ever exchanged.

"Aren't you cold?" Zuko asked.

Katara shrugged. "I have a lot on my mind." It was true; she'd been pondering the day's events for a long time. She glanced back at him. "Thanks for … you know … what you did earlier."

"You're welcome."

Katara had always wondered about that phrase. "You're welcome." It was a kind of standard response to a thank-you, but what did it really mean? You are welcome. If you thought about it, those words were heavy. They indicated that a person accepted another.

They both looked at the water in silence. It was a beautiful night; the waxing half-moon cast a beam of light on the water, and the stars twinkled in the indigo sky. Zuko wasn't sure if the silence was awkward or companionable. For a moment they felt like exactly what they were: two uncertain teenagers experiencing their first stirrings of love.

"It was my fault, at least partly," Zuko said to break the silence. Katara looked at him in surprise; he avoided her gaze, looking instead at the dark horizon. "If I hadn't kidnapped you, you wouldn't have been in that situation."

Katara frowned, tilting her head at him. "But if you hadn't brought me here … I never would have gotten to know you."

Zuko smiled a little. Katara realized it was the first time she had seen him truly smile out of happiness, not smirk or half-smile. They looked at each other, the cerulean eyes locking with the golden-amber ones. Katara thought looking into those eyes was like staring at a campfire, mesmerizing, always-changing.

Zuko reached out and touched the side of her face. His palm rested under her ear, caressing her cheek. Katara froze, her heart pounding in her chest like a Water Tribe war drum. She thought Zuko's hands were surprisingly warm; somehow Katara had expected his pale skin to be cold to the touch. But it made sense that a firebender would be warm.

_You're kind of beautiful,_ Zuko thought. Katara blinked at him, and her mouth dropped open slightly.

Zuko froze. "Did I just say that out loud?"

Katara giggled. "Yeah, you did."

Zuko dropped his arm with a groan and looked away, mentally cursing himself. What was happening to him?

"You're kind of handsome," Katara said coyly, tilting her head toward him.

Zuko gave a soft, derisive snort.

"No, really. I mean, I'm not crazy about the ponytail, at least not when the rest of your hair is shaved off …" In fact, Katara had once thought Zuko ugly; but if he grew out his hair, and didn't glare so much, and maybe smiled more often – she could see he would be kind of cute, handsome even.

Zuko raised his one good eyebrow at her. "And this?" He gestured to the scarred side of his face.

Katara looked up at him unflinchingly, taking in the scar. She said softly, "If I'd been in that war chamber, I would have done the exact same thing."

_Yeah, right,_ Zuko thought. But when he really thought about it … he could imagine Katara protesting against the general's suggestion. She certainly had the audacity and sense of righteousness.

And here she was, telling him that she thought he had done the right thing.

Zuko reached out and slowly, carefully brushed a strand of hair out of Katara's face. His fingers stroked her cheek, brushing against her hair loopies, and trailed down her face, her neck, down to her collarbone. Her skin was so soft … He no longer could deny it, even to himself: he wanted her. He liked her. He cared about her.

Thoughts raced through Katara's mind: This was Zuko, her enemy, her protector, her captor, her friend – arrogant, sorrowful, mean, confused, selfish, lost, angry … hiding his compassion behind a wall of unfeeling that his father had helped to build …

Zuko leaned forward, and Katara closed the space between them.

There was a blend of feelings – hunger, sympathy, caution, longing, urgency, affection, sadness, a strange sense of peace – in the kiss. Zuko tried to tell Katara, without words, the things he would never dare say aloud – that he didn't like this war any more than she did; that he was sorry for everything his country had done to her; that she had made him happy for the first time in years; that he was sorry he had put her in danger; that she reminded him it was okay to care; that he _did_ care.

Zuko slowly reached up and tenderly stroked Katara's face with the back of his fingers. She hadn't known that he could be so gentle. There was so much more to him that she hadn't known before … and so much she still didn't know – and most likely would never know.

They both knew, deep down, that such a bittersweet moment was transient as the sunset. But they didn't want to ruin it – for themselves, or for each other. So neither of them voiced their concerns.

For one moonlit moment, they let themselves be happy together.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I rewrote this chapter so many times, trying to make it a beautiful scene while keeping Katara and, especially, Zuko in character. And then there were so many different ways it could go. I decided to have it be mostly happy, and save the angst for later. Let me know what you think of the final result. … I'm bracing myself for a lot of reviews, after they finally kissed.


	15. Complications

_Published November 26, 2011_

No relationship is an island: There are threads that bind us all and pull at our lives – the demands of family, of friends, of work, and social obligation. And there are times that the pull of those threads becomes greater than the strength of the relationship. In these times, no matter how much two people love each other, a relationship must grow strong or be torn apart. ~ Richard Paul Evans, jacket cover of _The Carousel_

Zuko returned belowdecks, looking slightly dazed. Katara felt too restless to go to bed; but she didn't want to stay alone on the main deck all night.

She passed the open door to the galley on the way to her room, and was surprised to see a light inside. She poked her head in and saw Iroh bustling around, preparing tea.

He glanced over at her. "Can't sleep?" Iroh said kindly.

Katara nodded as she took a seat. "I've had a lot to think about."

Iroh nodded understandingly. He poured two steaming cups of herbal tea meant to induce sleep, and set one cup in front of Katara. "Our second cup of tea," Iroh reminded her. "This means you are a friend now." He sat down across from her. "So, what's on your mind?"

Katara hesitated, unsure of where to begin.

"Never mind. I think I can guess." Iroh smiled, and Katara returned it with an effort. Then Iroh's face became serious. "I want to thank you, Katara."

She looked at him blankly. "For what?"

"Zuko's been alone for so long," Iroh explained. "Tonight was the first time in over two years that I saw him truly happy." He looked at Katara, his expression and voice sincere. "Thank you."

"… You're welcome," Katara said, sounding uncertain but no less sincere.

Iroh studied her for a moment. "Are you worried?" he asked.

"Well … yes. I mean, there's the whole situation with Zhao – I'm worried that you and Zuko will get in more trouble because of me. And then, I guess, there's teen angst … I doubt you want to listen to that."

"Hey, I was a teenager once," Iroh said. "If you want to talk, I'm willing to listen."

Katara looked at him warily. "Can I trust you? I mean, you're Zuko's uncle, and the Fire Lord's brother."

Iroh held up his right hand in an oath. "I swear by the dragons, I won't repeat anything you tell me."

Katara sighed, folding her arms. "All right. … I'm scared." Katara's voice was almost a whisper. "I'm afraid I'm in too deep now. We care about each other, and that'll just make it harder when I have to leave. And then, if we have to fight each other in the future – well, it would be too distracting. Whenever I would see Zuko, I wouldn't know whether to hug him or attack him. Even if we, I don't know, met in secret to go on dates, I wouldn't be able to trust him to not follow me to see where Aang is. " Katara shook her head. "As long as Zuko continues tracking Aang, a relationship with him just isn't feasible."

She paused. Then, not waiting for a prompt from Iroh, Katara continued, "I'm also scared of how my brother and the Avatar will react, if they find out about this. Aang is my best friend; admitting that I love his enemy could destroy our friendship. I'd hate to lose him. Plus, Aang has been through so much lately, I don't want to make things worse for him."

"What do you mean?" Iroh asked.

Katara hesitated, unsure if she should share something so personal concerning her friend. But she wanted him to understand. "Aang didn't know about the war when he came out of the iceberg. He didn't know all the Air Nomads had been killed. When he found out … I can barely imagine how devastating it was for him. He lost his people, his family – everyone he loved. I told him that Sokka and I were his family now." Katara looked up at Iroh, her cerulean eyes pleading him for understanding. "I can't turn my back on my family. Aang is my responsibility."

Iroh nodded gravely. "I see."

"And my brother …" Katara tilted her head, wincing a little. "He's my guardian, since our mom died and our dad is fighting in the war. He would never admit it, but he's kind of protective of me. I think it would be hard for him to see me fall in love for the first time, no matter who it was. But with Zuko …" She trailed off and shook her head. When she spoke, she sounded pained. "How could I tell him I've fallen for the enemy? That I'm in love with the Prince of the Nation who killed our mother?" Katara's lower lip trembled.

They sat in silence for a long moment. Then Iroh said, "Now I see what you meant. I can't argue your logic."

"But on the other hand," Katara went on, "there's the matter of how Zuko will feel when I leave. If Aang and Sokka show up, either to surrender or to rescue me … if I go with them … I'm afraid I'll hurt Zuko. Like you said, he's been so miserable, and then suddenly I show up … and then I leave …" Katara looked utterly lost. "You know what we were arguing about yesterday? I was trying to get him to admit that he cares about me. And now he finally has – I mean, he saved me, and then we kissed. If I leave, he'll feel betrayed. I don't want to hurt him – but I don't want to hurt my friends, either. So no matter what I do, I'll hurt someone I love."

Iroh sipped his tea thoughtfully. Then he set his cup down and said, "Remember the first time we played Pai Sho together?"

Katara looked at him blankly. For a moment she wondered whether he had been listening to a word she had said.

"If you'll recall, I suggested a different move that you could make, but either way you would end up losing a tile. This is much the same."

An incredulous smile flickered briefly across Katara's face. "Wow. You're good."

"What if Zuko gave up his search for the Avatar?" Iroh said suddenly.

Katara looked startled. For a moment, Iroh could have sworn he saw hope in her eyes. Then she shook her head sadly. "One thing I know about Zuko is that he doesn't give up. Like you said, he's passionate, driven to achieve his goals. don't think I could ask Zuko to do that. It's the only thing that will get him his honor and allow him to go home. And even if he wasn't … well, we're trying to dethrone his father. He won't want to betray his family, his country, any more than I want to betray mine. If Aang wins, then Zuko will lose his father. If the Fire Lord wins, then I'll lose my best friend." Katara shook her head. "We'll only end up hurting each other, one way or another."

They sat in silence for a minute, sipping their tea. Then Katara said heavily, "I want what's best for him, but I need to do what's best for the world. You understand that, don't you?"

Iroh hated seeing Katara like this – but he didn't know how he could console her. "I flatter myself that I give good advice," he said. "But I don't know what to tell you. I can't tell you what the right thing to do is," Iroh began.

But Katara shook her head. "I _know_ what the right thing is. It's just not the thing that would be best for Zuko."

They lapsed into silence. Iroh tried to start again. "I think now you need to decide what you are going to do," he said seriously.

Katara looked slightly surprised. Then she bowed her head. "I haven't changed my plans at all. The other option is … intriguing, but I'm sticking with what I was going to do in the first place."

"You mustn't think that nothing has changed," Iroh told her. "You've helped Zuko, more than you know."

Suddenly, Katara remembered something her grandmother had told her the day she left the South Pole. _With __his __mastery __of __the __four __elements, __the __Avatar __will __begin __to __change __hearts. __And __it __is __in __the__heart __that __all __wars __are __won._

Could that be true of her and Zuko? Had she changed him enough to change the course of the war? Probably only time could tell.

Katara laughed a little. "And to think, none of this would have happened if I hadn't stolen that waterbending scroll! Who would have thought that all this would happen because of it?"

"Destiny is strange that way," Iroh said knowingly. "A simple purchase, a small gesture, a word of kindness, all can have unforeseen effects."

Katara didn't respond. She sipped her tea thoughtfully. Was this part of her destiny? Or had the kiss just been a fluke?

She put her now empty cup down. "Maybe I'm over-thinking all of this. I'm only fourteen; I'm probably going to have other relationships in the future." She stood up. "Thanks for the tea and sympathy."

"Any time, Katara. And … I hope this isn't our last cup of tea together."

Katara paused, remembering. _On __the __third __cup, __you __become __family_. "You hope I'll be family?" she said quizzically.

Iroh just smiled and turned his back to her as he put away the tea service.

* * *

><p>Zuko hadn't planned on eavesdropping. He had been on his way to his room when he heard Iroh talking to Katara. He had hesitated, wondering whether or not to join them, when he heard his name spoken. Then he stood rooted to the spot, and found himself listening to their entire conversation. He finally came to his senses when they finished, and managed to duck out of sight before they came out.<p>

In the safety of his room, Zuko sighed and flung himself backwards onto the bed. He stared up at the metal ceiling.

Something Iroh had told him, the day he captured Katara, rang in his ears. _The only thing better than finding something you are looking for is finding something you weren't looking for._ Strange that he should think of it now. Zuko hadn't appreciated the proverb at the time; but now it seemed to apply to his situation. He had looked for the Avatar, but instead he found Katara. He had looked for honor, but instead found love.

But then, was finding Katara's love better than finding the thing that would earn him his father's love?

Zuko turned on his side. _Is __love __always __this __complicated?_ That was a question worthy of asking his uncle. Somehow, Zuko doubted that the answer was yes. This whole situation was so complex – right and wrong were all mixed up – there were so many things working against him being with Katara.

Listening to Katara list her reasons why she couldn't be with him, had only increased his love and admiration for her. She was so considerate and selfless and loyal.

It wasn't as though he was surprised by what he had overheard. Even when he kissed her, Zuko had known that they couldn't be together. Nevertheless, it had hurt to hear her spell out the reasons so clearly.

_We'll __only __end __up __hurting __each __other_.

Katara cared about the Avatar so much – how much pain would it cause her when Zuko eventually delivered the Avatar to his father?

He supposed that he should be pleased that she was trying to steel herself for the inevitable. She understood his reasons for capturing the Avatar. Of course, that didn't mean she wouldn't try to stop him. But at least she accepted the situation for what it was.

Still, that didn't make it any less painful, for either of them.

**Disclaimer:** The line "Thanks for the tea and sympathy" is from _Harry __Potter __and __the __Half-Blood __Prince_ by J.K. Rowling.


	16. All I Ask of You

_Published December 19, 2011_

Song: "Think of Me" from _The Phantom of the Opera_, the musical by Andrew Lloyd Webber; and "All I Ask of You is Forever to Remember Me as Loving You," a hymn by Gregory Norbert

* * *

><p>"Perhaps we shall soon meet on the field of battle; but in the meantime we shall part good friends, I hope."<p>

"Yes, my Lord; but with the hope of soon becoming enemies."

~ Alexandre Dumas, _The __Three __Musketeers_

* * *

><p>Katara had no sense of time in the morning, unable to see where the sun was in the sky. But she thought it must be later than when Iroh usually called her down for breakfast. Maybe he was letting her sleep in after being up so late the night before.<p>

Katara turned on her side, wondering what it would be like when she saw Zuko today. Would there be any real change in his behavior? What would she say to him?

She closed her eyes. _I __can't __give __him __false __hope. __I __have __to __be __straightforward_.

There was a knock on her door – more tentative than when Iroh summoned her. "Katara?" It was Zuko.

"Yes?"

"Um … I need to talk to you."

This was different. Why didn't he just come in? It was his ship after all. "I can't unlock the door," she reminded him as she got out of bed.

"Right." There was a pause as Zuko turned the cog to unlock and open the door. It seemed Zuko had dismissed her guards for the moment, as only Zuko was there.

"Hi," Katara said.

"Hi," Zuko responded. "Um … do you want to get breakfast? I think everyone else is done."

"Sure." She let him lead the way. An awkward silence lingered as they walked down the metal hallways.

For a moment Katara considered holding his hand, but she decided to keep their respectful distance. She caught a glimpse of the sky outside as the passed the bottom of the tower. "It's foggy out," she commented.

The weather. Not the most original choice of topics, but to break the uneasy tension, anything would do. "Yeah, it's weird. It just kind of came out of nowhere, early this morning."

They found Iroh still in the galley. "You missed breakfast," Iroh informed them. "But I think you can still find some food."

Katara sat down at the table, but Zuko stayed standing. "Uncle," Zuko said, trying to keep his tone civil, "I wanted to have a word alone with Katara."

"Oh." Iroh frowned, understanding. "Oh, of course. I'll just … see how the tournament's going." He clasped his hands in his sleeves and left the room.

More awkward silence.

"So … what did you want to talk about?"

"I …" Zuko sat down on Katara's right, on the side of the table perpendicular to her side. "I need to tell you something."

Katara looked at him, waiting. When Zuko hesitated, she started to feel anxious. _Is __he __going __to __say __he __loves __me? __That __he'll __stop __hunting __Aang?_

Finally he blurted out, "I heard you talking to my uncle last night."

Katara stared at him in shock. Zuko said hurriedly, "I couldn't sleep and I heard you go to the kitchen, and I thought I'd join you, and I heard you talking to Uncle Iroh, and I –" He realized he didn't have a good reason for having eavesdropped.

Now Katara looked worried. "How long were you there?"

Zuko rubbed the back of his neck, looking embarrassed. "I think I heard most of your conversation," he confessed.

Katara groaned and buried her face in her hands. When she looked up, her eyes were shining with tears. "I'm sorry you had to hear that," she whispered.

"You don't have to apologize," Zuko said. "Everything you said was true."

They sat in silence for a moment, unsure of what to say next.

"So … you know nothing's changed – in one sense," Katara said. Everything had changed, in terms of how they felt about each other; but their sides and loyalties had remained the same. "It'll be like it was before. You'll do what you have to do; and I'll do what I have to do."

Zuko nodded solemnly.

"I made a commitment to Aang, and I have to see it through." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "I'll miss you," she offered.

Zuko regarded her warily. "But I'll see you again. I'm not going to stop hunting the Avatar, so the next time we catch up …" He trailed off suggestively.

"If you try to capture Aang," Katara said, trying to sound assertive, "I won't hesitate to attack you."

"The feeling's mutual."

Katara raised her eyebrows at him. "That was an interesting choice of words."

Zuko looked embarrassed, but he tried to disguise it as annoyance. "You know what I mean."

She did. The feeling _was_ mutual.

_I __really __like __you,_ Katara thought. _I __think __I __could __love __you, __if __we __gave __this __some __time_. But they didn't have time.

"Will you do me a favor?" she asked tentatively.

Zuko set his jaw. "I'm not going to stop chasing the Avatar."

"That's not what I was going to ask."

"What, then?"

Katara paused, looking him straight in the eye. "Remember me."

Zuko blinked.

"Years from now, if and when you're Fire Lord, remember the Water Tribe peasant who had every reason to hate you, but actually cared about you. Remember the girl who encouraged you when you felt hopeless, who healed you when you burned yourself. Remember what I said about caring." She looked at him. "Then I'll know … this didn't all happen for nothing."

Zuko looked at her. "Of course I won't forget you," he said. Katara wasn't the kind of person you could forget, even in normal circumstances.

"You do realize," Zuko said roughly, "that you're the only friend I have?"

Katara stared at him for a moment, before looking away. "We're not even supposed to be friends," she murmured. "We're supposed to be enemies."

"That's just it." Zuko grabbed her arm; she looked up at him, slightly startled. "If you don't want to be – my girlfriend, or whatever, that's one thing. But I don't think I could stand to lose you as a friend."

Katara didn't answer right away. She didn't know how to respond.

She sighed. "What happened last night …" Katara hesitated. "I never thought something like that would happen. But, for what it's worth, I'm glad it did."

Zuko half-smiled. "Me too."

* * *

><p>Aang had started creating fog in the early morning, before dawn. Now the mist obscured Zuko's ship in the distance. Aang and Sokka were hoping it would provide cover for them when they broke in.<p>

"How d'you feel?" Sokka asked. "Anxious? Excited? Scared out of your wits?"

"Yeah, that pretty much sums it up," Aang admitted. "I can't wait to see Katara again."

They left Appa on shore, from where they could make out Zuko's ship in the distance.

"Be ready to come when we call you," Aang said, patting the bison's flank. Appa let out a low growl. "Momo, do as Appa says. And when we call, be ready to swoop in as a distraction."

"Deus ex Appa," Sokka joked. Aang looked at him blankly. "See, _deus __ex __machina_ means, like, someone swooping in to save the day. And that's what Appa might have to do …" Sokka made a face. "It's not as funny if I have to explain the joke."

Aang shrugged and walked down to the shoreline. Sokka waved good-bye to the animals and followed him.

"Are we sure we can do this?" Sokka said apprehensively, looking out at the water.

"We have to," Aang answered seriously. He held up his staff, popping out the glider wings. "Ready?" he said, getting into position.

Sokka grimaced. "I prefer flying on Appa, but I'll survive." Aang bent his knees, and Sokka got on to the back of the glider. "Um, yip-yip?"

Aang laughed. "No need." He took a running start toward the water and then took off. He had to ascend a bit at first, but then he tried to stay within a few meters of the ocean surface. Sokka tried to look ahead rather than at the water rushing below them.

Then they were ascending, and suddenly Sokka saw metal rushing toward them. He bit his lip to keep from screaming as they flew straight up, came over the railing and landed on the metal deck.

"Are you okay?" Aang asked as he bent down under his glider.

"It could have been smoother, but then, it could have been rougher," Sokka commented, getting off the contraption. Aang closed up his glider, and they looked around.

They were at the tail end of the ship, behind the tower. The fog seemed to have done its job; no one had seen them come on board.

There was a porthole in the wall on this side of the tower. Sokka, the taller of the two boys, stood up on his toes and tried to see inside.

Sokka covered his mouth with his hand, trying to keep from crying out. There she was! And – there was Zuko. The two of them were sitting together at a wooden table. Zuko's back faced Sokka. Katara was sitting on Zuko's left hand, so Sokka could see her profile. Katara fiddled nervously with her necklace.

_Hold __on_. Hadn't she lost her necklace? And now she had it again? How? Sokka made a mental note to ask her about it later.

He saw Katara reach out as though to touch Zuko's arm, but then she hesitated and drew her hand back.

Okay … that was weird.

Sokka continued to watch for a moment. Katara's expression was guarded, a bit apprehensive – which made sense considering who she was talking to. Then she bowed her head, her face melting with some new emotion.

Sokka knew that look. She was trying not to cry.

He saw Zuko reach out and put his hand over Katara's. She looked up at him, and seemed to be listening to something he said; a moment later she nodded.

What in the world was going on?

Overall, they looked … comforting? Intimate? He didn't know how to describe it.

He saw Zuko grab Katara's arm and force her to look at him. Sokka felt anger rising in his chest. He didn't like how close they were. But Katara didn't look upset about it.

He had a lot of questions for Katara, once they rescued her. Unless he was able to kill Zuko first. But he knew that wasn't the point of the mission; they had to focus on the immediate task at hand.

"Should we go in?" Aang whispered.

Sokka bent down again and shook his head. "I say we stick to the plan. That way we can get the angry jerk away from Katara, so we won't have to deal directly with him."

"Tell me what to do."

Sokka looked up and spotted the ladder that ran up the tower. The bridge was still broken from the storm. It led to the catwalk outside the control room. Sokka could see the wheel in there.

Sokka gestured for Aang to follow him, around the corner, into the tower and up the stairs. Aang kept his staff at the ready, but by some stroke of luck they didn't encounter anyone on the stairs.

The door to the control room was closed. "Ready?" Sokka said, placing his hands on the strange-looking door handle. Aang nodded, and Sokka pushed the door open.

It wasn't hard for Aang to incapacitate the few people in the control room; they clearly weren't expecting a sudden attack. The boys pulled the unconscious soldiers – actually, one of them looked like an officer – to the side of the room. "Think they'll be okay?" Aang asked, looking concerned.

Sokka shrugged indifferently. "They'll live." Aang didn't look any happier with this response. "It had to be done, Aang. Step One is complete," he said confidently.

"Great," Aang said with a smile. "So – what's Step Two?"

"Watch and learn," Sokka said masterfully. Aang watched as the warrior picked up the intercom microphone on the desk. "Attention," Sokka said in a deep voice. "We are experiencing engine difficulties. All firebenders please report to the engine room."

Aang looked impressed, but also concerned. "Think they'll fall for that?"

"If they don't, they'll be suspicious, so they'll come up here, to see who's commandeering the ship. And if they do, we'll be ready."

"Nice." Aang's tone was appreciative.

"I'd still like to dress up and impersonate a Fire Nation soldier," Sokka said wistfully.

"Maybe someday you will," Aang said cheerfully.

* * *

><p>They could hear the announcement in the galley. "<em>Attention. <em>_We __are __experiencing __engine __difficulties. __All __firebenders __please __report __to __the __engine __room_."

Zuko frowned. "Something's not right," he said.

"What is it?" Katara asked.

Zuko didn't answer. He stood up and grabbed Katara's wrist, pulling her behind him as he left the room. Katara didn't resist.

He took her back to her room. "Zuko –" Katara started.

"Stay here, until I say you can come out," Zuko instructed. Then he closed the door and turned the gear lock into place. Katara could hear him talking to two soldiers, instructing them to guard her door.

Instead of going to the engine room below, Zuko went up the stairs to the control room. Iroh passed him on the way, and followed him up the tower.

"Who gave that command?" Zuko demanded as he entered the room. Then he frowned, realizing the room was empty. He walked forward, and saw that Jee and the navigator were slumped on the floor, unconscious.

So someone had been there.

Then a vaguely familiar voice spoke up. "See ya, loser!"

Zuko pivoted and barely caught a glimpse of the Water Tribe boy before he slammed the door shut and turned the lock, trapping the firebenders in the tower.

"No!" Zuko sprang to the door and pounded on the metal, but it was too late.

"Zuko –" Iroh began.

"_They're __getting __away!_" Zuko yelled. This was what the plan had been all along – to get the Avatar. Now he was within reach; it would be too harshly ironic if he escaped now!

* * *

><p>The hallway was deserted, except for two guards standing outside a metal doorway. They started when they saw the boys. "Hey!"<p>

"It's them!"

"Oh, you're expecting us?" Sokka said sarcastically.

The soldiers held up their spears, ready to attack. But Aang leapt forward with his staff, blocking and parrying their offenses. Sokka slid along the wall past the combatants. Having figured out how to do and undo the metal lock up in the tower, Sokka found it easier to unlock Katara's room; just seconds later he threw the door open.

A girl in Water Tribe clothes cried out in surprise, backing away from the door.

"Katara!" Sokka exclaimed.

She gaped at him. "Sokka?"

"You're alive!"

Katara blinked. "Am I? Really?" She put her hand over her heart; then she grinned. "Well, what do you know?"

"Ha!" The two siblings embraced. Sokka had wanted to ask her about what went on with Zuko just before, but now he felt too overwhelmed. He hadn't realized just how much he had missed his sister.

"Katara!" It was Aang, standing in the doorway.

"Aang!" Katara pulled him into the group hug. For a moment the three of them stood together, glad that their group was whole again. "I missed you guys," Katara murmured, feeling a tear trickle down her face.

"And we missed you." Aang took a step back, pulling something out of his shirt. Katara recognized the bison whistle he had purchased the day before she was captured. Aang took a deep breath and blew into the whistle – but no audible sound came out.

Katara looked at him uncertainly. "Um, Aang …"

"It works!" he exclaimed.

"We have to go, now," Sokka said seriously, stepping back into the hallway. Aang followed him, holding up his staff.

Katara started to follow them; then she paused. "Wait just a minute!" she said, going back into the room.

"We don't have a minute!" Sokka exclaimed.

Katara came out again. "Okay – let's go." They hurried past the semi-conscious guards lying on the floor in the hallway.

"You're going the wrong way," Katara called out to the boys. "The main deck is upstairs –"

The three of them came to a halt, seeing several more Fire Nation soldiers coming up their way.

"Run!" The three teens turned on their heals and ran. The boys followed Katara up to the main deck.

"Aang, can you carry all three of us on your glider?" Katara asked, glancing over her shoulder and seeing the other soldiers come up onto the outer deck.

Suddenly they heard an animalistic roar. Aang grinned. "No need."

They were still running, until they had reached the prow of the metal ship. Slightly panicked, Katara turned around and saw that the soldiers were halfway across the deck; but suddenly they stopped short. Katara turned around again to see what they were looking at.

A bison was emerging from the fog, coming toward the prow. Katara's whole face lit up with joy. "Appa!"

"Jump!" Aang shouted to his friends. They pushed themselves up over the railing as Appa passed directly under them; they landed rather unceremoniously on his saddle.

The three friends exchanged glances. Then Sokka whooped. "We did it!"

"Ha!" Katara slapped him a high-five.

"I knew a bison whistle would come in handy," Aang said triumphantly. "Thanks, Appa."

"Yeah, we owe you one," Sokka agreed.

"Will they shoot us down?" Katara wondered, looking behind them at the ship.

"Nah, they'll probably miss us in this fog. By the way, props on making it, Aang," Sokka said casually.

Katara's eyes widened. "No way. You did that – with waterbending?"

"All part of the plan," Aang said, folding his arms and smiling triumphantly.

There was something she'd wanted to say since the night she was kidnapped. "Guys, I owe you an apology. Especially you, Aang."

The boys looked at her in surprise. Katara looked down at her lap, speaking to Aang. "You were so good at waterbending without even trying … I got so competitive that I put us all in danger."

Aang frowned. "Wait – are you talking about the waterbending scroll?"

"Yes. That's what started this whole mess. If I hadn't stolen the scroll, the pirates wouldn't have come after us. And I caused the two of you a lot of worry, getting captured and everything … I'm sorry."

"It's okay Katara."

She forced a smile. "Besides, who needs that stupid scroll anyway?"

"Oh really?" Sokka said slyly. "Then you wouldn't care that I have … this?" He pulled the scroll out of his bag with a flourish.

Katara's eyes widened. "The scroll!" she gasped. She started to reach for it, but Sokka pulled it away.

"First, what have you learned?" he asked patiently.

"Stealing is wrong," Katara said seriously. Sokka smiled and held the scroll out for her. Katara took it and grinned. "Unless it's from pirates."

Aang laughed. "Good one, Katara." It felt great to have her back.

* * *

><p>The non-firebending soldiers were able to unlock the door to the command tower, releasing the two members of the Royal Family.<p>

"Well?" Zuko glared at the soldiers who had had to fight the Avatar.

"Sir … the Avatar and his accomplices escaped." The soldier who spoke up didn't have a face mask; they could see his tentative, frightened expression as he addressed the prince.

Zuko pushed past him, shouting something incomprehensible. He felt so _stupid_. He had let his guard down, he hadn't been prepared for an attempted rescue …

Iroh followed Zuko down the stairs of the tower, to the rooms on the lower deck. Zuko and Iroh turned a corner, then stopped short.

The guards were on the floor, semi-conscious. The door to Katara's room was ajar.

Iroh knelt down to check the soldiers. But Zuko approached the door and pushed it open.

The room was empty, of course.

Katara was gone.

This bothered Zuko just as much as losing the Avatar.

Zuko stood and gazed around the sparse room. The bed was unmade, but something about it caught his attention. There was something blue lying on the red pillow. Zuko crossed the room to look.

It was Katara's necklace.

Zuko picked it up delicately, stunned, his mind slowly processing everything. Katara had realized that she must leave; and she had very deliberately laid out the necklace, leaving it behind for him to find.

Why?

It was her last physical connection to her mother. It was an heirloom, something she should be able to pass on to her descendants. Why was she giving it back to him?

Did she mean it as an apology, or a kind of peace offering? Or had she just wanted him to have something of hers – maybe to remember her by?

_Remember __me_. That had been her only request. Not a renouncement of his search or a promise to love her forever. Just reassurance that he wouldn't forget her.

Iroh came in and found Zuko kneeling on the floor, his head bowed, holding Katara's necklace in the palm of his hand. "She's gone," Zuko said flatly. "She's gone."

"I'm sorry," Iroh said sympathetically.

Zuko shook his head. There was nothing to be sorry about, he told himself. "I know how it is. I was fooling myself, thinking it could be otherwise."

He realized that he hadn't said good-bye. He knew it was a silly thing to want, but still.

Then again, she had been saying good-bye all along – he just hadn't wanted to listen.

Nothing had changed.

Everything had changed.

Zuko wasn't going to look for her – not her specifically. But he would find her, nevertheless. And if capturing the Avatar required capturing her as well … so be it.

He didn't keep the necklace in his pocket, or put it under his pillow, or wear it around his wrist like a bracelet.

Instead he tucked it in his drawer, out of sight, but safe. It would be there when he needed it.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's <strong>**Note:** It was hard getting this chapter ready to post. For one thing, Zuko and Katara's conversation was tricky. I wanted it to be meaningful but not too emotional (if that makes sense). And then, there were different ways Sokka and Aang could infiltrate the ship. Anyway … I probably won't update this story until after the New Year (since I want to post some oneshots and finish up my "Last Misérables" story by then), so I'll say it now: Merry Christmas, and happy New Year! God bless!


	17. The Necklace

_Published January 4, 2012_

I feel like I owe him something, and I hate owing people. Maybe if I had thanked him at some point, I'd be feeling less conflicted now. I thought about it a couple of times, but the opportunity never seemed to present itself. And now it never will. Because we're going to be thrown into an arena to fight to the death. Exactly how am I supposed to work in a thank-you in there? Somehow it just won't seem sincere if I'm trying to slit his throat. ~ Suzanne Collins, _The Hunger Games_

* * *

><p>They traveled for hours that day, going inland while still heading north, trying to put as much distance as possible between themselves and the Fire Prince.<p>

"So, did you learn anything about Zuko or the Fire Nation while you were there?" Sokka asked. "Like, their plans or any useful information?"

Katara hesitated. She had learned that the Fire Nation soldiers were people too, but Sokka probably wouldn't believe that or think it a valuable piece of information. She had learned the truth about Zuko's past and his motivation for capturing Aang, but telling them about that would feel like she was betraying Zuko's trust. She had learned about herself … there was something.

"I found out that I have healing abilities."

Sokka looked curious. "And you found this out … how?"

"I … kind of challenged Zuko to a duel."

Aang goggled at her. "No way! You and Zuko?"

"Who won?" Sokka asked.

"Zuko. I burned my hands, but then I put them in water, and they healed themselves."

"Zuko burned you?" Sokka said sharply.

"Um …" Katara rubbed the back of her neck, where the clasp of her necklace used to be. "It was kind of an accident?"

"That _jerk_," Sokka muttered.

Katara searched her mind for something else, something that would be safe to share. "Okay, here's something that you'll like: I found out that some firebenders can control lightning."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh. During the storm, I saw Zuko's uncle Iroh do it."

"Oh – about the storm." Aang looked down at the saddle. "I'm sorry we didn't rescue you then."

"Don't even think about it!" Katara said kindly. "You had your hands full already. And you couldn't attack with the whole crew there."

"Thanks, I guess … We should probably land soon. It's been a while since Appa flew a long distance," Aang said, patting the bison's head.

An hour later they landed on the shore of a lake, not far from the edge of a forest.

"It feels good to walk on land again," Katara said as she got down from the bison. "This is great – we even have a place to practice waterbending."

Sokka hopped down to the ground. "Hey Aang, could you look around for firewood?"

Aang frowned. "Do I have to?"

"The sooner you get firewood," Sokka said coaxingly, "the sooner Katara can make us dinner."

Aang brightened up and went off to scour the forest line for wood. Katara and Sokka started setting up camp.

"So, you come to rescue me, and the first thing out of your mouth is, 'You're alive.'" Katara looked at Sokka expectantly.

"Well – you could have been dead, for all I knew," Sokka said defensively. "I didn't know what kind of captor Zuko'd be."

"Well, I'm alive, and not tortured or anything."

Sokka took a deep breath. "Listen, Katara … I didn't want to ask in front of Aang …"

Katara frowned and looked at her brother, waiting.

"Did Zuko – you know – _try_ anything with you?" Sokka asked in a low voice.

"No!" Katara's response was too fast, too emphatic, too defensive. Her cheeks reddened.

Sokka looked hard at his sister. "I saw you two talking, right before we made that phony announcement."

"'Talking' is a loose term," Katara said loftily. "He tried interrogating me from the start." Before he could ask, Katara added, "I didn't tell him anything, but … he deduced that we're going to the North Pole, to find a waterbending teacher."

Sokka was silent. Katara thought he must be considering whether Zuko having that knowledge posed a threat. But apparently, his mind was still on Zuko himself.

"He's not even that good-looking," Sokka said frankly.

"Sokka!"

"What? Aside from the obvious – his scar – most of his hair is shaved off, and his face is so sharp –"

"Do you think I only like people for how they look?" Katara asked indignantly.

Sokka did a double take. "So you do like him!" Katara couldn't tell if his tone was triumphant or accusatory.

"Sokka, can you please drop it? If it makes you feel better, we can pretend this never happened."

They looked at each other for a long moment.

"Don't give me that look," Sokka said heatedly.

"What look?"

"That 'Sokka is paranoid' look. It's the same look you gave me when we first met Aang."

"Well, you _were_ wrong about him being Fire Nation," Katara pointed out.

Sokka gave an exasperated sigh. Could he really be blamed for wondering, or even for worrying? Katara was young and – not naïve, really, but – inexperienced. If someone flirted with her, she would most likely encourage them – not knowing where it could lead. She might not even notice the difference between a friendly gesture and a flirtatious move.

They dropped the subject because Aang was returning with firewood. Sokka seemed to take Katara's answer for the truth; at least, he didn't press her any further.

Katara and Aang spent the afternoon studying the waterbending scroll and practicing in the lake. Katara couldn't contain her joy of waterbending freely. And now, she didn't get upset when Aang tried to help her with the techniques.

When evening came and the shadows grew longer, Katara got a fire going and set about making a meal – her first time cooking in a week.

"I'm glad you're back," Sokka said later, digging into a hot meal.

"Tell us to do something," Aang said eagerly.

Katara blinked at him. "Um … be more specific when you ask a question."

"Yes, ma'am."

Sokka spoke up. "He means, like, sit up straight, don't chew with your mouth full, help out with cleanup …"

Katara raised an eyebrow at the boys. "Are you saying I'm bossy?"

"Yeah – that's what holds us together," Sokka said, staving off an argument.

Katara looked hard at the two boys. Then she smiled and laughed, for the first time in a long time. Then all three of them were laughing. Momo chittered and perched on Katara's shoulder. "Hey Momo," Katara said, scratching the lemur's head. "I missed you, too. So, how did you do while I was gone?"

Aang and Sokka exchanged glances.

"Ah, y'know – same old, same old," Sokka said nonchalantly.

Aang snickered. "Well, let me see. We led two feuding tribes through the Great Divide, fought off Canyon Crawlers, and got caught in a storm. I went into the Avatar State, and Sokka got sick, and then –" Aang stopped short. He hadn't told Sokka about his capture, much less his rescue.

"Well, then we rescued you," Sokka finished.

They talked late into the night, watching as the sun set over the trees, shedding golden light on the lake before them, and the stars gradually became visible. To say that being reunited lifted their spirits would be an understatement. But it all seemed so normal – it was almost as though no time had passed.

Katara yawned. "You want me to give an order?"

"Sure!"

"It's late; we need to get some sleep."

The boys groaned, but they complied.

Katara snuggled into her fur-lined sleeping bag – so much softer than the cotton sheets and thin mattresses they had on Zuko's ship. The musty smell of the furs mingled with the scent of their campfire and the pine leaves all around them. Hearing the two boys and two animals breathing next to her, Katara felt like she was home again. She smiled contentedly and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

><p>The most frustrating thing for Sokka was having Katara back (and able to cook), but not having many provisions for good meals.<p>

Seeing a large green fish leap out of the lake was more than he could take.

"He is taunting us," he stated. "You are so gonna be dinner!" He grabbed the fishing pole and tried to cast it into the lake, but to no effect. Katara giggled, happy to be witnessing Sokka's usual antics again.

"Hey, where's the fishing line?"

"Oh, I didn't think you would need it, Sokka." Aang held up a small item.

Sokka took the fishing line from Aang, looking at it disparagingly. "Ah, it's all tangled!"

"Not tangled, woven. I made you a necklace Katara. I thought since you lost your other one …" Aang trailed off, smiling shyly and looking anywhere except at her.

Katara smiled. "Thanks Aang. I love it."

Sokka frowned, his attention temporarily diverted from the fish. "Hold on. I thought I saw you wearing Mom's necklace, when we rescued you from Zuko's ship. And now you don't have it?"

Katara thought fast. "No, I didn't have it then. I lost it when we rescued Haru and the other earthbenders, and I haven't had it since then." The lie came to her more easily than she had expected. Still, Sokka furrowed his brow at her, puzzled and slightly suspicious.

Katara changed the subject by putting on the necklace Aang had made her. "So, how do I look?" she asked, posing somewhat dramatically.

Aang blushed and stammered. "You mean all of you or just your neck? I mean, because both look great."

"Smoochie, smoochie! Somebody's in love!" Sokka teased, before turning his attention back to the fish.

Katara froze. Did Sokka suspect … no, he couldn't. She tried to regain her composure.

"I, well …" Aang stammered.

"Stop teasing him, Sokka," Katara said firmly. "Aang's just a good friend. A sweet little guy. Just like Momo."

"Thanks," Aang said; the other two didn't know if his response sounded more sad or sarcastic.

It might have been nice to have a couple peaceful days, time to relax after so many ordeals. But apparently, fate had other plans for them – a phrase with double meaning.

Katara didn't try to explain to the boys why she wanted to know her fortune. She just felt that with so much uncertainty in their lives, it would be nice to know some of what the future had in store for them.

_The only constant is change_. The aphorism came, unbidden, back into Katara's mind.

She tried – and barely succeeded – to contain her excitement as Aunt Wu examined the lines on her palm. She tried to sound casual while asking a burning question. "So, do you see anything interesting in my love line?"

Aunt Wu's face was shining as she caressed Katara's hand. "I feel great romance for you. The man you're going to marry."

Katara leaned forward eagerly. "Tell me more!"

"I can see that he is a very powerful bender."

Katara gasped. She couldn't stop the thought from entering her mind.

_Zuko is a powerful bender._

Aunt Wu wasn't finished. "But …"

"But what?" Katara felt her stomach sinking.

"I see looming obstacles – some you know already, but several of them still to come. Many forces will work against your union – some external, and some internal."

Katara was confused. Her head was spinning as the trio left Aunt Wu's house.

And, unbeknownst to Katara, hers was not the only one.

Aang wasn't sure what to make of Katara's fortune. His initial reaction, when he heard that her husband would be a "powerful bender," was glee. But the next part, about "forces working against them" – what did that mean?

Did it refer to his destiny as the Avatar? Maybe it _would_ be hard to juggle keeping balance in the world with having a family. But Avatars could get married – Monk Gyatso had said so, that past Avatars had been married and have children.

Aang had been harboring feelings for Katara since the day they met. But now, for the first time, he decided to try acting on them.

As it turned out, he wasn't the only one having trouble with love.

"You don't like me, do you?" Meng asked him dejectedly.

Aang blinked. "Of course I like you."

"But not the way I like you."

New realization dawned on him. "Oh … I guess not."

What irony. No wonder Katara hadn't noticed him that way. It was easier than he'd realized, not to notice that someone likes you.

Somehow, that made him less frustrated about the situation.

"It's okay," Meng said. "It's just really hard when you like someone, but they don't think of you that way."

"I know what you mean," Aang said sadly. That was one thing he and Meng had in common.

"You're lucky, though. At least you get to be with her. It never would have worked for us, anyway – I live here, and you're running around the world," Meng said wistfully.

"Don't worry," Aang encouraged her. "You're going to meet a great guy who will completely fall for you."

"Thanks."

Aang started to turn away. "Wait! Don't you want this?" Meng pulled something out of her robe – the cloud book – and handed it to Aang.

"How did you know?"

Meng wrung her hands nervously. "I've … kind of been stalking you?" She offered him a sheepish smile.

Aang blushed. "Oh – thanks. I guess."

Maybe stalking was part of courting. But it seemed to contradict the advice Sokka had given him earlier. _"If you want to keep her interested, you have to act aloof, like you don't really care one way or the other."_

If nothing else, he was glad to be Katara's friend. And Meng's, too.

The fact was, he didn't have a lot of time on his hands for romance. There was too many other things he had to do – like do battle with a volcano, and save the world.

It almost felt normal, having an adventure, saving an Earth Kingdom town, all in a span of twenty-four hours. _Some things never change,_ Katara thought when they prepared to leave the following morning.

"No offense, but I hope this taught everyone a lesson about not relying too much on fortunetelling," Sokka said to the general assembly.

"But Aunt Wu predicted the village wouldn't be destroyed, and it wasn't," the calm man pointed out. "She was right, after all."

Sokka got right in the man's face. "I hate you."

Katara put her hands on Sokka's shoulders, gently leading him away. "It's okay, Sokka. Everything's going to be all right." She was confident of that much.

As Katara climbed onto Appa, she could hear Aunt Wu talking to Aang. "I'll tell you a secret, young airbender. Just as you reshaped those clouds, you have the power to reshape your own destiny." She paused. "Still, I do believe, you will be with the one you love."

Katara smiled to herself. Aunt Wu was kind of like her and Aang. In her own way, Aunt Wu gave people hope.

Katara's philosophy, her lifestyle, was based on hope. And it seemed to pay off, when she discovered the Avatar.

Now, for the first time, she understood why some people tried to _not_ hope. Because it would be less painful if your hopes didn't come to fruition.

Besides, Katara thought, if Aunt Wu's predictions were true, there was no telling who she had been talking about. There were other powerful benders.

This fact had been impressed upon her when she saw Aang stop the volcano from the destroying Makapu Village.

* * *

><p>Zuko held on to the necklace for multiple reasons. He didn't really think of it as his own; it belonged to Katara – he would just keep it safe for her. And now, it seemed, he would have an opportunity to return it to her.<p>

"I need you to find someone."

The bounty huntress, June, looked unimpressed by the necklace. "What happened? Your girlfriend run off on you?"

In fact, there was more truth to that statement than she knew. Iroh was certain he saw some emotion flicker in Zuko's face, a wave of sadness perhaps; but immediately his face was hard again. "It's not the girl I'm after," he said tersely, "it's the bald monk she's traveling with."

"Whatever you say," the woman said indifferently.

_I'm going to see you, Katara_. Zuko wasn't looking forward to it, exactly, but he couldn't deny he felt some slight sense of apprehension. Which he shouldn't. They had more or less agreed to continue fighting against each other. Things were just going back to the way they had been before.

* * *

><p>It had been a week since Katara was reunited with Aang and Sokka.<p>

And here she was again, leaving behind someone she cared about.

Again, there were no hard feelings, only vague pangs of regret that should not exist. It was a mutual thing. It wasn't anything they had done. She just had priorities and loyalties … and in both cases, she chose to stay with Sokka, the one person who had been there for her during her entire life. She was Water Tribe; to them, family came first.

Katara, Sokka, and Bato didn't talk much during their journey. From somewhere far off, they could hear a lone wolf cry.

"That wolf sounds so sad," Katara said softly.

"Maybe it's wounded," Sokka suggested.

"No, it's been separated from the pack," Bato said. "I understand that pain. It's how I felt when the Water Tribe warriors had to leave me behind. They were my family, and being apart from them was more painful than my wounds."

Katara bowed her head, feeling a pang of – guilt? No, sympathy.

For one thing, she understood what it was like to be separated from the people you love. That had been the worst part of being Zuko's prisoner.

For another, she realized that must be how Zuko felt, all the time. Only he hadn't been left behind, he had been pushed away and told not to come back.

There was only one way he could be rid of that pain … but she wouldn't think about that. For him, it was something he had no choice about. For her, it was something she simply couldn't help.

Which was worse, Katara wondered: being left behind, or being force ahead?

Sokka's voice, uncharacteristically serious, pulled her out of her thoughts. "We need to go back. I want to see Dad, but helping Aang is where we're needed the most."

Katara smiled. "You're right."

She didn't feel guilty about going back to Aang rather than back to Zuko. After all, Zuko had his uncle for companionship and a crew to help on his mission; Aang had no one, unless Katara and Sokka accompanied him.

Later, she thought it strange that she had thought of Zuko then, only to see him in person a very short while later.

Zuko saw unmistakable fear in her eyes. Which only made sense, really.

"So this is your girlfriend," the bounty huntress commented. Zuko didn't correct her – something that did not go unnoticed by Sokka. Nor did Katara try to deny it.

"No wonder she left. She's way too pretty for you," June said sarcastically

_True,_ Sokka thought, briefly amused.

_That's __**not**__ why I left,_ Katara thought furiously.

"It is getting way too easy for people to capture us," Sokka said to her a few minutes later. "I'm kind of worried about that."

Zuko knelt down to pick up a paralyzed Katara. For a moment gold eyes met blue. Neither pair held any apology, nor acceptance; only grim understanding.

Katara turned her head (even though it was uncomfortable while lying on her stomach), looking away from him. Then she gasped slightly as he rolled her onto her side and picked her up bridal style, carrying her onto the shirshu. She couldn't feel much, though, as her nerves were numb from the toxins. Katara was sure Zuko was gentler with her than with Sokka, who he dropped none too ceremoniously onto the saddle.

Jun held the reins; Iroh sat behind her, and Zuko after him, with Katara and then Sokka slung across the animal's back. Katara felt Zuko hold on to the back of her shirt whenever the shirshu jostled them. Did he still want to keep her from getting hurt, even now? She almost appreciated it.

On the ride back to the abbey, she tried not to hope for any particular course of events, because she honestly didn't know what to hope for.

She should have known that Aang would return to save them. That was the kind of friend Aang was – he wouldn't abandon them. And that was another reason why they shouldn't abandon him.

Katara and Zuko didn't interact with each other during the whole battle. Now that Zuko had found what he was looking for, that was all he cared about, Katara thought, not without some bitterness.

She stayed true to her word, and fought against the Fire Nation group – if dousing a giant mole with perfume counted as fighting.

Before they left, Katara glanced over her shoulder one last time. Zuko, Iroh ,and June were lying on the ground, paralyzed. For a moment she hesitated, wondering if she should do something – go back to check on them or say good-bye – but then she turned and followed her brother and her friend out of the abbey.

Lying on the ground, Zuko watched her leave, unable to stop her. He saw the trio fly away on their bison – out of his reach once again.

"So … where do we go now?" Aang asked apprehensively as he steered Appa.

"We're getting you to the North Pole," Katara answered confidently.

"Yeah, we've lost too much time as it is," Sokka agreed.

Aang looked at them in surprise, climbing over to the saddle on Appa's back. "Don't you want to see your father?"

"Of course we do, Aang," Sokka said seriously. "But, you're our family too; and right now, you need us more."

"And we need you," Katara added truthfully. Hearing Sokka's words, she felt – she knew – that she had done the right thing by continuing her quest with Aang and Sokka. She was needed here more than on Zuko's ship. And, when you got right down to it, looking at the long run, she needed Aang more than she needed Zuko.

"I wish I could give you a little piece of home, Katara," Aang said softly. "Something to remind you …"

"I'll be okay," Katara assured him. He didn't know that she wasn't just talking about leaving behind her home. Sure, maybe she had a lump in her throat now, and maybe sometimes she felt an ache in her chest, but she was happy overall.

"Still, just a little trinket," Aang insisted; then this tone became casual. "Maybe something like … this!" Aang pulled out her necklace with a flourish, a broad grin on his face.

Katara gasped. Sokka blinked, rubbed his eyes, and then looked again, thoroughly confused.

"Aang, how did you get that?" Katara asked as she accepted the necklace and put it back around her neck.

"Zuko asked me to be sure I got it to you," Aang said jokingly.

Katara looked at him. For a moment she wondered if he was serious; but his expression and tone said otherwise. "Well, how sweet of Zuko," she said in mock appreciation. "Could you give him a kiss for me next time you see him?"

"Sure," Aang joked, closing his eyes and smiling happily.

Sokka studied Katara curiously, but he kept his mouth shut.

Gran-Gran used to say, "Three things cannot be hidden long: the sun, the moon, and the truth." If there _was_ something going on, he'd find out, eventually.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>This chapter turned out longer than I had planned. But, I have reasons for including everything. If you don't see them now, you probably will later. That line about the truth is a quote from the Buddha; I thought it was appropriate for the context.


	18. The Deserter

_Published January 16, 2012_

There is no fire without some smoke.  
>~ John Heywood, <em>Proverbes<em>

When Aang accidentally hurt Katara with firebending, it was the second time she had ever been burned – and by someone she loved, no less. The pain pulled up memories that she had set aside two weeks before: the duel, the shock, the burn …

Water. She needed water. She could heal herself, she knew now. She couldn't answer Aang through her sobs; she just ran away, heading for the riverbank.

She didn't want to listen to Sokka reprimand Aang. It was just a reminder of how protective Sokka could be of her, how angry he would be if he ever knew her secret.

Katara squatted in front of the bank. She slowly took her hands away from her body; she could see that they were badly burned. Bracing herself for more pain, she dipped them under the water; after a moment the pain diminished, replaced by a wave of relief. Katara exhaled, watching her hands glow blue.

The last person she had healed was Zuko, when he burned himself while trying to create lightning. At different times, he hurt her, and she helped him.

Katara felt a ripple of guilt, remembering. She had agreed to go to that Fire Nation festival the other day in the faint hope that Zuko might be there. She knew it was a stupid thing to hope for … still, she missed him, sometimes.

"You have healing abilities," a voice said, interrupting her contemplation. Katara turned and saw Master Jeong Jeong approaching her. "The great benders of the Water Tribe sometimes have this ability."

He sat down in the sand next to Katara. "I've always wished I was blessed like you," Jeong Jeong said wistfully. "Free from this burning curse."

"But you're a great master," Katara said, her voice full of respect. "You have powers I'll never know."

"Water brings healing and life … but fire brings only destruction and pain." Jeong Jeong's voice was bitter.

"But you're wrong!" Katara blurted out. Jeong Jeong looked surprised and affronted, but Katara rushed on. "I once said the same thing. But a friend of mine, a firebender, taught me otherwise. He taught me that all the elements have good and bad qualities. Fire can be destructive, but it also gives light and warmth. It's life. We need fire as much as we need water."

Jeong Jeong studied her, looking dubious. Katara turned away, feeling her cheeks burn with embarrassment. Why couldn't she keep her mouth shut? Who was she, an untrained waterbender, to lecture a firebending master about the nature of his own element?

"And how is my dear friend Iroh?" Jeong Jeong asked conversationally.

Katara looked at him in shock. "How did you …"

Suddenly the water in front of them seemed to be lit aflame. Jeong Jeong leapt to his feet in a defensive stance and broke the flames in front of them, revealing three wooden riverboats bearing down on them. Fire Nation. But Katara knew it wasn't Zuko; it was Zhao.

Jeong Jeong looked over his shoulder at Katara, who scrambled to her feet. "Go get your friends and flee!" She took off toward the forest as he shouted, "Do not come back here or you will all be destroyed. Hurry!"

Katara ran as fast as she could. Sokka pointed her in the direction of Jeong Jeong's hut. Katara found Aang inside.

Aang was sitting in the circle of candles, his back facing the door. When he heard Katara enter, he spoke up sorrowfully. "Jeong Jeong tried to tell me that I wasn't ready. I wouldn't listen. I'm never going to firebend again."

"You'll have to, eventually," Katara said softly. As hard as it was, Aang had to accept that firebending was a part of him, something he couldn't deny.

"No. Never again. I don't want to end up hurting anyone I care about."

Katara could understand that; she felt the same way, more than he realized. But still. "Aang, it's okay," she said gently. "I'm healed."

Aang turned around in surprise, and Katara showed him her unblemished hands. "Remember, I told you, I have healing abilities." Before Aang could speak, Katara rushed on. "Listen, right now, we have to get out of here. Zhao and his soldiers are attacking."

Aang airbended himself to his feet. "Where?" he demanded.

"By the river. They captured Jeong Jeong."

"I have to help him!" Aang ran out of the hut. Katara hesitated, and then followed him.

Sokka joined them as they ran out of the campsite toward the river. "Shouldn't we be running _away_ from the Fire Nation?" Sokka panted.

"We have to help Jeong Jeong – he can't get captured because of me!" Aang stopped short at the edge of the forest. Jeong Jeong was standing on the crescent-shaped beach, surrounded by soldiers – Katara counted eight, plus Zhao. "Jeong Jeong!" Aang shouted.

Zhao called out an order. "Men! Take the deserter!"

Jeong Jeong looked at Aang and smiled briefly. At the moment when three firebenders shot at him, Jeong Jeong spun around, creating a ball of fire around himself. Then the inferno expanded, forcing the soldiers back.

When the flames dispersed, Jeong Jeong was gone.

"It's a trick!" Zhao shouted angrily. "He's run off into the woods. Find him!" The soldiers hurried into the woods, leaving only Zhao and the trio on the beach. He turned to face Aang. "Let's find out what my old master has taught you."

Aang was startled. "_You_ were Jeong Jeong's student?" he said incredulously.

"Until I got bored." Zhao threw another fireball at Aang, who quickly dodged it. Then he glanced at Katara, noticing her for the first time. "Fancy seeing you here, Katara of the Water Tribe," he said pointedly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sokka said, narrowing his eyes at the man.

Katara fought back a grimace, knowing they were coming dangerously close to the topic she had to avoid. "We saw each other on Prince Zuko's ship."

"I'm surprised you left," Zhao said loftily. "I thought you were going to be very happy together."

Sokka blinked. "Say what?"

"Don't listen to him," Katara said through clenched teeth. "He's trying to distract us."

"Oh, right – I forgot." Aang sliced his hand through the air, sending Zhao landing on his back in the sand.

Zhao lifted his head to look at Katara. Rather than looking angry, he looked merely curious. "You mean you didn't tell them?" he asked incredulously.

"Tell us what?" Sokka asked, looking suspiciously at Katara.

"There's nothing to tell," Katara insisted, but Sokka could see the fear in her eyes.

"I'll say there isn't," Zhao said, laughing as he got to his feet. He addressed Sokka. "You want to know what happened? The Fire Prince fell in love with your sister."

For a moment Sokka and Aang stared dumbly at Zhao. Sokka glanced at Katara, who looked mortified. Then suddenly Aang let out a burst of laughter. "Zuko? Fall for Katara? I mean, she's nice, but he'd never see that."

"Oh, I don't know," Zhao said loftily. "If you spend a week together on a ship, things are bound to happen."

"Shut UP!" Katara swiftly bended a stream of water and whipped it at Zhao, but this only had the effect of splashing him. Katara frowned, not understanding why the water whip hadn't done more – she had done it right before.

"So, tell me, how did Zuko react when you left?" Zhao smiled cruelly, enjoying this more than he should have. "Was he heartbroken? And how'd you feel, leaving him?"

"Okay, that's going far enough," Aang said, sounding a bit anxious now.

"Even if Zuko liked Katara, she'd never like him back," Sokka insisted, trying to sound practical. "She's too smart for that. She knows that he's nothing but trouble. And she's way too nice to like someone like him. What could Katara see in him?"

"Why don't you ask her yourselves?" Zhao said, folding his arms.

Sokka looked at Katara. "Tell him he's wrong," he said, sounding a bit desperate. "Tell him you're not in love with Zuko."

Katara clenched her fists at her sides. "I'm not in love with him," she said in a low voice, but it sounded tight and unconvincing.

"Katara?"

She looked at her brother and her best friend with tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice cracking.

Aang gaped at her. "What – how – you – and Zuko –"

Suddenly Katara's eyes widened. "Look out!"

Aang spun around and just barely dodged another wave of fire, which caught on some of the trees at the edge of the forest. Zhao had tried to attack when his back was turned.

"This is low, even for you," Katara said with loathing.

In a rare moment of anger, Aang went on the offensive, sending two air blasts from his hands toward Zhao. They slammed the admiral into tree trunk, knocking the wind out of him. Seeing his opponent at bay, Aang fell to his knees, panting slightly, listening to his friends argue.

"You lied to me?" Sokka whispered, squinting at Katara in disbelief. "I asked if Zuko tried anything with you –"

"He _didn't_!"

"Tell the truth!" Sokka ordered. "_What did you do?_"

"We kissed, okay?" Katara snapped. "Does that satisfy your curiosity?"

At the word _kissed_, Aang's head snapped up, a dismayed look on his face.

Sokka sputtered, his voice high and incoherent. "What – but – how – you –" Granted, it wasn't quite as bad as some of the things he had thought of and worried about. But she said "We kissed," not "He kissed me."

"You kissed _Zuko_?" Aang exclaimed.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Sokka sounded helpless.

"Because I knew what you would say." Katara mimicked her brother. "_'How could you do this to us? What would Mom and Dad say? How can you turn your back on your friends, your family, your people?'_"

Sokka blinked at her. "Wow." That did pretty much sum it up.

"Don't you see? I knew it wouldn't work. That's why I left. I haven't done anything – except like him."

Sokka folded his arms. "And has he ever given you reason to think he feels the same?"

Katara paused. "Yes, he has." Sokka looked slightly surprised, but Katara continued, her voice steady now. "Zhao came to Zuko's ship and said all prisoners affiliated with the Avatar had to be turned over to him; but Zuko and Iroh wouldn't let him take me. They _protected_ me. So don't be mad at Zuko, for any of this."

Aang was barely listening anymore. His mind was swimming with all the new, impossible information. Was this why Katara hadn't noticed him? She was in love with someone other than him – that alone would have been a blow – but not only that, she was in love with Aang's archenemy. … It was too much to take in. Suddenly Aang's eyes and arrow tattoos glowed light blue.

"Oh, no," Katara moaned. The Avatar State.

Aang rose up in the air, a blue sphere of wind whirling around him. Katara and Sokka had to shield their eyes from the sand being whipped around the beach. Within seconds the wind extinguished the fire Zhao had set to the forest.

Sokka pushed Katara forward. "Katara, you can usually get him to snap out of it. Do something!"

Katara nodded. She turned and looked up at Aang hovering in midair. "Aang!" she yelled. "Can you hear me? I'm sorry you had to find out like this. But it doesn't change anything." Her voice cracked, and she rubbed tears out of her eyes before looking back at Aang.

"I won't leave you," Katara vowed. And she knew that that was her decision. She had made a commitment to helping Aang. She needed to finish what she had started.

After a moment Aang started to descend. He landed on the ground, the sphere dissolved, his eyes and arrows stopped glowing. Aang fainted into Katara's arms, and she hugged him tightly.

"I'm sorry," Aang murmured.

"It's okay," Katara assured him.

"You … might want to rethink that." Sokka's voice broke them out of their moment. Katara looked up and saw that Zhao was on his feet again, and his men were returning from the forest. Katara stood up, ready to defend Aang – he was in no shape to fight now. She turned and tried to bend some water from the river, but it wouldn't stay up right, and she ended up dropping it before she could project it toward the soldiers. Katara growled in frustration. She had been getting better lately; why was she messing up now?

_"Waterbending requires letting your emotions flow smoothly like water. Suppressing your emotions can inhibit your bending; giving in and accepting your emotions, and coming to terms with them, can improve your bending."_

Sokka fought valiantly, but his boomerang could only hit one person at a time. Even as he struck down one soldier, two more grabbed him from behind.

Aang didn't have any fight left in him after hearing Zhao's revelation, and entering the Avatar State had drained him of energy. He tried to deal a few blows, but the firebenders quickly overtook him.

"Aang!" Katara tried to reach him, but two soldiers grabbed her, forcing her hands behind her back.

"Katara!" Sokka tried to wrench away from the soldiers, but one of them hit him on the back of the head. He fell face-first into the sand, unconscious.

"Sokka!" Aang struggled, but the soldiers held him back.

"Leave the older boy; he's not a bender. But bring the Avatar and the waterbender to the ship." Through her tears, Katara could see Zhao's smug, triumphant smile directed at her.

* * *

><p>When Sokka came to his senses, he found himself alone, lying facedown on the beach. He pushed himself up on his arms, coughing and wiping the sand off his face.<p>

He looked around warily. The trees lining the forest were smoldering from the fire. "Katara? Aang?" Then his eyes widened at the sight of the riverboats already moving quickly down the river. "No – _no_!" He stood up shakily and ran to the edge of the riverbank, watching in horror as the boats disappeared around the bend.

"FIRE JERKS!" He swore and kicked at the sand. Then he spotted something shiny on the beach; it was his boomerang. He trudged over to pick up the weapon; somehow it helped to hold onto something that had aided him so many times.

_Okay – no time to be hysterical_, Sokka thought, slipping the boomerang back into its sheath. "Gotta think, gotta do something … maybe find help …" He ran back into the forest, shouting out names. "Jeong Jeong! Chey! Anyone?" His voice rose an octave as he sounded more hysterical. "You got us into this mess! You can't just disappear! HELP!"

No one answered.

Not knowing where else to go, Sokka returned to the now deserted camp, his feet dragging in the sand, his head bowed in despair.

He searched his mind for anyone he knew who could help. Bato and the rest of the Water Tribe fleet were probably days or weeks away by now. If only Jeong Jeong and the other deserters hadn't disappeared. Who else was skilled enough, and would be willing to help?

Sokka felt an unpleasant sensation in his stomach as he thought of one person who might have an incentive to rescue Aang and Katara.

_They protected me_.

No, there had to be another way … except he couldn't think of one.

Could it work?

Was it worth the risk?

How much would he be risking?

As hard as he tried, he couldn't think of another option. And he didn't have time to brainstorm other ideas and concoct a better plan. He needed to come to a decision now.

"I just _know_ I'm going to regret this," Sokka muttered to Appa as he climbed onto the bison's neck. Momo flew over and perched on Appa's horn. Sokka looked uncertainly at the lemur. "D'you think I'm crazy for considering this?"

Momo just blinked his big green eyes.

Sokka shrugged. "All I can say is, Katara's going to owe me big." He reluctantly flicked the reins. "Yip-yip!"

Appa took off, and they flew back in the direction of the coast.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> This was a tricky chapter to finish. How to have a confrontation of emotions in the middle of a battle, and keep everyone – especially Zhao – in character? Let me know what you think. I may go back and change some bits.


	19. Temporary Alliance

_Published January 28, 2012_

Song: "I've Grown Accustomed to her Face" from _My Fair Lady_, music by Frederick Loewe, lyrics by Alan Jay Lerner

* * *

><p>Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire, called conscience.<br>~ George Washington

* * *

><p>Zuko tried to stay as busy as possible. He trained, he meditated, he pored over maps with the navigator. He even accepted Iroh's invitations to play Pai Sho, despite the fact that Iroh always won. Because it was usually when Zuko was alone or inactive that his thoughts wandered back to the same thing.<p>

Katara.

Most of the time, he did a fair job distracting himself. But every now and then she resurfaced in his mind, rising like an unbidden tide. And he would remember little things she had said and done.

_Sometimes it hurts to care. The more you care, the more you have to lose._

She was certainly right about that.

The navigator's voice interrupted his thoughts during the game. "Sir, the Avatar's bison is in sight."

"What?" There was no way. They had been off the trail for days, and now all of a sudden the Avatar happened to come their way? There was something not right about that.

Zuko stood and strode over to the panoramic window. The navigator handed him a spyglass and pointed. Sure enough, there was the white sky bison – flying closer to the ship.

"What are they doing?" Did they _want_ to be captured?

"Perhaps our friend wants a rematch," Iroh joked, tossing the White Lotus tile and catching it in his palm.

Zuko turned to glare at his uncle. "She is _not_ our – oh, forget it." Zuko shoved the spyglass into the navigator's hands and stormed down the stairs. "Come on."

Half of the crew were on the deck, watching the bison fly in their direction. "Should we shoot them down, sir?" Lieutenant Jee asked.

"Not yet," Zuko said slowly. "Just stand ready." He didn't know what they were playing at – either they were turning themselves in, or they were trying some kind of attack.

A month ago, he would have shot them down without hesitation. And now?

_I'm just being cautious,_ he reasoned. The objective was still to capture the Avatar.

What little hope Zuko had felt, fluctuated when he saw that the only passenger was the Water Tribe boy – Katara's brother.

"This can't be good," Zuko muttered under his breath.

Several people gasped as the bison swooped down, almost level with the ship's main body, and just a hundred feet away from it.

"Um … permission to land?" Sokka called out, sounding both assertive and uncertain.

Zuko glanced at Iroh, who shrugged, as though to say, _Who knows?_

"I don't like this," Zuko said in a low voice.

"He has more to fear from you than you do from him," Lieutenant Jee pointed out.

"It's important!" Sokka shouted.

"Fine – permission granted," Zuko said grudgingly.

The Fire Nation men hurried to the half of the deck near the control tower, allowing the bison room to land on the other side.

The warrior held up his arms in a gesture of surrender as he slid off the bison.

"What do _you_ want?" Zuko demanded.

"I need to talk to you." Sokka's tone was calm and serious, though his eyes – blue, Zuko noticed, like Katara's – were full of dislike.

Zuko looked at him suspiciously, but he waved away the soldiers who had come on deck. Only Iroh, Zuko, Sokka, and Appa were left.

Zuko folded his arms, raising an eyebrow at the Water Tribe teen. He nodded in the direction of the bison. "Where are your friends?"

"That's why I'm here." He looked Zuko in the eye. "Zhao captured Aang and Katara."

Zuko's annoyed expression vanished, replaced by one of shock, and then horror. Then he remembered that he couldn't let Sokka know he was concerned for Katara, and tried to wipe his face of emotion.

When he spoke, his voice sounded strange. "… Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I need your help rescuing them," Sokka said in a flat, calm voice.

Zuko stared at the warrior in complete disbelief. He wanted his help? Sokka knew that he wanted to capture the Avatar for himself. Why would he ask him to help?

Unless … a bewildering and embarrassing thought crossed Zuko's mind.

Did he know?

Zuko's uneasiness did not go unnoticed. Sokka kept his eyes downcast as he explained, "Zhao was fighting all three of us, and he started talking about you and mocking Katara. It got to the point where he forced her to tell Aang and me that … you and she … had fallen in love." Sokka winced as he said those last words; it seemed so weird, so wrong, to say them in reference to his sister and his enemy.

Zuko made a noise somewhere between a groan and a scowl, running his hand over his scalp. Of course Zhao wouldn't miss an opportunity to further ruin his life.

"She also said you wouldn't let Zhao take custody of her. Thank you, by the way," Sokka said in an unusually serious tone.

Zuko blinked at him. "For what?"

"For taking care of Katara. For protecting her when I couldn't."

"You're welcome," Zuko said uncertainly. He had expected hostility, and it was clear that Sokka was trying hard to maintain self-control, but he hadn't expected thanks.

"I _could_ tell you off for messing around with my sister," Sokka said with an edge to his voice, "in fact, I probably _should_; but now's not the time. The fact of the matter is, I can't rescue Katara and Aang on my own."

"So … you want me to help you?"

Sokka looked at him. "Yeah, I do."

Zuko studied the Water Tribe boy for a long moment. Then he glanced at Iroh, an unspoken question in his eyes.

Iroh said the same thing he had once told Katara. "Choose your battles." That was all the advice Iroh would offer. He never told Zuko what to do; he only tried to give him the wisdom to make his own decisions.

Zuko was still silent, mulling it over. Then he looked back at Sokka. "You do realize," Zuko said, "you're asking me to fight against soldiers of my own nation. If I got caught, I'd be imprisoned or killed, same as you."

Sokka set his jaw. "Of course." He turned, as though to walk away. "I understand if you don't want to –"

Zuko grabbed the boy's shoulder, forcing him to stop. "I didn't say I refused," Zuko said tensely.

Sokka turned around to face him. "So you'll help me?"

"Yes. I'm just surprised that … you'd trust me to help you."

"Hey, 'trust' is a strong word. Don't think I don't know you'll try to capture Aang as soon as he's out of Zhao's hands," Sokka said testily. "But then, I got to wondering …" Sokka ran his fingers over his boomerang. "How do you think your dad would react if someone captured you and threatened your life?"

Zuko stared at the warrior. Was he serious? "You wouldn't dare," Zuko said.

The next thing he knew, he was thrown to the side and pinned against the wall of the control tower. He could feel the the sharpened blade of the boomerang against his neck.

"Think again," Sokka hissed in his ear, before releasing him. Zuko turned around slowly and looked at him with new respect.

Sokka looked down at the deck. "We both have something to risk by teaming up. But, I figured … since neither of us wants Zhao to have Katara and Aang, we might as well work together."

Zuko nodded, but he still hesitated. He turned to Iroh. "What about the crew? They've seen him here. If they suspect me …"

"I'll tell them he's an informer, offering us his service as a double agent. No one will be the wiser," Iroh promised. "And I can hold Music Night so they won't notice you're gone."

Zuko nodded, satisfied, and headed for the door. "I can be ready in five minutes."

Iroh and Sokka stood awkwardly on the deck. Then, for lack of anything better to do, Sokka started pacing back and forth.

"Are you okay?" Iroh asked.

Sokka ran a hand over his head. "I'm fine – you know, relatively speaking. I just hope I won't regret this later."

"I think you're wise to ask for help. A good warrior knows his capabilities and refuses help from no man."

Sokka looked at the old man, slightly surprised. That's what he had always been to Sokka – the fat old guy who traveled with Zuko. But he actually knew a bit about being a warrior. Sokka nodded. "I know the enemy of my enemy is supposed to be my friend. But it's more complicated than that."

Zuko climbed up to the deck again, dressed entirely in black, carrying a grotesque blue mask in his left hand and his broadswords in his right. Sokka raised his eyebrows at the ninja outfit.

"What … you know, I'm not going to ask." Sokka shook his head. "Ready?"

Zuko strapped the broadsword sheath securely on his back. "Let's do this."

Sokka climbed up onto Appa's neck. Zuko took a seat in the saddle.

"Good luck," Iroh said, looking up at them. "Give Katara my regards."

Sokka nodded and flicked the reins. "Yip-yip!" Appa thudded his tail on the metal deck and took off. Zuko held onto the saddle for dear life as the bison ascended. Was this how they always traveled? Actually, once they had reached an altitude that Sokka liked, the bison on the wind was about as stable as the ship on the waves.

"'Yip-yip?'" Zuko repeated once he had recovered himself.

"Hey, I didn't train this bison," Sokka said defensively.

For the first time in weeks, Zuko wanted to be alone with his thoughts. He was going to see Katara again, and they wouldn't be fighting against each other. What would he say? How would she react?

Zuko wished they could travel in silence for the whole ride; but Sokka kept speaking up, asking questions as they occurred to him.

"What is it you see in her?"

Zuko looked at Sokka, who wouldn't turn around to meet his gaze. Sokka was quiet, waiting for his answer.

Zuko was silent for a moment, thinking. He wasn't used to expressing his emotions; and his feelings for Katara were confusing even for him.

What he said was, "There's the fact that she cares about me …" He trailed off, before adding quietly, "I don't get that from a lot of people." He couldn't explain to Sokka what he really meant.

Sokka glanced over his shoulder at Zuko, who was staring at the bottom of the saddle. The Fire Prince looked thoughtful, a little sad, almost tender.

"Do you love her?" Sokka asked suddenly.

Startled, Zuko's eyes shot upward to look at Sokka. The Water Tribe boy's frown was not exactly angry, but rather concerned, perhaps curious.

Zuko looked away again. Would he believe him if he said yes? Was that even the answer? He knew he had feelings, but were they that strong?

"'Love' is a strong word," he said quietly.

"Then what?"

"Look, I care about her, okay?" Zuko snapped. What was he supposed to do, pour his heart out to his crush's brother?

Sokka grunted noncommittally. "I only ask because, if you love her, now is your chance to prove it."


	20. Acceptance

_Published February 21, 2012  
>Edited October 13, 2012<em>

**Author's Note:** Thanks to everyone who reviewed! You really helped me. I deleted the AN from the previous chapter so people reading this for the first time won't know what might happen.

Artwork: "Pirates Again" by GreenEnigma on DeviantArt

Song: The second half of "Season 3 Trailer," which you can listen to on AvatarWiki's page about the Soundtrack of Avatar. Imagine that music during Katara's big moment.

* * *

><p>They act quickly, these desperate inventors of expedients, in their struggles with destiny. ~ Victor Hugo, <em>Les Misérables<em>

* * *

><p>Katara and Aang were chained to the wall in a holding cell, metal bars separating them from each other and from the rest of the room.<p>

"We're prisoners again," Aang said ruefully, hugging his legs to his chest. "I guess this means we've come full circle."

"I'm so sorry, Aang," Katara said mournfully.

_Sorry for what?_ Aang wondered. _Kissing Zuko, or keeping secrets, or getting us captured just now?_

"This is all my fault," Katara said miserably.

"Zhao played on our emotions," Aang said reasonably. "That wasn't your fault. I'm the one who went into the Avatar State," he acknowledged gloomily.

"But that wouldn't have happened if I had told you in the beginning …" Katara trailed off.

There was a pregnant pause. Then Aang voiced the obvious question, in a pained voice. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"Because … I decided – at least, I tried to convince myself – that it didn't matter," Katara said in a small voice. She looked at her hands, avoiding Aang's eyes. "I could guess how you guys would feel if you knew – angry, betrayed, vengeful." She looked up at Aang. "After everything you've been through lately, I didn't want to cause you more pain."

Aang felt his heart swell with affection for Katara. She was so loving, so compassionate, and so sensitive to others' emotions. Even while falling in love, she tried to not be selfish, to be considerate of her friends.

"Besides," Katara said, "how would you and Sokka have reacted if I had come clean and told you straight out that Zuko and I liked each other?"

Aang thought for a moment, and then said, "Well, you saw what happened to me back there. Sokka would ground you for life, and then get himself killed trying to assassinate Zuko."

"Another reason I couldn't tell you," Katara explained. "I didn't want him to go after Zuko, or kill him the next time he found us. And I knew it would never work out anyway. So, I _tried_ not to care.

"I think that's why I had trouble bending just now." Katara didn't look at Aang. "I was still holding back, and trying to deny my feelings. Iroh – Zuko's uncle – said that your emotions can effect the … efficiency, of your bending. Like, if you deal with them instead of trying to avoid them, you'll have more control over your element."

Aang looked at her with something that might have been amazement. "You're in love with him." It was not a question.

"You said it, not me," Katara said quietly.

"But it's true, isn't it?" Aang pressed.

Katara took a deep breath. "Yes," she admitted. And somehow, saying that made her feel better, as though some small part of the weight had been lifted off her heart. She hugged herself, feeling a sense of warmth rise up in her chest.

Aang stared at her. He opened his mouth, but found he had nothing to say. He made a noise like a sigh or a groan. Then he murmured something into his knees; Katara thought it sounded like, "_Lucky_."

She looked at him, concerned, and now curious. "Are you … jealous?"

Aang snorted, laughing a little. "Me? Jealous of Zuko?" He laughed nervously.

Katara looked at him, unconvinced.

"Okay," Aang sighed, "maybe a little. It's just … I liked you first! And you never even noticed!"

Katara blinked at him. "Since when have you liked me that way?"

"I don't know … since we met? At least since we visited Kyoshi."

"Oh, Aang." Katara looked at him, her eyes full of concern. "I didn't realize … I'm sorry."

"It doesn't matter," Aang muttered, looking away. His chains clinked as he folded his arms. "I knew you didn't like me that way. You made that clear when we were in Makapu."

They sat in silence for a moment. Now it was Katara who felt as though she'd been in the dark.

The thought of "being with" Aang had crossed her mind before, and she had often felt that she loved him, but she hadn't felt any attraction or connection with him, not the way she had with Zuko.

Aang and Zuko were so different. Aang was younger, sweet, inexperienced, and cheerful. Zuko was older, often frustrated, strong, silent, with hidden depths.

Katara spoke up quietly. "Aang, I left behind my home and my tribe for you. There's no prince I'd do that for."

"Well, thanks," Aang murmured, knowing she had a point.

"Hey." Katara reached through the bars and put her hand on Aang's shoulder. "Someday some lucky girl is going to fall in love with you. But you're just twelve, and right now you have to focus on saving the world. If you make it to the teen years, you'll have plenty of time to find love."

Aang made a face. Katara winced, drawing her hand back. "That didn't come out right, did it?"

Aang was thinking about how to respond, when they heard shouting from above. The two prisoners exchanged glances.

"Pirates?" Katara whispered.

"Deserters?" Aang suggested.

"Water Tribe warriors?"

"Earth Kingdom soldiers?"

"Maybe they'll help us."

"We don't know if they're friend or foe."

"To us, or to the Fire Nation?"

They could hear noise from outside the cell. Muffled shouts, and the sound of doors slamming open and shut.

Katara squeezed Aang's hand. "I'm sorry I lied to you."

"I'm sorry I got so upset," Aang said in a rush.

"I love you, Aang – and I can say it to you without hesitating."

He smiled, a genuine smile now. "Thanks. I love you, too."

There was a yelp from outside the room, a muffled thud, and a sound like keys jangling. A moment later, the door burst open.

Sokka half ran, half stumbled into the room, holding his boomerang in his right hand and Aang's staff in his left hand.

"Sokka!" Katara's mouth broke into an incredulous smile.

"You came!" Aang said happily.

Suddenly everything had changed: they were on their way out; their hopes and their spirits were lifted; they were no longer separated; all was not lost; they were going to fight again.

Someone stepped up from behind Sokka: a ninja with a blue demonic mask wielding dual broadswords in one hand, and a ring of keys in the other. An unconscious Fire Nation soldier lay in the stairwell behind him.

Aang's eyes widened at the sight of the Blue Spirit. But he looked more than surprised: his expression was angry, almost as if threatened.

"Who is – that?" Katara asked, startled.

"It's okay; he's here to help," Sokka said calmly. He didn't say "He's on our side."

The stranger came over to the cages with the ring of keys. "Give me those," Sokka ordered, swiping the keys from him. The Blue Spirit folded his arms, annoyed, but stepped back.

Sokka tried the first key on the lock to Katara's cage, but it didn't fit. He tried the next one, and the next. Then, on the fourth key, he heard a click, and the metal door swung open.

Katara stood, rattling her chains. Sokka came in and tried to find the right key to unlock the manacles. Then the Blue Spirit stepped up and tapped him on the shoulder. "I can do it!" Sokka protested.

The Blue Spirit shook his head in disbelief, then raised one broadsword. Sokka's eyes widened, but he didn't stop it from coming down.

Katara cried out, but then looked down and saw the chains were severed. Then he slit the manacles, which fell off of her wrists and landed with a satisfying clatter on the floor.

"That works, too," Sokka said grudgingly.

Katara hugged him briefly. "Look, Sokka, about earlier –" she started to say.

Sokka waved her off. "We'll talk about it later. We're going to have a _long_ talk," he promised her. It sounded like a warning.

The Blue Spirit held out something: her water pouch. "Thank you," she said, accepting it uncertainly.

"Are you okay?" Sokka asked curiously.

"Um, yeah. Just trying not to freak out," Katara said, glancing first at the Blue Spirit and then at the unconscious guard just outside the room.

Sokka laughed a little. "Now you know how I felt earlier."

Once he was free, Aang pulled Sokka away. "Do you know who that is?" he hissed.

Sokka frowned. "Well, yeah. I asked him to help."

Aang backed away, looking at him in disbelief. _"What?"_

"Wait – _you_ know who this is, Aang?" Sokka asked, pointing at the ninja.

Aang froze, realizing he'd let his surprise give him away.

"Guys, what's going on?" Katara sad, putting her hands on her hips.

Sokka turned to his sister. "Katara, can you just trust me, this once?"

Katara looked at him dubiously. Before she could respond, they heard shouts from above – actually, more like outside, perhaps from the other ships. "Looks like they noticed us," Sokka observed.

"What do we do?" Aang asked.

"Commandeer the boat, and beach it. In a pinch, we could jump overboard, then either swim to shore or call Appa. Try not to fight if you can avoid it, 'cause we didn't do so well before, and our only objective is to get out alive. Ready?"

Katara slung her water pouch over her shoulder, smiling determinedly. "Let's do this," she said firmly. "Time for a rematch."

The Blue Spirit pressed himself against the wall, looked down the hallway, and then motioned to the others to follow him. They stepped over the guard and hurried up the narrow stairs.

Apparently the men on the other two riverboats had noticed that the one in the lead had been infiltrated, and boarded this one to investigate. When the four fugitives came up the stairs, they were faced with three soldiers led by none other than Admiral Zhao. They stopped in their tracks; but they weren't the only ones who were shocked. Zhao looked surprised and then furious, glaring at the newcomer. "You again!"

_He's fought against Zhao before_. Katara and Sokka barely had time to register this bit of information, before the full fight broke out.

The boat was small, and there wasn't much room to move around. Katara and the Blue Spirit squared off against Zhao, who seemed more eager to attack the ninja than the waterbender.

Sokka backed up against the edge of the boat to avoid an attacker. He tried to duck a fiery attack, but then fell backwards overboard.

"Sokka!" Aang called out.

"I'm okay!" His voice was faint. "I'll be right back!"

Aang didn't have time to figure out what he meant, as he turned back to fight the oncoming firebenders. He zipped around the small control room that rose up in the middle of the boat.

Katara tried to fight, with water from the river, but she was still having trouble controlling it. Luckily the Blue Spirit helped hold them off, sometimes putting them on the defensive.

Katara growled in frustration, just like she had the night Zuko saved her from the pirates. "I can do this!" she exclaimed.

Then she heard Aang's voice clearly, even over the chaos. "Accept your emotions, Katara."

Katara looked at him in surprise, which quickly turned to gratitude.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, focusing on certain memories wrought with emotion. Zuko saving her from the pirates, catching her during the storm, returning her necklace, protecting her from Zhao, kissing her in the moonlight, professing his friendship …

She loved him, remembering him like that.

Feeling a surge of conviction, Katara moved her arms around her, summoning her element from the river. She saw Zhao's surprised expression when she sent a powerful jet of water toward him, knocking him off the boat and into the water below.

"All right!" Aang whooped.

Katara laughed and swiped the back of her hand across her eyes. She honestly didn't know if they were happy or sad tears.

Everyone paused when they heard a loud, animalistic roar. Then something massive rose up out of the forest on the left bank.

"Deus ex Appa!" Sokka cheered, holding the reins.

The firebenders on the three riverboats launched fireballs into the air; Sokka cried out and Appa swerved, doing his best to dodge while coming close to the boat in the lead.

"Abandon ship!" Katara called out. Aang nodded and unfolded his glider. Someone tried to set it on fire, but Katara defended him, dousing the fire and allowing him to take off. A moment later he was on Appa.

The Blue Spirit looked expectantly at Katara. "Go ahead, I'll be right there," she told him. He was reluctant, but when Appa circled down he grabbed onto one of the bison's horns and leapt on.

Katara bended a small wave of water onto the deck, and froze the soldiers' feet on it. Once they were immobile, she climbed up onto the roof of the control room. Appa was flying down again. Katara got a running start, her feet pounding on the metal. Then she jumped off the edge, reaching, reaching –

A gloved hand caught her wrist, and she held onto his, almost crashing into Appa's side. The Blue Spirit pulled her up into the safety of the saddle.

"Thanks," she said breathlessly. "I owe you one."

"We did it!" Sokka cried. "We were amazing! We –"

Katara smiled at him – the same smug look she had given him the first time they saw Appa fly.

"I mean –" Sokka shrugged, trying to act nonchalant in front of the newcomer. "Whatever. We do this on a daily basis."

"We showed him!" Aang slapped Katara a high-five. "That was awesome waterbending! You should've seen it, Sokka – she blew Zhao into the water!"

"How is it that you weren't able to do that earlier, but now you could?" Sokka asked.

Katara smiled and shrugged one shoulder. "It was like Iroh said. I accepted my emotions … and I let them go."

There was a brief pause.

"Well … I'm glad to hear that," Sokka said cheerfully.

"So … what happens now?" Aang asked, glancing at Sokka and then at the Blue Spirit.

"Once we're out of range, we'll land and drop off the Blue Spirit," Sokka said; the name felt strange on his tongue.

They didn't fly for very long. The spot where they landed was still in the forest, but closer to the coast. The Blue Spirit made to get up, when Katara grasped his forearm to stop him. He froze at her touch.

"Thank you for helping us," Katara said graciously. Then she bowed, the way she had seen Aang do before.

The Blue Spirit looked at her for a moment. Then he placed a gloved hand on her shoulder, and nodded a silent farewell.

Sokka watched with wary, suspicious eyes as the ninja climbed down from the saddle and landed on the ground. Suddenly Aang jumped down and landed next to him. "Can I have a word?"

The Blue Spirit glanced up at Sokka, who in turn looked at Aang. Sokka shrugged. "Whatever you say, I'll go with – but I'm watching you." He pointed two fingers at his eyes, and then at the Blue Spirit.

Katara watched this exchange wordlessly.

Aang and the Blue Spirit walked several yards away, so they were just out of earshot. Then the latter finally spoke. "What do you want? The truce is about to end."

Aang looked up at the mask, and could almost see the gold eyes looking out. "What are you playing at?" he asked.

"What?"

"What is it you're trying to do? Why did you do that, just now?"

There was a pause before Zuko answered. "Why do you think?"

"If you wanted to capture me, you could have done it without Sokka. Why'd you agree to a truce?"

Zuko scowled. He had a feeling the Avatar already knew the answer.

"Is it her?" Aang nodded in the direction of the bison, where Katara was sitting on the saddle.

"Do you really want to be having this conversation?" Zuko asked.

"No." Aang shifted his weight, looking awkward. "Um … it was nice fighting on the same side for a while," he offered.

Zuko almost smirked at the boy's attempt at cordiality. "Don't think this changes anything," he said flatly.

"Of course not," Aang said shortly.

There was a brief silence.

"I never thought I'd say this," Aang said, "but … thanks, Zuko."

"Don't mention it," Zuko returned.

"I mean –"

"_Ever_."

The mutual dislike was flaring up in both of them.

"You don't deserve her," Zuko said.

"And you do?" Aang challenged. He could tell the question caught Zuko off guard, which gave him an unusual sense of satisfaction. "You attacked her home, kidnapped her, and paralyzed her with a giant mole. Me – all I've ever done is be her friend."

"She's my friend too," Zuko informed him. He had almost denied this, when Iroh referred to her as such, but it was true.

"She's my best friend," Aang argued.

"She's my only friend," Zuko stated.

Aang found he didn't have a response to this. They had nothing more to say to each other. Finally the Blue Spirit turned and walked away, disappearing in the dark foliage. Aang retreated back to where his friends were waiting on Appa.

"For what it's worth," Sokka said quietly, so that only Aang could hear, "I agree with you."


	21. Confession

_Published February 21, 2012  
>Edited October 13, 2012<em>

* * *

><p>Doubt thou that the stars are fire;<br>Doubt thou that the sun doth move;  
>Doubt truth to be a liar;<br>But never doubt that I love.  
>~ William Shakespeare, <em>Hamlet<em>, II, ii

* * *

><p>Sokka insisted on flying a fair distance away from both the river and the Blue Spirit. Katara didn't question it; she still had the feeling that she was in trouble. Finally, when the sun was starting to sink in the western sky, they stopped by a lake, just as they had the night after they rescued Katara.<p>

Aang airbended himself down from the saddle. "I'm guessing you want me to go find firewood?" he said, only half joking.

"Yeah, if you don't mind," Sokka said candidly.

Aang grunted and walked away, going further down the shore.

Katara started unloading their belongings from Appa's saddle. Her movements were slower than usual, and she had a pensive, melancholy look about her.

"You gave him your necklace, didn't you?"

Katara pivoted, startled. It took her a moment to realize what he was talking about.

Sokka explained, "When we came to rescue you from Zuko, you left your necklace behind for him."

Katara smiled wryly. "Very astute. You actually paid attention."

"I've been known to do that sometimes." Sokka half-smiled.

"Are you mad at me?" Katara asked softly.

Sokka shook his head. "No, not really. I guess … not as much as I was at first."

"So you're not going to kill Zuko?"

Sokka hesitated. Katara looked at him sharply. "Sokka, all feelings aside, he's just a teenager, and he's not _evil_ –"

"Okay!" Sokka held up his hands peacefully. "Maybe I wouldn't complain if he died; but I won't make it a priority to kill him. How's that?"

Katara rolled her eyes, sighing and smiling at the same time. She supposed that might be the best response she could ask for from Sokka.

"Aside from the whole – _romance_ thing – what bothers me is, well, the fact that you kept it secret. We're in a war here, and I need to be able to trust you, and trust your judgment. I mean – you're not going to try to help him now, are you? Or run off to go on secret dates?"

"Of course not. I can't control my feelings, but I _can_ control how I act on them."

"Good. That's reassuring," Sokka said seriously. He paused, and when he spoke, there was genuine curiosity in his voice. "So … how did it happen? I mean, you were his prisoner – those aren't exactly the most favorable circumstances. What changed? When did you suddenly start liking each other?"

Katara was silent for a long moment. Sokka rightly guessed that she was remembering; but she was also judging what she could tell him, without feeling like she was betraying Zuko's confidence. "It wasn't _sudden_. It was gradual, I think … but then, the storm was kind of a turning point." She hesitated. "I talked a lot with his uncle, General Iroh. He … told me things about Zuko … I can't tell you all of it, but I learned there's more to him than meets the eye. And then, we had to work together during the storm. I saw him risk his life to save someone in his crew. And I learned that we have more in common than I'd realized." She paused, glancing sideways at her brother. "He lost his mother, too."

Sokka was silent, absorbing all of this. Katara could tell he was taking a great effort to look at it from her point of view.

"You ask heavy questions." Katara paused. "So, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"It's about the guy who helped us. What'd you call him – the Blue Spirit?" She watched Sokka's reaction; he froze for just a moment, then set his jaw, all with a neutral expression.

"You're not going to tell me who he is, are you?" she said.

"You've got your secrets, I've got mine," Sokka said smoothly.

"But now you know my secret. It's not fair if you have one now."

"I'm sorry. I can't tell you … not today." Someday he'd explain that it was to spare her feelings, the way she had tried to spare his and Aang's; but if he said that now, she'd probably figure out who he was talking about.

Katara studied him for a moment. "Is it one of those things where 'I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you'?"

"Not exactly … it's just, I don't think it's my secret to divulge. He doesn't want people to know. And you might be better off not knowing."

"Does Aang know?"

"I'm not sure." Sokka frowned, looking slightly puzzled. "I want to ask him about that, actually."

They glanced at Aang, who had paused in collecting firewood and was standing by himself on the shore, looking out at the setting sun.

"I'll talk to him," Sokka assured her. Katara nodded gratefully and turned back to setting up the tent.

Aang heard Sokka come up behind him, but didn't turn to look. "I don't understand," he said. "I just don't see why you would go to Zuko – of all people – to help rescue the two people he wants, Katara and me."

"I wasn't happy about it," Sokka said with an edge to his voice, "but let's face it, Aang: I didn't stand a chance at breaking you guys out by myself. But Aang, what do you know about this 'Blue Spirit'?"

Aang was silent. He knew the secret was already out, but it was hard for him to admit another good thing that Zuko had done.

Sokka seemed to understand. Aang and Zhao had both seen the Blue Spirit previously. "That wasn't the first time he's rescued one of us, is it? Besides Katara, I mean."

"It was when you were sick," Aang explained sheepishly. "I left to find medicine – yes, I mean that frog," he said before Sokka could interject. "Zhao captured me and had me chained up, and it was Zuko who came and rescued me. That's when I followed Zuko and found out where his ship was docked, so we could rescue Katara."

"So you've _both_ been fraternizing with the enemy?" Sokka exclaimed.

Aang laughed, showing some of his usually lighthearted nature again. "Welcome to the club," he said, bending down to pick up a dry branch they could burn. "Remember, you went to him for help today."

"Well – I guess all three of us are even."

Aang looked askance at him. "Did you know about all this – about Katara and Zuko?"

"I _suspected,"_ Sokka insisted. "I thought there might have been something going on with them – I just didn't know how serious it was, or whether it was reciprocated."

"So what do you think of it now?"

"I don't doubt that he cares about her," Sokka said grudgingly. "I just don't know how that compares to how much he cares about his honor, and his family, and the Fire Nation. I mean, he's attacked us, and her, since the time when she was on his ship. It looks as though he's choosing you over her," he said, almost jokingly.

"Well, I'm flattered," Aang said sarcastically.

"I'm … glad you can joke about it."

Aang grunted. He kicked at the sand absently. "What does she see in him?" he said suddenly.

Sokka shrugged. "I only have guesses." He stooped down and picked up a flat, smooth stone, turning it in his hand. "Remember what I said about being aloof?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Zuko does a pretty good job at it." Sokka flicked his wrist, and the stone skipped across the surface of the water. "And I guess he's older. He's a powerful bender …"

Aang snapped the branch in half. _Oh, slush …_

"And I guess being a prince doesn't hurt," Sokka said blandly. Aang growled and walked a few paces away. Sokka frowned, and followed him. "What's up?"

Aang rounded on him. "You said she liked me back!"

Sokka blinked, not understanding. "What?"

"When we were in Makapu Village. I asked you for girl advice, and you said you thought she liked me back."

Sokka looked at him a moment longer, before he slowly understood. "Oohhh. You were talking about Katara then?"

Aang frowned. "Yeah. Who did you think I was talking about?"

"That girl, Meng."

Aang stared at Sokka. Then the two of them suddenly burst out laughing.

Katara came over to them, slightly bewildered by the change in their moods. "Are you guys okay?"

When they had both calmed down, Aang sighed. "I'm gonna be fine."

"Good. I'm glad." Katara put her hand on his shoulder, smiling at him. Aang returned it halfheartedly. Then Katara pulled him into a hug, and beckoned to Sokka to join them.

Aang held on to her as tightly as he dared. It occurred to him that in a way, he was luckier than Zuko. Katara had chosen _him. _And even if she didn't want to be "together," Aang was still glad to have Katara as a friend.

* * *

><p>Zuko leaned his arms on the railing, on the deck where he had kissed Katara.<p>

By silent agreement, neither he nor Sokka had told Katara the identity of the Blue Spirit. It was for her own good, Zuko thought – this way she wouldn't get her hopes up about him.

Maybe someday her brother or the Avatar would tell her the truth; or maybe she would find out for herself, somehow. The truth didn't stay hidden forever – he knew that now.

_You don't deserve her_. Zuko's own words rang in his ears. He was being his usual, angry, impulsive self when he said that. Now, he felt like a hypocrite.

Katara deserved someone who actually made her happy, and who would help her in any and every way.

Iroh approached him cautiously. "Are you all right?" he asked softly.

"Yeah. I'm fine."

Iroh knew better than to ask for details, especially where Katara was concerned.

"You did a noble thing today," Iroh told him.

"I'm not looking for compliments, Uncle," Zuko said.

"Well, you just found something you weren't looking for," Iroh replied. "In any event … I'm proud of you, Zuko."

The banished prince looked at his uncle with slight surprise. "You are?"

Iroh nodded. "You know how to love."

Zuko looked away, hiding a smile. It was strange, he reflected, that Iroh's opinion of him made him feel so good, when it was his father's approval that he was working so hard to get. But then, he supposed, that was just another example of finding what you weren't looking for.


	22. The Siege of the North

_Published March 16, 2012. Have a happy Saint Patrick's Day!_

* * *

><p>On the other hand, I'm relieved that we can stop the pretense of being friends. Obviously, whatever thin connection we'd foolishly formed has been severed. And high time, too. The Games begin in two days, and trust will only be a weakness. Whatever triggered Peeta's decision – and I suspect it had to do with my outperforming him in training – I should be nothing but grateful for it. Maybe he's finally accepted the fact that the sooner we openly acknowledge that we are enemies, the better. ~ Suzanne Collins, <em>The Hunger Games<em>

* * *

><p>"You know, it's really fortunate that I got my necklace back before we came here," Katara said thoughtfully. When she thought about everything that had happened because of it, all the hands that had held the necklace, it seemed like destiny weaving its strange pattern through their lives.<p>

Sokka rolled over in his sleeping bag and squinted at her with skepticism. "You think Pakku accepted you just because you're his ex-girlfriend's granddaughter?"

"Well – because she wouldn't conform to what people expected of her, and neither will I."

"So I guess your showing off with waterbending had nothing to do with it," Sokka said sarcastically.

Katara pretended to be shocked. "Was that almost coming close to a compliment from my brother?"

Sokka grunted noncommittally.

"Hey, I've been meaning to ask you. How are things going with you and Yue?" Katara asked conversationally.

Sokka scratched his head, looking uncertain and just slightly embarrassed. "I don't know. I mean, we both like each other, but we know we can't be together that way. … I think," Sokka said quietly, "I'm starting to understand how you and Zuko feel about each other."

Katara said nothing, just stared up at the ice ceiling.

"Well, at least you and Yue are on the same side," Katara said, her eyes downcast. "You can still see her, talk to her, even be friends with her. Me – whatever I do to help Aang hurts Zuko, and vise versa."

"Actually, I've been wondering about that," Sokka said seriously. "It's been a while since we saw Zuko, or even Zhao. We've been here a couple weeks; the three of us have never gone that long without running into some conflict. Aren't we kind of overdue to be attacked?"

* * *

><p>For some reason, Zuko had the feeling that this might be his last capture attempt for a while. Maybe it was because of the pending attack. It wasn't just three small groups dodging each other; now there were two major opponents fighting each other, and one person trying to outsmart both.<p>

A single person could penetrate the Water Tribe city more easily than a whole fleet of ships. Not that it was _easy_; the water was freezing, and Zuko came close to drowning, trapped under the ice. But he made it into the city, and found the Avatar. He was even lucky (a rare quality for him) enough to find him when he was in a catatonic meditation; he wouldn't put up a fight. But the boy wasn't alone. Zuko stopped in his tracks when he saw who his adversary was to be.

Katara.

He wasn't surprised to see her. He had known that if he found the Avatar, he was likely to find her at some point. Still, that didn't stop his stomach from clenching.

_If you try to capture Aang, I won't hesitate to attack you_.

He would have to fight her, to get to him. And maybe it would be less painful for her, if he kept up the façade of enmity – if you could call it a façade. But he didn't want to hurt her in a fight.

This was just _not_ his night.

The other Water Tribe girl started to walk away. "Maybe we should get some help."

"No, he's my friend," Katara said confidently. "I'm perfectly capable of protecting him."

"Well, aren't you a big girl now?"

Katara's heart jumped when she heard the voice. "No," she said fearfully.

"Yes."

Katara turned and saw Zuko standing on one of the footbridges. She gasped; his face was bruised and burned, making him look more menacing than ever. "What happened to you?"

"Zhao sent the pirates to assassinate me," Zuko said emotionlessly. "But I'm not that easy to get rid of."

Zuko and Katara faced each other for a long, tense moment. This was the kind of situation they had worried about. Their past affiliation had changed the way they thought about each other. That was dangerous for both of them, since they were supposed to be fighting against each other. Now Katara didn't know whether she wanted to hug Zuko or encase him in ice.

Zuko took a step forward. "Hand him over, and I won't have to hurt you."

Katara's expression was neutral as she stepped protectively between Aang and Zuko. "You know I won't. If nothing's changed for you, then – nothing's changed for me." She was surprised at how truthful these words were.

"I told you all along that I wasn't going to stop," Zuko reminded her, slowly walking over to her. "Try to understand – he's my only hope."

"He's _my_ only hope, too," Katara said, raising her voice. Why couldn't this boy realize that the world needed the Avatar to end the war, far more than Zuko needed him to regain his honor and home?

"I will _not_ be allowed to live in peace until I bring the Avatar to my father!" Zuko shouted, flames licking his clenched fists. "Can you not understand that?"

"I understand it," she said calmly, "I just don't agree with it."

"I don't want to do this, Katara."

"I _won't_ let you take him," she said, her voice intense. She almost sounded like Zuko, when he had refused to let Zhao take custody of her.

"So be it." Zuko leaped forward and punched several fire blasts at Katara, who summoned water from the pond to block them.

Forgotten, frightened, and not knowing how else she could help, Yue turned and ran across the other footbridge, heading back toward the exit.

Zuko tried to ignore the grace with which Katara moved, and the sureness of her movements. She seemed to have gained some confidence since the last time they fought each other in a duel. She managed not only to block his attacks, but also to take the offensive and knock him down.

"You've improved," he noted, equally impressed and annoyed, as he got back to his feet. "But I didn't come all this way to lose to you."

He realized it was a very close fight, as they exchanged blows and she sent him stumbling backward, before bending a churning sphere of water and freezing it around him. He hated seeing that smug, self-satisfied expression on her.

The ice muffled Zuko's voice. "I take it you succeeded. You found a master, didn't you?" As he finished saying this, the ice started to glow red and shake. A moment later the sphere broke, and Zuko released a wave of fire as he leaped out.

It was strange fighting at such close range. They seemed to release all their anger, including their anger toward each other, in the fight. Zuko managed to get past Katara, and had his hand on Aang's collar before Katara swept him off his feet and froze him against the ice wall over ten feet high.

With that, Katara thought that she had won; and Zuko let her think so. As she turned back to watch over Aang, the rising sun shed light into the Oasis. Zuko could feel its energy fueling the fire in his veins. With renewed determination, he breathed steam, melting the ice around him. Then he slid down and charged at Aang, just as Katara was turning around.

Katara started to stream water from the Oasis, but she had been caught off guard and reacted too slowly. Zuko's fire blast hit her and knocked her back against the tree; she hit her head, before she fell forward again, and lay limply on the ground.

For a moment Zuko was genuinely scared. It would be one thing if Katara died; it would be another thing if Zuko was the one to kill her.

Zuko knelt down and gently turned Katara over on her back. She blinked up at him, dazed, her blue eyes shining with tears, her heart pounding with fear for both herself and Aang. Zuko exhaled, relieved, but Katara thought he was just sighing.

Zuko reached out and gently brushed a strand of hair out of her face. "I am not allowed to go home without him," he said in a low voice. He realized that if he succeeded in capturing the Avatar today, then this was the last time he would ever see the waterbender girl. Zuko cupped the side of her face in his right hand. "I'm sorry." The last thing Katara was aware of before she slipped into unconsciousness was Zuko pressing his lips gently to her forehead.

* * *

><p>Later, Yue berated herself for running away; but what could she have done if she stayed? Nothing – she couldn't fight. All she could do was find help.<p>

It was actually providential that Sokka hadn't gone on the mission to infiltrate Zhao's fleet. Yue found him at the weaponry and described what had just happened.

"You left Katara alone with him?" Sokka exclaimed. Before Yue could stammer an answer, he added, "Never mind; I'm sorry. Just show me the way."

They boarded Appa, and Yue pointed him in the direction of the Oasis.

"So who is he?" she asked.

"He's bad news," Sokka said. "His name's Zuko, and he's the Fire Lord's son."

"So he's with the Fire Nation invaders?"

"No, he's more desperate, and he's operating alone."

Yue had a feeling there was more that Sokka wasn't telling her, but she decided that she didn't need details now. She directed him to where the Oasis could be entered from above, where the icecap and the city carved into it. They spotted Katara getting to her feet, but Aang was gone.

"What happened?" Sokka demanded. "Where's Zuko? Did he hurt you?" There was no mistaking the anger in Sokka's voice.

"No. But he took Aang – too him right out from under me." Her voice was sad and regretful, almost ashamed.

Yue voiced what they were all thinking. "Where did they go?"

The question was met with silence.

Katara kneeled on the ground, in almost the same spot where Aang had been meditating. "I can't believe I lost him." She had failed both of them, Zuko and Aang; but Aang had been counting on her – she had said that she could protect him, but she wasn't able to do even that.

"You did everything you could," Sokka said, his voice reasonable and serious. Katara looked over her shoulder at her brother. "And now we have to do everything we can. Zuko can't have gotten far. We'll find him," he said, with more resolve than confidence. "Aang's going to be fine."

Katara got up slowly. "Okay." She pulled her fur coat back on, and climbed after the others onto Appa.

The Water Tribe trio searched from sunrise to sunset. They took turns trying to sleep in the saddle; they had been awake for at least twenty-four hours now, and they would most likely need their strength for the new day and coming night. They all felt guilty for having left the battle for so long; they were needed back there.

They did make one disheartening discovery: a sort of canyon where the ice had very recently cracked, revealing freezing water underneath. They landed for a moment, and Sokka took a look around. It seemed that Aang and Zuko had passed through there, but there was no sign were still nearby.

Sokka turned back to Appa and shook his head at the girls. Katara's eyes were wide with fear; then she bowed her head, trying to hide the look of despair coming over her.

"I don't get it," Katara said a short while later. "Where is he going? Zuko lost his ship and crew; he has Aang, but no way of taking him to the Fire Nation." Iroh had been right, Zuko was impulsive, never thinking things through …

"Don't worry! Prince Zuko can't be getting too far in this weather," Yue said.

"I'm not worried that they'll get away in the blizzard," Katara said grimly. "I'm worried that they _won't_."

"They're not going to die in this blizzard," Sokka insisted, looking over his shoulder at them from where he sat with the reins. "If there's one thing we know about Zuko, it's that he never gives up. They'll survive – and we'll find them," he promised.

It was a testament to the dire circumstances that Sokka was the optimistic, determined one while Katara was worried and unconvinced. It used to be the other way around.

"Katara?" Yue was so quiet that she almost didn't hear her over the whistle of the snow-laced wind.

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry I left you back there," Yue apologized, avoiding her eyes.

"Don't be," Katara said gently. "It's good that you found Sokka and Appa. Besides, if you'd stayed, Zuko might have hurt you too." But Yue didn't look as though she felt any better. "Really, Yue, it's nothing to feel bad about," Katara assured her.

"I'm not," Yue said. "I just –" She broke off, but Katara waited patiently for her to go on. "I wish I was like you. Maybe it's petty, but …"

Katara looked at her in amazement. "You envy me?" It seemed strange, as Princess Yue was the one with a higher level of culture and social status.

"A little," Yue admitted. "You're fearless. And I've seen your waterbending – you have such amazing power. Me … I was helpless, back there. And even Sokka – he may make mistakes, but he's really brave."

"I think you could be brave, if you needed to be," Katara said.

"Well, thank you," Yue said, not sounding entirely convinced.

"I think there are different kinds of bravery," Katara went on. "I mean, it takes one type of courage to stand up and fight; it takes another to leave behind your home and travel to the other side of the world."

"Are you talking about yourself, or your grandmother?"

Katara smiled, just a little. "Both, I guess."

Yue remembered what Katara had said, when she learned that her grandmother had walked away from an arranged marriage. _It must have taken a lot of courage_.

Now Yue was in almost the same position, except that as a princess she had the weight of the Tribe on her shoulders.

What was the brave thing to do? Wouldn't it take courage to marry someone she didn't love? Or was she being a coward by giving in?

The snowfall gradually lessened, and then stopped completely. They could see the moon rise, and then another source of light appeared in the sky. Katara saw it first: a blue streak like a comet, which disappeared somewhere in the wasteland that lay ahead and to the right of them.

"Look! That's got to be Aang!" Katara felt hope revived in her as Sokka steered Appa in the direction of the light.

"What will we do when we find them?" Yue asked.

"I'll deal with Zuko." Katara felt more resolute now; and she would have the advantage, since the full moon had risen and Zuko would be tired from his long trek through the tundra.

Very soon they came upon the place, a sort of stone cave that made a decent shelter. They found Zuko outside, menacingly holding up a bound Aang.

"Appa!" Aang sounded overjoyed.

The bison landed in the fresh snow, and Katara was the first one to come down. Zuko scowled and tossed Aang down to the side. "Here for a rematch?" Zuko asked, making it sound almost like a challenge.

"Trust me, Zuko, it won't be much of a match," Katara retorted.

Sokka whistled. "Good choice of words!"

But Katara wasn't listening; she had to block Zuko's fire with an ice shield. Then she bended a column of snow up under Zuko, then dropped him. Neither Sokka nor Aang could deny that they felt a rush of satisfaction watching Katara knock out Zuko.

Sokka hurried over and cut through Aang's bonds with his boomerang. "Hey, this is some quality rope!" he observed.

Aang stood up. "Thanks guys!" he said, glancing around at all of them – Sokka, Katara, Yue and Appa.

"Are you all right?" Katara asked.

"I'm fine. We need to get to the Oasis! The spirits are in trouble!"

Sokka and Aang hurried over to Appa, then noticed Katara still on the ground. She put her hands under Zuko's arms and started to drag him toward the bison. "What are you doing?" Sokka asked.

"We can't leave him here," Katara insisted.

"Sure we can." Sokka said. "Let's go."

"No," Aang agreed, getting down to assist Katara. "If we leave him, he'll die."

"It's nothing personal, Sokka," Katara assured him, "just humanity." Aang helped her bring Zuko into Appa's saddle. Yue scooted away to make room for him.

"Yeah, this makes a lot of sense," Sokka said sarcastically. "Let's bring the guy who's constantly trying to capture you." There was no love lost between him and Zuko.

"We wouldn't be here if it weren't for him," Aang insisted, his grey eyes pleading with Sokka.

Katara thought she knew what he meant, but actually she understood only part of it.

She glanced at the unconscious prince lying near her. For a moment, she wondered if she should heal his cuts and bruises; but the presence of Aang, Sokka, and Yue changed her mind. Besides, she didn't owe him anything, especially after what he had done tonight.

She felt Sokka's eyes on her, gauging her emotions, or lack thereof. She quickly averted her gaze from the prisoner.

They had spent the whole day looking for Aang. It would take an hour or two to get back to the city. Now that the blizzard was over, the clouds had parted to reveal a full moon, so they had a better sense of direction.

Suddenly, so suddenly that some almost missed it as they blinked when it happened, the sky and everything below it turned a red tint. Yue groaned and pressed her hand to her forehead.

"What's wrong?" Sokka said at once.

"I feel faint," Yue said.

"I feel it too," Aang said from Appa's head. "The Moon Spirit is in trouble."

Yue looked down at the saddle. "I owe the Moon Spirit my life," she said.

"What do you mean?" Sokka asked.

"When I was born, I was very sick and weak." She had never told anyone the story, as she had never met any strangers before the Avatar and his friends; but now she felt the need to tell them. It was strange, telling them something about herself that she didn't even remember. She had to imagine it as much as they did.

"Most babies cry when they're born; but I was born as if I were asleep, my eyes closed. Our healers did everything they could. They told my mother and father I was going to die. My father pleaded with the spirits to save me. That night, beneath the full moon, he brought me to the Oasis and placed me in the pond. My dark hair turned white, I opened my eyes and began to cry – and the knew I would live.

"That's why my mother named me Yue … for the moon."

Katara and Sokka looked at her with awe and new respect. No wonder Yue had such reverence for the Moon and Ocean Spirits, and had thought to show them the Oasis.

"What if … something were to happen to the Moon Spirit?" Katara asked hesitantly. "We waterbenders wouldn't be able to bend, would we? It would be that much easier for the Fire Nation to conquer the Water Tribes."

"The tides would be out of whack," Sokka realized. "Sea levels would rise, not to mention more storms, maybe tsunamis. I guess that would hurt the Fire Nation; the country's just a bunch of volcanic islands, they'd be submerged. I'd like to see that," he added as an afterthought.

Katara and Yue shot him withering looks.

"I'm not sure what might happen," Aang spoke up grimly, "and I hope we won't have to find out."


	23. Apologies

_Published April 3, 2012. Edited July 13, 2014._

"Apologies"

Within a few seconds, he had felt almost simultaneously, almost mingled, all possible emotions. The words of this disinterested man had alternately pierced his heart like icicles and fiery blades. When he learned that it was not over, he drew a deeper breath, but he could not have said whether it was from satisfaction or pain. ~ Victor Hugo, _Les Misérables_

* * *

><p>Zuko regained consciousness about the same time that they arrived at the Spirit Oasis; Katara and her friends didn't notice him because they had their hands full. He quickly set to work burning the ropes, charring them just enough so that he could break through; but he remained hidden in the saddle, listening as he worked.<p>

"Don't bother!" Zhao held held up a fist, poised to strike the bag holding the captive koi fish.

Seeing that the spirit was in danger, Aang immediately dropped his staff and held up his hands in a peaceful gesture. "Zhao, don't," he pleaded.

"You don't know what you're doing!" Katara exclaimed.

"Yes I do! It's my destiny … to destroy the moon … and the Water Tribe."

"Are you suicidal?" Sokka demanded, almost sounding serious. Unfortunately, they didn't have time to give Zhao a lesson on astronomy and the tides.

"Destroying the moon won't hurt just the Water Tribe," Aang said, his voice a gentle but insistent warning. "It will hurt everyone – including you. Without the moon, everything would fall out of balance. You have no idea what kind of chaos that would unleash on the world."

"Don't underestimate us," Katara said, subtly reminding him of all the times he had done so. Zhao fixed his glare on her for a moment; she looked back steadily, daring him.

"Listen to them, Zhao," a new but familiar voice said.

Katara turned, just as surprised as everyone else. "General Iroh," Katara and Zhao said at the same time.

"Why am I not surprised to discover your treachery?" Zhao mused sarcastically.

"I'm no traitor, Zhao" Iroh said, pulling his hood down. "The Fire Nation needs the moon too. We all depend on the balance."

Katara would have smiled if not for the dire circumstances they were in. Then Iroh said, in the stern voice of a master and a former officer, "Whatever you do to that spirit, I'll unleash on you tenfold! _Let it go, now!_"

Zhao locked eyes with Iroh; then Zhao's resolve seemed to melt. He kneeled down and released the koi fish back into the Oasis. The red light vanished and everything went back to its normal coloring. It seemed as though they had won, but Yue, who was still sitting in Appa's saddle, felt like it was too easy.

Then, a wild, mad look entered Zhao's eyes; he stood and, shouting with rage, brought his hand down in a slicing motion, sending fire through and over the water.

"NO!" More than one person shouted or screamed, but there was nothing they could do. The white koi fish, Tui, lay dead in the pond; at almost the same instant, the moon vanished from the sky, leaving everything below in darkness.

Color only appeared briefly in the light from Iroh's fire as he attacked Zhao and his accompanying soldiers. Katara had never seen Iroh use violence before. But now, he was every inch the Dragon of the West, a formidable opponent and fearsome master of his element. He easily knocked down several firebenders and frightened the others into running away; even Zhao hesitated only a moment before fleeing the Oasis.

Yue quickly climbed down from Appa's saddle. Zuko, who had just finished freeing himself, chose that moment to go up to the group. As he had just witnessed his uncle side with the Avatar and stand up against that coward Zhao, he made no move to attack now.

Iroh gently lifted the koi fish's carcass out of the water. He looked at Aang, his eyes full of sorrow and something that might have been an apology – for his own lack of action, or for the actions of his people.

Katara raised her hands in a fluid motion, looking intensely at the Spirit Oasis, but the water did not stir. "I – I can't bend it," she whispered. Then it hit her: "I'll never waterbend again." Her throat felt tight, and she could feel tears coming. She had so wanted to be a master waterbender, and she had gotten her wish, only to have her ability itself taken from her.

"There's no hope now." Yue closed her eyes, leaning into Sokka. "It's over."

Aang shook his head and closed his eyes, with an expression of sadness and controlled anger. Then his eyes and tattoos started to glow white. "No, it's not over," he vowed, his words echoing with the voices of a thousand Avatars before him.

Aang walked forward, wading into the pond. Katara made to follow him, but Iroh held out a hand to stop her. Aang stood in the middle of the water, his hands clasped as though in meditation, looking down on the black koi fish, La. The fish's eyes and the white mark on his back began to glow, similar to Aang's markings. The pond glowed bright white; then Aang seemed to sink down, disappearing under the water.

The five who stood on the shore watched in awe as the water around the island glowed with a incandescent blue color tinged with white. The glowing water moved like a living creature, gathering strength and rising in size. It came to its full height above the wall the separated the sanctuary from the city. They could see Aang in the Ocean Spirit's center, surrounded by the blue sphere characteristic of the Avatar State. Together, they were awesome, terrible, and beautiful. They left the sanctuary, traveling through the city via the canals.

Aang was solving the short-term problem, driving out the Fire Nation from the North Pole. But there was still a long-term problem, the fact that there was no moon.

Iroh kneeled down and placed the dead koi fish back in the sacred water.

"It's too late," Katara said gently. "It's dead."

Zuko cautiously took her hand in his. "I'm so sorry, Katara."

Katara pulled her hand away, glaring at the Fire Prince. "This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't taken Aang! Then we would have been here all along, and we could have stopped Zhao!"

Zuko stared at her, looking wounded. "Now do you see why we need him?" Katara demanded, gesturing toward the city where Aang was guiding the Ocean Spirit's manifestation. Zuko didn't answer.

Iroh glanced over at Yue. "You have been touched by the Moon Spirit," he said, sounding surprised.

Yue looked up at him. Her eyes were still pale blue, though all other color was gone. "Yes," she said. "It gave me life, when I was a child."

"Then there's still a chance." The four teenagers stared at Iroh, who explained, "You can give your life back to the spirits."

"Don't listen to him, he's Fire Nation," Sokka said, grabbing Yue's arm.

The others seemed to ignore him. "Nothing is ever truly lost," Iroh said.

Yue looked back at Iroh, a confused expression on her face. "Is it mine to give, if I choose?"

Iroh was silent a moment before answering. "There are reasons each of us are born. And we have to find those reasons."

Sokka stared at Yue, who looked close to tears, but somehow resigned, as though coming to a decision. "This _is_ the reason I was born," she realized.

"No!" Sokka exclaimed. "You don't have to do that!"

"It's my duty, Sokka. There is no love without sacrifice."

"I won't let you!" he said fiercely. "Your father told me to protect you!"

"My people are dying, Sokka. Those put in charge of others have a responsibility. It's time we show the Fire Nation we hold our beliefs just as dearly as they hold theirs."

Zuko glanced at Katara, but she refused to look at him; she was trying to maintain her composure, though she might have been close to tears. They both understood all too well how Yue felt about loyalty to her people. That was one of the reasons they couldn't be together.

Yue reached behind her neck and took off her betrothal necklace. She pressed it into Sokka's gloved hand. "Give this to my father. Tell him I love him." Sokka tried to hold her back, but Yue pulled her hand away.

Yue stood and placed her hands on Tui's body while Iroh held it out. A white light emanated from the fish. She closed her eyes, concentrating. The others could almost hear a _whoosh_ as her life force left her body and returned to the Moon Spirit. Then Yue fainted, breathing her last.

"No!" Sokka reached out to catch Yue's body in his arms. He placed a hand on her cheek; there was no breath coming out, no rise or fall of her chest. "She's gone." Sokka bowed his head, holding her close. "She's gone."

Zuko was surprised to find that he felt sympathy for the boy. If Sokka had felt for that girl what Zuko felt for Katara – he could easily imagine how he would feel if Katara died, especially if he wasn't able to stop it.

Then something even stranger happened: Yue's body seemed to dissipate, vanishing from a stunned Sokka's arms. Then the light returned to the koi fish; Iroh quickly placed it back in the water, and it swam around his partner, falling back into their eternal dance. The small pond glowed white; then the light came together in the center, and rose up like smoke forming a shape.

It was Yue. She looked freer and more beautiful than any of them had seen her in life. She was translucent, radiant as the moon.

"Good-bye Sokka." Her voice was like a whisper on the wind. She leaned down to cup his face in her transparent hands. "I'll always be with you," she promised, and then kissed him. Sokka started to kiss her back, but she was already fading away; he was trying to kiss someone who wasn't really there, who didn't belong in this world. As suddenly as Yue had come back, she was gone. Then, the moon reappeared in the sky, and the color returned to everything.

The Oasis was silent for a long moment. They all felt that they had just witnessed something sacred, and weren't sure what to do now.

Zuko stood up suddenly.

"Where are you going?" Katara asked.

"I have some unfinished business," Zuko said flatly. "And I'm not talking about the Avatar." He glanced at the koi fish, and Sokka's mournful expression. "Zhao will pay for this," he promised. Then Zuko turned and ran over the bridge, exiting the Spirit Oasis.

Katara watched him leave. Then she suddenly stood up and started to run after him.

"Katara!" Sokka leapt to his feet, but she was already too far ahead; he couldn't stop her. Sokka watched her leave with a sad, worried expression.

"They'll be all right," Iroh assured him. He knew, better than anyone, that the real danger had passed.

Sokka turned to Iroh with a broken expression. "How could you ask her to do that?" he asked, his voice cracking. "You know, for a moment I thought you … and even Zuko …" Sokka's face and voice turned hard. "Well … I was obviously wrong."

"I was trying to do what was best for the world," Iroh said. His expression was sad, his tone sincere. "I regret that the girl had to do that –"

Sokka turned away. "Just go."

Iroh stood there for just a moment, looking at him with the sympathy only a person who has lost someone they loved can feel. "I'm sorry," he said. Sokka didn't answer. Knowing he had overstayed his visit to a sacred place, Iroh turned and left Sokka to mourn in peace.

After a moment Sokka finally turned to look behind him; but Iroh was gone, as well as Aang, Yue, Zuko, and Katara.

Despite Yue's reassurance, he had never felt more alone in his life.

* * *

><p>Katara followed Zuko from a slight distance, without his noticing. She knew she was being almost as reckless as he, but, in spite of everything, she wanted to make sure he didn't get himself killed.<p>

She saw Zuko aim a blast of fire downward to a lower tier of the ice plaza.

Zhao was more incredulous than shocked. "You're alive?"

"You tried to have me killed!" Zuko released another wave of fire, but Zhao rolled on the parapet to avoid it.

"Yes, I did," Zhao said venomously, with no hint of remorse. "You're the Blue Spirit, and an enemy of the Fire Nation. You freed the Avatar!"

Katara's mouth dropped open in shock. For a moment she thought Zhao might be mistaken; maybe he had just made a conjecture.

But Zuko simply said, "I had no choice!"

Katara put a hand on the wall, trying to steady herself. She barely saw them fight below her; her mind was spinning, trying to make sense of what she had just discovered.

"You should have _chosen_ to accept your failure, your disgrace," Zhao snarled, doffing his cloak and tossing it aside. "Then at least … you could have lived!" With that, he punched forward again, and the real duel began.

They fought precariously close to the edge; Zuko circled around and leaped over Zhao, but they both fought relentlessly. Katara wondered if they were determined to end it, once and for all.

_Why is Zuko doing this?_ she wondered, remembering what he had said as he left he Oasis. _For me? For himself?_

Zuko somehow forced Zhao over the edge, and he fell down to a lower level. For a moment Zuko stood glaring down at him. "I will _never_ accept failure!" Zuko vowed. "Failure is not an option." He leapt down to resume fighting below.

Katara found that she now had her bending again, and formed a slope down so she could follow. Zuko and Zhao were now exchanging fiery blasts on a bridge over the canal – incidentally, the same bridge where Sokka and Yue had sometimes met. Zhao cried out after receiving a particularly hard blow from Zuko, who then punched out furiously, until the fire knocked Zhao down on his back. That was when he looked up, and realized that the moon was once again in the sky.

"It can't be!" Zhao gasped in horror. What he didn't know was that the spirits had planned for it to be.

Suddenly the water below them swelled up, and Katara recognized part of the Ocean Spirit's essence. She did the only thing that felt fitting, which was to drop to her knees. She bowed her head and closed her eyes. She wasn't going to try to stop her own tribe's spirits. "Just not Zuko," she whispered, pleading. It wasn't much of a prayer, but she didn't have time to articulate much else; it was all she could ask for.

"Take my hand!" she heard Zuko say. Katara opened her eyes and saw that the Ocean Spirit's watery essence had grabbed Zhao and was slowly pulling him off of the ice structure; Zuko jumped onto the parapet and extended his arm toward the trapped man.

Zuko was doing the decent thing, offering Zhao help. But the proud, hateful officer refused to accept it, even if not doing so cost him his life.

Again, Zuko proved to be the bigger of the two.

He could only watch as the Ocean Spirit dragged Zhao under the water – the worst kind of death for a firebender. And then, just like that, he was gone.

Katara tried to wrap her mind around it – the idea that the admiral was dead, no longer a threat to them – but it was hard, especially with the new revelation she was still trying to process.

"It was you." Zuko turned and looked at her, noticing her for the first time. He froze, realizing that she must have heard everything.

Katara stood up and looked at him. "You're the Blue Spirit. You – you saved us."

Zuko nodded wordlessly.

"Why would you do that?"

"I think you know why, Katara."

Katara looked almost mystified. "Am I really that important to you?"

Zuko felt too physically and emotionally drained to smile. "Don't let it get to your head."

"_Am_ I, Zuko?"

He sighed. "Yes." Zuko shook his head, as though still amazed by his own actions. "I swear, Katara, you'll be the death of me."

"That sounds kind of ungrateful, saying that to the person who just this evening saved your life," Katara said, with a hint of sarcasm. "But … why did you hide the fact that it was you?"

"Because …" Zuko looked away. "I didn't want to give you false hope."

Katara stared at Zuko, her expression concerned and touched. Then she turned to look at the newly restored moon. The Fire Navy ships had almost disappeared in the distance. Her mind was still trying to process, to understand, what Zuko had said. Her heart ached anew; she had no idea how to feel about him, between attacking her and rescuing her.

It took Zuko a moment to notice the ragged way she was breathing, as though it was a struggle to breathe normally. "Are you crying?" He sounded incredulous and concerned.

"Of course I'm crying," Katara said, indignant and a little bitter. "I just saw a good friend of mine die. She was my brother's girlfriend – if they got married, she would have been my sister-in-law." Zuko could hear stifled sobs in her voice. "They loved each other, but they couldn't be together, and now they never will." She turned around and looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "I don't want us to end like that," she said.

"Oh, Katara …" Zuko didn't hesitate now; he walked over and embraced her. Katara hugged him back, tilting her face up toward the moon, trying to ignore the stinging in her eyes and throat. Zuko could feel her slightly shaking against him.

She couldn't help thinking, _this_ was the boy she had more or less fallen for. The one who couldn't help caring for others; the one who protected her.

Katara brought her mouth near his ear, almost whispering. "You're a hero, whether you want to admit it or not."

Zuko didn't want to hear that. He was no hero. The Water Tribe girl who had just died was more a hero than he would ever be. No amount of determination or training would enable him to live up to the non-bender's sacrifice.

It was Katara who pulled away first, bowing her head. "Iroh will be looking for you," she said, swiping at her nose. "You need to go – before the other waterbenders find you." She wished she could ask him to stay, to give up his search, maybe even join their group – but it was impossible. Their allies in the Water Tribes and Earth Kingdom would never accept the Fire Lord's son as an ally, and after what had happened here because of his botched kidnapping, Katara wouldn't blame them.

What she said instead was, "I'll never forget you for that."

She could feel Zuko staring at her. Then he spoke up hesitantly. "Is there any chance …?" He didn't finish.

Katara opened her mouth slightly, but no sound came out. Was there any way they could be together? For a moment she actually considered it. Could she leave to be with Zuko? Sokka would understand what she had done. And she had kept her promise to Aang, to get him to the North Pole and learn waterbending with him.

But what would she do with herself if she stuck with Zuko and Iroh? Even if Zuko abandoned – or at least halted – his hunt for Aang, Katara doubted he would want to fight against the Fire Nation.

If she stayed with her friends, she could still find ways to help in the war. She could help Aang find teachers for earthbending and firebending. Maybe she and Sokka could find their father.

She turned and gestured to the half-destroyed city. "Look at what the Fire Nation did here," she said. "They need waterbenders like me. I'm needed here." She still had a duty – to her people, to her family, and to herself.

"Fine."

_Fine?_ What did that mean? That he understood? Or that he didn't care?

Katara didn't have time to discern his response, as he cupped her cheek in his hand, tilting her head up toward his. She could see his cuts and bruises up close now. His expression was sad but accepting. Zuko looked at her for a moment, as though trying to memorize her face.

Katara pressed her lips against Zuko's. They both understood that it was a kiss good-bye, a kiss that held no promise of a future together. It was full of sadness, resignation, and something that had once been longing. For the first time, Katara understood the meaning of the word "bittersweet." When she thought of how he had tried to capture Aang just now, she wanted to pull away, but when she remembered that he had saved her, she wanted to hold him close.

They broke away at the same time, and Zuko turned swiftly and started walking away.

"Zuko."

He stopped and turned to look at her. Katara looked at him with sincere apology. "I'm sorry," she said plaintively.

"So am I," Zuko returned. Then he turned on his heel and walked away. He didn't look back. And Katara didn't go after him.

* * *

><p>The sun and moon together shone down on the Water Tribe city. Half of it was in ruins, but it was still intact, thanks to Aang and Yue.<p>

Sokka found Aang, Arnook, Pakku, and others gathered on the plaza. Arnook looked at him, and their eyes met briefly. Then Arnook bowed his head, seeming to understand.

Sokka followed the chief to the edge of the plaza, facing the ocean and open sky. "Here." He handed Arnook the necklace Hahn had made for Yue. "Yue asked me to return this, and send her love. She …" Sokka swallowed. "She saved us … but I couldn't save her. I … I failed you, and her. I'm so sorry."

"Don't be." Sokka looked up in surprise. Arnook was gazing up at the moon, still visible in the morning sky. "The spirits gave me a vision when Yue was born. I saw a beautiful, brave young woman become the Moon Spirit." He lowered his gaze and closed his eyes sorrowfully. "I knew this day would come."

"You must be proud," Sokka said.

"So proud … and sad."

Sokka realized that Arnook would likely suffer more than he would from Yue's death. Sokka had known her for a few weeks; Arnook had known her all her life.

"You didn't fail either of us," Arnook said, startling him a little. "If it is as you say, you were there when she needed you most. For that, I'm sure, we're both grateful."

Sokka's mind was still spinning a little. Had Arnook taken him off the mission, and placed him in charge of guarding Yue, for a reason? It occurred to Sokka that had he infiltrated the Fire Navy, he wouldn't have been there to search for Aang, or witness Yue's final act act of bravery.

"Are you all right?"

Sokka turned and saw Katara walking up to him, no worse for wear.

Sokka stared. "You … you came back." He wasn't sure if this surprised him or not; he really hadn't known what to expect from her where Zuko was concerned.

Katara nodded, and smiled just a little. "I can't leave you guys. I'm in too deep."

Sokka hesitated. "Did … did Zuko tell you anything …"

"I know the secret," she said flatly. "Zhao mentioned it. Why didn't you tell me?" She sounded more curious than hurt.

"Because I didn't want you to think I was accepting him. And I knew that if _you_ knew he was the one rescuing you, you'd just admire him more. I know, he has good in him, but, Katara, that doesn't negate the bad things he does. He attacked you tonight, and he kidnapped Aang."

Katara exhaled deeply and then nodded, reluctant but agreeing with him. "You didn't answer my first question," she pointed out. "Are you okay? I know I kind of ran out on you, after …" She trailed off.

Sokka shrugged. "I'm doing okay." He supposed that was the truth. Maybe it was because he had known all along that he and Yue couldn't be together. Still, that didn't change the fact that they had lost a dear friend.

He looked up at the moon again, and then at the half-ruined ice city. "I can't stop thinking, if I had done something different … maybe we could have prevented this."

"You can't blame yourself, Sokka." Katara put a hand on his arm. "You did everything you could." Those were the same words Sokka had spoken to Katara, just a day before. She glanced over at Pakku, and then back at Sokka. "I need to talk to Pakku; but you know, I'm here for you, if you need me."

She walked over to her waterbending master. "Pakku – I'm sorry I wasn't out there helping you more."

Pakku shook his head. "You don't need to apologize. I heard what you did."

"Were you and the other warriors all right?"

Pakku turned away, bowing his head slightly. "We lost some benders and soldiers, most of them during … I suppose you could call it a lunar eclipse. You couldn't have helped much then."

"What's going to happen now?" Katara wondered. "Where do we go from here?"

Pakku's answer surprised her. "I've decided to go to the South Pole. Some other benders and healers want to go with me." He turned to face Katara. "It's time we helped rebuild our sister tribe."

"What about Aang?" Katara asked. They both glanced at the boy Avatar, who stood with Momo out over the city. "He still needs to learn waterbending."

"Well," Pakku said with a smile, "then he better get used to calling you 'Master Katara'."

Katara smiled. So she had done it. She had mastered waterbending. But her work wasn't over yet. She found herself happy at the prospect of continuing to travel with Aang and Sokka.

Katara walked over to where Aang stood. He turned when he heard her approach. The two friends looked at each other for a moment. Then they came together and hugged fiercely. There was so much conveyed through that hug. Katara was thanking him for saving the city; Aang was expressing how much he appreciated having friends who supported him, who reminded him why he was fighting.

They heard something chittering, and Katara opened her eyes to see Momo looking up expectantly at them. "You too, Momo," she invited.

"Come here," Aang laughed, extending his arm.

Momo jumped up onto him. Sokka came over and put a hand on Aang's shoulder. The four of them looked out at the great city they had traveled so far to find. Here they had found love and loss, reached old goals and set new ones.

They had come so far from the South Pole. And yet there was still so much to do, to explore, to learn, to seek and to find.

With a rumble, Appa rose up from below and floated next to the parapet, faithfully waiting for orders from his friends. He would take them wherever the winds carried them.

Standing there with Aang, Sokka, Momo, and Appa, Katara knew she had made the right choice. Together they would find their destinies.

But whether Zuko would be a part of that destiny, remained to be seen.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I could end this part of the story now, and post the rest as a sequel; it would make sense because this is kind of the halfway point for how much I've written, which means Book One makes up half the story. But, for simplicity's sake, I'm keeping it all in one story. Have a good Passover and/or Easter, to each his own.


	24. Looking and Finding

_Published April 19, 2012_

**Author's Note:** Why did I want to update today? Because it's the one-year anniversary of when I started posting "Finding What You Weren't Looking For," which was my very first fan fiction story! Perfect time to start chronicling a new season.

One more thing, while I have your attention: Tomorrow is Cover the Night! If you don't already know what that is, then look up the Kony 2012 videos – both of them. Download the posters and put them wherever you can!

**Song:** "I Still Believe" by Hayden Panettiere, from _Cinderella III: A Twist in Time_

* * *

><p>"That's the worst – or the best – of real life, Anne. It <em>won't<em> let you be miserable. It keeps on trying to keep you comfortable – and succeeding – even when you're determined to be unhappy and romantic." ~ L. M. Montgomery, _Anne of Avonlea_

* * *

><p>It was nice traveling with the Water Tribe convoy. Katara, Aang, and Pakku were able to practice waterbending on the open sea. Appa enjoyed transportation that didn't require him to carry everyone. Sokka tried to be productive by training with the few warriors who came to protect the group.<p>

Unlike Katara, Sokka wasn't an emotional person; he wouldn't cry himself to sleep or have deep heart-to-hearts. And in war, there wasn't much time to mourn. On the other hand, this voyage was an opportune time to do so. It gave all of them time to heal, to rest, to prepare for the next step in their quest.

When there was nothing else to do, Sokka would sit on the deck. Aang and Katara knew to give him some space; but sometimes Katara asked if she could sit with him, and he said he didn't care either way. Sometimes they would talk, but more often they sat in companionable silence, contemplating the ocean and the future that lay before them. Katara tried not to think about the last time she had been on a ship at sea.

Overall, they were reasonably happy with Pakku's group. Still, they were happiest traveling with just the three of them plus two pets. Especially after the episode with General Fong.

When they left the stronghold, Aang told his friends what Roku had taught him about the Avatar State. But after that, they didn't talk about the incident much.

Aang did wonder about it, though. Would he have been so desperate, or triggered the Avatar State, if Fong had been threatening someone besides Katara? If it was someone else he loved? He thought this was probably so.

Without his realizing it until now, he had more or less stopped thinking about Katara romantically, after what Sokka now called "the great revelation." Not that he didn't still resent Zuko for it, but the resentment was more instinctive, since Zuko was their enemy.

When Katara had almost been buried alive, it had occurred to her, fleetingly, that she would never see Zuko again, and that he might not find out what had happened to her, but she had also thought of her father and grandmother. Afterwards, she reminded herself that she wasn't living for Zuko; she was living for Aang, and Sokka, and her people.

* * *

><p>The one problem that Aang, Katara, and Sokka had in common, but which they rarely talked about, was trying to put romantic feelings to rest. It was hard – especially when singing nomads shoved constant reminders in their faces.<p>

Katara and Aang were fairly interested in hearing the song and legend, but they exchanged glances with each other and with Sokka when Chong said that the key to getting out of the caves was to believe in love. They were all thinking the same thing: So far, none of them had had much luck with love.

The story of Oma and Shu's forbidden love reminded Katara of the situation with her and Zuko. _"Two lovers, forbidden from one another …"_ They were even separated by a similar cause, a war between their people.

Oma and Shu's story did not have a happy ending. Neither had Sokka and Yue's. Maybe that was part of the reason he was so stubbornly skeptical about Chong's insistence that they had to believe in love.

"_Love shines brightest in the dark_," Katara read, when they had finished deciphering the story written in the tomb.

Aang scratched his head. "Is that like an afterthought? Or is it supposed to help us get out?"

"I don't know," Katara said lamely. "I mean, it's an amazing story, but it doesn't help us now."

"Chong said we just have to believe in love."

"What does that even mean – 'believe in love'?" Katara asked, sounding uncannily like Sokka for a moment. "I mean, love exists in the world. That's a fact. What is there to believe?"

Aang's voice was quiet. "I think it means … whether you believe that love matters, and is worth the trouble, and can turn out all right. I mean – is love worth having, if it only brings heartache?"

Katara looked at him, and there was something in her eyes that he couldn't put a name to. "I believe it is. Even if it doesn't work out – if it was real at all, then you still have good memories and feelings."

Aang looked at her with new respect. Usually he was the one who came up with words of wisdom, or recalled philosophies he had learned from the monks. But Katara, too, was mature beyond her years.

Aang hesitated. "Do you miss Zuko?" he asked softly.

Katara didn't look at him; instead she ran her hand over the inscription. "Sometimes," she admitted. Every now and then, little things reminded her of Zuko, but they were so busy training and traveling that she almost didn't have time to dwell on him.

Finally she answered, "About as much as Sokka misses Yue. I'm sure he's hurting and thinks about her – and will always remember her – but he doesn't let it weigh him down."

Aang glanced back at the characters and pictures carved into the tomb. "All right, your turn – what does 'love shines brightest in the dark' mean?"

"Hmm." Katara had to stop and think for a long moment. "Love shines brightest in the dark," she murmured to herself. She remembered how she had fallen in love with Zuko when she was a prisoner, and how Yue had shown the greatest love when the moon went out, literally during the darkest hour.

"I think it means … love is strongest, or shows itself best, when something bad happens." She paused, wondering if he could understand. "Does that make sense?"

"I think so," Aang said, looking thoughtful. "Maybe it's supposed to be like a riddle …" He paused, and Katara could tell an idea was coming to him. He glanced at her. "Do you trust me?"

"Yes," she said without hesitation.

"Then give me the torch." Katara handed it to him. Aang inhaled deeply, and then blew the light out.

They both blinked in the darkness; then they realized that it wasn't dark. A greenish light shone down from the top of the cave.

"It's made of some kind of crystals," Aang realized. "They must only light up in the dark!"

"That's how the two lovers found each other," Katara said, sounding excited and delighted. "They just put out their lights and followed the crystals." She gestured around them, and then pointed down the tunnel. "That must be the way out!"

The two friends hugged each other. "I'm glad I got trapped with you," Katara said fondly.

"Me too." Aang released her, and then turned. "Race you out!"

Laughing, they ran down the tunnel, with Appa following close behind.

* * *

><p>"So, what exactly did we accomplish by coming here?" Sokka asked no one in particular. After delivering the Fire Nation baby back to the governor, the group had spent the night at the Resistance's camp, before departing in the morning.<p>

"It was a fun adventure," Aang offered, shrugging his shoulders. "Scary, but fun."

Katara spoke up. "I have to admit, it felt good to baby-sit again." The last baby she had seen, before Tom-Tom, was at the South Pole.

"I guess we did evacuate the city," Sokka observed.

"I may have gotten my first earthbending lesson," Aang informed them. "I mean, I already knew about Positive and Negative Jing, but I had no idea there was a third Jing."

"I still don't get what Bumi thinks he's doing," Sokka said stubbornly.

"Maybe you have to be an earthbender to get it?" Aang shrugged. "If he thinks he can reclaim Omashu this way, then I can't argue with him."

"But he's holding you back from learning the next element!"

"Maybe not. Maybe this wasn't meant to be. But he said my teacher would be someone like him – 'someone who listens and waits before striking.'"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sokka asked, curious and a bit skeptical.

"I think I'll know when we find him – or her."

For a short while they flew in silence, not knowing quite where they were going. Like in their search for a waterbending teacher, they had only a general idea of where to find one. So, by silent agreement, they would continue wandering the Earth Kingdom.

After some time, Sokka remembered something. "Hey Katara, what happened to your bending back there?"

Katara's smile vanished. She didn't want to think about it; for her, that had been the most frightening part of their return to Omashu.

"I don't know," she said quietly. That was part of what was scaring her: not knowing.

Sokka hesitated, and then said, "Was it like last time, when Zhao captured you? You said it had to do with emotions, or –"

"No, this time was different. It wasn't just that I was having trouble bending the water. I couldn't _feel_ the water."

Aang turned around to look at her with a concerned expression. "Sounds like your chi was blocked, or something."

"What's _chi_?" Sokka asked.

"You gotta be kidding!" Aang left the reins for a moment and airbended himself up on to the saddle. "Chi is a circulating life force. Most bending is about controlling the direction of chi flowing in your body."

"Yugoda taught us about that, at the North Pole," Katara remembered. "It's an important part of healing, too."

"You know why we had these tattoos?" Aang pointed at his hand and then at his head. "The arrows show the paths of our chi. That's why they light up when I'm in the Avatar State."

"Hold up," Sokka said, raising his hand. "You're saying that girl did something that took away Katara's bending."

"Yes." This answer was met with a brief, slightly stunned silence.

"I hope that doesn't happen again," Katara said finally.

"Hey, it's behind us now," Sokka said, waving his hand dismissively.

* * *

><p>"We just move from one crisis to another," Katara muttered to herself later that day, as she trudged through the swamp. She thought she was bad off then, having been separated from Appa and Momo; but it was even worse when she was later separated from the boys – for the second time running.<p>

"Aang? Sokka?" Katara called out their names every minute or so, not wanting to exhaust her voice. She kept walking, but was worried that by doing so she might end up going in circles.

She thought she saw a figure ahead, but it was too dark and too far away to make out. "Hello?" Katara called out softly. "Hello? Can you help me?" She approached the figure, and as she got closer she thought she could make out Water Tribe clothes, and hair styled like hers, with a bun and blue beads.

"Mom?" Katara said, and then more loudly, "Mom!" She didn't stop to think; she ran ahead, splashing through the swamp water, and reached out to touch the figure's shoulder. "I can't believe –" She stopped, as she turned and saw, instead of her mother's face, a tall tree stump. Katara gasped, first from the realization that it had been an illusion, and then from sobs. She fell to her knees and cried, not bothering to hold it back when the boys weren't with her.

Maybe she would always be like this: she had more or less gotten over the grief of her mother's death, and was able to have a happy, healthy life. But every now and then something would trigger those old emotions, because the fact remained that a vital person in her life was gone, and she was reminded that it would never come back.

"You lost your mother." Katara's head snapped upward, and she was so surprised that she stopped crying. She swiped her tears away and turned around, wary now of anything she might see or hear in this place.

"That's something we have in common." She had heard that voice say those words, once. Katara stood and turned, and then she saw someone standing in the distance, just like before.

She recognized him, but it took a moment to register. He looked shockingly different than he had when she had last seen him: he was wearing threadbare Earth Kingdom garments, and his ponytail was gone, replaced by a thin layer of hair. But there was no mistaking the scar, the pale skin, and his melancholy expression.

"Zuko?" Katara said, almost whispering. She took a cautious step forward, and then another. She felt as sad as he looked.

It was like a very vivid dream: she knew it wasn't real, and yet the image seemed so solid; his voice was exactly as she remembered it.

"Is this another illusion?" Katara murmured, half addressing him.

"Why don't you trust me?" Zuko asked plaintively.

Katara's mouth opened slightly. Her breath almost caught in her throat. She couldn't answer him. She closed her eyes to wipe away another wave of tears; when she blinked and focused, Zuko was gone.

She had been apprehensive before, but now she was truly afraid, and worse, she was alone. Was she going crazy? Could she even trust herself?

* * *

><p>Aang thought the swamp was eerily similar to the Spirit World, full of mist and shadows but somehow beautiful in its own way. His only assurance that he was in the physical world was the fact that his bending worked here.<p>

He did see two figures who could have passed for spirits: a pig-like animal with white wings, and a small, thin girl in white dress. They were standing together on a large earthen mound.

"Hello?" Aang approached cautiously. "Who are you?"

Instead of answering, the girl covered her mouth with her hands and laughed; it was a nice sound. The boar flapped its wings and rose into the air; then the girl turned and ran down the other side of the hill, out of Aang's sight.

"Hey, come back!" Aang shouted, and then airbended himself to the top of the mound. He looked around and saw the phantom girl running on a tree branch a short distance away. Aang leapt up and started swinging from one vine to another to get to the tree; but when he got there, he heard her laughter coming from the ground again. Aang turned his head in surprise; she was running in the area he had just left. How had she gotten there? Maybe she really was a spirit: either she was in many places at once, or she was able to move at lightning speed.

Aang gave chase for some time, but the girl was even more elusive than he was. She was pretty, and her clothes were fine and expensive-looking, but she laughed and moved with almost playful energy. Once, she looked over her shoulder in his general direction, but Aang couldn't tell if she had seen him or not. Was she enjoying having him chase her? Was she teasing or toying with him?

He pulled back a curtain of vines and moss. "Who are you?" he asked, intrigued and just a little frustrated. The girl was standing still now; Aang charged toward her at a run.

The girl turned around, but then Aang realized, too late, that it was actually Katara. Unable to stop, he ran into her, knocking her down and causing the two of them to tumble down the hill. Then they conveniently rolled into Sokka, and the three of them fell down in a pile at the bottom of a tree root.

Sokka was the first to get to his feet. "What do you guys think you're doing?" he exclaimed angrily. "I've been looking all over for you!"

"Well, I've been wandering around looking for you!" Katara retorted, displeased with Sokka's attitude. A relieved "Hello" would have been nice.

Aang airbended himself to his feet. "I was chasing some girl." It took him a moment to realize how strange that sounded.

"What girl?" Katara asked blankly.

Aang helped her up. "I don't know. I heard laughing, and I saw some girl in a fancy dress," he finished, sounding just slightly embarrassed.

"Well, there must be a tea party here and we just didn't get our invitations!" Sokka said.

Katara looked down. "I thought I saw Mom," Katara said she said quietly. The boys looked surprised and concerned. "And then … I saw Zuko. Only he looked different, like I've never seen him before. It was weird."

Sokka didn't like this – the mention of Zuko, or the apparent possibility that they were all losing their minds. Again, he tried to keep everyone reasonable and focused. "Look, we were all just scared, and hungry, and our minds were playing tricks on us. That's why we all saw things out here."

"You saw something too?" Katara asked curiously.

Sokka turned away as he answered. "I thought I saw Yue. But, that doesn't prove anything." He turned back to face them. "Look, I think about her all the time," Sokka said, and surprisingly he wasn't too embarrassed or emotional to admit it. "And you saw Mom and Zuko, two people you miss a lot."

"What about me?" Aang said quizzically. "I didn't know the girl I saw. And all our visions led us right here."

"Okay … so where's here?" Katara said, gesturing around them. "The middle of the swamp?"

"Yeah, the center …" Aang looked up, and saw that they were standing at the base of the largest tree any of them had ever seen. It stood tall, proud, and strong, not unlike an earthbender. "It's the heart of the swamp," Aang realized, sounding excited. "It's been calling us here."

* * *

><p>"So, who are you then?" Katara asked.<p>

The man bent a vine out of their way. "Friends call me Hue. I protect the swamp from folks that want to hurt it. Like this fellow with his big knife."

Instead of apologizing for his behavior, Sokka tried to direct their attention to how he had been right. "See? Completely reasonable. Not a monster, just a regular guy defending his home. Nothing mystical about it."

"Oh, the swamp _is_ a mystical place, all right," Hue said. "It's sacred." Aang thought that must be why it was so similar to the Spirit World.

"I reached enlightenment right here under the banion grove tree." He sat down at the base of the tree trunk. "I hear it callin' me, just like you did."

"Sure ya did," Sokka said sarcastically. "It seems real chatty."

The trio sat down, and Hue lectured like a wise teacher. He reminded Katara of Iroh's patient lessons; for Aang it was like learning from the monks again.

"See, this whole swamp is actually just one tree spread out over miles. Branches spread and sink and take root and then spread some more – one big living organism, just like the entire world."

Aang spoke up, trying to understand. "I get how the tree is one big thing, but, the whole world?"

"Sure. You think you're any different from me? Or your friends? Or this tree? If you listen hard enough, you can hear every living thing breathing together, you can feel everything growing. We're all livin' together, even if most folks don't act like it. We all have the same roots, and we are all branches of the same tree."

Katara wasn't sure what to think of that. It made sense, and it was a nice thought, but it didn't seem like a very practical idea. There were some divisions that proved too strong to overcome, like the divisions of the Four Nations. Too many people believed that those boundaries existed, which convinced more people to abide by them.

The thought of the Four Nations indirectly reminded her of something. "But what did our visions mean?"

"In the swamp we see visions of people we've lost, people we loved …"

_People we've lost_. Katara's heart skipped a beat, and she felt scared for a moment. If she had seen Zuko – did that mean he was dead, like her mother and Yue?

"… folks we think are gone. But the swamp tells us they're not." Katara relaxed at that, feeling a little better. She had probably seen Zuko because she had loved him, not because she had lost him. "We're still connected to 'em. Time is an illusion, and so is death."

"But what about my vision?" Aang said. He looked almost disappointed. "It was someone I had never met."

Hue smiled. "You're the Avatar. You tell me."

Aang thought hard, trying to keep an open mind, and apply what Hue was teaching them. "Time is an illusion … so, it's someone I _will_ meet," he realized.

Hue smiled and winked at him. Aang was surprised at how happy he was to discover this. He wanted to find out who that girl was.

"When I saw Zuko," Katara remembered, "he looked different, like I've never seen him before. So I wasn't seeing him as how I remember him – I saw him the way he'll look in the future." Her eyes lit up with something that might have been hope. "That means – I'll see him again."

Sokka looked at her. "Great," he said sarcastically, stretching out the word.

Aang wasn't surprised by the prospect of seeing Zuko again, but he almost didn't care. His mind was still on his own vision. Who was that girl? Why had he seen her in the swamp? Did it mean he would love that girl – or that he would lose her? Perhaps it meant both. Or maybe neither; maybe it was just a sign that he would meet her, at some point in his life.

Sokka spoke up again. "Sorry to interrupt the lesson, but we still need to find Appa and Momo."

"I think I know how to find them." Aang leaned forward and placed a hand on the tree root. He closed his eyes and focused on the tree, trying to envision it spread across the swamp. "Everything is connected," he murmured. The arrow on his hand glowed, and Sokka and Katara knew he must be doing something with his chi or his Avatar Spirit, or both.

_If you listen hard enough, you can hear every living thing breathing together._ He tried to listen to the earth, and could almost feel his chi traveling through the roots and vines, until it connected with the two animals he loved. And then he could see them, as if in a vision, clearer than a dream: Appa struggling against a net, angry and desperate.

Aang stood up with a new sureness and determination. "Come on, we've got to hurry!"

* * *

><p>By the end of the day, they had found Appa, and made a surprising discovery about the people who had hunted the animals. "You guys are waterbenders!" Katara exclaimed in surprise.<p>

"You too!" The newcomer smiled. "That means we're kin!"

Katara grimaced in vague horror. Aang laughed a little. "It's like he said – you're just branches of the same tree."

Sokka thought it was surprisingly easy to call a truce with the swamp denizens, considering they had met by attacked each other. "Wouldn't it be nice if it was always this easy?" Katara mused; Sokka couldn't tell if she was being wistful or sarcastic.

That evening the group enjoyed the eccentric but well-intentioned hospitality of the swamp benders, who introduced themselves as Hue, Due, and Tho. Rather than just endure it, Aang seemed to genuinely enjoy himself.

"What are you so happy about?" Katara asked.

"I just have a good feeling about my vision," Aang replied. He still wanted to know who the mysterious girl was. He felt confident that he would find her, whether or not he tried to look for her.

Sokka just smiled sardonically. "Don't get your hopes too high, you two."


	25. The Blind Bandit

_Published May 11, 2012_

**Author's Note:** A few scattered thoughts. First of all, yesterday I finally set up my own account on DeviantArt! I'll be posting my photography, and making collections of my favorite pictures, including fanart.

I meant to include the following quote to refer to Zuko and Katara, but I put it here because Aang and Toph are also opposites.

I love watching _The Legend of Korra_, but I'm hoping that my imagination won't get so caught up in the new show that I won't still appreciate and be inspired by the one that started it all. That's why I'm glad I have this story to work on, it motivates me to look up old episodes and analyze the characters I love.

Song: "Never Had a Dream Come True" by S Club 7

* * *

><p>Waterloo is actually the strangest encounter in history. Napoleon and Wellington. They are not enemies, they are opposites. Never had God, who takes pleasure in antitheses, made a more striking contrast and a more extraordinary meaning. ~ Victor Hugo, <em>Les Misérables<em>

* * *

><p>Fighting for entertainment, in and of itself, was a strange concept for a peaceful Air Nomad. But in spite of this, Aang was interested in the Earth Rumble, since it would be a chance to witness people earthbending without being on the receiving end of an attack. At least, that's what they thought, until a boulder nearly demolished their front row seats.<p>

"This is just going to be a bunch of guys chucking rocks at each other, isn't it?" Katara said, sounding less enthusiastic than she had been when she suggested they attend this tournament. Still, she tried to pay attention for Aang's sake.

"How about the Boulder? He's got some good moves."

"I don't know." Aang sounded doubtful. "Bumi said my teacher would be someone who listens to the earth. He's just listening to his big muscles."

"Fire Nation Man has Admiral Zhao's sideburns," Katara observed.

"Hey, you're right," Aang realized, grinning at her.

"She can't really be blind. It's just part of her character, right?" Almost everyone in Earth Rumble VI was called something that couldn't be their real name; and some, like the Fire Nation Man, really got into their persona. It wouldn't have surprised her if the "Blind Bandit" wasn't truly blind, just as the "Blue Spirit" wasn't actually a spirit.

"I think she is," Aang said, looking surprised and slightly concerned.

"I think she is _going down!_" Sokka shouted. Aang flinched, seeing this reaction. In different circumstances, Aang would have leapt up to help the girl; but this was a place where people came for the sole purpose of fighting in combat. She could only be there because she wanted to fight.

The Boulder seemed to be thinking similarly. "The Boulder feels conflicted about fighting a young, blind girl."

The Blind Bandit smirked and pointed at him. "Sounds to me like you're _scared_, Boulder." She started her attack verbally rather than physically. Then, she threw her head back and laughed.

Aang froze, hearing that sound. He had heard it before. And the girl looked familiar, too: she was wearing different clothes, but she had the same short build and black hair in a bun. Suddenly it clicked in his mind. This was the girl who he had seen in the Swamp.

Aang watched carefully. The Blind Bandit waited for The Boulder to make the first move. She had even said, "Whenever you're ready." She was doing nothing, waiting for the right moment.

She was tough, and she had a smart mouth, but she wasn't as obvious and ferocious as the others. Aang could tell she was concentrating between strikes. Unlike the other earthbenders, she didn't move very much, but she knocked the Boulder out of the ring.

Sokka was dumbfounded, and crushed at seeing his celebrity beaten. Katara was surprised but coherent. "How did she do that?"

"She waited … and listened," Aang said, with an impressed and satisfied smile. He knew he had found who he was looking for. His earthbending teacher, and the girl in his swamp vision, were one and the same: the girl who called herself the Blind Bandit.

The host, Xin Fu, returned to the ring, holding a green bag. "To make things a little more interesting, I'm offering up this sack of gold pieces to anyone who can defeat the Blind Bandit!"

At first there was only silence. "What? No one dares to face her?"

"I will!" someone volunteered cheerfully.

She could usually tell, from the way people walked, whether they were young or old, male or female, confident or timid.

She could tell from his voice that this person was male, and young, in between childhood and the teen years. She wasn't one to judge by size or age, but he didn't even carry himself like an earthbender.

"Do people really want to see _two_ little girls fighting out here?" the Blind Bandit mused sarcastically.

"I don't really want to fight you. I want to talk to you."

He should have known that she came there to fight, not to talk. No sooner had he moved than she attacked, but he dodged it.

The smirk disappeared from the Bind Bandit's face. This opponent was elusive, impossible to pin down. She could tell when his feet touched the ground, but when he leapt up or somersaulted in the air she couldn't tell where he was. She was confused and surprised, but tried not to let it show. She waited and listened. He disappeared again, only to send more vibrations a second later.

His fighting style was also different from other earthbenders'. He wasn't eager to fight back; he kept evading, and when he actually knocked her out of the ring, it was by deflecting a rock that she had sent toward him, a defensive strategy. Somehow he won – without using earthbending.

Now the crowd was cheering. Not for the Blind Bandit. For this nameless boy.

Because of him, she lost the status of champion. It would take weeks, maybe months, of matches to regain that title.

She had been beaten at her own game.

* * *

><p>Of course, the Blind Bandit didn't show any of this in her behavior the next day. She had become very good at acting, not letting any of her triumphs or failures affect her at home. But inside, her mind was hard at work.<p>

She told herself that it was the fact that he had somehow cheated, and not her own wounded ego, that miffed her. Sure, she was proud, but she wasn't as conceited as some of the other competitors.

In a week or two everyone would forget about the new "champion," and she could make a comeback. She wanted to just forget about it for now. Which was yet another reason she was upset and hostile when he showed up in her home.

He wasn't alone; he had two accomplices, and one of them was a girl. So did this count as stalking?

Even at the Earth Rumble, no one had paid her attention as a person. She was just a figure to cheer on, and a symbol of how anyone – women, children, short people, the usual underdogs – could beat the odds.

Instead of letting them sneak up on her, the Blind Bandit sent them into the air with a shockwave, and they landed in the bushes near her. "What are you _doing_ here, Twinkle Toes?"

"How did you know it was me?"

"Don't answer to Twinkle Toes," Sokka whined. "It's not manly!"

"You're the one whose bag matches his belt," Katara retorted.

Toph ignored their banter. "How did you find me?"

The boy disappeared again, but then she felt his vibrations already on the ground. "Well, a crazy king told me I had to find an earthbender who listens to the earth. And then I had a vision in a magic swamp and –"

She didn't understand what he meant. She knew that vision was something that she did not have. She didn't know what a singular vision was.

Katara cut him off. "What Aang is trying to say is, he's the Avatar, and if he doesn't master earthbending soon he won't be able to defeat the Fire Lord."

The girl held out her hand, signaling her to stop. "Not my problem. Now get out of here or I'll call the guards."

Sokka tried next, with a reasonable approach. "Look, we all have to do our part to win this war. And yours is to teach Aang earthbending."

She had warned them, and though she may not always be truthful, she made good on her promises. The girl turned around, a distraught look on her face. "Guards! Guards, help!" she called out.

The three newcomers quickly ran away, just before two uniformed men came into that area of the garden. "Toph, what happened?" one of them asked.

Aang watched, hiding behind the outer wall. So the Blind Bandit did have another name: Toph. Toph Bei Fong.

"'Not my problem'?" Katara repeated incredulously. "How can she be that disdainful? Doesn't she know there's a war going on?"

"Maybe not," Sokka said suddenly. "Gaoling hasn't been touched by the war; and if her parents are as overprotective as her guards, then they may have sheltered her from the gory details."

"Or maybe," Aang said softly, "she doesn't want to be mixed up in our problems because she has some of her own."

* * *

><p>Toph wasn't sure what kind of game these kids were playing. When stalking didn't work, they tried a direct approach, through her parents. Apparently they had picked up on her charade, because they didn't say anything about the Earth Rumble; but Avatar Aang was stepping dangerously close to crossing the line.<p>

Incidentally, Toph thought the idea of a food fight intriguingly fun, but dinner at the Bei Fong estate was neither the time nor the place for one. When he blew soup all over the Bei Fongs and Master Yu, she finally had an excuse to let down her façade for a moment. "What's your problem?" she snapped, standing up.

"What's _your_ problem?" he retorted, finally showing some backbone.

_Last night, my problem was that you cheated and stole my hard-earned title. Now, my problem is that you're going to blow my cover._

Her parents behaved like they normally did: they plastered on smiles and acted like everything was fine, just the way it should be. They didn't ask what was going on; they were never suspicious, least of all of their daughter.

Toph had never had so much trouble balancing her two lives. She remembered that at first, it had been nerve-wracking: she was always on guard, afraid that her parents would notice one of her absences or that someone at Earth Rumble would recognize her as the Bei Fong heiress. It was fear, rather than guilt, that had troubled her. But time passed, nothing changed, and Toph became comfortable with her lies and secrets.

Of course, the Avatar didn't fully understand what a delicate situation her life was. But then again, she hadn't done much to help him see it.

Toph had never examined another person's feelings before, never tried to step into another person's shoes. (She never wore shoes, anyway. Even at home she could usually get away with it, since her dress covered her feet.) Empathy was not a quality that her parents had tried to instill in her; since they didn't plan on letting her leave the house, there was no need for her to learn how to understand or interact with others.

Toph sighed, blowing her bangs out of her face. She decided to talk to the Avatar.

She found the trio in the room her parents had provided. He was saying good-night to the huge animal that he apparently used for transportation.

Toph didn't announce herself; she just stood at the doorway and waited for them to notice her. When he turned around and saw her, Aang yelped and took on a defensive stance.

_Great,_ Toph thought pessimistically. Now he was afraid of her. And perhaps rightly so.

She folded her arms and leaned back against the door frame. "Relax. Look, I'm sorry about dinner. Let's call a truce, okay?"

Aang slid out of his stance. "Why don't you guys talk alone?" Katara suggested. It was between a student and a prospective teacher.

Toph jerked her head toward the door. "Want to go outside?"

Aang kept glancing at her. Her hair bun was lower now, and she allowed some of her bangs to hang in her face. Toph looked good in her pajamas. They were rather feminine, but she seemed freer now that she could move her arms and legs.

This was what he had wanted, a chance to talk to her. But they didn't talk about the war, or even about the possibility of Toph being Aang's teacher. They just talked.

"You've got some guts, stalking me like that," Toph said. She seemed pleased when she sensed how flustered that comment made him.

"Look, I'm sorry if I upset you by coming here," Aang began. "I'm not trying to invade your life."

"S'okay. To tell the truth, you're the most interesting thing that's happened to me lately."

"Even more than winning the Earth Rumbles?"

"Yup."

"So why were you so … put off?"

"First, I was annoyed that you humiliated me at the Earth Rumble. Second, you were coming close to blowing my cover – first you snuck in, and then you were all _suggestive_ at dinner. I have two reputations to uphold, you know."

Aang considered this. "I've seen you as the Blind Bandit, and as the Bei Fongs' daughter … so who are you, really?"

Toph frowned, thoughtful and maybe a little perplexed. Then she shrugged it off. "You can just call me Toph."

He followed her around the grounds; by now he was almost used to her good sense of direction. To his credit, he made no comment about her walking on the guardrail of the bridge, and made no attempt to stop her.

"Even though I was born blind, I've never had a problem seeing." She jumped down and landed on the ground, and she felt that second-long transition as she felt the vibrations she had created go out to her new surroundings. "I _see_ with earthbending. It's kind of like seeing with my feet." She had always thought of it that way, but this was the first time she had said it out loud – the first time she told anyone about it. They both had the feeling that she was sharing something precious with him. "I feel the vibrations in the earth, and I can _see_ where everything is. You, that tree, even those ants."

"That's amazing." Aang looked at her with awe and new respect.

"My parents don't understand." Toph sounded frustrated but somehow resigned. "They've always treated me like I was helpless."

"Is that why you became the Blind Bandit?"

That was putting it rather simply, but it was true. "Yes." Aang was the first person to find out about her double life. Then again, he was the first person who had cared about her enough to want to know the truth about her.

Aang was still talking. "Then why stay here where you're not happy?"

He didn't see it the way she did. The Air Nomads valued freedom, including freedom from such restraints as family ties. Aang had even run away from home once, seeking freedom from his responsibilities. Though family was very important to Katara and Sokka, they and their relatives had willingly parted ways time and again. But this was the only life Toph had ever known.

"They're my parents. Where else am I supposed to go?"

There was a very short pause. Then Aang smiled, though he knew she couldn't see it. "You could come with us," he offered quietly. There, he had said it. He knew it was a lot to ask for, especially from a kid.

"Yeah. You guys get to go wherever you want." Toph sounded envious and wistful. "No one telling you what to do. That's the life. It's just not _my_ life."

"… It could be, if you want."

Instead of looking awkward, embarrassed, or affronted, Toph looked surprised and worried. She knelt down and pressed her hand against the grass; Aang knew now that she must be feeling vibrations in the earth. "We're being ambushed," she exclaimed. She stood, grabbed his wrist, and led him running across the lawn.

They hadn't gotten far when one of the attackers emerged from the ground in front of them, blocking their escape. Then, before a fight could commence, two metal cases fell around Aang and Toph. Aang looked through metal bars and recognized the Earth Rumble contestants they had seen the previous night. Toph couldn't feel vibrations through the metal, but she recognized Xin Fu's voice, though she'd never heard it sound so menacing. "I think you kids owe me some money."

* * *

><p>Kidnapping. Toph knew this was just the sort of thing her parents had always feared. She knew she was worth a lot of money, and she had no doubt her parents would be willing to pay the ransom. But she dreaded having to come home and be fussed over by her mother, and having to endure more heavy security …<p>

Hopefully they wouldn't find out exactly how Xin Fu knew her.

"How did they find me?" Toph wondered. "No one else knew who I am, where I live."

"… Maybe they followed me when I was trying to track you down?" Suddenly Aang remembered the two boys Katara had interrogated. They were Master Yu's students, and Xin Fu's spectators; maybe he had gotten to them, and they had repeated what they told Aang.

"You still haven't told me why you're so sure that I'm the one who's supposed to teach you earthbending."

Aang scratched his head. "It's a long story," he said.

"Well, we have nothing else to do here."

Aang paused. "Do you believe in destiny?"

"I don't know …" Toph stopped. "Are you hitting on me?" she said abruptly.

Aang blinked. "What? No! I just – well, it's part of the story. Okay, first I wanted to learn earthbending from my friend, King Bumi – he's the king of Omashu, but it was just taken by the Fire Nation, so Bumi's a prisoner. He told me my teacher would be someone who waits and listens."

"So?"

"So, that's exactly the way you fight! I was watching you at the Earth Rumble, I saw you wait before making a move. And you told me about how you see – you listen to the earth, just like Bumi said you would. And then, talking of destiny again, we traveled through this mystical swamp, and I saw a vision of you."

"What does that even mean?"

Aang remembered that she was blind, and might not understand how someone could see something that wasn't there, that wasn't making vibrations that she could imagine. "It means I saw what you looked like – your hair was in a bun, and you were wearing your fancy dress. And you had a winged boar, like in your family's seal. I saw you because the universe was telling me I would meet you. And I know you're meant to be my teacher."

Toph paused, absorbing all this. "So, you think I need to teach you how to earthbend because I match the description of some crazy old man, and you saw me before you even met me?"

"… That's right."

Toph laughed a little. "You're really weird."

"Really? No one's ever called me that before," Aang said, borrowing a bit of Sokka's sarcasm. He was the Avatar; of course he was weird, especially compared to everyone in this generation.

"Sorry. I was going to say, you're weird, but I like you anyway."

That brought a smile to Aang's face. "Thanks. … I'm really sorry about causing this, Toph," Aang said sadly.

"Don't be," Toph said, not the least bit emotional. "Scratch _interesting_; you're the most _exciting_ thing in my life lately."

"You keep saying 'lately.' What else has happened in your life?"

"Well, there was the time I ran away, and met some badgermoles. They're the ones who taught me earthbending, not Master Yu. And then there was my first time sneaking out to watch an Earth Rumble, and later the first time I participated in one …"

"Still bragging, even when imprisoned!" Xin Fu shouted up to them, sneering.

Toph scowled. "You think you're so tough … why don't you come up here so I can smack that grin off your face?"

"I'm not smiling."

"Toph!" It was her father's voice.

"Here's your money. Now let them go." Sokka dropped the bag of gold pieces on the ground, and Master Yu sent it to Xin Fu with a shockwave. A moment later the bottom of Toph's cage opened, and she fell into the earth ring. She quickly got to her feet and ran over to her father. He didn't embrace her; he just took her hand and started to lead her away.

"What about Aang?" Katara demanded.

Xin Fu unrolled a wanted poster depicting Avatar Aang. "I think the Fire Nation will pay a hefty price for the Avatar. Now, _get out of my ring_."

His accomplices, all the earthbenders who had competed the previous night, came to his side one by one, staring the two siblings down.

Aang waved them off. "Go. I'll be okay." His words reminded Katara of herself, when Zuko had kidnapped her – that had been two or three months before. But Katara wasn't Aang; she might have been expendable, but the Avatar wasn't.

The siblings backed away, only to stop at the exit tunnel. Katara called out to the three people leaving. "Toph, there's too many of them. We need an earthbender. We need you!"

Toph's first thought was one that had been developing in her mind all evening: no one had ever needed her before.

Lao answered before she could. "My daughter is blind. She is blind and tiny and helpless and fragile. She cannot help you."

Toph yanked her hand away from him. "_Yes_," she said, turning around. "I _can._" Aang was her friend – her first real friend – and she wasn't going to just leave him behind. Not when she could prevent it. Even if rescuing him meant blowing her cover. He was worth it.

Lao was too surprised and frightened to stop her. Toph had never openly shown defiance, at least not since she was very young. He watched, distraught, as she walked back onto the arena with Sokka and Katara. Toph conjured a gargantuan rock that blocked the earthbenders who were trying to carry Aang off.

"Let him go. I beat you all before, and I'll do it again," she threatened.

"The Boulder takes issue with that comment." The Hippo threw Aang's metal case to the side; Katara made a mental note to heal any bruises he had from being jostled in metal.

Katara and Sokka moved to help, but Toph spread her arms to hold them back. "Wait." Unlike them, she seemed unafraid of the line of opponents charging her. She spoke over her shoulder. "They're mine."

Toph waited, and when the moment was right, she stomped on the ground, causing an explosion of rock. The dust cloud left the other earthbenders lost and disoriented, but it made no difference to Toph.

While she fought and distracted them, Sokka and Katara tried to free Aang from his metal cage. Sokka picked up a rock from the debris, and tried to break the lock with it. "Hit it harder!" Aang counseled.

"I'm trying!" Sokka exclaimed. It took several more minutes, but finally they managed to open the cage. Aang leapt out, ready to help Toph, but Sokka held up a hand to stop him, and then pointed mutely at the middle of the ring, where Toph was taking out her opponents one by one. She seemed to be doing quite well on her own.

Five minutes later, Toph stood triumphant, having knocked every one of their opponents out of the ring. The four kids met Lao and Yu at the entrance. Yu was marveling at Toph's apparent prowess, while Lao just looked thoughtful, a bit dazed.

"Toph," her father said suddenly, "did I hear right? Did you say you had beaten all of them before?"

"Yeah, you heard right." Toph knew the jig was up; she hoped it would be easier if she came clean.

"When … never mind. We'll discuss this when we get home." Lao and Yu herded the children out of the arena. Toph fell back and walked next to Aang.

"I guess this means I won't be welcome at Earth Rumble Six anymore," Toph mused. "I'll miss this place … but I can't say I'll miss these people."

"You saved the Avatar. By extension, you may have just saved the world," Sokka informed her.

Toph snorted disdainfully. "I wasn't thinking about that." She just hadn't wanted her first and only friend to be imprisoned for life; but there was no way she was going to admit that. She wasn't that … sappy.

"Well, you really came though for me," Aang said. "Thanks, Toph."

"You're welcome."

Katara smiled, hearing this exchange. _You are welcome_. It sounded as though Toph was finally accepting Aang.

* * *

><p>Poppy was waiting for them when they returned to the Bei Fong estate.<p>

"Toph!" Poppy smothered her in a hug. "Thank goodness you're all right!"

Toph awkwardly patted her back. "Of course I am," she said.

"Poppy," Lao said, gently but firmly, "there are some things we need to discuss. All three of us."

Toph couldn't remember the last time she was included in a discussion, even one about herself. When they talked to Master Yu about her training, she didn't have any input. But now, Lao let her explain her half of the story. In the end, she told them everything – how she had been sneaking out for months to participate in earthbending tournaments.

She took it as a good sign that they didn't yell, or cry, or reprimand her. Maybe they were in shock from the night's events. Or maybe they simply didn't know what to make of her.

Lao ended the story by describing what had just transpired in the earthbending ring. He spoke of Toph's actions and abilities with neither pride nor shame, merely testifying what he had witnessed.

Toph held up one hand in a reconciliatory gesture reminiscent of Aang. "Let me speak." Everyone else fell silent. "Dad, I know it's hard for you to see me this way, but the obedient little helpless blind girl that you think I am just isn't me. I love fighting." She smiled. "I love being an earthbender. And I'm really, really good at it," she said earnestly. "I know I've kept my life secret from you, but you were keeping me secret from the whole world. You were doing it to protect me. But I'm twelve years old, and I've never had a real friend."

Aang, Sokka, and Katara exchanged glances.

"So now that you see who I really am, I hope it doesn't change the way you feel about me." Standing before them, she didn't feel like the Blind Bandit, or the dutiful daughter she pretended to be. She was just Toph. _This is who I am; you can't change it, you can either accept it or reject it_. Strangely, she found herself hoping for her parents' approval, or at least acceptance.

"Of course it doesn't change the way I feel about you, Toph," Lao said gently. "It's made me realize something."

"It has?" Toph sounded surprised, and almost painfully hopeful.

"Yes. I've let you have far too much freedom." He sounded angry with himself. "From now on you'll be cared for and guarded twenty-four hours a day."

"But Dad!" It was bad enough she couldn't be in the Earth Rumbles anymore; now she was losing any prospective freedom she'd had.

She had thought that maybe this would help her parents to understand her. But instead she had alienated herself from them, and now they were determined to alienate her from the world.

She hadn't even gotten to the part about teaching Aang earthbending. She didn't care if she wasn't allowed to participate in Earth Rumbles or even go out; if she could teach Aang, be friends with him, and continue earthbending, then she would be happy.

"We are doing this for your own good, Toph," Poppy said. She supported whatever her husband decided.

"Please escort the Avatar and his friends out," Lao instructed the servant, who ushered them to the door. "They are no longer welcome here."

_No longer welcome_. So even if he survived the war, Aang couldn't ever visit her. He would never see her again.

"I'm sorry, Toph," Aang said, looking over his shoulder at the girl.

"I'm sorry, too. Good-bye, Aang." It was the first time she had used his real name.

Glancing over their shoulders, they saw that she had tears running down her face, almost hidden behind her bangs.

Katara felt a ripple of sympathy, as she was reminded of the first time she had cried over a boy. In this case, the feelings weren't as deep, but the separation was to be much more permanent.

"I guess it's true what they say," Sokka said, grasping for something to fill the silence. "Easy come, easy go."

"But wasn't _easy_, finding her," Katara reminded him. "And that makes it harder to say good-bye."

"I'm not only sad to say good-bye," Aang said. "I'm sad because I just ruined her life. She saved me, and now she's paying for it. I tried to help her, but all I did was make things worse for her." Aang bowed his head mournfully.

"Hey, you helped her to tell the truth," Sokka reminded him. "That counts for something. It's got to be a weight off her conscience."

_And a new weight on mine,_ Aang thought dejectedly.

"Don't worry," Katara assured him. "We'll find you a teacher. There are plenty of amazing earthbenders out there."

"Not like her." Toph recognized that earthbending wasn't just a martial art; it was the lens through which she saw the world. For twenty-four hours – ever since he saw her defeat The Boulder in the tournament – he had had his hopes pinned on having her for a teacher.

They needed each other; he needed Toph to teach him, and she needed Aang to set her free.

The three of them mounted Appa's saddle. They all knew they had overstayed their visit to Gaoling. And still, Aang didn't prompt Appa. Something was telling him to wait, and listen.

He heard someone panting, and the sound of someone running.

He waited, and Toph came running into the clearing.

"Toph! What are you doing here?"

"My dad changed his mind," Toph said breathlessly. "He said I was free to travel the world."

There was only a brief moment of silence. They didn't accuse her of lying, or demand to know the truth. Maybe by now they had learned to respect her privacy. It was Sokka who said, "Well, we better get out of here – before your dad changes his mind again."

"Good idea," Toph agreed. She was aware that she was leaving the security of earth, of home, and asking to be taken into the unknown.

"Welcome aboard," Katara said, giving her a congratulatory handshake. Toph's hand was dusty with dirt – she had probably used earthbending to leave her home – but Katara didn't comment on it.

"Hold on," Sokka instructed cheerfully, before snapping the reins. "Yip-yip!"

"Who-o-oa!" Toph hung on to the side of the saddle, feeling a rush of air as they ascended. Aang put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. Then Toph laughed, partly out of fear, and partly from exhilaration. She wanted to throw up her arms and yell into the wind, but being loud would defeat the purpose of sneaking out. Aang grinned, hearing her laugh yet again. Katara smiled, sensing the start of a strange but endearing relationship.


	26. The Chase

_Published June 9, 2012_

**Author's Note:** Just my thoughts about the new Image Manager. I love it! I don't know if I'll keep the current picture for this story, or use a picture of a Pai Sho board or something. I'll probably change the "cover art" if I can find a better picture … or if someone visually artistic offers to make an illustration … Anyway, just a word to the wise, be careful of what pictures you use. You know the button you have to click that says you own or have permission to use the image? I doubt people are going to be honest about that. Give credit where it's due; don't use any DeviantArt pieces without getting permission from the artist.

**Song:** "Lonesome Road" by James Taylor

* * *

><p>The surface of the earth is soft and impressionable by the feet of men; and so with the paths which the mind travels. How worn and dusty, then, must be the highways of the world, how deep the ruts of tradition and conformity! ~ Henry David Thoreau, <em>Walden<em>

* * *

><p>Everyone in the newly expanded group felt optimistic. They had accomplished one major goal, finding an earthbending teacher, in half the time it took them to find a waterbending master.<p>

As Aang said, it was spring, a time for new beginnings. Aang had a new friend, and was going to start learning a new element.

They they decided to wait a couple days before Aang officially started his earthbending training. They had to put some distance between themselves and Gaoling; and Toph said that she would need to figure out how to start his training. She had never taught anyone before, and Master Yu hadn't provided a good example for her to follow; Aang realized she would have to go by what the badgermoles had taught her.

While Aang was thinking about how Toph would be as a teacher, Katara was more concerned with her assimilation into the group. It was a good sign, she thought, that they could fool around and laugh together. That was a definite sign of familiarity and friendship.

But while Katara and the boys went about setting up camp, Toph lazed around, chewing on a piece of straw. Katara tried to talk to her, but Toph didn't get the hint.

Aang remembered his first real conversation with her._ "You guys get to go wherever you want. No one telling you what to do. That's the life."_

Maybe she had misunderstood; or maybe Aang hadn't explained it thoroughly. They were only able to get along without adults because they were responsible; they worked together and helped each other out.

Of course, Katara and Sokka had been raised that way. But Toph had never had to work. She was independent enough to want to take care of herself, but she didn't see why she had to help the others.

Katara was becoming more and more frustrated. They had invited her to be a team member, not a detached observer.

On the other hand, Toph proved to be a good lookout, even when she was sleeping. She was awakened by strange vibrations, the magnitude of which she could only compare to an avalanche. They decided to leave, to be on the safe side; and from the sky they could see what Toph had felt.

"What is that thing?" Katara wondered aloud.

"Gee, I don't know," Toph said sarcastically. "I was about to ask you that."

"It's some kind of metal vehicle," Aang said, looking down apprehensively at the machine.

Toph didn't like metal. Not only was it a substance she couldn't bend, but it was a nonliving thing that could move. It seemed unnatural. The only nonliving things that could move were the four elements; yet metal, powered properly, could move on its own.

Toph yawned. "So, is this typical for you guys? Being followed?"

"Yeah, but usually we can outpace whoever's trying to fight or capture us," Sokka said.

"Mm, 'kay, _fight_ I'm fine with, but _capture_, not so much," Toph said frankly. "Does that happen often?"

"Sometimes," Katara admitted. "But we always get away in the end."

* * *

><p>The chase lasted much longer than any of them anticipated. Slowly Toph realized something: they didn't know what they were doing.<p>

She hadn't signed up for this. She hadn't known that traveling with the Avatar would mean having to run, possibly for their lives. And, on a lesser note, she hadn't expected a girl just two years older than her to act as though she was a parent and Toph was a child.

It wasn't in Toph's nature to complain; she had learned to keep quiet around her parents. But when Katara kept bringing up how Toph had annoyed her, she was just as defensive as usual.

"Come on guys, there's something after us and we don't even know what or who is is." Aang's voice became muffled as he covered his head with the top of his shirt.

"It could be Zuko," Katara said, keeping her tone neutral. "We haven't seen him since the North Pole."

"Who's Zuko?" Toph asked.

The question was met with a brief, slightly uncomfortable silence.

"Just some angry freak with a ponytail who's tracked us all over the world," Sokka answered.

"He's the Fire Lord's son," Katara explained. "He was banished and sent to capture Aang."

"And he's Katara's ex-boyfriend," Aang added as an afterthought.

That piqued Toph's interest. "Really? Katara liked an angry freak?"

Katara glared at him. "I'm over him, Aang. As long as he's after you, he's my enemy," she said firmly.

Aang frowned. "But is he still after me? Like you said, we haven't seen him since the North Pole."

Sokka turned on his side. "Huh. Maybe he finally came to his senses and quit chasing us." It sounded like a question.

"It's not like Zuko to give up on something," Katara acknowledged sadly.

There was only a moment of silence before Toph spoke up, sounding reluctant. "Um, guys? You're going to hate me for saying this …"

"Oh, no, don't tell me!" Sokka said, folding his arms in a frame around his head.

"That's impossible," Aang said. "There's no way they could have tracked us here."

"I can feel it with my own two feet!"

The four of them stood on the ledge of the plateau, looking down at the tank below. It was Aang who decided they stay to see who their pursuers were.

Three figures riding on komodo-lizards emerged from the tank. It was dark, but the ones with vision could make out the red and pink shades of Fire Nation clothes.

"It's those three girls from Omashu," Katara exclaimed. This meant nothing to Toph, but it meant a great deal to the other two.

The encounter couldn't really be called a fight. Toph was the only one in the group who made any move to stop their opponents. But, though she didn't show it, she was bewildered and unprepared for their types of attacks. It was Aang who explained that one girl had thrown small arrows, while another used firebending to conjure lightning, a substance that Toph had never fully understood.

"I can't believe those girls followed us all the way from Omashu," Katara said.

Toph acted unimpressed. "I still think we could've taken them."

"Are you kidding?" Katara said incredulously. "The crazy blue firebending and the flying daggers are bad enough, but last time we saw them – one of those girls did something that took my bending away."

"She blocked your chi," Aang said helpfully.

Katara nodded. "That was scary."

Toph was silent, considering for the first time what it would be like to not bend. She was getting used to being separated from her element, but not being able to command it when it was right under or in front of her – she'd be just as helpless as her parents had made her out to be.

"I've never seen anyone make lightning before," Sokka said, thoughtful despite his exhaustion.

"I have," Katara said slowly. "General Iroh did it once, during the storm, when I was on Zuko's ship." She remembered talking to him about it the following day.

_ "I know of only a few firebenders capable of creating lightning – my brother, Fire Lord Ozai; and Zuko's sister, Princess Azula."_

Katara's eyes widened. Could it be …?

It would make sense. The girl was obviously Fire Nation. A powerful bender, a _firebender_, like Zuko. And she was young, probably younger than Zuko.

_"You're like my sister. Everything always came easy for her. She's a firebending prodigy; everyone adores her."_

The more Katara thought about it, the more sense it made. But that did little to comfort her.

_ "I remember Zuko's younger sister, Princess Azula, seemed to relish seeing Zuko humiliated and hurt. Sadistic little firebender."_

"Katara, are you okay?" Sokka asked.

She blinked. "Yeah, why?"

"You look scared. If you're worried about the chi-blocking or whatever you call it …"

"That's not it. I just thought of something."

"What is it?" Aang looked over his shoulder at her.

"I don't want to alarm anyone," Katara said hesitantly. "But I think the firebender … may be Zuko's sister."

Sokka's mouth dropped open, either from shock or horror. Aang's eyes widened. Toph just absorbed this tidbit, not knowing what it meant to the others.

"I didn't even know he had a sister," Aang said finally. "What makes you think she's her?"

"It just makes sense," Katara said. "When we were fighting them, I thought she looked kind of familiar. Then I realized, it was Zuko she reminded me of. She had some connection with the Fire Nation governor of Omashu. And I think Iroh said that Azula is one of the few firebenders who can generate lightning."

"So now she's taking after her big brother?" Sokka harrumphed. "Hunting the Avatar and all that?"

"I wonder how Zuko would take that," Aang mused.

"Maybe she knocked him out of the race," Sokka suggested.

"Zuko never gives up," Katara reminded him grimly. Sokka had no answer to that.

They didn't speak of the Fire Nation again, but Katara still thought about them. She remembered something Zuko had said the last time she saw him (not counting the vision in the swamp). _"I will never accept failure! Failure is not an option."_

Katara pondered that statement. It was a good attitude to have while trying to achieve a goal … but afterward … you learned from failure, sometimes more than from success.

But then again, failure was not an option for Aang, who had to master the elements and defeat the Fire Lord.

* * *

><p>Even before his banishment, Zuko had known loneliness, but never solitude. He wasn't sure if he liked it or not. He was more thoughtful, if only because he had more time to think.<p>

It had been a new experience for him, traveling and not having people know who he was. He knew he no longer looked the same as he had before becoming a fugitive.

Zuko saw how kind and cruel people, even the same people, could be. And he saw what a difference his heritage made to them. Even generally kind people were hostile toward him when they found out he was Fire Nation.

Seeing the loving Earth Kingdom family had made Zuko think of his own family, at least the family that he missed – like his mother and Lu Ten. In the past he had avoided thinking about them by keeping busy, but now, he had more time than he wanted to reminisce.

When Lee and his parents mentioned his brother, it made Zuko think of Azula and Lu Ten. A lot had changed because of Lu Ten's death. Really, it had changed the course of his life.

He had bonded with Lee when he found the boy trying to use his broadswords. Rather than get angry with him, Zuko had acted the way Iroh might have, and advised Lee on how to better wield the swords. He wondered if this was how Iroh felt while teaching him firebending, or when he lectured Zuko and Katara about the elements and opposites … but he wouldn't go down that trail of thought.

Maybe he could be a master, and teach either swordfighting or firebending. He had never considered that for a future. But then again, there were many things he had never considered. Zuko had always had a narrow idea of his future. Ever since Lu Ten died and his father took the throne, he'd believed that he would one day become Fire Lord. That's what he wanted to do, because he had even come to believe that it was what he was meant to do.

That was still what he wanted to do. Wasn't it?

When had he begun to doubt it?

Probably when he had befriended the Water Tribe girl. The experience had shown him that things don't always go according to plan, and that actions had consequences (a lesson he had thought he already learned).

_"I'm already banished. Things can't get worse for me."_ That's what he had told Zhao, who assured him that things most certainly could worsen.

_What did you expect?_ Zuko berated himself. _You knew what would happen, between rescuing the Avatar and protecting a waterbender_.

Would he be in this situation now, if he hadn't done that?

It didn't matter, Zuko told himself. He would never regret helping Katara. He hadn't just been acting on emotions, either; protecting her had been the right thing to do.

Did he miss her? He tried not to. But he did think of her, from time to time. She had asked him to remember her, and he wanted to grant that request, as it was the only thing she had asked of him that he could actually carry out.

He knew that there was one person in the world who would mourn him if he died. He had to stay alive, for her sake. She gave him a reason to live. Staying alive was one way – maybe the only way – that he could avoid hurting her, causing her pain.

The day after he left Lee's Earth Kingdom village, Zuko finally found something. A trail in the dirt, an imprint made by some kind of machine. It had to be Fire Nation; they were the most technologically advanced of the four nations.

It was something. It was a lead. He felt certain it would lead him to at least one of his enemies.

* * *

><p>"I can't believe I yelled at my earthbending teacher." It hadn't been the first time he and Toph yelled at each other, but it was the first time since she agreed to teach him. "Now she's gone."<p>

"I know," Katara said gloomily. "We're all just trying to get used to each other, and I was so mean to her." She didn't know why or how that happened. She hadn't been that mean since – probably since she yelled at Aang, when they almost fought over the waterbending scroll. She had clashed with Zuko afterwards, but she hadn't been nasty with him.

Sokka was sitting a short distance away. He turned to look over his shoulder at them. "Remember the last time we split up? When Bato was going to take us to see Dad?"

Katara's response was grim. "Yeah, I remember. We didn't make up until we were attacked."

Aang's head snapped up when he heard this. He didn't want that to happen with them and Toph.

"You know what made me change my mind?" Sokka said. "I didn't want Aang to be on his own. Because I know what it's like to be left behind."

Katara was silent, thinking about what he must mean. Hakoda had left both of them behind to fight in the war. And there had been a time when Sokka and Aang had to leave Katara behind, when she was taken prisoner.

They hadn't been with Toph long enough to miss her. But she could still be feeling like a lone wolf, striking out on her own.

"Isn't this kind of the opposite?" Katara said. "She left her parents, instead of the other way around. And now she's walked out on us. She's not being left behind; _she's_ the one leaving."

"That doesn't mean she should be alone," Aang said firmly. She would be even more lonely than she had been at the Bei Fong estate. Toph may have been able to protect herself, but she didn't know how to operate like a normal person, since she had been sheltered all her life. She had never bought food in a market, or had to earn money.

"We have to find Toph and apologize," Katara sighed.

"Okay, but what are we going to do about the tank full of dangerous ladies chasing us?"

Aang pulled a loose tuft of fur off of Appa. When he opened his palm, the hairs blew away in the breeze. That gave him an idea.

* * *

><p>The truth was, Toph didn't know what to do now. She supposed she <em>could<em> go home, but that would be like giving up. And then it was likely to be even worse there than it used to be, after she had run away.

She had two other options: wander aimlessly and avoid Team Avatar (as Sokka wanted to call them), or go looking for them and ask them to accept her back. Toph didn't want to come crawling back to them. If anyone should, it was them. And she didn't know if she'd give in so easily if they asked her to come back. Toph still didn't see what their problem was. She had done _them_ a favor by coming. She never asked them for anything.

Toph was distracted from her thoughts when she sensed vibrations from a human being nearby. It wasn't anyone she knew. His steps were heavy; he must be pretty big. He was passing behind a large rock nearby. Thinking that he may have had something to do with the girls in the machine, Toph stomped her foot, sending a small shockwave toward whoever was trying to hide.

She heard the man cry out, and climbed onto the top of the rock to face him. He was on his knees, supporting himself with one hand and rubbing his back with the other.

"That really hurt my tailbone," Iroh murmured. Toph could tell from his gravelly voice that he was pretty old. He didn't seem at all upset about being attacked.

Toph slid out her stance. "Sorry; I thought you were hiding, or following me."

"Really? Now you've made me curious. What are you doing out here?" As far as Iroh knew, they were in the middle of nowhere.

She leapt down so she was on the same level as him. "I could ask you the same thing."

"Ah. Forgive me for being rude."

"I won't ask you if you don't ask me."

Iroh took this to mean she wasn't interested in introductions. He glanced at his small pile of supplies. "Would you like some tea?"

Toph considered, and then squatted down, as though resting but ready to get up and go at any moment.

Iroh enjoyed going through the motions of making tea. It had been a long time since he shared the drink with anyone. Then again, it had been a while since he saw anyone.

"Here is your tea." Iroh held the cup out for her, but Toph didn't take it right away. He looked at her for a moment, noticing her gray, unseeing eyes. "You seem a little too young to be traveling alone," he said with a concerned look.

Toph took the cup of tea. "You seem a little too old," she replied.

Iroh chuckled. "Perhaps I am."

"I know what you're thinking," Toph said. "I look like I can't handle being by myself."

Iroh frowned. "I wasn't thinking that," he said, only partly lying.

"You wouldn't even let me pour my own cup of tea," Toph said, before taking her first sip.

"I poured your tea because I wanted to, and for no other reason."

Toph sighed. "People see me and think I'm weak. They want to take care of me. But I can take care of myself, by myself."

"You sound like my nephew," Iroh said, in his slow, sage tone. "Always thinking you need to do things on your own, without anyone's support. There is nothing wrong with letting people who love you help you.

"Not that I love you," Iroh added with a chuckle. "I just met you; this is only our first cup of tea. Remember this: When you share the first cup of tea, you are a stranger. On the second cup, you are a friend. On the third cup, you are family."

Toph thought his words over and smiled. "I like that proverb." She took another sip, then wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "So where is your nephew?"

Iroh was quiet for a moment before he answered. "I've been tracking him, actually."

"Is he lost?"

"Yes, a little bit," Iroh said sadly. "His life has recently changed, and he's going through very difficult times. He is trying to figure out who he is … and he went away."

He noticed a very subtle movement from the girl, not more than a start, or perhaps her eyes widened with understanding. "So, now you're following him."

"I know he doesn't want me around right now; but, if he needs me, I'll be there."

"Your nephew is very lucky, even if he doesn't know it." She stood up, smiling at the old man. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," Iroh said amiably. "Sharing tea with a fascinating stranger is one of life's true delights."

"No, thank you for what you said," Toph said sincerely. "It helped me."

"I'm glad." Iroh smiled. He had gone looking for Zuko, and instead he'd found a new friend. He always said, the only thing better than finding what you're looking for is finding something you're not looking for.

Toph picked up her back and turned to leave, but then turned back briefly, a serious and empathetic expression on her face. "Oh, and about your nephew … maybe you should tell him that you need him too."

Iroh considered this as he took a sip of tea, watching the earthbender leave.

As she walked, Toph kept remembering different things Iroh had said. She, too, had tried to figure out who she was. She had believed that she was done with her identity crisis. But her identity only mattered if she was with other people – people who cared about her.

* * *

><p>After a run-in with two of the Fire Nation girls, Sokka and Katara left Appa on the ground to catch up on sleep, and followed Aang's purposely laid fur trail on foot. It led them to an eerie deserted town, which showed signs of both long-term deterioration and very recent destruction.<p>

Sokka and Katara saw that there was someone lying unconscious in the dirt road. When they ran up, they saw the scar on the other side of his face. Sokka stopped short. "Is that …"

"Zuko." Katara tried to keep the tone of surprise out of her voice. She wasn't sure what she was feeling, having found him again. He didn't look the way Katara had seen him in her vision; and yet he was no longer the way he had been when they each left the North Pole. His ponytail was gone, replaced by a short crop of black hair.

"Aang couldn't have done this," Sokka said, referring to the fact that Zuko had been knocked out. Just then, they heard the sounds of combat from the next building. Katara rushed to the doorway, and saw that the room was filled with rubble and lined with fire. The girls' leader – Azula – was inside, her back to the exit, ready to strike a trapped Aang.

Katara and Sokka wasted no time rescuing Aang and putting Azula on the defensive. Katara's water whip pulled her out of the building, back into the open. The three of them started to push her back; they could tell that they were winning.

Azula was falling back, but suddenly she fell – or rather, was pushed – down from behind. Toph emerged from an alleyway, still in an earthbending stance. "I thought you guys could use a little help," she said, sounding just like the tough Blind Bandit they had met in Gaoling.

Katara paused long enough to smile. "Thanks."

The sudden appearance of so many people disoriented the Fire Nation princess. Seeing that she was outnumbered, she tried to run, only to literally run into another newcomer: Iroh, accompanied by a now conscious Zuko. The six fugitives had Azula cornered in the remaining two walls of a building.

Zuko wasn't surprised to see Katara and Sokka; he had known they must be nearby, when he found the Avatar. He didn't recognize the small girl in Earth Kingdom garb, but she seemed to be fighting alongside the trio.

Azula's eyes, so much like Zuko's, darted around the group. "Well, look at this," Azula said sarcastically. "Enemies and traitors all working together."

Zuko and Katara exchanged glances. Their faces were hard, but their eyes were wary and uncertain.

"Ever tried fighting all four elements at once?" Sokka challenged Azula.

"No, and I don't plan to," she said evenly. "You win. I know when I'm beaten. A princess surrenders with honor." She held up her arms in a gesture of defeat.

No one bought it. _Azula always lies_.

Iroh's eyes shifted to look at the blind earthbender, who was standing next to Katara and her friends. He realized, with just a slight start, that she must be working with them.

Azula saw his distractedness, and decided to take out the most skilled bender present. Iroh wasn't quick enough to redirect the lightning; the bolt hit him in the chest, and sent him spinning before toppling over.

Katara screamed; Zuko let out a strangled cry. Then the four teenage benders turned and blasted their respective elements at the Fire Princess.

There was an inexplicable explosion; the kids were blasted backwards, and the air was full of smoke. Katara crawled on her hands and knees, until the smoke thinned and they could see each other.

Azula was gone; she had disappeared, and her lizard was nowhere to be seen. Katara did a quick head count; everyone else was still there.

They turned around the saw Zuko kneeling next to an unconscious Iroh. Zuko, who usually hated appearing weak, now looked completely broken. He buried his face in his hands. Then he looked over his shoulder and saw the members of Team Avatar approaching him. "Get away from us!" he yelled. None of them, not even Katara, had seen him so angry or desperate.

Toph's gray, unseeing eyes filled with tears. She was concerned for Iroh, but she also felt bad "seeing" Zuko so upset. She had been away from home for forty-eight hours, and already she had experienced more emotions in that amount of time than ever before – annoyance, anger, pride, mutuality, remorse, gratitude, and now sympathy and sorrow.

Katara stepped forward, one hand over her heart, the other gesturing to Iroh. "Zuko, I can help."

"LEAVE!" Zuko turned and shot a wave of fire over the others' heads. Aang and Katara exchanged glances. Katara blinked back tears as she followed the others out of the flaming ghost town. Toph put a comforting hand on her shoulder. Katara glanced at her and would have smiled with gratitude if she weren't so exhausted and drained.

The reunited group walked back to where they had left Appa's saddle and their supplies, which thankfully had not been touched. No one questioned Toph's restored presence in the group. As dusk fell, they flew in search of a safe place to land so they could all catch up on their sleep.

Katara curled up in a corner of the saddle and cried silently, hugging her knees to her chest. "Hey." Sokka reached out to touch her; Katara responded by hugging him and crying on his shoulder. Sokka grunted in surprise, but awkwardly tried to comfort her.

Aang steered Appa to a mountainside a fair distance away. Tonight, and probably tomorrow as well, they would be able to catch up on their sleep. Rather than set up camp, they all stayed in the saddle. Toph lay down between Aang, her closest friend, and Katara, her newest friend.

"Hey." Aang touched Toph's arm lightly. "I'm glad you came back."

Toph tried to act nonchalant, but it was hard because she was so tired. "Well … I figured you guys need me," she murmured. She paused, curling into the fetal position with her hands under her head, and closed her eyes. "And I think … maybe I need you, too."

Aang's eyes opened in surprise; he looked at Toph, who either didn't notice that he was startled or was choosing to ignore it. Aang smiled involuntarily and shook his head before lying down again. The four children, lemur, and sky bison were all asleep within minutes.


	27. Mutuality

_Published July 1, 2012_

"Mutuality"

* * *

><p>"Well, she went back for the sake of her nation, and he stayed there for the sake of his. Wasn't that right?"<p>

The girl considered this and said: "I suppose they both thought more about their people than they thought about each other."

"And you, young man?"

The boy looked down at his feet. "I think they both thought more about their people than they thought about themselves."

"Good answers. And I think they were happy, in their own ways."

"But they were still sweet on each other," said the girl, not giving up.

~ Terry Pratchett, _Nation_

* * *

><p>Aang and his friends never had mornings like this. They always had to get up in the morning, because they always had a goal in mind, something they had to do.<p>

But this morning, everyone stayed sleeping, or else resting, in the saddle. When each woke up, they tried to rest more, acting as though they were still asleep. It was hard to differentiate who was totally asleep and who was half-asleep.

Apparently, Toph was neither. "Katara?"

"Yeah. You're awake, too?"

"Yeah. Katara, the boy we fought with earlier – is he the guy you told me about?"

She heard Katara sigh. "Yes, that was Zuko."

"I think he's the old man's nephew."

Katara was startled. "How did you know that?"

"I met him earlier today, after I walked out on you guys. He mentioned that he had a nephew, and I figured that boy must be him."

Katara was silent for a moment. Then she spoke again. "His name is Iroh. I think he's a retired general. He's kind of absentminded – at least he acts that way – but he's also really kind, and very wise."

"I know." Toph sounded worried. "Do you think he'll be okay?"

Silence. "I don't know," Katara said finally. "Toph?"

"What?"

"Will you help me do something? I … I don't want to go alone."

Toph's small smile was unusually gentle. "Sure."

They tried to move silently, so as not to disturb the boys. Katara gathered some provisions in Sokka's old Water Tribe bag, which he had stopped using after he bought the new Earth Kingdom bag. She brought her water skin, refilled with water from the river they had crossed earlier.

"Let's go." The girls slid down Appa's side. Katara couldn't help remembering another time when she had snuck away from camp. What an adventure she'd had because of that …

She was so distracted by the memory that she forgot to be cautious. She almost tripped on a rock. Toph stopped short, and Katara guessed that she was sensing vibrations. Then the earthbender cursed softly. "Caught."

"Where are you going?"

They turned around slowly to face a disgruntled and suspicious Sokka, who was looking down at them from Appa's saddle.

Toph's expression was stoic, but Katara's was much easier to read: she looked nervous, embarrassed, and guilty. She fumbled for an explanation. "We, ah – wanted to go for a walk," she half-lied.

Sokka swung himself over the edge of the saddle to join the girls on the ground. "After all the running we did yesterday?" He narrowed his eyes at the girls. "What's in the bag?"

Katara reluctantly shrugged it off of her shoulder, opened the flap and held it out for him to see. Inside was a small amount of food, rations for one person for a day.

Sokka's eyes widened. "Is that our food?"

"It's from Toph's and my shares," Katara said defensively.

Sokka looked up incredulously at her. "And you're giving this to _Zuko and Iroh_?"

"Yes," Katara said shortly. "And I'm going to heal Iroh, too, if Zuko will let me."

"It's like a peace offering," Toph suggested.

Sokka was not convinced. "Okay, I would be against this at the best of times; but now? Did you see what Zuko was like yesterday, when you said you could help?"

"Well, that's why I didn't push to help him yesterday," Katara said patiently. "He's probably cooled down by now."

All the talking, and the steadily rising voices, woke up Aang, who sat up groggily and watched the argument from Appa's saddle. He guessed pretty quickly who and what they were talking about.

"You offered him help," Sokka insisted. "He turned it down. You can't force yourself on him."

Toph snorted. Sokka blanched. "That didn't come out right," he muttered.

"Sokka," Katara said patiently, "remember when he helped us, even after we had fought against each other?"

Of course he remembered. He had been the one to ask for Zuko's help. But Sokka was adamant. "That was different. We were already in danger, we didn't have much to lose. Asking for help is different from offering it."

Katara sighed in exasperation. "Sokka –"

"I'm not going to let you put yourself in danger, just 'cause you can't let go of your creepy crush on Zuko!"

"Well, it's hard to put it to rest when he keeps turning up in our lives!" Katara shot back. Toph and Aang noticed that she didn't deny having a crush.

Sokka pointed at her. "So I'm right! You just want to spend time with Zuko," he accused. "After all he's done to us, ever since the time he kept you prisoner –"

"Shut up!" Katara snapped. "This isn't about me and Zuko. This is about helping someone who once helped me. I owe it to both of them."

"If you ever _owed_ him anything, we paid it back when we saved him in the blizzard at the North Pole."

Aang chose this moment to come down from the saddle, though he hung back with Toph while the two siblings quarreled.

Katara looked at Sokka, arms akimbo. "All right, forget about Zuko for a minute. His uncle is the one I want to help. He hasn't done as much harm as Zuko."

"Um, hello? In case you've forgotten, he's the Dragon of the West – you know he laid siege to Ba Sing Se for over two years? Not to mention he served under Zhao at the North Pole –"

"And then betrayed Zhao to help _us_ defend the Moon Spirit!"

Sokka was shouting now. "And a lot of help he gave us, too, telling Yue she should kill herself!"

There was a moment of silence. Katara and Aang stared at Sokka in shock. Toph's expression merely showed surprise and confusion.

Katara was starting to understand. "You blame _Iroh_ for Yue's death?"

"I –" Sokka exhaled and spread his palms helplessly. This wasn't what he had wanted to discuss. Not now, maybe not ever. He knew she wouldn't understand it, that it might even be a little irrational; but the fact remained that Iroh had encouraged Yue to sacrifice herself. He still blamed himself, sometimes, even though Katara had told him not to.

"Sokka." Katara's voice was gentle, reasoning. "Iroh knows a lot about nature and spirituality – especially for someone from the Fire Nation. He turned against Zhao because he realized how heinous it was to remove the moon. And he didn't tell Yue what to do; he just said what she _could_ do. You can't blame Iroh for what happened to her."

Sokka ran a hand over the shaved part of his head. "Should I blame myself, then? You know what she said to me, when I saw her in the swamp? Four words: 'You didn't protect me.'"

There was a moment of silence. It was Aang who answered, quiet and thoughtful. "I think that was a manifestation of your own feelings of guilt. That _doesn't_ mean you should feel responsible or blame yourself."

"If you want to blame someone, Sokka," Katara said quietly, "blame me."

Sokka blinked, taken aback. "What?"

She looked away, as though seeing a memory in her downcast eyes. "When we were looking for Aang in that blizzard, Yue and I had a conversation – about bravery, and how you can be brave in different ways. I told her I knew she could be brave, if she had to be. And then …" Katara's lower lip trembled. She didn't finish. She didn't have to.

Sokka stared at her. For the first time, it was starting to occur to him that maybe Yue's actions had been premeditated, not just impulse after Iroh suggested it.

Aang spoke up quietly, gripping his staff with both hands. "Maybe she knew all along. I think she realized it before we did – even before Iroh – that she'd have to give back her life."

"Remember," Katara added, "the spirits gave Arnook a vision of Yue becoming the Moon Spirit. Don't you see? It was all planned. I know destiny – isn't really your thing," she said, remembering his skepticism toward Aunt Wu and the swamp, "but it's the only logical reason."

Sokka sat on the ground, making a soft noise of despair and frustration. "Why?" Sokka struggled to keep his voice from cracking. "Why her?"

Katara kneeled down next to him. "It had to be someone brave and loving enough to be willing to give her life. Loving, but still focused on the big picture, willing to do what was best for everyone – even if that meant giving up happiness for herself, or for the people she loved."

They sat in silence for a moment. It was almost as though Yue had died again. They had never really talked about it while traveling with the Water Tribe convoy; they had almost been in a hurry to forget about the whole affair at the North Pole. Katara remembered those days spent sitting in silence, and wished she had done something more back then.

Toph wasn't able to contribute to the conversation when they talked about something that had happened in their past, the past that she hadn't been a part of. She felt bad listening to them mourn, though it was hard to sympathize when she didn't know who they were talking about. But that meant she could stay focused on the problem at hand.

"I have something to say," Toph said, breaking the silence. "Yesterday, I kind of attacked the old guy – Iroh. He made me tea and we talked. You know, he gives good advice; he really helped me. If it wasn't for him I might not have gone looking for you guys. So I owe him, too."

Sokka considered. Katara looked hopefully at him. Sokka noticed that she was waiting for his say-so, and then he seemed to deflate. "Fine, you and Toph can go see the firebenders. Aang and I are staying put."

"Really?" Katara smiled, pleasantly surprised. "Thanks, Sokka."

He held up his hands. "Hey, I'm only okay with this because Toph's going with you, and I've seen her take out a dozen master benders in one fell swoop. Miss Blind Bandit – you're the chaperone, and Katara's bodyguard."

"If you say so," Toph said noncommittally as she started to walk away.

"Good luck," Aang offered, waving good-bye.

"Thanks," Katara said. _We might need it,_ she thought to herself.

When they had walked some distance from the camp, Toph spoke up loudly. "Are your relationships always this complicated?"

Katara chuckled darkly. "You have no idea."

* * *

><p>One of the few things that Zuko had gained from his time at sea was first aid training. It was something Iroh had insisted he learn; and, as usual, he was right about what Zuko needed to know.<p>

He couldn't transport Iroh unconscious, and he didn't want to run the risk of crossing paths with Azula again. So they remained in the deserted Earth Kingdom town – or what was left of it, after the flames from the battle died out. Zuko managed to gently drag his uncle into the crumbling remains of a building. At least now they were hidden and somewhat sheltered; it felt safer than camping out in the open.

Zuko bandaged Iroh's shoulder up as best as he could with their meager supplies. Iroh remained unconscious for some time. Zuko kept watch over his uncle, trying to feel nothing. Trying to hide from the feeling that was gnawing at him, the burdensome weight of responsibility. He didn't know what he could do, except wait for Iroh to wake up. He found himself checking the old man's pulse more frequently than necessary. It became compulsive, as though he had to reassure himself that the old man was alive, that he wasn't alone.

No, they weren't alone. He could hear – almost sense – at least one person outside. Zuko stood and went to the doorway, looking out into the underbrush. There were small bushes and boulders outside, where potential enemies could be hiding.

Then, a voice. "They're in there."

Zuko leapt out of the building, his arms poised in a stance, ready for an attack. "Who's there?"

"It's me!"

Zuko froze when he heard the familiar voice. Then Katara and the blind earthbender cautiously turned the corner and came into view.

Zuko lowered his stance slightly. "Katara?"

"Hi, Zuko." She raised her hand in a halfhearted wave.

Zuko didn't wave back. She was the last person he wanted to see right now. Even Azula would have been better; if he saw her, he could make her pay for what she had done. But Katara … when she showed up, she just made things even more complicated than they already were.

"What are you doing here?" Zuko's voice was flat, not accusatory, but not welcoming either.

"We wanted to see if your uncle was okay," Toph said.

Zuko glanced back at the shed where he and Iroh had taken shelter. Katara stepped forward hesitantly. "If you want, I could heal him," she offered, holding up her canteen.

"I told you to stay away," Zuko said, openly hostile now.

Katara backed off. "I was just trying to help," she said coolly.

"Well, I don't want your help!" Zuko exclaimed angrily. "I can take care of the both of us, by myself!"

Toph spoke up quietly. "I said the same thing to your uncle yesterday."

Zuko and Katara both turned to look at her in surprise. "What?" he said.

"He told me there's nothing wrong with letting people who lo- – care about you, help you." Toph tilted her head thoughtfully. "He also said something about three cups of tea, but that's a different story."

She couldn't see Katara's eyes light up in recognition. But then Katara shook her head and focused on Zuko. "You may not believe this, but you aren't the only person who cares about Iroh."

Zuko glared at her, but at the same time he seemed to be studying her.

"I know you don't want us around right now," Toph said, and her voice was more gentle than Katara had ever heard it before. "But if you need us, well, we're right here."

Katara stared at her, wondering how her friend had managed to say exactly what she felt herself. Toph started to walk away, and after glancing once more at Zuko's back, Katara made to follow her.

"Wait."

They stopped, and turned back to face him. Zuko was looking at the ground, his hands clenched at his sides. Then he turned and walked back into the building. "Come on."

Katara allowed herself a small, unseen smile, before she and Toph followed him into the ruined building.

Iroh was lying on a pallet, his clothes ripped, a bandage on his injured shoulder and chest. "He hasn't woken up yet," Zuko said quietly.

Katara kneeled down next to Iroh. For months, when she thought of him, she saw either the kindly teacher on Zuko's ship, or the fierce firebending master at the Spirit Oasis. But now, he looked older, frailer. She wondered if injuries could cause a person's years to catch up with them.

Katara gently unwrapped the bandages on his shoulder, and pulled her water skin into her lap. She could feel Zuko's eyes on her as she covered her hand with the water, and knew that they were both remembering the first few times she had used her healing abilities.

While she worked, she kept stealing glances at Zuko. The prince had always been pale, but now his face was thin, and worry lines had eroded his hard face. Whenever her eyes flickered toward him, he was staring at Iroh; but when she looked away, she could feel him watching her as her hands moved the water over Iroh's wound.

"Well?" Zuko said finally. "How is he?"

"Well, the good news is, he's not paralyzed. His shoulder and back may hurt for a while, but I don't think there's any permanent damage." Katara bended the remaining water back into her canteen; then she turned to look directly at Zuko. "How was his health before this happened?"

Zuko was silent for a moment before answering. "I don't know. We were traveling separately."

"For how long?"

"A few weeks. Before that … well, neither of us has been our best. When we left the North Pole, we floated on a raft – really a piece of driftwood – for three weeks, with no food or water."

Katara looked mildly horrified. "I had no idea," she said softly.

"Just wait," Zuko said grimly; now that he'd started he felt he may as well finish. "We were both deemed traitors, because of what happened at the North Pole. So now we have my own family's forces tracking us." He paused. "What was your question again?"

"How was Iroh before he was injured yesterday? I guess I know now. Losing weight, but not dehydrated – I guess it's a good thing he loves tea so much." Katara smiled briefly, and then finished wrapping the fresh bandages. She patted the old man's shoulder. "He's been through a lot already. I think he'll make it through this."

Zuko said nothing, just stared at his inert uncle. Acting somewhat on an impulse, Katara put a hand on his shoulder. Zuko breathed through his nose, making something between a sigh and a sound of contentment. Katara rested her forehead against her hand, leaning into him a little bit. Just her way of saying _I'm here_.

"Zuko? I know I shouldn't be, but … I'm glad to see you again."

Zuko looked at her. Katara lifted up her head and smiled at him. Gradually his expression melted into a small smile as well. Then she looked away; Zuko wondered if she was blushing, and whether it was out of pleasure or embarrassment.

"Aw, you guys are sweet," someone cooed.

Zuko spun around, startled. Katara was already summoning what was left of her water. "Toph, you make one comment, and I swear –"

"Relax, sweetness," the earthbender said carelessly. "I won't tell Aang or Sokka."

"There's nothing to tell!" Katara insisted.

"Whatever," Toph smiled, shrugging and walking away.

"'Sweetness'?" Zuko repeated. Katara couldn't tell if he was incredulous or amused.

"I don't know what it is with her and nicknames," Katara said, sounding slightly irritated. A smile flickered across Zuko's mouth.

They sat in silence for a moment, not quite sure what to do with themselves.

"It's been a long time, hasn't it?" Katara half-smiled wistfully.

"Yeah. It has."

There was a pause. Then Katara started again. "I don't suppose there's any way we could …"

"No." Zuko's voice was firm. "There isn't."

Katara merely looked at him. She hadn't really expected him to say yes – to agree to any kind of alliance or relationship – but it still stung, more than it should have.

Without warning, Iroh moved, shifting in his sleep. Katara gasped, and Zuko looked startled. Iroh was murmuring something.

Katara looked to Zuko. "What'd he say? Lieutenant?"

"No. Lu Ten."

"Who's Lu Ten?" Katara asked, sounding almost afraid.

"My cousin," Zuko said flatly. "He's dreaming, or hallucinating." He knelt down against Iroh and gently shook his arm. "Uncle. Uncle Iroh."

The old man's eyes finally opened, blinking into the sunlight that poured in through the demolished roof.

"You were unconscious," Zuko said, looking down with concern. "Azula did this to you. It was a surprise attack."

Iroh very slowly raised himself so he was sitting upright. "Somehow that is not so surprising," he said, gently fingering the new bandages.

"We … I guess you could say we have visitors." Iroh followed Zuko's gaze, and saw Katara leaning over him, looking happy to see him.

Iroh's face crinkled into a smile. "As I live and breathe," he said fondly. "Katara of the Water Tribe."

"It's good to see you – you know, living and breathing," Katara offered. She turned to glance at Toph. "I think you two already met?"

Toph held up her hand in greeting. "Hey. Remember me?"

"Of course. Though I don't think we were introduced."

"Toph Bei Fong."

"Iroh of the Fire Nation."

Toph joined them sitting on the floor. "So, you found your nephew," she said conversationally.

"And you found your friends," Iroh said with a smile, nodding toward Katara.

Zuko was silent. So Iroh _had_ been looking for him. Iroh might not have gotten hurt if he hadn't been trying to help Zuko, who had chosen to strike out on his own and leave behind the only amiable family member he had left.

Katara brought out the bag of food they had brought. "Are you hungry or thirsty?"

"Tea would be wonderful."

"I'll do it." Zuko stood and found Iroh's tea service in their small pile of belongings, before going out of the building. Katara watched him leave, wondering why he was so quick to slip away when his uncle had just woken up.

"Tell me truthfully." Katara looked at Iroh. "Is he all right?"

Iroh sighed and shrugged. "I would be obliged if you found out for me."

Katara glanced back at the exit, and then stood and went out. She found Zuko using firebending to start a small fire, over which he set Iroh's teapot. She hesitated, trying to think of something they could talk about before she approached him.

"Zuko?"

He glanced at her as she came over and sat down next to him. "That girl who fought us – you called her Azula – she's your sister, isn't she?"

Zuko was silent for a moment, his face hard. "Yes."

"We saw them once before, in Omashu."

He looked surprised, and then confused. "Them?"

"She's with two other girls – one of them had two names, or something –"

Zuko narrowed his eyes. "Ty Lee?"

"Yeah, I think that's it. And there's a third – she complained that capturing us was boring." Katara looked nonplussed at this.

"Mai," Zuko murmured.

"Do you know them, too?"

Zuko shrugged. "They went to school with my sister. They used to visit us sometimes."

"Were you friends with them?"

Zuko considered, a brooding expression on his thin face. "People seemed to expect us to be. But they just did whatever Azula said, and that included driving me insane." He made a face. "Azula and Ty Lee tried to set me up with Mai."

Katara covered her hand with her mouth; Zuko was sure he heard a giggle escape. "How old were you?"

"I don't know … ten?"

"That's _so_ cute!"

Zuko snorted. "Yeah, it's really _cute_ that she shows up six years later to take me prisoner. Does she expect me to like her if she helps ruin my life?"

Katara's face was wiped of any humor. Zuko froze, realizing he'd said the wrong thing. He looked away. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Right."

"I mean it."

"I believe you."

"Okay," Zuko said uncertainly.

"Okay."

"Fine."

"Fine." Katara stood and walked away. Zuko looked up, slightly dismayed.

"Katara." She stopped, and turned to look at him. Zuko stood up. "Thank you, for …" He trailed off, and then said more firmly, "Thank you."

"You are welcome." Katara shuffled her feet. "So … this is good-bye?"

"I guess so."

"All we ever do is say good-bye," Katara complained.

"I know." Zuko looked away, so she wouldn't see the sadness in his eyes.

"I just don't want to leave without knowing that you're all right," Katara said plaintively.

"Well, Uncle's awake. I'd say that's pretty good."

"You aren't going to separate again, are you?" She spoke again before he could answer. "He needs you, Zuko; and you need him."

Zuko nodded mutely. He followed Katara back into the building, where Toph was chatting with Iroh.

"Toph. We should get going. Before Sokka gets worried."

Toph stood, obedient for once. She waved to the firebenders. "See ya around."

"Thank you very much." Iroh bowed to the girls. Then Zuko led them outside.

Katara thought about giving him a good-bye kiss on the cheek, but decided against it. Instead, she offered her hand. "Take care of yourselves."

Zuko squeezed her hand, palm-to-palm. "Okay. You too."

Katara smiled and then turned to follow Toph out of the ghost town. She didn't look back, so she didn't see Zuko looking around the corner of the building, watching them leave.

"You're letting them go? Just like that?" Iroh questioned.

Zuko drew his head back into the building. "Uncle. Don't start. We have nothing more to say to each other."

"They just showed us a great kindness. That counts for something –"

"I _know_!" Zuko sighed, trying to quell his frustration. For a moment he felt broken, like he needed someone – Katara – to lean on, to comfort him, just to be with him. And he was letting her go.

He couldn't go after the Avatar; at least not today. It wouldn't be right, when Katara and Toph had come to help him and Iroh. And yet, he didn't think he wanted, or had it in him, to make total peace with the Avatar and his gang.

Zuko could only make decisions on a day-to-day basis. He didn't want to make any long-term decisions. Everything about his life now seemed temporary; he just had to find what it was that he wanted for the future.

* * *

><p>The girls walked in silence for some time, before lapsing into conversation. "So, what's your status?" Toph asked.<p>

Katara blinked at her. "Huh?"

"Are you in love with Zuko?"

Katara's face felt hot. Before she could stammer a response, Toph spoke again. "You know, I could feel yours and Zuko's heartbeats, with my earthbending," she informed her. "They kept speeding up at different times; that could mean fear, or nervousness."

"Well … I think we felt both," Katara said honestly. "But, to answer your question … I don't think we're in love anymore." Toph noted the sadness in Katara's voice. "That is, if we ever were in the first place," Katara added. "I know we had feelings for each other, but I don't know where the line is where you 'fall in love'."

There was a pause. Then Toph asked, "How old are you?"

"Fourteen – almost fifteen."

"Is that young to be in love?" Toph tried to keep the curiosity out of her voice. Katara looked at her, realizing that she must have very limited knowledge of what love was supposed to be like. She wasn't just young, she was an only child, and had a … strained relationship with her parents.

"I think it might be. In the Water Tribes you have to be at least sixteen to get married." Katara lowered her voice, even though it wasn't really necessary. "That girl we were talking about, Yue? She and Sokka had feelings for each other. But when she came of age, she was betrothed to a warrior from the Northern Water Tribe. She died before she could choose either way."

"That's so sad." Toph sounded unusually quiet and serious.

"I know." Katara sighed. Love and war were hard enough on their own; it was even harder to have to deal with both of them at once. Their friendships were the only things that helped them to get through such trials.

"Toph? Thanks for coming with me," Katara said quietly. She hadn't wanted to see them by herself; and Toph had given some moral support, both to Katara and to Zuko.

"Don't mention it." Toph smiled and punched Katara's arm playfully. "What are friends for?"

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> After _The Legend of Korra_ aired its season finale, my sisters and I started our summer-long project of re-watching _Avatar: The Last Airbender_, most episodes of which can be viewed online. Watching the first season episodes is making me nostalgic for the first half of this story … and looking back at how I wrote it, I'm slightly tempted to tweak some parts of it. Nothing would change in the plot, but certain details could be added, and some chapters could be lengthened or shortened. (I'm just not sure how that would affect the number and reviews/comments.)


	28. Sandy Psychology

_Published July 30, 2012_

**Author's Note:** This story has surpassed 200 reviews! Thank you readers! I am grateful! If you're an aspiring writer like me, I pray that God will help you hone your talent and grant you success, in your career and in life.

Please let me know what you think of the way I narrated this chapter. It turned out much longer than I'd intended. I tried to include the most significant scenes, while skimming over or summarizing the rest. Do you think it works?

* * *

><p>"Sandy Psychology"<p>

"People are experts at self-justification, Celeste," Mr. Chisholm was saying when the party noise finally faded into the distance. He took the awful black thing from Celeste, then stood and held it carefully with his fingertips, looking down at it. "In the cold light of day people bury their sins quickly and turn their heads away. But the earth … the earth, as you see, is much slower to forgive and forget." ~ Vicki Grove, _The Starplace_

When they returned to camp, Aang was meditating, and Sokka was sharpening his boomerang. They glanced up when the girls returned to the plateau.

"So? How'd the little reunion go?" Sokka asked, turning his boomerang so it shone in the sunlight.

"It was alright," Katara said with a shrug. "Iroh is healed and conscious. I'm not worried anymore."

Toph kicked at the ground, getting a feel for the campsite. "Is Aang asleep sitting up?" she asked.

Aang cracked an eye open. "No, just meditating. Unless you're ready to start the earthbending lessons," he added hopefully.

"First, let's find a good place to train."

Sokka leapt to his feet, eager to leave the immediate area. "Good idea. All aboard Appa!"

They hadn't really set up camp, so there was little to do to pack up before they all climbed into the saddle. Katara climbed into the end near Appa's tail, and rested her arms on the siderail, watching as the terrain became smaller below them. She knew that she was leaving Zuko and Iroh behind (again), and her friends knew that she knew it.

* * *

><p>Aang was thrilled when they found the perfect earthbending training ground, an expansive rock quarry. There were terraces and outcroppings and overhangs of stone—an earthbender's paradise.<p>

He started out very enthusiastic, but became confused when he wasn't able to bend, at least not as easily as Toph. He could carry stones and boulders of massive weights, but he couldn't manipulate earth the way he could air and water.

Aang had had frustrating teachers before. Jeong Jeong had been all about limits and restraint—but he turned out to be right about needing to be careful about fire. Pakku had been stern and yet somehow indifferent, until Aang and Katara proved how good they were and how much they wanted to learn.

Toph was demanding and a tough teacher, but at least she was trying to get him to embrace this element. Her teaching style was different but not bad; it was Aang's own shortcomings as a bender that were holding him back.

He was more frustrated with himself than with Toph. He didn't defend himself when she yelled at him; he figured he deserved it.

Aang wanted to stay on good terms with her, and show her the respect a student should have for a teacher. So he kept his complaints to himself. Until Katara tried to talk about it.

"You know this block you're having is only temporary, right?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Aang said dejectedly. Katara knew it was the first time Aang had had trouble with an element, when bending it didn't come naturally to him.

"You do know that's the problem, don't you? If you face this issue instead of avoiding it …"

"I know, I get it, alright!" Aang let the ball of water fall back into the pond. "I need to face it head-on, like a rock. But I just can't do it! I don't know why I can't, but I can't." He felt all right venting to her, because they had already been friends, as well as a master and a student, for some time.

Katara could sympathize with him, remembering her own frustration when she struggled to learn new waterbending techniques.

"Aang. If fire and water are opposites, then what's the opposite of air?" She already knew the answer, from Iroh's lesson so long ago, but she wanted to hear it from Aang.

"I guess it's earth," Aang realized.

"That's why this is so hard for you," Katara reasoned. "You're working with your natural opposite. But you'll figure it out. I know you will."

Aang smiled faintly. As they returned to the shore, he asked, "Do you think opposites can, you know—coexist? Work together?"

Katara smiled. "Well, it happens all the time in nature. And sometimes with people, too."

Maybe she hadn't ought to, but Katara decided to talk to Toph again. She was on a boulder, picking her toes. "If you're here to criticize my teaching methods, I don't really want to hear it," Toph said before she had begun.

Katara looked at her, calm and unfazed. "I'm not. I just think you should know, Aang is just as disappointed in himself as you are." She paused. "But you have to admit, most people would run if they saw a huge boulder coming toward them. That was a bit extreme, asking him to stand his ground for that."

"_You're_ not afraid to stand your ground," Toph said. "When you argued with Sokka earlier today, and then with Zuko? You made your point and didn't back down."

Katara laughed a little. "I've been told I'm just naturally stubborn."

"Like a rock," Toph said, looking amused.

While Aang was meditating, Toph made a decision. If straightforward teaching wouldn't work, she'd have to try a different way, an indirect way. Almost like reverse psychology. Plus, it might be fun to mess with him.

In Earth Rumble VI, when The Boulder hesitated to attack, Toph had goaded him into fighting. She wondered if she could get Aang to earthbend if she provoked him, got him angry enough to stand up to her.

It didn't work right away. He tried to protest when Toph used his staff as a nutcracker, but then he let her walk away.

She took the staff with her when, at Katara's request, she left the campsite to look for Sokka, who hadn't returned from his food search. Toph found him soon enough, and immediately felt what the problem was: Sokka was stuck deep in a narrow crevice in the ground. And he wasn't alone; Aang had just found him. Toph heard him inform Sokka that he couldn't earthbend him out.

Aang didn't even believe that he _could_. That wasn't good.

She heard Sokka mention her. "If you can't earthbend me out of here, go get Toph."

"I can't do that either. … It would just be really—uncomfortable." Toph wrinkled her nose, hearing Aang say that about her. She tried to listen to the rest of what they were saying. "This whole earthbending thing really has me confused. There's so much pressure. Everyone expects me to get it right away. It puts me in a really awkward position."

"Awkward position … I think I know the feeling." What was with that tone of voice? Did Sokka think Aang meant something else about Toph?

"If I try, I fail. But if I don't try, I'm never going to get it. I feel like I'm caught between a rock and a hard place."

Toph smirked. What a fitting comparison. If only Aang would be more like the rock in the metaphor.

She sensed the adult sabertooth mooselion coming before they did; she was _going_ to warn them, but then they saw it for themselves. She was _going_ to help them, but then, she was curious as to how Aang would handle it. Sokka was stuck, so running away wasn't an option; he'd have to stay where he was to defend the two of them. Aang failed once more to bend the earth; but then Toph felt wind and knew he was using airbending to fend off the animal. He blew it backwards, and then it left.

Aang had won.

Toph clapped slowly, smiling with her eyes closed. "What are you doing here?" She could hear Sokka's incredulity.

"Just enjoying the show," she replied.

"What? You were there the whole time?" Aang exclaimed.

"Pretty much."

"Why didn't you do something?" Now Aang sounded angry, which satisfied Toph, though she didn't show it. "Sokka was in trouble! I was in trouble! You could've gotten him out and helped us get away!"

Toph shrugged. "I guess it just didn't occur to me." She tossed a nut onto the ground and pulled out Aang's staff to crack it. But as she started to bring it down, something stopped her. Aang had grabbed it.

"Enough!" Aang said forcefully. "I want my staff back!" He pulled it away from her. Toph stood and jumped off of the rock to stand in front of him. To Aang's amazement, she was still smiling.

"Do it now."

"What?"

"Earthbend, twinkletoes. You just stood your ground against a crazy beast; and even more impressive, you stood your ground against me. You've got the stuff."

"But …"

"DO IT!" She wasn't going to let his own lack of confidence get in the way of his bending.

Aang looked at her in confusion; then he obeyed, stomping down on the ground and punching his fist forward. As he did so, a large rock moved, shooting through the air and crashing into a ridge.

"You did it!" Toph said excitedly. "You're an earthbender."

"I can't believe it!" Aang exclaimed happily.

Sokka watched the whole exchange. "Aww, this is really a wonderful, touching moment," he said, his voice laced with sweet sarcasm. "So, could you get me out of here so I can give you both a big, snuggly hug?"

In the end Toph dragged him out; but no one gave anyone a big, snuggly hug.

Aang had learned a few things. One was that it was okay to treat Toph like a regular kid, or challenge her, or get mad at her. Maybe she'd been waiting for him to do that all along.

* * *

><p>After a few days, Toph felt like she'd fallen into the rhythm of life with the group.<p>

They lived like they were on a constant camping trip. Sokka was the one who found food, while Katara was the one who prepared it. When the weather was pleasant, they would forego setting up a tent and sleep under the night sky. Toph and Aang both preferred resting without the comfort of sleeping bags. Aang was fine with leaves for a pillow; Toph liked to sleep on the ground in an earth tent.

When Toph asked what they typically did, the answer was, "Everything, and nothing."

She trained Aang in earthbending.

They were working to defeat the Fire Lord.

But there wasn't much else to do in their abundant free time.

That was why they took field trips, as Aang explained to her. Toph thought that sounded promising, traveling with a purpose instead of flying around aimlessly. Plus, it was fun to have a break from intense training.

It was Katara's idea to visit the Misty Palms Oasis, where they met Professor Zei; but it was Sokka's decision to look for the legendary library that the anthropologist sought. It was just like him to turn a trip that should have been a vacation into a mission.

"Uh, hey? What about me?" Toph asked. "When do I get to pick?"

Sokka answered, with a very slight edge to his voice, "You have to work here a little longer before you qualify for vacation time."

Toph pouted.

"Don't worry," Aang said to her, "you'll get your vacation. I promise."

Toph's lip curled into a smile. "Okay. But I'm going to hold you to that."

"Of course there's the matter of finding the library," Professor Zei said. "I've made several trips into the Si Wong Desert, and almost died each time." His tone was depressed. "I'm afraid that desert's impossible to cross."

Aang and Sokka exchanged glances. "Professor, would you like to see our sky bison?"

When they went outside, they found Appa growling at several men dressed from head to toe in sand-colored rags. "Sandbenders!" Zei shouted. "Shoo! Away from the bison!" The strange men retreated. Toph was curious, wondering if they were earthbenders who could manipulate sand, but Zei was much more interested in the sky bison before them.

They spent hours flying over the desert. If it felt long to the others, it was doubly tedious for Toph, who teasingly reminded them that she couldn't help them spot the library.

"I wonder if we're looking for the wrong thing," Aang said thoughtfully, furrowing his brow.

"What do you mean?" Toph asked.

"I don't know … all I know is spirits aren't always straightforward. You have to be careful and open-minded with them."

"Whatever." Toph pushed her sweaty bangs out of her face.

They finally landed, just to investigate something Sokka had spotted: a tower spire sticking up out of the sand.

"Forget it," Katara said sadly. "It's obviously not what we're looking for. The building in this drawing is enormous."

They were thinking of boarding Appa again, when they turned and spotted something coming down from one of the sand dunes a short distance away. It was a large gray fox, carrying a scroll in its mouth. It paused to look at the group, but then continued on its way past them.

"What kind of animal is that?" Sokka wondered aloud. It somewhat resembled a wolf, the animal on which the Water Tribe warriors based the design of their uniforms. The fox ran up to the base of the tower, and then, to their amazement, began running up the wall, sideways.

"I think that was one of the knowledge seekers," Professor Zei said, just before the fox jumped through the window at the top of the spire. "Oh, we must be close to the library!"

Aang, Sokka, and Katara looked at Zei's drawing, and then at the structure before them. "No, this _is_ the library," Sokka said loudly. "Look!" He pointed to the top of the drawing, whose spire matched the one before them. "It's completely buried."

This conclusion was met with a brief, stunned silence.

"Wow," Katara said, simultaneously impressed and disappointed. "We actually found what we were looking for. Only now we can't use it."

Professor Zei fell to his knees. "My life's ambition is now full of sand," he mourned. But just as quickly he perked up. "Well, time to start excavating."

Toph walked past her friends and pressed her hand against the curved wall. "Actually, that won't be necessary. The inside seems to be completely intact, and it's _huge."_

"That fox thingy went in through a window," Sokka said. "I say we climb up there and give it a look."

Toph folded her arms. "I say you guys go ahead without me."

"You got something against libraries?" Katara asked, though not unkindly.

"I've held books before," Toph said ambivalently, "and I have to tell you, they don't exactly do it for me."

That was the second time in one day that they had forgotten that she was blind, which _did_ impose some limits on things she could do. "Oh, right," Katara said, laughing sheepishly. "Sorry."

"Let me know if they have something you can listen to," Toph suggested.

Aang paused, watching Sokka tie a rope to his boomerang to use as a grappling hook. "How about I try to find a book to read to you? Then you can still get something out of this vacation."

Toph shrugged. "Maybe." She wasn't sure whether or not she liked the idea of having one of her friends read to her like a child. But she could tell Aang had offered it to be kind, because that's the type of person he was.

Aang petted Appa reassuringly. "Don't worry, buddy. I'm not making you go underground ever again," he promised, remembering the Cave of Two Lovers. "You can stay out here with Toph."

She could hear the huge animal grunt in response. She turned her face in the direction the others were going in, and then back to the sky bison she would be staying with. "What's up?" she said, just to break the silence.

* * *

><p>Perhaps it was good that Toph hadn't come, because the others already had to search themselves for knowledge to contribute to the library. Everyone gave either something worthless, or something very important to them.<p>

Katara's was the latter type. "I have an authentic waterbending scroll." She had come so far in waterbending that she no longer needed the scroll for guidance or even for teaching. But it had carried a sense of nostalgia, as a souvenir of an encounter that had forever changed Katara and Zuko. That scroll had caused so much change.

_"And to think, none of this would have happened if I hadn't stolen that waterbending scroll! Who would have thought that all this would happen because of it?"_

_ "Destiny is strange that way. A simple purchase, a small gesture, a word of kindness, all can have unforeseen effects."_

Wong Shi Tong swiped the scroll out of her hands. Katara was slightly surprised at her own lack of emotion when this happened. She didn't feel as though she was losing anything. The scroll carried memories, which she would hold on to, but she didn't need the scroll itself any longer.

Maybe she had already moved on.

While Sokka searched for materials about the Fire Nation, Katara found a section on medicine. Remembering Iroh's recent injury, she wondered if there was any information about lightning wounds.

"Professor Zei? Do you have some paper I could write on?"

"Of course!" The scholar had come fully prepared. He handed Katara some blank paper and a pen. Thus armed, she took a few medical books down from the shelves and started flipping through them, taking notes on relevant passages.

She found one account of a man who was struck by lightning twice and survived. The healers he met with had varying arguments for how it had been possible. One of them argued that he may have died upon one strike, and come back upon the second, an incident of rejuvenation (though others mockingly called it resurrection).

The idea made sense in Katara's mind. She knew that a person who drowned could appear dead, but if they had the water pumped out and air pumped back into their lungs, before their organs failed, then they could live.

Maybe lightning worked the same way? If so much electricity could stop a person's heart, could the same amount be used to restart it?

She barely had time to jot down this theory before Sokka called them away to a section of the library that seemed promising to him. She tucked the paper under her shirt, next to Pakku's vial of water from the Spirit Oasis, and quickly followed their others.

* * *

><p>"So … you like flying?" Toph asked, taking a halfhearted stab at conversation. It had been a long time since she tried to bond with an animal, and she'd never really gotten to know Appa in her short time with the group.<p>

Appa responded with a grunt. Toph went on, "Of course, I'm more comfortable on the ground, where I can see. Well, I don't _see_ the way you do. I feel the vibrations in the ground with my feet." Toph scooped up a handful of sand, so unlike the dirt back in Gaoling. "But this sand is so loose and shifty, it makes everything look fuzzy."

Appa sat up and yawned. "Not that there's anything wrong with fuzzy," Toph said quickly.

She was getting hot. She got up to stretch her legs, and walked around Appa, trying to find a shady spot where she couldn't feel the strong sun.

"I already told you, I don't want to snuggle," Toph said, a little grumpy. Then she fell backwards as Appa stood up behind her. She got to her feet, and then she felt and heard the rumble that had disturbed Appa. It wasn't just near her; she could feel it _under_ her.

"The library's sinking," Toph realized, feeling an unfamiliar sensation—panic. "_The library's sinking!_" She rushed to the tower and braced her hands against the stone and ceramic structure. But as she tried to push up against the building, her feel sank into the loose sand, and the library continued to move. Toph stepped away, and then attempted to earthbend by punching her fist into the ground; but she couldn't adequately move the sand, or send vibrations through it to the library itself.

She turned around and once again hit the tower, putting all of her strength into withholding the stone building. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt such a strain; usually earthbending and fighting were almost effortless.

It was the first time Toph had ever felt truly afraid. What if her friends were buried in the library? Would they die? Then what would happen to her? She needed them; she probably wouldn't survive without them; and besides, they were what made her life worth living.

Appa turned his back to her and growled, alerting Toph to yet another new danger. She turned her head so her ears were facing whatever, or whoever, was coming. "What is it now?" Toph said through gritted teeth. She sensed rather than heard new presences, as they moved silently behind her. "Who's there?"

She could feel sand whipping around her, almost as though it were being bended. Toph remembered the sandbenders they had seen at the Misty Palms Oasis. Had they followed the group out here?

Appa was crying out and she could hear voices, men grunting and groaning from strain. Someone shouted, "Put a muzzle on him!"

Appa sounded just as scared as Toph felt. She turned her head to shout a threat over her shoulder. "Don't make me put this down!" She made a split-second decision: she let go of the spire and turned around to attack, trying to bend a wave of sand at Appa's assailants. She had no way of knowing if she was hitting her target. Meanwhile she could feel the library moving again at a rapid drop. She turned again and braced her hands against it. "No, stop sinking!"

She had two crises on her hands, and she couldn't handle one without abandoning the other.

Toph made a final attempt, turning to bend more sand at opponents whose presence she couldn't even be certain of. Again she had to turn her attention back on the library; and now the sounds of struggle were gone, as Appa and the sandbenders faded from her already blurred vision. "No!"

Toph bowed her head, knowing she couldn't go after them. "I'm sorry, Appa." She squeezed her eyes shut; she wouldn't allow herself to cry, all her strength and energy had to be focused on keeping the window above the ground level.

They had to be all right; she'd already lost Appa, she couldn't lose her friends too …

_What is taking them so long?_

After the longest minutes of her life, Toph heard Momo's chitter and Sokka and Katara's grunts behind her. Toph's arms hurt as she yanked her hands out of the holes they had formed in the tower; she fell backwards onto the ground, and knew that the library was disappearing. She felt dust blown into her face, and tried to shield her eyes, which were already stinging—possibly from unshed tears. Then the vibrations stopped, and everything was still.

"We got it! There's a solar eclipse coming." Sokka jumped up and hugged Katara ecstatically. "The Fire Nation's in trouble, now!"

It was Aang who first noticed that something was wrong. "Where's Appa?"

Toph was holding her head in her hands. She didn't turn to face him; she just shook her head, back and forth.

A moment later she heard Aang's slow, horrified gasp.

"Toph, what happened?" Katara asked.

"Sandbenders," Toph said, almost whispering. "They took Appa."

Everyone was silent as this horrible news sunk in. After a minute Toph slowly stood up, but then didn't know what to do next. The others were all looking out, in different directions, at the desert that surrounded them.

Suddenly Aang turned, rounding on Toph. "How could you let them take Appa? Why didn't you stop them?"

"I couldn't! The library was sinking! You guys were still inside and –" _I didn't want you to die. How could I choose a bison over you? I mean, really?_

"You could have come to get us! I could have saved him!"

"I can hardly feel any vibrations out here," Toph explained. "The sandbenders snuck up on me and there wasn't time for –"

"You just didn't care! You never liked Appa! You wanted him gone!"

"Well, I'm really sorry I saved your life instead of your bison!" Toph snapped.

"Stop it!" Katara came over and moved between them. "Aang, you know Toph did all she could. She saved our lives."

_You're welcome,_ Toph thought, not without some bitterness toward Aang.

"Who's going to save our lives now?" Sokka asked. He gestured to the vastness of the desert, which they had only been able to cover with Appa transporting them. "We'll never make it out of here."

"That's all any of you care about: yourselves!" Aang shouted. "You don't care whether Appa is okay or not!"

"Whoa! Speak for yourself!" Toph exclaimed. She was more indignant than angry. "Do _you_ care about the rest of _us_?" she asked. "Besides, the only way we'll be able to find Appa is if we survive the trip out of the desert."

"We're all concerned about Appa; but we can't afford to be fighting now." Katara remembered how easily they had deteriorated when Azula and her cohorts were chasing them. She couldn't let that happen again.

"I'm going after Appa." Aang opened his glider and took off.

"Aang!" Katara shouted in protest, but she couldn't stop him. Sadly, she spoke to the others. "We better start walking. We're the only ones who know about the solar eclipse. We have to get that information to Ba Sing Se."

Toph raised her eyebrows at this. So they had a destination, a goal beyond just getting out of the harsh desert. That was somewhat comforting.

"D'you think if we dig up the giant owl, he'll give us a ride?" Sokka asked as they started walking.

The sarcasm didn't amuse them. "We're lucky he didn't chase us once we made it outside," Katara said flatly.

"Giant owl?" Toph repeated. "Man, what did I miss?"

Sokka answered. "Well, Professor Zei decided to stay in the library—I guess he could be alive, in the Spirit World, or just buried under the sand. But I found out something about firebenders. They lose their bending during a solar eclipse—and there's going to be one a few months from now. That's our best opportunity to fight the Fire Lord."

Toph was silent for a few minutes. Sokka wondered if she was impressed by this discovery. Katara worried that she didn't understand what an eclipse was.

Then Toph spoke up, sounding more timid and uncertain than usual. "Is Aang—going to be okay?"

"I'm sure he will," Katara said, quiet and confident.

"He's not always this angst-y, is he?" Toph asked.

"Oh, no. Almost never. It's just hard now."

"I get that he's lost his pet, but still," Toph said.

"You don't understand," Katara started gently.

"Explain, then," Toph said, with an edge to her voice.

"Appa is the last piece of Aang's life before the war – the only thing in his life that's stayed the same, even though a hundred years passed while he was in the iceberg. Actually, Appa and Momo might be the last of their kind."

"We lost Appa once before," Sokka remembered.

"You mean in the swamp?" Katara asked after a moment.

"Yeah, and Aang was somehow able to use his Avatar powers to find Appa and Momo."

"I think that had to do with the fact that the tree was 'one big organism,'" Katara said.

They walked in silence after that, which was probably for the best, as talking would make their mouths dry of saliva, making them thirst more quickly.

Things only worsened as the day slowly wore on. The little water that they had tasted like a swamp. Sokka thought he was being smart by finding water in a cactus plant, but drinking it made him act drunk and crazy.

It was almost sunset before they saw Aang again. He returned on his glider, without Appa. He didn't look at his friends; he just kneeled down in the sand, bowing his head.

Katara was the first to approach him. "I'm sorry, Aang. I know it's hard for you right now, but we need to focus on getting out of here."

"What's the difference?" Aang said sullenly. "We won't survive without Appa. We all know it."

"Come on, Aang!" Katara was trying her best not to sound desperate. "We can do this if we work together. Right, Toph?" She looked to the blind girl for support.

Katara was an optimist; but Toph was a realist. She wasn't in despair, but she couldn't pretend everything was certain to be all right. "As far as I can feel, we're trapped in a giant bowl of sand pudding. I got nothin'." She felt strangely useless.

"Sokka? Any ideas how to find Ba Sing Se?"

She saw that Sokka was lying on his back, staring at the sky with a blissful smile. "Why don't we ask the circle birds?" he asked, pointing upwards. Katara looked up and realized he was referring to some buzzard wasps circling above them.

She lowered her gaze and looked at each of her friends. Toph, who was struggling to hold herself upright. Aang, who was sulking, subdued by grief and despair. Sokka, who was usually the plan-maker, but was now lying intoxicated in the sand.

Katara could almost feel a physical pressure on her, as the entire situation tried to weigh her down. She growled slightly, feeling almost angry, but more determined than anything else.

"We're getting out of this desert, and we're going to do it together," Katara said, in a tone that told them she meant business and no one was to question her decision. "Aang, get up. Everybody, hold hands." That's what you were supposed to do if you were stuck in a snowstorm, to make sure the group stayed together and nobody was lost.

"We can do this. We have to." That seemed to be the story of their lives.

Toph held onto Aang's hand and pulled Sokka along behind her. They walked that way for a long time, links of a single chain.

For the first time, Toph appreciated Katara's bossiness. She took charge of the situation and told them exactly what they had to do to help.

It was about midnight when she finally said that they could stop and rest. They drank the last of Katara's bending water. Katara stayed up a little longer than the others, studying the charts that Sokka had taken from the library.

She wondered if Zuko had ever felt this way, traveling aimlessly at sea. She wondered if he had learned how to navigate and use star charts. She knew that he had come close to despair, just as she was now.

_ "In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. That is the meaning of inner strength."_

Remembering Iroh's words made Katara feel stronger, almost more at peace. Now was her time to be resilient, like Zuko, and a leader, like Iroh. And like her father, the chief and warrior. He probably felt this way at times, too.

* * *

><p>After indulging herself in a few hours of sleep, Katara informed the others that they had to start again.<p>

An unexpected sighting brought two painfully hopeful moments to the group. First, Aang thought he saw Appa's silhouette against the moon, only to realize that it was just a cloud. That gave Katara an idea, for Aang to fly up and bend the water into her canteen, thinking it would help sustain the group. But when he returned, the pouch had less than a mouthful of water in it.

"Wow … there's hardly any in here," Katara said without thinking.

"I'm sorry, okay!" Aang shouted angrily. "It's a desert cloud; I did all I could! What's anyone else doing? What are you doing?"

Katara looked back at him in shock. "Trying to keep everyone together," she answered flatly. "Let's just get moving. We need to head in this direction."

Toph remembered how she and Katara had argued when she didn't do anything to help the group. Now, she actually felt kind of bad because she wasn't able to do anything to help the others or herself. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so … miserable.

The thought came before she could stop it: _If I hadn't left home, I wouldn't be dying of thirst and exhaustion now_.

Toph tried to bury that thought, the way she could pummel an opponent. She refused to think that way. She would _never_ regret leaving home. Emotions aside, she was convinced that leaving was the best decision she had made. And not just for herself, but also for her friends and her country.

Her sense of conviction was all but shattered when her foot hit something hard and she fell down in the sand.

All the complaints she'd been stifling rolled out like a rockslide. "Ow! Crud! I am so sick of not seeing where I'm going! And what idiot buried a boat in the middle of the desert?"

"A boat?" Katara repeated.

"Believe me, I kicked it hard enough to feel plenty of vibrations," Toph said sourly. She felt Aang airbending, blowing the sand away from whatever it was Toph had tripped on.

"It's one of the gliders the sandbenders use!" Katara exclaimed, sounding excited. "And look! It's got some kind of compass on it. I bet it can point us out of here. Aang, you can bend a breeze so we can sail it. We're going to make it!"

The four of them climbed onto the wooden structure. "I can't believe you found this—and you weren't even trying!" Katara marveled. Toph smiled, feeling a little bit of pride in her discovery.

Everyone felt their spirits lifted somewhat while they traveled on the desert boat. They were moving quickly, which meant they would get out of there sooner.

"This compass doesn't seem to be pointing north according to my charts," Katara remarked, sounding like Sokka for a moment.

Sokka himself was still somewhat intoxicated. "Take it easy, little lady. I'm sure the sand folks who built this baby know how to get around here."

Katara deliberately ignored him. Then she saw something in the distance, and gasped. "That's what the compass is pointing to! That giant rock! It must be the magnetic center of the desert."

"A rock? Yes!" Toph said happily. "Let's go!"

"Maybe we can find some water there," Katara said.

"Maybe we can find some sandbenders," Aang said darkly.

* * *

><p>The first thing they found was the buzzard-wasp hive. That's what the magnetic rock really was. Sokka later said that he couldn't decide which was worse, facing off against humans or against animals.<p>

On that day, Aang killed an animal for the very first time. The others missed it, while he was chasing after the buzzard-wasp that had caught Momo. Aang sent an airbending slice at the animal, cutting it in half.

Bending the earth made Toph feel empowered again; but she was just as blind to the air as to the sand. Again, she couldn't see where her opponents were.

It was Katara who turned her in the right directions. Toph smiled as she followed Katara's instructions for where to aim. She supposed this was the nature of teamwork: she needed them, and they needed her.

When they returned to the bottom of the rock structure, another strange thing happened: enormous pillars of sand rose up, frightening the buzzard-wasps away. When the sand fell away, they saw what had caused it to move, a group of sandbenders who had arrived on gliders. Aang landed next to his friends, and the four teenagers faced the sandbenders together.

"What are you doing in our land with a sandbender sailer?" their leader demanded. "From the looks of it, you stole it from the Hami Tribe."

Katara explained calmly. "We found the sailer abandoned in the desert. We're traveling with the Avatar. Our bison was stolen and we have to get to Ba Sing Se."

A younger sandbender stepped forward. "You dare accuse our people of theft while you ride in on a stolen sand sailer?" Toph's eyes narrowed, hearing the man's voice. It sounded familiar to her ears.

"Quiet, Gashuin," the leader scolded. "No one accused our people of anything. If what they say is true, we must give them hospitality."

"Sorry, Father."

Toph's eyes widened as she connected the voice with a memory. _"Put a muzzle on him!"_

"I recognize the son's voice," Toph said quietly to her friends. "He's the one that stole Appa."

"Are you sure?" Katara said.

"I never forget a voice."

Aang approached the group angrily, brandishing his staff. "You stole Appa! Where is he? What did you do to him?"

"They're lying!" Gashuin exclaimed indignantly. "They're the thieves!"

Aang swung his staff down, destroying one of the tribe's sand sailers with his blast of air. "_Where is my bison?_"

The question was met with terrified silence. "You tell me where he is now!" Aang demanded. Katara, Sokka, and the sandbenders watched in shock as he swung the end of his staff upward, obliterating another sand sailer.

"What did you do?" the leader asked his son.

"I-it wasn't me!"

Now Toph felt angry too. "You said to put a muzzle on him!"

"You _muzzled_ Appa?" Aang said, enraged. He was so furious, his eyes and arrow tattoos started to glow. He twirled his staff and destroyed of yet another sand sailer.

"I'm sorry!" Gashuin stammered. "I didn't know that it belonged to the Avatar!"

"Tell me where Appa is!" They could hear Aang's voice, but at the same time it sounded like another person speaking, sharp and dangerous.

"I traded him—to some merchants! He's probably in Ba Sing Se by now. They were going to sell him there!" Gashuin sounded frightened and desperate. "Please! We'll escort you out of the desert! We'll help however we can!"

Ba Sing Se. Toph had heard that name in the past, and the others had said they would have to go there to tell Earth Kingdom forces about the solar eclipse. It was the biggest city in the world. The last Earth Kingdom stronghold. The best place to hide. People came there to escape, to hide from whatever plagued them—poverty, or war, or personal trials. And apparently it was also a place for exotics goods, such as sky bison.

Something happened then, for the first time since Toph joined the group. She didn't know what was happening; but she could feel the wind picking up, swirling in a cyclone, pulling in sand and blowing it all around them. She'd never felt wind so fast or so strong.

"Just get out of here!" Sokka shouted, grabbing Toph by the shoulder and running away. "Run!"

Toph obeyed, and ran away. That _was_ something she did fairly often; she'd run away from home, and then from her new teammates. But now she wasn't sure what she was running from.

For the second time in as many days, Toph was frightened. Only this time, she had no idea what was happening; she knew, somewhere in the back of her mind, that this had more to do with spirits than with men.

"What's going on?" she screamed at Sokka.

"It's Aang!" he answered. Toph opened her mouth to protest, only to taste a mouthful of sand. "His Avatar Spirit is angry!"

Toph was surprised, and somehow didn't want to believe it. She wasn't scared of _Aang_ …

She had taken him for a wimp. But … by the badgermoles, he was powerful. And maybe dangerous.

What was happening to him? To her? She felt what little guilt she carried double at the thought that she had feared Aang. He was her friend.

It was over almost as quickly as it had begun. The wind slowed and after a moment it had calmed to a mere breeze, allowing the sand to settle.

"Katara calmed him down." She felt Sokka's hand squeeze her shoulder. "He's okay. It's going to be okay," he repeated. Neither of them was sure who he was really speaking to. "We made it out of the desert. We know where to look for Appa. And we know how to beat the Fire Nation. We can do this," Sokka swore.

"Where is he?" Toph's voice was slightly strained.

Sokka blinked at her, then turned her so she was facing Aang and Katara. She pulled away and walked slowly toward them. Now, all she could hear were muffled sobs.

Aang was crying.

Toph could feel some rock underneath the layer of sand on which she stood. She knew Katara was hugging Aang, letting him cry on her shoulder. Katara, who had known Aang for months, ever since he embarked on this quest to face his destiny.

Katara was the comforter in the group. Not Toph. She wasn't needed for that role.

Still, Toph walked up to them. Her voice shook when she spoke. "Aang?"

Katara and Aang opened their eyes to see her, close to tears herself. "I'm sorry. For everything."

"Toph," Katara began.

"Let me finish. I'm sorry I couldn't stop them. And I was no help getting through the desert either." And just now, instead of standing her ground and trying to calm him down, she had run away when he was hurting the most, leaving the comforting to someone who was good at it. Some friend she was.

Toph braced herself. "But I am going to help you find Appa. I'll make it up to you. I promise."

Aang looked at her silently. Toph hoped that he believed her. She couldn't see the sadness in his face or the tear stains on his cheeks. But she did hear Katara when she said, "Come here," stretching out an arm. Toph walked over and put her arms around both of them. A moment later she felt Sokka behind her. She was sandwiched between her three friends, but it was Aang she felt the most. He was the reason she had joined this strange group, agreed to go on this crazy adventure. She had agreed to help him; and in that respect, she wasn't going to fail him again.


	29. The Serpent's Pass

_Published August 28, 2012. Edited July 13, 2014._

"The Serpent's Pass

I do not know when I will see you again. Someday, perhaps, the world will indeed be quiet once more, but until the fires have been extinguished we must go our separate ways and risk our separate lives. ~ Lemony Snicket, _Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography_

* * *

><p>True to their word, the sandbenders gave them a ride out of the desert. The leader, Sha-Mo, tactfully sent his son to another sailer while Team Avatar rode on his. Aang sat on one side, not speaking, barely looking at their surroundings. Sokka spoke with Sha-Mo about the area and how they might get to Ba Sing Se. Katara sat on the side opposite Aang, wondering whether or not she should go and sit with him.<p>

Before she decided, Toph came over to her. "Can I talk to you?"

Katara blinked. "Of course."

Toph sat down cross-legged next to her. She lowered her voice, but Aang could still hear her. "What happened to Aang back there?"

Both Aang and Katara tensed. Toph went on, "All I know is Aang – didn't sound like himself, and then there was a huge wind, before Sokka pulled me away."

Katara took a deep breath, almost sighing. "Aang is the Avatar … but he's human, too. He feels emotions, just like the rest of us. I guess one way of putting it is: when you combine his human capacity for emotion and his spiritual capacity for power … you get the Avatar State."

"What is that?"

"It's the name for what happened to Aang when he found out they had sold Appa. There are two ways it can happen: if he's in danger, or if he's feeling strong negative emotions. It's not pleasant."

"For him, or for the people around him?" Toph asked. She wasn't being snarky; she was serious.

"Both," Katara answered.

"I'm ashamed to say it," Toph confided, "but I was scared of him."

Aang felt his cheeks burn with shame. He _had_ to learn to control his emotions.

"The Avatar State can save his life if he's in danger. But it also puts him at risk. When he talked to his past life, Avatar Roku, about it, he found out that if …" Katara hesitated. "It's awful to talk about … If he's killed in the Avatar State, that would end the reincarnation cycle. There wouldn't be an Avatar anymore."

For a moment Toph was silent, absorbing this information. "That's bad, right?"

"Aang was frozen in an iceberg for one hundred years. The absence of an Avatar was what allowed this war to happen. That's proof of how much the world needs the Avatar, to keep balance between the Nations."

* * *

><p>The sandbenders dropped them off at an oasis, near where the desert ended. Sha-Mo provided them with a supply of food for the next part of their journey. "I <em>am<em> sorry for what happened," he said softly.

After being in the desert for two days, the waterfall and pool seemed like paradise. Toph wouldn't go in the water, but splashed her feet in it while sitting on a rock. The others didn't ask why; Sokka was busy studying the maps from the library, while Katara and Aang were two waterbenders were ecstatic to be submerged in the element they had lacked for the past few days. It was so cool, after they'd been so hot; it was clean, after they'd been sweaty and coated with sand; it was refreshing, when before they'd been sluggish.

Now everyone felt a fair amount of energy.

After poring over the 5,000-year-old maps, Sokka planned out the best route, and explained it to the others. "We just got out of the desert, so we must be around here; and we need to go to Ba Sing Se, which is here," he said, pointing on the map. "It looks like the only passage connecting the South to the North is this sliver of land called the Serpent's Pass."

"Are you sure that's the best way to go?" Toph asked. She couldn't see the map, so she had no idea of whether what he said made sense. And she hadn't forgotten that going into the desert had been Sokka's idea in the first place.

"It's the only way," Sokka said. "I mean it's not like we have Appa to fly us there."

"Shush up about Appa," Katara scolded in a hushed voice. "Can't you at least try to be sensitive?" The two siblings looked up at Aang, gauging his reaction.

Aang looked at them with lidded eyes. When he spoke, his tone was calm. "Katara, it's okay. I know I was upset about losing Appa before, but I just want to focus on getting to Ba Sing Se, and telling the Earth King about the solar eclipse."

Katara looked at him in surprise. "Oh, well, okay. I'm glad you're doing better," she said, offering him a smile.

Toph wasn't convinced, but she let it go for now.

* * *

><p>Of course their plans would change, twice, before they finally started out.<p>

A group of travelers, including a married couple expecting a baby, showed them the way to Full Moon Ferry Landing, where ferries gave refugees passage across the bay.

Here Toph proved part of her value to the group—not as a bender, but as an aristocrat. She hadn't completely left behind her past; she had brought one item, a passport with her family seal on it. It was slightly ironic, that she had to hold on to her past and her family in order to do what she wanted, travel the world. Now, the passport bought the four of them, plus Momo, passage on the ferry.

"Thanks for that, Toph," Katara said gratefully as they walked away from the bureaucrat's desk.

"No problem. Glad to know I'm good for something."

Katara glanced at her, wondering what she meant by that. Then Sokka came running up to them, pulling one of the Bureaucrat's guards behind him.

"Guys, look who I found!" Sokka gestured to the uniformed guard. She was pretty young, not much older than Katara and Sokka.

Katara studied the girl. She _did _look somehow familiar, but she couldn't place it …

"Suki? Of Kyoshi Island?" Aang said.

"That's right," the girl said, beaming.

"Oh my gosh!" Katara exclaimed. "It's so good to see you!"

Toph cleared her throat, a not-so-subtle question in the sound. Sokka made the introductions. "Oh, Suki, this is Toph. She's teaching Aang earthbending. Toph, this is Suki, a friend of ours. She's the leader of a group of warriors—all girls."

"Nice," Toph said appreciatively.

They followed Suki up to a covered tower on the wall of the harbor, overlooking the landing on one side and the bay on the other.

"You look so different without your makeup, and the new outfit," Katara said, still trying to reconcile the appearance of the girl who stood before them with the memory she had of the Kyoshi Warrior.

"That crabby lady makes all the security guards wear them," Suki explained. She looked over at Sokka. "And look at you, sleeveless guy. Been working out?"

"I'll grab a tree branch and do a few chin touches every now and then, nothing major," Sokka said, sounding casual but proud.

Toph raised her eyebrows at this exchange, wondering vaguely if the two eldest kids had something between them.

"Are the other Kyoshi Warriors around?" Aang asked.

"Yeah. After you left Kyoshi, we wanted to find a way to help people. We ended up escorting some refugees, and we've been here ever since."

Katara smiled at this. She – and Iroh – had been right: things and people had a way of coming back to you, sometimes when you least expect it. It had happened with the Avatar, her necklace, Zuko and Iroh, and now Suki.

"So why are you guys getting tickets for the ferry?" Suki asked. "Wouldn't you just fly across on Appa?"

She knew something was wrong when everyone looked down at this question. It was Katara who answered sadly. "Appa is missing. We hope to find him in Ba Sing Se."

"I'm so sorry to hear that," Suki said, sounding surprised and concerned. She looked at Aang. "Are you doing okay?" Now everyone looked at him, waiting for his answer.

Aang's face hardened slightly. "I'm doing fine." Now he sounded annoyed. "Would everybody stop worrying about me?"

Before anyone could respond, someone called up to them from below. "Avatar Aang, you have to help us!" It was Ying, the pregnant woman. "Someone took all of our belongings. Our passports, our tickets … everything's gone!"

Aang called down to them. "I'll talk to the lady for you." He couldn't ignore someone who asked him for help. Besides, Ying and Than had showed them this cove in the first place; they had to help them in return, if they could.

But the bureaucrat was adamant. Since they didn't have passports, she wouldn't give them tickets. And Toph didn't think she would believe them if they claimed the family was with their group.

"What if we gave them our tickets?" Aang asked. It would slow down their search for Appa, but it was a small sacrifice to make.

"No!"

"But—"

"NEXT!"

Aang reluctantly walked away from the desk. Ying and her husband, Than, looked devastated. "Don't worry," Aang said, reassuring and firm. "You'll get to the city safely. I'll lead you through the Serpent's Pass."

* * *

><p>They gave their tickets away to a group of people who didn't have passports with them. Sokka only stopped complaining about this when Suki rejoined them, dressed in her Kyoshi Warrior uniform, and announced that she was going with them.<p>

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Sokka said.

Suki was surprised. "Sokka, I thought you'd _want_ me to come."

"I do, it's just …"

"Just what?" For a moment Suki wondered if he still doubted her abilities, because she was a girl.

"Nothing," Sokka said finally. "I'm glad you're coming." Suki didn't press the matter, but brushed past him to join the others.

They found

"Look at this writing," Ying said. "How awful."

"What does it say?" Toph asked. What words could make her so upset?"

Katara stepped forward to read the inscription. "It says, 'Abandon hope'."

"How can we abandon hope?" Ying said miserably. "It's all we have."

"I don't know," Aang said evenly. The others looked at him in surprise. "The monks used to say that hope is just a distraction. So maybe we _do_ need to abandon it."

"What are you talking about?" Katara said, sounding incredulous.

"Hope isn't going to get us into Ba Sing Se, and it's not going to find Appa. We need to focus on what we're doing right now, and that's getting across this pass." With that, he stepped through the gate—the first step in this part of their journey.

Aang's statement bothered Katara, but she didn't want to waste time or energy arguing about it. "Okay, if you say so."

Toph actually thought this trek was more enjoyable than a ferry ride would have been, at least for her. Here she was walking on her own element, not blundering through sand or traveling on water. Sure, the cliffside was a bit treacherous, but she could keep her friends safe using earthbending to catch them when they fell, or divert a rock falling down on them. Sokka seemed strangely on edge about it—no pun intended.

The most eventful thing that happened was that a Fire Nation ship spotted the group. Suki explained, "The Fire Nation controls the western lake. Rumor has it they're working on something big on the other side, and they don't want anyone to find out what it is."

At dusk they set up camps on some plateaus, high above the water.

Aang was tired, but he didn't think he could sleep. Katara and Toph found him standing on an outcropping, staring out at the darkened water and sky.

"Are you sure he's okay?" Toph asked quietly.

"No. I'll talk to him," Katara said, before walking away from her, toward Aang. He didn't acknowledge her when she stood next to him.

Katara skipped the concerned questions and small talk; but she was still gentle. "You know, it's okay to miss Appa."

Aang didn't answer.

"What's going on with you?" Katara asked. "In the desert, all you cared about was finding Appa, and now it's like you don't care about him at all."

"You saw what I did out there," Aang said, sounding dejected. "I was so angry about losing Appa, I couldn't control myself. I hated feeling like that."

"But now you're not letting yourself feel anything." Katara looked at him with sympathy.

_"I don't care, do you hear me? I don't care!"_

_"I know sometimes it hurts to care. The more you care, the more you have to lose. And you've lost more than anyone should."_

In the back of her mind, Katara wondered if Zuko and Aang would ever realize how similar they could be.

Katara took a deep breath. When she spoke, her voice was gentle. "I know sometimes it hurts more to hope, and it hurts more to care. But you have to promise me that you won't stop caring."

Aang was silent. Katara stretched out her arms. "Come here. You need a hug," she coaxed.

But Aang just turned and bowed politely to her. "Thank you for your concern, Katara." Then he walked away, leaving Katara looking disappointed and a little hurt. He didn't notice Toph leaning against a wall of rock when he passed her.

Toph straightened up, and put a hand on Katara's arm as she passed her. "Let me handle this." She followed Aang toward the central camp. Katara watched the two youngest teammates, wondering if Toph could reason with Aang in a way that she couldn't. After all, Toph had done something right when he started earthbending.

"Aang," she began. "I think Katara's right."

"About what? Hope?"

"Maybe. But definitely about the way you're acting. You've got a whole crew of people who are here to help you, and you're pushing them—us—away."

"No I'm not. We're all working together, to get to Ba Sing Se."

Toph huffed, blowing her bangs out of her face. "Look, usually I get annoyed when people are overly emotional. But I think Katara's right—what you're trying to be is unnatural, especially for you. You're the fun and perky guy in the group."

"You haven't known me that long."

"I've known you long enough to know that this isn't you." Toph planted her hands on her hips. "Look, as your earthbending master, I'm telling you to shape up."

Aang rounded on her. "What do you want me to do? Pour out my emotions? Sit down and cry? Break down so I can't lead us out of here?"

"No, Aang—"

"Toph, there are times when I have no idea what I'm doing, but I still do everything I can to set things right. _That's_ what I need to focus on now."

Toph was silent for a moment, keeping her face blank. Then she turned away. "I'm sorry I asked." She started to walk away, but then spoke over her shoulder. "If you want to cry, there's a shoulder right here."

"That's not funny."

"It wasn't supposed to be," Toph said quietly. She sat down and bended a small earth tent around herself, signaling that she was done talking.

* * *

><p>They resumed traveling in the morning. They had only been walking for an hour or so when they faced their next obstacle.<p>

Toph couldn't see the water, but she could sense how the earth sloped downward before them, and deduced that it had gone under the surface.

Katara stepped forward resolutely. "Everyone, single file," she commanded. As they followed her, Toph could hear moving water, and knew that Katara was bending it up on either side, creating a passage for them.

"Aang, I need help," Katara said when they went below the surface level; the water closed above their heads.

Aang silently handed his staff to Toph, who took it without question. She guessed that she was the only one who didn't feel claustrophobic in the eerie air pocket. Momo left Toph's shoulder; when he returned a moment later he was wet, and chittering in fear.

"What is that thing?" Katara said. Toph felt uneasy, not being able to see what she was referring to.

Suddenly something crashed through the bubble. Katara screamed, and her breaking concentration threatened to bring the water crashing down on them. Reacting quickly, Toph bended the earth beneath them, a column of earth that brought them up to the surface.

They stood on a small island in the middle of the stretch of water. Toph handed the staff back to Aang. She could hear something slicing through the water, making frightening noises—like hissing.

Suddenly something _huge_ broke through the surface, sloshing water around, and screamed at the group—the sound was like a cross between a hiss and a bird cry.

"I think I just figured out why they call it the Serpent's Pass!" Sokka exclaimed. "Suki, you know about giant sea monsters. Make it go away!"

"Just because I live near the Unagi doesn't mean I'm an expert!" Suki snapped.

Aang swung his staff in an arc, sending a blast of wind that knocked the serpent backwards. "I'll distract him. Katara, get everyone across." He opened his glider and took off; the serpent's head followed him.

Katara froze a path of ice from Toph's island to the land of the pass. Then, while the others crossed over to safety, she bent an ice surfboard under her and propelled herself toward the serpent to help Aang fight.

Suki, Sokka, and Than's family had made it to the other side when they realized Toph was still behind them on the island. Sokka shouted back to her. "Toph, come on! It's just ice!"

Toph lowered one leg; her foot touched the ice—cold, unfeeling. She shrank back. "Actually, I'm going to stay on my little island where I can see."

Just then she felt the serpent's body crash on the land behind her, shaking the entire island. Toph yelped and moved onto the ice. "Okay, I'm coming!" She inched sideways, in the direction of her friends.

"You're doing great!" Sokka shouted encouragingly. "Just follow the sound of my voice!"

"It's hard to ignore!" Toph said acidly.

"You're almost there!"

She was just starting to gain some confidence, she heard and felt the ice before her break apart as the serpent crashed through it. Toph screamed as she fell into the water. "HELP! I can't swim!" She thrashed around in the water, willing herself to stay at the surface, but not knowing how.

"I'm coming, Toph!" Sokka shouted.

Toph started to sink in the water. Her head slipped beneath the surface; she couldn't breathe; she stopped thrashing her arms and legs.

After everything she had survived, how could she die from something as trivial and common as drowning? It didn't seem right.

At least drowning would be faster than dying of thirst or starvation or heat …

Suddenly two strong hands grabbed her, and she could feel herself rising up. Toph and her rescuer broke the surface; she coughed up water, leaning against the other person.

"Are you all right?" That wasn't Sokka. It was a girl—Suki.

"I'm okay." Toph tried not to sound disappointed. She coughed again, and cleared her throat. "Thanks for that."

"You're welcome." With that Suki started to kick her legs, bringing them back to the next part of the Pass.

Katara held on to the glider, and Aang flew them back to where the others were waiting. The group cheered when the two of them landed.

"Thanks for that, guys!" Sokka said encouragingly.

Katara smiled. Then she glanced at Toph and Suki. "Why are you guys all wet?"

"Well, while you were busy saving us, I nearly drowned," Toph informed them. "Did I ever mention that I can't swim?"

Aang blinked at her. "Oh." Of course, it made sense that Toph's parents wouldn't have though it safe or necessary for her to learn to swim.

"Are you okay?" Katara asked, bending the dripping water out of Toph's hair and clothes.

"I'm fine," Toph said. "Just wounded pride," she muttered, barely audible. Katara kneeled down and put her arms around her. Toph didn't protest; then she leaned into her.

Aang turned away from them, clenching his hand around his staff. He wished he'd been there to help Toph … but on the other hand, he'd been busy fighting the serpent, something he had to do to save his friends.

The thought reminded him of something, another thing to do with Toph … Hadn't she said that she couldn't save Appa because she'd been occupied with helping the rest of them?

But this was different. There had been other people to help Toph, so Aang hadn't really needed to be there for her.

Why didn't that make him feel any better?

His nagging conscience answered for him. _Because you have some idea of what it was like for her then._

* * *

><p>They had just reached sight of the wall when Ying realized the baby was coming. Sokka panicked; but Katara knew what to do and told each of them how to help. Even Toph obeyed willingly, feeling genuinely glad that someone could take charge of this situation. She was starting to admire that about Katara.<p>

The worst part was waiting. They couldn't travel without the others; they had to wait to get to the city itself.

"Can you tell what's going on in there?" Aang asked Toph as they sat outside the earth tent.

Toph grimaced. "Kind of … but you don't want to know."

"Do you wish you couldn't tell?"

Toph shrugged.

"If you don't mind me asking," Aang said, "do you think you'd want to go through with that?"

Toph snorted. "No one's ever asked me _that_ before … And honestly, I don't know that I'd make a good parent. I don't have the best examples to go by."

"I never knew my parents … but Monk Gyatso was my guardian, so I guess I could compare him to a father. Katara's been the closest thing I've had to a mother," he said, only half joking. Toph let out a short laugh.

Aang rested his arms on his legs. "Toph?"

"Yeah?"

He didn't look at her when he spoke. "I'm sorry I turned on you when we lost Appa. I just – I was angry, and I wanted someone to blame. But I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

Toph half-smiled. "S'okay. I guess that's partly my fault; I was the one who taught you to get angry at me," she said, remembering the first time Aang earthbended.

Aang blinked at her. "Is that what you think? Because I was already capable of anger; it's just not something I feel very often."

There was a pause. Then Toph spoke again. "You know, I never had a pet in my life. But for a while, my best friends were badgermoles. So I know what it's like to have a connection with an animal, especially one that was like a teacher to you."

Aang had never thought of that as something that they had in common. Yet it made sense: he valued life; her element was earth, which supported life.

"We're going to find Appa. I promise."

Just then Sokka came stumbling out of the earth tent, his skin pale and clammy. He pressed his back against the earthen wall and slid down. "You do _not_ want to go in there," he said flatly.

"Don't think it'll make much difference for me, but I'll take your word for it," Toph said ambivalently.

"Another thing," Aang said. "I'm sorry I didn't do anything when you were drowning."

"Oh … well, you were kind of busy, saving everyone."

"Still—I didn't stop to think—it never occurred to any of us that you couldn't move on ice, or swim in water."

Toph chuckled. "Pick your poison: death by fire, or death by ice?" Then her voice turned serious. "I _felt_ blind when we were in the desert, with all the sand, but this was worse. I felt helpless … just like my parents think I am."

Aang looked at her, and then turned his head to look out at the water behind them. He made a decision then. "One day, I'll teach you how to swim," Aang promised.

Toph was silent, for just a moment. "Sure. Good luck with that."

"I mean it. I'd do it right now, but I don't think we should go back in serpent-infested waters."

He was starting to think outside the box, almost like King Bumi. Other ideas occurred to him, things that he could teach Toph to do: fly a kite, maybe even read or write. That last idea reminded him of something.

"When we were in the library, I did find a book that I thought I could read to you," Aang remembered.

Toph smiled. "Thanks. I'd like that."

When they stopped conversing, they heard a sound that made their hearts leap: a baby's cry. Then Katara exclaimed, "It's a girl!"

Toph spoke to Sokka. "So, do you want to see the baby, or are you going to faint like an old lady again?"

"No, no; I'm good this time," Sokka said, getting to his feet. He followed Toph inside.

Ying was lying down, leaning back against the rock wall. She was taking slow, deep breaths, and holding a small bundle in her arms.

There was another, new heartbeat, so faint that Toph almost missed it. The baby.

She didn't think she should ask to hold it, when Ying probably wanted to do that right now, just after giving birth.

She felt Aang enter the earth tent, and take in the scene: everyone gathered around the newborn and its parents.

"She _sounds_ healthy," Toph remarked, listening to the baby coo.

"She's beautiful," Katara said softly.

"It's so … squishy-looking," Sokka said, almost ruining the moment.

There was a moment of silence, but it wasn't awkward; everyone was looking at the baby—except Toph, who was gauging the emotions of everyone around her. They were calm, and happy.

"What are we going to name her?" Than wondered.

"I want our daughter's name to be unique," Ying said. "I want it to _mean_ something." She sounded so loving.

Toph couldn't help wondering. Had her parents been this happy when she was born? For the first time she wondered how they might have felt when they realized she was blind. Had they recognized it right away, when she first opened her sightless eyes? Or had they realized it over time, when she never responded to what she saw?

Aang spoke up quietly. "I've been going through a hard time lately," he said, addressing the small family. "But you've made me … hopeful, again."

There was a very short pause. Then Ying said, with more confidence than any of them had heard from her before, "I know what I want to name our baby now. Hope."

"That's a perfect name," Than agreed. "Hope."

* * *

><p>A short while later, Toph followed Aang outside. "Did the monks ever give you that sense of family?"<p>

"Not quite like that—with two parents and a child."

Toph kicked at the dirt. "So, do you think you'd be okay having that kind of family? I mean, as opposed to a monastic society."

"Yeah. Actually, I think I want that. One day."

Katara came out of the earth tent. Aang turned to look at her. "Katara?"

She stood and looked at him. Aang bowed his head slightly. "You were both right. I thought I was being strong, but really I was just running away from my feelings."

Katara could understand that. She had done the same thing, after leaving Zuko's ship.

"Seeing this family together, so full of happiness and love … It reminded me of how I feel about Appa." He paused, choosing his words carefully. "And how I feel about you guys."

Tears streamed down Katara's smiling face. She wiped them away. Then she and Aang both stepped forward and hugged each other.

"Aw, you guys are sweet," Toph said mockingly. Then she turned her head sideways and spat on the ground.

Aang laughed and let go of Katara, only to extend a hand toward Toph. "Come here."

Toph pretended to consider, then came over and hugged Aang. It was the first time they actually embraced. She was just a bit shorter than Aang, who was more used to hugging the taller Katara and Sokka.

But Toph didn't let go. She couldn't remember the last time she had held anyone so close. With the possible exception of her parents when she was an infant, she had never felt, and thereby looked at, someone so closely before. Aang stiffened in slight surprise as her right hand came to rest over his chest. She could always feel his pulse through the earth, but now, under her grimy hand, she could feel his heart pumping blood through his whole body.

At a time like this, who needed eyes that could see? She could see him quite well enough.

"Toph? What are you …"

She grinned and stood on tiptoe to whisper almost teasingly in his ear. "Just getting a good look at you." Then she walked away. Katara had to stifle a laugh when he saw Aang's bemused but strangely happy and hopeful expression.

A short distance away, Suki approached Sokka, who was kneeling down as he packed his bag. "Sokka, it's been great seeing you," she began.

Sokka stood up, looking at her in surprise. "Whoa. Why does it sound like you're saying good-bye?" Without realizing it, he had gotten used to the idea that she would be a part of their group. Why had she chosen to come with them if she wasn't going to stay in Ba Sing Se?

"I came along because I wanted to make sure you got through the Serpent's Pass safely. But now I need to get back to the other Kyoshi Warriors."

Sokka was stunned. "So, you came along … to protect _me_?" Sokka remembered how Suki had dove in to save Toph before he did. Had she done that so he wouldn't have to risk his life? Or because she knew he didn't want to lose anyone else?

"Listen, I—I'm really sorry about last night." She looked askance, remembering. Last night had been the first time they actually sat down and talked, instead of fighting or training or traveling with each other. "We were talking, and … saying things …" Suki closed her eyes, embarrassed. "I just got carried away and before I knew it I …" She was cut off by Sokka's lips made contact with hers, catching her by surprise.

Sokka pulled away, looking into her eyes. "You talk too much," he said simply. Then he kissed her again, and she responded, sliding her arms around his neck. Suki hadn't realized just how much the Water Tribe warrior meant to her.

After a minute they both pulled away. Now Suki felt reluctant to leave.

"Will I ever see you again?" she asked, wondering aloud.

"I think so," Sokka said thoughtfully. "Things have a way of turning up again, even when you aren't looking for them." He was thinking of Katara's necklace, the one she had lost and found, which Pakku had made and rediscovered after sixty years. "I'm like Boomerang here: I'll come back, even if you don't expect it."

That gave Suki hope. "Come and get me," she said softly, cupping his cheek in her hand. She kissed him on the cheek, the way she had the first time they said good-bye; then she turned around to start the journey back. She didn't cry; one of the things Sokka liked about her was that she was rarely emotional.

Sokka sighed, smiling infatuatedly as he watched her form become smaller in the distance.

* * *

><p><strong>Song:<strong> "The Long and Winding Road" by The Beatles

**Artwork:** "Suki and Sokka" by AnywhereButReality on DeviantArt

**Author's Note:** I'd just like to say, I got the idea for the hug from the story "See What I See" by Geth Therapist (formerly Cadmos), who is on my Favorite Authors list. Also, I actually wrote a oneshot, "Footsteps in the Sand," in which Aang uses earthbending to teach Toph how to read. (I can't say yet whether it can be considered to be connected to this story.)

Today is my last day of summer vacation. Between school and work, I'm going to have more limited time for fan fiction, but I'll still try to update fairly often. I'm almost done with "Beauty and the Blue Spirit" and "Mutual Support"; once I finish those, I'm going to start my first multi-chapter story for _The Legend of Korra_.


	30. The Girls in Ba Sing Se

_Published September 15, 2012_

Let us say in passing, to be blind and to be loved, is in fact – on this earth where nothing is complete – one of the most strangely exquisite forms of happiness. … The supreme happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves – say rather, loved in spite of ourselves; this conviction the blind have. In their calamity, to be served is to be caressed. Are they deprived of anything? No. Light is not lost where love enters. And what a love! A love wholly founded in purity. There is no blindness where there is certainty. The soul gropes in search of a soul, and finds it. ~ Victor Hugo, _Les Misérables_

* * *

><p>Aang flew ahead on his glider, intent on finding Appa, while the rest of the group went to the wall on foot. But then, Aang surprised them by flying back to meet them.<p>

"Aang, what are you doing here?" Katara asked. "I thought you were looking for Appa?"

"I was, but something stopped me," Aang said grimly. "Something big."

When they reached the base of the wall, Aang and Toph worked together to earthbend a platform up the face of the wall. "Now, what's so big that Appa has to wait?" Sokka asked.

"That." There was a shocked silence. Toph felt slightly annoyed, not being able to see what they were talking about.

They reached the top of the wall and stepped off the platform. "Remember," Aang said to his friends, "Suki said the Fire Nation was working on something on the other side of the lake—something they didn't want anyone to see. That must be it."

"What _is_ it?" Toph demanded.

Sokka answered, "It's a huge metal Fire Nation machine—the end looks like a drill. It's going to try to break through the Wall."

"We made it to Ba Sing Se, and we're still not safe," Ying said despairingly. "No one is."

"What are you people doing here?" An earthbender guard was yelling at them. "Civilians aren't allowed on the wall."

Aang faced him, looking determined. "I'm the Avatar. Take me to whoever's in charge."

While Than and his family were shown the way to the train station, a guard led the teenagers through the barracks. As they walked, Toph spoke up. "This might be a stupid question, but as an earthbender, I'm curious. What is metal made of?"

Sokka, the technical mind of the group, tried to explain. "Metal is a natural resource. It's found in mines, in caves or underground."

The guard brought them to the desk where a middle-aged man in a decorated uniform sat, perfectly at ease. "General Sung," the guard said, "this is the Avatar and his friends."

"It is an honor to welcome you to the Outer Wall young Avatar," Sung said with a pleasant smile, "but your help is not needed."

"Not needed?" Aang repeated.

"_Not_ needed," Sung said smugly. "I have the situation under control. I assure you the Fire Nation cannot penetrate this wall. Many have tried to break through it, but none have succeeded."

Katara was secretly glad when Toph made a point of mentioning General Iroh, though she didn't like to think about the kind old man leading a Fire Nation attack. "What about the Dragon of the West? He got in."

General Sung was startled. "Well, uh, technically yes. But he was quickly expunged." Katara and Toph both looked displeased at that word.

They watched from the wall, with General Sung looking through a telescope, as the Terra Team attempted to halt the drill with earthbending. They could see the men fall, taken out one by one.

General Sung drew his eyes away from the telescope, looking horrified. "We're _doomed!_" he exclaimed in panic.

Sokka slapped the man in the face. "Get a hold of yourself, man!"

Sung rubbed his cheek sheepishly. "You're right, I'm sorry."

"Maybe you'd like the Avatar's help now?" Toph said pointedly.

Sung meekly went up to Aang. "Yes, please," he said timidly.

* * *

><p>An hour later, Sokka had come up with a plan. And the ironic part was, one of the Fire Nation girls, Ty Lee, had inspired it. They were going to take down the drill from the inside.<p>

Toph led the way from the wall to the drill, creating a dust cloud to keep them out of sight. Then she earthbent a tunnel to get the four of them under the drill.

"There!" Sokka pointed upwards to an opening in the drill's body. Aang leapt up and grabbed onto a length of pipe; then he gave Katara and Sokka a boost up. But Toph stayed put on the ground.

Sokka poked his head out, upside-down, to look at her. "Toph, come on!"

"No way am I going in that metal monster. I can't bend in there." She pointed to the area around them. "I'll try to slow it down out here."

Sokka didn't argue. "Okay, good luck." He disappeared into the drill.

"Be careful," Aang said; it was all he could think to say, before he left her behind.

The last time they had left Toph on her own, she had lost Appa. Aang could only hope that she would be all right now.

Toph tried bending a slanted pillar of earth up to the bottom of the drill. She could feel the metal machine pushing against it, forcing the earth forward; she braced her hands against it, straining against the force.

She stayed like that for a while, until she allowed herself to pull away for a minute. She was using up all her energy, and even then she could tell she was only slowing down the machine, not stopping it. All she could do was buy time for her friends to work inside.

Toph knelt down next to the wall of the drill. She would only let herself rest if she used the chance to get a feel for the machine. She pressed her hand against the metal; she could feel it moving slowly forward under her palm. It vibrated, probably because of some kind of engine inside.

Keeping one hand on the metal, Toph planted her other hand on the ground, trying to compare the two substances.

She didn't understand how something that came from the earth wouldn't be made of earth.

The bendable elements were things that emulated life.

Sometimes metal could move like a living thing.

Toph didn't have time to meditate on what existed and what should be possible. She stood up and bent another column of earth against the drill's body, trying to slow its progress.

"Come _on_, Twinkletoes," Toph said through gritted teeth. "Hurry up."

* * *

><p>Once Sokka stole the schematics and devised a plan, Aang and Katara worked as quickly as they could, first to cut through a brace, and then to weaken the rest.<p>

"Good work, Team Avatar!" Sokka praised. "Now Aang just has to—_duck!_" He bent over, just avoiding contact with a blast of blue fire.

"Whoa!" Aang just barely avoided another blast.

The three Fire Nation girls stood on an upper girder, looking down on them. Now Katara knew their names: Ty Lee, Azula, and Mai.

Ty Lee looked excited. "Wow, Azula, you were right! It _is_ the Avatar."

Katara put her hands on her hips. "So, you're Prince Zuko's sister," she remarked, looking at the firebender in the middle. "I've heard about you. None of it was very flattering." When she finished, she had to duck to avoid the blue fire Azula blasted toward her.

Aang and the siblings ran down to an intersecting hallway. "You guys get out of here," Aang said, gesturing to the left. "I know what to do." He headed down the hallway to the right.

Sokka found an escape route through the slurry pipe, which led rock broken from the wall to the other end of the drill. It had to be the most disgusting thing Katara had ever done; for Sokka it was second only to sucking on a frozen frog. They landed outside at the end of the drill, in a mess of slurry.

Ty Lee came riding out in the flow of slurry, looking wicked and somehow full of anticipation. But before she reached the ground, Katara got to her feet and bent the water in the slurry, sending it back up into the terminus of the pipe.

"Try blocking my chi now, circus freak!" Katara shouted fiercely. Ty Lee couldn't move against the contradicting currents.

"Katara, keep that up!" Sokka instructed. "The pressure will build up in the drill, then when Aang delivers the final blow, it will be ready to pop!"

Katara stood resolutely, concentrating on keeping the slurry from falling out of the drill. Again, since he could do nothing to help, Sokka tried to shout encouragement. "Good technique little sister! Keep it up! Don't forget to breathe!"

At this, Katara just about lost her temper. "You know, I am just about sick and tired of you telling me what to do all day. You're like a chattering hog-monkey!"

Sokka screamed at her. "Just bend the slurry, woman!"

With her free hand, Katara bent a rush of slurry onto Sokka, causing him to fall down again.

"You guys need some help?" Toph emerged from under the drill.

"Toph! Help me plug up this drain," Katara said.

Toph planted her feet firmly on the ground, and took up a stance similar to Katara's. Since the slurry was really water mixed with dirt, it was something that both of them could bend. Together they forced it back into the metal structure.

"Where's Aang?" Toph shouted.

"He's delivering the final blow, at the top of the drill!"

This was the first time when Aang's earthbending might be put to the test. _Remember what I've taught you,_ Toph thought sternly, as though Aang could hear her thoughts.

"Here it comes!" Toph bended a pillar of rock to lift herself and the Water Tribe siblings up, as the slurry erupted from all compartments of the drill and rushed past them like a tsunami. From their high vantage point, they could see each metal segment sink to the ground, as though in defeat.

"We won," Sokka said with satisfaction.

Toph opened a hole in the ground, and bent a tunnel through which they bypassed the drill and made it back to the wall. They found Aang and Momo there, covered in slurry like them. "Hey guys," he said, cheerful despite being so tired.

Toph punched him in the arm. "Way to go, Twinkletoes!"

Aang beamed, feeling proud of himself and his teammates. "Thanks. But, you're the one who taught me to break an opponent's stance."

"Well." Toph folded her arms, looking pleased. "You've made me proud, Pupil Aang."

They spent the night in the barracks, and took the earthbent train into the city in the morning.

"I can't believe we finally made it to Ba Sing Se in one piece," Katara said, sounding both awed and relieved.

"Hey, don't jinx it!" Sokka exclaimed. "We could still be attacked by some giant, exploding Fire Nation spoon. Or find out the city's been submerged in an ocean full of killer shrimp."

"You been hitting the cactus juice again?" Toph asked skeptically.

"I'm just saying, weird stuff happens to us."

* * *

><p>"I want our new place to look nice—in case someone brings home a lady friend," Iroh said sweetly, nudging Zuko with his elbow.<p>

Zuko knew it was silly of him to think of Katara when Iroh said that. As Iroh seemed to be suggesting, there were other girls, like that Song. She was a healer, like Katara. If he were still in the Fire Nation, he might have been with Mai. But Zuko didn't feel any desire for romance or love, or any attachment that would tie him down to this city.

Zuko was much less enthusiastic about their new "home". It would be his first permanent home in a long time. It wasn't his ship at open sea. It wasn't the vast Earth Kingdom farmland and desert. And yet this metropolis didn't make him happy either. He knew in the back of his mind what place would satisfy him: his home in the Fire Nation. He didn't understand how Iroh could adapt so easily to any situation.

Zuko looked around at the walls that cut off the lower-class neighborhood from the rest of the city. The great wall of Ba Sing Se had kept the Fire Nation out for centuries; but now that he was on the inside, he felt trapped, like a bumble-fly that entered an artificial hive through a cone-shaped tunnel: you could squeeze through to get in, but you couldn't get back out.

"This city is a prison," Zuko said flatly. He was more right than he realized. "I don't want to make a life here."

Iroh's response was predictably optimistic. "Life happens wherever you are, whether you make it or not. Now come on, I found us some new jobs, and we start _this_ afternoon."

* * *

><p>Contacting the Earth King was proving much harder than any of them had anticipated. According to their designated guide, Joo Dee, protocol wouldn't allow them to simply go to the palace to have an audience with him.<p>

Katara had the idea of sneaking into a party. Toph said from the start that it wouldn't work, but somehow Katara convinced her that they could pass for the elite of Ba Sing Se. The girls spent the entirety of their second day in the city shopping for clothes and makeup, of the kind Toph knew her mother had worn to parties back in Gaoling.

After spending two hours locked in their bedroom, the girls emerged and showed themselves to the boys in the living room.

"Wow, you look beautiful," Aang said. Toph felt secretly pleased hearing how awed he sounded. "Beautiful" was not something anyone had called her before, not even her mother. She couldn't understand what it meant in a visual sense; but she knew it was a good thing, and the awe and respect in Aang's voice seemed to prove it.

Katara started to thank him, but Toph silenced her by placing a fan in front of her mouth. "Don't talk to the commoners, Katara. First rule of society."

Aang was reminded of how Toph had acted when he saw her at the Bei Fong estate. She could act pretty snobby, even arrogant, if she tried.

"We'll get in the party, and then find a way to let you in through the side gate," Katara told the boys.

But of course it wouldn't go that simply. None of their plans did.

They weren't sure exactly what happened, or how it happened. They all made it into the party, but the Earth King left as soon as he arrived. The Dai Li forced the teammates aside, into an office that apparently belonged to the man whom Katara and Toph had tricked—or _thought_ they'd tricked—into letting them inside. Locked in the library, Long Feng gave them something of a lecture on why the king couldn't be bothered with hearing their plans for the war effort.

They could see glimmers of the truth through Long Feng's words. The Earth King was a figurehead, a symbol. The real power, over such resources as the military, was in the hands of Long Feng. He actually spoke of Ba Sing Se's peace and order with something like conviction.

Toph realized something almost shocking: They valued peace and order over truth and freedom.

Rules and manners she understood, but she knew nothing about politics. On the other hand, she did understand greed and lies and façades. This Long Feng person had all three.

They were escorted back to their apartment, again by a woman who called herself Joo Dee, but it was not the same person whom they had seen earlier. They only had the same vacant, eerie smile and fake air of cheerfulness.

"This," Sokka said when the four of them were finally alone, "is by far the creepiest place we've ever been to. Not counting the Swamp," he added quickly.

Aang fell onto his knees, and then flopped down forward onto the cushions. "Are you okay?" Katara asked, looking at him with concern.

"No." Aang's answer was truthful. "I'm not okay. I don't know what to do," he said hopelessly

"We need to think," Sokka said, taking a seat on one of the cushions.

"I think I figured out why General Sung said you weren't needed here," Toph said in a low voice. "He didn't want you to get involved with Ba Sing Se's military, and find out what we know now—that everyone here doesn't know about the war. He only asked for our help when he saw he couldn't keep the Fire Nation out himself."

"And _he_ must have told Joo Dee, or whoever sent her, that we were here," Katara realized.

"Now the question is, what are we going to do about this?" Sokka said. "We only have a few months before the solar eclipse, and then Sozin's Comet."

"We can't give up looking for Appa," Aang said, sounding determined again. "And Long Feng seemed to hint that he knew something about it."

"We can't do anything too risky. You heard what he said—_We'll be watching_," Katara mimicked, raising her arms in a pantomime of a monster.

"Don't forget, in our free time, you still have earthbending training," Toph reminded Aang.

Sokka stroked his chin. "We need to learn more about the city. Scope it out, see what it's really like, learn as much as we can about the Earth King and the Dai Li."

"Joo Dee—or someone claiming to be her—will probably insist on accompanying us," Katara pointed out.

Sokka grinned with something reminiscent of King Bumi's wicked genius. "We'll split up, so she can't be with all of us at once. If the Dai Li watch us, we'll see how thin they can be spread, figure out what our boundaries are."

Toph smirked. "This Long Feng guy doesn't know _who_ he's dealing with."

* * *

><p>The Girls' Day Out turned out to be more enjoyable than Toph had expected. The only downside came at the end, when some girls made fun of their makeovers. It was Toph who first retaliated with bending, and for once Katara didn't scold her; in fact she helped by waterbending.<p>

"Those girls don't know what they're talking about," Katara said as they walked back to the apartment.

"It's okay," Toph said. "One of the good things about being blind is that I don't have to waste time worrying about appearances. I don't care what I look like. I'm not looking for anyone's approval. I know who I am."

They stopped walking. "That's what I really admire about you, Toph," Katara said seriously. "You're so strong and confident and self-assured. And I know it doesn't matter, but … you're really pretty."

Toph smiled in surprise. "I am?"

"Yeah. You are."

They started walking again, both of them feeling happier. "I'd return the compliment," Toph said, "but I have no idea what you look like." They laughed, and Toph gave her a playful punch on the arm. "Thanks, Katara."

A few minutes later they made it back to the apartment. Sokka and Aang were playing a card game in the living room. Both of them did a double take when they saw the girls.

"What do you think?" Katara said with a small smile; she didn't grin, for fear of smudging her makeup.

"You want my honest opinion?" Sokka cautioned. "You look like what's-her-name, the circus girl."

"Ty Lee?" Katara frowned. "Wait – you think we look like clowns?"

Toph plopped down on a cushion beside Aang. "She did it. She actually made me feel like a girl." Her tone was flat, neither proud nor apologetic.

Aang blinked at her. "You don't … I mean, you were a girl all along."

"Yeah, but caring about makeup … I just don't want to be alienated from you and Sokka. Y'know?"

"I guess …"

"Hey, Sokka," Katara interjected, "you've worn makeup before."

"You mean warrior paint? That's part of our culture!"

"No; I was referring to the time you wore a dress."

Sokka blanched. Toph hooted. "No way! For real?"

"It was when I met Suki!" Sokka blurted. "I wanted to train with her, and she said I'd have to follow the Kyoshi Warrior traditions—she tricked me into it!"

"And you let her," Katara said smugly.

Toph folded her arms. "I think it's sweet that Sokka wore a dress and put on makeup to please a girl," she said with a tone of finality.

"Hmph!" Sokka slammed his solitaire tile on the table, stood up and stormed out of the room. Katara just smiled to herself, and went to the kitchen area to get started on dinner. Aang and Toph were left alone in the main room.

Toph brought a hand to her face, feeling her cheek. She could feel some of the powder and cream rub onto her fingers. "Be honest," she said to Aang. "Is it too much?"

"Well … I've never seen your face so colorful." Aang stopped, realizing that probably made no sense to her.

Toph lowered her voice. "Can you help me get it off? I'd ask Katara, but that might hurt her feelings …"

"Sure." Aang got a bowl of water and a piece of cloth from the washroom and handed them to Toph. She dipped the cloth into the water and gently rubbed it across her face, first smearing the makeup, then wiping it off.

"Is it all gone?"

"There's still some on your cheek. Do you want me to …?"

"… Sure." Toph held out the cloth; Aang took it and carefully wiped the remaining makeup off her face.

"There. All gone."

"Thanks." Toph could smile widely, without worrying about cracking or smudging foundation. "I feel more like myself now … But don't tell Katara I said that."

"'Course not." Aang leaned back against the pillows on the floor, his arms folded behind his head.

Toph rested her arms on her knees. "Hey, Aang?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I'm pretty?"

It was probably the last thing Aang had ever expected Toph to ask. "What—where is this coming from?"

"Katara told me that she thinks I'm pretty. I want to know if that's just her, or if other people think that."

Aang sat up and studied her thoughtfully. "Does it really matter to you?"

Toph struggled internally for a moment. "Yeah," she said finally, sounding almost defeated. "Maybe it's vain, but I'm also curious. And a little confused about the point of makeup. Do I need it to look good?"

"No," Aang said at once. "I mean—" He paused, blushing a little. He felt flustered, not wanting to hurt or embarrass Toph when she wanted his honest opinion.

He studied her, for a minute. There had been times when he'd thought that she was good-looking. And now, her bangs were parted to the sides, giving him a full view of her face.

"You look really nice when you smile," Aang said truthfully. "And when you're laughing. Your eyes are nice, too." He had never seen her eyes flicker around a room or stare at him as though searching his soul; and yet, though sightless, her eyes weren't blank. They could still cry tears, and they could light up in joy.

"Could you take your hair out?"

Toph blinked, and Aang was about to tell her to forget it, when she reached up and pulled her headband out. Her hair was clean, having just been washed at the spa; it tumbled down, not like waves, but more like a stream.

"Wow." Her face was the same, only instead of being framed by the headband, there was a curtain of hair around it. Aang reached out and pushed some of Toph's bangs to the side so he could see her face.

Toph felt self-conscious (an unusual feeling for her), and a little nervous when his fingers brushed her face. "Well?"

"You are pretty." Aang sounded as though he was just discovering this himself.

Toph blushed a little, but she was pleased nonetheless. "Thanks, Aang." She flipped her hair over her shoulder. "It feels weird, having it down. My parents made me wear it in a bun when I was little, so I wouldn't try to chew on it. Now I just try to keep it out of the way while I'm earthbending." She paused. "Aang?"

"Yeah Toph?"

She sounded uncharacteristically shy. "Would you mind if I took a look at you?"

"Not at all," Aang replied cheerfully.

He kept still as Toph crawled over, kneeled before him, and brought her hands to his face. Her fingers—for once not dusty or grimy with dirt—traced his features. Toph could vaguely remember feeling her parents' faces this way, when she was small enough to sit on their laps.

"So, what do I look like?" Aang said casually.

Toph grinned, and there was something both wicked and friendly in her eyes. "Well, you're bald. You have big ears. You smile a lot. And you're this tall." She laid her hand on the top of his head.

Sokka had returned, and leaned against the doorframe of the boys' bedroom. "I guess you can't feel the tattoos?" he said, ruining the intimate moment.

Toph arched her eyebrows dubiously, unsure whether he was messing with her. "It's true," Aang informed her, guiding her hand to his forehead. "It's five connected arrows, on my hands, feet, and forehead."

Toph looked impressed. "I had no idea. Covered with tattoos … no wonder you fit in at the Earth Rumble. Guess you're not as much of a sissy as I thought."

"… Thanks, I think."

Katara came over from the kitchen are, and smiled when she saw Toph. "Hey, your hair looks nice when it's down. And there are so many things you could do with it … do you want me to put it in braids?"

Toph snorted. "_For_get it." She stood and walked away.

Katara blinked, and then glanced at Aang and Sokka. "Did I say something?"

Sokka shrugged. Aang just smiled, almost knowingly.

* * *

><p>The apartment had two small bedrooms, one for the boys and another for the girls. It felt a little strange to Katara, sleeping without Sokka and Aang (though she had done it before, for a time), but Toph wasn't a bad roommate. Sometimes they stayed up, conversing like good friends.<p>

Toph could tell from Katara's breathing and heart rate that she was still awake. "Hey, Katara?"

"Yeah Toph?"

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"Uh, I guess so."

Toph turned on her side so that she was facing Katara, so she wouldn't have to speak as loudly to be heard. "When did you realize that you were falling in love? And what did it feel like?"

Katara was more than a little caught off guard. That _was_ a personal question. She wasn't even sure she knew the answer.

She remembered Toph asking questions after they visited Zuko and an injured Iroh. She knew it was normal for a growing kid or teenager to wonder about these things … and she was the only girl Toph could ask.

Katara sighed deeply, trying to remember her time spent on the ship, time spent with Zuko. "It was gradual … and then kind of sudden. I guess … it was when I realized that I cared about him, not just because he was a person, but because he was _that_ person. Do you know what I mean?"

"I … think so."

"You have to keep in mind, it was a very weird situation, for Zuko and me. I couldn't love him until I trusted him enough to not be afraid of him. Then, I realized that I loved him when I felt like I would rather put myself in danger than let him get hurt."

Toph thought that made sense. She would do that for Aang in a heartbeat; but then, she would also do that for Sokka, or even Katara.

"What if I feel that way about a bunch of people I love? How can I distinguish …"

"Between that one special person?" Katara finished, half joking, and half shrewd. "I think … when you love someone that way, you kind of decide to make him precious to you. You know all about him, and yet he's a mystery to you, so you always want more time with him."

Toph thought about that. Part of the reason she liked Aang was that he knew all about her. But she didn't know all about him. He was interesting, that way.

"Is there a reason behind your curiosity?" Katara asked slyly.

Toph snorted. "'Course not. I just want to know … for future reference." She rolled over, turning her back to Katara, signaling that the conversation was over. But she didn't sleep for some time. New thoughts kept entering her head—ideas that she had never really considered—all of them having to do with Aang.

_Is this what it's like to have a crush on someone?_

_Can Aang tell? Does he feel anything like this?_

_What about the fact that I'm his teacher? We can't have both those dynamics at once, it would get too messy._

_ Besides, how would he react if I acted girly all the time? It would be weird, for both of us. We might not have as much fun together._

_ Suppose we did become a couple. What would change? Would we be able to just hang out like normal people? Could we still work as teammates? There is a war going on …_

Toph sighed, and dared to answer only two questions to herself. Yes, she might have a crush on Aang. No, she wasn't going to do anything about it … at least not anything big.

_"Y__ou shouldn't give one hundred percent of your energy into any one strike."_

Toph was an earthbender. She would wait, and listen, before taking any decisive action.

* * *

><p>Iroh tried to appear busy, not as though he had been curiously waiting for Zuko's return. He glanced over his shoulder when the dressed-up teenager came back to the apartment.<p>

"How was your night, Prince Zuko?" That was his real name, something he hadn't heard for a while.

Zuko walked past him to his bedroom, closing the sliding doors forcefully behind him. Iroh was surprised, but patiently turned back to the plants in his window box.

Then the door opened a crack, and Zuko looked out at him. "It was nice," he said, his tone unreadable. Then he closed the door, putting up a barrier between the two of them. He didn't want to answer Iroh's questions about the details of the night; he needed to be alone with his thoughts.

Zuko sighed, lying down on the bed. He did feel a little bad about leaving his date so suddenly. He couldn't have explained it to her without risking blowing his cover. Part of him felt embarrassed; another part hoped that he hadn't hurt her feelings.

Jin was nice—kind of sweet, actually—but everything had happened so quickly, it hadn't felt _real_. She had asked him out on a whim. She had probably kissed him to thank him.

He had started to kiss her back, before he stopped to think. That gesture had stirred up something in him—desire, perhaps. But part of him thought that might have been old feelings he was remembering, rather than new ones being experienced.

Strangely, Zuko found himself thinking not only of Katara, but also of Mai. She was one of the things he missed from the Fire Nation. Did she miss him while he was away? Would she and Katara ever meet, since they were respectively allied with Azula and the Avatar?

Would he ever see any of them again?

It seemed possible, even probable. It felt almost too easy, being able to escape into Ba Sing Se. Could they really avoid all their old enemies (and friends) by staying here?

Zuko's date with Jin made him realize something: He could never have an entirely normal life here, because his past would always isolate him; he would always be deceiving the people he met; and if he risked sharing his secret with them – either they would shun him, or betray him, or choose to carry the burden in their hearts.

In fact, part of Katara's appeal was that she knew the truth about who he was. She knew pretty much every side of him—except how he'd been in the Fire Nation. Only Mai knew that Zuko, and he couldn't be sure that person still existed.

He didn't belong here. True, he might better appreciate the Earth Kingdom now, but he still didn't feel at home. He wanted to be part of the Fire Nation.

By settling in Ba Sing Se, he felt like he was giving up.

_"Never give up without a fight_._"_

When had he stopped fighting? He had never stopped fighting to survive. But that was all he'd been fighting for lately.

He didn't want to disappear, like his mother, fate unknown, life forgotten. There had to be more to life—more to _his_ life—than this.


	31. Victory

_Published October 1, 2012_

No, old man, you have not hurt these people if they are of good conscience. But you must understand, sir, that a person is either with this court or he must be counted against it, there be no road in between. This is a sharp time, now, a precise time—we live no longer in the dusky afternoon when evil mixed itself with good and befuddled the world. Now, by God's grace, the shining sun is up, and them that fear not light will surely praise it. ~ Arthur Miller, _The Crucible_

* * *

><p>It took a few weeks and several discreet scouting missions to find a printer who would make "Lost Appa" posters and leaflets. They paid him a good portion of the money Toph had brought with her when she left home. Aang then spent the morning flying over the city, dropping leaflets wherever he went.<p>

Katara wasn't particularly surprised that Joo Dee warned them to stop, now that they had started taking more decisive action. Only Toph felt satisfied with Aang's furious reaction, which was to blatantly yell at the woman and slam the door in her face.

"That might come back to bite us in the blubber," Sokka said thoughtfully.

"I don't care," Aang said fiercely, still glaring at the door. "From now on we do whatever it takes to find Appa."

"Yeah!" Toph cheered, raising her arms in the air. "Let's break some rules!" And with that, she turned and knocked down the left wall with earthbending. It wasn't really necessary, but it felt good.

They split up to put up the posters, but stayed within a few blocks of each other. Toph reluctantly went with Sokka, since she couldn't see the posters they put up. Aang continued flying with his glider and dropping leaflets all around.

Katara was affixing a poster to a stone structure in front of a running stream, when she heard someone call out. "Hey, Water Tribe."

Katara turned around. Across the square she saw a tall, dark boy, just a few years older than her. He looked at her, and then at the poster she had just put up. "You're with the Avatar?"

"Yeah," Katara said cautiously. "Why?"

She couldn't quite read his expression; he seemed to be studying her, as much as she was him. "Do you have kin named Sokka?"

Katara was shocked. "How did you know that?"

"I met him, once. Avatar Aang, too." The boy came up to her and extended a hand. "My name's Jet."

Katara looked at him with suspicion. There had only been one period of time when the boys had traveled without her, and they had told her about everything that had happened to them during that time. "I've been traveling with Sokka and Aang for months, and they never mentioned you."

"They said some Fire Nation soldiers had captured you, not long before they stayed with us."

"'Us'?"

"Me and my Freedom Fighters. … They didn't come with me, here."

Katara studied him. Then she spotted her friends coming up a street leading into the square. She waved to them. "Guys!"

Sokka quickened his pace. "Katara, what is it?"

She moved past Jet to meet her friends. "Sokka, Aang. Do you know this guy?" Jet turned slowly to face the others.

Sokka took one look at the boy. He couldn't have been more startled if someone had slapped him in the face. "You!" Even Aang looked alarmed, and held up his staff in a defensive stance.

"What's going on?" Toph asked. "Who is this guy?"

"How come _I_ don't know who he is?" Katara said peevishly.

"We met him when Zuko was holding you prisoner," Aang explained.

"He's a liar—and a terrorist," Sokka asserted. Katara and Toph looked mildly bewildered.

"Sokka, I've changed!" Jet insisted.

The Water Tribe warrior gave him a dubious look. _Really?_

"I'm here to help you find Appa." Jet pulled something out from behind his back; Sokka started to reach for his boomerang, apparently thinking the boy was about to draw a weapon, but then Jet unfurled the paper item: one of the leaflets Aang had dropped.

Aang looked at the leaflet, and then at the boy standing before them. Then he turned to his friends, a serious expression on his face. "We have to give him a chance."

"I swear, I've changed," Jet said earnestly. "I was a troubled person, and I let my anger get out of control. But I don't even have the gang anymore. I've put all that behind me."

Sokka folded his arms, looking at him with a neutral expression. He knew how important it was—to all of them, but especially to Aang—for them to find Appa.

"What are you thinking?" Katara asked.

"Whether or not I'm an idiot for thinking he might be telling the truth," Sokka said.

Toph knelt down and placed her palm against the ground. "He's not lying," she said with certainty.

"How can you tell?" Katara asked.

"I can feel his breathing and heartbeat. When people lie, there is a physical reaction." She stood up. "He's telling the truth."

"We don't have any leads," Aang said. "If Jet says he can take us to Appa, we have to check it out."

"Alright," Sokka said finally. He shot Jet a warning look. "Just don't make us regret this."

"I won't," Jet promised. "I heard some guys talking about a big animal being kept in a warehouse. I can show you." Jet started to walk away, and the others followed him.

Katara kept stealing glances at Jet, wondering what he could have done to make Sokka and Aang so wary of him. She tried talking to him on the way to and from the place he'd heard about.

"So … you said you and your friends were freedom fighters?" Katara said conversationally.

"Yeah. We'd all lost homes or families to the Fire Nation. So we did everything we could to mess with their troops in the Earth Kingdom."

Katara frowned, looking at him with uncertainty. "Did that include terrorism?"

"Does terrorism mean sabotage? Or attacking a Fire Nation camp? Or trying to liberate an occupied town?"

Those sounded like rhetorical questions. Katara glanced away, and then back at him. "I'm afraid to ask …"

Jet looked down at the ground as he answered the unspoken question. "The Fire Nation killed my parents. I was only eight years old. That day changed my life forever."

Katara bowed her head. "Sokka and I lost our mother to the Fire Nation," she said quietly. She was familiar with the type of pain Jet must have felt; but she'd still had her father, brother, and grandmother to love and look after her.

"I'm so sorry, Katara," Jet said.

"Jet!" Sokka pushed in between the two of them; his eyes were as sharp as Jet's hook swords as he looked at the older boy. "Steer clear of my little sister."

Jet looked taken aback. Katara blinked at him. "Sokka!"

He pulled her back, behind Aang and Toph as they followed Jet. "Look, don't fall for the sob story, okay?"

"I was just talking to him!"

"Listen. His idea of 'liberating' a town was to flood it so everyone—Fire Nation or Earth Kingdom—would be wiped out." Katara's eyes widened at this. Sokka went on doggedly, "And he didn't just try to destroy a town. He tricked Aang into helping him, by using waterbending to fill up a dam. Think about what it was like for him, to almost have blood on his hands. The kid doesn't even eat meat, and he almost helped kill all the people in that town!"

Toph overheard him, and felt her own heart harden slightly at this. She had seen Aang upset before; she hated the thought of him almost doing something he would never want to do.

"What are you thinking?" Sokka asked, peering at Katara.

"I don't know," Katara answered with a shrug. "It's just … I like to think that people can change. He's honest when he says he wants to help us. I trust Toph's judgment; so I think we should trust him."

* * *

><p>Zuko found the "Lost Appa" leaflet just after Iroh was offered the opportunity to run his own teashop.<p>

So the Avatar was in the city. _Of course_ their paths would cross again.

He could almost see two paths emerging in front of him: one where he chased after his enemies (and friends), and another where he tried to forget about his past and make a new life. Iroh seemed quite happy with the latter choice, for himself at least.

Zuko decided he couldn't do nothing when he knew that the Avatar was in the city, and that he could have an advantage over him.

Tracking down the flying bison proved almost easier than he'd expected. In his old Blue Spirit guise—which he had again adopted as a fugitive in the Earth Kingdom—he was able to interrogate a Dai Li agent, who revealed that his leader was keeping the animal at their headquarters, underneath Lake Laogai.

"Expecting someone else?"

Appa shifted nervously, rattling his chains. Zuko approached the animal slowly. "You remember me. I saved your owner and his friend. I even rode on you, with them."

Appa made a noise almost like a scowl, looking over him mistrustfully. "You're mine now," Zuko said.

Suddenly he heard the door grind open, and light spilled into the cell. Zuko turned, holding his swords up to defend himself. He stopped short when he saw who it was.

"Uncle?"

Iroh closed the door and turned to face him. "So, the Blue Spirit. I wonder who could be behind that mask?"

Zuko sighed, removing the blue opera mask. "What are you doing here?"

"I was just about to ask you the same thing. What do you plan to do now that you have found the Avatar's bison? Keep it locked in our new apartment? Should I go put on a pot of tea for him?"

"First I have to get it out of here."

Iroh looked thoroughly displeased. "Do you remember the time when Katara challenged you to a duel? Neither of you thought about what the outcome might be."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"It has to do with the fact that you never think these things through! This is exactly what happened when you captured the Avatar at the North Pole! You had him, and then you had nowhere to go!"

"I would have figured something out!" Zuko said heatedly.

"No!" Iroh was shouting now. "If his friends hadn't found you, you would have frozen to death!"

Zuko turned away, anguished, his fury almost matching Iroh's. "I know my own destiny, Uncle."

"Is it your _own_ destiny? Or is it a destiny someone else has tried to force on you?"

Zuko couldn't stand it. He had spent too long trying to avoid thoughts like that. "Stop it, Uncle. I have to do this."

"I'm _begging_ you, Prince Zuko!"

_Prince_ Zuko. It had been a while since Iroh—or anyone for that matter—had called him that.

"It's time for you to look inward, and begin asking yourself the big questions. Who are you? And what do _you_ want?"

* * *

><p>It was actually very lucky that Team Avatar had run into Jet's friends, Smellerbee and Longshot. They were able to avoid following the Dai Li's false trail, something that could have ruined their entire effort to win the war in their limited time frame.<p>

It was Sokka who deduced that Jet was, in fact, not lying; he thought he was telling the truth about his time in Ba Sing Se, because he had been brainwashed. Despite the bad news, Katara was glad that he recognized Jet's genuinely good intentions.

Katara's healing abilities helped Jet to relax his mind and remember what had happened before he was hypnotized and brainwashed. "They took me to a headquarters, under the water … like a lake."

"Wait!" Sokka exclaimed. "Remember what Joo Dee said? She said she went on vacation to Lake Laogai."

"That's it!" Jet stood again. "Lake Laogai."

The following morning they were able to take the train outside the city, to the countryside contained within the great wall. It looked like a normal lake; in fact it was a fairly peaceful place.

Toph was able to sense and uncover the entrance, a shaft that ran deep into the water. Momo flew away, apparently preferring to wait for the others rather than go into such a dark, strange place. But the seven teenagers ventured down the ladder through the vertical tunnel.

The underground base was a series of large corridors with rooms on either side. The entire place was lit in an eerie greenish light. "It's all starting to come back to me," Jet murmured as he led the group into the main chamber. They passed a room where a Dai Li agent was apparently training rows of identically dressed women to perform as Joo Dees, reciting the falsely warm welcomes that she had given the group.

Aang felt his stomach churn with anticipation—something he'd felt earlier when they thought they were about to find Appa—as well as apprehension of these new surroundings. The idea of being underground and underwater was claustrophobic enough; but the Dai Li headquarters was nothing short of sinister, with facilities to imprison and brainwash people.

What if the Dai Li captured them and made them forget who they were or why they were in Ba Sing Se? What if they made him forget his friends, or the fact that there was a war going on? What if they couldn't trust each other, or even trust their own minds?

"Your heart's beating a mile a minute," Toph informed him quietly.

"Is it?" Aang muttered.

Suddenly Toph did something unexpected: she took Aang's hand in her own. At first Aang was surprised, thinking she was trying to reassure him; but then she felt his wrist and said, "Yup," confirming the speed of the pulse she had felt through the earth. Then she let go of his wrist.

"I think there might be a cell big enough to hold Appa up ahead," Jet said. He stopped before a sealed stone door. "I think it's through here."

Toph earthbent the door, making it slide open to reveal an enormous cavern. They went in cautiously, and were disappointed to see that Appa wasn't there. Just then, the door sealed shut behind them. There was a long pause; then Toph heard Sokka observe, "Now that's something different."

"You have made yourselves enemies of the state," That was Long Feng; but she couldn't feel him or anyone else in the room. Then he instructed the others, "Take them into custody."

She felt several men land on the floor, surrounding the group. Then the real battle commenced.

Toph secretly thought that it felt good to be fighting again, after so many weeks of living peacefully in the city. All of them—Team Avatar and the Freedom Fighters—displayed teamwork, helping when one of the others was being attacked. At one point, Jet saved Toph. A Dai Li agent had grabbed her with a rock glove; but Jet intervened, hooking his sword on her belt and pulling her out of the way.

"Long Feng is escaping!" Aang exclaimed. He and Jet broke away from the fight to chase after him. Toph lost sight of their vibrations.

Working together, it took the rest of them five or ten minutes to incapacitate the Dai Li agents who were trying to hold them off. "We have to find Aang and Jet," Sokka said, leading the others to the exit. "Maybe they've found Appa!"

They followed the passage to another sealed earthen door. "They're in here," Toph said, before opening the door with earthbending.

Long Feng was gone. Jet was lying on the ground, unmoving, his hook swords dropped at his sides; Toph could feel his heart beating feebly, and the floor had been disturbed in a way that would have thrust the earth at him in an attack. Aang was kneeling next to him, but stood when he saw the others enter. They stood around Jet, looking horrified to find him so critically injured.

Katara quickly bent the water out of her pouch and knelt down to try to heal Jet. She guided the water over his chest, examining his wounds; but the water didn't glow the way it did when she healed someone. "This isn't good," she said, looking back at the others.

"You guys go and find Appa," Smellerbee said readily. "We'll take care of Jet."

"We're not leaving you," Katara insisted.

"There's no time." This was a new voice—it was Longshot, speaking for the first time anyone in Team Avatar could remember. "Just go. We'll take care of him. He's our leader."

Katara, Aang, and Sokka stared at him. Then Jet spoke up, his voice quiet and tender. "Don't worry, Katara. I'll be fine." Somehow he managed to smile at her.

She felt her heart swell with pain, of a kind that she hadn't felt for a long time. She wished she'd had more time to get to know this boy, who had risked so much to help them. Katara brushed Jet's hair out of his face. "Thank you for helping us," she said. She leaned over and kissed him on the forehead. It was a kiss that lingered; another kiss good-bye. Then she stood, and the four teammates left the Freedom Fighters behind.

"He's lying," Toph said softly, in a somber voice. She couldn't bear to tell it to Aang and Katara. She could hear Smellerbee weeping, and the stringing of a bow.

It was the first time Toph could remember knowing a person who died.

They didn't have time to worry or grieve; they knew they were racing against time, that the Dai Li could be upon them again at any moment. "Long Feng definitely has Appa," Aang said. "He's got to be somewhere in here."

They searched quickly, and found only one other room whose door had been sealed with earthbending. Toph moved it easily, and they stepped into a cell equipped with six large manacles chained to the wall.

"Appa's gone," Aang mourned. "Long Feng beat us here."

"If we hurry, we can still catch them," Sokka said.

Toph earthbent a new tunnel to the shore of the lake. They piled out and took off running. When they risked glancing over their shoulders, they saw that Dai Li agents were jumping out of the tunnel, one after another, to give chase.

"Do you think we can outrun them?" Sokka asked.

"I don't think it's gonna matter," Aang said. About a hundred yards before them stood a row of Dai Li earthbenders, with Long Feng in the middle. The earthbenders rose up on a thirty-foot wall, cutting off their escape route. Behind them, the pursuing Dai Li earthbent another wall to prevent them from going back under the lake; and on the cliff above them another row of agents guarded the cliff. They were trapped, boxed in.

Toph wondered if Aang should fly away on his glider; he and one or two others could escape. But there was no way they could split up the team like that.

Katara was thinking about either attacking with water from the lake, or freezing the surface to create a new escape route, when suddenly Momo flew down from the sky and landed on Aang's shoulder, making excited chittering noises.

"What is it Momo?" Everyone paused, watching as the lemur flew up past the Dai Li agents and into the sky; they lost sight of him in the sun's glare.

Then a much larger shape emerged, its silhouette standing out against the sunlight.

"APPA!" Aang cried out, looking ecstatic.

The bison flew low, and crashed through the earth walls. Aang and Toph together earthbent the cliff to throw the Dai Li agents into the lake. The fallen agents fled from the rubble, but Long Feng stood his ground, facing Appa.

"I can handle you by myself," Long Feng all but snarled. The earthbender launched himself at Appa, but the bison caught his leg in his mouth, and threw him into the lake. A moment later he spit out Long Feng's silk shoe, as though to say, _Good riddance._

Sokka laughed for joy. "Deus ex Appa!" he cried, flinging himself onto one of the bison's six legs. They were all laughing and hugging their long-lost friend.

Aang was crying, his face pressed into Appa's fur as he clung to him. "I missed you, buddy," Aang said, his voice cracking slightly.

Toph petted Appa's nose. "Hey, Appa. Would you know what I meant if I said I'm sorry?"

Appa lifted his head; Toph felt something rough and slobbery rub up her front. "Ack!" Toph laughed.

"He understands," Aang assured her.

Toph smiled. "Thanks, Appa." She awkwardly hugged the bison's flank, discreetly rubbing the slobber off.

"Come on," Sokka said, "let's get out of here." They climbed up Appa's tail, and since he no longer had a saddle, the four of them sat together behind Appa's head.

Katara leaned over to look at the lake below them. "Do you think there's any chance …" She trailed off, afraid to hope.

Toph spoke up sympathetically. "He's gone, Katara. He knew he would be, when we left."

Even Sokka was somber. "After everything he did, I thought I'd never feel bad for that guy."

"He's a hero," Katara said, solemn and pensive.

"Yeah." Aang bowed his head. "He is."

Toph couldn't help thinking that it could have been Aang whom Long Feng killed. She wasn't glad that Jet died, but … she was grateful that her closest friends were all right.

They stopped to land on a tiny island in the middle of the lake. Aang embraced Appa's head again. "I missed you more than you'll ever know, buddy."

Sokka turned to the girls. "Look, we escaped from the Dai Li, we got Appa back—I'm telling you, we should go to the Earth King now and tell him our plan. We're on a roll."

Katara looked at him critically. "One good hour after weeks of trouble isn't much of a roll." This seemed especially true considering they had just lost an ally; it was a costly victory.

"We can build on it," Sokka insisted. "If we want to invade the Fire Nation when the eclipse happens, we need the Earth King's support."

"What makes you think we'll get it?" Toph asked. "I don't know if you've noticed, but things don't usually go that smoothly for our little gang."

"I know, but I've got a good feeling about this. This time will be different."

* * *

><p>Sokka and Toph were both right. It was hard getting into the palace; Aang and Toph had to work in sync to use earthbending against the palace guards. Their teamwork, and Aang's improvement in earthbending, were remarkable.<p>

As they expected, Long Feng was waiting for them in the throne room, whispering advice to the Earth King. For one terrifying moment, it looked like it was all over, that they had not only failed to get the Earth King's help but also failed in their long-term mission to save the world.

A dozen small things saved them. Long Feng made the mistake of calling Aang "The Avatar" in the Earth King's presence. (Apparently the King knew what the Avatar was, despite not knowing about the world's current state of affairs.) King Kuei's bear, Bosco, showed friendliness toward Aang, which convinced the Earth King to listen to their story. They were able to prove that Long Feng was lying about not having seen Appa, by revealing the mark from where Appa had bitten him. And most importantly, the drill that they had battled on their arrival to the turned out to be a blessing in disguise: its presence in the wall was proof that the Fire Nation had tried to enter Ba Sing Se by force, with the intent of taking control of the city.

By the time the sun was setting, Long Feng had been arrested, and Sokka—in an impressive display of persuasion—finally got to explain why they had sought out the Earth King.

"We don't have much time," Aang said earnestly. "There's a comet coming this summer. Its energy will give the fireenders unbelievable strength. They'll be unstoppable."

It was the first time Toph had heard about Sozin's Comet. Now she understood why they were so anxious to have him master the elements so soon; they were, in fact, racing against time. To King Kuei, it simply sounded like more bad news.

"But there _is_ hope," Sokka said. "Before the comet comes, we have a window of opportunity. A solar eclipse is coming. The sun will be entirely blocked out by the moon, and the firebenders will be helpless."

"What are you suggesting, Sokka?" King Kuei asked.

"What's the day we need to invade the Fire Nation," Sokka said decisively. "The Day of Black Sun."

The Earth King looked apprehensive. This was the kind of decision he would usually leave to Long Feng, or ask his advice about. "I don't know. That would require moving troops out of Ba Sing Se. We'd be completely vulnerable." He understood now that the capital was the only Earth Kingdom stronghold left.

"You're _already_ vulnerable," Sokka insisted. "The Fire Nation won't stop until Ba Sing Se falls. You can either sit back and wait for that to happen, or take the offensive, and give yourself a fighting chance."

There was a long, anxious pause as the Earth King considered. The kids all knew that this was the moment of truth, the moment they had been working toward ever since they left Won Shi Tong's library. The decision made now could change the course of the war.

Then, King Kuei smiled. "Very well," he said. "You have my support."

The teenagers whooped and cheered. "Alright! Good work, team!" They had done it; they had accomplished both of their goals for Ba Sing Se.

* * *

><p>Iroh could remember sitting up with a young Lu Ten when he fell sick. He also had memories of helping to treat sick or injured soldiers during his days as a military leader.<p>

"You should know this is not a natural sickness. But that shouldn't stop you from drinking tea."

"What?" Zuko sounded disoriented. "What's happening?"

Iroh had actually been expecting something like this to happen—ever since Zuko made the choice to defend a waterbender and rescue the Avatar. Only this most recent choice hadn't been made out of affection or a sense of duty; Zuko had released the Avatar's bison at Iroh's urging, because it had been the right thing to do, though not the thing that would help Zuko in any way.

"Your critical decision, what you did beneath that lake … it was in such conflict with your image of yourself, that you are now at war within your own mind and body."

"What's that mean?" Zuko fell back in a fit of coughing.

"You're going through a metamorphosis, my nephew," Iroh said seriously. "It will not be a pleasant experience; but when you come out of it, you will be the beautiful prince you were always meant to be."

* * *

><p>General How, the leader of the Earth King's highest-ranking generals, showed them what had been found in their search of Long Feng's office. "There are secret files on everyone in Ba Sing Se—including you kids."<p>

A guardsman produced for them a small ornate box. The Earth King opened the chest and removed the first scroll. "Toph Bei Fong." The Earth King handed the scroll to Toph, who wordlessly passed it to Katara.

"It's a letter from your mom," Katara said, scanning the scroll. "Your mom's in the city, and she wants to see you."

Toph felt several emotions jolt her at the same time. She was surprised that her mother could have followed her here, and now wanted to see her. She was angry that the Dai Li had kept this news from her. "Long Feng intercepted our letters from home?" she said in disgust. "That's just sad."

"Aang." The Earth King held out another scroll.

"This scroll was attached to the horn of your bison when the Dai Li captured it," General How explained.

Aang looked it over. "It's from the Eastern Air Temple," he said, looking surprised but pleased.

"Is there a letter for me and Sokka, by any chance?" Katara asked hopefully.

"I'm afraid not," King Kuei said apologetically.

The two siblings exchanged disappointed glances. "Oh," was all Sokka said.

General How spoke up. "But there _is_ an intelligence report that might interest you." He handed yet another scroll to Katara.

"'_A small fleet of Water Tribe ships_,'" Katara read aloud.

"What?" Sokka looked over her shoulder eagerly. "That could be Dad!"

He could hear the excitement rising in Katara's voice. "'_… protecting the mouth of Chameleon Bay … led by Hakoda._' It _is_ Dad!" she exclaimed.

Hearing that the other two were busy, Toph turned to Aang, who had finished reading his message. "Can you read my mom's letter to me?"

Aang smiled and took the scroll in his hands. "'_Dear Toph. I can't put into words everything I want to say._'" Both of them thought that those almost could have been his own words. But then he continued,"'_I'm staying in the Upper Ring of Ba Sing Se, and I'd like to see you. I think we should both give each other a chance. I hope you'll come. With love, from your Mother._' There's an address at the end."

"Wow." Toph wondered about how much her mother _wasn't_ saying. The tone sounded as though she was trying to be patient and civil. But such a conciliatory message was more than she had ever hoped to get from her parents, after she ran away from home.

The King and the general left the office to let them talk amongst themselves. They all had news to discuss.

"I can't believe it," Aang said. "There's a man living at the Eastern Air Temple. He says he's a guru."

"What's a guru?" Sokka asked. "Some kind of poisonous blowfish?"

"No, a spiritual expert," Aang said excitedly. "He wants to help me take the next step in the Avatar journey. He says he can teach me to control the Avatar State."

"And I can't believe we know where our dad is now," Katara said happily.

"I know what you mean," Toph agreed. "My mom's in the city … and from her letter, it sounds like she finally understands me."

"This is all such big news, all at once," Sokka said. "Where do we even start?"

"I hate to say it," Katara said slowly, "but … we have to split up."

Toph was about to protest, but Aang beat her to it. "Split up?" He sounded distraught. He felt the same anxiety he'd felt when they met Bato of the Water Tribe, when he'd thought that he would lose his traveling companions. "We just found Appa and got the family back together. Now you want us to separate?"

It was the first time Toph had heard any of them refer to their group as a family. He was right, she thought. But they each had their own families, too. And even if they tried, they couldn't sever their ties with them.

"You have to meet this guru, Aang," Katara said firmly. "If we're going to invade the Fire Nation, you need to be ready."

Aang remembered the last few times he'd entered the Avatar State, and decided that she was right. "Well, if I'm going to the Eastern Air Temple, Appa and I can drop you at Chameleon Bay to see your dad."

Sokka spoke up, sounding resigned. "Someone has to stay here with the Earth King and help him plan for the invasion. I guess that's me?" he said, rising to his feet.

"No Sokka." Katara stood up to look at him. "I know how badly you want to help Dad. You go to Chameleon Bay, I'll stay here with the King."

* * *

><p>The next morning, Aang and Sokka were ready to go on their journey, and Toph was going into the Upper Ring to see her mother.<p>

Sokka approached Katara, who was petting Appa good-bye. "Are you sure you'll be okay on your own?" he asked. Out of the three of them, Katara would probably be the most lonely, among strangers.

Katara smiled and shrugged. "It's not the first time."

"Yeah … And I guess you'll have Momo with you."

"Tell Dad I hope to see him soon," Katara said. Then she hugged him. "That's for when you see him," she explained. Sokka smiled ruefully, hugging his sister.

Earth King Kuei came down the stairs to the plaza. "Aang and Sokka," he said (he was now on a first-name basis with them), "I wish you good journey. Ba Sing Se owes you its thanks, and we look forward to your safe return." Sokka and Aang bowed respectfully to their new ally.

A guard approached the King. "Your Majesty. There are three female warriors here to see you. They're from the island of Kyoshi."

Sokka froze, clinging to Appa's fur. "That's Suki!" he exclaimed. Suddenly he lost his grip and fell onto the stone plaza.

"You know these warriors?" King Kuei asked.

"Oh yeah." Sokka got to his feet and looked confidently at the king. "The Kyoshi Warriors are a skilled group of fighters. Trustworthy too. They're good friends of ours."

The Earth King looked satisfied. "Then we shall welcome them as honored guests."

Katara smiled. So she wouldn't be alone; she'd have Suki and the other girls with her.

"I guess this is it." She turned and saw Aang standing next to her, a sad smile on his face.

Katara hugged him. "Good luck on your spiritual journey," she said cheerfully.

Toph stood off to the side; she could tell they here hugging. When they released each other, she spoke up. "I'm really going to miss you guys." It was her first time separating from her friends, who had been with her constantly for the past two months.

"Me too." Katara put her arms around her in a hug.

Aang looked at them, with a slightly worried expression. "You'll come back, won't you?" Aang hadn't even considered the possibility of what might happen when Toph went to see her mother. Would she want to return to her home?

But Toph smiled, scoffing a little. "Of course I'll come back. You can't get out of training _that_ easily. I'm not finished with you." She punched his arm playfully.

Aang's mouth broke into a wide smile. "You really do care, don't you?"

Toph blinked. "Well, I—" She was cut off when Aang came up and embraced her. Toph smiled as she hugged him back. She liked his hugs. "Thanks," she said into his ear.

"See you soon," Aang promised.

Sokka stood apart, waiting for Aang. Suddenly the other three kids caught him in a group hug. "Ahhh!" Sokka said, embarrassed. "Great, that's enough!" Then he smiled. "Okay, we all love each other! Seriously."

Finally they broke apart. Aang and Sokka climbed up on Appa and waved good-bye to the girls as they took off. It felt good to be flying again, with a plan in mind and a destination before them.

"You see Aang, a little positive thinking works wonders." Sokka held up his fingers as he counted their blessings. "We got the King on our side, we got Long Feng arrested, and when we get back, Suki's waiting for me."

"Yeah … girls are waiting for us," Aang said, and Sokka was too wrapped up in his own happiness to notice Aang's dreamy tone. "Thanks, positive attitude."

"Everything's gonna work out perfectly, from now on and forever," Sokka said, sounding just as cheerful and optimistic as Katara.

"Don't say that; you might jinx it," Aang warned jokingly. But at the same time he remembered what Sokka had said when they arrived in the city. _I'm just saying, weird stuff happens to us_.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: T<strong>he reason I didn't include Jet in the Book 1 part of this story was that I wasn't sure what role he would play later on. I decided to stick with the canon as best I could, which means that Sokka and Aang would have met Jet after the events of "The Waterbending Scroll", while Katara was still on Zuko's ship.


	32. Pressure and Pain

_Published October 24, 2012_

"Pressure and Pain"

* * *

><p>Before I built a wall I'd ask to know<br>What I was walling in or walling out,  
>And to whom I was like to give offense.<br>Something there is that doesn't love a wall,  
>That wants it down.<p>

~ Robert Frost, "Mending Wall"

* * *

><p>Toph stood before the house where the letter had said her mother was staying. She took a deep breath, almost sighing, as though bracing herself.<p>

She told herself that the longer she went without seeing her parents, the harder it would be when—if—they reunited. Her mother had taken the hardest step, reaching out to her. It was only fair that she returned the gesture.

Besides, if she was honest with herself, this was something she needed to do. To see her mother, yes, but even more, to see if anything could be … fixed, between them. That was what Toph had hoped for when she revealed her true self, the night she and Aang were kidnapped.

She stepped forward and knocked on the door. It opened easily; it wasn't even locked. That was strange, especially for Poppy Bei Fong.

Toph pushed the door inward all the way. "Hello? Mom?" She stepped into the building. "Anyone home?"

Something wasn't right. Toph couldn't feel the vibrations that she associated with her mother's careful footsteps; in fact she didn't feel any vibrations at all.

She was just getting into a stance, ready for some kind of trouble, when something happened: she fell onto her back, but she didn't have far to fall, as she found she was in an enclosed space. She felt metal walls surrounding her on all sides.

Her voice came out panicked and fearful. "Hey! Who do you think you're dealing with?"

The voice that answered was harsh and not unfamiliar. "One loud-mouthed little brat who strayed too far from home."

Toph's eyes widened. "No way," she said. "Xin Fu?"

"I'm here too, Toph." That was Master Yu's lisping voice. "We're not here to hurt you. We're just taking you home."

To say she was dismayed would be an understatement. "Let me out of here!" Toph raged, banging against the metal walls. "Ah!" She felt the box moving, as the two men shifted the earth underneath to carry it outside. Toph couldn't do anything to stop them as they loaded it onto a wooden cart, which started rolling away a few minutes later.

Toph stopped banging her fists when she realized she was likely to break them or make them bleed if she continued. She slumped back against one of the metal walls, sighing in frustration.

_How could I be so stupid?_ She hadn't known quite what to think when she went to meet her parents; but it hadn't once occurred to her that it could be a trap. She should know better by now.

Had she really pinned any hope on reuniting with her mother?

Well, now she would be reunited, with both her parents; but not under the circumstances she had hoped for. They would do exactly what they had said they would, and keep her locked up, hidden away from the world.

Only, things were different now. She had seen and met many people—important people, like generals, and even the Earth King. If they saw Aang and the Water Tribe siblings, they would ask where she was.

Could she find an opportunity to escape once she came home? Would her friends be able to rescue her?

By the time they realized that she was in trouble, she would be back in Gaoling. Or maybe her parents would move their household so Aang couldn't find her again.

Toph buried her face in her hands. _Aang_. She had promised that she would come back to him. She was responsible for teaching him earthbending, and he hadn't mastered it yet.

She wouldn't cry. Crying was like despairing, and despair meant giving up. Which she wasn't. She'd get out of here. She _could_ take care of herself.

It just saddened her to think she would have to do it on her own, without her friends there to help her.

* * *

><p>Aang had wondered what kind of person this guru could be. The fact that he lived in an Air Temple, coupled with his obvious sense of spirituality, had made him wonder if he could be another long-lost airbender.<p>

"Um, hello?" Aang dismounted Appa and started up the stairs toward the man, who sat meditating on an earthen platform. "You're Guru Pathik, right? The person who attached the note to Appa's horn?"

"Indeed." The man's voice was high, and his body was thin, but he gave the appearance of being strong. "I was a spiritual brother of your people, and a personal friend of Monk Gyatso."

Gyatso. That was a name Aang hadn't heard or spoken in a very long time. He knew this man must be genuine, if he knew his old teacher's name.

Aang sat down across from the guru. "In your note, you said you could teach me to gain control of the Avatar State. How?"

"You must gain balance within yourself before you can bring balance to the world," Pathik answered sagely.

Aang thought that made sense. He remembered how Katara had once struggled with waterbending because she hadn't come to terms with her thoughts and feelings. Conversely, Aang usually triggered the Avatar State through strong negative emotions.

Maybe there was some kind of balance, something between control and acceptance of emotions.

Pathik wasn't finished. "The first step to balance, is this." He held up a wooden bowl containing a yellow liquid, and passed it to Aang. "Drink up!"

Aang took a hesitant sip; then he spat it out, sputtering, repulsed by startlingly awful taste. "Tastes like onion and banana juice," he exclaimed.

"That's because it is," Guru Pathik said cheerfully. The old man finished what was left in his bowl. "Yum yum!"

For a second Aang was reminded of an old herbalist he'd met while searching for medicine to cure an ailing Sokka. The old woman had been crazy, but she had possessed the knowledge of what it was they needed. And the frozen frog _had_ worked, ultimately.

He decided to go along with it. He tried to drink some more of the concoction, grimacing as it went down. To momentarily stall his drinking, Aang asked questions. "How did you find Appa?"

"I didn't," Pathik replied. "_He_ found _me_, right here in this temple." The guru reached up and petted Appa's flank familiarly. "Many years ago, I had a vision indicating that I would meet and help guide the Avatar. I knew seeing this bison was a sign that it would happen soon."

Aang was puzzled. "If Appa wasn't sold or traded to Ba Sing Se, how did he end up there?" He wondered just how extensive the Dai Li's search for the bison had been.

"You and your bison's energies are mixed," Guru Pathik explained. "I could sense your unbreakable bond. I was able to read Appa's energy and sense where you were; then he was able to follow your path."

"That led him to Ba Sing Se," Aang said, looking amazed.

"It's funny, what invisible strings connect us all," Pathik said sagely.

* * *

><p>"What do you say, Momo?" Katara asked. "A cup of tea before we get back to the king?" They usually wouldn't go to a restaurant as a group, since it could be expensive to pay for four teenagers plus a lemur. But while she was by herself, Katara figured she could have some fun.<p>

"Table for two, please," Katara requested.

A waiter crossed the width of the shop. "Uncle! I need two jasmine, one green and one lychee!"

Katara looked up, startled by the sound of that distinct voice. The cheerfully indignant reply was, "I'm brewing as fast as I can!" And there, behind the counter, she saw General Iroh himself. She could see the waiter's profile now, and saw the scar on the left side of his face. Prince Zuko.

For a moment Katara froze, shocked and disoriented. Zuko and Iroh? In Ba Sing Se? In a teashop?

"Momo," Katara said in a low voice, "am I dreaming?" It almost made sense, because Iroh loved tea. But here …

She stood, rooted to the spot, not knowing what to do. One instinct told her to run—not out of fear, but to avoid an embarrassing and awkward situation. But her own curiosity and confusion were flaring up like the fire that those two men could bend.

Just then Zuko turned around, and saw the customer standing in the threshold of the building. He, too, stopped and stared.

"Katara."

His surprise didn't quite match hers. The tray he was holding trembled, and he gripped it more tightly to keep it from falling to the floor. He looked at her head-on.

Iroh had paused in his work, and turned to see what Zuko was looking at. His countenance lit up with delight when he saw her. "Why, Katara! It's good to see you," he greeted.

"Hi," Katara returned, not knowing what else to say.

Zuko came a few steps closer to her. "What are you doing here?" he asked in a low voice.

Katara's tone was guarded; she was still flustered. "I was … hoping to get some tea."

"Well, let's not leave a customer waiting," Iroh scolded gently.

Zuko shot him a look. The irony of the situation was not lost on any of them. Zuko had once called Katara a peasant, and now he was expected to wait on her.

Katara followed Zuko to a table set for two. Pulling the chair out was now an automatic gesture for Zuko, but when he did it for Katara his cheeks turned slightly pink. Katara felt just as awkward sitting down and letting him slide her chair in.

"So, what can I get you?" Zuko asked, fingering a towel in his belt.

"Um, I'll have … jasmine. And I think Momo would like some lychee nuts."

"Okay." Zuko turned and went back to the kitchen, which at this moment seemed like a refuge. He relayed Katara's order to Iroh, who cheerfully put on another pot of water and went to the pantry to find fresh lychee nuts.

For a moment Zuko gripped the edge of the counter, bowing his head in something like frustration. He didn't know what he was feeling, or how he should act.

Why did Katara have to show up now, just as soon as they had achieved some stability in their lives? All she ever did was make things even more complicated. She made him doubtful and uncertain, when he used to be so sure of himself and what he had to do.

Today, at least, Zuko had felt newly determined to be happy with the way things were. After all, things _were_ turning up for them: after weeks of homeless wandering, they had a nice apartment, and their own business.

The last thing either he or Iroh needed was to be pulled back into a conflict.

"Lee! No dawdling."

Zuko scowled and got Katara's order ready. He took a deep breath, trying to collect himself, and then stepped back into the dining area.

The lemur was playing with the napkin on the table. He leapt down to the floor when Zuko came over and placed the teapot and cup before her.

"Thank you," Katara said, raising her eyes to meet his.

Iroh passed by them, carrying a tray with other customers' orders. "Lee, why don't you take your break now? You two can catch up," he said with a twinkle in his eye.

Katara opened her mouth to protest politely, but then she realized that was the real reason she had come in once she saw them. She wanted to know—had to find out—what they were doing here.

Zuko gave Iroh a long hard look. Iroh merely smiled and held out the tray of teacups. Zuko swiped one of the empty cups, then sat down across from Katara.

"How did you find me?" Zuko asked in a low voice.

"I wasn't looking for you. I just … found you."

"That's the way it often happens," Iroh said, winking at Zuko. "You find just the thing you aren't looking for."

Not knowing what else to do, Katara took the teapot and poured tea for herself and Zuko. It was a strange, yet somehow normal gesture—a sign of hospitality, in most every culture. If nothing else, it was something that could relax people, ease tension between them.

"So … what are you doing in the city?"

Zuko shrugged. "We were refugees. We came to the city to hide from Azula. We started out working at a teashop in the Lower Ring. But Uncle followed his passion and we just opened our own teashop."

"Well … congratulations," Katara said to Iroh. She knew how much he loved tea.

"Thank you," he said, beaming. "If you'll excuse me …" He bustled off to the kitchen in the back of the teashop, leaving Katara and Zuko alone.

The two teenagers sat in silence for a moment. They both thought of the last time they'd had tea alone together.

_First cup, stranger. Second, friend. Third, family_.

"So … have you made any friends, here?"

Zuko hesitated, but then apparently decided to share an answer with her. "Well, I did go out with this one girl." Zuko looked off to the side, smiling. "Jin."

"Really?" Katara looked slightly surprised.

Zuko smirked, just a little. "Why the tone of surprise?" he teased.

"No reason. I think it's sweet that you went on a date," Katara added truthfully.

"… Thanks." It almost sounded like a question.

Katara gazed around the teashop, watching Iroh brew tea and wait on customers. The old man seemed to be in his element, sharing tea and anecdotes with people. It was such a fine and pleasant teashop … and such a permanent investment, Katara wasn't sure what to think of it.

She spoke in a low, confidential tone, knowing that it would be dangerous if anyone overheard what she was about to ask. "So … does this mean … you're not hunting the Avatar anymore?"

Zuko's face hardened; he ducked his head to avoid eye contact with Katara. He didn't want to see the hopeful look in her eyes.

He didn't want to give an answer, because saying it—whatever it was—would make it true.

Katara didn't press him for an answer. But his silence did something to renew her wariness. At that moment he wasn't a former love interest (dare she say ex-boyfriend?), but a former enemy—and in a sense, he had never officially abandoned either role in her life.

She remembered him tracking them and paralyzing them with a giant mole, even after they had bonded. He had fought her and kidnapped Aang at the North Pole, even after taking care to make sure they were out of Zhao's hands. A month ago, he had been ready to fight in that ghost town, even after she had helped save him and kissed him when they last said good-bye.

Katara felt anguished. This was why she didn't think it was feasible for her and Zuko to have a relationship. She just didn't know if she trusted Zuko not to take action against them—Team Avatar, as Sokka would say.

But if what they said was true, Zuko and Iroh had come here to hide from Azula, not to track down Aang. The last time they had seen each other, Iroh had been in critical condition.

"Are you really okay? You're … safe, here?"

She didn't fail to notice the looks that Iroh and Zuko exchanged.

"We had a close call, a few weeks ago," Iroh admitted.

"Some guy we met on the way into the city tried to tell everyone that we were firebenders," Zuko said, his voice casually disbelieving. "But the Dai Li were more concerned with the scene he was making than with the two of us."

Katara frowned. "The Dai Li," she murmured. "Who was this guy?"

Zuko didn't know why she wanted to know, but he answered anyway. "His name was Jet. He called himself a Freedom Fighter."

Katara covered her mouth with her hand. "What?" Zuko asked, confused by her reaction. "Did you know him?

Katara folded her arms, looking sullen. "Sokka and Aang knew him—they met him while I was on your ship. Then, we saw him, less than a week ago. So that's why he was arrested," Katara murmured, looking at the table with a hard expression.

Zuko looked at her warily, wondering what she was thinking. Did she blame the firebenders for what had happened to Jet? "What happened to him?"

"He's dead," Katara said. "The Dai Li's leader killed him while he was helping us find Appa."

Zuko looked surprised. "I'm … sorry."

"Thanks." She didn't say _That's okay_, because it wasn't. She was still trying to recover from what happened in Lake Laogai, just a few days ago. Leaving Jet behind had brought back the kind of emotions she'd felt the day her mother died. Since then, she'd been so busy that she hardly had time to mourn; but when she was alone with her thoughts, she would feel waves of grief and regret and remorse.

What if she had been able to heal Jet? What if he had survived, and even stuck around with Team Avatar? Would she have initiated a relationship with him? Would she be feeling so conflicted about Zuko now?

Would he have ever been in that situation, if it weren't for Zuko and Iroh?

No. She couldn't think that way. It wasn't their fault.

Zuko's voice pulled her out of her thoughts. "So what brought _you_ to the city?" He knew part of the answer, but it seemed like a natural thing to ask, and any talk would be better than the tense, awkward silence that threatened to overwhelm them.

Katara gulped down her tea with some difficulty, stalling for time to think about her response. "Well," she said carefully, "some people stole Appa, and we came here to look for him." He didn't need to know about their pending invasion, or the fact that they were in close contact with the Earth King and his generals. She could feel the thin scroll poking out of her belt, and prayed that Zuko wouldn't notice it.

"Did you find him?" Zuko tried to sound only politely curious.

"Yes."

"Good." There was a short pause. "So, are you staying here much longer?"

"Yeah … A little while, I think." She was smart enough to know better than to say she was by herself at the moment, or what the others were doing now. He didn't need to know.

"I should probably get going." Katara left a few coins on the table and stood up. "Thank you for the tea."

"Do come again," Iroh said jovially.

"I will," Katara said with a smile. She meant it, too. She called Momo over to her and walked out of the teashop.

Zuko noticed Iroh looking at him. "What?" he asked irately.

Iroh smiled serenely. "I seem to recall you asking if I had any old friends who didn't want to attack me." He tossed his head toward the door through which Katara had just exited. "There's your answer."

After a moment, Zuko smiled too, in spite of himself.

* * *

><p>Toph couldn't think about much besides the issue of what would happen when she saw her parents again, if these earthbenders-turned-bounty hunters succeeded in bringing her home.<p>

Were they really convinced that, if they kept trying, they could shape her into the person they wanted her to be?

Toph remembered her mother's delicate voice telling her about manners She had one memory of her mother showing her different types of fabric to feel and identify. Every day she instructed Toph in how to dress herself and fix her hair

She could remember how her father's voice sounded when he lectured her about how to manage a fortune and run an estate.

If she spoke, they told her to use soft and polite words. If she went outside, they told her not to get dirty. When she ate, they told her to take small bites so she wouldn't choke, and chew quietly with her mouth closed, and a thousand other rules just for meals.

All they made her feel was pressure and pain.

Toph imagined telling them her side of the story, about how she had felt while living with them, and what she had done since she left. They would be horrified when she described what she had been through—nearly dying of thirst, facing giant buzzard-wasps, almost drowning, taking orders from an amateur midwife, leaving behind a dying friend, even breaking into the palace of the Earth King himself.

But now, ironically, she was going through the trauma of being kidnapped. Surely her parents wouldn't have authorized that.

What had made her father think that these two could work together to bring her home? They may have succeeded in capturing her, but she sensed friction when they argued about what route to take to go to her home. Perhaps now was as good a chance as she would get.

"Hey! Can you two old ladies quit your bickering for a second? I gotta go to the bathroom!" This was only partly true, but in any case it was worth trying. In the past she had sometimes interrupted Master Yu's lesson with the announcement that she had to go to the bathroom; so his instinct was to comply.

"Oh," Yu hesitated, sounding reluctant. "Okay, but make it quick."

"What's wrong with you?" she heard Xin Fu demand.

"Oh—very sneaky Toph!" She hated hearing that condescending voice again. "Nice try, but you can't trick me."

In a moment of sheer frustration, Toph banged on the walls of her cage and shouted furiously. "Let me out of here, so I can kick both your butts!"

"Quit your banging." Xin Fu struck the side of the box. "You might think you're the greatest earthbender in the world, but even you can't bend metal!"

The wagon started moving again. Toph had a strange feeling, or perhaps it was a thought. Xin Fu's contemptuous put-down echoed in her mind.

Sokka had described to her the process of making metal. It had to be refined, processed, melted, and pounded. It had to endure pressure and pain.

But despite how it changed, it must still have a basis in earth.

Toph pressed the palm of her hand against the wall of her cage. She remembered feeling the metal drill that had threatened to break through the wall of Ba Sing Se.

This metal wasn't animated, so it was easier to feel it out. Instead of banging on it, Toph struck the walls the way she struck rocks when she wanted to bend them, in a way that would send vibrations through it. She stomped her foot on the floor, the way she would on the ground; she even hit her fists against the ceiling of the cage.

There; she could sense them—small bits of earth, some of them mere particles. She struck the walls methodically, willing the vibrations to travel to the earth and back to her.

Toph smiled to herself, already feeling a small sense of triumph. Then she inhaled and exhaled, bracing herself; then she assumed an earthbending stance, bracing her feet against the metal floor, and thrusting her hands out on the wall, straining against it.

"Come on, metal … budge."

She would get out of here, or die trying!

She punched the metal harder than ever—and suddenly, she made an indentation in the wall, pushing it outward.

"Phew!" Toph shook out her stinging hand; then she clenched it in a triumphant fist. "Toph, you rule," she said aloud.

She spent another few hours experimenting, testing and improving her control over the metal. As hard as it was to teach Aang, it seemed just as hard—if not more so—to teach herself. Could this even be called teaching? It was more like discovering, exploring. Toph knew that no one had ever been able to bend metal, though it had been suggested and maybe even tested throughout history.

Toph smiled to herself. She couldn't wait to show this to Aang.

* * *

><p>Guru Pathik was right; opening the chakras <em>was<em> an intense experience. Aang found himself facing and mentally coming to terms with all the things that frightened him, haunted him, that dampened his spirit. But once he did that, opening each chakra left him with an increased sense of peace. In a way, it was just speeding up processes of healing inside himself that might have happened gradually over time.

It was easy to think of the grief he felt over losing his people, now that he was back in a place where they had lived. When he closed his eyes, he could see Monk Gyatso, who had been both brother and father to him, in front of a crowd of other Air Nomads he had known and loved. In his mind's eye they suddenly disappeared in a mist that swirled around them and separated Aang from the rest of them.

Through the haze he could hear Guru Pathik's guiding voice. "You have indeed felt a great loss. But love is a form of energy, and it swirls all around us. The Air Nomads' love for you has not left this world. It is still inside you, and is reborn in the form of new love."

Aang spent a slightly longer period meditating on that. Katara was the only person with whom he had openly expressed personal love (though they both knew it was ultimately platonic).

He thought of the Earth Kingdom family they had escorted through the Serpent's Pass, how happy and loving they had been toward each other and toward their newborn baby. He remembered telling Toph that he would like that for himself one day.

Other recent memories resurfaced: Toph's hand grasping his wrist; her fingers exploring his face; how pretty she looked with her hair down; the way she had hugged him, felt his heartbeat, and whispered in his ear.

He'd been so busy—even during those weeks in Ba Sing Se, he'd spent time training and worrying about Appa—he hadn't really taken the time to analyze his own feelings. He just felt them briefly, at different times. But if he allowed himself to think about all of them, and what his feelings could mean …

Did he have a crush on Toph?

If there was one thing that this process was teaching him, it was to be honest with himself and accept his thoughts and emotions.

So be it, Aang decided. He had a crush on Toph. He liked her. Maybe one day that could grow into something more. Right now all he knew was that thinking of her gave him a feeling of happiness, and even joy.

Katara gave him comfort and companionship. Sokka offered humor, guidance, and camaraderie.

_Together we're Team Avatar_. He felt so much love for his friends. In fact, to all intents and purposes, they were his family.

When Aang exited his trance, he found that he had been crying; but what had started as tears of sadness had turned to tears of happiness.

* * *

><p>Katara took a roundabout route back to the palace. Truthfully, she didn't want to go back and talk to the Earth King and the generals, after just having tea with two people they would surely want imprisoned.<p>

Zuko's mention of the Dai Li had frightened her a little. For all she knew, they were still acting as the secret police of Ba Sing Se. What if they discovered the two firebenders hiding in their pristine city? She hated the thought of them being captured, imprisoned, or punished in worse ways.

The Earth King was not in the throne room when she arrived there. Katara stood behind a column, peeking out from behind it. "I don't think we were followed," she said quietly to Momo.

"Who would follow you?"

Katara jumped and whirled around to see three Kyoshi Warriors sitting before her. Suki was not with them, but Katara must have met these girls before—though she couldn't clearly remember the names and appearances of the other warriors.

"Oh—hi. No one," Katara said. The girls looked at her, either blank or unconvinced. "I just … ran into somebody I used to know," Katara said lamely, trying to sound casual.

"Who was it? An ex-boyfriend?" one girl with a long braid asked in a youthful voice.

Katara rubbed the back of her neck nervously. "Um … not exactly."

"Do tell," the girl in the front said, motioning for Katara to sit with them.

Katara hesitated. Maybe she _should_ tell them. She didn't know if she could trust Zuko … but she didn't want to betray them to the authorities. She'd just tell her friends, her closest allies, so they were aware, in case anything did happen with Zuko and Iroh.

"Do you promise you won't tell anyone unless it's absolutely necessary?" Katara asked.

The three girls nodded.

"Okay. Something weird is going on," Katara said. "I—I just saw Prince Zuko and his uncle in the city."

The lead girl's eyes widened. Katara went on, "But get this: they're running a tea shop in the Upper Ring. They told me that they came here as refugees, to hide from the Fire Nation. I'd like to believe that, but I'm just not sure … only, I can't let the Dai Li or anyone know. It's a moral dilemma."

The girls just looked at her. "I don't understand," one of them said, in a low voice that sounded vaguely familiar. "They're your enemies, but you don't want to put them away?"

The girl with the braid gasped. "Wait a minute." A delighted smile spread across her face. "It all makes sense now! You and Zuko—Zuko and you—you were a couple!"

"What?" Katara was startled, but also felt some creeping embarrassment. "Where did you get that idea? Has Sokka been talking about me behind my back?" she asked accusingly.

The lead warrior stood up. "You know, there were _rumors_ that Zuko once took a waterbender prisoner." She advanced toward Katara, who saw that her eyes were golden-amber in color. "Gossip and wartime rumors from Zuko and Zhao's former crewmen."

Katara froze, her eyes widening as the other girls rose to their feet. She recognized them, now: the three girls from Omashu. And the one right in front of her was none other than Zuko's sister.

Azula saw the flash of recognition in her eyes. Katara uncorked her canteen, but her reflex was slow, and Ty Lee took advantage of her shock to leap forward; when she flipped over Katara, her hand squeezed Katara's shoulder. Katara lost most of the feeling in her body, and fell sideways on the floor, her bending water pooling around her.

She could sense the three girls standing behind her. "So, Zuzu's in the city too," Azula mused. "I think it's time for a family reunion."

"What? No!" Katara exclaimed, before she could stop herself.

Azula stepped into her line of vision and bent down to look at her. "So you _do_ care for him," she observed. Her smile at that moment was positively cruel. All at once Katara was reminded of Zhao—but it was even more disturbing to see that kind of wickedness on the face of a girl her own age.

Katara felt sick, realizing the reason and strategy the Fire Nation girls were using. Team Avatar had stopped their drill by sabotaging it from the inside. Now Azula and her friends were using the same strategy, taking over Ba Sing Se from the inside.

Mai and Ty Lee picked her up, each holding her by an arm. Katara glared at the Fire Nation princess. "Do you have any honor, Azula?" Katara shouted. "Because you just made a promise!"

"Oh, the Earth King will never know about them," Azula assured her.

That didn't make Katara feel any better. Tears mixed with the water that had spilled from her canteen.

"Don't worry; you'll be seeing Zuko _very_ soon," Azula said in a sickeningly sweet voice. Then she waved her hand, signaling the girls to take the new prisoner away.

Katara felt even worse than she had when Zuko captured her. He had done it partly to save her. But for Azula, she was a tool, nothing more or less.

* * *

><p>Aang found that some of Guru Pathik's lessons felt less like newfound knowledge, and more like a rephrasing of things that he had already been aware of.<p>

"The sixth pool of energy is the Light Chakra, located in the center of the forehead. It deals with insight, and is blocked by illusion."

This made Aang think of Toph again. She was insightful in a way no one else was.

"The greatest illusion of this world is the illusion of separation," Guru Pathik lectured. "Things you think are separate and different are actually one and the same."

"Like the four nations," Aang realized.

"Yes," Pathik said approvingly. "We are all one people, but we live as if divided."

"We're all connected." Aang opened his eyes, recalling a lesson he'd learned from Huu at the Swamp. "Everything is connected." That was why he had seen Toph in the Swamp, and how he had found Appa and Momo there, and how Appa had found his way back to him in Ba Sing Se.

"That's right. Even the separation of the four elements is an illusion. If you open your mind, you will see that all the elements are one. Four parts of the same whole. Even metal is just a part of earth that has been purified and refined."

It was the kind of lesson that made you look at things in a different light.

That night Pathik and Aang went to the flat-topped roof of the highest tower of the Eastern Air Temple.

"This is the last chakra, isn't it?" Aang realized.

"Yes. Once you open this chakra, you will be able to go in and out of the Avatar State at will. And when you are in the Avatar State, you will have complete control and awareness of all your actions."

Aang couldn't deny that he felt some excitement now. "Let's do this," he said confidently.

"The thought chakra is located at the crown of the head. It deals with pure cosmic energy and is blocked by earthly attachment. Meditate on what attaches you to this world."

The word "earthly" made Aang think of his own earthbending teacher. For a moment, in his mind's eye he saw Toph standing on the ground, turning her face up to the sky, while he flew above on his glider. Toph reached out to him; Aang closed his glider and started to make his way gracefully back to the earth, reaching for her outstretched hands. She could go deeper into the earth; he could go higher in the sky; but they would meet halfway, and help each other …

"Now, let all of those attachments go. Let them flow down the river. Forgotten."

Aang was jolted out of his trance. "What?" He felt startled, both by Pathik's instruction and by his own thoughts. "W-what about my friends? My family? My teachers? I can't just forget about them. I …" He faltered, because voicing his thoughts would make them real. "My earthbending teacher is a girl … I think I might love her," Aang confessed.

Pathik's tone was reasonable. "Learn to let them go, or you cannot let the pure cosmic energy flow in from the universe."

"Why would I choose cosmic energy over my friends?" Aang asked crossly; he could just imagine Toph scoffing at the idea. "How could it be a bad thing that I feel an attachment to her? Three chakras ago, that was a good thing. She's good for me—even for my spirituality." He tried to explain, in a way that might make him understand. "You taught me about illusion. Toph is good at—at dispelling illusions. She can tell when people are lying; she recognizes truth, the fifth chakra. She helps me see the world for what is really is. She helps me see what's really there." He thought fleetingly of how he had met her at the Earth Rumble, but had to search further to find out who she really was.

"You _must_ learn to let go," Pathik said firmly.

Aang looked at him uncertainly, feeling hopeless and lost. What was he supposed to do?

If Toph felt the same way about him—and Aang suspected that she did—how would she feel if he told her they couldn't be together, that he couldn't love her the same way?

Toph was a realist; she understood that he had duties as the Avatar. But would she understand the spiritual side of those duties? She was so physical in her understanding of the world. The cosmos were hard enough for a person with sight to understand; how could he explain it to a blind person?

She was strong, though. Perhaps, if they ever had to actually talk about it, she'd accept the reality—like Aang had when he learned that Katara didn't like him that way.

_You've done it before. You let go of Katara._

_ It wasn't easy, but you came to accept it._

But what he felt for Toph was different. He'd had a crush on Katara from the very start. With Toph, he had sought friendship first—though perhaps the idea of love had been somewhere in the back of his mind. He had only _really_ started thinking that way after their friendship was formed and strengthened. And somehow that made it run deeper, as though it was rooted more firmly.

"Aang." Pathik's voice was calm. "To master the Avatar State, you must open _all_ the chakras. Surrender yourself."

Aang sighed. "Okay," he said reluctantly. "I'll try." He had to—for the sake of the world, and ironically for the sake of his friends.

_In his mind, he looked down on the world and saw himself holding on to Toph. At Pathik's prompting he gently slipped his hands out of hers, and allowed himself to float up above the mountains and into the starry sky. He also saw Katara and Sokka, but their images floated away, past the mountains and out of sight._

_ Aang floated above the earth, in the depth of space. He found a ray of light to walk on. He could see and feel the cosmos, the spiritual and metaphysical energy of the universe._

_ As he advanced, he realized that his arrow tattoos were glowing; the chi was flowing through his body, unhindered by troublesome emotions._

_ Air was the element of freedom. And Aang had never felt more free than he did now._

_ He reached the end of the lit pathway. The sphere of energy that indicated the Avatar State came to rest on him, around him. Aang closed his eyes, feeling the energy wash over him._

_ Suddenly he heard something, a sound which he recognized as Katara's distressed cry. When he opened his eyes, he saw Katara. She seemed to be chained by the wrists to opposite walls, the way Aang had been when Zhao captured him at the Pouhai Stronghold. "Let me go!" Katara demanded, straining against the chains._

_ Aang turned his back on the sphere and started running back the way he had come, undoing the progress he had made. But as he ran, whatever ethereal structure he was standing on started to fade at one end; then it caught up with him, and he had nothing to stand on; then his physical body had a brief sensation of falling._

Aang opened his eyes, startled out of his meditation. "Katara's in danger! I have to go!"

"No, Aang!" Pathik called out in concern as Aang started to run down the spire. "By choosing attachment, you have locked the chakra." Aang stopped, listening to him. "If you leave now, you will not be able to enter the Avatar State at all!" Pathik warned.

For a moment Aang seriously considered his options. Pathik was convinced that he needed to stay long enough to finish meditating, let go of his attachments, and master the Avatar State.

It wouldn't be the first time he had put off a rescue. He remembered discussing with Sokka whether they should rescue Katara right away, after Zuko had captured her.

_"Katara is confident that you can save the world; she wouldn't want you to sacrifice the world to save her."_

But when she was Zuko's prisoner, Aang knew who her captor was. Now, he didn't know who had imprisoned her. What if it was the Dai Li? What if they tried to brainwash her? Or maybe the fall of the Dai Li had given an opening for criminals and assassins … he had no way of knowing what might happen to her.

_Am I being selfish? Is it selfish of me to put my friends before the rest of the world?_

Hadn't Katara had a dilemma like that? She had set aside her feelings for Zuko, knowing that resolving the war was more important than a (brief?) love between two people.

But this was nothing like a passing affair. Aang, Katara, Sokka, and Toph were on the same side, the same team. Hadn't they come to depend on each other?

Aang had to be the only one who knew that Katara was in danger. Who else was going to help her? It had to be him.

He could let go of a crush, but he couldn't let go of a friend.

Guru Pathik watched sadly as Aang leapt down the height of the spire, found Appa and left the Eastern Air Temple. He had fulfilled the events he had seen in his vision so long ago.

He had done everything he could. Now the Avatar's spirituality was entirely up to Aang.

* * *

><p>Toph could tell when night fell as the temperature dropped and the metal turned cool to the touch. Then Toph made her move. Using all her concentration, strength, and willpower, she managed to wrench open a side of the cage, ripping the wall in half. But this made a loud metallic noise, which caused Xin Fu to stop the cart.<p>

The two men came around to the other side of the cart, and saw the gaping hole left in the back of the cage. "It's another one of her tricks!" Master Yu proclaimed.

Xin Fu was irritated. "There's a giant hole in the box! How's that a trick?"

"It's _not_!" They turned around, and saw Toph standing farther down the path, facing them in an offensive stance. "It's the real deal!" she told them.

She worked quickly, bending two earthen slabs on either side of the bounty hunters and trapping them in between. Then she hurled them into the metal cage—why not give them a dose of their own medicine? She wished she could see the expressions on their faces when she used metalbending to seal the hole in the cage, trapping them inside together.

Toph leapt onto the top of the metal box, holding up her fist in triumph. "I am the greatest earthbender in the world! Don't you two dunderheads ever forget it!" she thundered, stomping on the cage. Then she jumped back down to the ground, bending the earth beneath her as she landed, and started running, pulsing the earth to push her ahead.

She was reminded somewhat of the night she had run away from home. For the second time in her life, she was escaping. She was free. And now she needed to find her friends.

* * *

><p>Despite the terrain being sand instead of snow, Sokka almost felt like he was home again. For two years he'd been the eldest boy in the tribe, surrounded by women and children. Now he was back among the men, the warriors whom he had always looked up to.<p>

He was almost surprised by how normal it felt to be with his father again. Explaining and setting up tangle mines gave the same sense of bonding as hunting or setting traps.

Sokka was surprised but ultimately pleased when Hakoda said he was to come into the battle with them against the Fire Nation ships entering the bay. "You don't know what this means to me, Dad," he said earnestly when they were about to leave. "I'll make you proud. And I'll finally prove to you what a great warrior I am."

He regretted saying that almost immediately. If he was really that, he wouldn't have said that he wanted to prove it. He didn't particularly like being a kid who wanted to prove himself. But that's what he was, and they both knew it.

"Sokka." Hakoda smiled slightly, his eyes looking down at him with pride and reassurance. "You don't need to prove anything to me. I'm already proud of you. And I've always known you're a great warrior."

"Really?" That was the kind of thing any parent would say. But Hakoda said it with such sincerity, Sokka believed it.

"Why do you think I trusted you to look after our tribe when I left?"

They walked across the beach and started up the ramp to the ship. Just then, they heard a sound which Sokka recognized as Appa's low growl. They turned and saw Appa descending; he landed on the beach before them. At the reins, Aang looked at Sokka with a worried expression.

Sokka's heart sank. "This can't be good news," he said, before going back down the ramp. Hakoda waited while Sokka conferred with an anxious Avatar Aang.

After a minute Sokka came back up to him, though Aang hung back near the sky bison. "What's wrong?" Hakoda askd.

Sokka's voice was hesitant and uncertain, voicing bad news. "It's Katara. Aang thinks she's in trouble. He's going back to Ba Sing Se." Sokka paused, and then looked up at Hakoda with resolve. "And I'm going with him."

"Do you need help?" If half of what Bato had told him about his children's adventures was true, he didn't even know the full scope of their powers and abilities.

"No, you need to lead this battle." Sokka gestured to the awaiting Water Tribe ships. "But I need to go and help Aang and Katara. That's where I'm needed."

Hakoda nodded in acceptance. He had once instructed Sokka to protect his sister. Now he could see how seriously Sokka took that responsibility. "Do what you have to do."

"Will I be able to find you here again?"

"Either here, or elsewhere in Chameleon Bay."

"If all goes well, I'll try to come back. If something happens—well, I'll know where to find you."

Hakoda embraced his son again. "Take care of yourselves," he said, looking over Sokka's head at the Avatar and his bison.

As he returned the hug, Sokka made a vow to himself, that this wasn't the same kind of good-bye they had made the last time they parted. They had found each other, and he wouldn't allow them to lose each other so permanently ever again.

* * *

><p>The Jasmine Dragon was empty of customers when night fell. Zuko helped Iroh clean up the shop, wiping down all the tables, with a somehow downcast expression on his face.<p>

"Are you all right? You worked hard today, so soon after your sickness."

"I'm not tired. I'm worried," Zuko said honestly. He looked over at his uncle. "If Katara could find us so easily, what does that say about our hiding place?"

"We're hidden in plain sight," Iroh reminded him. "She only recognized us because she knows us."

"But the fact that she found us … it seems like too much to be a coincidence," Zuko said, furrowing his good eyebrow.

"Then perhaps it could be destiny instead," Iroh suggested helpfully.

"Hmmph." Zuko grunted noncommittally and brought the pile of dishes over to the sink.

"Personally I'm glad we saw her again," Iroh said conversationally. "This has made me hopeful."

Zuko looked at him warily. "Hopeful about what?"

"Of seeing her more often—and in good circumstances!"

A somewhat strange thought entered Zuko's mind. "What if she brings her friends?"

"Well, I would be pleased to see Toph again."

"And the Avatar?" It wasn't a complete question; it was more like brushing against a topic that would have to be faced soon.

Iroh looked Zuko in the eye, and gave him an answer as obscure as his question. "You decide."

Zuko thought he understood what his uncle was getting at. If he acted like an enemy, the Avatar and his friends would act the same way toward him. But if he didn't, if he offered peace between them … What then?

"I'm speaking hypothetically, here. Do you think Katara and I … could ever have a normal relationship?" Zuko asked skeptically. For a moment, he tried to imagine it, going on a date with Katara, just as he had with Jin. What would they do? What could they talk about? What if they found they _didn't_ enjoy being with each other?

"Like any relationship, it would take time and effort, from both of you," Iroh said.

Zuko decided to voice a question that he had been carrying in his mind for quite some time—probably ever since he and Katara acknowledged having feelings for each other. "Is it selfish of me to want to continue hunting the Avatar?" Zuko asked. "Is it selfish of me to want to go home?"

"No, it's natural that you would want to go home," Iroh said carefully. "But if you put your own desires before another's needs, that is being selfish."

Zuko looked at the floor. He remembered Katara talking about how she wanted what was best for him, but needed to do what was best for the world. He had thought about her that way, weighing what would happen to her and her friends if he actually succeeded in capturing the Avatar.

Zuko's desire to go home was a strong constant. But his feelings for Katara were completely different; they were always present, but they flared up and died down intermittently. They were like a bonfire that glowed brilliantly at its height, and whose coals smoldered when the flames were gone; they only needed to be reignited to start the fire again.

Iroh looked sympathetically at his nephew. "Sooner or later, you will have to make a choice."

"I've already made it," Zuko said, with something like resignation. "I'm not going to get involved either way." Katara and the Avatar would eventually leave the city, but Zuko would stay with Iroh. Both sides in the war abhorred him, so he wouldn't do anything to help or hinder either of them.

Besides, today he had made Iroh happy by helping him run a teashop. Zuko could emulate him and make the best of things.

Iroh opened his mouth, about to say something, when a uniformed man entered the teashop. He walked up to Iroh and said, "A message from the royal palace." He bowed and handed a scroll to Iroh, who read it with a worried expression.

"I … I can't believe it," Iroh said in astonishment.

"What is it, Uncle?" Zuko asked.

"Great news!" Zuko was surprised at Iroh's sudden elation. Iroh announced, "We've been invited to serve tea to the Earth King!"

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I kind of got the idea for Aang's mindscape of Toph from various DeviantArt pieces that show her on the ground and him in the sky. The only two I can name are "If My Heart Had Wings" by xcgirl08, and "TTA - Dependent" by Rhinocio. Also worth mentioning is "Meeting at the Teahouse" by zarrah-chan.


	33. The Crossroads of Destiny

_Published November 20, 2012. Edited June 3, 2014._

"The Crossroads of Destiny"

* * *

><p>Suddenly he realized he was trapped, horribly trapped—everything he'd always wanted was in plain sight, and yet now he might not get it. Was he going to lose the best find he'd ever made, a find that might make up for all the things he'd lost? ~ Blue Balliett, <em>The Wright 3<em>

* * *

><p>For the rest of the night, Sokka and Aang took turns sleeping and steering while Appa flew them back to Ba Sing Se. They knew they would need their strength for whatever it was they were going to face; but neither of them slept very well. In the morning, Sokka tried to think ahead, to form some kind of outline for a plan.<p>

"So, what kind of trouble is Katara in?" Sokka asked apprehensively.

"I don't know," Aang admitted. "In my vision, I just knew she needed help."

"It would be nice if your Avatar powers could be just a little more specific from time to time."

Just then they heard a rumbling sound, akin to an avalanche or earthquake. Sokka looked down and pointed at the ground. "What is that?" Something was streaking across the plain, sending a cloud of dust up behind it.

Aang steered Appa lower, and couldn't help smiling, albeit confusedly, when he saw who it was. It was Toph, bending the earth beneath her as she ran.

"Need a ride?" Sokka called out.

Toph was startled, since she hadn't heard or felt them approach; she lost her footing and fell ungracefully on the ground, which still had momentum from her bending. Both Sokka and Aang cringed, hearing Toph hurt. Aang felt relieved when she stood up, uninjured. Appa landed next to Toph, who earthbent a pedestal up so she could climb aboard.

"Hey guys," she said casually, holding up a hand and smiling.

"Hey," Aang returned.

"What are you doing outside the city?" Sokka asked. "I thought you were seeing your mom."

Toph huffed in disgust. "That letter was a forgery. My mom was never in the city. Xin Fu and Master Yu were. They caught me in a metal box and tried to ship me back to Gaoling."

"What?" Aang was dismayed.

"How'd you get away?" Sokka asked.

To their slight surprise, Toph smiled at this. "That's the best part. You're not going to believe it. I figured out how to metalbend!"

Sokka and Aang both stared at her. "You're right, I don't believe it," Sokka said after a moment.

"I had a lot of time to think, and feel. I figured out that there were bits of earth still inside the metal. I could bend them enough to change the metal's shape."

"That makes sense," Aang said thoughtfully. "Guru Pathik said metal is just a part of earth that's been purified. You just saw past it, Toph."

"Maybe I could do it all along." Toph shrugged. "Guess I just never had the time to perfect it." She spread her arms proudly. "I'm telling you, this is going to revolutionize earthbending."

"Plus who-knows-how-many fields of application," Sokka said, thinking of machines and law enforcement and other practical uses of such an ability.

"So, why are you guys coming home now? I thought we weren't regrouping for a week."

The way the boys hesitated made her realize that something was wrong. It was Aang who supplied the grim answer. "I had a vision of Katara. I don't know what's happened, but it's something bad, and she needs our help."

Now it was Toph's turn to be skeptical. "I'm not sure how to ask this," she said. "But how the heck do you know this? Because you saw something that you weren't actually witnessing?"

Aang tilted his head back, trying not to be frustrated with Toph. He knew it was hard for her to understand. "It's not just seeing an image; it's feeling something in your gut, like … intuition, or insight." He looked back at his two friends sitting beside him. "Guru Pathik said that Appa was able to find us in Ba Sing Se, because his energy and mine are connected, or mixed—something like that. Maybe it's the same with Katara and me, and that's why I saw her."

Toph sat silently. She didn't know why hearing this bothered her. She already knew that Aang and Katara had a strong bond.

But … why hadn't he sensed when _she_ was in danger?

She had thought that they were pretty close. But if Aang's theory was true, it indicated that she wasn't as close to him as Katara was.

"I know, it's weird," Aang admitted. Then he looked up resolutely at the wall before them. "All I know is that Katara needs help, and we're the only ones who can give it."

* * *

><p>Katara paced around the perimeter of the cave that served as her prison. <em>The actual prison would have been just as efficient,<em> she mused, wondering what Azula's purpose was in keeping her here. Perhaps her intention was to lure Aang into a secluded place …

She heard the earth shift as the Dai Li opened their entrance to the catacomb. "You've got company," one of them informed her. Then someone tumbled down the diagonal slope, until he came to a stop in front of her.

"Zuko!"

He looked up in confusion, and saw Katara standing before him. "You, too?"

She came over and knelt down in front of him. "Are you okay?" She looked more concerned than surprised.

"I'm fine." The answer was almost automatic. Then, Katara surprised Zuko by hugging him. The surprise only lasted a moment before he returned the embrace. Katara was one of the few people he had ever hugged.

Katara pulled away to look at him, her hands resting on his arms."Where's Iroh?"

"He escaped," Zuko answered tonelessly.

"And he left you behind?" Katara looked incredulous.

"Not exactly," Zuko said reluctantly. "I didn't run when I had the chance. I figured it was time I faced Azula head-on." She had been hunting him for two months. If he didn't do something to settle it, once and for all—what if it went on indefinitely? Zuko couldn't live like that, in constant uncertainty tainted by fear. "But Azula didn't even try to fight; she just stood there and had these earthbenders capture me …."

"The Dai Li? So they _are_ following Azula now." That confirmed Katara's worst fear.

Zuko glanced around the cavern. "Where are your friends?" For the first time he wondered why she had been alone when he saw her the previous day.

Katara decided there was no point in keeping this from Zuko anymore. "Toph went to visit her mother; Aang left the city to meet someone, and Sokka went looking for our father. They were supposed to come back in a few days."

Zuko was shocked. "So you've been alone in the city?" No wonder Azula had been able to capture her. "Why didn't you say so?"

"I didn't think you needed to know." Katara shrugged, looking slightly embarrassed.

Zuko could sense an undertone, almost like a subtext. She hadn't told him, because she hadn't trusted him enough to tell him where her friends were and what they were planning.

"They had me in a different place before," Katara said, standing up and looking at their surroundings. "Why would they move us here? Any earthbender can find this place—they know that Aang and Toph can—"

"If they do, they'll be walking into a trap," Zuko spelled out.

"And we're the bait," Katara said bitterly.

"'We?'" Zuko repeated.

"Well, I don't expect Iroh to run away while you're still here. He'll come back for you, I'm sure."

Zuko wondered who would arrive first, Iroh or the teenagers. He wasn't sure what situation or events either arrival would cause.

"I guess we're stuck here," Katara finally concluded. She sat down, looking gloomy and frustrated. "I hate this. I hate having to wait around for someone else to come and rescue me from whoever's imprisoned me. First it was you, then it was Zhao, and now it's Azula."

Zuko grunted. "I guess now I know what that's like," he said regretfully. Then he frowned, his mind still on Azula. "How did they even find us?"

It wasn't Katara's silence that tipped him off; it was the way she tensed, almost flinching as she looked down. Zuko looked at her curiously. "Do you know what happened?"

"It was my fault," Katara confessed, almost whispering. "Azula and her friends were already at the palace when I came back. They were disguised as Kyoshi Warriors, our allies. I had just seen you and Iroh, and they were asking me why I was so nervous, and …"

Zuko stared at her, stunned. "You told them where we were?"

"It was a mistake!" she said desperately. "I thought they were allies, and that I could trust them to keep it secret—that you were here." She broke off, looking anguished. Then she looked back at him, blinking away tears. "I'm so sorry," she whispered.

Zuko didn't answer. He looked away, his expression hard.

"Say something!" Katara begged.

"There's always something," Zuko said bitterly, almost to himself.

"What?"

"I should have known. Though, I had a feeling something bad would happen, with you around. I did say, once, that you would be the death of me."

"Hey!" Katara was indignant. "Who helped you during the storm at sea? Who saved you in the blizzard at the North Pole? Who healed your uncle when he had a lightning injury?"

Hearing these debts flung at him made Zuko feel ashamed, which in turn made him angry. "You don't understand. While we were here, I actually thought we were safe. Everything was perfect. For the first time, things were going well for us."

Now Katara felt torn, hearing this. She had been genuinely happy for Iroh's success in opening a teashop, and grateful for Zuko's safety. After everything that each of them had gone through, the two firebenders deserved some peace and happiness.

But of course the rest of the world didn't see it that way. Zuko and Iroh were caught between the two sides of a war, and both sides seemed to spell trouble for them. And for them to ignore it, instead of trying to end it as Aang was … it seemed a little bit selfish.

"You can't just forget about all of this," Katara said. "You can't hide from the war. You—" She almost stopped, but then went on and informed him calmly, "You have to decide which side you're on."

She could almost feel the temperature in the cave warming. Zuko spoke up in a flat tone. "So if I'm not with you, I'm against you?"

Katara's gaze faltered. Then she looked away, a hint of a smile on her face. "That sounds like something Sokka would say." She sighed. "Iroh said we both have to learn to choose our battles." Katara's eyes flickered back up to him. "I chose my fight a long time ago. Now it's your turn."

Zuko made a sound in his throat, not exactly a scowl or a groan, more like a resentful acknowledgement. Then he spoke. "Would you be willing to fight with me? Would your friends? Would you all trust me?"

"I _do_ trust you—"

"Then why did you give us away?" Zuko cut in, his anger flaring up again. Katara broke off, looking confused and ashamed. "_I_ trusted _you_, Katara." He had trusted her enough to let her go about her business in the city, without worrying that she would betray their location to anyone. Katara knew she couldn't argue or even really justify what she had done.

For a long while they simply sat together, feeling sorry for themselves, and for each other.

* * *

><p>When Toph and the boys arrived back at the palace, the Earth King insisted that Katara was fine. Toph could tell that the Earth King believed what he said. Sokka was reassured, and almost expected to find Katara waiting to welcome them home with a hot meal.<p>

They flew the short distance from the palace to their apartment in the Upper Ring. Wooden scaffolding had been set up on the side of the house that Toph had demolished, the day before they found Appa.

Momo was in the living room, and flew right up to Aang. But the rest of the apartment was deserted. "There's no one else here," Toph informed them.

"Katara _is_ in trouble! I knew it!" Aang exclaimed.

"Oh no." Sokka's heart sank, as his excitement at seeing Suki again was replaced with worry for his sister.

Toph spoke up again. "Wait, someone's at the door." A moment later, they heard someone knocking; then Toph's face lit up in recognition. "It's that guy—Iroh!"

"Zuko's uncle?" Sokka exclaimed incredulously.

Toph walked to the door and slid it open. Sure enough, the elderly firebender was standing at their threshold, dressed in Earth Kingdom clothes. "Nice to see you again," Toph said cheerfully.

Iroh didn't look happy. "I need your help," he said.

Aang recovered from his surprise first. "What are you doing in Ba Sing Se?"

"Prince Zuko and I came here to hide," Iroh said. "But, as we just discovered, our cover has been blown."

"Why don't you come in?" Toph said, stepping aside.

Iroh entered, and when the door was closed, he turned to face the three teenagers. "Princess Azula is here in Ba Sing Se."

"She must have Katara," Aang realized.

"I was afraid of that," Iroh said unhappily. "She captured my nephew as well."

Aang set his jaw as he came to a conclusion. "Then we'll work together to fight Azula, and save Katara and Zuko."

Sokka looked at him, with the same doubtful expression he'd worn when Aang kicked Joo Dee out. "Okay, I may not be one to talk, but are we sure this is a good idea?"

"Katara is in trouble," Aang said simply. "All of Ba Sing Se is in trouble. Working together is our best chance," he reasoned.

It seemed as though that was always the case, in situations like this. They all knew that Sokka would do anything for his sister, even team up with the enemy. Sokka closed his eyes and nodded grudgingly.

Iroh spoke up. "I brought someone along who might be able to help us." The kids followed him outside, and found a surprising sight on the far end of their front porch: a bound and gagged Dai Li agent. Toph quickly earthbent two stone slabs up on either side of him, trapping him in place.

Once Iroh removed the cloth from his mouth, the earthbender wasted no time in telling them what he knew. "Azula and Long Feng are plotting a coup. They're going to overthrow the Earth King."

"My sister!" Sokka pointed his machete at the terrified agent. "Where are they keeping Katara?"

"In the Crystal Catacombs of old Ba Sing Se, deep beneath the Palace."

They left the man there; someone would find him eventually, and then he would face either Azula or Long Feng's wrath.

The four of them quickly made their way back to the palace grounds. Toph braced her feet against the earth, scoping the place out in search of the catacombs.

"See anything?" Aang looked at her hopefully.

Toph knelt down and placed one hand against the ground. "Well, what do you know?" she remarked, looking mildly impressed. "There _is_ an ancient city down there; but it's deep." She had never noticed it before, most likely because she hadn't been looking for it. Presently she earthbent a crater in the ground, the beginning of a tunnel. That was the beginning of their route to find their lost friend and enemy.

"We should split up," Sokka decided. "Aang, you go with Iroh to look for Katara and the angry jerk … no offense," he added, glancing at Iroh. Though he had no love for the old man, Sokka knew he owed him his respect.

"None taken," Iroh said easily.

"And I'll go with Toph to warn the Earth King about Azula's coup."

"Are you sure?" Aang looked worried. "The last time we split up—when we all went to do different things—Toph and Katara both ended up captured."

"We're running out of time," Toph said. "We have to act fast. Sticking together will slow us down. Aang, your earthbending's good enough to get to the Catacombs. You'll find Katara and Zuko." Her voice had no room for doubt.

Aang looked at her for a moment, before nodding. "Okay. Look out for each other." He looked to Sokka when he said this, tossing his head in Toph's direction, knowing that she couldn't see it.

Sokka nodded in agreement. "Find my sister."

"Hey." Toph placed a hand on Aang's shoulder. "Be careful, Twinkletoes."

Aang looked at her, and then put his hand over hers. "I will," he promised.

Toph and Sokka headed for the palace entrance, while Aang and Iroh made their way into the tunnel. Iroh kept a flame burning in his hand to light the way as Aang earthbent the tunnel deeper underground.

Aang took a stab at filling the potentially awkward silence. "So, Toph and Katara say you give good advice … and great tea."

Iroh smiled humbly. "The key to both is proper aging. What's on your mind?"

Aang hesitated, but then decided to admit what had been bothering him for the past day. "Well, I met this guru who was supposed to help me master the Avatar State and control this great power." Aang bowed his head sadly. "But to do it, I had to let go of the people I love … and I just couldn't."

"Perfection and power are overrated," Iroh said; he knew this from his experience as a prince and a general. "I think you were very wise to choose happiness and love." If only he had made such a choice, before Lu Ten died …

Aang was still worried. "What happens if we can't save everyone and beat Azula? Without the Avatar State … what if I'm not powerful enough?" He wasn't just thinking about this particular mission, he was also thinking of his much greater task, defeating the Fire Lord, essentially saving the entire world.

"I don't know the answer," Iroh said frankly. He didn't dare to give advice about things with which he was unfamiliar. But he could draw an optimistic analogy. "Sometimes life is like this dark tunnel. You can't always see the light at the end of the tunnel. But if you just keep moving …"

Aang shifted the earth in front of them, and this time found a wide space ahead, letting in light and a gust of wind that blew out Iroh's flame.

"… you will come to a better place."

* * *

><p>It was almost agonizing, being so physically close while staying so emotionally distant. Katara remembered the times she had missed Zuko while they were apart. She remembered the few times when they had tried to offer comfort to each other. Even now, Katara wanted to hug Zuko, or maybe just lean into him, sharing strength and concluding that it wasn't so bad if it meant they could spend time together.<p>

She took it as a good sign—maybe even an improvement in his character—that he hadn't lashed out and acted furious with her. But now, he acted as though they had nothing more to say to each other. Katara didn't like that. She didn't want to forget what they had in common.

She stood up and looked at Zuko, who currently had his back to her. "Look … I'm sorry I gave you away."

Zuko didn't answer, so Katara went on, trying to explain. "It's just, for so long whenever I pictured the face of the enemy … it was your face I saw." Zuko had always been much more real to her than the Fire Lord.

"My face," Zuko echoed, reaching up to touch his scar. "I see."

Katara realized that had come out wrong. "No, that's not what I meant …"

"It's okay," Zuko said quietly, standing up. "I used to think this scar marked me. The mark of the banished prince, cursed to chase the Avatar forever. But lately, I've realized I'm free to determine my own destiny, even if I'll never be free of my mark."

An idea formed in Katara's head. Actually, it had been there for some time, only now seemed like the best time and place to do it. Now she voiced her idea. "Maybe you could be free of it."

Zuko turned his head to look at Katara, who saw an unmistakable glimmer of hope in his eyes. "What?"

"I can try to heal your scar." Maybe that was a way for her to make it up to him, like a peace offering, proof of her apology.

Zuko looked away. "It's a scar. I've had it for three years. It can't be healed."

Katara reached under her shirt and pulled out the amulet that Master Pakku had given to her two months before, when she, Aang, and Sokka had departed from the North Pole to go to the Earth Kingdom. "This is water from the Spirit Oasis at the North Pole. It has special properties, so I've been saving it for something important." She walked over to Zuko, holding up the amulet between them. "I don't know if it would work, but …" She trailed off, looking uncertain.

Zuko stared at her for a moment. After everything he had done to her, Katara still trusted him at least a little bit. She cared about him, enough to use something so precious for him.

Zuko closed his eyes, silently accepting her offer. Katara reached out and gently touched his scar, examining it. Zuko realized he had never let anyone else touch his scar before, at least since those physicians back when he'd first received the scar. Her touch was gentle, almost reassuring.

Before Katara could do anything, the ground shook in a way that Zuko and Katara recognized as the work of an earthbender; but it was coming from the end of the cavern opposite of where the Dai Li had come. She pulled her hand away and they turned to look as the earthen wall collapsed; then Aang burst into the cave, accompanied by Iroh.

"Uncle?" Zuko was dumbstruck, seeing who was with him.

"Aang!" Ecstatic and relieved, Katara ran up and embraced the Avatar. He smiled and hugged her back, but then glared at Zuko while still holding Katara; apparently he was still suspicious and distrustful of him. Iroh ran up to Zuko and hugged him around the shoulders. Zuko glared back at the Avatar.

"Aang, I knew you would come," Katara said, releasing Aang. Zuko could see the joy and relief in her expression; she'd really had her hopes hinged on that boy. Seeing her hug him so fiercely made Zuko's stomach twist. She had never looked so happy upon seeing Zuko.

It wasn't jealousy he was feeling; it was the realization that she would never care for him as much as he had once hoped she would.

Zuko looked at Iroh. "Uncle, I don't understand. What are you doing with the Avatar?"

"Saving you, that's what," Aang retorted.

Zuko snarled at Aang and started to lunge at him, but Iroh grabbed Zuko's arm, holding him back. Iroh spoke gently but firmly. "Zuko, it's time we talked." He turned to Aang and Katara. "Go help your other friends. We'll catch up with you."

Aang clasped his hands and bowed respectfully to Iroh before running back through the tunnel. Katara slowly followed after him, glancing over her shoulder at Zuko. Their eyes met briefly.

He thought she looked sad.

She thought he looked troubled.

Finally Katara broke the connection and followed Aang down the tunnel, leaving Zuko behind—again.

Zuko turned away from Iroh. "Why, Uncle?"

Iroh's voice was serious. "You are not the man you used to be, Zuko. You are stronger and wiser and freer than you have ever been. And now you have come to the crossroads of your destiny," he informed him. Zuko was mildly surprised by the conviction with which Iroh spoke. "It's time for you to choose. It's time for you to choose good."

Zuko shut his eyes, trying to absorb his uncle's weighty words. So Iroh _did_ want him to join the Avatar. Zuko had wondered as Iroh dropped hints throughout their two months as fugitives, but only now had Iroh come out and said that Zuko had to make a decision. But then, he'd known for a long time that he would have to choose—ever since that night he kissed Katara.

Suddenly, the two firebenders were startled by a violent quake. A trail of crystals shot out of the ground until they reached Iroh, pinning him against the wall of the catacomb. As Zuko got into a defensive position, Azula and two Dai Li agents slid down from the tunnel at the near end of the catacomb.

Azula approached Zuko. "I expected this kind of treachery from Uncle, but Zuko, _Prince_ Zuko … you're a lot of things, but you're not a traitor, are you?"

Zuko glared at Azula. He had no time for her games. "Release him immediately!"

"It's not too late for you, Zuko," Azula said. "You can still redeem yourself."

Zuko stared at his sister. What was she doing? Offering him a chance to join her? Something wasn't right about that—Zuko knew Azula well enough to know that she would never offer anything unless there was something in it for her.

Iroh spoke up. "The kind of redemption she offers is not for you."

It was just as it had been in one of Zuko's nightmares, when he had fallen sick. Two dragons offering him different advice—exactly as Azula and Iroh were doing now. Katara had been in one of the dreams, too, Zuko suddenly remembered; but he didn't know what her role had been.

"Why don't you let _him_ decide, Uncle?" Azula looked at Zuko with an expression of sincere pleading. "I need you, Zuko. I've plotted every move of this day. This glorious day in Fire Nation history. And the only way we win is together."

So that was why Azula wanted his help. The Avatar could defeat her alone, or Zuko alone, but the two of them together might stand a chance.

It had been a long time since anyone said that they needed him. Katara had made it clear that she didn't need him; she was too adaptable and independent; she could get along, even be happy, without him.

"At the end of this day, you will have your honor back. You will have your father's love. You will have everything you want."

"Zuko, I am begging you," Iroh said, and Zuko had never heard such concern in his voice. "Look into your heart and see what it is that you truly want."

Zuko looked back at Iroh, unsure of whom to listen to. He shut his eyes and bowed his head, trying to come to a decision.

"You are free to choose," Azula told him solemnly. She waved a hand to the Dai Li agents, signaling them to leave. They earthbent a stone cube under their feet and slid back up the ramp. Azula departed through the tunnel Aang and Katara had gone through.

Zuko didn't chase after her; nor did he try to free Iroh. He had to think—but he knew he had precious little time to do so.

If he sided with Katara and the Avatar … the past three years would all have been a waste. He wouldn't just be a banished prince or a fugitive: Everyone in the Fire Nation would know him as a traitor.

For a moment Zuko seriously thought about what it would be like if he joined the Avatar and his friends. Their traveling lifestyle wasn't that different from what his had been as a fugitive. Zuko hated it. He wanted to go home—and now he was getting his chance. Now might be his last opportunity to capture the Avatar, to redeem himself, to go home. That was what he wanted.

And even if Zuko joined the Avatar, what good would it do? Azula was already in the process of taking over Ba Sing Se. Even if Zuko, Iroh, Katara and the others all escaped with their lives, they most likely weren't going to be able to save the city. Wouldn't it make more sense to join the side that was winning?

_"If you try to capture Aang, I won't hesitate to attack you."_

_"If nothing's changed for you, then nothing's changed for me_."

It worked the other way, too. If they fought against his country and treated him like an enemy, he would do the same for them.

* * *

><p>Katara didn't know what Zuko and Iroh were going to do. Iroh had said that he needed to "talk" with Zuko, and that they would catch up with Aang and Katara. Was it possible—dare she hope—that Zuko and Iroh would join them?<p>

She tried not to think about it, lest she get her hopes up and allow herself to be distracted. They had to focus on the problem at hand.

"We've got to find Sokka and Toph," Katara said as she and Aang ran across the enormous cavern. Suddenly, though not so surprisingly, they heard and felt a rush of fire coming up behind them; Aang reacted by earthbending a stone wall to shield them.

Azula had followed them into the cavern.

The two friends realized, at the same time, that they weren't going to escape without a fight.

The canals seemed like a gift from the spirits, enabling Katara to defend herself and help Aang face Azula. She and Aang moved in sync to extinguish the flames that she sent toward them. Then Aang demonstrated his earthbending and destroyed the large column on which Azula stood; she was forced to leap down, landing in between Katara and Aang. The princess looked genuinely nervous as she looked between her opponents, waiting for one of them to make the next move.

Neither of them did. A fourth contender entered the fray, spewing red fire between Aang and Azula.

It was Zuko, standing ready, poised to strike again—but at whom? There was a long, tense moment when he might have wavered, looking between Azula's harsh glare and Aang's blank expression. Strangely, the airbender did not look scared, only worried, and maybe even … concerned. Across the cavern, Katara held her breath, not knowing what action Zuko was going to take.

Suddenly Zuko punched forward, shooting a fireball at the Avatar. Aang barely had time to register Zuko's actions; but his body knew instinctively to defend and attack against his opponent.

Azula smiled at Zuko's decision and turned her attention back to attacking the waterbender. After that Katara could only catch glimpses of Zuko and Aang fighting, while she focused on battling the Fire Nation princess. She was aware that Aang was using earth and air more, leaving the water for her to use.

For a long moment it seemed that Katara had the upper hand. Azula was knocked to her knees, and as she started to get up, Katara drew the water up onto her body, going into the octopus stance, waving two long tentacles of water before her. When Azula started to lash out a fire blast, Katara caught her arm, and then her leg, swirling the water around the girl's limbs. Azula cried out in something that might have been fear, as the waterbender lifted her into the air. She had her—

And then Zuko leapt to his sister's defense, cutting Katara's water whips with his own fire whips. Azula found her footing again, and then turned to look at Aang, who was climbing out from a pile of rubble a short distance away. Katara couldn't go to help him, as Zuko now focused his attack on her. They were on opposite sides of the canal, but they threw long strands of fire and water at each other, the two elements clashing in the air halfway between them.

"I thought you had _changed_!" Katara said furiously. For a moment, she had even dared to hope that Zuko's loyalties had changed—that they might not have to say good-bye that time.

Katara swung her water down at him. Zuko's tendrils of fire and Katara's tentacles of water clashed together over the channel, equal in strength.

"I _have_ changed," Zuko said flatly, before sending another blast at her. Katara blocked it and paused for a moment, poising her water-weapons low to the ground.

Zuko waited for her to make the next move. The expression on her face was one he had seen before. _You're a horrible person. Spreading war and violence and hatred is in your blood_.

"I was wrong about you," Katara said vehemently. "You'll never change."

Zuko ground his teeth and lashed out at her again.

That exchange was the only evidence that they had had any contact before the battle. Neither of them let their emotions get in the way; they both fought fiercely. But as Katara counterattacked, Azula suddenly reappeared, having stunned Aang long enough to focus on the waterbender. Katara tried to defend herself, but repeated fire blasts from both of the siblings were too much. Zuko's red arc and Azula's blue comet hit her water shield hard; Katara was blown backward into a cluster of crystals. She collapsed onto the ground.

Her hair had come undone; in the back of his mind—some part of his consciousness that had trivial thoughts even during a battle—Zuko recalled only one other time when he'd seen Katara with her hair down. That had been during another duel, the first time the two of them had fought each other directly.

In a way, they were back to what they had been at the beginning.

When Katara managed to push herself back up, she saw that it wasn't just the four teenagers in the cavern: rows and rows of Dai Li agents had arrived, ready to follow Azula's orders.

On the other side of the channel, Aang picked himself up and got into a fighting stance. He saw Katara surrounded by a small group of Dai Li, and dozens more before him. Katara bent the water around herself, ready to continue fighting; but Aang had a horrible sinking feeling that it was futile.

"There's too many," Aang realized. This was the kind of situation where he would need the Avatar State.

Guru Pathik's voice echoed in his memory. _The only way, is to let her go._

Aang grimaced, feeling sad and defeated. "I'm sorry, Toph."

He turned around and earthbended a small tent of crystals around himself, buying a moment of protection for him to sit down and meditate. He let go of his feelings of disappointment and desire, surrendering himself to the energy that he knew existed in the cosmos.

Zuko and the Dai Li waited, apprehensive and a little frightened, wondering what the Avatar could be doing. Suddenly the crystal tent exploded. Aang started to rise up in the air on a column of light; his eyes and arrows glowed with more intensity than any any other time when he'd entered the Avatar State.

This was it, the moment when he would prove to his enemies how powerful he was, the point in the battle when the tide turned …

Suddenly a bolt of lightning struck Aang's body; he writhed in midair as the electricity entered his back and exited through his foot. He'd never felt so much physical pain and shock; at the same time his spiritual subconscious was aware that everything—the control, the cosmic energy—was fading, and then he was falling, physically and metaphysically.

Katara had never been so horrified in her life. Tears rolled down her face as she stared up at Aang. By the time he started to fall, she had recovered her senses enough to turn her body and bend the water around her. She created a small tsunami, riding on top of it towards Aang, arms spread behind her. The wave pushed Zuko and the Dai Li out of the way; when they stood again, they saw that Katara had caught the fallen Avatar. Zuko had never seen Katara look so utterly hopeless before.

_I can't do this, I can't defend Aang as well as myself, I need Aang's help … anyone's …_ but she knew she would receive no such help from Zuko, seeing him and Azula advancing on her.

Just then, a fire blast hit the ground before her. Katara instinctively bent over Aang's body to shield him; but then she realized that the fire wasn't coming from their attackers.

When the fire died, she saw Iroh jumping down from a crystal cliff to land between Katara and her attackers. He stood in a battle stance, ready to defend Katara and Aang.

He looked over his shoulder at her. "You've got to get out of here! I'll hold them off as long as I can!" Iroh punched left and right, blasting fire at any potential attackers.

Katara carried Aang to the waterfall and stood at its base. "Iroh!" Katara shouted, not wanting to leave their savior behind.

"GO!"

"Thank you!" It was all she had time to say before she bended the water around her, forming a current that and twisted and rose upward, lifting them back to the surface, out of the catacombs.

Seeing that Katara and the Avatar were out of danger, Iroh stopped attacking and quietly surrendered. Two Dai Li agents bended a ring of crystals around him.

Zuko stared blankly at his uncle. Iroh looked back at his nephew for a moment and then turned his head down sadly. He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. Bitter disappointment was written all over his face.

* * *

><p>Sokka and Toph had arrived at the palace in time to witness the Council of Five being captured by the Dai Li. They rushed to find the Earth King, and for a moment Sokka thought they could make it out safely, when he saw two of the Kyoshi Warriors with Kuei.<p>

Then Ty Lee gave herself away, by not knowing who Suki was.

"They're not the real Kyoshi Warriors!" Toph denounced.

Mai stood up, smirking. "Sorry to disappoint you."

A fight started to break out, but they were forced to surrender when Azula threatened the Earth King himself. Then Toph finally discovered what it was like to have her chi blocked by the elusive circus girl. The two non-bending Fire Nation girls brought them to the official prison, which apparently was now controlled by the Dai Li. Long Feng had been released from this place, and was probably working alongside Azula as well.

"Don't worry," Toph whispered, after the Dai Li had closed the door to their cramped prison cell. "I can metalbend us out of here."

Sokka no longer doubted it. "Okay … we're counting on you."

They waited a short while, watching for the earthbender guards who pass by every so often. Sokka thought ruefully that it would have been convenient for them if the members of the Council of Five were also being held here, but apparently they were under house arrest instead. Azula was clever, keeping the various undesirables in different prisons.

"See any Dai Li agents nearby?" Toph asked finally.

"Nope," Sokka confirmed, looking out the small barred window. "The coast is clear."

Toph flexed her hands and then grabbed the metal door before them. Sokka and Earth King Kuei watched in awe as she pushed the metal inward, making a hideous screech as dents formed in it. Then she pushed the door out into the hall, and wasted no time running out.

"Come on!" Sokka pulled Kuei behind him.

"I am not leaving without Bosco!"

"We don't have time!"

"It could be his Appa," Toph pointed out. "You know how people are about their pets."

This led to a short detour back to the palace, where Ty Lee and Mai were hanging out in the throne room. Azula and the Dai Li were nowhere in sight. Toph used earthbending to immobilize Ty Lee in a compromising gymnastics pose.

Strangely, Mai didn't even try to fight. "Just take the bear," she said carelessly.

As the group exited the throne room, something happened that made Toph stop short.

She heard a sound, someone speaking, and she could hear it even though physically the speaker wasn't even in earshot.

_I'm sorry, Toph_.

She knew, at that moment, that something had happened—something she should feel bad about, except that good would come of it—

And then it was gone, replaced by a feeling of panic, despair, and a strange sensation of falling. The only thing she could compare it to was such a moment when, half-asleep or on the verge of falling asleep, she suddenly jerked awake.

"Aang is in trouble!" Toph exclaimed.

"What?" Sokka was startled, and looked at her strangely. "Are you having weird visions too? I thought it was just Avatar stuff."

"This is no joke! We have to find him—them!" Toph led them as they down the corridor.

Sokka panted as he tried to keep up with her. "You know, when we lost Appa and Momo in a swamp, Aang was able to find them somehow. Is this like that?"

"How should I know?" Toph said, sounding annoyed now.

Toph had never been very spiritual; she believed in what was tangible, and didn't bother herself with Aang's spiritual mumbo-jumbo. But now—she knew instinctively what she had to do, as though some force was urging her onward.

They exited the palace, and Toph earthbent a platform that took them quickly down the steps.

Sokka spotted the crater that Toph had made, leading down to the Catacombs. "This is where we left them."

Toph bent down and pressed her hand against the ground. "I think I feel them … but they're not taking the same route as before." She stood and moved her arms away from each other, forming a new hole in the ground. A moment later, Katara rose up on a spout of water.

"Katara!" Sokka exclaimed, his relief returning to anxiety when he saw Aang. "Oh, no …"

Toph couldn't see what was concerning Sokka, but she could feel something strange through the earth: Katara seemed to be carrying Aang's weight. "What happened to Aang?" Toph demanded.

"A-Azula shot him with lightning," Katara said, her voice trembling. "Iroh … said he'd hold them off … I don't know if Aang …'" She gasped, trying to keep calm. She needed to hold it together. She had work to do.

"Come on," Sokka said, running over to Appa. "We have to get out of here." They all climbed up Appa's tail; Kuei had to coax Bosco into coming onto the large animal. Katara carried Aang to Appa's head. "Yip-yip!" Sokka ordered, slapping a hand against the bison's fur. Appa leapt into the air immediately.

Katara knelt down and sat Aang up against Appa's neck. Toph wanted to go down to Aang, to see if she could feel his heartbeat, but some innate fear held her back.

"Can't you heal him?" Toph asked.

"Will you hush?" Sokka said sharply, lowering his voice.

Toph was startled, almost to the point of crying. Everyone was silent now, waiting for something, only Toph couldn't see or feel what it was.

Was this how Smellerbee and Longshot had felt, when they knew that Jet was …

_No, you are NOT dying on us!_

Sokka spoke, just loud enough for Toph and Kuei to hear. "The spirit water," Sokka murmured, sounding awed. "I forgot about that stuff … It's something Katara's waterbending master gave her. She's trying to heal him with it."

Toph was silent; she knew they were all waiting. She heard Katara utter a small, strange, despairing noise; it made Toph's chest size up in fear. Then, she heard a groan—Aang's voice.

He was alive.

Toph wiped her eyes with her knuckles; her breathing came out as a shudder, though she knew that now she should be relieved.

"Hey." She felt Sokka's hand on her shoulder. "It's okay. We made it out. We're together."

But not everyone was all right. Iroh had been captured, and would most likely be imprisoned, if he was lucky. Azula had taken control of Ba Sing Se. And Aang …

"Katara." Toph's voice was strangled with emotion. She crawled over, clinging to each tuft of Appa's fur that she used as a grip. "Let me see him."

Katara said nothing, but sat back as Toph slid down Appa's neck and felt her way over to Aang's still unconscious body. The earthbender's hands found his shoulders, and could feel skin where his clothing had been blasted off. Toph moved her right hand to his chest. There it was; his heart was beating, and she could feel his involuntary movements as he breathed, still clinging to life.

"You're okay," Toph whispered. "You're gonna be okay." She meant for it to sound fierce, but it came out sounding like a plea.

The dethroned Earth King, Kuei, looked back at the city they were leaving behind. "The Earth Kingdom … has fallen." He had thought that his lowest point was discovering that he had been ignorant of a war; but even when he had thought that he was setting things right, that he had learned his lesson, he had been duped yet again. And now the Earth Kingdom was paying for it.

Katara looked down sadly at Aang, and then up at the expansive land that lay before them. Toph clutched Aang's hand, so hard that she could feel the blood pumping under his skin. She didn't let go.

* * *

><p>"We've done it Zuko." Azula seemed right at home on the Earth King's throne. "It's taken a hundred years, but the Fire Nation has conquered Ba Sing Se."<p>

When Zuko spoke, his voice was full of regret. "I betrayed Uncle."

"No, he betrayed you. Zuko, when you return home, Father will welcome you as a war hero."

"But I don't have the Avatar. What if Father doesn't restore my honor?"

Azula stood up and placed a hand reassuringly on Zuko's shoulder. Zuko looked sadly at his sister.

"He doesn't need to, Zuko. Today, you restored your own honor."

Zuko turned away from Azula and looked down pensively, his thoughts churning like the ocean that so reminded him of Katara. Her last words to him rang in his ear: _You'll never change._

When he closed his eyes, he saw Katara's face with different expressions that he'd seen that evening. The harsh glare of anger, pain, and what might have been hatred. The hopeful, confident, almost tender gaze as the world's last airbender went into the Avatar State. The tear-stained look of horror and despair when the Avatar fell. The last, haunting glance she'd given him as she left the catacomb—sympathetic, wistful, sorrowful, and maybe even hopeful.

In the past, Zuko had thought that when he found out he could return home, he would be ecstatic. But now he was the exact opposite. He felt none of Azula's triumph; he was confused about what had just happened, and apprehensive about what was to come.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> As I re-watched the "Crossroads of Destiny" episode, I actually blinked back tears at the end. It's so intense, and everything happens so quickly … I hope I did it justice.

When I saw _Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back_, I could hardly believe how similar Luke's choice was to Aang's, when he sensed his friends in danger and left behind a teacher in order to save them. Michael Konietzko and Bryan DiMartino had to know how similar their scene was to George Lucas'. I decided to take it a step further; and so Toph's vision of Aang is inspired by Leia later sensing where Luke was when he needed help.


	34. The Awakening

_Published December 26, 2012. Edited March 26, 2013._

**Author's Note:** I found a virtual copy of the Avatar comics, _The Lost Adventures_, on a website called MangaEden, and Chapter 14, "The Bridge," details what happened while Aang was unconscious. I feel like they're only half considered canon (Zuko's angry decision in Chapter 13, for example, seems completely out-of-character; and they make it seem like the Southern Water Tribe fleet has its own waterbenders, which they don't because Katara is the only one from their tribe). Nevertheless, I decided to rewrite part of this chapter to go along with the account described in the comics, just to give a better sense of pacing and excitement.

* * *

><p>"The Awakening"<p>

There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love.  
>~ Martin Luther King, Jr., <em>Letter from Birmingham Jail<em>

It was Sokka who decided what to do, where to go. He took the reins and steered Appa back to Chameleon Bay. It was mid-morning when they spotted the Water Tribe boats on the water. They could hear shouts of excitement as Appa descended and then dropped down next to the lead boat, floating on the water's surface.

Sokka spotted Bato and Hakoda on the deck, and waved to them. "Dad!"

"Sokka!" Hakoda stopped short when he saw Sokka's downcast face. "What's wrong? Where's Katara?"

"Here." He saw her stand up on the sky bison. She was holding an unconscious boy in her arms.

This wasn't how Katara had wanted to be reunited with her father. Maybe it was silly, but she didn't want him to see her like this—defeated, exhausted, her hair down and disheveled, her skirt burned and torn. She had wanted to introduce Aang, the person who would help them; not hold him unconscious in her arms and say, "We need help."

Sokka made some quick introductions and explained their predicament, trying to sum up the main points. Ba Sing Se had fallen, and with it, the entire Earth Kingdom. Aang had almost been killed and was still in critical condition. They had nowhere to go; the Earth Kingdom would now be just as dangerous for them as the Fire Nation.

Bato ushered the newcomers onto the boats, and showed the four teenagers the berthing room belowdecks. Katara carried Aang, holding him close against her. Sokka led Toph, who was almost asleep on her feet; she hadn't slept since before she was kidnapped, two or three days ago. Toph didn't want to sleep in a hammock, suspended in the air without any sense of moving vibrations, so she settled on a blanket on the wooden floor.

"Wake me up when Aang comes to," Toph said sleepily. She was asleep in less than a minute.

Katara was exhausted, too, but she forced herself to take care of Aang first. Hakoda brought some water she could use to continue healing Aang.

She could feel her father's eyes on her, concerned. "Are you all right?"

"I don't know." Katara looked away, back at Aang's unconscious form. She _would_ be okay, if she knew he would be all right.

She felt his hand on her shoulder. "Katara? I know I shouldn't be, considering what happened, but even so—I'm glad to see you again."

Katara looked at him, blinking back tears that had more to do with her exhaustion than with this reunion. Hakoda hugged her, and she hugged him back, but it didn't bring as much comfort or conviction as she might have expected.

Some part of her wished it were Zuko hugging her, comforting her. He had willingly embraced her, on his ship, at the North Pole, and in the Catacombs.

"It'll be okay."

Katara felt her heart ache for—she had lost count of how many times that night, or morning. She was glad to be with her father again, but he couldn't just tell her that things would be all right and expect her to believe him. She had seen and done so much in the past two years, so many things he didn't know about. Hakoda had missed some of the most crucial years of her life, the time when she was figuring out who she was. She was almost a stranger to him now.

Katara didn't tell him that she felt this way, because she knew it shouldn't matter that much. She understood his reasons for leaving, just as Gran-Gran understood her reasons for leaving to help Aang. She also wanted him to see she was mature enough to deal with her emotions and accept the situation.

Katara could remember the time when she and Zuko had a fight about feelings, and she cried in her room afterwards. She had missed her family so much at that moment; she even wished that Hakoda were there to talk to. Now he was here, and she could barely tell him about any of the things she had been through. It was too painful for her, and anyway, it now seemed irrelevant—why did he have to know that she had almost had a romance with the Fire Lord's son? All it would do was worry him.

Sokka didn't tell Hakoda anything about Zuko; he knew it was Katara's business, and he seemed to think that she would tell him in her own time. But he did go to Katara, while she was watching over a sleeping Aang.

"Katara … I'm kind of afraid to ask, but … what happened to Zuko?"

He knew it was bad from the way her face clouded, like a storm threatening to release overwhelming rain and lightning and thunder. "He's probably heading back to the Fire Nation."

Sokka frowned. "As their prisoner?"

"No; as their prince." Katara closed her eyes in anguish. "I was so stupid … I thought he might help us, but … he turned on Aang and me, and fought with Azula and the Dai Li."

"The same people who captured him?" Sokka was surprised, and even a little indignant.

"He just stood by while Azula …" She broke off, looking to Aang and then letting her tears overflow. What had made her think that he could go against his sister to join their losing battle? The fact that he let her touch his scar …

"I was so stupid, Sokka. I actually thought he might fight with us …"

"Well, I might have thought so too. After he was captured, Iroh came to _us_ asking for help."

"He did?" Katara was surprised; then her expression returned to anger. "Then Zuko should have stood by him." She stopped, and then looked away regretfully. "Iroh stood by us, and we left him behind …"

"He must have known what he was doing. I can't forget how he fought at the North Pole. Who knows? Maybe he got away."

Katara didn't look convinced or reassured. Sokka sighed. "Look, we're together again—our team, and our family—and we've done everything we can do right now. So I'm gonna get some rest. You should too."

Katara obeyed, climbing into a hammock and giving herself up to sleep. The last thing she saw before closing her eyes was Toph sleeping on the mat next to Aang's.

* * *

><p>Toph wasn't happy on the Water Tribe boat. She had no contact with either earth or metal, which meant her sense of sight was severely limited. And then there was the seasickness. She had never been at sea before, and feeling the motion of the water without being able to see around her made her almost constantly nauseous.<p>

She was also impatient for Aang to wake up. Granted, she slept longer than Katara and Sokka, having been awake for more days straight than they had; and she knew that Aang needed to regain his strength after Azula hurt him; but she figured it would be only a day or two—maybe three tops—before he woke up, disoriented but still glad to see them.

But no matter how many times Katara worked to heal him or Toph tried to shake him awake, Aang stayed unconscious. Slowly Toph realized that it might be a long time now before he woke up.

The three teenage friends took turns staying with Aang. When it became apparent that he was in a kind of coma, and might not wake up for a while yet, Sokka withdrew a bit and spent more time talking with Hakoda and Bato. So Katara and Toph took it upon themselves to watch over him.

It was harder for Toph, who wasn't able to simply watch Aang. When she sat on a mat next to his bed, she felt tempted to touch him, to make sure that his heart was beating, that his lungs were breathing, that he was still there.

_"You really do care, don't you?"_

"You have to wake up, Aang," Toph said. "We need you to get better. I'm counting on you, Katara and Sokka are counting on you … the whole world is counting on you." The tears came defiantly; her eyes, which couldn't see, could still cry.

Toph felt Katara enter the room and come up behind her. She placed a comforting hand on Toph's shoulder. "He'll be okay," Katara assured her. "He's strong. Just like his earthbending teacher."

But Toph didn't feel strong now. "If Aang dies … I don't know what I'll do." Toph's voice broke. "I can't go back to Gaoling; if the Earth Kingdom has fallen then the Fire Nation has probably taken over there too …"

Katara put her arms around the girl. "You'll always have a place with us, Toph," she promised. "We'll take care—I mean, we're here for you if you need us." She knew Toph didn't like the idea of people having to take care of her.

Toph sniffed and gave a watery smile. "Thanks Katara."

"You should get some rest. I'll stay with Aang."

Toph stood and turned to the door. Then she hesitated and turned back to face Katara. "Thank you for saving him."

Katara sounded surprised. "I … you don't have to thank me."

"Someone should. Aang almost died in the Avatar State. I … when we escaped on Appa, I couldn't feel a heartbeat. But you brought him back to life; you prevented the Avatar Cycle from ending. You saved the world … and you saved my friend. So thank you."

"You're welcome." Katara paused. "I was wondering … Sokka said you somehow knew where to find us—and that Aang was in trouble. I've been meaning to ask you about that."

Toph frowned. She had wondered about it, too, though she didn't like to dwell on it, because … she just didn't understand it. "I don't know how to explain it. Maybe it was intuition … although, there was a second when I thought I heard Aang speak. I don't know …"

Katara studied the girl, looking thoughtful. "You know, Aang first saw you in a vision. Maybe what happened was, you had a vision of him."

Toph frowned. She remembered Aang telling her about that; she hadn't entirely understood it. "Isn't vision the same thing as sight? Because I didn't see him."

"But you heard him, and somehow you knew he was in danger. It was like—a premonition." Katara smiled slightly and shook her head. "My point is, if I'm right, you helped save Aang, too. And you yourself busted Sokka and the Earth King out of prison. So, thank you."

"You're welcome." Toph left the room with a smile on her face.

* * *

><p>The following weeks were strange and drawn-out, though not lacking some excitement.<p>

While they were in a port, Earth King Kuei informed them that he had made a decision. "I don't think I'll be of much help anymore," he confessed. "I tried to help, and I ended up letting my city be taken. I don't want to cause problems with your plans again."

"Then where will you go?" Toph asked.

The Earth King looked out at the expanse of dark soil. "I think it's time I saw what this kingdom is really like."

Sokka nodded. If Kuei had a look at the Earth Kingdom and its people, it would help him better understand them if he ever regained his throne. "If and when we free the Earth Kingdom, we'll let you know."

So Kuei obtained some civilian clothing, and set off with Bosco as his companion, to travel the Earth Kingdom incognito.

While the Water Tribesmen were catching fish to replenish their food stores, Toph picked up some new vibrations. "I think someone's sneaking around," she informed Sokka and Hakoda.

"Where is he now?" Sokka asked, pulling out his boomerang.

"It's two people—one big, one small—they're going near our ship."

The three teens and Hakoda hurried back to their ship, and after searching one side, found a stout man trying to push a small boy up and over the railing to the ship.

"Drop your accomplice!" Sokka called out.

The larger perpetrator obliged, dropping his partner in crime into the water and sand. The boy's oversized helmet fell off. "Sorry, The Duke," the fellow said—Katara couldn't tell if he was a man or a teenager.

Sokka stopped short. "Wait a second—Pipsqueak?"

The large man blinked, peering at him. "Sokka?" he finally managed to say.

"You know these guys?" Katara said.

"The big guy is Pipsqueak, and they call this kid The Duke. They're Freedom Fighters—friends of Jet's."

The term "Freedom Fighters" intrigued the Water Tribe warriors, while the credential of being Jet's friends seemed to immediately win Katara and Toph's acceptance.

It was Katara who took the liberty of giving each of them some food and fresh water, and no one tried to stop her. "You could have just asked for some," she said, pointed but gentle. "You didn't have to try to steal it."

The little boy, The Duke, looked at her as though studying her. "Are you Sokka's sister, who got kidnapped by the Fire Nation?"

"Yeah—that's right."

"Where's Aang?" Pipsqueak asked between mouthfuls of food. "The Avatar?"

"He's asleep," Toph said, sparing Katara from telling the whole painful truth. "He … he got hurt in a battle in Ba Sing Se."

"By the way," Sokka said, joining their circle, "we saw some friends of yours there: Jet, Smellerbee and Longshot."

"You saw them?" The Duke exclaimed incredulously.

"So they did make it to the city," Pipsqueak said happily. "They said they were going to, when the gang split up. How are they?"

They could tell something was wrong by the way the three teenagers lowered their eyes. "Smellerbee and Longshot are probably still alive," Sokka said. "But Jet got hurt—badly—we think he must have died."

Katara stood to put away the food supplies while Sokka filled them in on the full details of Jet's final battle. What shocked them most was the fact that Jet had been killed, not by a firebender, but by an earthbender.

"Is that like civil war?" Pipsqueak asked, looking confused.

"No. It's not like that," Katara said bitterly when she rejoined them. "The Dai Li don't care who has power, as long as they have their share."

Sokka looked thoughtful and somewhat frustrated. "We should have looked for Longshot and Smellerbee afterwards; they could have come with us, and might've helped with …" He stopped. None of them had mentioned the invasion plan since they left Ba Sing Se.

"With what?" Pipsqueak asked.

Sokka glanced sideways. "Can I trust you guys? I haven't forgotten how you and Smellerbee tied me up and took me for a walk like some pet."

Toph let out an involuntary laugh at this.

"I'm sorry about that," Pipsqueak said.

Sokka nodded, apparently deciding to let them in. "We've been planning an invasion of the Fire Nation capitol city, in less than three months. How would you guys like to help us with that?"

"Yes!" Pipsqueak pumped an enormous fist into the air.

Hakoda had been passing by, and heard the last part of their conversation. "Sokka," he interrupted quietly. "May I have a word?"

Sokka stood and followed his father over to the railing of the battered Water Tribe boat. "Is everything okay?" Sokka asked. "Wait, that was a stupid question; there's a lot of things that aren't okay …"

"I know what you mean," Hakoda said gently. "What I wanted to discuss is this invasion plan of yours."

"Me too. This just gave me an idea: if we don't have the Earth King or the army, we can stage a smaller invasion," Sokka reasoned. "We know a lot of people in the Earth Kingdom. If we can gather up as many of our friends and allies as we can, we'll have a small army. We can still pull off this invasion!"

Hakoda hesitated. "What I was going to say was … at this point, I'm not sure it's possible."

It was the first time they came close to having a real argument, at least from Sokka's side. "But, Dad, the whole point of going to Ba Sing Se was to gather an army to invade the Fire Nation Capital!" That was what really had Sokka sold on the idea. Never mind the fact that it was possibly his greatest idea to date; they had put too much effort and gone through too much for the sake of this invasion plan to give up on it now.

"Yes, Sokka, I know that. But the city has fallen. Without the Earth Kingdom behind us, I"m afraid that—"

"What?" Sokka challenged, turning away with his arms folded. "We give up? _That's_ not going to happen!"

He didn't see Hakoda's proud, satisfied smile after he said this. "Spoken like a true warrior."

* * *

><p>It wasn't long before Fire Nation ships were spotted in Chameleon Bay, no doubt meant to occupy the newly conquered Ba Sing Se.<p>

After a shocking and unsettling war council, Hakoda consented to one of Sokka's plans—probably the most risky one he had ever proposed. First, Katara and Toph used their bending together to flood and destroy the Water Tribe ships. They made it look like they were escaping on the smaller canoes. They spent one night camping on land.

Then, just as they'd hoped, a Fire Navy ship pulled into the harbor not far from the wreckage. That night they made their raid.

"I shouldn't be here," Katara muttered as they put on masks, which would protect them from inhaling the foul fumes from the tangle mines. "I should've stayed with Aang."

"I want to be with him too," Toph agreed, "but right now, we're needed here. Aang will be fine, and if we pull this off, he'll have a safe place to recover."

They climbed up the ropes secured with grappling hooks, expecting a fight when they came on the deck—only to find a few well-fed young soldiers who had conked out after their meal. The fight didn't start until some of the armored firebenders came up to see what was going on; then the excitement got started. Katara's waterbending defended them; the Water Tribesmen's stink bombs subdued them; and Toph's metalbending trapped them in place.

They left the real Fire Nation soldiers tied up on the beach. Eventually, Katara hoped, someone would find them, or they would be able to get to civilization on their own.

The Fire Nation ship became their new disguise and hiding place. Toph was glad to be in an environment that she could bend, but Katara didn't like it. Living on the Fire Nation ship felt too similar to staying on Zuko's ship … metal walls, dim red light, the echoes of cavernous hallways. The only thing missing was the smell of Iroh's tea brewing in the galley.

Sokka suggested they go to through the Serpent's Pass next; then the group would be able to sail out of the Earth Kingdom and start heading west, in the direction of the Fire Nation. He also meant to find out if any of the Kyoshi Warriors would be willing to join in the invasion; but that plan was necessarily abandoned when they saw the Fire Nation barricade that awaited them at the Pass.

They put their disguise to the test, then. Hakoda reported that the Southern Water Tribe fleet had been destroyed, and requested permission to pass. For one suspenseful, paralyzing moment, it seemed that it wouldn't work; but Hakoda never faltered, and a moment later the watchman raised the gate for them to pass through.

The watchman called down to them as they passed through. "By the time you join the rest of the fleet, they'll probably send you straight home!"

"What makes you say that?" Sokka asked, trying not to sound suspicious.

"Didn't you hear? The war's almost over! The Avatar was killed in Ba Sing Se!"

Instead of erupting into cheers as he probably expected, an uneasy silence fell over the metal deck. Both Katara and Toph found themselves wincing or clenching their fists in anger.

Sokka looked thoughtful as they left the barricade. "So the Avatar is dead …"

"What are you so happy about, Sokka?" Katara demanded. "They think they've won!"

"I know," Sokka said, smiling smugly. "And that's just the break we needed."

* * *

><p>Zuko finally saw Mai and Ty Lee again, for the first time in years, while preparing to leave Ba Sing Se. Ironically, all four Fire Nation teens were dressed in Earth Kingdom garb.<p>

Ty Lee had actually squealed in excitement. "Zuko!"

"Show your respect," Azula admonished. "He's your prince again."

"That's great! I mean—" Ty Lee bowed, and Mai followed suit. "Excellent."

"It's about time," was Mai's comment. Her eyes met Zuko's briefly, as she straightened up.

They had both grown a lot since they last saw each other. It was the first time either of Azula's friends saw Zuko with his scar, and with longer hair that he was growing out.

"The Avatar fell," Azula informed her friends. "Iroh fought back, but we have him in custody."

"Oh." Ty Lee looked politely saddened. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to waste your sympathy on him," Azula said dismissively.

"Prince Zuko?" He paused and turned to look at the speaker, Mai. She looked at him with some emotion, however unreadable, in her eyes. "It's good to have you back."

That was the most sincere thing he had ever heard her say. "Thank you," Zuko said, looking at her with a mixture of confusion and appreciation.

Azula contacted the Fire Nation forces closest to Ba Sing Se, swiftly arranging the occupation of the city as well as the teenagers' return home. By silent agreement—or assent—it was decided that Ty Lee and Mai would go to the Fire Nation Capitol along with the royal siblings. Zuko didn't quite understand why; their services weren't needed, now that Azula was taking both him and Iroh back to the Fire Nation; but they never argued either way.

"So … are you glad to be going back, to the Fire Nation?" Zuko asked Mai at one point during their voyage.

"More glad than I'd be to go back to New Ozai. That city was a prison." Zuko had looked surprised, but she didn't notice. "There was nothing holding me there."

"What about your family?"

"They couldn't argue with Azula's request, and it was an _honor_ for me to be able to help my country. Besides, they have my brother to keep them happy." After leaving New Ozai, she had received word that the rebels had unexpectedly returned Tom-Tom to her parents.

Zuko didn't answer. It sounded as though Mai didn't even miss her family … That thought just led him back to his latest troubling thoughts.

What would it be like when he returned home?

Could things go back to normal, the way they had been before he was banished? Iroh wouldn't be there in the royal court. And if Azula was right about his welcome, he wouldn't be just the kid who happened to be the prince and heir; he would be honored as a triumphant war hero.

One night, near the end of their journey, Mai found him standing on the deck of their ship, staring out at the moon and ocean.

Mai didn't bother greeting him. "Aren't you cold?"

That sounded familiar—as did Zuko's answer. "I've got a lot on my mind." He didn't look at Mai, but at the black sea before them. "It's been so long. Over three years since I was home. I wonder what's changed. I wonder how I've changed."

Mai yawned. "I just asked if you were cold. I didn't ask for your whole life story."

Zuko was a little annoyed at her lack of sympathy when he was actually speaking his thoughts. But then Mai smiled—a rare, surprisingly beautiful sight—and draped one arm around him. "Stop worrying."

She kissed him, then, her fingerless-gloved hands cupping his scarred face. He did nothing to stop her, but he didn't do much to respond. Still, it was … sweet, and more meaningful than he'd felt with Jin, and arguably freer than he'd felt with Katara.

He had come back to at least one good thing. Maybe Mai could fill up whatever gap he was feeling inside.

* * *

><p>Toph and Katara were standing at the ship railing, talking and, in the latter's case, watching the waves, when the former felt someone stumble up the stairs and onto the metal deck.<p>

"Momo?"

Toph recognized that confused voice, and the vibrations the person made as he pushed himself up. "Twinkletoes, that's gotta be you!" she exclaimed, turning away from the rail. Katara gasped, running with Toph up to the others.

"Aang, you're awake!"

"Are you sure?" Aang rubbed his eyes. "I feel like I'm dreaming."

Toph laughed, throwing her arms around him in a hug. She felt Aang stagger slightly, as though surprised or caught off guard.

"You're not dreaming," Katara promised, putting a hand on his shoulder. "You're finally awake."

Sokka walked up, still in his Fire Nation uniform disguise, and gave Aang a quick hug. "Aang! Good to see you back among the living, buddy."

"Sokka?" Aang stared in confusion. Toph could feel his weight teetering.

"Uh-oh, somebody catch him, he's gonna …"

Katara barely caught Aang as he fainted onto the deck.

"I think waking up here was a shock," Pipsqueak observed.

"And of course he would wake up when there was no one with him," Sokka said sardonically.

Katara cradled Aang in her arms, the way she had on their way to Chameleon Bay. Toph knelt down in front of them. "He's not falling asleep again, is he?" she asked anxiously.

"I don't think so," Katara said softly.

Aang moaned, his eyes blinking slowly open. "What's going on?"

"It's okay, Aang," Katara reassured him. She helped him sit up straight. Bato carried a blanket and put it over Aang's bare shoulders.

When he spoke, Toph became aware of something: Aang's voice was changing. She could clearly replay his speaking voice in her mind, and when she compared it to the way he spoke now—it was the same person, but his voice was developing. It had probably been doing so for a while, but it hadn't become noticeable to her until now, after going weeks without hearing him talk.

"Why are we on a Fire Nation ship? Why is everyone dressed this way? And why am I the only one out of it?"

"You need to take it easy, okay? You got hurt pretty bad." Aang slumped forward in something like disappointment or acceptance. "I like your hair," Katara complimented.

"I have hair?" Aang exclaimed in disbelief, before frantically feeling his scalp.

"He has hair?" Toph said, sounding surprised. "Wow."

"How long was I out?" Aang demanded.

"A few weeks."

_Weeks_. When he had returned to Ba Sing Se, there had been just two months left before the Day of Black Sun. How much time was left until then? Or until Sozin's Comet? How much had happened while he was unconscious?

At least it was weeks instead of decades, Aang thought wryly, remembering how confused he'd been when he came out of the iceberg.

Hakoda approached them. "Everything okay?"

Katara looked the other way. "We're fine, Dad."

Aang looked up at the man, who smiled down at the young Avatar. "I'm Hakoda, Katara and Sokka's father," he said, offering his hand.

"He knows who you are," Katara said crossly; "I just called you 'Dad,' didn't I?"

There was a moment of silence. "I guess you're right," Hakoda said.

Aang smoothed over the awkwardness by offering his own hand. "It's nice to officially meet you, Chief Hakoda."

"It's an honor to meet you."

"Great, great, now you guys have finally met. So would you mind giving us a little privacy?"

"Of course." Hakoda walked away.

Toph was surprised, albeit slightly impressed at how Katara was able to assert herself that way with her parent. "Do you want me to leave?" she asked.

"No, you're fine," Katara said.

Aang glanced at Katara. "Are you mad at your dad or something?"

"What? Not at all. Why would you say that?"

Aang shrugged, and then cringed as he felt pain shoot through is side.

"What's wrong?" Toph asked.

"Why don't we go inside?" Katara said, getting to her feet. "You need a healing session." She helped Aang stand up and led him downstairs. Toph followed them; if anyone asked, she would say that she had nothing else to do; but no one questioned why she followed them.

Katara set up a few bowls of water in Aang's room. Toph sat off to the side while Katara guided the water onto Aang's back.

"Tell me where your pain feels most intense."

Aang winced. "A little higher." He grunted again, feeling the heated pain intensify before quieting under Katara's water. Then, he realized he'd felt that sensation before.

_ The crystal tent exploded. Aang started to rise up in the air on a column of light; his eyes and arrows glowed with more intensity than any any other time when he'd entered the Avatar State._

"Wow," Aang said. "You are definitely in the right area there."

"I can feel a lot of energy twisted up around there," Katara agreed.

_Energy_. Aang wondered if something had happened to his chakras in the Catacombs. Was the final chakra still locked, as Guru Pathik had said?

"Let me just see if I can …" Katara pulled the water away from Aang's body; suddenly his back arched backward, stiffening as though he'd belt a physical shock.

He remembered.

_ A bolt of lightning struck Aang's body; he writhed in midair as the electricity entered his back and exited through his foot. He'd never felt so much physical pain and shock; at the same time his spiritual subconscious was aware that everything—the control, the cosmic energy—was fading, and then he was falling, physically and metaphysically._

_ Katara looked down sadly at him. Toph clutched his hand and didn't let go._

Aang was shocked. "I went down," he realized. "I didn't just get hurt, did I?" He pressed a hand to his forehead. "It was worse than that. I was _gone_. But you brought me back."

Katara did not affirm or deny this. "I just used the spirit water from the North Pole," she said. "I don't know what I did, exactly."

Aang turned to look at her, amazement and gratitude in his eyes. "You saved me."

Katara placed a gentle hand on Aang's cheek. "You need to rest." Katara stood up, but Toph remained seated on the bed.

"Aang?" Toph's voice was timid.

"What?"

"Can I look at you? I … Katara says you look different now."

"Sure," Aang said indifferently.

Toph knelt down where Katara had stood, and reached out experimentally. Her hands found Aang's shoulders first. She felt the short hairs on his head, like stubble on a man who hasn't shaved for a few days. His arms felt even skinnier than they used to be—and no wonder, if he hadn't eaten in those few weeks.

Katara took hold of her wrist and gently guided her hand to Aang's back. Toph's eyes widened when she felt the rough skin on his scar. "How …?"

"That's where Azula's lightning entered," Katara said grimly.

Lightning. It was one of the things that Toph couldn't feel tangibly, unless she wanted to hurt herself. She did remember feeling air charged with electricity when Azula struck Iroh some two months before. But even then, she hadn't known personally the damage that it could do.

"Toph saved you, too," Katara said kindly. Toph felt her cheeks heat up a bit. "She could tell you were in trouble. If she and Sokka hadn't found us in the right place, we might not have gotten away."

"What about Iroh?" Aang could tell something was wrong, when he saw the sad looks on their faces.

"He told me to get you out while he held them off," Katara said. "He saved us both."

Aang looked away, his gaze falling on the Fire Nation wall hanging.

"You get some rest. We'll wake you when it's morning."

Toph followed Katara, but then paused at the door. "Aang? I'm really glad you're okay."

Aang didn't answer. Toph ducked her head and left the room, hoping that her friend would awaken soon.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I did say in the summary, from the very beginning, that this story would include some slight Mai/Zuko romance. I'm sorry if this bothers some of you. I like Mai, and I even like writing about her with Zuko. And she will play a small role in this story; so yes, the friendship/romance is necessary.


	35. No Need to Say Goodbye

_Published January 20, 2012_

**Author's Note:** I've been thinking lately about the early chapters of this story, about Katara on Zuko's ship. Sometimes I feel like I should go back and improve them, but I don't know how. What are your opinions, readers?

The title of this chapter is taken from the beautiful song "The Call" by Regina Spektor.

* * *

><p>"No Need to Say Goodbye"<p>

I didn't ask Ali about Baba. I didn't want to see him yet. In my head, I had it all planned: I'd make a grand entrance, a hero, prized trophy in bloodied hands. Heads would turn and eyes would lock. Rostam and Sohrab sizing each other up. A dramatic moment of silence. Then the old warrior would walk to the young one, embrace him, acknowledge his worthiness. Vindication. Salvation. Redemption. And then? Well … happily ever after, of course. What else? ~ Khaled Hosseini, _The Kite Runner_

* * *

><p>In the morning, everyone was finally able to sit down together and catch up on everything that had happened. Mostly Aang needed to be filled in on what had happened while Katara was in Ba Sing Se, and what had transpired since they left the city.<p>

Amazingly, despite all the negative things that had happened, Sokka still seemed to have retained his "positive attitude". He was optimistic about the revised invasion plan.

"And the best part is, the eclipse isn't even our biggest advantage." Sokka lowered his voice to a whisper, looking gleeful. "We have a secret: you."

"Me?" Aang looked slightly bewildered.

"Yep! The whole world thinks you're dead." Sokka stood up triumphantly. "Isn't that great?"

Toph couldn't see Aang's horrified expression, but she could sense the horror in his stunned silence. Instead of answering right away, Aang stood and went to the railing of the ship. Toph snorted. "What a way to break it to him, Sokka."

Aang's mind was reeling, in almost the same way it had when he and Katara figured out that he had been frozen in the iceberg for a hundred years. It wasn't the first time that the world had despaired that the Avatar was dead. Up until last winter, everyone in the world had thought that the Avatar had failed and was gone for good. But when Aang had returned, word had spread that he was alive and actively working against the Fire Nation. Katara had mentioned, before, that Aang gave people hope.

And now they were back where they started, in despair because they thought he had failed them.

"The world thinks I'm dead?" Aang repeated, turning back to look at the others. "How is that good news? That's terrible!"

"No, it's great," Sokka said. "It means the Fire Nation won't be hunting us anymore. And even better, they won't expect you on the Day of Black Sun."

"No, no, no, no, no," Aang said. "You don't understand. This is so messed up!"

Before they could argue, they heard a loud horn blast—a signal from an approaching Fire Nation ship. They could see it coming toward them, already not far away.

"I'll handle this," Aang said determinedly. He'd fought off Fire Nation battleships before; he could make a comeback now. "The Avatar is back!" He opened his glider, even though the simple action of opening it caused a spasm of pain in his side.

Katara stopped him from taking off. "Aang, wait. Remember, they don't know we're not Fire Nation."

Aang reluctantly closed the glider. Hakoda and Bato donned metal helmets, completing their Fire Nation uniform disguises, and told the others to hide in a cargo pit and the stairway that led to the lower deck. Aang crouched down beside Toph, both of them tensed as though ready to leap into action.

"I hate not being able to do anything," Aang whispered.

"Hopefully, you won't need to," Toph answered.

Aang waited, but Toph actually listened. In addition to the Fire Nation officers' conversation with Hakoda, she also heard their whispered plan to sink the ship.

"They know!" That was all she said before she struck, bending the metal deck and ramp so the officers fell into the water.

Everyone emerged from the hiding place, but while the others got ready to defend the ship, Sokka pulled Aang back into the base of the tower. They could hear the sounds of a battle—shouted instructions, roaring flames, projectiles splashing into the water. The entire ship rocked from the impact of a fireball that scraped the side of the vessel.

Outside, Katara conjured a fog to provide cover, but that prevented them from seeing the next fireball launched at them. This one landed on the deck, destroying Toph's earth disk projectiles.

"I can't just stand by and do nothing!" Aang burst out, before rushing back outside.

"Aang, no!" Sokka followed him and grabbed Aang's staff, not letting him go further. "You're still hurt, and you have to stay secret. Just let us handle this."

Aang turned around angrily. "Fine," he said, taking back his staff and heading back inside.

After another five minutes, the noise and vibrations of battle stopped. Aang reasoned it was over; but he stayed in his room.

Aang had spent the better part of the past year trying to accept and come to terms with his role as the Avatar and his responsibility to end the war. And now, he was being told to stay put while everyone else sorted out the mess and focused on protecting _him._ They were convinced that he had to stay a secret, even if that meant hiding while his friends were fighting. He hated that.

* * *

><p>Aang stayed in his room for the rest of the day The others gave Aang his space; Katara figured he needed to rest, since he was still recovering from his injuries. But the three teammates did come into his room that evening.<p>

"Hey Aang," Toph said. "We're going into town to find some dinner."

Just then Aang's stomach made a gurgling noise. "Well, I am pretty hungry," he admitted. "Maybe dinner's a good idea."

The others looked happy at this response. Sokka came up, holding out a long strip of red cloth. "Here. Tie this around your head. It'll cover your arrow."

Aang glanced down at the headband, his expression darkening as he changed his mind. "I won't go out if I can't wear my arrow proudly."

Sokka stared at him, but Katara spoke up soothingly. "You guys go ahead; we'll catch up."

Toph followed Sokka out of the cabin, but then Toph hung back just outside the doorway. Sokka glanced back at her. "Toph? Aren't you coming?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe I'll stay with Aang or something." She turned back to the bedroom, standing just outside the doorway. She could hear Katara speaking gently to Aang.

"I think I understand why being a secret bothers you so much. You don't want people to think you failed."

"You're right, I don't," Aang agreed. "But the problem is, I _did_ fail."

"Aang, that's not true."

"It is true. I was in Ba Sing Se. I was there, but I lost. And now, the Earth Kingdom has fallen for good." Aang remembered the argument they'd had after they found Appa; they could have left the city right away. But they had taken a chance and stayed—and they had allowed the city to be taken.

Katara stood up. "It's not for good," she said, almost sounding like her usual cheerful self. "Remember, there's still a plan: the invasion."

"And I hate the invasion plan, too!" Aang was angry now, almost shouting. "I don't want you or anyone else risking your lives to fix _my_ mistakes." His voice became heavy, grim with resolve. "I've always known that I would have to face the Fire Lord, but now, I know I need to do it alone."

"Aang …"

"Katara, please. Just go. Please."

Katara complied sadly, going over to the door. But before leaving she asked, "Is there anything you need?" Maybe she would bring him dinner if he wasn't going to come with them.

Aang was silent for a moment, before answering somberly. "I need to redeem myself. I need my honor back."

He heard something like choking, and then a sob. Aang turned around and was startled to see that Katara was crying, though she had something like anger in her eyes. "You sounded just like him," Katara choked out, sounding anguished.

Then Aang realized: he had just said Zuko's motto. "Oh spirits, Katara, I'm sorry—"

She shook her head. "Forget it." Then she hurried out of the room, barely noticing Toph as she passed her.

Toph stood in the doorway and put her hands on her hips. "Way to go, Aang."

He took it as a bad sign that she called him by his real name. "I didn't mean—"

"Do you think you're the only one who got hurt in Ba Sing Se?" Toph demanded, striding back into the room. "Katara left Jet behind, then Zuko stabbed her in the back, and then she almost lost you. She carried your lifeless body out of the Catacombs." Toph's voice was trembling with anger. "When she caught up with us—when we saw her carrying you—Aang, we honestly thought we'd lost you. And the whole time you were sleeping, we took turns staying with you. And now you're awake, and we're trying to hold everything together, working to make _some_ progress, and offering any help you may need; and you tell us to _just go_. After you and Katara saved each other."

Aang bowed his head, feeling shame rise up in him. Toph was one of the few people who could make him recognize his own faults and failures. But she only did that to make him realize how to do better.

Toph spoke again, thinking of Iroh and his way of phrasing wise words."We can't change what happened; all we can do is try to keep going." She folded her arms. "So you need to pull yourself together and figure out what you're gonna do next."

With that said, Toph turned and left the room, leaving Aang alone with his turbulent thoughts.

* * *

><p>This was the kind of welcome Zuko had wanted for the past three years. Only now, he didn't know how he felt about it. A month ago he had been reviled as a traitor; and now he was being treated like a beloved celebrity. The cheering crowd, Li and Lo's booming introduction—it all seemed surreal to him.<p>

The Royal Palace itself seemed real enough. The red walls with gold and black decorations were much the same as what Zuko remembered.

After the return ceremony, the first place Zuko went to was the garden. There, he found some things had changed. It was not the verdant oasis that it had been when his mother was with them. But he couldn't remember whether it had been this decayed when he left three years before. Azula found him feeding the turtle ducks, and not finding any joy in it.

"You seem so downcast. Has Mai gotten to you already?" She paused, smiling slyly. "Though, actually, Mai has been in a strangely good mood lately."

Zuko couldn't begin to list all the things that were bothering him. So he named the most imminent concern. "I haven't seen Dad yet." It felt so odd, to call him "Dad." They never used that familiar term to his face, or when others were present; they called him "Father" in person, and "the Fire Lord" before others. "I haven't seen him in three years—since I was banished."

"So what?"

Zuko was annoyed at her blatant indifference. "So, I didn't capture the Avatar." The terms of his banishment had been specific (or so he had always believed): he needed to capture the Avatar and bring him into the custody of the Fire Nation, and then he would be allowed to return home.

"Who cares? The Avatar's dead." Azula looked at Zuko, acting suspicious when he didn't respond. "Unless you think he somehow, miraculously, survived."

That possibility _had_ occurred to Zuko, during their journey back. Now, he thought of Katara, one of two people whom he had been trying hard not to think about. She did have healing abilities. Could she have healed him?

_"This is water from the Spirit Oasis at the North Pole. It has special properties, so I've been saving it for something important."_

She had offered to use it on him; but she still had it when she left the Catacombs. It was possible, then, that she could have administered it while healing the Avatar.

But it was a theory, nothing more. So Zuko went along with Azula's claim, that the Avatar was dead, the reincarnation cycle broken, the Fire Nation's greatest threat destroyed.

Then came the most frightening part of his return, which also turned out to be the most shocking: He met with his father, Fire Lord Ozai, for the first time in three years. The last time he'd seen him, was when he burned and banished him. And now he had to, for all intents and purposes, throw himself upon his mercy yet again.

There was no joyous reunion, not that Zuko had expected one. But he heard words that he had wanted to hear, that he had been convinced would save him.

"You have redeemed yourself, my son.

"I am proud of you, Prince Zuko.

"Welcome home."

Why didn't he feel the rush of satisfaction he had always wanted and expected?

Maybe because he also heard words that made his conviction falter: _When your loyalty was tested … Captured the traitor … The moment of truth._

And then came the shocking part: Ozai said that Azula had told him of Zuko's success in slaying the Avatar, not her own.

Zuko didn't dare to correct Ozai, and thereby accuse Azula of lying. But he did confront Azula that evening, demanding to know why she had lied—especially to the Fire Lord. Never mind that he was the person whom Azula was most loyal to; lying to the monarch was treasonous, and could be punished most severely. She had to have a good reason for lying this time.

By the end of the night, Zuko had learned one thing for certain: Azula also suspected that the Avatar could be alive.

Perhaps this was another reason why Azula had offered him a chance to join her. Maybe she had known that the Avatar might escape, and wanted to involve Zuko so she could use him as a scapegoat if necessary.

Thinking about it made Zuko's head hurt. He had wanted out of the Earth Kingdom, so that he wouldn't have to continue pretending to be someone he wasn't.

Had he just traded one web of deceit for another?

* * *

><p>Aang opened the door as quietly as he could, slipping out of his room. He had almost made it to the end of the hallway, when he heard someone speak.<p>

"Guess I'm not the only runaway on this ship."

Aang hung his head, knowing he was caught. "Are you going to stop me?" he asked sullenly. He didn't want to fight, either verbally or physically, with Toph.

"I have half a mind to. But if leaving is really …" She trailed off, sensing her own emotions rising more than she wanted him to notice. When she spoke again, her voice was a bit harsh, and frustratingly thick with emotion. "Do we really mean that little to you?"

"You mean _everything_ to me," Aang said. Toph couldn't stop the surprise from showing on her face. "That's why I have to leave. I'm not going to keep putting you in danger, asking you to make sacrifices for me. This war has caused people to lose enough. I have to end it."

"And you think going off on your own is the best way?"

Aang sighed, gripping his staff with both hands. "The thing is, this isn't the first time I've run away." Back then, he had been trying to run away from his destiny; but now, he was trying to run toward it. He looked back up at Toph. "I thought you, of all people, would understand the need to do that."

Toph's voice was small. "Where will you go?"

"To the Fire Nation." Aang's voice was grim but firm. "I've known all along I'd have to go there, to find the Fire Lord. There's no avoiding it." He had lost too much time already, while he was unconscious.

"Take me with you."

Aang blinked at her. "What?"

"Katara and Sokka have their dad and Bato; Pipsqueak and The Duke have each other. What am I going to do if you're not here for me to train?"

"You're the world's greatest earthbender, and the only living metalbender. You'll be a huge help to them."

"Not as much help as I'd be to you," Toph argued.

"Toph, I'll be flying, and if I fall I'll be swimming."

"Didn't you promise that you'd teach me to swim?"

"Maybe someday," Aang muttered. _If we both live long enough_.

"I'm gonna hold you to that," Toph informed him. It was the same thing she'd said when he promised to take her on a vacation of her own.

Aang cracked a sad smile. Then he set his glider against the wall and embraced the small girl. Aang found he had enough strength to hold her tightly against him.

"This is _not_ good-bye," Toph insisted, speaking into his shoulder. Even if she kept her silence, the others would discover that Aang had left. Then they would go look for him; and they would find him—because they always found each other eventually.

Aang pulled away gently. He gave her shoulder a final squeeze, and then he let go of her and turned away, heading up to the main deck.

* * *

><p>Toph waited until half an hour had passed. She heard Katara go into Aang's room with a plate of food, only to drop it and run up to the bridge tower. Toph followed her slowly, and passed Bato on her way up the stairs. She could hear Katara arguing with Hakoda on the bridge.<p>

Toph was about to step in, but she heard Hakoda say, "Maybe that's his way of being brave."

"It's _not_ brave, it's stupid and selfish!" Katara burst out angrily, her voice rising in frustration. "We could be helping him. And I know the world needs him, but doesn't he know how much we need him too? How could he just leave us behind?"

Toph felt sympathy mixed with guilt, because she knew exactly what Katara meant. She wished she had put it that way when she talked to Aang.

Hakoda spoke up quietly. "You're talking about me too, aren't you?"

"How could you leave us, Dad?" Katara's voice was thick now; Toph knew she was crying. "I mean I know we had Gran-Gran and she loved us, but … we were so lost without you!" She started to sob.

"I am so sorry, Katara." Hakoda's voice was full of regret.

"I understand why you left. I really do, and I know that you had to go … so _why_ do I still feel this way? I was so sad and angry and hurt."

"I love you more than anything. You and your brother are my entire world. I thought about you very day I was gone, and every night when I went to sleep, I would lay awake missing you so much, it would ache."

Toph was surprised by the stinging sensation in her eyes. She told herself it was just a little empathy—she hadn't realized how much Katara and Sokka must have missed their family. And yet, hearing the tender exchange, she couldn't help but wonder.

Did her parents feel at all like that—parents missing a child, or being the ones left behind?

She might have thought so, if the memory of their bounty hunters wasn't so fresh in her mind. Now she felt the same way she had when she'd realized that the rendezvous was a trap—hurt and angry, in spite of herself.

But she didn't have time to think about that now. Hakoda quickly called a meeting on the main deck, and explained what had happened.

"We have to find Aang," Katara said, her voice now free of tears.

Toph took that opportunity to speak up. "I think I know where he went."

Katara turned to her in shock. "What?"

"I talked to him, right before he left."

Everyone stared at her, but she couldn't see their stunned expressions. "You mean you knew?" Katara was furious. "How could you let him—"

"Because it was his choice, not mine," Toph said firmly. Katara had no response to this. "Anyway, he told me he planned to go the Fire Nation."

"We have to go find him," Katara said, with some of her old determination. Sokka nodded in agreement.

"There's something else, too," Toph said. "Aang still needs to master earthbending. He can't do that out here." She gestured to the metal ship and ocean waves.

"She's right," Bato said. They all seemed to be thinking similarly, though they hesitated to voice it.

"We've already planned the major points of the invasion," Sokka said. "All we need to do now is consolidate forces." He hesitated, and then turned to Hakoda. "Dad, if we go to find Aang, can you still pick up our friends in the Earth Kingdom?"

"That, we can do."

"So, we're going to the Fire Nation right away?" Toph clarified.

"You, Katara and I. If that's okay?" Sokka said, looking between his sister and his father.

"Of course," Hakoda said.

Katara looked at him sadly. Then she looked down at the metal deck. "I'm sorry about what I said," she apologized.

"No. I'm glad to told me how you felt."

"This isn't good-bye," Sokka said, coming up to them. "This is, 'See you soon.'" The three Water Tribe family members smiled at each other, and then shared a group hug.

Toph went over to Pipsqueak and The Duke. "I'll see you next month," she said.

The Duke saluted, while Pipsqueak clapped a hand on her back, actually knocking her down. "Sorry," he mumbled.

Appa had a new saddle that they had discreetly picked up at one of the towns they'd stopped in. They loaded it with some supplies—food, money, and Sokka's important charts—covered them with tarps, and tied them down. It started to rain as they left, but no one mentioned this as a reason to delay.

As they climbed into the new saddle, Toph felt the same anticipation she'd had the night she ran away and flew on Appa for the first time. She had a quiet conviction that she was doing the right thing, embarking on a journey with her friends—people who cared about her and needed her.

"Yip-yip!" Sokka said, for the first time in weeks. Appa's tail hit the metal deck as he ascended into the cloudy night sky.

Katara used waterbending to create a cloud to cover them as they flew over the naval blockade. "Okay, so we're officially in Fire Nation territory," Sokka said. "But the whole country is a bunch of volcanic islands and archipelagos. How'll we find Aang in this area?"

"Appa can find him," Toph said, reaching over the saddle to pat the sky bison. Appa had been able to find Aang in Ba Sing Se; perhaps their spiritual bond would help them again.

Katara was able to keep them dry when they passed through the brief storm. Toph was probably the most frightened; she'd never been so close to thunder and lightning, two things that she couldn't sense physically without risking getting hurt. She clutched Sokka's arm and bit her lip to keep from crying out whenever she heard a close crack of thunder.

"This was a mistake," Sokka said fearfully, clinging to the saddle with his free hand. "We should have stayed with the group."

Katara turned around to glare at him. "Aang is somewhere by himself out here!" she shouted, gesturing to the tumult and darkness all around them.

"We had to do something," Toph said stubbornly. "Aang is worth it."

Sokka said nothing. He couldn't argue that.

It was almost morning when the water and wind finally calmed. The clouds cleared up, allowing them to see the sun rise above them, and discern what lay below them.

"There's land!" Katara said, pointing ahead. "Well, actually little more than a volcano …" She stopped, and then looked over her shoulder. "Sokka, do you recognize that place?"

Sokka came up to the front of the saddle and studied the small land mass. "A crescent-shaped island … stick a Fire Sage temple on it—that's where Aang first saw Avatar Roku," Sokka remembered. He glanced at his sister. "Hey, what was the name of the sage who helped us?"

"Shyu," Katara answered, and then gasped. "There he is!"

"What, he's still there?"

"Not Shyu—Aang!"

"What?" Toph exclaimed. "How is he?"

"Unconscious, but he's out of the water—he has to be alive! Appa, down there!" The bison descended, and a few minutes later they landed on the island.

Toph leapt down, and for the first time, her feet made contact with Fire Nation soil. She discovered what a volcanic island felt like; the rock was solid, but full of holes and air bubbles. And then, she sensed Aang, lying on the shore.

Momo reached him first, licking his face and waking him up. Aang groaned and sat up slowly.

"Aang!" Toph shouted and ran to him, splashing through water at the shoreline. Katara had been rushing toward him, but seeing Toph she slowed her pace and let the younger girl reach him first. Toph dropped to her knees in front of Aang, surprising him with an enthusiastic hug.

"You found me," Aang murmured.

"'Course we did," Toph said smugly. "We always find each other." She laughed as she pulled away, because it was easier for her to laugh than to cry.

Aang glanced up at Katara and Sokka as they approached. "I saw Avatar Roku … and then I saw Yue." The two siblings stared at him in surprise. "She helped me get through the storm. She saved me."

"That's twice now," Katara murmured, thinking of the Spirit Water.

_Thanks, Yue,_ both Sokka and Toph thought.

Katara knelt down and hugged Aang; Sokka and Toph joined them, and even Momo and Appa came up and pressed in on them. It was like the group hug they'd shared at the Earth King's palace; their group was united and whole again.

"I have so much to do," Aang acknowledged as he broke away.

"I know, but you'll have our help," Katara promised.

Toph spoke up with a smile. "You didn't think you could get out of training just by coming to the Fire Nation, did you?"

Aang looked warily at his friends. "What about the invasion?"

Sokka answered with confidence. "We'll meet up with my dad and the invasion force on the day of the eclipse."

Toph felt something solid brush against her ankle. "Hey, what's …" Toph reached into the water, and recognized the wooden object she pulled out. "Oh … it's your glider." She handed it to him apologetically.

"That's okay," Aang said as they all stood up. He wouldn't be able to use it here, anyway. "If someone saw it, it would give away my identity. It's better for now that no one knows I'm alive."

He turned and used airbending to jump up onto a mound. For a moment, he looked down into the volcano, his expression solemn but accepting. Then he spun the glider above his head, and planted it firmly in the lava. It stood there, like a monument, until the heat from the lava ignited the wood and cloth. The glider was consumed like a funeral pyre, laying the past to rest.

It was a part of his past, which he would always remember, but he had to leave it behind, to focus on the present and the future.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I took out a scene about Aang's encounter with Roku and Yue, because it wouldn't be any different from how it happened in the show; but I may post it as a one-chapter glimpse into Aang's thoughts during that scene.


	36. Constant Change

_Published March 26, 2013. Happy Passover and/or Easter!_

**Author's Note:** I'm sorry this chapter took so long! I was at a standstill re-watching the series, and I wasn't sure how many scenes to include in this chapter; and I rewrote part of Chapter Thirty-Six, "The Awakening." Let me know what you think of the new version! Basically this chapter has some canon events with alterations, some lighthearted bonding after so much suspense and angst, and the start of a new development in the story!

**Song:** "Dance With Me" by Drew Seeley featuring Belinda, from _The Cheetah Girls 2_

**Illustrations:** "Dance with me." by Nymre, "For Oukami666:Silly Love Song" by xcgirl08, and "Ready for my lessons" by anemi-j on DeviantArt.

* * *

><p>"Constant Change"<p>

A skeptic adhering to a believer is as simple as the law of complementary colors. What we lack attracts us. Nobody loves the light like a blind man. The dwarf adores the drum major. The toad is always looking up at the sky. Why? To see the bird fly. Grantaire, crawling with doubt, loved to see faith soaring in Enjolras. ~Victor Hugo, _Les Misérables_

* * *

><p>The team's immediate plan was relatively simple: alternate between hiding out in secluded areas and blending in with the Fire Nation civilians. They stole some disguises from clothesline that seemed to be shared by multiple families. Aang found a suit that covered the arrows tattooed on his limbs, and accepted the cloth that Sokka offered to tie around his head.<p>

"Now we both have headbands," Toph observed, laying one hand on Aang's forehead and patting her own hair with the other.

"You should probably get a red—one that's more Fire Nation style," Sokka said, remembering that Toph couldn't see the color of their new clothing.

They went shopping in the nearest town to find small, more personalized accessories: a headband for Toph, a flame-shaped topknot holder for Sokka, and a necklace for Katara (she tucked her mother's Water Tribe necklace in the belt of her new skirt, so she could still keep it with her). Aang led the group, surprising passersby with his open friendliness; but he opted to wait outside while the others browsed in a meat shop.

Toph was so distracted by the different smells inside the store, she almost didn't notice the vibrations, or lack thereof, outside the shop.

"Is Aang still waiting for us?" she asked Katara, keeping her voice low. "I can't feel him anymore."

Sokka and Katara exchanged glances, then quickly wrapped up their purchases and went outside.

There was no preteen boy waiting for them, outside the shop or anywhere in the street.

"Aang wouldn't have wandered off by himself," Katara said, already sounding distressed.

"I don't know," Toph said ambivalently. "He seemed pretty confident in what he remembers of the Fire Nation. Maybe he wanted to explore while we were shopping?"

"But he can't know for sure how things are here! He was acting so friendly it was conspicuous. What if someone suspects him of something? What if someone sees his tattoos?"

"Calm down. If Aang were in trouble, Toph would already know," Sokka said jokingly.

Toph stopped short. "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, a little indignant.

"Nothing," was the innocent response. "Just that you're the one usually attuned to Aang. You knew when he needed help in Ba sing Se, and you knew where he went when he ran away …"

"I just happened to see him leave, and got him to tell me what he was doing."

"And he trusted you not to tell anyone right away?"

Katara intervened. "Drop it, Sokka. Look, Aang knows how to get back to the cave. We can go back so that we'll be there if he returns."

Toph was quiet on the way back. It was Katara who voiced her anxiety more often as they whiled away the rest of the day.

"How can you be so relaxed?" Katara demanded of her. "I thought you would be especially concerned for Aang."

"Why _especially_?" Toph asked.

"You know why."

"'Cause he's the Avatar and most valuable team member?" Toph asked sardonically.

"No, because—"

"Look, to answer your question: I tend not to worry, because most of us are pretty able. Remember, I was kidnapped and spent a day in a metal box on the road to Gaoling; no one knew where I was; but I got away on my own. Aang's smart, and powerful, and can probably sweet-talk people if he has to. I think he'll be okay."

In the silence that followed, Toph wondered if Katara had been trying to suggest or get at something. Did she suspect that she liked Aang? Toph would have to pay more attention to the older girl's intuition …

They had already finished their dinner when Aang returned to the cave, his stolen clothes covered in ashes and scorch marks. Katara was the first to react, and wasted no time scolding Aang. "Where have you been? We were worried sick!"

Aang seemed unfazed, even cheerful. "I got invited to play with some kids after school."

All three of them were surprised. Toph noted that if any other kid had said that, it would have been normal and unsurprising; but because it was Aang, and they were in enemy territory, Sokka reacted with reasonable shock.

"After WHAT?"

"I enrolled in a Fire Nation school," Aang informed them happily, "and I'm going back tomorrow."

"Enrolled in WHAT?" Sokka groaned and fell backwards as though fainting.

"Explain," Toph said simply, gesturing to the seat next to her.

"Okay." Aang sat down by the fire and began. "When you guys went into the meat place, a school headmaster saw me and thought I was playing hookey. Apparently this outfit I chose is a school uniform. So he put me in a class. I met some kids who were friendly, and they invited me to play a game."

"What kind of game?" Katara asked, looking apprehensively at the soot and burn marks on Aang's uniform.

"Hide and Explode. Anyway, I want to go back there tomorrow."

Sokka spoke up, his voice reasonable. "Aang, I'm trying to be mature and not immediately shoot down your idea." Katara thought inwardly that this might have been a skill Sokka learned from dealing with her. "But it sounds … really terrible."

"Yeah, we got our outfits. What do you need to go to school for?" Toph asked. She'd never been in a formal school before, but it sounded something like her old life, a structured system of rules and scheduled, involuntary activities.

Aang tried to explain. "Every minute I'm in that classroom, I'm learning new things about the Fire Nation. I already have a picture of Fire Lord Ozai." He held the piece of paper up for Sokka and Katara to see. "And here's one I made out of noodles!" he added proudly, holding up a different piece.

"Can I see that? No—the one without the noodles."

Aang handed it to Toph, who passed it to Katara. The boys continued arguing, but Katara was only half-listening.

The man in the portrait had a long, thin beard. He was much younger than his brother Iroh, and didn't look much like him. There was, however, some resemblance to Zuko and Azula: pale skin, a pointed face, golden eyes. In the picture, his expression was calm and blank. Katara could only imagine how he looked on a daily basis, or when he was fighting or plotting … She shook her head at the memory of Iroh's story about the father who scarred his son.

This was the man Aang had to fight. If he would hurt his own son, he wouldn't hold anything back while facing the child Avatar.

She heard Sokka relenting. "Fine, let's stay a few more days."

Katara spoke up. "Aang, see if you can learn anything about current events, or anything that might help us with planning the invasion. See if you can learn any news about General Iroh—like where he might be now."

"Sure thing!"

Toph remained sitting by the fire while Aang ate a belated supper that Katara had saved for him. "So what was it like?" she asked conversationally.

Aang leaned back on his arms, smiling happily. "I hadn't been in a setting like that since I was learning with the monks. A bunch of kids together with one teacher. The material wasn't the most interesting—mostly history and calligraphy. But I had a lot of fun playing with the kids afterwards."

"Sounds nice," Toph said, though she sounded indifferent. "So … what'll I do while you're off at school?"

Aang frowned. "Um … help Sokka plan the invasion?"

"I'm not very good with maps, Aang."

"Sorry." Aang pulled his headband off and looked at her. "I wish I could take you with me, Toph, but …"

"Hey, we both know traditional learning isn't my thing. Reading and writing are out. They probably wouldn't admit a blind kid anyway. And if I got into a fight, I don't think I could keep myself from earthbending. "

Aang looked unconvinced, but dropped the subject.

The next day was quiet for Toph, Katara, and Sokka, until Aang finally came home from school. Then he had to sheepishly ask them to help him in a predicament: he had been told to bring his parents to meet with the headmaster and discuss his deplorable behavior.

Toph was secretly proud of Aang for getting into trouble at school, even if he hadn't meant to do so. She liked it when he showed a rebellious side like her own.

Sokka, however, was not pleased, and, still playing the stern parent, announced that Aang would not be going to school again.

"I'm not ready to leave," Aang argued. "I'm having fun for once, just being a normal kid. You don't know what it's like, Sokka. You get to be normal all the time."

Toph laughed mockingly; but she could kind of relate to what Aang meant. She remembered how much fun she'd had when she snuck out of her family's home and started competing in Earth Rumbles, interacting with other people.

"Listen, guys. Those kids at school are the future of the Fire Nation. If we want to change this place for the better, we need to show them a little taste of freedom."

Toph wondered if he meant that in the same way he'd shown her what freedom was like.

"What could you possibly do for a country of depraved little fire monsters?" Sokka asked.

Aang had a confident and excited answer ready "I'm going to throw them a secret dance party!"

* * *

><p>Aang had a secret reason for holding the party: He thought it might be a way for Toph to be able to be included in this crowd. Since he couldn't bring her to the school, he would bring the school to her. He found a teenage band called the Flamey-Os to play music free of charge.<p>

Toph sat at an earthen table with Katara and Sokka, while Aang tried to get the kids warmed up to the idea of dancing in a cave.

"Who knew Twinkle Toes could dance?" Toph remarked with a smile.

A few minutes later Aang came over to their table. "Do any of you want a turn?" he asked.

Katara was full of excuses. "I don't know, Aang. These shoes aren't really right for dancing, and I'm not sure that I know how to …"

"Come on. You need some fun."

Katara looked at him, smiling for the first time that night. "Okay." She got up and followed him onto the dance floor.

Toph frowned as she tried to discern what was happening in the crowd. "Does my seismic sense deceive me," she said to Sokka, "or is Aang really dancing with Katara?"

"Yeah, he just pulled her onto the dance floor. He's teaching her the dance he just showed Onji."

"Hmph." Toph folded her arms on the earth table. "Are you gonna dance?"

"Nah; I'm the chaperone," Sokka said, stroking his faux beard. "Someone has to be the responsible adult."

Toph snorted. "Who's that? Appa?" She let out a laugh, while Sokka gave her an annoyed expression that she could not see.

A few minutes later Aang and Katara came back to their table. "Thanks Aang," Katara said, panting but smiling as she returned to her seat. "I think I needed that." She hadn't had that much fun in quite a while.

"No problem." Aang glanced around the cavern, and then at Toph sitting at the table. He came up to her. "Do you want to dance?"

"Me?" Toph was surprised, though a part of her might have hoped that he would invite her. Still, she had never danced in her life, since her parents had never intended for her to have to attend any functions where she would be expected to do so. "I don't know … There are too many people around, the vibrations are kind of confusing …"

"Is the Blind Bandit afraid?" Aang asked softly, with a knowing smile.

That did it. Toph snorted. "Bring it on, Fancy Dancer."

Aang took her hand in his and led her out excitedly to the middle of the cavern. "First, we bow."

Toph rolled her eyes, but complied anyway.

"Hold your arm out, like this." She let Aang position her right arm so that she was holding it up in the air, in an arc in front of her. "I'll do the same, and our wrists touch while we circle each other."

Toph did as he said, though she added, "I'm trusting you not to make a fool out of me."

"Understood." He stood across from her, and brought his left arm up so that their wrists touched; then they circled each other, not really going anywhere. "Now switch arms and go the other way," Aang prompted.

Toph could hear how their movements matched the count of the music. But just as she was getting the rhythm, she sensed something change on the cave dance floor.

"Why'd everyone else stop dancing?" Toph asked. Then her cheeks reddened with self-consciousness. "They're all staring at us, aren't they?" she muttered.

"I thought you didn't care what people thought of you," Aang remarked.

Toph was silent for a moment, as they switched arms and started walking in the opposite circular direction. "I care about what you think of me," Toph said quietly.

The heat in Aang's cheeks had nothing to do with exertion from dancing.

"You can let loose a little. Just pretend we're training, only we're working together instead of against each other."

Toph smiled in a way that was satisfied and almost coquettish. Then she broke away from their pattern and spun in a circle. If she concentrated, she could incorporate some basic earthbending forms without visibly disturbing the earth. Sometimes she and Aang matched each other's movements; and sometimes they did their own thing; but they stayed close, circling each other until their hands met again. Aang held on to her hand and spun her out, before pulling her back in; she started to fall back, but then he was supporting her, holding her up, keeping her from falling. Both of them were out of breath but smiling; the kids around them were clapping and cheering for them.

Finally he pulled her back up, so they were both on their feet. The two preteens bowed to each other. "Ladies and gentlemen, the Blind Bandit!" Aang announced proudly, gesturing to Toph. She grinned and raised one fist in the air as though she'd just won a match; she hadn't felt this way since the last time she heard a crowd cheer for her.

After that, everyone got into the spirit of the dance party, and Toph was able to mingle with the other kids. They had many questions. "You're blind?" "Where did you come from?" "How did you do that?"

Toph answered the safer questions. "I didn't think; I just felt."

Unfortunately the party ended abruptly with a visit—though in later stories Toph called it a raid—by the school headmaster and two truant officers. It was Onji who had the brilliant backup plan: she distributed headbands for each of the kids in the crowd to wear, so Aang couldn't be identified by his own. The team made their escape through the back of the cave, sealing it off with earthbending before they boarded Appa and flew away.

"Way to go, Dancypants," Toph congratulated Aang. "You taught those kids to be free." She looked thoughtful. "Guess that means I'm not the only one anymore," she said jokingly.

"You're the one who reminded Sokka and me how to have fun," Katara added, remembering the day they brought Aang to their village in the South Pole.

"Air _is_ the element of freedom," Aang said, smiling happily with his eyes closed.

He didn't see Toph's affectionate punch, until he felt her fist hit his arm. "Thanks for the dance, Aang."

* * *

><p>Zuko didn't know what he had expected his life to be like, once his banishment was over.<p>

Of course things couldn't be as normal as they had once been. It wasn't so much that his home had chanced; Zuko was the one who had changed, during those three long years.

He had felt like he didn't belong in Ba Sing Se, because he was the Fire Prince; but now he felt like he didn't belong in the Fire Nation, because he had been outside of it for so long.

Why couldn't he just forget about them all—Katara, and Song, and Lee, and Jin—the people who had shown him kindness, and who were probably suffering now because of what he had done.

He could still see Iroh, but it wasn't the same. And he felt like a hypocrite, when he came crawling back to Iroh for advice after turning against him.

Zuko told himself that it wasn't his fault that Iroh was in prison. Iroh's own actions in the Crystal Catacombs had determined his fate here. Zuko made that clear when he finally tried to confront him.

"You brought this on yourself, you know. We could have returned together. You could have been a hero!"

Iroh made no response, except to turn further away from him.

"You think I should have joined the others? Don't think it hasn't occurred to me, Uncle. But if I had done that, then everything they said about me would have been true—that I was a traitor, not fit or worthy to be Fire Lord. That's exactly what you proved yourself to be. You wanted me to run away like a coward. That's what you did when Azula surprised us. But all that did was prolong our bigger problem. I couldn't keep doing that to myself. I'm where I belong, now. My life can have some meaning here."

He was startled when Iroh spoke. "You think your life had no meaning outside of the Fire Nation?"

Some part of Zuko's mind knew what Iroh was getting at, but he hushed it and said ambiguously, "It wasn't going to."

"But it did. I can think of a few occasions …"

"It wasn't enough! Now, I'm back in line for the throne. The things I do are going to matter. You should be happy for me. I might be able to see this war's end, or even make it happen. Isn't _that_ what she wanted?" Zuko stopped, shocked with himself for mentioning her, even if not by name.

"If you think the way to peace is here, Zuko, I'm afraid you'll be disappointed."

Zuko was silent for a moment. Then he said heavily, "I think I'm already disappointed. But the crazy thing is, I don't know why." He sat down on the cold stone floor. "I have everything I always wanted … but it's not at all how I thought it would be. The truth is, I need your advice." He leaned forward and seized two of the bars before Iroh's cell. "I think the Avatar is still alive. I know he's out there. But Azula told Father that I killed him, so that if it turns out we're right … I'm losing my mind." His tone became desperate. "Please, Uncle, I'm so confused! I need your help."

But Iroh had fallen silent again. After a moment Zuko stood up, his anger having returned. "Forget it. I'll solve this myself. I'm better off alone anyway." With that he left, slamming the cell door behind him.

Obviously, he couldn't talk to Mai about any of this. He couldn't tell her what made him so stressed and dissatisfied—like his uncle's silence, or the gnawing suspicion that the Avatar was still alive. Even if he had wanted to share his thoughts, she wouldn't be interested; and if she were, she probably wouldn't understand.

When she told him tenderly, "I don't hate you," it reminded him of the time when Katara had said those words to him, even after he told her that he did hate her. Now, the situation was probably reversed: Zuko had stopped hating her, but now, she probably hated him.

Sometimes, Zuko found himself comparing Mai and even other nobles or teenagers to Katara. These people were either cunning or superficial, or both. None of them had Katara's sincerity, her instinct and desire to help others.

He thought that Mai meant well enough, but she was kind of self-absorbed, and nothing really satisfied her. No, that wasn't quite it—she didn't even _try_ to be satisfied.

But then, who was he to judge people who didn't feel satisfied? He didn't feel that way, even after he finally got what he had worked for, for so long.

* * *

><p>A rift <em>almost<em> formed between the members of Team Avatar during the whole "Painted Lady" affair. On their fourth day in Jang Hui, Toph and Sokka woke up to find Aang and Katara were gone. That in itself may not have been strange, except for the fact that Katara's sleeping bag had some hay stuffed into it, as though meant to look like she was still there.

Toph's somewhat spiteful question was, _Why do Aang and Katara have all the adventures together?_ She didn't know how much they had done together before she joined the group; but since then, they had saved each other's lives in Ba Sing Se, and now it seemed that Katara was trusting him with secrets that she wouldn't tell either Sokka or Toph.

So she stood back while Sokka ranted at Katara and Aang about their misdemeanors. "Katara, what you did put our whole mission in jeopardy. And what's more, I thought we were done with lying and keeping secrets, especially about alter egos!" Then he rounded on Aang. "And how long have you known about this?"

Aang held up his hands innocently. "Hey, I just found out this morning."

"And you were in no hurry to tell me!"

The anger and tension only worsened when they saw the Fire Nation soldiers making their way down the river to the village.

"What did you do?" Sokka demanded angrily.

Katara's answer was quiet and guilty, not meeting Sokka's eyes. "I kind of destroyed their factory."

"WHAT?"

"Is that what you guys were doing this morning?" Toph asked Aang while the two siblings fought.

"Yeah. I didn't expect this to happen because of it."

Sokka spoke up loud enough for all of them to hear. "Remember how I said I needed to be able to trust your judgement? This is why! That was terrible judgement, for both of you!"

"Well, what was I supposed to do?" Katara asked stubbornly.

"Leave! Do nothing!"

Something seemed to snap inside Katara, who glared at Sokka defiantly. "No! I will never, ever turn my back on people who need me!" She was remembering Haru, and Zuko, and Iroh, and Jet—every person she'd found who needed help that she had been able to give. There had been times when she'd had to leave someone behind—she hadn't been able to save Jet, and Iroh had insisted that she go without him—but from now on, she would do whatever it took to save as many as she could.

Katara stood up and started to walk away decisively. "I'm going down to the village, and I am going to do whatever I can."

Sokka watched her for only a moment, with an expression that Aang couldn't quite read; then he stood and followed her. "Wait." He put his hand on her shoulder to stop her. "I'm coming too."

Katara turned to look at him. "I thought you didn't want to help."

Sokka looked at her sincerely. "_You_ need _me_," he said simply. "And I will never turn my back on you."

"Sokka … you really do have a heart," Katara marveled. Aang and Toph watched as the two Water Tribe siblings hugged.

Aang was overcome, and wiped away some tears from his eyes. "He really does have a heart, doesn't he?" He glanced at Toph, almost wonderingly. What he didn't expect was for her to punch him in the chest, _not_ in her affectionate way; it actually knocked him to the ground.

"Are you mad or something?" Aang asked, looking up at her from where he lay.

Toph folded her arms. "You should have told me. If you wanted to destroy the factory, a metalbender would have been just what you needed."

"What?" Was that why Toph was annoyed? "You were asleep, Toph! And if I woke you, it would have risked waking Sokka."

"Whatever. Let's just save the town from your mistake."

She felt Aang grasp her arm to stop her and get her attention. "Toph—if it had been you I found, instead of Katara—I would have done the same thing for you, and more."

Toph paused and turned back to him, a slightly softer look on her face. "Really?"

"Really."

Overall, helping the people of Jang Hui was much like one of their old on-the-road missions—it could be listed along with saving Makapu from a volcanic eruption, and escorting refugees to Ba Sing Se. They worked as a team, using waterbending and earthbending to separate the river from the waste that polluted it.

* * *

><p>A few nights later, they were setting up camp in a different deserted area outside of a town. While looking over the calendar and schedule, Sokka suddenly brightened up with excitement. "Hey, there's something happening tonight!"<p>

"What is it?" Katara asked.

"It's something else I found out at the planetarium. Just wait and watch."

"Watch for what?" Toph asked.

"It should start soon. You can go to sleep if you want, Toph, you won't be able to see it; but I think you guys will like this."

That just made Toph decide to stay up as long as the others.

Aang was the first one to notice. "Hey!" He pointed up at the sky. "I saw a shooting star!"

"It's starting," Sokka announced.

In the next few minutes the number of stars moving across the sky increased. Katara was delighted. "It's a meteor shower!"

Toph sat up straight, frowning. "I'm sorry, did you say _meat shower_?"

Sokka burst out laughing. Aang and Katara laughed too, until they saw Toph's confused and annoyed and dangerous look.

"A _meteor_ shower. Like, falling stars?"

Toph's expression was blank.

"Er—you know what stars are, right?"

"Vaguely. They're up there with the sun and moon and clouds. Out of sight and out of mind."

Something occurred to Sokka for the first time. "Do you know what we've been talking about, with the solar eclipse coming?"

"I know the firebenders won't be able to bend when that happens."

Sokka tried to explain it in simple terms. "Well, every month, the moon grows, then shrinks and disappears, and then grows again."

"That's not quite true," Katara corrected. "The moon is always the same size. But it looks to us as though it's changing, because the earth casts a shadow on it."

"Shadow," Toph echoed. Katara felt embarrassed, realizing that that must be another foreign concept to her.

"Um … do you understand what light is?" Aang tried.

"Sure. I can feel sunlight."

"Well … think of it this way. If it's windy you feel the wind blowing on you; but if someone stands in front of you, they block the wind. Light works the same way.

"So, imagine Katara's the moon, you're the earth, and—Prince Zuko's the sun."

Sokka and Katara shot him weird looks. "What? It makes sense—it's their elements' planets," Aang said with an innocent shrug.

"It's easier for me to picture people than planets," Toph admitted.

"Okay. You're the earth, and you can feel Zuko's heat and light. But then Katara moves between you, and she blocks the sun. That's a solar eclipse. And that's what cuts off firebenders' power."

"Interesting," Toph observed. Truthfully, the idea that a person's bending could be cut off because some strange objects were moving in the sky seemed crazy; but then, it was a crazy world. "Is that normal?"

"Eclipses are rare," Sokka conceded, "but not unheard of."

"Hey, if waterbenders have the moon, earthbenders have the earth, and firebenders have the sun—what do airbenders have?"

Aang looked thoughtful. "I guess we have outer space," he said, only half joking.

"Is outer space the same thing as the sky?" Toph asked.

"Well … I think it goes beyond what we can see in the sky." Aang turned his head to look at Toph lying next to him. "Do you know how deep the earth goes, Toph?"

"No. No one does."

"And no one knows how far outer space goes, either."

"There's more of outer space," Sokka said confidently. "We know the earth—our planet, I mean—is round, like a ball."

"Stop," Katara cut in. "You'll just make it more confusing. Can we just enjoy seeing this? This is amazing to watch."

"Kind of makes you realize how insignificant we are," Sokka murmured.

Toph grunted. "You've seen nothing once, you've seen it a thousand times."

A moment later something happened that made Sokka exclaim, "You've never not seen this!"

One of the stars fell as a meteorite, landing and igniting close to the town—too close for it to be safe. Hero instinct kicked in, as Katara, Toph, and Aang worked together to contain and extinguish the fire, by way of earthbending and waterbending. Only Sokka was left with nothing to do to help.

* * *

><p>Sokka figured that his training with a swordsmaster made him even with Aang and Katara, who had each caused the group to spend several days in a single place instead of adhering to the original schedule. He would just train for a day or two, and then maybe get a sword of his own to use afterwards. The others agreed to wait while he sought out Master Piandao.<p>

It wasn't long before the three of them were bored by themselves.

"So where are we going next? We're starting from here …" Katara said, pinpointed where she thought they were located.

"No," Aang said, pointing to a different spot on the map, "we're on this island."

Toph lay down on the ground. "You noodle-brains don't know what you're doing." And she couldn't try to help them, either. "I miss Sokka."

Suddenly Katara perked up as she thought of a sarcastic quip. "Ooh, I got one! If you miss him so much, _why don't you marry him?"_

The joke was met with silence. Aang felt extremely awkward, while Toph's expression remained blank. Then Toph spoke up offhandedly. "I missed Aang when he was in that coma. Does that mean I should marry him?"

Aang let out a laugh, trying not to sound nervous. "Ha ha! Ha ha … ha."

Toph folded her arms. "I didn't know it was _that_ funny," she muttered.

"What?"

"Never mind."

Katara spoke up, tactfully changing the subject. "Toph, can I braid your hair?"

Toph sat up, leaning back on her hands. "Really, Sweetness? You're that bored?"

"Please? I haven't done that since we went to that party in Ba Sing Se."

"How about you show me how to do it myself?"

Katara thought for a moment. "I've got it. Aang, I'll show you how to braid Toph's hair; then you can show her how to braid my hair."

Aang blinked. "Oh—okay." He hadn't been expecting to be pulled into this. Not that he minded seeing Toph's hair down. He remembered the last time he'd seen it down, that day in Ba Sing Se …

Katara's hands were quick at the practiced motion, though she tried to slow it down to show Aang how it worked. It was easier than he'd expected.

"You _could_ put this into a bun, like you usually have, Toph," Katara pointed out, pulling the braid up and around where Toph usually had a headband in place.

"I think it looks nice this way," Aang offered truthfully.

"How about instead of doting on it, you show me how to do it now?" Toph suggested.

"Okay, okay." Katara and Toph switched places so that the older girl was sitting with her back to the others.

Aang divided Katara's long, thick hair into three parts. Then he glanced nervously at Toph. "Okay, um—I'm gonna stand behind you, okay Toph?"

"Sure."

He came around behind Toph, who scooted up closer to Katara. Aang took each of Toph's hands in his own and guided them to the outer bunches of hair. Toph wasn't sure whose heart was beating faster when his chest was almost pressed against her back, his arms aligned with hers, his hands holding each of hers.

"See, you just cross each outer strand over the middle … it's actually pretty simple …"

"I've got it."

Aang let go of her hands and took a step back, putting the distance back between them. After several long minutes, Toph had put Katara's hair in a long, thick, somewhat tousled braid, not quite like the one Aang used to see her wear all the time.

Toph fingered both plaits, feeling the pattern that she and Katara had made in each other's hair. "So, you could braid anything?"

"Pretty much," Katara confirmed. "I've heard of girls making bracelets this way—it's supposed to be a sign of friendship."

"Like how a necklace shows that you're engaged?" Aang remembered.

Katara hesitated. "Well …maybe … I guess … not exactly."

"Well, that was fun while it lasted," Toph said.

"Ooh, was that sarcasm?" Katara quipped excitedly.

Aang sighed and lay down on his side. He saw some of the deteriorating wood from the abandoned shed they had taken shelter near. Suddenly the wood gave him an idea. He found a knife among Sokka's belongings, took a decent piece of wood and started carving into it.

"What are you doing?" Katara asked curiously.

"Making a new flute." He'd had one some months ago, but it had been lost with their other belongings when Appa was stolen.

"That's a great idea! Then you can keep us entertained."

Before long Aang was finished and tested out the instrument. It sounded decent; at least it could play various notes when he wanted. He tryied to play by ear what he could remember of a certain song. He could just get the basic melody.

Aang came over and sat next to Toph. "Hey, Toph, do you recognize this?" He played a fast-paced tune; and despite having heard it only once, Toph recognized easily enough.

When Toph answered, she kept her voice low. "Is that … the song that we danced to, back in the cave?"

Aang stopped playing long enough to say, "Yep."

"Sounds good."

"Really?" Aang was surprised but pleased. Compliments or kind words from Toph were few and far between, but that meant that when she did give them, they were truthful and even more meaningful.

"Can you show me how to play that thing? I've never used a musical instrument before."

Aang laughed. "Sure! I'll teach you anything you want. I mean, it'll never mean as much as you teaching me earthbending, but I can still try."

Katara watched from a distance, with a sweet and amused smile on her face, while Aang showed Toph how to hold the flute and control the sound by placing certain fingers on certain holes. If Sokka were here, he probably would have teased them or ruined their moment, just as he had in Ba Sing Se. She, on the other hand, knew when it was best to stay silent and simply watch.

* * *

><p>It was Toph who alerted them that their waiting was over. "Sokka's coming!" she announced when she heard his footsteps.<p>

It turned out that he wasn't done training, but rather needed their help. He needed to make his own sword, and he knew what material he wanted to use for it: the meteorite that had fallen the other night.

Together they hauled the huge stone to Master Piandao's palace. To their great luck, they were allowed to stay until Sokka had finished making his sword; then Piandao ceremoniously presented the new weapon to him, praising his hard work and qualities as a swordsman.

Then Sokka blew it—his cover, that was. He humbly and sorrowfully confessed that he had lied about being Fire Nation in order to be accepted as a student. "I'm sorry," he finished.

Piandao's response was to frown and turn away. "I'm sorry, too."

That exchange sounded vaguely familiar to Katara; but she couldn't place it, because the next thing they knew, Piandao had pulled his own sword out on Sokka. The trio leapt to help Sokka, but he held up a hand to stop them. "No. This is my fight, alone."

Piandao stated that they would take it outside to make it a formal duel. Katara remembered Iroh telling her about Zuko's Agni Kais, and started to feel sick at the thought of Sokka being in a similar kind of duel.

Both Sokka and Piandao surprised them all. Sokka very nearly beat Piandao—the fight ranged all over the grounds, and Piandao continually pointed out Sokka's good techniques—but eventually the master knocked his pupil's sword out of his hands. Sokka landed on his back, with Piandao holding him at swordpoint. The others started to rush to intervene, but then Piandao swung his sword away from Sokka.

"Excellent work, Sokka." He signaled to the butler on the steps, who threw his scabbard at him, so that it slid back onto the sword. "I think I'm a little old to be fighting the Avatar."

The three benders dropped their stances, exchanging shocked glances. "How did you know?" Aang asked. He wondered if this was someone like Jeong Jeong, a Fire National who had been willing to help them rather than harm them.

"Oh, I've been around a while. You pick things up. Of course, I knew from the beginning that Sokka was Water Tribe."

"But why would you agree to train someone from the Water Tribe?" Katara asked.

Piandao looked at her and answered sincerely. "The way of the sword doesn't belong to any one nation. Knowledge of the arts belongs to us all." He handed his own sword to his butler and pulled Sokka's new sword out of the ground to return it to him. "Sokka, you must continue your training on your own. If you stay on this path, I know that one day you will be an even greater master than I am."

It was one of the proudest moments of Sokka's still young life. Now he had a new skill, something that set him apart, an achievement that he could tell Hakoda and the other warriors about.

Katara stared at the two swordsmen in wonder. Piandao reminded her very much of Iroh; they both had a way of speaking that was wise, serious and proud, with a little wit thrown in. Though the firebender hadn't been her master, he had taught her a lot while she was with him on Zuko's ship.

The others started to head back to the main entrance, but Katara hung back. "You guys go ahead; I'll be just a minute." She approached Piandao. "Master Piandao? Could I speak with you about something?"

Katara knew she was going out on a limb, trusting a Fire Nation local. But Sokka trusted him, and if he'd wanted to turn them in he would have done so already; Katara thought it would be safe.

When the others had left, Katara asked him, "Do you know anything about General Iroh, the Dragon of the West?"

Piandao's answer was careful but truthful. "We've met. I once taught a relative of his, the Crown Prince Zuko."

Katara was surprised, but then realized that made sense, when she remembered his skill as the Blue Spirit. "That explains the dual swords," she murmured. "Anyway—do you know what happened to him after the Earth Kingdom fell?"

"I believe he's been sent to the capital city's prison, close enough that the Fire Lord can keep an eye on him."

"I see. Thank you, Master."

"You and your friends are welcome here. By the way—I wanted Sokka to have this, to remember me by." Piandao reached into the folds of his robes and took out a small drawstring bag. "Would you give this to him?"

Katara took it in both of her hands and bowed. "Of course."

She found the others waiting for her just outside the gates. "This is something he wanted you to have," she told him as she handed him the bag.

Sokka emptied the contents into his hand and held up the small item—merely a token. "It's a Pai Sho tile."

"The white lotus," Aang recognized.

Katara stared at the game piece. She remembered the first time she had ever played Pai Sho. Wasn't the white lotus tile the one that Iroh had lost, and gone to such great lengths to find? Hadn't a game piece like this one caused Zuko to browse the pirates' ship, setting up those pivotal encounters? The memories and ideas made her head spin and her heart ache.

"What does it mean?" she asked finally. It seemed Piandao valued this tile, just like Iroh. Did it mean something?

"I have no idea," Sokka answered. Aang followed his gaze back to the gate doors, which they now noticed had a design similar to the White Lotus surrounding the typical Fire Nation symbol.

"Ooh, that reminds me," Sokka said suddenly. "Toph, I thought you might like this, since you're probably never had a chance to bend space earth before." He reached into his back pocket and presented her with a leftover piece of the meteorite.

Aang saw the way her face lit up as she took it from him. "Sweet! Check this out." She held the small rock between her hands, experimenting with bending it into different shapes.

"You could wear it, like a bracelet or something," Sokka suggested as they started to walk away.

Toph frowned thoughtfully. "It's a friendship bracelet, right?" she asked.

"Sure, I guess."

Neither of them saw Aang smile at this, as though reassured.

Katara fell into step next to her brother. "Sokka? Tell me again where I play into the invasion."

He blinked at her. "Well, you're one of our waterbenders, so we'll need you most during the naval stage. But you'll bring water to fight when we're on land. … Why do you ask?"

Katara looked him in the eye. "I want to break Iroh out of prison."


	37. Owing a Debt

_Published May 6, 2013_

**Author's Note:** I'm really sorry this chapter took so long! This story reached two milestones since the last update: it surpassed 300 reviews (thank you readers!), and passed the two-year anniversary of the day I started posting this story! In that time we've progressed two seasons. I wish I could go faster, but I have a lot of real life events going on at the same time. That said, I probably won't be able to update this again until after the summer begins.

Here's something important to keep in mind during this chapter: In case you didn't catch on, Zuko never sent the three-eyed assassin after Aang. He couldn't do that after what he went through with Katara and even with the others in the group. So, things play out differently since Combustion Man doesn't have a role.

* * *

><p>"Owing a Debt"<p>

I know what my heart is like  
>Since your love died:<br>It is like a hollow ledge  
>Holding a little pool<br>Left there by the tide,  
>A little tepid pool,<br>Drying inward from the edge.  
>~ "Ebb" by Edna St. Vincent Millay<p>

* * *

><p>Zuko had been indifferent, at best, about going to Ember Island with the girls. The only thing that might be good about it was the chance to spend time with Mai. But he was disappointed: she didn't react to any of his attempts to please her. And then at that neighbor's party, he snapped.<p>

In the ensuing argument, Mai spelled out the things she hated about him. "Your temper's out of control. You blow up over every little thing. You're so impatient and hot-headed and angry."

She couldn't understand. His attitude was impatient because he'd spent three years trying to chase the same goal. He was hot-headed because he was passionate. And he was angry because … well, because of everything, really.

"At least I feel something—as opposed to you. You have no passion for anything. You're just a big _blah_." He knew it was mean to say, but he almost didn't care; maybe being mean to Mai would even make her angry or hurt enough to show some emotion.

But she did no such thing. She simply turned away. "It's over, Zuko. We're done."

Zuko merely looked at her, glaring. "If that's what _you_ want, it's fine by me." With that he walked out of the house.

One of the punk neighbors called out after him. "Have fun by yourself, _loser_ boy!" They had no idea. If they knew how often Zuko had been alone in the past few years, or even months or weeks …

He almost wished Katara was here. But then again, if she were here, he would probably want to be by himself.

He found himself walking up to his own family's beach house, which hadn't been used for years now. He hadn't planned on coming here at any point in the vacation, but now that he was alone, he realized that this might be his only chance to do so.

Katara would have appreciated the weight of memories that the beach house held. She would have comforted him, through words or simply through her presence, when he contemplated how much had changed.

A while later, Azula came up to the house and, in a strange moment of sibling mutuality, invited him to come back down to the beach with her. They found Ty Lee and Mai sitting there, apparently having also sought refuge from the social atmosphere of the party. Zuko avoided talking to Mai by busying himself with making a fire in the sand. He made a trip back to the old beach house to find flammable materials to burn.

Ty Lee noticed the paper and wood items he brought down, including a fine portrait of the royal siblings with their parents. "Are you going to burn that?"

"Maybe. You're the one who said you were cold."

"But that's a painting of your family."

"Do you think I care?" Zuko snapped.

"I think you do."

"You don't know me, so why don't you mind your own business?" He turned away from her.

Ty Lee looked down, and spoke softly. "I know you."

"No, you don't," Zuko griped. "You're stuck in your little Ty Lee world where everything is great all the time, and you don't have to think about anything that's going on in other people's lives."

Mai intervened at this. "Zuko, leave her alone."

But Zuko didn't stop; he even imitated Ty Lee's cheerful voice. "'I'm so pretty, look at me. I can walk on my hands. Whoo!'" He did a handstand, then let himself fall to the sand in annoyance. "Circus freak."

Azula laughed, cruel and amused.

Something rare and different flared up inside Ty Lee. It was some animosity in her that she hadn't shown in an argument for years. "Yes, I'm a circus freak. Go ahead and laugh all you want. You want to know _why_ I joined the circus?"

"Here we go," Azula said carelessly.

"Do you have any idea what my home life was like, growing up with six sisters who look exactly like me? It was like I didn't even have my own name." She fell back to the ground again, crying now. "I joined the circus because I was scared of spending the rest of my life as part of a matched set. At least I'm different now." She looked up at them, her face set in a defiant expression, though her eyes still had tears in them. "'Circus freak' is a _compliment!_"

"Guess that explains why you need ten boyfriends, too," Mai said sarcastically.

Ty Lee straightened up and looked at her angrily. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Attention issues," Mai clarified. "You couldn't get enough attention when you were a kid, so you're trying to make up for it now."

"Well, what's _your_ excuse, Mai? You were an only child for fifteen years, but even with all that attention, your aura is this dingy, pasty, gray …"

"I don't believe in auras," Mai said dismissively.

Zuko stood up. "Yeah, you don't believe in anything." He could name it now, what it was that Mai lacked: _Conviction_. Even Azula had more of it than Mai did.

"Oh, well, I'm sorry I can't be as high-strung and crazy as the rest of you."

Zuko walked closer to the fire. "I'm sorry, too. I wish you _would_ be high-strung and crazy for once." Mai looked away as Zuko stepped closer. "I wish you would believe in something." As he said it, the key word—_believe—_triggered a memory. He glanced away for a moment, recalling a long-ago conversation, before turning to face Mai again. "Do you believe in this war?"

The question was met with a shocked silence. Ty Lee gaped at him, and Mai finally looked at him. "Where is this coming from?"

"I want to know if there's anything you _do_ believe in." Zuko sat down cross-legged in the sand, resting his hands on his knees, and looked intently at Mai. "Do you have any opinion of this war? Did you believe in what you did to help Azula?"

"You're walking on a fine line, Zuko," Azula said pointedly.

"Just answer the question!" Zuko said.

"I don't know!" Mai exclaimed. "I did what Azula invited me to do—what the Fire Nation needed me to do. Why would you even ask that?"

"Someone else asked me that once." Zuko folded his arms. "I still don't know what my answer is."

"Who asked you that?" Azula asked.

Ty Lee looked at him, her expression curious and uncharacteristically concerned. "Was it the Water Tribe girl?"

"No—" Zuko stopped, shocked when he registered what Ty Lee had said. "Wait, what?"

"The waterbender who was friends with the Avatar. You guys liked each other, didn't you?" Ty Lee said.

Zuko got to his feet again, as though ready to defend himself. "What did _she_ tell you?" Had Katara revealed more than just Zuko and Iroh's location in Ba Sing Se?

"Oh, she tried to deny it," Azula said carelessly. "But she didn't do very well."

"So, it's true?" Ty Lee asked. "She was your girlfriend?"

"She was _not_ my girlfriend!" Zuko shouted—the second time he had ever said those words. He paused, and though his angry expression did not change, his voice became calmer and more resolved. "But she _was_ my friend." He didn't care that what he was saying could be treasonous, or that these girls were liable to inform someone against him for talking that way.

"How do you figure that?" Azula asked.

"How did it happen?" Mai asked.

Zuko looked at them for a long moment; he had to stop and remember, and gauge how much he could say. He knew there was some real danger in telling them, but once he started, the reasons kept coming out. "We talked. Uncle made her tea." That experience in itself must have made her a permanent friend in Iroh's book. "We helped each other—I've lost track of how many times. She had every reason to hate me; but for some reason she found it in herself to care about me. And she told me it was _okay_ to care."

"So I was right," Ty Lee said. "You do care … about her, and your family."

Zuko scowled. He was becoming an open book again, just as he had been with Katara when they argued on his ship. Even when she wasn't with him, she still made him open up when it would be safer to keep things to himself.

"And I thought you couldn't be more pathetic," Azula said sarcastically.

Zuko rounded on his sister. "You want to know why I fell for her?" Zuko was almost yelling; he seemed to finally be releasing the emotions he had been bottling up for so many weeks. "It's because she saw through my pretenses; she saw the real me, and for some reason she liked it. And when she learned about my past, she didn't just pity me; she understood me—or at least tried to." That was more than Mai had done for him. "And I could actually relate to her, because she's suffered too. She knows what it's like to not be normal."

He turned to look between Mai and Ty Lee. "You know something else? She can think for herself. She doesn't blindly follow orders or do just what's expected of her; she thinks about what she has to do, and what she wants to do. Meanwhile you just do whatever Azula tells you."

Katara didn't just think for herself; she had encouraged him to do the same. That was why she had frightened and frustrated him: he lost his footing whenever he doubted himself, his country, and his people.

_You're going to inherit so much power—and you don't even seem to care_.

That wasn't true. He did care. He wanted the war over too—they had just chosen different ways of trying to end it.

"Well, what about you, Zuko?" Ty Lee retorted. "You spent three years hunting the Avatar, all because your father—the Fire Lord—told you to."

"There are some things you don't have a choice about," Mai said quietly.

Zuko glared at the two of them. "Don't talk to me about that! You have no idea—why I did that—none of you gets it." Zuko turned away. "For so long, I thought if my dad accepted me, I'd be happy. I'm back home now; my dad talks to me. He even thinks I'm a hero! Everything should be perfect, right? I should be happy, but I'm not. I'm angrier than ever and I don't know why!"

"Well, there's a simple question you need to answer, then," Azula said. "Who are you angry at?"

"No one," Zuko said, looking down. "I'm just angry."

"Yeah, who are you angry at, Zuko?" Mai demanded.

"Everyone …" Zuko covered his ears, his frustration growing with the volume of their questions.

"Is it Dad?" Azula asked.

"No, no!" Zuko said quickly. He had never been angry at his father—at least never consciously so.

"Is it the waterbender?" Mai asked.

"She has a name," Zuko defended. "It's Katara."

"Well, are you angry at her?"

"I don't know …"

"Your uncle?" Ty Lee asked.

"Me?" Azula suggested.

"No, no, no, no!"

"Then who? Who are you angry at?"

Finally Zuko broke in. "I'm angry at myself!" he yelled, throwing his arms down. This motion caused the fire to explode upward in a column of flame. Zuko felt the heat, but unlike the girls, he didn't flinch or turn away. He just stood with his fists clenched and his anger coursing through them. When the fire burned out, leaving the group mostly in darkness, he almost felt as though that negative emotion had been released, or at least accepted.

After a moment Azula asked the question they were all wondering. "Why?"

Zuko looked out at the ocean, just as he once had with Katara, and again with Mai. "Because I'm confused," he said quietly. "Because I'm not sure I know the difference between right and wrong." Maybe there was more, but if he couldn't even admit it to himself, there was no way he could name it to the girls.

The girls didn't know what they were supposed to say to that.

"Those were marvelous performances," Azula said sarcastically.

"Shut up, Azula," Mai said. Both Zuko and Ty Lee looked surprised at this defense.

"I guess you wouldn't understand, would you, Azula?" Zuko said, turning around to glare at his sister. "Because you're just so perfect."

"Well, yes, I guess you're right. I don't have sob stories like the rest of you. I could sit here and complain how our mom liked Zuko more than me, but I don't really care."

Zuko was somewhat surprised. It was the first time he'd heard Azula mention their mother, at least since he came home. For the first time, he wondered if his sister felt the same weight of memories that the beach house held for him.

"My own mother … thought I was a monster." Azula stared into the fire pit's dying embers, oblivious to her friends' concerned looks. Then she seemed to catch herself, and her tone became nonchalant again. "She was right, of course. But it still hurt."

That was definitely the first time anyone had heard Azula admit a time she she had been hurt.

Ty Lee spoke up softly. "What Lo and Li said came true," she realized. "The beach _did_ help us learn about ourselves." She smiled, picking up a stone that had been smoothed by the sand and waves. "I feel all smoothed. I'll always remember this."

Mai stood up and walked over to Zuko. "Can we talk?" she requested. "Just you and me?"

Zuko looked at her, then nodded. "Sure." It might be good for them to talk, instead of yelling or aguing.

She took hold of his hand as they went further down the beach, away from Azula and Ty Lee. Zuko wondered vaguely at this gesture, after they had apparently broken up. It was nice, he decided.

"You were the only one of us who didn't share something about ourselves back there," Zuko said offhandedly.

"What? Do you want a teary confession about how rough my childhood was? Well, it wasn't." Mai looked at the beach ahead of them as she spoke. "I was a rich only child who got anything I wanted. As long as I behaved … and sat still … and didn't speak unless spoken to." Zuko thought that sounded almost similar to his own childhood; he'd been severely punished just for speaking out of turn. "My mother said I had to keep out of trouble. We had my dad's political career to think about."

Zuko spoke up slowly, as he started to understand. "So, you were taught to keep your thoughts and emotions to yourself. That's why you don't try to express them now."

Mai finally glanced at him. "How would you like it if I was more like you, and got angry about everything I don't like?"

"I don't know … maybe it's a bender thing. My uncle said a lot of fire—and waterbending—is fueled by emotion." He didn't know why he had added that bit; it seemed more fitting to the truth. But he guessed correctly that the word "waterbending" brought another dangerous topic back to Mai's mind.

"I didn't mention it, because I didn't know if any of it was true," Mai said. "But … before you came home, Azula heard rumors about you … some people who'd worked in the Fire Navy said you had a waterbender prisoner at one point."

"What?" Zuko couldn't believe it. He wondered if that was another reason why he had been wanted for treason …

"When we captured her in Ba Sing Se—" Zuko looked up sharply at her, his stomach twisting at the memory. "—Ty Lee mentioned it, and it made her nervous. Azula seemed to think that you guys, well, _had_ something. But you didn't seem to care, so I forgot about it." She kicked at the sand under her feet. "I didn't realize you felt so much … or went through so much with her."

"I spent three years on an insane chase," Zuko said tonelessly. "I went through a lot that you don't know about." He paused, looking wistful. "I wish you could meet her, Mai—without fighting, I mean. I feel like you two could learn from each other."

Mai looked at him out of the corners of her eyes. "Do you miss her?"

Zuko sighed. "I don't even know … There were a few times when I missed her, while I was still banished." He glanced over at Mai. "I missed you, too. When I heard that you were helping Azula track us … I wondered if I'd see you again. Part of me hoped I would."

"Like part of you hoped to see her again?"

Zuko was annoyed. "I never said that. I saw her almost every time I saw the Avatar; it usually wasn't a pleasant interaction."

"I don't get you, Zuko. Do you always want what you can't have?"

"I don't know what I want anymore."

_I have everything I always wanted, but it's not at all how I thought it would be_. He had a shrewd feeling that Iroh had understood what he meant; if only he would open up to Zuko again …

Mai stopped walking. Her arms were folded, but her expression was more pensive than angry. "Where do we go from here?"

"I don't know …" Zuko looked at her cautiously. "Did you mean what you said, about it being over?"

"I don't know. Did you mean what you said about me?"

Zuko sighed. "I did … but you're right. I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry that I did."

"So what do you want to do?" Mai asked. When she sensed his hesitation, she cut in, "You don't have to spare my feelings. Just decide what it is you want, and tell me."

Zuko felt a little unnerved by Mai's directness. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to find the right words.

"I'm sorry, Mai. I just … I don't want to lead you on."

Mai looked at him steadily. "Explain," she said.

"I guess … I like you, and I like being with you. I'm just not sure I feel as much for you as you seem to do for me. Can you understand that?"

Mai pressed her lips into a thin line. "It's the waterbender, isn't it?"

Zuko was caught off guard. "I—it's not—"

"You still like her." It was a statement, not a question.

"No … I just don't feel confident in a relationship, after the way that ended. I'm sorry."

The truth was, he didn't connect with Mai as much as he had with Katara. Katara understood suffering, while Mai had grown up pampered in the Fire Court. Katara was passionate, like him, while Mai was indifferent and unemotional. Katara was appreciative and optimistic, while Mai was always bored and dissatisfied.

True, she had shown a different side of herself to Zuko since he returned. She was softer with him; Zuko actually made her happy, a feeling she didn't often experience.

Mai sighed. Zuko had gotten used to that sound, since she made it so often. Except now she wasn't just gloomy; she was … disappointed. But she looked resigned. "I appreciate your honesty."

"Thank you. I appreciate you … being mature about this. And, Mai—I hope we can still be friends." He hesitated, and then admitted, "You were one of the people I missed most when I left the Fire Nation."

"Yeah … I missed you, too."

They hugged each other, a brief embrace—Zuko wasn't sure which of them started it. Then Mai pulled away and started walking back to the beach house. Of course, she would want to be the one to leave.

Zuko sighed, watching her go. He told himself it was for the best. He couldn't pretend to love her if his heart wasn't really in it. Maybe someday, but not now. His heart was too heavy to love again.

He looked out again to the moon and the ocean. He wondered if he would ever be able to look upon these parts of nature without being reminded of a night on his ship, or a battle over spirits, or anything connected with the girl who loved them more than anyone else he knew.

"I miss you," Zuko confessed. It seemed that everyone he really cared about—everyone who actually understood him—either was taken away, or left him. First his mother, then Katara, Iroh, and now Mai.

When he went back up the porch steps, he heard someone speak softly. "Zuko?"

He turned, and saw Ty Lee's head hanging upside down just outside the porch ceiling. The acrobat swiftly flipped herself back so she landed on the porch in front of him.

"Are you and Mai okay?"

"We're fine." Zuko barely looked at her, and turned back to leave.

"Wait." Her hand grasped his, and pressed something small and thin to his palm. "I found this after you left. I think you still need it—and Azula might too." When Zuko turned in surprise to look at her, she was already bounding away into the house, while he stood immobile on the threshold.

The paper in his hand was the remains of the picture Zuko had planned to use as kindling. At some point during their arguments and confessions on the beach, Ty Lee had pulled it out of the pile without anyone noticing.

Zuko wondered if Ty Lee had been his friend all along.

He gingerly wiped the sand off of the paper and slipped it into the front of his shirt. He would bring it back to the old beach house tomorrow. It could stay there.

* * *

><p>Team Avatar had found a place to camp out that seemed like a private getaway: a crater in an island that had a natural pool. With the hottest weather they had ever experienced fully upon them, everyone was eager to get in the cool water.<p>

Toph's voice rang out over the water. "Aang, I know swimming is fun and all, but do you really think you should be exposing yourself like that? Cover up!"

"What?" Aang said innocently. He was floating in the water with Momo resting on his stomach. "I'm wearing trunks … and you can't even see! What difference does it make to you?"

Toph's cheeks felt hot, much to her chagrin. "It's the tattoos I'm worried about!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms up in frustration. "What if someone sees you?"

Katara spoke up. "There are walls all around us. It's completely safe."

Aang dove back under the surface, and came up again near the rock where Toph was sitting. "Hey, Toph. Remember when we were in the Serpent's Pass, and I told you I'd teach you how to swim?"

Toph tensed slightly but tried to act nonchalant. "Yeah, I remember."

"This is the perfect time and place for it!"

"I don't know … dancing is one thing, but this is a life-or-death skill. Can I even learn it in one day?"

Aang considered. "Probably not … but there's no reason why we shouldn't start now."

Toph exhaled, getting to her feet. "Fine." She carefully walked off the rock and onto the shore, then started walking into the water. Before it went past her waist, she bent her knees, crouching down until only her head remained above the surface. It had been a while since she was in water; she didn't care about bathing as much as the others. Of course in her old life she had been made to bathe regularly; but her parents had worried about the chance of her drowning, so they had never her allowed enough water for her to submerge herself in, much less given her the chance to try holding her breath underwater.

"I'm right here," Aang said, just behind her. Toph turned her head slightly in his direction. "We'll stay in the shallow water for a while. Try holding your breath, and just go under the surface for a few seconds. Feel what it's like to be completely in water."

"Do I have to take my feet off the sand, too?" She was somewhat sarcastic.

"If you don't mind," Aang said modestly.

Toph wanted to sigh or huff, but instead she sucked in a deep breath of air, pinched her nose, and ducked under the surface. When she came up less than a minute later, she asked, "Should I be trying to stay under the water, or above it?"

"Um …" Aang scratched his bald head, trying to think it through. "I guess it makes more sense to try staying above. Before swimming, we can try floating. Try lying on your back on the water."

"Are you serious?"

"It works! If you stand vertically, you'll sink, but if you spread out horizontally—I don't know, I guess your weight spreads out or something."

Toph spread out her arms and tried to tilt her body up; she even let the back of her head touch the water; but her feet stayed on the floor. "I just don't feel like it's going to hold me up."

"Er …" Aang hesitated, wondering if this would be too awkward; but they had trained and even danced together, so this shouldn't be that much different. "Do you want me to hold you up while you try?"

Toph arched upward, sitting on the sandy bottom, her head dripping. "Forget it! I don't need someone holding me up like a baby."

"Okay, okay!" Aang backed off. "If you want to do it yourself—"

"No, I'm done. Getting wet was fun enough." Toph stood and tread water as she walked back onto the shore, where Sokka was drying in the sun.

Aang followed her. "Look, Toph … everyone needs help at some point. Needing it, and asking for it, doesn't mean you're weak."

"That's the one thing I learned from Iroh," Sokka piped up. "Something like, 'A good warrior knows his limitations, and doesn't refuse help.'"

"He told you that?" Toph said.

"Uh-huh."

That reminded Toph of another piece of Iroh's wisdom. _There is nothing wrong with letting people who love you help you._

Toph took a deep breath, almost sighing. "All right. I'll do it."

While the two preteens worked on floating, Katara approached Sokka, wringing the water out of her hair. "Speaking of Iroh—we need to talk about my idea."

It had been hard to discern Sokka's reaction to hearing Katara's suggestion. The first thing he did, once they had made camp afterwards, was to look at their most current map of the Fire Nation Capitol, Caldera. ("We really need to buy a more up-to-date map.")

"Okay, as far as I can tell, the prison is in one of the craters of the volcano. I'm just guessing that it's going to be well-guarded; but if the guards are firebenders, you _might_ have a chance of getting through during the eclipse." He hadn't sounded confident, and he hadn't said whether it was all right for her to leave the main battle to go on this minor mission.

Now, Katara met his gaze, her eyes somber and sincere. "I know you don't really like him, but Iroh taught me a lot, and put himself at risk to help us."

"How much did he teach you?" Sokka asked curiously.

Katara thought it over. "Well, the first thing he taught me was how to play Pai Sho. Then there were a couple times when he talked to Zuko and me about the elements, how they coexist … and there were a lot of little things, too." Things like how to get to know a person, and how to weigh choices based on how they would affect the future.

"What if it was Piandao in his place?" Katara asked hypothetically. "Wouldn't you do anything you could to help him?"

Sokka melted a little at this. He had a lot of respect and even affection for his swordsmaster, and he hadn't known him nearly as long as Katara had known Iroh. He looked sideways at his sister. "Does it really mean that much to you?"

Aang spoke up from the water, where he was holding his hands under Toph's back to support her. "He's the reason Katara and I escaped Ba Sing Se. And that means _we're _the reason he was captured. We owe this to him."

Rather than looking thankful for this support, Katara looked pensive. "What? Did I say something?" Aang asked. He had thought that those were already among her reasons for wanting to undertake this mission.

"Remember when Azula shot Iroh with lightning, and we argued about whether or not I should heal him? I told you I wanted to help because I owed it to them. But now … the truth is, this stopped being about debts a long time ago. We've helped each other so often that I've lost track of what favors we owe each other. Even if he hadn't helped us that recently, I would still want to help him, because I care about him—as much as I care about Gran-Gran and Master Pakku."

Toph came out of the water and sat down next to the siblings. "Why are you so unconvinced, anyway?" she asked Sokka.

"I don't know … I just don't see it as a mission that should be as high a priority as helping the invasion force. You know that once we defeat the Fire Lord, Iroh would be released anyway."

"Maybe," Katara put in, "that is, _if_ the rest of the victors are willing to let a Fire Nation general go free. But, if the invasion is going badly, we could use the Dragon of the West on our side."

Sokka couldn't argue that. Iroh's firebending prowess had saved them twice, and he had been a witness the first time.

Suddenly Katara thought of something. "Oh, and one other thing. Sooner or later, Aang's going to have to learn firebending. Iroh is the best firebender we know, and one of the few in the world who would be willing to teach the Avatar."

"That's a great idea!" Aang exclaimed happily.

Katara tried not to show how much that enthusiastic reaction surprised and pleased her. It seemed to indicate that Aang had changed his mind about firebending, and would be willing to learn it when the time came.


	38. The Ties that Bind

_Published May 16, 2013_

**Important Author's Note:** I wasn't quite happy with the way I had divided up the events of this first half of the season into super long chapters. So, I moved half of the previous chapter's contents to this chapter; but there is an addition, a few scenes that I wanted to include, but couldn't put with the invasion part of the story. Also, I realized that I hadn't quite finished part of the scene from "The Runaway," so that's been improved. Thank you for your understanding.

* * *

><p>"The Ties That Bind"<p>

"I know," said Poirot. "I have heard of it. I have seen it once or twice. Love can turn to hate very easily. It is easier to hate where you have loved than it is to be indifferent where you have loved." ~ Agatha Christie, _Elephants Can Remember_

_You need to know the story of your great-grandfather's demise. It will reveal your own destiny_.

Iroh was the only one with whom Zuko had ever discussed his destiny. The letter and its surreptitious delivery made him suspicious, but he was also intrigued. Especially by the latter part; the promise of finding his own destiny was tempting—he had always sought it, and lately he had thought that he nearly fulfilled it, but now he wasn't so sure. He couldn't pass up the chance to find some clarity regarding it.

It wasn't until the following night, on the summer solstice, that Zuko found another message on the scroll, written in ink that only became visible when exposed to heat. When he threw the scroll on a lantern in frustration, more words appeared: _The Fire Sages keep the secret history in the Dragon Bone Catacombs_.

Zuko's last encounter with any of the Fire Sages had been at the Temple of Avatar Roku. He remembered that one of them, Shyu, had actually turned against the others and chose to help the Avatar, claiming it had been the Sages' original purpose. Thinking that some of the Sages in the Fire Nation Capital might have similar beliefs, Zuko chose not to ask them directly, and instead snuck into the Capital Temple and descended to the passageways underneath. There, he found a box of scrolls with a promising label: "The Last Testament of Fire Lord Sozin."

Zuko spent the remaining hours of the night in the catacombs, reading the ancient scrolls. He was amazed by the story, and even more by fact that he'd never heard it before—at least not the part about Avatar Roku and Fire Lord Sozin being such close friends. He had done so much research about the Avatars during his banishment—how had he missed that detail?

He was slightly surprised by Sozin's mournful, even regretful tone, from the beginning of the testament to the end. _As I feel my own life dimming, I can't help but think of a time when everything was so much brighter_. Sozin was regarded as the most successful Fire Lord in history; yet his words seemed to express regret. Only it was unclear exactly why—he did not say whether he regretted any of his actions regarding Roku or the war.

Zuko came to the end of the scroll, and was chilled by the last few sentences, which were so relevant to his own life. _I knew the next Avatar would be born an Air Nomad, so I wiped out the Air Temples. But somehow, the new Avatar eluded me. I wasted the remainder of my life searching in vain. I know he's hiding out there somewhere, the Fire Nation's greatest threat, the last airbender._

Sozin sounded just like Zuko, at the time when he was banished and searching fruitlessly. But he had done things that Sozin never accomplished: he had found the Avatar, seen him in person multiple times, fought him, captured him, even worked alongside him in extenuating circumstances …

Zuko shook his head, trying to clear his mind as he turned the scroll; but the parchment was at its end, and only the wooden roll was left. He frowned, disappointed and confused. "That can't be it. Where's the rest of it?" It seemed that there was no rest, except for what Azula had said about Sozin, that he died of old age.

What was Iroh playing at?

Before dawn broke, Zuko went to the prison and confronted Iroh, who, as usual, sat facing away from him. "I found the secret history—which, by the way, should be renamed 'the history most people already know'! The note said that I needed to know about my great-grandfather's death, but he was still alive in the end."

Iroh finally looked up at him, and spoke to him for the first time in months. "No … he wasn't."

"What are you talking about?"

"You have more than one great-grandfather, Prince Zuko," Iroh informed him solemnly. "Sozin was your father's grandfather. Your _mother's_ grandfather was Avatar Roku."

Zuko's eyes widened; he was shocked, but that didn't erase the anger; if anything it rekindled it, swirling the coals that were already smoldering.

He had been to the Temple of Avatar Roku. Was this the reason why he had survived and escaped when Roku's spirit destroyed the temple? Had his _great-grandfather_ been looking out for him, even in the guise of the current Avatar, Aang?

He didn't want a connection with the Avatar! He didn't need another reason to feel conflicted about how he regarded his enemies.

"_Why_ are you telling me this?" Zuko demanded.

"Because understanding the struggle between your two great-grandfathers can help you better understand the battle within yourself."

Zuko sat down on the stone floor, holding his head in his hands. Iroh continued, and his gentle lecturing tone was just as it had always been when he offered advice in the past. "Evil and good are always at war inside you, Zuko. It is your nature, your legacy. … But, there is a bright side."

Zuko looked up; though still clearly angry, he was willing to listen now. Iroh's eyes were narrowed slightly, not in anger, but in determination. "What happened generations ago can be resolved now … by _you_. Because of your legacy, you alone can cleanse the sins of our family and the Fire Nation. Born in you, along with all this strife, is the power to restore _balance_ to the world."

"I thought that was the Avatar's job," Zuko said without thinking. Then his eyes widened. Had he really just said that? That was the closest he'd ever come to real blasphemy against his country …

"It is," Iroh agreed. "And you know that the world _needs_ balance—and lacks it now, more than ever before. But no one—not even the Avatar—can achieve it alone."

"What are you really saying?" Zuko asked, sounding desperate and almost plaintive. "What should I _do_?"

"Only you can decide that." Iroh stood and turned to the wall; Zuko thought he was shunning him again; but then he did something surprising: he removed a loose brick from the wall, and removed something hidden within the niche. Iroh turned back to him, unwrapping a small bundle as he approached the bars of his cell. "This is a royal artifact. It's supposed to be worn by the crown prince."

It was an ancient, metal hair ornament, with the silhouette of a flame on either side. Zuko had seen enough pictures and statues of Roku to recognize it as the one he'd worn in his life. He accepted it, slightly awed, as Iroh passed it through the bars. Zuko looked up at him again. "Was this yours? Or Lu Ten's?"

"No; your mother brought it with her when she married your father. It's yours now, if you'll have it."

Zuko looked at the hair ornament, as though weighing its significance in his mind. "I was never supposed to be the _crown_ prince," he said morosely. He wanted to say more, but he couldn't form any words that wouldn't hurt Iroh emotionally.

Iroh was silent for a moment; Zuko was afraid that their conversation was over. But then his uncle spoke again. "Neither of us can change what has happened. But we do have some control over what _will_ happen."

Zuko slipped the hair ornament into the sleeve of his robe. Then, without a word of thanks or farewell, he turned and left the prison cell.

Later, after the shock had worn off, it occurred to him that he acted a bit ungrateful. He _had_ asked for advice. This must be Iroh's way of providing some. Only it wasn't really advice—just more information, which might be supposed to help, but at the same time served to make Zuko feel more conflicted.

He didn't want some grand legacy. Now, he just wanted to be a normal prince.

But, he had said that he wanted his destiny. And didn't he still want that?

_What that means is up to you_.

* * *

><p>The desolate island was eerie at first sight, and even more so when Toph informed them that she felt an entire village underneath the hardened lava and ash.<p>

None of the kids slept that night while Aang meditated. Katara told herself she had nothing to worry about this time—they were miles away from anyone who might want to hurt or capture him—but even so, she wanted to stay awake and alert while he was visiting the Spirit World, or wherever his spirit went while visiting Roku's past.

"Okay, this is kind of creeping me out," Toph said after a long while. She knew Aang meditated fairly often, but this time was different. It was like the difference between sensing someone who was lying down and someone who was asleep; only now, Aang's body as as good as asleep, but he still moved occasionally.

"Do they have bathrooms in the Spirit World?" Katara asked in a strained voice.

"As a matter of fact, they do not," Sokka said seriously.

Toph raised her eyebrows. "You speak as though from experience."

"Okay, see, I was the first of us to go to the Spirit World, only I couldn't really tell—but when I got out, it was like waking up after being asleep for two days."

After that they passed the time by telling Toph the story of Hei Bai, a spirit who had kidnapped humans out of anger for what people had done to his environment. Katara compared it to their adventure in a strangely spiritual Earth Kingdom swamp.

It was morning when Aang finally awoke from his trance. "It's about time!" Toph exclaimed.

Aang immediately defended Roku. "Hey, you try telling your life story in one night."

"So what did Roku tell you?" Sokka asked. "What did he want you to know?"

Aang proceeded to summarize the story that Roku had told him: that he had been childhood friends with Fire Lord Sozin, the man who started the war; that he had tried to convince the Fire Lord to give up his plans, but hadn't taken any real action to stop him (besides destroying the royal palace); and that in the end, Roku and Sozin had worked together on the very island on which they now stood. But when Roku faltered and needed help, Sozin had turned his back on the Avatar and left him to die in the volcanic eruption.

"That must have been the day I was born," Aang finished, sounding awed. The other three were similarly dumbfounded. They weren't sure which fact was more shocking: that the two men had been friends, or that the friends had turned against each other in such a terrible way.

Katara's voice rose as she spoke, incredulous. "You mean, after all Roku and Sozin went through together—even after Roku showed him mercy—Sozin betrayed him like that?" That struck a little too close to home for her.

"Maybe it runs in the family," Toph said dourly.

"No, that's wrong," Aang stated. "I don't think that was the point of what Roku showed me at all."

"Then what was the point?" Sokka asked, confused.

Aang smiled a little. "Roku was just as much Fire Nation as Sozin was, right? If anything, their story proves anyone's capable of great good, and great evil."

Sokka and Katara exchanged glances. A few months ago, Katara would have said that she already knew this; but now she didn't even know if it was true.

Aang was still talking. "Everyone, even the Fire Lord and the Fire Nation, have to be treated like they're _worth_ giving a chance. And I also think it was about friendships."

Katara wasn't so sure. If anything, the story seemed to show that a person's own willpower—or lack thereof—could end even the strongest of friendships.

A memory stirred in her mind. _"If you don't want to be—my girlfriend, or whatever, that's one thing. But I don't think I could stand to lose you as a friend."_

But he had; and it was his fault more than hers. He had pushed her away, and there was no going back now. But she was alright with that, because she knew who her real friends were.

Toph's voice was quiet. "Do you really think friendships can last more than one lifetime?"

The next thing she knew, Aang was holding her hand. "I don't see why not."

* * *

><p>Sokka was finally able to obtain a better map—a whole atlas, in fact—thanks to Toph, who had started coming up with ideas for how to earn money on the sly. She and the boys had a lot of fun over the next several days, swindling wealthy townsfolk and outsmarting the cheats who ran games of chance.<p>

This was one thing Aang loved about Toph: like him, she knew how to have fun. Not that Sokka and Katara weren't fun, but they were the leader and the caretaker, focused on long-term goals and everyday tasks.

Only Katara didn't participate in any of these schemes; and only she argued against them. After a few days, she'd had enough. "I think these scams have gone far enough."

"Okay," Sokka said soothingly, "I admit the getting-hit-by-a-cart trick was a bit low …"

"I don't want you doing _anything_ else; not even cheating cheaters."

To her surprise, Sokka let out a laugh. "This from the girl who once stole a waterbending scroll from pirates," he remarked with a smirk.

"You're kidding," Toph said. When she realized he was serious, she was rather impressed. "I may have just reached a new level of respect for you."

Instead of being flattered, Katara was annoyed. "It means I can speak from experience: dishonesty has bad consequences. And don't you _dare_ argue differently, Sokka," she said before he could make a sarcastic interjection. "I put all of us in danger, and we ended up getting separated. I never should have touched that scroll."

Aang glanced from Katara to Sokka, who looked just mildly surprised. It wasn't the first time Katara had expressed regret for taking the waterbending scroll—she had done that when they rescued her from Zuko's ship. But this was the first time she'd expressed any regret or contempt for what had happened as a result—what had happened while she was on Zuko's ship.

"I don't think I told you guys," Katara said suddenly. "But when I fought Zuko at the North Pole, he told me that Zhao had hired the pirates—the same ones I stole the scroll from, and who he tried to make a deal with—to assassinate him. They blew up his ship, and almost killed Zuko too. That was even worse than what happened to us."

There was a short, somber silence after this revelation.

"Well, now, there's no one out to get us," Toph pointed out.

"Maybe no one's actively looking for us, but if anyone finds out who we are, we could get arrested, imprisoned, kidnapped …"

"Could you for once stop being such a sourpuss and just lighten up?" Toph complained.

That touched an nerve. "Oh, I'm sorry. You think I should be more like you, like some wild child?"

"Yeah, maybe. Maybe then, you'd see how great we have it. I mean look at us. We're traveling around the world, making easy money, having fun, with no parents to tell us what to do."

Katara looked at her. "Ah, I see," she said slowly, sensing a sore spot. "You're acting like this because of your parents. They were controlling over you, so you ran away, and now you act like your parents don't exist. You act like you hate them, but you don't. You just feel guilty."

"I _do_ hate them!" Toph said adamantly.

"I don't think so. I think you miss them. But you just don't want to deal with that, so instead, you act like this crazy person."

Toph stood up. "Look! I ran away to help Aang." That had been her main reason for leaving, in addition to wanting her freedom, she wanted to hold on to the one friendship that she had at the time.

"You know what? It doesn't matter. We have enough money, so you can stop putting us at risk with these scams."

"I'll stop when I want to stop, and not when you tell me!" Toph snapped, before stalking away. She plopped down on the ground and bend her signature earth tent around herself, effectively shutting out her friends.

Sokka stood up. "Speaking of money, I'm off to spend some. I mean, now that we have it, it'd be a waste _not_ to use it."

Katara huffed. "You're just as bad as she is." She turned and walked away in the direction opposite to the one Toph had gone in.

Sokka watched her leave, and then looked to Aang, who was still sitting where he'd remained during most of the conversation. "Aang, can you talk to Toph?"

"W-why me?"

Sokka shrugged. "You're the same age, and you seem to be closest to her. Just try to get her and Katara to quit arguing. Otherwise, they'll start to take it out on us." With that he left the camp, heading back in the direction of the town.

Aang spent a few minutes thinking over what to say to Toph. He thought about the things that Katara and Toph's argument had reminded him of, and the things that he and Toph hadn't gotten around to talking about yet.

Aang knocked his fist against the earthen wall, with just enough force for Toph to feel. "Can I come in? Or will you come out and talk to me?" He faltered for a moment; then, remembering the first time they were able to have a private conversation, he added softly, "I like it when we're able to talk."

After a moment, the earth walls came down. Toph remained where she was, sitting cross-legged on the ground. "Okay, you win. So talk."

Aang scratched his head. "Katara once told me it was okay to miss Appa. So I think she'd agree when I say … it's _okay_ to miss your parents." He sat down next to Toph. "I grew up with monks and nuns. They didn't have any sense of family units. We were just big communities. But, I still miss them."

His eyes flickered to Toph, but she remained stubbornly silent. Aang tried again, from a slightly different approach. "You know something we have in common? I ran away from home, too."

Toph frowned. She remembered Aang mentioning something about that, when she caught him leaving the captured ship. _This isn't the first time I've run away._

Aang sat down next to her. He took a deep breath before he started; Toph deduced this must be a painful subject for him, just as her parents were for her. "Our situations were actually kind of similar. Everyone had certain expectations for me, because I was—am—the Avatar. I wasn't supposed to know until I was sixteen. But I guess the Fire Nation was getting ready for war; and so the elders told me, because they said they needed me to be the Avatar.

"I was really close to one monk, Gyatso. He was my guardian, and my main teacher. We did lots of fun stuff together—like airbend fruit pies onto the other elders while they were meditating."

Toph let out an appreciative laugh.

"Anyway, the other monks were concerned that Gyatso wasn't having me focus enough on my training. I overheard them saying that we had to be separated, and that I'd be sent to the Eastern Air Temple to complete my training."

"Seriously? That _stinks._" Toph thought that was just like how her father had decided to put even stricter rules in place after finding out the truth about her Blind Bandit escapades.

"I was afraid and confused. … I didn't know what to do. That night, I took Appa and ran away."

Toph frowned in confusion. Wasn't his point that he _didn't_ want to leave the Southern Air Temple?

"I'm a nomad; I'm used to traveling, just not by myself. We ended up getting caught in a storm, out over the ocean. At some point we went under the waves …" He trailed off, struggling to remember exactly what had happened. "I think our being in danger triggered the Avatar State. The next thing I knew, I was waking up in Katara's arms."

Toph was a little bit startled, hearing that phrase. "Um … I'm afraid to ask …"

"Katara and Sokka found Appa and me, frozen in an iceberg. I had been in the Avatar State. I stayed there, not aging, not even aware of time passing." Aang took a deep breath. "That's why I was missing for the hundred years since the war started. Because I ran away."

Toph didn't like hearing Aang sound so self-incriminating. "But you came back," she pointed out. "And now you're doing everything you can to set things right."

"Yeah, I know. At least that's what I'm trying to do. But I _am_ responsible for the death of my people. And I'll never be able to apologize to Gyatso or the other Air Nomads for running away." He looked over at Toph now. "It's too late for me. But you still have a chance."

Toph didn't answer. She was deep in thought, her eyes fixed on nothing.

She remembered arguing with Aang in the Serpent's Pass, when he was avoiding the topic of losing Appa. _I thought I was being strong, but really I was just running away from my feelings._

Aang and Toph were both runaways. They had left their homes because they wanted to be themselves, not what others expected them to be. But while Aang had run away to escape his destiny, Toph ran away to find hers.

They were still running, even now.

* * *

><p>Toph didn't apologize for doing her scams, but afterwards she didn't ask the boys to accompany her in any more hoaxes. She kept her word, and stopped when she wanted to. Neither she nor Katara mentioned the subject again.<p>

When Sokka returned to the camp, he had a new purchase with him: a red-feathered messenger hawk. Though Katara was incredulous, Sokka was rather proud. "Now we can send messages all over the world, even to Gran-Gran."

Toph thought of someone she could write to, but she didn't mention it right away; if she mentioned it in front of Katara, the older girl would realize that she'd been right, and Toph wasn't about to admit that. Instead she waited until later in the day, and sought Aang out.

"Can you help me with something?"

Aang airbended himself to his feet. "Another swimming lesson?" he asked excitedly.

"No. I need you to write some things down for me. I want to send a letter to my parents."

Aang looked at her, and smiled. "Sure thing." He got some paper and a rough charcoal pencil from among Sokka's invasion plan materials.

"Okay, ready," he said, poised to write.

_Dear Mom and Dad,_

_My friend is writing this down for me as I tell him what I want to say. I know you must be surprised to get a letter from me, after all these months. Looking back, I wish I'd written sooner._

_I can't tell you everything that's going on with me, in case this letter is intercepted. I will say that I've had a lot of adventures—some good, some bad. My friends and I discovered a long-lost spirit library, crossed the dangerous Serpent's Pass, visited Ba Sing Se, and even met the Earth King. Not to mention we've gotten into plenty of scrapes with enemy soldiers and benders. I've gotten to be good friends with the kids I'm traveling with, and I've met lots of people along the way._

Toph paused, and Aang waited patiently until she started again. "_I had my doubts when we started, but my pupil has turned out to be a fantastic bender. I hope you'll be able to see him again someday, and that when you do, you'll all get along._"

Aang looked at her in surprise. "Do you mean that?"

"Pay attention, Twinkle Toes."

"Sorry." Aang turned back to taking down her words.

_I've also improved my own bending. When we traveled to Ba Sing Se, Xu Fin and Master Yu forged a letter from you, Mom, saying that you were in the city and wanted to see me. I wanted to see you, too, so I went to the address on the letter, but of course you weren't there. Xu Fin and Yu trapped me in a metal cage; but—I swear on the family name that I'm not making this up—I escaped by figuring out how to bend metal. I'm the only earthbender capable of doing that._

_There's something else I want you to know. I wasn't kidnapped—I ran away. I tried not to think about it, but now I realize it was selfish and I must have hurt you when I left. I'm sorry. I was frustrated and resentful, and I wanted to do more than stay shut up in a house for my whole life. I saw it as a now-or-never situation, since our visitors were leaving that night. I'm sorry I hurt you, but I'm not sorry joined them. I'm happy, and I'm doing important work. My friends and I have a plan, and if it works, I may be able to come home in a matter of months._

_I probably won't be able to write to you again—we're using a messenger hawk, and they're kind of hard to come by. I just wanted to let you know that I'm all right._

_I love you._

_Sincerely, Toph_

To add some authenticity, Toph squished some mud between her fingers and pressed her thumb against the paper, leaving a print next to her name. Then Aang rolled up the letter and put it in the container strapped to Hawky's back. The messenger bird let each of the preteens pet him, and then Aang released him into the sky.

As he watched the bird fly away in the direction of the Earth Kingdom, Aang voiced a question. "Did you mean that, about going home after the war?"

Toph shrugged. "I don't know … maybe, at some point. By then they'll probably have noticed that they can't control what I do. It's up to me how long I stay with them."

"Would you stay with them—for good?"

"I seriously doubt it," Toph said frankly. "I've seen too much, done too much. Besides, I don't want to leave you guys for a while yet."

Aang felt a little more relieved by that. He knew it might be a little selfish, but he didn't want Toph to leave.

_If it were up to me, I'd want you with me._

* * *

><p>At the next place where they made camp, in the woods near a different town, they had a surprise visitor, who introduced herself as Hama. Sokka was wary of the way she showed up at their campsite, but the old woman offered them food and a place at her inn, which would be safer than camping out in the eerie woods. He wasn't going to argue against an offer like that.<p>

Still, he stayed suspicious of Hama, to the point that he tried searching her house. When they were caught, Hama calmly told them the truth: she was from the Southern Water Tribe, just like Sokka and Katara. Not only that, she was the only remaining waterbender of the generation before them. Katara was understandably thrilled to meet another waterbender from her own tribe, and even more eager when Hama offered to teach her what she knew.

It was like a glimpse into a life that had been stolen from them: if the Fire Nation hadn't captured Hama and the other waterbenders, Katara might have grown up under her tutelage.

With the mystery of Hama apparently solved, Sokka turned his attention to the mystery of the disappearing townsfolk. Toph and Aang joined him in searching for clues; it was part of Aang's responsibility, anyway, to investigate any problems that could involve spirits. At first he thought it could be due to a problem with the environment, like how the Fire Nation had burned down the forest where Hei Bei lived; but this island was lush and healthy in vegetation, and had beautiful mountains and valleys as well.

At one point they passed a field that Hama and Katara had visited earlier, as they deduced from the ring of plants black from losing their water. Aang spoke up. "Hey Toph, look at this."

"Well, I wish I could," Toph mused.

"Sorry—here, feel. And smell, too." He held it out, and she felt it: something like a thin layer of rubbery material.

"It's … some kind of flower."

"It's a fire lily," Aang clarified. "They only grow in the Fire Nation. I used to see them when I came to Fire Nation, before the war started."

"Nice." Toph tried to hand it back to him.

"You can keep it."

"Why? I can't—" Then she shut her mouth. If he was trying to be nice, she ought to shut up and accept it. But Aang had already realized his mistake: she couldn't really appreciate the flower, since she couldn't see it.

"You had gardens at your house," Aang remembered.

"Yeah, but there were always excuses for why I shouldn't go out there. When I did, it was usually to practice earthbending. I never really got the flowers." She might once have been curious about them, but her parents had told her not to touch them. Flowers were something you were supposed to see and smell, not feel. If you touched them, examined them too much, you could ruin them.

Aang wondered if love worked the same way, left better off at a distance than at direct contact.

Toph was fun; he could be natural and fool around, not just in front of her, but with her. She was rough-and-tough, and usually hid her emotions; but underneath that brusque, sassy attitude, she was sensitive and empathetic and sometimes kind of sweet. She could get defensive when she was angry, but she didn't hold grudges. She was realistic, spunky, independent, and fun.

And Aang knew she was liable to sock him if he made a real advance toward her. (The flower thing didn't count, since she hadn't caught on right away.)

He could imagine the insults and nicknames she'd throw at him—lovesick, lover boy, softie. She might never take him seriously again. And he needed her to take him seriously, if they were to continue working together as teammates.

* * *

><p>Katara trusted Hama, enough to believe her reassurance that they would be all right if they went into the woods under the full moon, despite the rash of disappearances in those circumstances.<p>

The old woman seemed almost otherworldly, standing under the moon's glow. "Can you feel the power the full moon brings?" She inhaled deeply, and flexed her arms. "For generations, it has blessed waterbenders with its glow, allowing us to do incredible things. I've never felt more alive."

Katara felt it, to, though she usually didn't exalt in it in such a way.

"What I'm about to show you, I discovered in that wretched Fire Nation prison. The guards were always careful to keep any water away from us. They piped in dry air, and had us suspended away from the ground. Before giving us any water, they would bind our hands and feet so we couldn't bend. Any sign of trouble was met with cruel retribution."

As Hama spoke, Katara remembered Zuko and Zhao mentioning prisons specially designed for waterbenders. She might have gone to such a place, if Zuko and Iroh hadn't defended her. If only it were as easy for her to feel gratitude toward the prince as it had been then …

Hama went on. "And yet, each month, I felt the full moon enriching me with its energy. There had to be something I could do to escape. Then I realized that where there is life, there is water." Katara knew that to be true; there was water in all living things; the fact that it was essential was what made it so sacred. But as Hama explained, she felt a chill hearing the context. "The rats that scurried across the floor of my cage were nothing more than skins filled with liquid. And I passed years developing the skills that would lead to my escape. _Bloodbending_. Controlling the water in another body. Enforcing your will over theirs."

Katara was horrified, and rightly so.

"Once I had mastered the rats, I was ready for the men; and during the next full moon, I walked free for the first time in decades—my cell unlocked by the very guards assigned to keep me in.

"Once you perfect this technique, you can control anything … or anyone."

Katara's voice was quiet and uneasy. "But—to reach inside someone and control them? I don't know if I want that kind of power." That was an understatement; she knew that she didn't want it. Though, on the other hand, it might have come in handy if she'd had that power in the past—like during the battle at the Spirit Oasis. There had even been a full moon that night; could she have stopped Zhao if she'd known of this ability?

"The choice is not yours," Hama stated. "The power exists … and it's your duty to use the gifts you've been given to win this war. Katara, they tried to wipe us out, our entire culture—your mother!"

"I know," Katara said somberly.

"Then you should understand what I'm talking about. We're the last waterbenders of the Southern Tribe. We have to fight these people whenever we can, wherever they are, with any means necessary!"

_Wherever they are_.

Suddenly it clicked in Katara's mind. The Fire Nation villagers had been disappearing during the full moon, when Hama was at the height of her power.

"It's you," Katara realized. "You're the one who's making people disappear during the full moons." Why hadn't she seen it sooner? But she knew why: she hadn't thought to suspect the kind yet mysterious innkeeper, even when she suggested training on this dangerous night.

"They threw me in prison to rot, along with my brothers and sisters. They deserve the same."

"How can you say that?" Katara demanded. "You're punishing civilians, not soldiers! How can you live among these people and not realize that they're innocent? Most of them have nothing to do with the war. And they can't control what the Fire Lord does. His government and military are to blame, not his people!"

"You don't know what you're saying. You've never been punished simply for being who you are. I thought you understood the way things are, Katara."

"I do understand," Katara stated defiantly. "I understand that war is more complicated than two sides fighting each other." She didn't elaborate because she knew it would sound idealistic: that there were good people who did bad things, and bad people who did good things. She had seen examples of this, in Shyu, Iroh, General Fong, Long Feng, and now in Hama. She had even seen it in Zuko, though she no longer knew what category she would put him in.

"You must carry on my work."

"I won't!" Katara was shouting now. "I won't use bloodbending, and I won't allow you to keep terrorizing this town!"

She shouldn't have said the last part. Suddenly, the technique that had a moment ago been part of a story, a mere possibility, became a physical reality: she felt her arm forced back; then her whole body seized up; then she was forced to her knees.

Katara briefly wondered if this was this how Zuko had felt, when he was forced to fight against his father.

But there was one difference between them: Katara wasn't so loyal to Hama that she refused to fight against her. She did come close to begging for mercy, but she had the willpower and found the strength to fight back.

"You aren't the only one who draws power from the moon. My bending is _more_ powerful than yours, Hama. Your technique is useless on me!"

She bent water out of the grass, just as Hama had shown her earlier that day. They battled each other, a teacher against a student—not like Piandao and Sokka, but like Jeong Jeong and Zhao—the student using what he learned from the teacher, against the same teacher.

For a moment Katara believed she could win, without Hama getting what she wanted.

But then Sokka and Aang showed up, intending to help Katara, after learning the truth about the half-mad innkeeper. They didn't have the strength and power that Katara drew from the moon; they couldn't withstand Hama's bloodbending.

"Don't hurt your friends, Katara. And don't let them hurt each other!"

They were all surprised when the two boys stopped short, and Hama stopped moving of her own will. Even Katara was shocked at herself, as she felt her control over Hama's blood; but then she lowered her arms, accepting the power, and bringing the old woman onto her knees.

She realized, then, that she would do anything to save her friends. Even if it meant going against her morals, or hurting someone she'd once felt a bond with.

Toph showed up with the villagers, including those whom Hama had imprisoned over the past months, possibly even years. They put the old woman in chains again, and surprisingly, she didn't try to fight.

"My work is done." Hama cast a cruel smile over her shoulder. "Congratulations, Katara. You're a bloodbender." She laughed as they took her away, leaving the four teenagers in the forest.

Aang and Sokka looked to Katara in concern. Katara pressed her hand over her mouth, fighting the sick feeling in her stomach. Then she fell onto her knees and cried. Sokka knelt down next to her and hugged her, while Aang lay a hand on her shoulder, silently offering comfort.

Toph forced herself to wait a few minutes before speaking softly. "Aang? What happened?"

They didn't ask Katara that question; they deduced the truth from what the villagers had described, what Sokka and Aang had experienced, and what all of them had heard Hama say as she was led away.

Toph was unsurprised by the explanation for Hama's method of kidnapping the people she had found; but she was reasonably concerned when she heard that Hama had used the technique on Aang, Sokka, and Katara, who then used it to subdue her.

"I should have gotten there sooner," Toph murmured.

"No, Toph; I'm glad you weren't there to feel it." He closed his hand over hers; Toph didn't know whether it was a gesture of protection, or of mutual support. She didn't comment on it.

"Katara? It's okay," Sokka shushed.

All she said in response was, "I want to go." She wished she could say, _I want to go home_. But home was thousands of miles away. As Hama said, the war had torn apart their home.

But Sokka nodded and helped her stand. "We should leave." He didn't know what the townsfolk would do if they found out that Katara was a waterbender and, now, a bloodbender.

Katara took a final glance at the clearing where they had fought. The grass and a few trees were withered and black after having been drained of water. "I'll never bloodbend again," she vowed.

The phrase pulled at something in Aang's memory. _I'll never firebend again_. Katara had argued that he would have to, eventually. Guru Pathik had said that firebending was a part of himself that he had to accept. And now Katara had discovered a new form of bending that she was capable of performing, but was loathe to use.

It was the difference between having an ability, and choosing the way in which you used it. Wasn't the latter the thing that mattered?

For Katara's sake, he hoped that she would never have to use it again.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I was planning to leave out the events of "The Puppetmaster" because nothing about them was different. But then, I saw a YouTube video that SelinaTT made to the song "Just a Little Girl" by Trading Yesterday. It made a parallel of Zuko's Agni Kai with Ozai to Katara's water duel with Hama. Plus, it's such an important event for Katara's character, it seemed wrong not to include it.


	39. Truth and Freedom

_Published June 27, 2013_

"Truth and Freedom"

* * *

><p>What a great thing, to be loved! What a greater thing still, to love! The heart becomes heroic through passion. It is no longer composed of anything but what is pure; it no longer rests on anything but what is elevated and great. An unworthy thought can no more spring up in it than a nettle on a glacier. The lofty and serene soul, inaccessible to common passions and common emotions, rising above the clouds and shadows of this world, its follies, its falsehoods, its hatreds, its vanities, its miseries, inhabits the blue of the skies, and no longer feels anything but the deep subterranean commotions of destiny, as the summit of the mountains feels the quaking of the earth.<p>

If no one loved, the sun would go out.

~ Victor Hugo, _Les Misérables_

* * *

><p><em>"Are you ready, Aang?" The question came from Toph, his newest and closest teacher.<em>

_"Almost," Aang said truthfully. "There's just one more thing I want to do." He stood up and turned to face the small girl. __"Toph, before I go, I want to give you something to remember me by—since it might be my last chance." He cupped his hands around her face, tilting it upward, and brought his lips to hers._

_ He didn't know how it felt, because before he could feel anything, Toph pushed him away, looking horrified. "How could you do that?" she cried. Insulted and angry, she stomped her foot, and a fissure opened in the ground, and Aang was falling, and he couldn't airbend or earthbend to save his life._

_ "Toph, no! I'm sorry! Come back!"_

_ "I can't! I'm floating away!" She was being carried off by the air, and he was falling deeper into the earth; they were going where the other belonged, and they couldn't help each other …_

"Toph, no!"

"Relax, Twinkle Toes."

"I didn't mean it!"

"Aang, _snap out of it!_"

Aang's eyes popped open, bloodshot and shocked. Toph was standing before him, her bare feet firm on the ground, her hair disheveled and hanging out of its usual bun. The earth they stood on was perfectly intact.

He'd had another nightmare.

Aang put a hand over his heart as he caught his breath. Toph could feel his racing pulse vibrating through the earth. "Are you all right?" she asked, concerned.

"Yeah, now." Aang bowed his head. "I'm sorry I woke you up."

"S'okay," Toph said, in a tone that said it _wasn't_ okay, but she was willing to let it go.

Aang glanced around the campsite. Katara was still asleep, but Sokka was awake and getting to his feet. "Y'know, I'm just gonna go over the maps … Aang, try to sleep. You too, Toph."

Aang curled up on Appa's tail, feeling guilty about putting his friends through the anxiety of watching _his_ anxiety escalate. He'd had nightmares in the past, especially since he came out of the iceberg. In recent months, he'd had dreams about Gyatso, and the storm when he ran away, and the times he'd gone into the Avatar State.

Now, when the group was spending the final days before the eclipse on the island where they would meet the invasion force, he was having nightmares of a different kind: instead of reminding him of horrors in his past, his dreams reflected his fear of what was to come.

He arrived at the Fire Lord's palace completely unprepared and incompetent. He saw his friends face various forms of death. In one dream, he found that Toph had no eyes; then she sank into the earth. Katara had been engulfed by fire, Zuko's element.

Aang had found himself underwater, trapped under a layer of ice. He was going to drown—a terrible way for an airbender to die, cut off from his life-giving element. He looked up and saw Zuko standing above him; Zuko could see him, but made no movement to help him.

He felt rather than saw Toph sit down next to him. "Look," she began, sounding a little uncertain but plunging ahead anyway. "I know you're an airbender, so sometimes you can have your head in the clouds—literally. But staying awake is making you go crazy—I mean, you're rivaling the time Sokka tried cactus juice! If you're going to be able to focus during the invasion, you _have _to catch up on sleep."

She was trying her best to offer advice, but it did little to comfort Aang. "I'm trying, Toph. But I'm so on edge about the invasion, it's all I can think about, even in my subconscious. I know I'll need sleep to be awake for the Invasion, but the nightmares just make me more sacred about what's going to happen."

"What is it that you're so worried about? You'll have the easiest job, taking out the Fire Lord when he doesn't even have his firebending. The rest of us will be fighting our way into the Capital."

Maybe that was part of the problem: Aang's task sounded _too_ easy, when it was put so simply. He felt certain that there would be something, perhaps some unknown factor, that would catch him off guard. But there was something else, something he'd been worried about for months, though he'd pushed it to the back of his mind ever since they left Ba Sing Se.

"There's something I didn't tell you," Aang said softly. He sat up to face her properly. "I haven't told Katara or Sokka, either … though I mentioned it to Iroh, and he thought I did the right thing …"

"What did you do?" Toph asked, sounding suspicious in a motherly way that might have rivaled Katara.

"When I went to see Guru Pathik, I didn't quite finish the training … I didn't master the Avatar State."

"But I thought you were able to go into it when we went to rescue Katara?"

"That's the thing. The last step of opening my chakras was to focus on the cosmos, and let go of my earthly attachments. Do you know what that means?" Toph shook her head, shrugging ignorantly. "It means letting go of the people I love."

Aang stopped, letting Toph absorb that. She was silent; her only reaction was a surprised and pensive expression.

"What are you getting at?" she asked finally.

"I didn't want to do it. I … I love you guys too much. I wouldn't be able to get along without you supporting me. I can't stop feeling attached to you." It was dark, but he could almost see the blush on Toph's cheeks. "I tried it—I was almost at that detached state—but then, I had that vision of Katara imprisoned in Ba Sing Se. I chose to go help her—I chose my attachments—instead of staying and mastering the Avatar State."

"Wait. You mean you lied to me? And then you tried to use the Avatar State anyway?" Toph was trying to remember when she saw him that day. He'd told her that while they were on Appa; that must be why she hadn't detected his heartbeat—she hadn't been in contact with the earth.

"I actually did it, Toph. I was in the Avatar State. But when Azula shot me, my seventh chakra was blocked, cutting off my connection to the cosmic energy in the universe."

Toph blinked uncomprehendingly. "You know what I just heard? 'Blah blah, spiritual mumbo-jumbo, blah blah, something about space.'"

Aang was frustrated by her carelessness. "It means I can't go into the Avatar State at all! So I can't count on it to save me if I'm in danger tomorrow; I'll be on my own. And I won't be able to step in if you or anyone else needs help."

Toph was silent for a long moment. She didn't know whether to be hurt or angry about his lie; the fact that it had happened a while ago dulled her emotion regarding it. But she could see some validity in this final cause for worry. Some.

"You should give us some more credit, you know."

It was Aang's turn to be confused. "Huh?"

"We're forming an army of capable waterbenders, earthbenders, and Water Tribe warriors, not to mention the Greatest Earthbender in the World. You should have some more faith in us. And in yourself."

"I do," Aang insisted. "It's just—this is going to be the hardest thing any of us have done, and for me—"

"I didn't agree to help you just so you could freak out when you were finally about to reach your goal. And I don't think Yue and Roku would have helped save you if you weren't somehow destined to save us."

He sighed at this. "I know my destiny means that I have to try. That doesn't guarantee I'll succeed."

"Aang, every single person who's signed up for the mission, or helped us along the way, believes that you can defeat the Fire Lord. And no one knows it better than us." She gestured around the camp, indicating herself, Katara, and Sokka. "The day we started training, you couldn't move a pebble. Now, you're almost as good at earthbending as I am! And Katara can vouch for your progress in waterbending. You've won more battles than either of us can count." She punched him gently in the arm. "You're the man, Twinkle Toes."

The nickname, as well as the onslaught of praise, brought an involuntary smile to Aang's face. "Thanks, Toph."

"You're welcome. Now get some sleep!"

Aang lay down again, getting comfortable on Appa's fur. He saw Toph get up and step back onto the ground. "Toph?"

"What?"

"Will you stay with me?"

She turned around to face him, frowning. "You mean during the invasion? Or afterwards?"

"I—I meant now." Now Aang was the one starting to blush. "I mean—you don't have to sleep _with_ me, but—if I have nightmares again …"

Toph considered, then sat down right in front of Appa's tail. She bent her usual earth tent on either side, but lay down so that her head rested on Appa's tail. She folded her arms under her chin, smiling at him.

"Thank you. G'night, Toph."

"Good night." _Yes, I'll stay with you. As long as I can._

A short distance away, Sokka walked out to the cliffs above the ocean. He could see the moon just starting to rise. It was waning after reaching its full size about a week before.

He sat down on the cliff, his feet hanging down over the edge. For a few minutes he just sat there, watching the moon.

"Hey, Yue," Sokka said softly. "You're the moon, so, you're the one who's causing the eclipse. So, thanks, I guess, for giving us this opportunity. Good luck … and wish us luck, too."

* * *

><p>Despite the fact that it was the day before the eclipse, life in the Capital went on as usual. Zuko could afford to spend it lazily, but he felt restless, though he was starting to appreciate some of the luxury of the palace. But in spite of the presence of servants, he was lonely. He thought about visiting Mai or even Ty Lee, but it would be awkward with the first and strange with the second.<p>

He couldn't help wondering about tomorrow's invasion. He no longer doubted that the Avatar was alive, and if that was the case, then he was bound to be a part of the invasion. And that meant his little gang of followers, and probably other friends of theirs, were likely to come too. Zuko prayed that he wouldn't be forced to cross paths with any of them, least of all Katara … but he knew he wouldn't have to. Unlike Azula, he had neither asked nor been invited to take part in any kind of defense. Azula wouldn't even be going into battle; she would just help guard their hiding place outside of the city proper. Zuko wouldn't have to do anything except pass the time.

Then, in the evening, the strangest thing happened. A messenger came and informed him that he was wanted in the Fire Lord's war chamber. There was a meeting taking place—one that he hadn't even known about—and his presence was not only allowed, but required.

Zuko was surprised, but when he thought about it as he put on his formal robes and armor, he realized that it was exactly what he'd wanted. This proved that he had been accepted back. Ozai now valued him, and even his experiences while exiled in the Earth Kingdom, enough to ask for his opinion.

Zuko found himself in the same position he'd been in three years ago, hearing a plan that was unnecessarily cruel. This time, though, he stayed silent, knowing better than to speak when Ozai hadn't invited him to do so.

Zuko thought that his was how it might have been if he hadn't spoken out of turn last time.

_But now you know it's wrong_.

His opinion was the same, only it was no longer that of a naïve boy anymore. He had seen for himself the consequences of his father's wanton decisions in the war. It had ripped apart families … including Lee's, and Song's … but Katara had been the first person he met who represented what the war was doing to people.

_"If I had been in that war chamber, I would have done the exact same thing."_

She had made it seem like speaking out was the natural thing, the right thing, to do. Her way of thinking was, What kind of person _wouldn't_ have protested?

Someone who went along with the norm, wanted to ensure their own safety, and didn't care about who would get hurt.

But Zuko cared. He wanted to blame Katara for that, for convincing him that it was all right to care about others; but he had a feeling that it was actually a part of his own personality, that he was capable of compassion and empathy.

As he returned to his room, Zuko felt something like disgust, or perhaps regret. It felt wrong, to do nothing in a situation like the one he'd just been in. But what else could he have done? If he'd protested, he would have faced excruciating consequences, just as he had the last time.

He wasn't free to do what he truly wanted to do—what he felt was right.

Zuko finally realized and admitted something to himself: his father was wrong to want to continue the war, and to go about it in such a heinous way. Usually Zuko stopped himself from thinking anything negative about his father. He had thought that the old general at the meeting three years ago had been wrong; he and officers like Zhao were wrong to be so cruel in this war; but Fire Lord Ozai was at the heart of the matter, and he, too, did wrong. They didn't just do whatever was in the best interest of the Fire Nation: they wanted power and glory, and they went to extreme lengths to get it. The result was broken lives and broken families.

As Ozai had said, he'd been among the Earth Kingdom commoners. He knew that they didn't deserve to lose their families, their homes, their lives. Now he saw that it wasn't simply a matter of unavoidable casualties; the plans they had discussed were of annihilation. Their only purpose was to assert Ozai's power over the world.

As Zuko sat down at his desk, his eyes fell on the hairpiece that Iroh had smuggled to him, that had belonged to Avatar Roku. He thought of the story of Roku and Sozin, and how the war had started. He remembered Iroh's quiet insistence that his legacy, the great-grandson of both the Avatar and the Fire Lord, gave him the power to bring back balance. Iroh seemed to have known, all along, that some strange and important destiny was in store for him.

_"Sooner or later, you will have to make a choice_._"_

Zuko had tried to make that final choice in Ba Sing Se. He had meant for his actions of that day to seal his fate. But all it had done was keep him in uncertainty, treading dangerously close to regret.

Was it too late for him to undo that choice, or to make a new decision that would cancel it out?

He had acted on his long-term desires in Ba Sing Se. Now, he was going thinking beyond himself.

Zuko sat up for a long time that night, thinking, even trying to meditate. But instead of focusing, his thoughts wandered of their own accord, and Zuko let them. He remembered rescuing the Avatar in disguise, sharing meals with people who should have been his enemies, turning against the people who had been kind to him. He thought about all the choices he'd made, all the lessons he'd learned, all the advice he'd received.

_"You are not the man you used to be, Zuko. You are stronger and wiser and freer than you have ever been. And now you have come to the crossroads of your destiny. It's time for you to choose. It's time for you to choose good."_

Now Zuko understood. Iroh had not forced him to side with the Avatar; he had wanted Zuko to realize that he had free will. He had wanted Zuko to _choose_ good. That was what freedom was: the ability to desire and choose goodness. It meant recognizing the truth and choosing to live in it.

_"It's time to start asking yourself the important questions. Who are you? What do __you__ want?"_

That was also freedom: knowing who you are and how you are called to live. Zuko's mother Ursa had known this too. _"No matter how things seem to change, never forget who you are."_

He had forgotten for a long time. He had been a slave to his idea of honor, a slave to his father's expectations. There was no honor in waging this war, and he now realized that he didn't want to live up to his father's expectations, if that meant being as cruel as him.

As a fugitive he had seen how the war had destroyed the Earth Kingdom. Since he returned to the Fire Nation, he had seen the falseness of the Fire Nation court, and his father's capacity for evil. He had seen through the lies that he had been fed all his life. He had learned the truth, and that truth could set him free … if he was willing to let it.

If he was going to do anything significant, now was the time to do it. The eclipse would provide him an opportunity to act … he could even tell his father the truth that he'd realized, without the risk of being burned. Even after the eclipse ended, the Fire Nation soldiers would be too focused on fighting the invaders to stop him from doing anything. He could slip away, and then …

The answer was there, in his mind, only he had to talk himself into it. The Avatar was the one person most determined to stop his father's atrocities. That meant if he truly wanted to help, he would have to join the Avatar—permanently, this time.

Really, the idea had been fermenting in the back of his mind, ever since Iroh had told him of his connection to Avatar Roku. No, it went back even farther. It had crossed his mind multiple times. He had even discussed it with Katara, during their imprisonment in Ba Sing Se.

_"You can't just forget about all of this. You can't hide from the war. You have to decide which side you're on."_

_ "So if I'm not with you, I'm against you?"_

_ "Iroh said we both have to learn to choose our battles. I chose my fight a long time ago. Now it's your turn."_

_ "Would you be willing to fight with me? Would your friends? Would you all trust me?"_

And before that … he remembered Katara almost daring to ask him, after she healed a lightning-stuck Iroh. _"I don't suppose there's any way we could …"_

Zuko shook his head. She might have been referring to the two of them having a relationship. That's not what this was about—not choosing who he loved. This was about choosing who to stand beside.

He'd stood besides, fought alongside, the Avatar and his friends, multiple times.

If he could find them … he could do it again.

* * *

><p>Katara was the second person to get up, after her brother. After donning Water Tribe clothes for the first time in months, she made herself useful by preparing tea. Iroh would have approved, she thought with a smile.<p>

She might see him again, today. She wasn't just hoping; she was planning to see him. Once the Invasion was well under way—once the waterbenders were less essential to their progress—she would make her way to the prison where Piandao had guessed Iroh was being kept. She knew from Sokka's maps that it was nestled in the northwest side of the volcano crater that housed the capital city, Caldera.

The invasion force arrived disguised by a fog that the swamp waterbenders conjured. This time there was no trepidation when Katara ran up to greet her father. Toph was introduced to all the friends Aang had met before she joined the group: Tyro and Haru, the father and son who were leading the earthbenders; the Mechanist who had made most of their equipment, and his handicapped son Teo; and waterbenders who were native to the swamp where Aang had first seen a vision of Toph. She recognized the footsteps of Pipsqueak and The Duke, and was startled but ultimately pleased to see her old Earth Rumble opponents, the Hippo and the Boulder.

While Katara made introductions, Hakoda pulled Sokka aside for a moment. "Sokka, there was one group we couldn't find. Your warrior friends in the Earth Kingdom."

"The Kyoshi Warriors?" Sokka looked disappointed. He had known they might not be able to come, but a part of him had secretly hoped that they would be involved with this effort. He would have liked to fight alongside Suki in such a decisive battle.

"I'm sorry, son."

"That's okay. Last I heard, they were doing other work to help in the war. Besides, we still have a decent-sized battalion." He turned and gestured to all the people assembled on the beach.

"Are you ready to tell them the details of your plan?" Hakoda asked. He could immediately sense Sokka's nervousness.

"W-why me? You're the chief, the one leading this thing …"

"It was your idea. I want to credit you for that."

Sokka gulped, and found he'd lost his appetite for the morning meal that the soldiers were distributing.

"Don't worry," Hakoda said. "You'll do great."

Sokka took a deep breath and walked up before the troops—only to trip on the platform they had raised. It got worse from then on: he rambled, mixed up his maps, and completely confused the crowd. Then he thought to explain how he'd gotten the idea for the eclipse, and how they'd met each of the people assembled here, but in his mind, he couldn't do that without starting at the very beginning, including how he and Katara had found the Avatar.

Toph whispered to Aang, "Did Suki really kiss Sokka back then?"

"I didn't know about it," Aang said with a shrug. He felt his cheeks burn a little, remembering one of the dreams he'd had the other night.

Hakoda intervened, offering to take over for Sokka. The youngest Water Tribe warrior walked back dejectedly to sit with his teammates. Katara put a comforting hand on his arm, before they turned their attention to Hakoda's explanation of the attack.

"When this is finished, the Avatar will have defeated the Fire Lord. We will have control of the Fire Nation capital, and this war will be over!"

Everyone cheered at this. Hakoda knew how to be inspirational as well as efficient.

The next half-hour was spent making final preparations. Katara armed herself with four waterskins to keep her element close. Toph acquired new armor, like the rest of the earthbenders wore. And Aang finally shaved off the hair he'd grown in the Fire Nation, revealing the arrow line on his head. With his tattoos visible, he would be completely recognizable as the Avatar, the last airbender.

When they called the roll, assigning each person to a certain boat, they realized Sokka was missing. Aang flew back to the cliff and found him half-dressed in his Water Tribe armor. He was still upset about messing up. Aang could almost see his logic: if he couldn't even deliver a speech, how well would he fare in real combat?

Aang tried to sound reasonable and encouraging, the way Toph sometimes did. "Look, your moment of truth isn't going to be in front of some map. It's going to be out there, on the battlefield."

"You seem so confident about everything," Sokka said. They had almost switched places, considering how things had been during the past few days. "How do you know we're going to win?"

"Because I already failed the world once at Ba Sing Se. I'm not going to let myself fail again," Aang vowed.

Sokka looked at Aang, really looked at him now. After shaving his head and receiving a new glider from the Mechanist, Aang looked like the airbender Sokka had come to know, yet not quite the same one he and Katara had found in the iceberg. They'd had more successes and failures than they could count, and there had been times when the pressure seemed like too much for Aang; but he still found the courage to keep trying.

_I'm not going to let myself fail again_.

* * *

><p>The submarines broke off from their boat counterparts to travel safely under the Gates of Azulon. They had to come up for air a while later; that would be the last time anyone could reconvene before the real battle started.<p>

Aang had made his decision. He had thought about what to say and how to say it.

He would thank his friends for everything they had done. Then he would try to talk to Toph alone. Then, he would kiss her—just briefly—before he left the group to fly ahead and face the Fire Lord.

He flew over to stand on the submarine that his three friends had ridden in. Sokka and Katara both brightened up at seeing him. But Toph appeared downcast, her skin sweaty and more pale than usual.

"Are you okay?" Aang asked.

"I think I was undersea-sick," Toph said dully. Aang noticed The Duke go over to the edge of the submarine and wash his helmet in the water.

Aang bit his lip, not to keep from being nauseous, but to keep his expression composed. Inside he felt like cursing.

"So … are you ready for the Fire Nation to know the Avatar's alive?" Sokka asked him.

"I'm ready," Aang said truthfully.

"You'll do great, Aang," Katara told him.

"I don't know what to say," Aang said, looking at his three friends and teammates. "I don't know where to start. I owe you so much."

"Considering everything you've done for us," Toph said, "I think we're about even."

"Everything you guys taught me … it's all been building up to this. If I succeed, it'll be because of you."

Katara stepped forward and put her hands on Aang's shoulders. "If this war ends, it'll be because of you." She bent down to give him a kiss on the cheek. Toph and Sokka came over to join the group hug.

"Everyone listen up." The four friends broke apart to hear Hakoda's instructions. "The next time we resurface, it'll be on the beaches. So stay alert and fight smart. Now break time's over. Back in the subs."

Sokka started walking back. Katara followed him, though she looked over her shoulder to smile encouragingly at Aang. He thought he saw her nod in Toph's direction, but he might have imagined it.

The blind earthbender was still standing next to him. She took a deep breath. "Listen. I know we haven't always been the best of friends."

Aang blinked at her. "What are you talking about?"

"I've seen the way you and Katara interact. You guys are really close, and I respect that. But I want you to know … you were my first real friend. And you still are my best friend. You helped me go places and do things I never imagined. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is … thank you."

She felt Aang put his hand on her shoulder, and then she felt something warm and light press against her cheek. Her eyes widened, but before she could react, Aang pulled away and explained softly, "In case I don't come back."

Toph's expression was one of wonder and sadness. Aang hugged her with one arm; then he stepped back, snapped his new glider open, and launched himself into the air. Toph held up her arm, hoping he could see her wave farewell.

* * *

><p>The naval stage of the invasion was completed as smoothly as possible; in other words, it was rough, but they got through it. It was during the land stage that they faced their first major obstacle. Sokka realized they would have to cut off the battlements that caused fire and other projectiles to rain down on the invaders. He convinced Katara and Hakoda to come with him on Appa to take out the battlements. It was strange, yet somehow pleasing, how they worked together. All Hakoda said was, "Watch each other's backs." He wasn't afraid to send them into danger anymore.<p>

Working as a team, the two siblings were able to destroy the weapons and leave the guards frozen to the walls inside. Hakoda fared less well; in taking out the guards, he received a wound in his right side.

"You're hurt—badly," was Katara's prognosis as she started to heal him. "You can't fight anymore."

"Everyone's counting on me to lead this mission, Katara," Hakoda said, wincing as he tried again to sit up. "I won't let them down."

For a moment Sokka wasn't sure who Hakoda sounded more like: Aang, or himself. He remembered what Aang had said, about his real moment of truth. Maybe this was it.

"I'll do it. I'll lead the invasion force."

"Don't be crazy," Katara said.

"Maybe I am a little crazy," Sokka admitted, "but the eclipse is about to start, and we need to be up that volcano by the time it does."

"You can do it." Hakoda looked at him from where he lay on the ground. "I'm proud of you, son."

"I still think you're crazy—but I'm proud of you, too," Katara said, turning to smile at her brother. That meant a lot to Sokka, considering she'd once claimed she was embarrassed to be related to him. They had come a long way together.

While Sokka took Appa back into the battle, Katara spent a few more minutes healing Hakoda's side. "I think that's the best I can do for now," she said finally, returning the water to her canteen. "How do you feel?"

"Tired, but it doesn't hurt that much—it's just sore." Katara saw him glance back at the plaza; then he managed to push himself upright. "If I can't fight, I still might be able to help somehow."

"Do you think you can walk?" She stood up and helped him slowly get to his feet. Katara put his arm over her, trying to support his weight. She was stronger than either of them expected.

"You've grown," Hakoda observed.

"Really? In just two months?"

Hakoda nodded. "I'm proud of you, too. You know that, don't you?"

"Yeah. I know."

They made their way slowly and steadily. The plaza gate was now guarded by Water Tribesmen rather than firebenders. The tanks and troops were at something of a standstill at the moment. Sokka was conferring with Bato when he caught sight of his family. Toph followed him over to the chief. "Dad! You're on your feet again."

"Thanks to your sister." He sat down on a rock, still holding his side. "I'm in no shape to fight, but maybe there is some way I could help."

"Everything's going smoothly," Sokka reported efficiently, "and the eclipse hasn't even kicked in yet."

Katara glanced up at the sky to check the sun. The moon was just starting to overlap it. Then, she saw some thing else in the sky. It looked … like Aang's glider? Hakoda noticed her distraction. "Is something wrong?"

"Yes," Katara said, her alarm growing as the figure came closer and became more distinct. "Is that—is that Aang?"

"What?" Toph and Sokka said at the same time.

"Is he all right?" Toph demanded.

"He's fine—flying this way."

A moment later he landed on the ground in front of them. "Please tell me you're here because the Fire Lord turned out to be a big wimp and you didn't even need the eclipse to take him down," Sokka said, more pleading than sarcastic.

"He wasn't home," Aang said tonelessly. "No one was. The entire palace city is abandoned."

Someone gasped; then Sokka said what they were all realizing. "They knew."

Why hadn't they thought of it, back in Ba Sing Se? No one had ever asked the Earth King if he'd mentioned the eclipse idea to the Kyoshi Warrior imposters. … Or maybe they had simply suspected it because they knew an eclipse was approaching, and the Fire Nation had fared badly during past eclipses?

"It's over," Aang said. "The Fire Lord is probably long gone. Far away on some remote island where he'll be safe during the eclipse."

Sokka frowned, looking thoughtful in a calculating way. "No. My instincts tell me he wouldn't go too far. He would have a secret bunker—somewhere he could go so it'll be safe during a siege, but still be close enough to lead his nation."

Toph spoke up. "If it's an underground secret bunker we're looking for, I'm just the girl to find it," she volunteered cheerfully.

Sokka pulled a small, round metal device from his pocket. "The Mechanist gave me this timing device. It looks like we've got about ten minutes until the full eclipse." He slid it back in his pocket, looking around at his allies. "Ten minutes to find the Fire Lord."

"We can still do this," Aang said, his hope restored. "We can still win the day."

"Wait." Katara looked at them anxiously, thinking of how Aang, Sokka and Toph had come to rescue her in Ba Sing Se, and ended up either captured or seriously hurt. "If they knew we were coming, it could all be a trap. Maybe we should use the time we have left to make sure everyone gets out of here safely." Even if most of the invasion force turned back, she and a few others might still be able to check the prison, see if Iroh or any other allies were there, and make an escape.

Hakoda spoke up. "Everyone who's here today came prepared to risk everything for this mission. They know what's at stake. If there's still a chance and there's still hope, I think they would want Aang to go for it."

Sokka turned to the young Avatar. "What do you think? You're the one who has to face the Fire Lord. Whatever you decide, I'm with you."

Aang wavered for a moment, but not much longer than that. He had come here with a mission, determined to accomplish it sooner rather than later. He might not get another chance like this, with so many people willing to help him get to his goal.

He stood and faced the battlefield. "I've got to try."

Sokka stood up as well. "I'm with you guys. We can take Appa."

Toph turned to Katara. "If we're taking Appa, you can drop us off and still have time to rescue Iroh during the eclipse."

Katara hesitated, glancing at Hakoda. She didn't feel right leaving him when he was still injured. But if the invasion ultimately failed, it was even more important that she try to rescue Iroh. She felt torn, though in her heart and mind she knew that saving her father was more imperative: she knew for certain that he was in danger, and he had a family as well as a tribe depending on him.

"I'll wait until the eclipse has started," she decided. "We should be up the volcano by then. I won't have to go far."

Sokka nodded. "Okay. Good luck."

"You too," Katara said, looking at her three friends. Aang smiled confidently at her before taking Toph's hand and running to Appa.

Hakoda spoke up. "What was that about a rescue mission?"

Katara bit her lip. "Once we're in the palace city … there's someone else I have to help. An old friend of mine." It was especially important if there was a chance that the invasion would fail, a possibility made more tangible by the fact that the Fire Lord had known they were coming.

"Do you know what to do?"

"I'm pretty sure."

"Well," Hakoda said, slowly getting to his feet, "don't let me slow you down. We're pressed for time as it is."

Katara blinked, then smiled and stood to help steady him. They could hear Sokka shouting final orders from Appa's head, telling them to resume wedge formation, get across the plaza, and start making their way up the volcano. Then the sky bison took off, heading for a different side of the volcano.

Once the plaza was cleared, it was a long trek up the slope of the volcano. It was even harder with battlement guards sending fireballs raining on them, until one of the commanding officers ordered the firebenders to retreat. It seemed that he had noticed the eclipse about to transpire.

Bato held on to the back of one of the tanks to shout to the other troops. "The eclipse is only minutes away. We should be able to make it up the hill by the time it starts and secure the entire palace by the time it's finished!"

As the other troops cheered, Katara pulled Hakoda with her up to one of the stationary tanks, and banged her fist against the metal. The front compartment slid open, and the two Water Tribe relatives ducked inside.

Teo was the one driving the vehicle. "What's going on?"

"We need to ride with you," Katara said. The tanks weren't likely to face much danger now that the eclipse was starting and the firebenders were retreating. Hakoda could rest, and Katara would get up the volcano faster than she would have on foot.

They were almost at the crest of the mountain when they heard Teo's father shouting outside. "The eclipse is starting! Everyone put on your eclipse glasses."

"Better do what he says," Teo said, taking out his pair, "even if we're looking through these windows."

Katara and Hakoda followed suit, and then turned to look outside. The moon had finally blocked the sun. Then, they felt the tank shift as they reached the summit, angling horizontally and then turning downward.

"Surround the periphery!" Bato shouted. "We have to secure the palace by the time the eclipse is over. Otherwise … we'll be in for the fight of our lives."

They could see into the city now, with the palace in the center of the crater. So this was the place where Zuko and Azula had grown up, Katara thought.

"There is is. The Fire Nation royal palace." Hakoda was smiling proudly. "We've come so far."

"It's not over yet," Katara said. On the other side of the crater, she thought she could see the cylindrical structure of the prison.

Hakoda looked down at her. "If you're still going, now's probably your best chance."

Katara waited another minute, while the earthbenders and Water Tribe warriors forced the city's remaining firebenders to surrender. Once the thanks had arranged themselves around the palace, Katara stepped out. She only paused long enough to look back to Hakoda. "I'll be back when the eclipse is over. Hopefully I won't be alone."

* * *

><p>Katara had been right about it being a trap; that became apparent when they found Azula and two Dai Li agents lying in wait within the bunker. What they hadn't anticipated was the use of them as a decoy.<p>

It was Sokka—the brains behind the mission—who realized that Azula wasn't fighting to capture them; she was holding them off, stalling them when they should have been searching.

"Okay, so what do we do?" Aang asked, slightly perplexed. "Just ignore her?" It seemed exceedingly strange to ignore someone who usually posed such a great threat, who had even come close to killing him when he last saw her.

"We don't have a choice," Sokka said. "We just have to get out of here and find the Fire Lord on our own somehow."

Azula spoke up as they turned away. "It's a trap. Don't say I didn't warn you."

"Ignore!" Sokka called over his shoulder.

"So, Sokka's your name, right? My favorite prisoner used to mention you all the time."

Sokka stopped, turning to look at her suspiciously. Aang and Toph also paused, listening in confusion.

"She was convinced you were going to come _rescue_ her—but, of course, you never came, and she gave up on you."

Aang looked at Sokka, and was startled to see tears running down his anguished face. He had never seen Sokka cry before. He was the eldest in the group, the leader, the warrior. As Toph would say, warriors didn't cry. But people in love did. He shouted something incomprehensible as he charged at Azula.

Toph knew she hadn't been lying about Suki being a prisoner; but she recognized the way Azula braced herself, deceiving him without words, as she slid one of Mai's star daggers up her sleeve. Toph moved quickly, bending a stone up and thrusting it at the princess, pinning her wrists against the earthen wall. Sokka barely noticed; he just grabbed her shoulder and glared at her. "_Where—is—Suki?_" he demanded, speaking slowly.

Azula didn't speak. Sokka's mind was still racing. Why hadn't he seen it sooner? How else could Azula, Mai and Ty Lee have disguised themselves as Kyoshi Warriors?

They had captured the true warriors.

That also explained how the Fire Nation had taken control of the Serpent's Pass, the place where the Warriors had been working.

"Where's Suki?" Sokka demanded. "Answer me!"

Aang put a hand on his shoulder. "Sokka, she won't talk."

For a second, Sokka seriously considered some form of torture; but instead he kept shouting in Azula's face. "Where are you keeping her?"

Azula smiled wordlessly.

He couldn't kill her; then he would never find out where Suki was …

Suddenly they heard something like a small explosion; Toph could feel it in another part of the bunker. "Oh, sounds like firebending's back on," Azula remarked cheerfully, before swinging her leg and sending an arc of blue fire that forced Sokka backward. A moment later she used the force of her fire to break the rock that held her to the wall.

Aang, Toph, and Sokka stood ready for an attack, but Azula only stood and smiled. "Dad's all the way at the end of the hall and down the secret stairway on the left. I'm sure he'll be more than happy to see you now." With that, she turned on her heel and ran away down the tunnel. The others didn't dare follow her, now that she had her firebending back.

"I fell for it!" Sokka exclaimed. "I used up all our time."

"It's not your fault, Sokka," Toph said calmly. "Azula was ready for us. She had every move planned out."

"And now it's too late." They had used up that precious window of opportunity.

"Maybe it's not too late," Aang put in. "The eclipse is over, but I can face the Fire Lord anyway."

"No." Sokka put a hand on his shoulder. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"But I'm ready!" Aang insisted. "I came here with a job to do, and everyone's counting on me."

Toph spoke up, trying to reason. "The Fire Lord knew we were coming this time. We thought we had surprise on our side, but we didn't. It just wasn't our day. What we need to do now is go help our friends."

Aang hung his head, finally accepting that it wasn't going to end today. It would soon, though. "I guess you guys are right."

Sokka put a hand on Aang's shoulder. "You'll get another chance. I know you will."

As Sokka started back down the tunnel, Toph held out her hand in Aang's direction. Neither of them said a word, but Aang took her hand and held on as they ran away together.

* * *

><p>Katara panted as she ran down the deserted streets. She almost wished she was an earthbender, so she could use it to propel herself across the volcanic terrain. But at least the sun wasn't making her even hotter at the moment.<p>

She didn't know how much time she had. She prayed that the eclipse would last long enough for her to at least find Iroh.

But just when the round building came into her line of vision, sunlight started to peek out again. Katara pulled off her eclipse glasses, shielding her eyes as she looked at the sun again. She'd missed her best window of opportunity; that meant any firebenders she met on the way would be capable of fighting her. For a minute she seriously considered turning back.

_"Go find your dad, sweetie. I'll handle this."_

_"Don't worry, Katara. I'll be fine."_

_"You've got to get out of here!"_

Katara grit her teeth and started running again. She was done leaving behind people who needed her, just so she could save herself. She had decided that back in Jang Hui, and she would stick to that decision now.

She came up to the front of the building. The stone walls had craters in them, as though something huge had impacted them. Had the earthbenders been here? That couldn't be … Not knowing what to think of it, Katara ran up the stairs and went inside, relieved that there was no door. The hallway inside seemed to spiral around inside the building.

She stopped when she saw a guard, apparently lying down on the job—as though he'd been hurt, like Hakoda. Katara uncorked her canteens and held the water in the air, poised to strike. "Where is General Iroh being kept?" The guard winced at her loud voice, but regained his senses enough to point and say, "The topmost cell, up the hall, on the right."

Katara turned and jogged through the hallway, noticing its slightly rising slope. She passed several doors that led to other cells, but she saw no other guards. That was strange … but maybe they had been reassigned because of the invasion?

She hadn't realized that she was slowing down. Then, she heard another pair of feet making quick contact with the stone floor. She tried to quicken her pace, staying around the curved bend in the hallway—

"Katara?"

The sound of her name made her stop short, turning around. Her eyes widened, not in shock, but in recognition, as Zuko stopped to stare at her. "You!"

His hair was even longer than it had been last time, but it still didn't completely hide the scar on his face.

Zuko noticed that she looked different. Instead of the braid he remembered so well, she had let her hair fall in waves down her back, with only a bun and hair loopies still in place. She was taller and had filled out more. She looked beautiful, more mature, more powerful—and more formidable.

Katara held her water ready to strike. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to free my uncle."

"You're lying," Katara accused.

"What makes you think that?"

"You just guessed that's why I'm here. If you wanted to free Iroh, you would have done it a long time ago."

Zuko held up his hands, stepping closer. "I swear, I can explain—but I don't have time."

Katara tried to block him. "Stay out of my way!"

"You stay out of my way!"

They both tried to push each other aside; but Katara was the only one who used her bending to do so. The force of her water blast pushed him into the wall, impeding him long enough for her to run past him. But she could hear his feet pounding the floor as he ran just a few yards behind her. Finally, she reached the door at the end of the topmost floor, and found it hanging open.

"Iroh!" Katara shouted, only to stop short and stare at what she saw. She was so caught off guard that she didn't react when Zuko came up next to her and saw it too.

The room wasn't empty; a man lay slumped against the wall, dazed and disoriented. But Iroh was nowhere to be seen. The bars of the cell had been broken and pushed outward.

"What happened here?" Katara demanded.

It was Zuko who knelt down and grabbed the warden by the collar. "Where is my uncle?" the Fire Prince demanded.

"He's gone. He busted himself out," the warden panted. "I've never seen anything like it. He was like a one-man army!"

Katara looked past the two firebenders to the cell that Iroh had inhabited for so long, until just a short while ago—a matter of minutes, surely. He had escaped—on his own. She didn't know how to feel. She hadn't failed, but she hadn't succeeded, either.

He had to have known, back in Ba Sing Se, that his actions would lead to his arrest. Had he been planning to escape all along?

"He must know what he's doing," Katara murmured. If Iroh had taken his fate into his own hands, then it was out of hers, and there wasn't anything more she could do for him. And that meant she could focus, instead, on helping her family and their allies.

She turned and sprinted down the hallway again. She heard Zuko shout after her. "Katara, wait!" He was chasing her, trying to stop her or at least slow her down. Katara knew she didn't have time to fight him, but he wouldn't give up unless she stopped him.

She stopped suddenly, turning on her heel to face him. Zuko's eyes widened when he saw the water coming at him. It hit him with enough force to pin him against the wall; then he felt the water froze into ice over his arms, trapping him in place. He would be able to melt it away, but hopefully it would delay him for a few minutes.

"Just stay away from us!" Katara shouted, her voice thick with tears and hatred.

"I want to help!" Zuko shouted, but Katara was already running away, leaving him for what she hoped would be the last time.

* * *

><p>"Keep your eyes open for Katara!" Sokka told the preteens as they climbed aboard Appa.<p>

"I can't really help you there," Toph said, waving her hand in front of her eyes.

"Right," Sokka muttered. Aang steered Appa over the volcano's summit, into the capital city. As they flew down, the boys could see a new threat. "Oh, no."

"What is it?"

"It's war balloons. They're going to come after the invasion force."

Appa brought them down to the palace, which was surrounded by the tanks and warriors. Sokka looked to Hakoda and Bato as he dismounted Appa. "It was all a trap," Sokka informed them. "Princess Azula knew we were coming, and she's plotted out every move. We just have to get to the beach as fast as we can. If we can make it to the submarines, maybe we can get away safely."

Aang spoke up. "They've got air power, but so do I. I'm going to do what I can to slow them down." He opened his glider and took off, heading for the approaching fleet.

"I can help too. Everyone else, get back to the subs!" Sokka ordered. He climbed onto Appa and followed Aang into the air.

"What is he thinking? He can't bend!" Toph exclaimed as she followed the other earthbenders out of the city.

"Looks like he's using his sword … and a boomerang," Haru said, glancing up at him occasionally.

Of course.

Toph felt Katara's footsteps as she ran up to rejoin the large group. "You're alone," Toph said. "Couldn't find him?"

"He wasn't there; the guard said he escaped on his own. Where are the boys?"

"Trying to slow down the balloons."

"Actually, they're coming back," Haru said, pointing for Katara to see. Appa, Sokka, and Aang landed near them and joined the escape. That's what it was, now; they realized that the city was still the Fire Nation's. They couldn't hold on to it as they'd planned to.

The balloons passed over them on the outer slope of the volcano, dropping bombs on the small invasion force. The earthbenders were able to bend slabs of rock to shelter those on foot; but the caterpillar tanks were badly damaged.

The bombs stopped too suddenly. The teenagers risked coming out to look at the sky, and saw the zeppelins flying right past them.

"Why aren't they turning around to attack us again?" Katara wondered aloud.

"They're headed for the beach," Aang observed. Then he gasped. "They're going to destroy the submarines!"

"How are we all going to escape?" Sokka asked no one in particular.

"We're not," Hakoda said flatly.

Sokka turned to look at him. His expression was resigned, but his voice was determined. "Then our only choice is to stay and fight. We have the Avatar; we could still win!"

"Yes, with the Avatar we could still win—on another day." Hakoda looked at his children. "You kids have to leave. You have to escape on Appa together."

"What?" Katara exclaimed. "We won't leave you behind. We won't leave anyone behind!" She remembered how Iroh had sacrificed his freedom to allow her and Aang to escape from Ba Sing Se. She couldn't let something like that happen again.

"You're our only chance in the long run," Hakoda said adamantly. "You and Sokka have to go with Aang somewhere safe. It's the only way to keep hope alive."

Bato spoke up. "The youngest of our group should go with you. The adults will stay behind and surrender." There was no mistaking the resignation in his voice, the disappointment in his downcast face. "We'll be prisoners, but we'll all survive this battle."

A moment later, they saw the zeppelins drop bombs on the bank where they had left the submarines. Even Huu's plantbending couldn't keep the explosives away. There was no escape for the whole invasion force; but a handful of volunteers could get away on Appa.

The Duke, Teo, and Haru were chosen to escape with Team Avatar. Sokka and Katara bade their father good-bye again, though Sokka promised that this time the separation would be much shorter. Even Tyro said there was a chance that they could escape prison on their own.

Toph and Aang were the only ones who didn't have anyone close to them to say good-bye to. Toph found Aang kneeling on Appa's head. Even though he was silent, she could tell that he was crying. They had hoped that the struggle would end today; but now that their plan had failed, they would have to keep fighting and look for another way.

Toph put a hand on his shoulder. "It'll be okay," she told him. Her voice was quiet but still as strong and firm as ever.

Aang wiped his eyes, trying to pull himself together. Then he stood up, looking at everyone who had joined the invasion force.

"Thank you all for being so brave and so strong. I'm going to make this up to you," he promised.

Toph folded her arms, almost hugging herself. It sometimes seemed like all they ever did was make mistakes and try to make up for them later. Sometimes that was all they could do.

Appa carried seven passengers when he left the Fire Nation capital behind. Thankfully, he flew much faster than the war balloons could travel; none of them tried to give chase in the air. At least, none that they could see.

Aang spoke to the others over his shoulder. "I know just the place for us to go where we'll be safe for a while. The Western Air Temple."

* * *

><p>Zuko was careful to follow from a distance, far enough away that they couldn't see him through the clouds. He'd been lucky to get his hands on one of the air balloons that hadn't been used. He wasn't too worried about losing sight of them; he could guess where they were going. It was the same direction he had gone in when he left his home, three years ago. They were heading for the Western Air Temple.<p>

This was the second time Zuko had left home, knowing that he was unlikely to return, at least not for a very long time. Now, as then, he knew he was going to face challenges and hardships. But now, he was leaving by choice, and that made all the difference. Flying through the sky, leaving the wicked court behind, having spoken the truth to his father and discovered some new truths in the process …

He felt freer than he'd ever been in his life.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: I thought about Katara and Zuko's relationship a lot while at my Confirmation Class two years ago. At the time, we read a chapter entitled "Truth and Freedom," and it really stuck with me. I knew at once that _that_ was the lesson that Zuko had to learn. For the definitions of truth and freedom, I would like to give credit to the creators of _Theology of the Body for Teens_: Brian Butler, and Jason & Crystalina Evert; and to the late Pope John Paul II, whose weekly Theology of the Body homilies inspired Butler and the Everts to create this curriculum for teens.

I made a collage as a sort of cover illustration for this story; the link can be found on my profile page, or you can look up "Cover Art: Finding What You Weren't Looking For" by JackieStarSister on DeviantArt.


	40. The Western Air Temple

_Published July 16, 2013. Happy Zutara Week!_

"The Western Air Temple"

* * *

><p>My lip wobbled. "Give me a reason to trust you."<p>

Patch sat on the corner of the bed, the mattress sinking under his weight. He bent forward, resting his forearms on his knees. His scars were in full view, the candlelight dancing eerie shadows across their surface. The muscles in his back heightened, then relaxed. "Go ahead," he said quietly. "Keep in mind that people change, but the past doesn't."

~ Becca Fitzpatrick, _Hush, Hush_

* * *

><p>While Appa carried the escapees over the ocean, they were able to compare notes and catch up on what had happened to each of them. Katara told them briefly of her encounter with Zuko and what they found at the prison. Toph whistled in appreciation when she learned of Iroh's escape.<p>

"Guess you were right about him being useful to us," Sokka said, folding his arms ruefully, "if we ever caught up with him, that is."

"So, what happened to you guys?" Katara asked, looking to Sokka and Toph, and Aang sitting at Appa's head. "You were going to look for the Fire Lord …" She trailed off when she saw the way Sokka looked down in shame and dejection. Aang didn't turn around, but she saw his shoulders sag in disappointment. It was Toph who summarized how they navigated through the bunker, ran into Azula, and were tricked into fighting her rather than searching for the Fire Lord.

"I messed up," Sokka said miserably. "Because I wanted to know what happened to Suki." Aang had been right: his moment of truth had been down in the bunker. His judgment had been clouded when he learned that the girl he loved had been captured, probably imprisoned, maybe tortured … the thought made him feel nauseous.

Teo looked to Katara, a thought occurring to him. "Do you think this Suki might have been at the prison where you were?"

"I don't know. I actually thought about seeing who else was there," Katara confessed. "But the eclipse ended, and we lost our advantage. There would have been more reinforcements coming to the prison by the time we searched the whole place."

Aang spoke up sadly. "It's my fault. I realized they were expecting us. You gave me the choice of fighting or evacuating. I should have called the whole thing off."

"No," Sokka said. "We all wanted to keep pushing forward."

"We had to try, didn't we?" Toph said, shrugging one shoulder. "And look at it this way: if we had to fail, at least it happened in a way that let everyone survive. Everyone's living to fight another day." It could have been a lot worse. _It could have failed with Ozai beating Aang_.

"I promised myself I wouldn't leave anyone else behind," Katara said, looking down at her hands in her lap.

"It's not enough to keep your own freedom," Haru agreed, speaking from his own experience, "when you know someone you love isn't free."

* * *

><p>Zuko made it to the Western Air Temple around the same time that the Avatar and his friends arrived. But he didn't stay to let them find him; he hid around a corner before retreating back to the nearby forest.<p>

Hiding and evading felt cowardly, but really, he was just nervous. He'd have to be quick to explain himself, or risk being attacked by the people he wanted to help. (There was no end to the irony of the situation.)

Zuko had never been particularly good at public speaking. He told himself that's not what this would be, but that's how it felt as he tried to rehearse what he would say to the other teenagers. He even asked himself what Iroh or Azula would say if they attempted what he was going to do.

"What would Katara do?" Zuko mused. Then he frowned. "No, wait … what _did_ she do?" She had never told him exactly how she ended up tying her fate to the Avatar's. Zuko made a mental note to ask her about it, but he wouldn't be able to do that until after he officially joined their group.

It shouldn't feel this daunting, he thought as he made the trek back to the temple. There had been other times when one or two of them tried to approach the other party peacefully. He remembered the first time, when Sokka had sought his help in rescuing Katara and Avatar Aang. What had Sokka's thoughts been at the time? Maybe it had been an easier decision, since he'd been pressed for time, and knew that his sister and friend's fates depended on him.

Well, the world depended on Zuko now, too. He was the only one who would be willing to teach the Avatar firebending—before Sozin's Comet, at least. They would have to work together if they wanted to end this war. All he had to do was get the Avatar and his friends to understand that.

As he approached, he saw Avatar Aang flying on his glider and the sky bison circling the upside-down temples under the cliff. He reached the platform just as they landed, with their backs facing him. Then the bison stepped out of the way, and they turned and saw him standing there.

He offered a small, calm smile. "Hello. Zuko here."

"You!" Sokka practically spat the word.

"I _told_ you to leave us alone!" Katara exclaimed angrily.

"You didn't give me a chance to explain," Zuko said. "I was planning to follow you anyway."

Aang frowned in confusion. What was Zuko doing? What was his point in telling them this?

"I actually wanted to help during the Eclipse." Zuko rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Only, I didn't think you'd accept my help then."

"No, we wouldn't have," Sokka said flatly.

Zuko took a deep breath, trying to start again. "Look, what I came here to say is … I left home. And I want to help you guys. For good this time. Oh, and I can teach firebending … you know … to you." He looked at Aang at those last words.

Katara thought she might be dreaming. It was certainly the kind of situation she might envision. Hadn't she wished, for a long time, that Zuko would form some kind of permanent alliance with them?

It was Toph who broke the dumbfounded silence. Her tone was somewhere between amusement and annoyance. "Well, it's about time."

The other three rounded on her. "What did you say?" Katara demanded.

"Don't tell me you haven't considered this. I've been half-expecting him to join our side—ever since right after I joined the group."

Sokka glared at her, and then at Zuko. "Are you completely insane? You expect us to believe that after everything you did, all of a sudden you want to switch sides?"

"It's not _all of a sudden_," Zuko countered. "I've had a lot of time to think."

"You had _three years_ to think," Katara interjected. "That's how long you spent hunting Aang. And you're saying you only came to your senses after you did everything you could to capture or kill him?"

Zuko blinked, looking uncertain. "Um … yes."

"You're crazy!"

"All you've ever done is try to hunt us down and capture Aang," Sokka exclaimed. He wanted to add a jab about breaking little sisters' hearts, but thought better of it.

"I've done some good things," Zuko said defensively.

"Yeah, always followed by doing bad things," Katara said.

Toph spoke up thoughtfully. "You know what this reminds me of? Avatar Roku."

"Oh, you mean how, after everything Roku and Sozin went through, Sozin still betrayed him?" Katara said, glaring at Zuko.

"You know about that?" Zuko said in surprise. The others ignored him.

Toph explained, "Aang said their story proves that everyone's capable of good and evil, and that everyone, even people from the Fire Nation, deserve a second chance."

Aang blinked at Toph. "You think that's why Roku told me his story? Because he wants this to happen?"

"Or maybe," Sokka said doggedly, "it was to warn us not to trust the Fire Lord's heir. Roku gave Sozin a second chance, even trusted him to help save his people; but when he _really_ needed his help, Sozin betrayed him."

Zuko looked at Aang and spoke directly to him. "Why aren't you saying anything? You once said you thought we could be friends." He looked at Katara, his eyes pleading. "You know I have good in me."

Katara looked frustrated and uncertain. She looked away for a moment, pondering. Yes, she knew he had goodness in him; she'd known that for a long time, and that was part of what had made her fall for him. But good qualities don't cancel out the bad, any more than sugar is an antidote for poison. Zuko hadn't helped them when it had really mattered. She would be a fool to give him another opportunity to fall short of helping them, or an opportunity to hurt them.

_"Don't hurt your friends, Katara. And don't let them hurt each other!"_

Katara set her jaw, looked Zuko straight in the eye, and said slowly, "For a long time I hoped that this would happen—that you would switch sides. You had every opportunity to join us. But you didn't. And every time I started to trust you, I regretted it, because you betrayed us. Ba Sing Se was the final straw. You didn't just betray us that day; you betrayed Iroh. If you could turn against the one person who was closest to you, how do we know you won't do the same to any of us?"

Aang nodded in agreement. "I did say that maybe we could be friends. I was giving you a chance, or at least something to consider. But you turned it down. Actually, you did more than turn it down; you could have just said no, but instead you attacked me, both then, and a bunch of times since then." His face hardened with anger and resolve." There's no way we can trust you after everything you've done. We'll never let you join us."

Zuko felt shamed by Katara's question, and was stunned by the Avatar's emphasis. "I'm trying to explain, I _regret_ what I've done, but I'm not that person anymore! Can't you give me a chance to prove—"

"No!" Katara shouted, stepping forward. "I won't put my family in danger."

"You think I'm dangerous?" Zuko cried.

"I _know_ you are! Do you need to be reminded?"

He looked at her, more than one memory flashing in his mind's eye. Her angry expression hadn't changed over the past months. "No."

Sokka drew his boomerang from the container on his back. "Either you leave, or we attack."

Zuko made a last-ditch attempt. "I'm not being funny," he swore, dropping to his knees, "but if you won't accept me as a friend, then maybe you'll take me as a prisoner." That would make him even with Katara, and might give him a chance to make them change their minds …

"No," Katara said angrily, "we won't."

His head was bowed, so he didn't see the water coming until it pushed him backwards, soaking him and knocking him facedown on the temple floor. He rolled over and saw Katara still in a defensive stance. Zuko stared at her. "Katara …" He hadn't expected her to welcome him with open arms, but he hadn't expected her to be the first to attack him, either.

"Get out of here, and don't come back," Katara spat. "And if we ever see you again …" She almost faltered; she wasn't good at making threats. "Well … we better not see you again!"

Zuko gaped at the group in disbelief. He was being rejected by the rejects, cast out by the outcasts. He was an outsider, among his friends and foes alike. He couldn't even tell which was which anymore.

As he left the temple, he accepted two things. One was that he'd done everything he could do, at this point, to switch sides—and he'd failed. The other was that Katara was never going to forgive him for hurting her after everything they'd been through together.

* * *

><p>Aang had to wonder if Zuko had overheard their conversation about him needing a firebending teacher. He hated considering his old rival as a teacher—as if he wasn't reluctant enough to learn that element.<p>

_"I'm never going to firebend again. I can't."_

He had thought that the solar eclipse provided an answer—or an excuse—a way to defeat the Fire Lord despite not having mastered all four elements. But Roku had told him that he would need to learn all four by the time Sozin's Comet arrived. And both Katara and Guru Pathik had insisted that he would need to learn firebending eventually.

_ "You will never find balance if you deny this part of your life. You are the Avatar, and therefore, you are a firebender."_

While Aang was pondering his and Zuko's abilities, Katara and Sokka were setting up sleeping bags and talking about Zuko's surprise visit.

"I just can't believe his nerve," Katara said. "I mean, how stupid does he think we are?"

"He wants you to trust him and feel sorry for him, so you let your guard down, _then_ he strikes." Sokka punched his fist emphatically.

Katara looked at Sokka, pain in her blue eyes. That was exactly what Zuko had done to her. She couldn't have put it better herself. "The thing is, it worked," she said quietly, kneeling and setting the sleeping bag down. "I _did_ feel sorry for him. I saw that he was really confused and hurt." She stood up again and faced Sokka. "But when the time came, he made his choice, and we paid the price. We can't trust him."

Toph spoke up, leaning against a stone pillar with her arms crossed. "I get why you're all so doubtful. But, if he could find us so easily, I can't see why he'd try to go through with some charade. If he wanted to stop us, he could just lead a fleet of airships to find us. But he hasn't."

"That doesn't mean he _won't_," Sokka argued. "He's still the same guy who chased us from one end of the globe to the other."

Toph shrugged indifferently. "I'm just saying that considering his messed-up family and how he was raised, he could have turned out a lot worse."

Katara's tone was serious. "I know that—in fact, I know more about his past than you do. But a rough childhood doesn't justify everything he's done. He had every opportunity to join us, and he didn't."

Toph had an empathetic expression on her face. "All I know is that while he was talking to us, he was sincere. He wasn't lying." She paused, and then said tentatively, "Maybe you're all just letting your hurt feelings keep you from thinking clearly."

"You've only ever met him twice," Sokka said. "You weren't there when he burned down Kyoshi Island—and had pirates attack us—and all the other times he tried to capture Aang. He even came pretty close a few times. If you'd been there, you wouldn't think so nicely about him now."

"Why would you even _try_ to defend him?" Katara asked.

Toph finally moved from her post, stepping up to confront them. "Because you're all ignoring one crucial fact." She stood next to Aang, pointing a finger at him. "Aang _needs_ a firebending teacher."

Aang intervened. "You don't know what Zuko's like when he's firebending, Toph. He's always _angry_ when he firebends. I don't want to do it the way he does. I'm not having him as my teacher."

"Darn right you're not, buddy," Sokka said, coming over to stand next to the other two.

"Well, I guess that's settled," Katara said, folding her arms.

Toph made an incredulous, frustrated noise, then turned on her heel. She spoke to them over her shoulder as she stalked away. "Sometimes I wonder who's really the blind one around here."

Aang watched her go, wondering if she meant something more by that, but then he shook his head and turned back to help the siblings set up their new camp.

* * *

><p>It had been months since Zuko slept outdoors—the last time had been during his exile in the Earth Kingdom. And here he was now, sleeping under a makeshift tent, if you could call a war balloon tarp draped over tree branches a tent. It wasn't cold, so the lack of real walls didn't bother him as much as the hard ground.<p>

Awaking at any slight disturbance was an instinct he'd developed while being hunted. So when he heard movement—breaking branches and shifting dirt—somewhere in the trees, he bolted upright, calling out into the darkness. "Who's there?"

"It's me!"

It felt like a reenactment of a scene they'd already experienced. The little blind earthbender girl—Toph, Zuko reminded himself—came out into the clearing, holding her hands up in front of her.

"Toph." It was the first time he'd said her name. He tried to look at the dark forest behind Toph. "Are the others with you?"

"No, I came alone. They don't even know that I'm here."

"Why _are_ you here?" Zuko's tone was slightly suspicious, but not unkind.

"I wanted to talk to you," Toph said simply. "I felt kind of bad about kicking you out of the Temple, and I think you could be helpful to us."

Zuko's face lit up with hope. So there was still a chance for him. At least one person was willing to give him that chance.

Toph sat down cross-legged on the ground. Zuko glanced around his makeshift campsite, which was little more than a campfire and his canopy-tent. He knew what Iroh would have done if he was here. "Um … do you want some tea, or something?"

"Sure. Don't mind if I do."

Zuko got a tea chest from his tent and sat by the fire opposite Toph. Preparing the tea over the fire bought him a few minutes' time, before he'd have to try explaining himself again.

"I can tell you're nervous," Toph said.

He looked at her, startled. "How—what makes you think that?"

She patted the soft dirt on the ground. "I can feel your heart rate. Y'know, I thought tea was supposed to calm people down."

"It usually does." Zuko poured the tea into two cups and handed one to her. "Here."

Toph accepted it and took a sip. "Hmm. It reminds me of your uncle's tea."

Zuko looked at her in surprise. "When did you ever have my uncle's tea?"

"It was not long after I joined Aang and Katara and Sokka. Azula was chasing us, we were sleep-deprived, and Katara and I were getting on each other's nerves. You know how she can be."

"Uh-huh."

"I walked out of camp, and then I ran into your uncle. I attacked him—"

"You what?"

"—because he was hiding, but he was cool about it. He gave me tea and we talked about our problems." Toph paused to sip her tea, and then added quietly, "Iroh told me that I reminded him of you—that we both want to do everything on our own."

Zuko stared at the little earthbender. He hadn't known … "Did he say anything else about me?"

"He was tracking you. He said he knew that you didn't want him around, but that he wanted to be there in case you needed him." Zuko felt guilty and sad, hearing this. Iroh had always been there for him, even when Zuko didn't want his help. Toph continued, "Iroh said that your life had recently changed, and that you were trying to figure out who you were."

Zuko bowed his head, before remembering that she was blind, so he didn't need to avoid eye contact when he felt shame. But she somehow seemed to read the emotion behind his silence. "You miss him, don't you?" Toph said softly.

"Yeah." Zuko looked at the campfire for a moment, and then glanced back at Toph. "What about you? Do you … have a family you miss?" He knew even less about this girl than he did about Katara and Sokka; he knew that they had allied with the Avatar partly so Katara could find a waterbending master. He didn't know how or why Toph had joined the Avatar.

Toph didn't answer right away. When she did, her voice was tight. "I try not to think about them. But if I'm completely honest with myself … yes, I miss them."

Zuko looked at her with a questioning expression she could not see.

"I ran away," Toph said, answering his unspoken question.

"Another thing we have in common," Zuko said with a wry smile.

Toph laughed a little, but her eyes were sad. "Yeah … and I know what it's like to have a complicated relationship with your parents," she said quietly. "They didn't really understand me … and I pretended to be the person they wanted me to be, a polished little lady, when all I wanted to do was earthbend." She downed the rest of her tea, spat out the dregs, and wiped her mouth with the back of her dirty hand—most unladylike behavior. "It was Aang who showed me there was another way."

"So, how did _you_ join them?"

"I didn't ask for it. They sought me out, because Aang needed an earthbending teacher. I guess I was the first one outside of their trio to join."

"And was it what you expected?"

"Oh yeah, almost getting killed every other day was just what I wanted when I signed up."

Zuko actually laughed a little at that. Toph laughed too, before giving a serious answer. "Sometimes it's hard, but sometimes it's really fun. I feel like I belong, way more than I did back home." Toph set her now empty cup on the ground. "But, I didn't come here to talk about me. This is about _you_."

"Okay. So … do you think you can convince them to listen to me?"

"I can try. They weren't too keen on it after you left." Toph paused. "What's the deal with you and Katara?"

Zuko looked away shamefully. "I don't like to talk about it. It's not really important anyway."

"I don't think that's true," Toph said gently. "It had a big impact on the way Katara thought about you."

He seemed surprised at that. "What—has she talked to you about me?"

"Only a little. I still don't totally understand what happened."

Zuko took a swig of tea, trying to buy some time. Finally he set his cup down and said, "Last winter, I kidnapped Katara to bait the Av—Aang, I mean."

Toph hooted. "No way!"

Zuko shrugged. "She was on my ship for a week—maybe longer—and we got to know each other better. We started to respect each other, and then … we were starting to care about each other, but neither of us wanted to admit it. It was dangerous, for both of us. But we ended up helping each other, at different times. There were other people trying to capture Aang, and I helped protect him and Katara."

"So that you could capture him yourself?"

"Well … yeah. And because saving Katara was the right thing to do," Zuko said, sounding a little defensive.

"Hey, I'm not judging," Toph said, closing her eyes and holding up one hand.

Zuko looked at her, and then stared down at his tea. He could remember the first and last time he'd shared tea with Katara, back in Ba Sing Se. The words left his mouth before he could stop them. "Does Katara hate me?"

Toph didn't answer right away; Zuko wasn't sure whether that was a good or bad sign. Finally she said, "She has a lot of hurt and anger built up in her, directed at you. But sometimes I've suspected that she still has feelings for you, which makes her frustrated with herself. And I think she felt angry at herself for being so stupid, because she kept forgiving you—like some weak girl who forgives her abusive boyfriend and can't bring herself to break up with him." Toph frowned. "I'm sorry, that came out totally wrong."

"No, it makes sense. If you're right, then you're a pretty perceptive kid." Zuko looked in the teapot. "Do you want any more?"

"Sure."

Zuko refilled her cup, remembering something he'd wanted to ask about. "Earlier today, you mentioned Avatar Roku."

"Yeah. Aang recently found out that he was friends with Fire Lord Sozin, before the war started."

"Does Aang know that Roku was my great-grandfather on my mother's side?"

Toph was silent for a beat; her eyebrows were raised in surprise behind her long bangs. "No, I don't think he's aware—or he would have mentioned it."

"My uncle told me that, after sending me to learn about Sozin's history." Zuko glanced back at his tent, and then got to his feet. "Can you bring Aang something from me?"

"Maybe. Depends on what it is."

Zuko went to his small pack and retrieved the metal artifact that Iroh had given him, before coming back and kneeling next to Toph. "Sozin gave this to Roku before he left the Fire Nation. Aang will probably recognize it." He placed the hair ornament in her hand and wrapped her small, dirty fingers around it. "My uncle said I need to know the story so I could determine my own destiny. I want to make up for everything I did to Aang, and for what Sozin did to Roku … and everything my country's done to hurt the other nations."

"You want to make up for _all_ of that?" Toph looked slightly skeptical. Zuko realized that sounded rather idealistic.

"Okay, maybe I can't make up for all of that by myself; but I want to help you guys put a stop to this war."

"That's fair." Toph stood up to leave. "If you come to the Air Temple tomorrow, I might be able to get them to listen to you."

Zuko looked up at her, in wonder. "Why are you doing this?"

"Mainly because of Aang—he needs to learn firebending."

"They know that, but they aren't reaching out to me. What have I done to make _you_ trust me?"

"Well …" Toph shrugged. "You may have done some bad things, but I don't think you're a bad person. Katara and Iroh have both said that you have good in you. Even Aang and Sokka admit that you've helped them before. And it's in your favor to do it again." With that she started to walk away.

"Toph?" She paused at the edge of the campsite, turning her head just slightly to hear him. "Thank you." Zuko didn't know what else to say.

He couldn't see Toph's smile as she turned her head forward and left. But after that, he was able to sleep more peacefully, feeling a better sense of resolve—and for the first time in a while, a sense of mutuality, and maybe even friendship.

* * *

><p>At breakfast, Aang bypassed the usual morning greetings to ask everyone a question: "Has anyone seen Toph?"<p>

He didn't like fighting with Toph, or having her be mad or at odds with him. But if she'd had the night to cool down, then maybe they could make amends today.

"I haven't seen her since she stormed off yesterday," Sokka said. The Earth Kingdom boys opted to look for her while they explored the Air Temple further.

Just then, Toph walked casually into the fountain room. "Morning, everyone." The others stared or blinked in surprise as she sat down between Aang and Sokka and helped herself to a bowl of food.

"You're awfully chipper," Sokka remarked.

"Where have you been?" Katara asked, almost sounding like a mother.

"At Zuko's campsite," Toph replied nonchalantly.

The others looked at her, all of them either startled or surprised. "You mean, making sure he wasn't up to anything?" Sokka ventured.

"No. I talked to him last night."

Katara dropped her bowl of rice. "You saw Zuko? _Alone?_"

Toph blinked, before a mischievous look crossed her face. "What, are you jealous?"

"I don't—" Katara seemed to catch herself, before she made any indignant reply. "You know, I'm not even going to argue."

"Wait," Aang said, holding his hand up. "Toph, you said you and Zuko talked? What did you talk about?"

"Not much. Just whether or not he could teach you firebending."

"Why is it still up for discussion?" Sokka asked. "We already decided—"

"_You_ guys decided," Toph said, pointing at him with her chopsticks. "I wasn't convinced. I thought he could be helpful to us … and if I talked to him, maybe we could work something out. Oh, and he said to give you this." Toph pulled the metal object out of her belt and held it out toward Aang. Katara and Sokka were nonplussed, but Aang studied it, his eyes widening in recognition after a moment.

"Is that …"

"He said it was Avatar Roku's."

"I saw Sozin give it to him, that night of the solstice! How did Zuko get it?"

"Apparently, Roku is his other great-grandfather. He said Iroh had told him the story … 'cause it had to do with his destiny." Toph shrugged one shoulder. "Anyway, I told him to come back this morning."

Katara rounded on her. "Toph, you can't go around making decisions that impact the rest of us!"

"I can't say I'm sorry," Toph said frankly.

"You—ugh!" Katara threw her arms down, inadvertently bending the water in the fountain and causing some to splash over the sides.

"Thanks for putting us all in jeopardy, Toph," Sokka said sarcastically.

"I did it for Aang," was Toph's only defense.

Aang turned the headpiece over in his hands, before looking back at Toph. "I don't like that you went behind our backs," he said. He hated even more the idea that Toph had put herself in possible danger. "But if you feel so strongly about it … I'll meet him."

Toph smiled in satisfaction and popped some rice into her mouth.

Katara paced around the perimeter of the temple extension, looking out at the valley below and the forest in the distance. She had been so tired, for so long, of not knowing how Zuko fit into her life. After escaping Ba Sing Se, classifying him as an enemy had brought a degree of certitude in the way she thought about him. She'd stood steadfastly in that opinion yesterday. But now it still seemed uncertain; the winds of fate might even be pushing him into their group.

Over the past three seasons, Katara had kept coming to new conclusions about Zuko, whenever she encountered him. But she'd always tried to think about him in a way that would allow her to move on. If he was there, living and working among them, then she couldn't just ignore his existence and forget about him in the grand scheme of things. He wasn't just part of her past; he was part of her present, and it looked as though he would be part of her future as well, at least for the next few weeks.

If she never saw him again, then she could let him fade in her memory, and her anger could dull.

But if she saw him and had close contact with him regularly … what then? Could she treat him like a teammate—an equal? Could she forget about the feelings of closeness on the one hand and hatred on the other?

She wouldn't have to wait long to find out.

* * *

><p>Zuko came back a short while later, and found the four teammates waiting for him. This time, he knew what he wanted to say, speaking from his heart.<p>

"Listen, I know I didn't explain myself very well yesterday. I've been through a lot in the past few years, and it's been hard. But I'm realizing that I had to go through all those things to learn the truth. I thought I had lost my honor, and that somehow my father could return it to me. But I know now that no one can give you your honor. It's something you earn for yourself, by choosing to do what's right."

Katara clenched her jaw, remembering something she had told Zuko. _"No one can give or take your honor. Honor means being strong, moral, loyal, and ethical."_ She wondered if those words had really affected him the way she'd wanted them to when she spoke them. If so, it was about time. But if not …

"All I want now is to play my part in ending this war. And I know my destiny is to help you restore balance to the world."

Sokka and Katara still looked at him with doubt and resentment. Aang's expression was harder to read. He glanced back at his friends, and then faced Zuko again.

"Can we talk?" Aang gestured to the inner halls of the Temple.

"You think that's a good idea?" Sokka said, his voice high with incredulity.

Katara finally spoke up. "He won't try anything while we're here." It wasn't a reassurance for her friends; it was a warning directed at Zuko.

Zuko followed Aang into the temple proper. Neither of the boys seemed sure how to start this discussion.

"So," Zuko began.

"So what?" Aang questioned.

"So … what's your answer?"

"I don't know. I guess … well, it's not just you. It's firebending. I don't like it. And I don't know if I'd like learning it from you. No offense," he added quickly, holding up his hands.

"None taken."

They passed the Hall of Statues where the Earth Kingdom boys were racing on Teo's wheelchair. Zuko caught a glimpse of them. The eldest looked about his age; the youngest couldn't be more than eight. These were other kids who had helped in the invasion. They'd been separated from their families, and yet they were playing like the kids they were.

Aang's voice pulled him out of his wonder. "You wouldn't be the first person to teach me firebending."

Zuko looked to him in surprise. "Someone else taught you?"

Aang nodded. "Master Jeong Jeong. He said that I wasn't ready, that I needed to learn water and earth first, but he agreed to teach me anyway. I got impatient, because all he wanted me to do was learn to restrain my fire power. The last time I tried firebending … I burned Katara. And then I never wanted to use it again."

Zuko hesitated, then said, "I burned her once, too. Did she tell you that?"

"I don't remember … when was that?"

"Back when she was on my ship … she tried to duel me … she started it, but it was my fault that she got hurt. I fought too hard." Zuko sighed. "I know I'm not the best teacher you could have. I could still stand to learn more. Fire can be dangerous and wild. So as a firebender, I need to be careful and control my bending so I don't hurt people unintentionally."

Aang was surprised, almost startled into realization. He bowed his head, then looked at Zuko steadfastly. "I think you _are_ supposed to be my firebending teacher." Zuko said nothing, just looked at the young Avatar. Aang explained, "Now I know you understand how easy it is to hurt the people you love."

It was true, Zuko realized. He had hurt Katara, and Iroh, and even Mai and Ty Lee, to various degrees. Often it had been unintentional.

Aang held up his hands and bowed. "I'd like you to teach me."

Zuko smiled warmly and bowed back to him. "Thank you."

"I still have to ask my friends if it's okay with them."

They turned and went back to the area with the hourglass fountain. Toph and the Water Tribe siblings stood when they saw the boys returning.

"I'm willing to let Zuko join the group permanently," Aang informed them. "But I still want to hear what you have to say." He looked to Toph first. "Toph, I think you've made your opinion pretty clear, but …"

"Ah, let him join," Toph said, leaning back on her arms.

"Sokka?"

The Water Tribe warrior hung his head for a moment, looking frustrated and reluctant. But then he shrugged. "Hey, all I want to do is to defeat the Fire Lord. If you think this is the way to do it, then … I'm all for it."

Aang nodded and then turned to his waterbending master. "Katara?"

She looked from Aang to Zuko, frowning deeply. Zuko felt sweat break out on his forehead. Would Katara be able to cope with living together? Would she trust him enough to let him join the group? If she refused, what would happen to him?

Katara looked back at Aang with a hardened expression. "I'll go along with whatever you think is right," she said flatly.

Aang smiled in acceptance. Zuko felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest. "I won't let you down," he said, smiling and stepping forward. "I promise."

Katara shot him a glare. "Don't think that this changes anything." She turned on her heel and walked away.

Aang knelt down next to their supplies and retrieved the hair ornament that Toph had delivered. Then he stood and held it out to Zuko. "I think you should hold on to this. I appreciate the thought, but it's not too practical for me." Aang patted his bald head.

Zuko half-smiled, taking back the headpiece. "Thanks."

"No. Thank you."

Katara heard this exchange and thought, _Don't thank him yet._

* * *

><p>While Aang and Toph explained to the Earth Kingdom boys about their new addition to the company, Zuko made one trip back to his campsite to bring the war balloon and his few belongings to the Air Temple. In an awkward attempt at hospitality, Sokka offered to show him to an empty bedroom, which Zuko accepted even though most of the group would be camping outside. It would be nice to still have a place of his own, even if it was only temporary.<p>

He heard Sokka say to Aang as he left, "This is really weird." He agreed. And yet, it was less weird than it might have been had he never allied himself with these kids before.

As he unpacked, Zuko pulled out a small portrait he'd brought of Iroh. His uncle looked just as he had as a retired general, with a topknot in place and his beard and sideburns trimmed the way he liked them. Even represented in ink on paper, he had a calm, subtly kind demeanor about his expression. Zuko could remember Iroh accompanying him the last time he'd come to this temple.

_"If I have to, I will spend every day of the rest of my life hunting the Avatar. I know it's my destiny to capture him."_

_"You know, Prince Zuko, destiny is a funny thing. You never know how things are going to work out. But if you keep an open mind and an open heart, I promise you will find your own destiny someday."_

Zuko smiled. Iroh had been right. Now, he felt certain that he was on the right path—more certain than he had ever been during his three-year search.

Suddenly he turned his head and saw Katara leaning against the doorframe, her arms folded, looking at him. She saw what he was holding. Zuko stood up and faced her, about to speak, but Katara spoke first.

"Do you have any idea where Iroh might have gone?"

Zuko shook his head. "I really don't."

She closed her eyes and bowed her head. Her hardened expression didn't change, though her tone was hard to place. "That headpiece is the only reason I have for letting you near Aang. If Iroh wanted you to know that story, and talked to you about your destiny … then he may have _wanted_ you to do this. Or still wants it, wherever he is now."

Zuko started to relax, hearing this concession. But then Katara's eyes turned sharply on him again. "But even if you're telling the truth about wanting to help, that doesn't guarantee you won't change your mind again. You and I both know you've struggled with doing the right thing in the past."

She walked up to Zuko, whose mouth dropped open slightly as he looked at her. "So let me tell you something right now. You make one step backward, one slip-up—give me one reason to think you might hurt Aang—and you won't have to worry about your destiny anymore." She leaned forward and said menacingly, "Because I'll make sure your destiny ends, right then and there, permanently."

Zuko stared at Katara, stunned, as she turned on her heel and walked away. In the past, they'd agreed that they would have to fight against each other; but somehow, he had never expected her to openly threaten to kill him.

Katara didn't seem like the same person she'd been back when she was his prisoner. She was stronger, less idealistic, and less trusting.

To be fair, Zuko was not the same person he had been. He had struggled and suffered, seen how much devastation his people had inflicted on the other Nations, learned the true meaning of honor, and realized that he was free to choose his own destiny.

"Katara," Zuko said suddenly. She stopped, turned around and looked at him. He raised his shoulders helplessly. "I'm sorry," he said. He knew it needed to be said, and yet it didn't seem like nearly enough.

Her expression was still dark, but there was also another emotion in her eyes—disappointment, or maybe sadness. "So am I," Katara said tonelessly.

They looked at each other for a moment, but they had nothing more to say to each other. Finally Katara turned and walked out of the room. She closed the door behind her. Then she leaned back against the door, squeezing her eyes shut, trying to ignore the burning feeling in her eyes, in her throat, in her heart. She buried her face in her hands and slid down to the floor.

She didn't cry. She was done crying over that firebender. But she couldn't stop the feelings of anger and dread welling up inside her. She didn't know how she was going to get through the next few weeks.

She took her hands down from her face, studying them. These hands had learned a lot in the past year—how to heal, and how to hurt. Could she really force these hands to kill Zuko? She knew in her mind that she would, in order to protect her family—the Avatar—the world. And if doing so hurt her heart—well, too bad for her heart. She would get over Zuko's death more easily than she'd get over losing the war, or losing any of her true friends.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I made some slight changes to the earlier chapters of this story. I added a bit of dialogue between Iroh and Zuko while Katara is tied to the tree. Also, I combined a couple short chapters to make them a bit longer; this means that the overall number of chapters went backwards. If this prevents you from reviewing this chapter because you've already reviewed the old Chapter 40, try leaving your review at an earlier chapter that you _didn't_ review.

I can't take credit for the line "good qualities don't cancel out the bad, any more than sugar is an antidote for poison." It's an Arab proverb that I found on the Internet.

I have a couple reasons for why Zuko's encounter with Toph went differently. One is that Toph didn't really sneak in so much as walk right in, as she did last time she saw Zuko. Another is that Zuko is somewhat less suspicious and defensive, since he's worked with some of these individuals in the past.

In case you didn't catch it, the "I'm sorry"/"So am I" exchange is supposed to echo the one they had in "The Siege of the North" chapter. (I actually wrote it in this scene before I decided to also include it in "The Siege of the North.")

Artwork: "Zutara: Apologize" by Elocinaqui and "Pride" by Abayomi on DeviantArt


	41. Motives

_Published September 7, 2013_

"Motives"

There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something (or so Thorin said to the younger dwarves). You certainly usually find something, if you look, but it is not always quite the something you were after. So it proved on this occasion. ~ J.R.R. Tolkien, _The Hobbit_

* * *

><p>The newly expanded Team Avatar and their company tried to go through the motions of everyday life. They had now before them a semi-permanent settlement—a place where they could camp out for an extended period—and a stretch of time in which they had no plans. It was the perfect opportunity for Aang to start the next phase of his Avatar training.<p>

It was time for him to learn and master firebending.

Aang told himself this was the beginning of the end. Fire was the last element he had to learn; then he would be a fully realized Avatar, possibly—no, _definitely—_capable of defeating the Fire Lord.

Zuko, for his part, was glad to have this task of teaching to keep himself busy. It was tricky enough falling into the rhythm of this ragtag gang's lifestyle. He was especially wary, almost hyperaware, around Katara; she seemed to make a point of not looking at him, though he felt her mistrustful gaze when he wasn't looking at her.

At least she trusted him enough to let him be alone with Aang while they tried firebending at different altitudes of the upside-down Air Temple. But Zuko suspected that Sokka was acting on Katara's instruction when he came down to watch their lesson. Or what was supposed to be a lesson. Zuko wasn't too surprised by the Avatar's minute fire power—he lacked the experience and determination—but he was dismayed by his own lack of ability.

Just days ago he had redirected lightning; that had been arguably his greatest accomplishment as a firebender! And now he could barely conjure a flame. His own firepower was about equal to what spark rocks could make.

After trying firebending at different altitudes and failing each time, Zuko finally called for a break, until he got a hold on his own fire. Aang agreed and went off to practice training with Toph and Katara. Zuko spent the rest of the afternoon alternately meditating, going through forms, and just trying to make fire in his hands. He could conjure a little fire, but something was keeping him from lashing out with it in his fighting forms.

_How am I going to tell them?_ They had let him join for the purpose of teaching Aang firebending. What was he going to do if he couldn't make good on his part of the deal?

He watched from a slight distance as they gathered around the fountain for dinner. Zuko wondered if he was supposed to join them, or wait to be invited. After waiting for a while, he decided it would probably be best to own up to his problem. He'd have to talk to Aang about it sooner or later, anyway.

"Listen everybody." The others turned their heads to look at him. "I've got some pretty bad news. I've lost my stuff."

Toph, who couldn't see the way Zuko hung his head in dejection, held up her hands innocently. "Don't look at me. I didn't touch your stuff."

"I'm talking about my firebending," Zuko informed her. "It's gone."

Katara laughed, louder and longer than Zuko had ever heard her before. The others looked at her, surprised by Zuko's announcement and confused by her reaction. "I'm sorry," she said, though she didn't sound like she meant it. "I'm just laughing at the irony. You know … how it would have been nice for us if you lost your firebending a long time ago?"

She didn't believe him. She didn't believe that he could have been so powerful while fighting against them in the past, and not have the same power now that he'd joined them. "Well it's not lost," Zuko clarified, "it's just … weaker, for some reason."

"Maybe you're just not as _good_ as you think you are," Katara suggested harshly, before taking a sip from her bowl.

"Ouch," Toph remarked.

Aang looked at Katara curiously. "Didn't you have trouble with waterbending, once?" Katara froze, holding her bowl halfway between her mouth and her lap. Aang prompted gently, "You said it had to do with emotions."

Reluctantly, Katara lowered her bowl. "Yeah. You should remember," she said, glancing up at Zuko. "Iroh taught us about it."

Then he remembered. The first time he tried to work with lightning, he had been unable to do so; Iroh had said it was because of the turmoil inside him. But he had been able to redirect lightning on the Day of Black Sun, because he had come to a conclusion that finally gave him some peace of mind.

That turmoil had probably had a lot to do with the suffering and anxiety he'd experienced just from being banished and not knowing where his life would go. But Iroh had hinted—and Zuko had adamantly denied—that part of that turmoil had also been caused by how unsettled Katara made him feel.

That surely couldn't be the case now. At least, not in the same way.

_I'm not still in love with her. I just feel bad that we'll never know, and guilty that I hurt her so much, so often._ He could admit that much to himself, and spelling it out made him feel more secure in his own emotions.

_I don't wish we were together that way. I just wish I could make it up to her._

_I don't want her love. I just want her acceptance—her trust—and maybe her friendship._

He knew from experience that he could live without her love. But if they were going to fight together in this war, he couldn't survive without her trust. And what would make living really worthwhile would be her friendship.

All these thoughts ran through Zuko's mind in a matter of seconds, while the others were still talking. He tuned in to the conversation when Toph suggested finding a different source from which to draw his bending. His respect for her increased when he heard the story of how she'd learned how to "see" the world from the earthbending badgermoles.

"That's amazing, Toph." Aang's admiration could not be mistaken. "I learned from the monks, but the original airbenders were the flying bison."

"Well, this doesn't help me," Zuko said. "The original firebenders were the dragons, and they're extinct."

This was met by a brief silence, which was broken by Aang. "Extinct, like how the airbenders went extinct? Because I'm still alive."

"Good point," Katara approved.

"Well, they're not around anymore. … But the first people to learn from the dragons were the ancient Sun Warriors."

"Sun Warriors? Well, I know _they_ weren't around when I was a kid."

"No, they died off thousands of years ago; but their civilization wasn't too far from where we are now. Maybe we can learn something from poking around their ruins."

Katara looked up sharply at this. Was Zuko suggesting that they move the whole group, or that he would take Aang alone to these mysterious ancient ruins?

Worse was that Aang seemed keen on the idea; now that he had decided to learn firebending, he was determined to do whatever it took. And Zuko seemed to have already earned his new student's trust. Aang was perfectly all right with going on a one-on-one field trip with Zuko.

The two would-be firebenders spent the rest of the dinner hour making plans for their trip. They could leave the very next day—the sooner, the better.

"Is this really a good idea?" Katara said in a low voice .

"If you're worried about Zuko turning on Aang," Toph said, "I think he's well-trained enough to handle himself. He can take Zuko on if he has to."

"But if he leads him into a trap, or gets other firebenders to follow them back …"

Sokka spoke up. "He escaped from Zhao's prison, didn't he?"

"Yeah, with—" Katara bit back her words. _With Zuko's help_. He was the variable factor, him and his mercurial motives.

"I don't get what it is they expect to happen," Sokka said. "I mean, they aren't expecting to find a dragon to teach them."

"You still don't get it, do you?" Toph said. "It's not just about who you learn your skill from; it's about … figuring out why and how you want to use it. I wanted to learn earthbending so I could _see_. Zuko and Aang need to think about why they want to know and use firebending."

"And visiting a ruined city is supposed to help them?"

Toph shrugged her shoulders, making a sound in her throat like, _I don't know_.

* * *

><p>Aang and Zuko returned in the afternoon of their second day away. Katara felt surprise, relief, and happiness all at once, seeing them return safely. She hadn't known whether to expect Aang to come back, after he went off with Zuko alone. But not only was he alive, free, and unscathed, he had also successfully learned how to firebend.<p>

"I understand it now," Aang said excitedly, as he told them about it over dinner. "I had a mental block, because I was so scared of hurting people with fire; and Zuko had an emotional block. I mean, we've known all along that he's driven; he just needed to—"

"Reaffirm what my purpose is now," Zuko finished, looking from Aang out to the rest of the group. "That's helping you guys."

Aang insisted that he and Zuko show the others the form they had learned, a routine like a dance. Now they could incorporate actual fire with the moves they had learned.

"Yeah, that's a great dance you two learned there," Sokka complimented, semi-sarcastic, when they were done.

"It's not a dance," Zuko said defensively. "It's a firebending form."

Sokka was still smirking. "We'll just tapdance our way to victory over the Fire Lord.

"It's a sacred form that happens to be thousands of years old!"

"Oh yeah?" Katara's voice was childishly antagonistic. "What's your little form called?"

Zuko was clearly embarrassed when he muttered the answer. "The Dancing Dragon."

Now, Katara wasn't the only one who laughed at Zuko. Sokka and the Earth Kingdom kids did too. It was Aang who nudged Zuko and said, "Don't worry. If they're making jokes about you, it means they've accepted you."

Toph spoke up. "I can't believe you got a new dancing partner, Aang," she said, feigning resentment. Aang frowned in surprise, but then Toph smiled. She was joking.

"I could teach it to you, if you want. Or we could make up a dance like it for earthbending."

"Maybe."

Katara spoke to Sokka in an undertone. "I get the feeling they're not telling us everything about what happened."

Sokka shrugged. "Maybe it's between them." Wasn't that part of bonding, having secrets that were kept private between friends? It was probably good for them.

Toph waited until the following morning before confronting Aang. "I wanted to talk to you more about your trip."

"What about it?"

Toph led him away from the main area, into the halls of the temple where they could talk in privacy. "There were a couple times when I thought you might have been lying … or leaving out some of the truth."

Aang hadn't anticipated this. Toph waited, not pressing him, but silently demanding an answer.

"Okay, I'll tell you, but only because I trust you not to tell anyone else about this."

"Okay." It occurred to Toph that this was the first time she'd been alone with Aang, since they said farewell on the Day of Black Sun. She fought back a blush at the memory and listened to what Aang told her.

"We _did_ find some of the original firebenders: the Sun Warriors, and two dragons named Ran and Shaw. They're alive, but they have to stay a secret, or else other people would try to hunt and kill the dragons. It was amazing, Toph. Zuko and I did the dance for them, and they judged us, and then they breathed fire all around us—" Here he faltered, not sure how to describe it to her. "Do you—have an idea of what color is?"

Toph shrugged one shoulder. "It's got something to do with light, right?"

"Well, yeah. If there's light, then you can see what colors things are. Fire is usually limited to a few colors—red, which is the main color of the Fire Nation, and also yellow and orange. Azula's firebending comes out blue, for some reason … anyway, when Ran and Shaw showed us their firebending, it was every color in the rainbow, all around Zuko and me. I'd never seen a fire like that before. That's how I learned what fire really is. It's light, and heat, and energy. And firebending—it's like having the sun inside you. It was one of the best feelings I've ever had."

"That sounds amazing." Toph looked just as impressed with his story as he had been with her tale of the badgermoles.

Aang smiled, then stood up. "How'd you like to learn the Dancing Dragon?"

Toph tilted her head, considering. Aang pouted, before remembering that she couldn't see it, so he wheedled, "Please? I'll tell Zuko this counts as my firebending training for today. Only it'll really be time with you … you know, since we haven't had much lately …" He trailed off, slightly embarrassed.

But he'd convinced Toph, who had missed him while he was away and wanted to take advantage of the fact that he was back. "Okay."

Eventually Zuko did call Aang over to practice actually making flames. They started going through practical forms. Aang noticed that Zuko no longer grunted or shouted, either with effort or with anger, as he had when firebending in the past; now his movements were calm and deliberate, and the fire he produced was careful in its power.

Midday found the two former enemies meditating near the edge of the platform, soaking in the sun's rays. "Would you look at that?" Sokka whispered to Katara when they passed by. Katara had to admit how strange it was, seeing the two former enemies sit quietly next to each other.

_Maybe not so strange,_ she thought, before she could stop herself. She could count on one hand the number of times Zuko and Aang had helped each other; but this was the first time she could remember them doing something … normal, together. It was almost endearing.

She felt something in her chest, almost like a dull ache. She shook her head, reminding herself that she still had to be on her guard, especially for the sake of Aang's safety. After all, she and Zuko had also experienced moments of endearment, and it hadn't made any difference when the next battle came. And it always came, eventually.

* * *

><p>Sokka turned the idea over in his mind for days, before finally asking Zuko where Fire Nation prisoners might be found. He knew that the group's main focus had to be helping Aang take on the Fire Lord, but if there was any chance that they could free the invasion force … he owed it to them to get them out as soon as possible. Besides, he had promised his father that they wouldn't be apart for such a long time.<p>

He didn't want to tell the rest of the group about it, because he knew they would insist on being part of the mission—they all had loved ones who had been taken. But Zuko's description of the Boiling Rock made it clear to him that an obvious task force wouldn't be cut out for penetrating a prison. It would be easier if he went alone and somehow got inside the system—the same way they took out Azula's drill, and the same way Azula conquered Ba Sing Se. He would operate from the inside.

It was only reluctantly that he let Zuko come with him, after the firebender caught him trying to leave. He was right about the war balloon being more practical transportation than Appa. Zuko was smart, and knew more about the Fire Nation than Sokka did. He'd have to accept him as backup.

He started to almost regret it, even before they were halfway there.

Sokka could think of two separate factors that would make one-on-one time with Zuko awkward: the fact that Zuko was his sister's ex-boyfriend, and the fact that he had been their enemy until very recently. Either of those circumstances alone would have made it uncomfortable to be alone with Zuko; but with both of those factors present, the unease was almost as suffocating as the helium in the war balloon.

"Y'know, a friend of mine actually designed these war balloons," Sokka said, in an attempt at conversation.

Zuko turned to look at him. "No kidding?"

"Yep. Teo's dad, the Mechanist. We met them at the Northern Air Temple, and I helped improve the design for the war balloon. A balloon … but for war."

Zuko turned to stoke the fire. "If there's one thing my dad's good at, it's war."

"Yeah, it kind of seems to run in the family."

"Hey, not everyone in my family's like that," Zuko said defensively.

"I know, I know," Sokka amended quickly. "You've changed."

Zuko looked away. "I was talking about my uncle," he said quietly. "He was more of a father to me. And I really let him down." His voice was tinged with sadness and regret.

Sokka looked at him, his expression uncharacteristically serious. "I think your uncle would be proud of you," he said honestly. "Leaving your home to come help us … that's hard."

"It wasn't that hard," Zuko murmured. The hard part had been coming to the decision; carrying it out had seemed easy in comparison.

"Really? You didn't leave behind anyone you cared about?"

"Well … I did have a girlfriend, for a while." Zuko smiled. "Mai."

Sokka leaned forward, smirking incredulously. "The gloomy girl who sighs a lot?" The idea was amusing; and he felt somewhat relieved to learn that Zuko hadn't been dwelling on Katara.

"Yeah." Zuko looked off to the side, as though he were seeing something—or someone—else; then his smile faded.

"Did something happen with her?" Sokka asked cautiously.

"We broke up, not long after I came home. I guess … my heart wasn't really in it." Zuko shrugged. "I mean, I cared about her—and maybe I still do—but there was something missing." He shook his head, stopping himself from saying more. "Sorry. I don't mean to bore you."

"It's okay." Sokka leaned back on the basket again. "My first girlfriend turned into the moon."

"I know. I was there, remember?"

"Oh, right."

Zuko cast a sympathetic look at Sokka. "I'm sorry that happened."

"Thanks."

They were silent for a moment. Then Sokka spoke, sounding hesitant. "I know this is probably the last thing you want to talk to me about, but …"

Zuko cringed; he knew what was coming. He had actually been worried that Sokka would want to discuss this topic when Sokka asked to talk privately with Zuko the previous night.

"… since you're in our group now … and you broke up with Mai … are you hoping to get back together with Katara?" Sokka looked at Zuko with apprehension, but no trace of accusation or suspicion.

Zuko looked away, stoking the fire again. "I don't plan to, and I don't think it's very likely."

"How come?"

Zuko tried to find the right way to put it. "For one thing, we've both changed a lot since we first met. It's like we're completely different people. For another, well, Katara doesn't trust me."

"But she let you join the group, and you're teaching Aang firebending, and she let you go on a field trip with him."

Zuko hesitated, and then confessed, "She said she would kill me if I made any indication that I would hurt Aang."

Sokka's eyes widened in shock and disbelief. "No way. Katara said that? To you?"

"Not in so many words. She didn't actually say the word 'kill' – she said she would make sure I found my destiny, permanently."

Sokka slumped back in his seat. "Wow. I can't believe she'd do that—it seems so unlike her. I mean, she can be aggressive sometimes, but I find it hard to believe she'd be willing to kill someone." _Especially someone she used to care so much about …_

Zuko still didn't look at Sokka; but now seemed like a good time to voice his confusion. "I get that she would be suspicious of me, given everything I've done to you guys, or even resent me, after what I did to her; but … I think it's more than that. I can't figure it out."

"The thing about Katara," Sokka said, rubbing the back of his neck, "is that she trusts people easily. But if you betray her trust, then she can hold a grudge."

"Has she said anything about me? Recently, I mean?"

Sokka hesitated. "She said that she thought you were really confused. She thought you had changed. But the time came for you to make a choice … and you chose to turn against her. That really hurt."

Zuko bowed his head, looking ashamed.

"I'm not blaming you," Sokka said quickly. "I'm just saying that's how she sees it. That's why she's mad at you, and so suspicious of you now—because every time she starts to trust you, she ends up regretting it. She doesn't want that to happen again."

Zuko wondered if there was any way he could make it up to Katara personally, besides simply helping their cause in the war. He decided, then and there, that when they got back—assuming, of course, that they survived this mission—he would find a way to make amends with her. But now he looked back at Sokka. "Why are you asking me about her?"

Sokka held up his hands. "Just curious. You didn't have to answer—your personal life is none of my business."

"But Katara's is?" Zuko guessed.

"She's my little sister. When our dad left to fight in the war, the last thing he told me was to take care of her." Sokka looked off to the side. "Though, to tell the truth, she took care of me just as much."

"You're lucky. I can't remember a time when Azula and I were like that." Actually, the only time they worked together was when they conquered Ba Sing Se. His return to the Fire Nation had been when they spent the most time together. That was as mutual as they had ever been, and even then they'd been merely coexisting.

"Is she older or younger than you?" Sokka asked.

"Younger. She's fourteen." The look of shock on Sokka's face almost made Zuko laugh. "I know, it's hard to believe." He blew some fire into the furnace again. "I forget sometimes that she's younger. Somehow, I never really thought of myself as the 'big' brother. Azula acts older than her age, and she's always been the better firebender. She never really needed me to look out for her."

Sokka looked at Zuko with something that might have been sympathy, or perhaps just understanding. He realized that his own relationship with his sister was something special: no matter how much they argued or disagreed, they always had each other's backs.

* * *

><p>"Okay, when I joked about you jumping into a volcano, I didn't think you or I would actually end up doing it."<p>

"We didn't jump, we crash-landed. Remember that this was _your_ idea."

Sokka actually smiled as he sorted through the uniforms. "Remember when Aang and I broke onto your ship to rescue Katara? I actually wanted to try Fire Nation disguises. Guess I got my wish."

"Lucky you."

Sokka stopped short, marveling that Prince Zuko had just used sarcasm. Then they quickly changed into their prison guard uniforms.

It was surprisingly easy for them to blend in with the multitude of guards overseeing the even greater multitude of prisoners. No one asked them for identification, or even what they were supposed to be doing. They were given commands whenever and wherever they were needed; other than that, they were able to travel freely around the facility.

While Sokka helped an older guard put an allegedly troublemaking prisoner in "the Cooler," Zuko—who made a mental note to ask what the cooler was—asked around about the prisoners. When he met Sokka and hour later, he was able to report that there were no Water Tribe warriors at the Boiling Rock.

"So we came all this way for nothing," Sokka despaired. "I failed. Again."

Zuko felt some sincere sympathy for him. He'd felt failure often enough in his life. But he'd always had Iroh to encourage him when he came close to despair. He attempted to make up a proverb, before realizing he should have simply stuck to one that already existed, "Every cloud has a silver lining."

He was relieved when Sokka seemed to brighten up, joining him at the metal railing. "Maybe we haven't failed after all."

"That's the spirit." Zuko smiled, wondering at how he had become such an optimist. "I can't believe that worked. I didn't even know what I was saying."

"No, what you said made no sense at all," Sokka said seriously. "But look!" He pointed down to the prison yard, where dozens of convicts were standing or sitting around. "It's Suki!"

Zuko tried to see who he was pointing at. There was a girl sitting on a rock, the only person in the yard who was by herself instead of in a group of two or three.

A bell sounded, and a guard shouted for the prisoners to return to their individual cells. Sokka, still smiling euphorically, lowered his visor and rushed back inside. Zuko followed, trying to get some details. "Who's Suki?"

"My girlfriend!" Sokka lowered his voice, though his excitement was still audible. "Azula hinted that she'd been captured. I can't believe I didn't think to look for her here!"

Zuko grinned. "My uncle once told me, 'The only thing better than finding what you're looking for, is finding something you weren't looking for.'"

Sokka looked thoughtful, but no less overjoyed. "Huh. I guess that makes sense. We didn't find my dad, but we found my girlfriend."

They had to break into an office of records in order to find out where Suki's cell was located. Then Sokka went in to talk with her while Zuko kept watch outside.

Zuko only realized how little thought they'd put into this measure was when a female guard came up, saying she needed to go inside. All he could do to warn them was knock on the metal door and make a lame excuse for her not to go in. When she tried to push past him, he tackled her. He managed to get her eyes off the cell door long enough for Sokka to emerge; but then she called out to him, demanding help, knowing that Zuko was an impostor. In a matter of seconds, Sokka had to choose between defending his ally and protecting his cover.

He chose the latter.

Zuko wondered whether Sokka got any satisfaction out of taking him prisoner. If he did, he was smart enough not to show it. He whispered to Zuko, "Don't worry, I'll figure something out.

Zuko realized he was going to have to trust Sokka to get him out, just as much as Sokka needed to trust him not to blow his cover.

* * *

><p>The situation got more complicated from then on.<p>

The Warden came to see Zuko, to warn him—or threaten him, judging by his tone—that he would be better off keeping his identity as the Prince a secret from the other prisoners. Now they had a time limit: they had to break out before the Warden sent Zuko to the Capital City in chains, or whatever it was the Fire Lord decided should be his fate.

Then, another prisoner—Chit Sang by name—overheard Sokka telling Suki and Zuko about his plan for their escape. Sokka reluctantly agreed to let him help, if only to avoid having Chit Sang turn them in.

The plan worked smoothly enough: Chit Sang got into a pretend fight with Zuko, who was sent to the Cooler cell and managed to unbolt the freezer compartment from the room. But then, just when Sokka arrived to free him, they heard the other guards discussing new inmates who would be arriving the following morning, including some war prisoners.

It was Zuko who voiced what they were both thinking. "That could mean your father."

"I know." Rather than looking happy, Sokka seemed almost anguished.

"Well, what should we do?" Zuko looked to the younger boy for a decision; it was really his mission, after all. "Are we going ahead with the plan, or are we waiting another night?"

Sokka shook his head. "I don't know." He looked to Zuko, his voice almost cracking as he whispered. "Is it right for me to risk Suki's freedom—all of our freedom—on the slim chance that my dad might show up?"

"It's your call, Sokka."

That didn't do anything to reassure him. Zuko could empathize; he knew what it was like to struggle with a decision, not knowing what was right, what the outcome of each would be. In a way, this was Sokka's own crossroads of destiny, for himself and for the people he was trying to save.

In the end, he chose to risk staying, and Suki and Zuko, in a show of true loyalty, both insisted on staying with him. Unfortunately they lost their means of escape, when Chit Sang and two other prisoners took the Cooler boat. When it was found missing, the security would be tightened, and they wouldn't be able to use another Cooler again.

"We gave up our only chance of escaping," Sokka said, sounding mournful in spite of his decision. "I hope we haven't just made a huge mistake."

* * *

><p>It was dawn when Chit Sang blew his own cover, screaming when he inadvertently burned himself from the boiling lakewater. From their hiding place against a lower wall, the three teenagers could hear the Warden shouting orders for a lockdown. That would only make it harder for them to finally escape.<p>

They could also see the gondola moving toward the docking tower, with an unknown number of new prisoners inside. They watched as they emerged, one by one. Sokka didn't recognize any of them. Until one of the guards prodded one last man out of the gondola.

"Dad."

Suki and Zuko exchanged smiles, both of them glad for Sokka's sake.

"We've got to move quickly," Sokka said. He managed to get Suki and Zuko back in their respective cells before going back to see the lineup. "I'll meet you guys later," he promised each of them. There was nothing left for them to do but wait.

Sokka made good on his promise, though. Before midday, he came back to Zuko's cell. "Zuko, are you there?"

"I'm here."

"I just finished talking to my dad. We came up with an escape plan together."

"What are you doing here?" The demand came from another guard, accompanied by a female, probably the same one Zuko had been arrested for attacking.

Sokka was much better at coming up with an alibi than Zuko had been. "I was just telling this dirty lowlife what I think of him!"

"Well, you'll have to do that later. He's coming with us."

Zuko was slightly startled, hearing this. Was he already being sent away? Would he be kept from rejoining Sokka and the others?

"Why?" he heard Sokka ask.

"Because we have orders straight from the Warden, that's why," the female guard said.

Sokka's voice was hopeful, in a sort of innocently mischievous way. "Could I just get ten more seconds to rough him up a bit?"

Her answer was annoyed but lenient. "Fine, ten seconds."

Sokka slipped into the cell, closing the door behind him. Zuko smirked at how well that improvisation had worked. He quickly rolled up his mattress so Sokka had something to punch, so it would sound like they were fighting. He grunted loudly to mask Sokka's whispered message. "We have a new plan, but it's gonna need a big distraction. Be in the yard in one hour."

That was all he had time to say before the other guards came in, and Sokka had an excuse to choke Zuko. (He had to wonder if Sokka had wanted to do that in the past, or got any satisfaction from it now.)

He started getting worried as the guards led him through the halls of the prison. What did the Warden want with him now? Were they going to send him back to the Capital? Would they torture him, and try to make him reveal their escape plan, or Aang's location? The fact that they didn't answer his shouted questions did nothing to ease his fears.

They took him to another cell, exactly like the one he'd just been in, except this one had a chair in the middle of the room. Zuko landed on it when the guards pushed him in. He turned around to look at them. "I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Come on, Zuko. We all know that's a lie."

Mai was standing in the corner to the right of the doorway. Her red clothes almost camouflaged with the red metal walls.

"Mai." Zuko was more surprised than anything else. He rose up enough to sit on the chair. He didn't quite meet her eyes. "How did you know I was here?"

"The Warden's my uncle, you idiot."

Zuko groaned, wiping his hand across his face. "You're lucky I got to you before Azula did," Mai informed him.

Zuko looked up sharply. "Azula. Is she coming?"

"If she hasn't gotten here already."

Zuko groaned, pressing a hand over his face. That would make the next breakout a hundred times more complicated and dangerous. He didn't even know what the plan was, and Sokka had no way of knowing that Azula and her friends were coming.

The guards who had escorted him were still outside the cell, but they left the door open. He could make a break for it if he needed to, but Mai and the guards surely wouldn't let him get far. Hopefully Sokka's plan would work, whatever it was …

"Why did you come here?"

"Just to make sure you know what you're doing. I have to ask, Zuko: What were you _thinking_?"

"You mean about coming here? I can't tell you—"

"I mean about running away. Your father named you a traitor. They say you've actually joined the Avatar!"

"It's true." Zuko hesitated. "I wanted to say good-bye, but I couldn't do anything that might implicate you."

"_Thanks_, Zuko. I appreciate your consideration." There was a new harshness to Mai's sarcasm. He hadn't seen her this angry since their argument on Ember Island.

There was a moment of silence, before Mai realized he wasn't going to speak without her prompting. "Why are you doing this?"

Zuko held his hands our plaintively. "I have to do this, to save my country."

"Save it? You're betraying it."

"That's not how I see it."

Mai folded her arms, turning away sulkily. Zuko sighed.

"I can't go back, Mai." She looked at him again. "I can't go back to how things were—or how they would have been if I hadn't gotten myself banished. I can't just stand by while our nation is hurting others—not when it's in my power to stop it."

Mai was looking at him like she'd never seen him clearly before. "Who or what are you really fighting for?"

"The _world_, including the Fire Nation." He knew it sounded like a paradox to her; the war had always been between the Fire Nation and the rest of the world. "I want to end this war and help anyone who's been hurt by it. Azula and my father want to end it by hurting more people and taking control of everything. Can you see why I'd choose the Avatar over them?"

Mai didn't respond right away; but when she did, it wasn't with an answer. "You asked me once if I believed in this war. I still can't answer that. But I do know—and you should know—that I never wanted to fight you."

The corners of Zuko's mouth turned ever-so-slightly upwards. "Then you know how I felt about Katara, the whole time we were enemies."

"And you know what it's like not to have a choice."

"You _do_ have a choice, Mai. We all do. It was only recently that I realized it." He paused, then looked at her with calm, resigned eyes. "But if you choose to help Azula … I won't hold it against you."

Mai stared at him, her expression softening as the hostility left. It was a strange moment: she looked lost, and he looked sympathetic for her sake.

The moment ended when a frantic guard appeared in the doorway. "Ma'am, there's a riot going on. I'm here to protect you."

_A riot_. Zuko realized that was most likely part of Sokka's plan. He'd have to go through that riot to find the others in the yard.

"I don't need any protection," Mai said flatly.

Zuko laughed a little. "Believe me, she doesn't."

The guard started apologizing to Mai, and Zuko took his chance; he firebent at the guard's feet and ran across the room. He heard Mai shout as the guard tried unnecessarily to shield her. Zuko shut the door and locked it from the outside just as she reached the threshold. As he ran, he could hear Mai pounding on the metal. It would take a while for them to get out.

Zuko now knew the way well enough that he could run the route outside. He found the rioting prisoners in the courtyard, and had to weave through them to find his friends. Sokka, Suki, Chit Sang, and the man Zuko knew must be Sokka's father were already gathered together.

"I just saw Mai. My sister's here. We have to get out _now_."

"Okay." Sokka pointed to an upper level of the tower, where they could see some guards looking down on the scene. "All we need to do is grab the Warden and get to the gondolas."

"And how do we do that?" Zuko asked.

Sokka looked from the tower to Zuko, his expression quizzical. "I'm not sure."

That was all Suki needed to hear before she sprang into action. She saw one man who was sprawled on his hands and knees; before he rose, she stepped onto his back to get a step up, then jumped onto the next closest stranger's head. She was glad to find that she was still nimble on her feet. In mere minutes—the amount of time it took for the guys to catch up via the stairs—she had scaled the balconies, evaded the firebending guards, and managed to get the Warden in a handhold.

The group made their way to the gondola dock on the top floor. The firebenders tried to get in their way, but Zuko dissipated their fire and informed them of their hostage. "Back off. We've got the Warden."

Not knowing what else to do, the guards lowered their arms and stood down. It was a tense moment, moving between the two lines of people who wanted nothing more than to attack them. But they made it all the way to the gondola. Once everyone else was in, Zuko pushed down the lever to make it move. But even as it left the dock, he stayed behind long enough to break the lever with a few kicks.

The guards were starting to fire on him when he finally ran to the edge of the dock. Strangely, he felt like this had happened before, only he'd had a different point of view.

_Katara got a running start, her feet pounding on the metal. Then she jumped off the edge, reaching, reaching—_

This time it was Zuko who jumped, flailing in the air for a moment, before Sokka caught his wrist. Somehow the scrawnier Water Tribe boy held on as Zuko swung forward beside the gondola; then he helped him climb up through the window.

"We're on our way," Suki said, calmly triumphant.

But Hakoda was still looking out the window back at the tower. "Wait. Who's that?"

The others looked, and the three teenagers recognized the newcomers: Ty Lee and Princess Azula had joined the guards on the tower.

"That's trouble," Zuko informed Hakoda and Chit Sang. "It's my sister and her friend." As they watched, Ty Lee leapt onto the gondola line, running across it like a tightrope, while Azula utilized a pair of handcuffs to go down it like a zip line, propelling herself forward with firebending.

"This is a rematch I've been waiting for," Suki said readily.

"Me too," Zuko said. It had been months since he'd last fought Azula, back in Ba Sing Se. She hadn't even fought fair, then. This time would be different.

The three teenagers climbed through the windows onto the gondola roof. When the Fire Nation girls landed, Azula faced the boys on one end while Ty Lee faced Suki on the other.

It felt much like the first time they'd teamed up, except that this time they actually worked together: Sokka attacked with his sword, and Zuko defended by dissipating her Azula's fire. They took turns and looked out for each other.

At one point Sokka was forced to the side to avoid a blue fire blast. For a minute it was just the brother and sister fighting one-on-one. Azula was so absorbed in pushing Zuko to the edge of the roof, she didn't see Sokka coming, until his sword hit her armor. "Stay away from my sister's ex-boyfriend!" he said between hits. She blocked every one, and then pushed him back, so hard that he started to fall backwards. Zuko only just managed to catch his arm.

Even when he had steadied himself, Sokka looked pale. "I cannot believe I just said that," he muttered.

"Much appreciated," Zuko said shortly, before turning back to fight.

* * *

><p>It was a while before someone passed by the cell that Mai and the guard were locked in, and managed to unlock it. "Something's going on," Mai said, heading for the stairs to the exit. She didn't bother waiting for the guards.<p>

Outside, she saw the riot still going on in the yard. But she didn't see Azula or Ty Lee or her uncle in the chaos. She decided to go up to the dock where the gondola had dropped her off earlier.

She was at the railing outside the second-topmost floor when she glimpsed the real battle, happening on the gondola, over the boiling lake. She could see Ty Lee's pink costume, the shine of Azula's armor, and the blue and red flames from both of the royal siblings.

She also saw and heard her uncle when he leaned out the window and shouted, "CUT THE LINE!"

Mai's mind raced almost as fast as her legs as she ran up the last flight of stairs to the docking station.

Zuko's words echoed in her head. _"She can think for herself. She doesn't blindly follow orders or do what's expected of her; she thinks about what she has to do, and what she wants to do. Meanwhile you just do whatever Azula tells you."_

She didn't want Zuko to remember her like that. Even if she never saw him again, she wanted him to think well of her, not curse her memory for helping to destroy him. And even if they couldn't be together … she didn't think she could live with herself if she helped kill him, or allowed her friend to kill him.

From behind the shed, Mai saw that Azula and Ty Lee were coming back on a returning gondola, while the guards sawed through the now-halted line connected to the other.

Within seconds, she had pinned their wrists to the shed structure.

"What are you doing?" one of them exclaimed. They knew she was the Warden's niece. Why was she stopping them from stopping the escapees?

"Helping a friend," Mai said flatly.

Other guards came, some of them even daring to firebend at her; but even after months of inactivity, she was still agile and had flawless aim. She allowed herself one small, brief smile, because she was glad she'd brought her usual number of stilettos, and it felt strangely satisfying to do the exact opposite of what was expected of her, just once.

She took out all the guards at the docking station, long enough for her to kick away the crowbar that they had used to stop the pulley. She only stopped fighting when she saw that Zuko's gondola had made it to the other side, and Azula and Ty Lee reached the docking station. More guards came, and Mai didn't resist her arrest. She knew she had just committed treason; but even more importantly, she had directly foiled Azula's mission. That was personal.

Azula ordered the guards to leave them. It was just the three of them—Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee. They had been teammates for months, and friends for years. And Mai had just thrown all of that away.

"I never expected this from you," Azula said. Her voice was low, and dangerously calm. Mai didn't meet her eyes, but Azula could see the defiance in her expression. There was no fear, though, unlike most people whom Azula faced. Ty Lee, on the other hand, looked scared enough for the three of them, not understanding what Mai had done or knowing what Azula was going to do.

"The thing I don't understand is _why_," Azula said, her voice shaking with the fury she was holding back. "Why would you do it? You know the consequences.

"I did it to save my uncle … and Zuko."

"You're just as much of an idiot as him," Azula spat. "What did he ever do for you?"

"You wouldn't understand," Mai said bitterly, looking away. She couldn't tell Azula that Zuko had taught her something about loyalty, about friendship, when she had just thrown away any that she felt for Azula. The fact was, Zuko had been a better friend to her than Azula.

"Don't tell me you're still in love with him," Azula snarled.

"He's not my boyfriend," Mai confirmed. "But he _is_ my friend."

Azula's mouth dropped open at this. Her eyes flashed with anger and something else, something almost … hurt. "And what about me? What am I to you?"

Mai finally looked her in the eye. "You're my Princess." That was the safest answer, because it was true, and ultimately, it was what Azula wanted to be to her.

"Not if you side with the enemy."

"I guess we both miscalculated," Mai said. "I never planned any of this. When you asked me to help in your mission, you said we would be tracking your brother and uncle. I figured you meant, 'with intent of capture.' And I was okay with that. But if you threaten the life of someone I care about … that matters more to me than my fear of you."

"Then _you_ miscalculated," Azula burst out, no longer bothering to hide her anger. "You should have feared me more!"

Ty Lee's eyes, which had been turning nervously between the two girls, widened to their full capacity when she saw each of them get into a stance. Azula moved first, extending her fingers in the way that would produce lightning; Mai then brought up her last stiletto, ready and willing to defend herself. She wasn't going down without a fight.

Ty Lee had seen her friends fight in battle before, but they had never fought each other. She couldn't let them do that now—one of them would kill the other. And she knew Azula was the one more likely to aim for the kill.

That's why as Azula moved to strike, Ty Lee jabbed her in very select places on her arms and back, blocking her chi and throwing her off balance. The princess seemed to fall in slow motion, and they could hear her horrified gasp as she realized that her two closest allies—the only people in the world she had ever trusted completely—had both betrayed her.

Ty Lee looked just as stunned as the others by her actions, but she was quicker to come to her senses. "Come on, let's get out of here!" But the guards who had been watching from a distance were already running up and surrounding them. Ty Lee followed Mai's example, and didn't try to fight.

Azula glared at them from where she lay flat on her stomach. "You're both fools."

Two guards helped her to stand. "What shall we do with them, Princess?"

"Put them somewhere I'll never have to see their faces again," Azula snarled. "And let them rot."

That was when the girls realized something: Azula had never wanted their friendship, only their loyalty—to the Fire Nation, and to her. Any kind conversations or shared adventures meant nothing to her.

The guards led the two new prisoners to the facilities below. Mai looked at Ty Lee from the corner of her eye. "You didn't need to do that," she said quietly.

"Yes I did," Ty Lee answered. "You're my friend, too."

In spite of everything, Mai smiled. She may have just lost her freedom, but she had saved Zuko, and their friendship. And unlike Azula, she wasn't alone.

* * *

><p>It wasn't until they were already on their way back that Sokka finally thought to make introductions. "So … does everybody know everyone else here?" It was strange, since they'd already worked together with mutual dependence, even before everyone knew each other's names and relationships.<p>

"Everyone, this is my dad, Hakoda of the Water Tribe. Dad, this is Suki, leader of the Kyoshi Warriors." Suki smiled and bowed. "This is Chit Sang." Their newest acquaintance waved in lieu of a greeting. "And this is Prince Zuko."

Zuko was surprised but pleased by the proud tone in Sokka's voice when he introduced him. He remembered to bow politely to the chief. Hakoda blinked, noting the strangeness of having the Fire Prince bow to him, but then smiled and bowed back.

"So where are we headed?" Chit Sang asked.

"Our current hideout," Sokka answered. "By the way, Zuko and I are traveling with the Avatar and some other fugitives." Chit Sang looked impressed.

While Zuko steered the zeppelin, Sokka filled the others in on what had happened since the failed invasion. Suki was eager to hear about her friends from Hakoda, who assured her they were relatively all right, despite being imprisoned. Then Sokka took it upon himself to tell Hakoda about how he and Suki had met, first on Kyoshi Island, and again on their journey to Ba Sing Se.

It was after dark when they made it back to the Western Air Temple. Sokka half-expected the others to be asleep, but Aang, Katara, and Toph were awake and came to meet them. As they'd planned, only Sokka and Zuko came out at first.

"What are you doing in this thing?" Katara demanded. The Fire Nation zeppelin had caught them all off guard. "What happened to the war balloon?"

"It kind of got destroyed," Zuko answered casually.

"Sounds like a crazy fishing trip," Aang remarked.

"Did you at least get some good meat?" Toph asked hopefully.

"I did," Sokka said proudly. "The best meat of all. The meat of friendship and fatherhood."

The three other escapees took that as their cue to come out. They recognized Hakoda and Suki; Chit Sang waved. "I'm new. What's up everybody?"

Katara was shocked, and actually teared up. "Dad."

Hakoda smiled. "Hi, Katara." He caught her in a hug when she ran up to him.

"How are you here? What is going on?" She looked to her brother. "Where did you go?"

"We … kind of went to a Fire Nation prison," Sokka confessed. Zuko smiled as he watched Katara pull Sokka into a group hug. He was glad to have helped reunite this family.

* * *

><p>Because it was so late when they arrived, and they knew the Earth Kingdom refugees would also want to hear the news, they waited until the following morning before sharing the full story. Hakoda told Haru, Teo, and The Duke about their family and friends, who were still imprisoned in the Fire Nation capital city. Zuko and Sokka tried to take it in turns to describe the escape, though Chit Sang also filled them in on his part. Aang, Katara and Toph were expectedly shocked when Zuko described what Mai had done.<p>

"It was amazing," Zuko said. There was no mistaking the admiration and gratitude in his voice. "She saved us."

"Well … that was … nice of her," Aang offered.

"That's an understatement, if she had to face Azula afterwards," Toph pointed out.

"She'll probably go to prison herself," Zuko acknowledged, looking down sadly. When he looked up again, he seemed more determined. "When the war's over, we have to make sure she's freed. I owe her that much."

Katara's expression was unreadable. Zuko wondered what she must think of Mai, whether she was jealous or grateful or indifferent. No, she couldn't be indifferent, because Mai had saved her father and brother.

"You could have asked me to come," Katara said after a pause. "I could have used waterbending to get through the lake."

Sokka shook his head. "Then we all would have been burned, or boiled alive. And if you tried to make ice, it would just melt in the hot springs." Katara said no more.

While the others split up to do different things around the temple, the Water Tribe family stayed in the fountain area to talk. They had a lot of catching up to do.

"There is something I wanted to ask you two about," Hakoda said. "During the fight on the gondola, I heard Sokka say something about Zuko being 'my sister's ex-boyfriend'."

Katara's mouth dropped open; then she looked at Sokka, narrowing her eyes. "You didn't."

Sokka held up his hands in defense. "Azula was attacking Zuko; I thought I should say something that would throw her off guard."

Katara still just looked at him. "Sokka," she said, "Azula already knew about Zuko and me. She mentioned it when she captured me in Ba Sing Se."

Sokka blinked at her. "Oh," he said, feeling sheepish. What Azula must have thought of him now …

"Is there anything you want to tell me about?" Hakoda asked. He looked more curious than suspicious.

"No," Katara said firmly. Hakoda looked at her skeptically. Katara huffed. "I wasn't going to tell you about this," she said crossly. "It shouldn't matter, because we don't have anything anymore."

"But you did?"

Katara looked away. "It was a while ago, before he even switched sides …"

"Why don't you guys go for a walk? I'll just be here … catching up with Suki …" Sokka pointed sideways with both hands, and scooted away. Katara sighed.

Father and daughter walked to the grassy area above the cliffside. Now that they were away from the others, Katara finally told Hakoda everything.

Even though she was loathe to trace her history with Zuko, some part of her felt glad that she was able to talk to Hakoda. It was something like a weight off her chest, telling the story in its entirety. It was actually quite a tale. And it was relevant, since Zuko was working with them; Hakoda needed to know why he could, and could not, be trusted.

Katara tried to be fair in the telling. She recounted how Zuko had helped her, to justify why she'd had feelings for him; but she recounted how he had hurt her, to explain why she was still wary of him now.

She also told him about Iroh, and what he had done for her and for the team. Hakoda finally understood why Katara had wanted to free Iroh on the Day of Black Sun. "For all his notoriety as a general, he sounds like a good man."

"He is," Katara agreed. "And I think that's what caused Zuko to use his conscience, on the times when he tried to help us. But even after everything Iroh did for him, and everything that we went through, he still turned against us. Then just after the invasion, he followed us here and asked if he could join our group and teach Aang firebending. We argued about it, but in the end Aang decided to accept Zuko."

"What did the rest of you think?"

"I only agreed because we're not going to find another person willing to teach him firebending."

They walked in silence for a minute. "What are you thinking?" Katara asked.

"I think you've been very smart, all things considered." Katara smiled, pleased to hear this. "But I'll say this for Zuko," Hakoda said. "I haven't known him as long as you, but he saved me at the Boiling Rock. I owe him my freedom and my life—and apparently you do too. He seems to be going quite out of his way to prove himself."

"What are you saying?" Katara exclaimed. "That I should just let my guard down and pretend nothing bad ever happened between us?"

"No. But he keeps showing that he's changed. I think you should give him a chance."

"I _have_ been, probably more than I should. He's living with us, and I let him go off with Aang alone."

"That's not quite what I meant. … Can I ask you something? Are you still in love with him?"

"No!" Wasn't that obvious? She felt nothing for him, except bitterness and bouts of anger. Nevertheless, she felt her cheeks flush. "Why, do you think I should be?"

"Of course not. But sometimes indifference can cause more pain than outright hatred. It can hurt him _and_ you."

They were both silent after this statement. "You're talking about me and you, too," Katara said. They both remembered how cold she had been to Hakoda after their initial reunion. "I'm sorry about that," she said softly.

"It's all right."

They had circled back to the temple complex now. Katara wanted to finish this conversation before they rejoined the others. "So … what do you think I should do?"

"You could try to be friends," Hakoda suggested.

Katara laughed a little, without really feeling humor. "I just told you all the times when I tried to be."

Hakoda put a hand on her shoulder. Katara looked up at him, the way she used to as a little girl looking for guidance. "Keep trying, especially if he does the same."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I thought about having another scene at the end, with Zuko and Katara arguing or even dueling (echoing their first duel), but I couldn't figure out how to include that as well as the conflict in the next chapter. I must ask you for your patience, because I know how badly you'll want the next part of the story, but my free time is dwindling now that I've started college classes and work. Also, I posted a new _Legend of Korra_ story, and I might write more for it once the new season starts.

Artwork for this chapter: "Contemplation" by arch-nsha on DeviantArt


	42. Choosing Battles

_Published November 10, 2013_

"Choosing Battles"

It seemed that in this world we were piling up hurt upon hurt, and hate upon hate, and then hurt upon hurt again. Forgiveness. We couldn't forgive. We could only hate when we were hurt. And then the hurt and the hate would start up again – all in a terrible cycle. ~ Susan Fletcher, _Shadow Spinner_

* * *

><p>Katara knew their respite was too good to last. They had stayed at the Western Air Temple longer than they had ever dared to stay in one place. Their solace was finally disturbed early one morning, when they were trying to sleep in. It had become their habit here, because the days were so long with so little to do. They should have been more on their guard, especially after the escape from the Boiling Rock, where five of them had encountered Azula herself.<p>

They woke to the sound of bombs going off. Fire Nation airships, just like the one that the escapees had stolen, rose up in view of the cliffside, throwing more explosives toward the temple. Aang had woken up first and was quick enough to airbend the shutter doors shut, but the bombs hitting the temple outside still shook the ancient structure. Chunks of stone started falling from the ceiling.

"Watch out!" Katara had only just looked up at the ceiling when Zuko threw himself at her, pushing her out of the way and falling on top of her in the process. Katara landed on her stomach, and Zuko fell on top of her, just as the huge stones fell on the spot where she had been standing.

"What are you doing?" Katara demanded. Her heart was pounding, not just from fear and adrenaline, but also from the close contact with Zuko. It was the first time he'd touched her since he came to their group. Yet it wasn't the first time he had tried to shield her with his body.

"Keeping rocks from crushing you," Zuko replied, completely serious.

"Well, I'm not crushed, so you can get off me," Katara snapped, pushing Zuko off her and standing up.

Zuko lay there a moment, watching her walk away. "I'll take that as a thank-you," he said.

Katara pretended she hadn't heard him. She wasn't going to feel grateful, or ashamed of being ungrateful. Mostly she felt annoyed. Why did he have to be the one to save her just now? Katara hated being continually in his debt. That made it impossible to form a clear opinion of him.

Toph and Haru quickly earthbent a tunnel leading deeper into the cliffside. "Come on, we can get out through here!" Toph summoned.

Everyone headed toward the tunnel, except for Aang, who tried to pull Appa over by the reins, and Zuko, who remained standing where he was. "What are you doing?" Aang called out to him.

"Go ahead," Zuko said, looking at him over his shoulder. "I'll hold them off." He turned toward the enemy airships, his voice turning dark. "I think this is a family visit."

"Zuko, no!" Aang protested, but Sokka and Katara came up to him.

"Come on, we gotta get out of here!" Sokka urged him. The three of them tried to coax Appa toward the tunnel, even as Zuko fought and the outer part of the temple gave way.

As she pulled on Appa's reins, Katara couldn't help looking beyond at the wreckage through which Zuko had disappeared, until Toph put up a wall of stone to shield the group. How could he face such an attack so fearlessly? Maybe he felt confident enough because he thought they wouldn't attack.

She was so busy wondering that she almost didn't notice how stubborn Appa was being, refusing to go through the escape route. "I can't get him to go in there," Aang said finally. "Appa hates tunnels." He had been that way ever since getting lost in the Cave of Two Lovers.

"Aang, there's no way we can fly out of here," Katara said.

"We'll have to find a way."

"We need to split up." Sokka turned back to Hakoda at the head of the group. "Take the tunnel and get to the stolen airship."

Katara knew what he was getting at. Team Avatar would stick together, to train Aang and plan out their final battle, but their other friends and allies would look for their own way. "No." Katara came up to her father and brother. "The Fire Nation can't separate our family again."

She was starting to display the cohesive nature of water: it clings to other water droplets, not wanting to be alone. But it was understandable. First the Fire Nation killed her mother; then her father left to fight in the war; she had left her grandmother to help Aang; and each time she was reunited with her father, they were forced to separate again.

Hakoda put his hands on her shoulders. "It'll be okay." His eyes and tone were intense, a promise. "It's not forever."

They didn't have time to argue. Katara looked down, her expression hard enough to hide her disappointment. Then she hugged Hakoda quickly, before turning away to follow Aang. Sokka hesitated long enough to hug his father good-bye; then, wordlessly acting on an impulse, he took Suki's hand and pulled her along toward Appa. He knew the other fugitives would need Hakoda's leadership, while Suki would be more helpful to Team Avatar than to the others. At least that was the rationale he would give them later.

As their company left, Toph felt the wall of stone that she had set up to shield them. "I can clear that away and we can fly out through there," she said as she climbed onto Appa.

"Um, there's an awful lot of fire in that general direction," Suki said, calm despite her concern.

"We'll make it through," Aang said determinedly, taking the reins. "Let's go."

Toph collapsed the outer dome she had set up, but kept a stone shield intact in front of Appa as he took off. They managed to fly up and over the lead airship, but then someone—Azula, judging by the blue flames—blasted enough fire at the shield to break up the large stones.

When Katara, Sokka, and Suki looked behind them, they saw Azula standing on the top of an airship, and another one rising up with Zuko standing on its roof. The two siblings started to duel, but Katara couldn't watch; she had to waterbend and deflect the fireballs that were shot at them. Toph held on tightly to the saddle as Aang guided Appa to avoid the projectiles.

On the lead airship, the blue and red fire met, and seemed to explode like one of Azula's own bombs. A moment later, the two Fire Nation siblings could be seen freefalling on either side of the airship.

"Zuko!" Aang steered Appa down and around, doubling back and diving toward Zuko until they passed underneath him.

It was Katara who caught Zuko's hands and pulled him into the saddle. There were no emotions shown, no words exchanged; they were working together out of necessity. _There, now we're even for today,_ Katara thought.

When they looked back, Azula was still falling. "She's not going to make it," Zuko realized. He wasn't sorry—there was no love lost between Zuko and Azula—but it seemed unreal that such a powerful, dangerous person could all of a sudden be defeated. And if she didn't make it, he would be responsible for killing his sister. What would that say about him?

Then Azula let out a blast of fire from her feet, propelling herself towards the cliffs opposite the temple. Incredibly, she used her hairpiece—the symbol of her royal status—to dig into the cliffside, ending her fall by giving her something to hold on to.

"Of course she did," Zuko said bitterly. It was just typical of Azula—no, of both siblings, really. They always found a way to survive, to come back, to fight harder.

She had separated the allies, but they had survived. Still, they left knowing that they couldn't hide forever, and that Azula would be waiting for them the next time they had to face her.

* * *

><p>They spent the entire day flying, once again trying to put as much distance behind them as possible. For the first time in months, Zuko and the longer-standing members of Team Avatar remembered what it was like to be hunted.<p>

It wasn't until evening was settling that they picked out an island where they could stop and set up a camp. They erected four tents for Sokka, Katara, Zuko, and Suki. Aang and Toph would stick to sleeping on Appa and in an earth tent, respectively.

Zuko set up his tent fairly quickly. When he was finished, Katara was still in the process of constructing hers. Zuko walked up behind her. "Do you want some help with that?" he offered.

"I'm fine," she said flatly, and then reminded him, "I've done this more times than you."

Zuko looked at her a moment longer, before turning and walking away. It was only then that Katara chanced to look at him. He had acted heroic and unbelievably calm earlier that day, and was even acting helpful now; but Azula's ambush had only increased her reasons to be suspicious of him.

The way he'd stayed behind, supposedly to hold off the attackers … that could mean either of two things: that he was selflessly trying to help the group, or that he had a reason for being confident in approaching the airships. For all they knew, he might have been expecting them, and known that they wouldn't aim to kill him.

Her theories made sense clinically, in her mind, but when she looked at him talking to her friends and going about his business … he acted so normal, so mutual, that she wanted to believe he was being genuine. But if he was pretending, he was all the worse for it.

Zuko had already started a fire when she told the group to gather for dinner. They had taken half of the rations that they'd found on the stolen airship, so she sorted out portions for each of them.

"Wow, camping," Aang observed. "It really feels like old times again, doesn't it?"

Zuko broke a biscuit in half. "If you really want to feel like old times, I could, uhh … chase you around a while and try to capture you." It was a somewhat lame attempt at humor; but Aang, Sokka, and Toph laughed good-naturedly. Suki laughed along with them, though she hadn't encountered Zuko trying to capture Aang as often as the others had.

"Ha, ha." Katara's voice was hard and utterly humorless. She stared intently at the fire, remembering how their campfires used to make her think wistfully of Zuko—before he stabbed her in the back at Ba Sing Se. For a moment there, Katara had hoped that Zuko would join their group; and she had gotten her wish, only when she no longer desired it.

Sokka raised his cup. "To Zuko. Who knew after all those times he tried to snuff us out, today he'd be our hero."

"Here, here," Toph, Aang, and Suki chorused.

Zuko smiled gratefully. "I'm touched." He couldn't tell them what it meant to him, to feel like part of a group—this ragtag surrogate family. "I don't deserve this."

Katara looked up from her bowl to glare at him. "Yeah, no kidding." She stood and left the circle.

Sokka raised an eyebrow. "What's with her?"

Zuko watched Katara's retreating form. "I wish I knew," he said, rising to his feet.

Katara knelt down near the edge of a cliff, looking out at the full moon above and the ocean below. Usually she enjoyed looking at a full moon; but now it was only a bitter reminder of the last full moon, the marking of a month since that horrifying night.

She heard footsteps behind her. Zuko. She stood up and moved away. "We need to talk," Zuko said, getting right to the point.

"So talk." She didn't even look at him, but kept her back toward him.

Zuko bit his lip. Where could he even start?

"I don't really know what I expected," he said finally. "I guess part of me hoped that we could be friends—again—if I joined you guys. Maybe that was too much to hope for. But the way you're acting now … you're not even just ignoring me. You're treating me like …"

"You don't deserve a place with us."

"Yeah. Like that." It took him a moment to realize that she had meant it as a statement, not an ending to his own sentence.

"You're lucky I agreed to let you stay within a mile of us. What more do you want from me?"

"I'm not asking you to love me!" Zuko tried to keep himself from shouting, though his tone was clearly frustrated. "I just don't want you to hate me!"

The same memory resurfaced in both of their minds. "_I don't hate you. I never have, and I never will. There's nothing you can do that will make me hate you."_ Katara may have meant those words when she said them; but she had been wrong. Now she did hate him.

"Just stop treating me like the enemy," Zuko said.

Katara finally turned around to look at him. "For a long time, that's how you _wanted_ to be treated, and how you treated the rest of us."

"Not anymore! I'm sick and tired of being your enemy."

"Well, you were a lot better at being our enemy than being my friend."

Zuko wasn't even sure if that was true. He'd lost count of all the times he'd acted as a friend to her. Sometimes it had been as trivial as returning a necklace; a few times it had been as significant as saving her life. But, in her view at least, his misdeeds outweighed his acts of kindness.

"Why did you save me today?"

It was a question she hadn't been expecting. "That's was Aang's plan, he steered Appa—"

"But you were the one who made sure you guys caught me."

Her brow was furrowed in confusion. "What, do you think I should have let you fall?"

"No," Zuko fumbled, "of course not—I'm grateful—"

"Don't be." Katara folded her arms. "I didn't do it for you. I did it for Aang—he still needs a firebending teacher. And if Iroh's still alive … I couldn't face him if I had let you die."

Zuko frowned, studying her. "So you're saying it had nothing to do with you caring about me. Not even as a friend."

"That's right." She could tell he didn't really believe her. Her expression became a glare. "Tell me this, Zuko. How did Azula find us today?"

Zuko blinked at her. "She might have tracked us … after we stole her airship …"

"So you led her right to our hiding place."

"That wasn't intentional! And I could be wrong. Maybe she just finally had the idea of checking the nearest Air Temple. It was the first place _I_ looked, after I was banished. We're lucky we were able to hide there for as long as we did."

"So, you knew we might be in danger, and you didn't see fit to tell anyone?"

Zuko felt his own temper rising. It was like she _wanted_ something she could accuse him of.

"This isn't fair," Zuko said. "I broke your father out of prison, and saved your life twice today. Everyone else seems to trust me now. Why won't you?"

"Oh, everyone trusts you now?" she snapped. She placed her hand over her heart. "I was the first person to trust you, remember? And after that, every time I started to trust you, you turned around and betrayed me—betrayed all of us!"

Zuko looked at her. Now he was starting to understand. It wasn't only a question of trust; it was also a question of forgiveness.

"You're right," he acknowledged. "And I'm sorry. It was unfair—"

He could have sworn he heard the waves crash even louder as Katara's voice and temper rose. "Unfair? He was _dead_, do you understand? My best friend, our greatest hope—I carried his body out of the Catacombs while your uncle sacrificed his freedom to let us escape. The only reason Aang is alive now is because I was able to heal him with the Spirit Water—the water I offered to use to heal your scar barely twenty minutes before!"

Zuko nodded, and, not knowing how else to respond, he said quietly, "Yeah, that's why I thought he must still be alive—because you had the Spirit Water."

"If you could put us through that, how can I expect you to care about us to any degree? If you could stand by while our only hope for peace was killed, how can I expect you to value any of us?"

Put that way, it made sense that she wouldn't trust him, much less forgive him or like him. But Zuko needed her to understand, to believe, that he was sorry, that he had changed for good. "What can I do to convince you—to make it up to you?" he asked.

"You really want to know?" Katara pretended to consider. "Hmm, maybe you could reconquer Ba Sing Se in the name of the Earth King. Or, I know—" Zuko took a step back as Katara came up to him, a slightly deranged smile flashing briefly across her face. "—you could bring my mother back!" She pushed past him and stalked back to the campsite, leaving Zuko alone on the cliff. The waves broke loudly against the rocks below, then seemed to hiss with seething foam.

In the campsite, the others had finished eating and cleaned up the dinner plates. On the way to her tent, Katara passed Toph sitting outside her two-slabbed earth tent. "Are you done?" Toph asked casually. "Did you get your anger out?"

Katara stopped short. "Were you eavesdropping?"

"It's not eavesdropping if people are shouting and you happen to have acute hearing." Katara scowled. "Man, forget 'Sugar Queen,'" Toph said. "You're now officially 'Ice Queen.'"

"Toph, I'm not in the mood to put up with you and your jokes."

"Well, I got Zuko into the group, so I think it's fair that I make sure you don't drive him out."

Katara shook her head in disgust. "I don't understand you. You saw—you _felt—_how Aang was after Ba Sing Se. How can you forgive him for that?"

"You're _blam_ing the wrong person. Azula was the one who shot the lightning, not Zuko. Why don't you take your anger out on her instead?"

Katara was taken aback at this retort. Toph tapped a finger against her chin. "Oh, right, Azula's not _here_. But Zuko is, so you'll just direct all your hatred for the Fire Nation at _him_ instead—"

"That's _not_ how it is!" Katara insisted, grasping for sound reasons. "Zuko wasn't innocent that day. If he had helped us instead of Azula, we might have stood a chance against her—we could have escaped without Aang getting hurt and Iroh being captured—we might even have stopped her from taking Ba Sing Se!"

"You're wrong about the last part. The Dai Li had already taken over when Sokka and I got back."

"Well, maybe the end result doesn't even matter. What really matters is his intention. He was so deliberate in turning against us."

"And now he's being deliberate in helping us."

Katara turned away with a disgusted sigh.

"What's this really about?" Toph asked. "The fact that he's Fire Nation? Or the fact that you felt something for him?"

"Don't talk to me about things you don't understand!" Katara raged. "You have no idea what it's like—"

"To care about someone? To take risks for them, and then watch them make mistakes? To think about them so much that, even when you're not together, they're part of your mindset?"

Katara was pretty sure she knew who Toph was talking about, but she didn't bother asking. If she was right, it couldn't even compare. "You don't know what it's like to be betrayed by someone you care about."

"Wrong again. I felt betrayed when my dad grounded me for life, and again I went to see my parents and ended up captured by the bounty hunters they'd hired."

Annoyed and agitated, Katara took a few steps away, then turned and walked back to Toph. When she spoke her voice was low and laced with frustration. "You really want to know what's wrong? I was just about over him. I had accepted that he chose to side with his family. But then he changed his mind _again_, and turned against the people he'd sided with. That shows how easily he could switch sides. As for our so-called relationship, all he's done is try to tear open wounds that have already healed—"

Toph stomped her foot, shaking the ground a little. "They have not healed! If they had, you wouldn't be hurting so much now!"

_What makes you think I'm hurting now?_ Katara wanted to demand. But she couldn't get the words out, so instead she glared with an intensity that Toph couldn't see. Then she turned on her heel and started for her tent again.

She heard Toph speak to her back. "Remember how it was with Jet? No one really forgave him until it was too late."

Katara scowled, though her heart felt a little heavier at the mention of the Freedom Fighter. It didn't seem true to say that she had forgiven Jet, because she hadn't personally had anything against him. It was different with Zuko, who had hurt her personally.

Katara had blamed Zuko for the death of the Moon Spirit, since Zuko's kidnapping Aang had prevented them from stopping Zhao from reaching the Spirit Oasis. Sokka had blamed Iroh for convincing Yue to sacrifice her life for the Moon Spirit. Zuko had believed it was Katara and Aang's fault that he and Iroh had become fugitives. Katara blamed Zuko for Jet's death, since Jet had been arrested while trying to expose Zuko and Iroh as firebenders. Zuko then blamed Katara when she inadvertently told Azula of Zuko and Iroh's whereabouts in Ba Sing Se. And now, Katara had somehow connected her anger and pain of her mother's death with her anger and pain from Zuko. It seemed like a vicious cycle of hurt and anger being passed back and forth, and ricocheting off of other people they loved.

* * *

><p>Zuko decided to tell Sokka about his idea before suggesting it to Katara.<p>

The Water Tribe boy was skeptical at best. Zuko couldn't be sure if his concern was caused by the nature of the plan or the fact that it involved him going off alone with Katara.

"I know you and Katara have some stuff to work out and whatnot, but … is this really the best way to do it?"

"I think so," Zuko said honestly.

"Who are you doing this for? Her or you?"

Zuko blinked at him. "I'm doing it for both of us," he said, sounding the slightest bit defensive. "She'll be more at peace if she faces the past. And I'll be more at peace if I regain her friendship."

Sokka raised a critical eyebrow, but it was hidden behind his loosened bangs. "Are you sure it's just her friendship you want?"

Zuko felt his cheeks burn. "You're one to talk," he griped, gesturing at the tent. He'd found Sokka lying in a tent with a strategically romantic ambiance, complete with candles and a rose. Sokka backed off, once again abashed.

"I'm not trying to win her heart," Zuko maintained. "I just want to earn back her respect. I want to _deserve_ her respect. If we work together on something—like we've done before—she might accept that I'm her ally. Can you understand that?"

"I guess," Sokka said grudgingly.

"If you're at all uncomfortable with this …"

"No, it's not that. I trust you to go on a field trip with my sister," Sokka said, surprising both of them with the truth of those words. "But if she agrees, just … be careful. Take care of her for me, okay?"

Zuko nodded. "Thanks, Sokka." He stood, but paused at the tent flap. "And, a word of advice? Don't do anything with Suki that you wouldn't want me to do with Katara." He slipped out before he could see Sokka's reaction.

He spent the rest of the night sitting on a tree stump outside Katara's tent. He couldn't sleep with this idea on his mind, and he wanted to tell it to her at the first chance he got. That chance didn't come until quite a while after the sun had risen. Katara finally stepped outside, and frowned when she saw Zuko.

She walked past him to her bag of belongings. "You look terrible," she said, foregoing any greetings. Not that he had expected one.

"I waited out here all night," Zuko explained as he stood.

"What do you want?" Katara asked, her back to him as she started to comb her hair.

"I thought about what you said last night."

"Which bit?"

"The bit about your mother."

Katara froze, the comb halfway through her long hair. She hadn't been serious when she said that; she'd meant that his making up with her was impossible. What was he playing at now?

"I can't bring your mother back. But I can help you find the man who killed her."

When she turned to look at him, her expression was shocked, but then seemed to harden. "Tell me more."

"Sokka told me what he remembers from that day. Those soldiers would have been from the Southern Raiders division of the navy. I know where we could get the information to track them down."

Katara narrowed her eyes at him. It sounded so easy, and yet it had never occurred to her that it was possible. "You're serious?"

"I've never been more serious in my life."

"So, you want me to follow you to some unknown destination so I can avenge what happened to my mother?"

He was quiet for a few seconds, but then he said, "Yes."

Katara looked at him for a long moment. Zuko expression was as sincere as could be—and she knew from experience how sincere that was.

Agreeing would mean trusting his word, and giving him power over what happened to her. But he knew she had just as much control over what happened to him. Neither of them had forgotten the promise she'd made when he joined.

But she wasn't going to get another chance like this, during this interlude between battles, to go on a mission with a motive that was personal rather than political.

"All right." Katara glanced over at the others who were just getting out of their tents. "We'll ask Aang if we can take Appa."

Unfortunately, when Aang heard about it, he didn't think it was a good idea.

Zuko spoke up in their defense. "She needs this, Aang. This is about getting closure, and justice."

"I don't think so," Aang said flatly. "I think it's about getting revenge."

"Fine!" Katara said angrily. "Maybe it is. Maybe that's what I need. Maybe that's what he deserves."

"You sound like Jet," Aang argued. Katara and Zuko looked at him blankly. "I mean—before you met him. The way he talked about getting rid of the Fire Nation, and hurting anyone who got in his way." He frowned, considering. "Actually, you sound like Hama." Aang hadn't heard Hama when she talked about seeking revenge on her enemies, but Katara had described her motive to them after the ordeal.

"It's not the same!" Katara insisted. "Hama hurt innocent people; they had nothing to do with what happened to her. This man is not innocent; he's directly responsible for what happened to her, to my family!"

Aang looked at her sympathetically, then bowed his head. "The monks used to say that revenge is like a two-headed rat-viper. While you watch your enemy go down, you're being poisoned yourself."

"That's cute," Zuko said. "But this isn't air temple preschool. This is the real world." It would have been easy for Air Nomads to preach about forgiveness during times of peace. It was much more difficult to put into practice in a time when most people had given and received pain.

Katara spoke up again. "Now that I know he's out there—now that I know we could find him—I feel like I have no choice."

"You do have a choice. Forgiveness."

"That's the same as doing nothing," Zuko said.

"No," Aang said adamantly. "It's easy to do nothing. It's hard to forgive."

"It's not just hard; it's impossible," Katara stated.

Zuko stared at her as she went back to the campsite. Her last words hurt him, even though they weren't necessarily directed at him.

But, surely it would be easier for her to forgive him than to forgive the man who killed her mother? Zuko hadn't done something as heinous as killing someone, much less someone Katara loved, who should have been present throughout her life. If she could see that, maybe it would be easier for her to forgive him. Maybe.

* * *

><p>Later, after he had spent a few hours training with Aang, he found Katara sitting by herself near the fire pit, trying to mend some clothes. He came up in time to see her prick her finger with the needle, not for the first time that day. She couldn't really focus, even though she was trying to appear busy as usual.<p>

Zuko spoke up, voicing a question about their last conversation. "Who is Hama?"

She closed her eyes, clearly reluctant, which made Zuko think he'd made a mistake in asking. But she put down the fabric and answered him calmly. "She was another victim in the Fire Nation raids, long before I was born. Only they didn't kill her; they put her in a prison with all the other waterbenders from our tribe."

Zuko felt an uneasy guilt welling up inside him. He had once threatened to give Katara that fate. Then he had stopped Zhao from doing the same thing.

Katara bit her lip. "I remember Iroh saying something about how to choose battles."

"Yeah, he said that to me too," Zuko said. He recalled the phrase, but Iroh hadn't given any concrete advice on how to do it.

"Well, Hama chose the wrong battle. And that's what Aang thinks I'm doing now."

They were both silent for a moment. Then Zuko spoke up again. "I know my people hurt yours—even more than I hurt you. But I want to try to make up for both cases."

Katara's frown deepened. "Why?" The question came out in a strange tone, at once both harsh and broken.

"I could say because I owe you," Zuko said frankly. "But actually, it's because it feels like the right thing to do."

She finally looked at him, gauging his sincerity. Then she nodded, apparently accepting his reasoning. "We'll leave tonight, with or without Aang's blessing."

Zuko frowned, slightly surprised that she would be wiling to go behind Aang's back, but nodded. "If you're sure."

"I'm sure."

Zuko turned to his bag of belongings and took out some black clothing, which he passed to Katara. "Here."

She almost smiled in her incredulity. "Don't tell me. You want me to be the Blue Spirit's sidekick, or something?"

"The Blue Spirit died at Lake Laogai." She looked surprised and confused at this. Zuko shrugged indifferently. "I don't hide behind it anymore. But we'll still need to be stealthy."

"Well, I have some experience with that," Katara said. Zuko was about to ask what she meant—that sounded like an interesting conversation—but then she was packing up her meager tools and supplies. She didn't want to interact with him any more than necessary. But at least they had a plan, and would be able to spend more time together—hopefully, Zuko thought, enough time to heal whatever wounds she had accumulated from the Fire Nation, and from him.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I'm sorry this chapter took so long! I've been busy with the college life, but I also had trouble figuring out how to orchestrate this crucial part of the story. I know where I want to take this adventure, but I'm working out how to get there. I might end up rearranging a bit later, but in the meantime here's what I have ready.

By the way: if you readers ever see gaps in the narration or mistakes in my spelling or grammar, please let me know in a review! Things get lost when I upload documents, and sometimes I don't have time to read the posted product.

Artwork for this chapter: "Zutara: Afraid to Care" by KyokoMari on DeviantArt


	43. Reconciliation

_Published December 18, 2013_

"Reconciliation"

When God saw by their actions how they turned from their evil way, he repented of the evil that he had threatened to do to them; he did not carry it out. ~ Jonah 3:10, New American Bible

* * *

><p>Aang chose not to be upset when he found them about to leave. "It's okay. I forgive you," he said solemnly. Then he smiled hopefully. "That give you any ideas?"<p>

Katara ignored the question. "Don't try to stop us."

"I wasn't planning to." Katara and Zuko looked to Aang in slight surprise. "This is a journey you need to take," Aang said simply. "You need to face this man."

Katara nodded and climbed up onto Appa's saddle; but Aang wasn't finished. "But when you do, _please_ don't choose revenge. Let your anger out, and then let it go. Forgive him."

"Okay," Zuko said, attempting some of the sarcasm he'd heard Sokka use. "We'll be sure to do that, Guru Goody-Goody."

"Thanks for understanding, Aang," Katara said as Zuko followed her onto the bison. Then she turned away and flicked the reins. "Yip-yip."

It took several hours of island-hopping to find a Fire Nation communication tower, where Zuko had explained they would be able to find out the current location of the Southern Raiders.

They hid Appa on another nearby island while they snuck into the communication tower. Katara was able to get them across the water, making a sheet of ice as a raft and then propelling it with her own current. She could be just as swift and silent as Zuko. It made sense, considering she was a waterbender; her movements had to be smooth, as fluid as her element.

He had hoped to find a sewage system, like the one at the Pouhai Stronghold that had allowed him to retrieve Aang. But they found and used a ventilation system instead. It worked even better, as they found a grating in the very office where they could find the information they needed.

They worked side by side, taking turns leading and acting. She bent the receptionist's water-based ink to make her leave to clean up, and Zuko sorted through their records to find a current map that included the Southern Raiders' location.

Zuko thought the phrase "partners in crime" described what they were on this mission. They were allies with a common goal. The last (and first) time they'd acted this way was when he rescued her from Zhao—but even then he had been the one leading and rescuing. Now they were operating as equals.

Even though they hardly spoke, and for the most part couldn't see the other's face, it felt good to be working together again.

* * *

><p>It was the middle of the day when Zuko woke up. The sun was up, and Katara was still at the reins. She must not have slept at all since the night before last.<p>

"You should get some sleep. You're going to need all your strength."

"Don't you worry about my strength," Katara said in a hard, low voice. "I have plenty. I'm not the helpless little girl I was then."

Zuko was hesitating, wanting to ask her to tell her side of the story, but then Katara started without his requesting. "When they came, I left Sokka behind and went back to our house. My mom was in there … but she wasn't alone. One of the raiders was there too."

"Did you see his face?" Zuko hated to interrupt, when it was clearly so hard for her to tell this story, but he needed to know in order to find him.

"Yeah, at least part of it. He had a helmet, but he wasn't wearing a mask like the other soldiers. He looked right at me. He heard me call her 'Mom'. He knew that she was a mother … but it didn't make a difference to him." She swallowed, trying to keep herself from crying. She wouldn't let Zuko see her cry, especially not now, when he was expecting her to be strong on this mission.

"She didn't want me to get hurt. She said she'd give him some information if he let me go. She told me to go find my dad, and the man said to listen to her. So I left her behind. I ran as fast as I could. I found my dad fighting and we both went back to the house … but we were too late. When we got there, the man was gone." Katara's voice cracked slightly. "And so was she."

Zuko was silent for a moment. When Katara had first mentioned her mother to him—the day they both started to realize there was more to the other than met the eye—he'd expressed sympathy. But when he spoke now, his voice was solemn and respectful. "Your mother was a brave woman."

Katara touched her necklace. "I know."

It was a while before Zuko spoke again, after thinking hard. "He must have been their leader."

Katara actually turned around to look at him questioningly. "What makes you so sure?"

"The fact that he was interrogating someone, looking for information, instead of fighting. It shows that he wasn't an average soldier, duty-bound to obey orders and fight. He had a more specific purpose." He had been a man with a mission. Which would mean that raid wasn't random.

Zuko started to catch a glimmer of it, then—he could think about the situation a little more objectively than Katara could, when she had so many emotions attached to that memory. But he couldn't be certain. So he kept his silence for the rest of the flight.

* * *

><p>She did get some rest a few hours later. She didn't ask him to take a turn; she just didn't resist when he silently took the reins from her. He spared her from having to ask him for anything. He didn't even have to ask her to show him how to steer Appa; Aang had taught him during their journey home from the Sun Warriors' temple.<p>

It was after dark when they came upon the solitary ship. Zuko spotted it and alerted Katara, who was instantly awake and ready for action.

The operation actually went quite smoothly. Zuko was impressed by the skill he saw Katara use; he'd never seen her make an air pocket underwater. The huge wave she created to sweep the soldiers off the deck reminded him of her actions on his old ship during the storm.

They were rather lucky: the soldiers they encountered hadn't fought in battle for a long time (if they ever had), and they weren't expecting an attack now. The wave washed all but one off them into the water, and Katara easily sent the last one the same way. They weren't far south enough for the soldiers to be in danger of catching hypothermia—at least, they thought not. Katara and Zuko were both familiar with much colder waters, and this was nothing in comparison. They would survive.

They found the captain, and though Zuko was the one who shouted questions at him, Katara was the one who subdued him, with a technique Zuko had never seen her use before. She stopped him from firebending and forced him to bend over on the floor. That was when the man's helmet and half-mask fell off. They made him look Katara in the face to recognize her—and then Katara realized that she didn't recognize him.

For a moment, Katara felt defeated. That was, until the man said, "You must be looking for Yon Rha. He retired four years ago."

Her determination was renewed with her hope—a dark hope, but better than the sense of defeat that had just threatened to overwhelm her. They could still find her mother's murdered—they even knew his name now. That was more than they'd known before.

They had to double back to the communication tower to find out where Yon Rha was living now. It was morning by the time they obtained the information, and it would take less than a day to get there.

"Retired," Katara said morosely. "Why didn't I think of that? I knew he was old—his face had wrinkles—"

"We messed up. It won't happen again."

"I'm such an idiot," Katara moaned.

"I thought that was me," Zuko muttered.

Zuko helped himself to some rations for breakfast, and tried to coax her into eating some food, despite her lack of appetite. The truth was that she didn't think she could keep anything down. It was all she could do to sip some water.

"Did you enjoy that?" Katara asked, her voice hard and casual at the same time.

"What?"

"Breaking into the communication tower, and going on the ship? I saw that look in your eyes. That … intensity. Or anger. It's the same look you used to have when you fought us, or when you thought you were winning."

Zuko looked at her. "You had that look, too."

"I knew you still had that in you. That harshness."

"Maybe. But I never knew you had it in you."

Katara didn't answer. For a moment Zuko wondered if he had been wrong to suggest this mission. If it was just bringing out the worst in them, it might harm Katara more than it helped her. And if they failed again—she would have brought back all those negative emotions for nothing.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," she said tonelessly.

"What … what you did to the captain back there?"

She curled up in the saddle, resting her arms on her knees. "It's called bloodbending. It can only be done on the full moon. Hama used it to escape her prison. … And for years, she used it to imprison people in the Fire Nation. People who had nothing to do with the crime she was punishing them for." Katara sounded miserable. "Like I just did."

"You didn't know."

"But the effect was the same. I shouldn't have used bloodbending at all. I swore I wouldn't, after we left Hama." She had broken her vow, and gained nothing from it. She wiped her eyes; she would _not_ cry in front of Zuko. Still, her voice was tearful. "What would the others think of me now? What would my dad think of me?"

Zuko turned around to look at her. "They don't have to know about this."

Katara sniffed. "Yue knows. She's the moon; she's the reason I feel that kind of power every month." She hadn't been able to tell Hama that they had known the Moon Spirit, and that she wouldn't want waterbenders to use the power she gave them in such a heinous way.

Zuko wanted to hug her—she looked like she needed some comfort, some reassurance—but he stayed at the reins. He didn't think she would accept his comfort anyway. Instead he spoke up quietly.

"Katara? We can go back—meet the others—if you want. It's your call." He didn't want her to do this just because he had given her the opportunity. She could change her mind if she wanted.

But Katara shook her head. When she spoke, her voice was lower, more controlled, and decisive. "We've come this far. I'm not turning back now."

Zuko bit his lip. "You sound like me. I know what it's like. After you've decided and started something, and put so much effort into accomplishing it—even after you fail, and even if you start to doubt your intentions—you still want to go through with it."

"What's your point?" Katara asked, sounding a bit harsh.

"Just that you don't want to resign yourself to doing something, and end up regretting it later. I know what that's like, and it's—one of the worst feelings in the world."

Right, Katara thought. He knew that from experience.

Zuko knew that she knew what he was thinking of. They both knew that it was his reason for offering to go on this journey. It was something they still needed to resolve, something they had been skirting around for weeks. There was no easy way to lead into it, so he might as well address it now.

"Look, Katara … when we were in Ba Sing Se …" He saw her tense slightly but went on regardless. "… after you and Aang left, Azula came in with some of the Dai Li. They trapped my uncle in the crystals, but Azula actually talked to me, and asked for my help." Katara looked up sharply at this, her eyes hard, but keeping a lid on her anger. "She didn't threaten me … she just told me that I was free to choose."

"Wasn't that the same choice I gave you?" Katara asked. She wasn't being snarky or rhetorical; her tone was neutral, even clinical.

"Yeah, but even you weren't sure, were you? You didn't know if Aang and the others would accept me, so you couldn't fully offer me a place with you."

Katara didn't deny this. Zuko took a deep breath, trying to collect his thoughts enough to explain in a way that she would understand. "Look … I know what I did in Ba Sing Se was wrong, but at the time, it seemed like the wiser decision would be to side with my family. I know what you're thinking, that Uncle is my family, but I mean my immediate family. My _little sister_ said she needed me. She had never said that to me before, and I … I wanted to believe it. And as much as I cared about you … or _wanted_ to be with you … well, it was never as consistent as my need for a home, for acceptance from my own people."

Katara said nothing, didn't even look at him. Her face wasn't hardened, though; she seemed to have reverted back to her state of trying to hold herself together.

She did understand what he meant. Hadn't she made the same choice, each time she sided with Aang and fought against Zuko? She had fought for her family, her friends, her country; and he had fought for his family, and his country.

Zuko looked toward the horizon again, and spoke with his back facing Katara. "It wasn't until the battle ended that I saw which side Uncle had chosen, and realized that I'd gone against the family that really mattered to me. That was when I started feeling regret—as soon as Ba Sing Se had been conquered."

"So, you didn't get what you wanted?" Katara tried to clarify.

"No, I did. But somehow … I wasn't satisfied. I went to the prison to see Uncle … I was so angry, and confused … it took me all those weeks to figure out why. I felt regret for what I did … and the need to do something more with my life than sit around and watch the war from a distance. And this time I wanted to be on the side that fights for good."

Katara was silent. Zuko tried to form a reasonable conclusion. "Maybe I don't deserve your forgiveness. But I want you to know, I am sorry for what I did."

There was only a moment of silence before she said, "I know."

Zuko opened his mouth, but then closed it again. Did that acknowledgement—if that was really what it was—mean that she forgave him? He could only hope so. He had probably been wrong to bring up the subject now, when she had so much else to think about.

Katara's own thoughts seemed to form a circuit, going from Zuko to Hama to Yon Rha to the captain whose name she didn't know, whose blood she had needlessly bent. She had sworn that she would never use bloodbending, because she didn't want to end up like Hama, taking her anger out on the wrong people. But that was exactly what she had done tonight. And Toph believed that she had been mistakenly taking her anger toward the Fire Nation out on Zuko.

Hama had shown her what grudges and revenge could do to a person. What if she held on to her anger toward Zuko the way she held on to her hatred far Yon Rha? She really could kill him. And she would have, if he had ever seemed to pose a threat to Aang. But it would have torn her apart inside, to kill someone she cared about, who—she wanted so much to believe—wanted to be good again.

* * *

><p>She didn't do it.<p>

Zuko wasn't sure what amazed him more: the story that Yon Rha relayed to them, revealing the reason he had killed the woman; the power Katara exhibited, waterbending in the rain; or the fact that Katara restrained herself at the last second.

Zuko thought he could hear the man crying as they left. He wondered if the man felt any true regret, or had simply groveled out of fear. Yon Rha had admitted that what he did was wrong, but he hadn't apologized.

They found Appa where they had left him, hidden a short distance away. Katara let Zuko take the reins while she sat by herself in the saddle. Zuko took it upon himself to decide what they should do now. There were just a few hours left until nightfall. They could travel back to the island where they had left the others—but he didn't think Katara would like to be bombarded with questions, and then have to tell them what she did. Perhaps he could drop her off at the hiding place that he had in mind, and then pick up the others, giving her some time alone.

But when he looked at her, hardened with grief and almost shaking with anxiety, he didn't want to leave her alone.

Zuko knew that camping would slow down their schedule—he'd already spent two full days away from the pupil he was supposed to be training—but the rain would be miserable to fly in, and he rather thought that they needed time to rest after everything that had happened.

They only had to travel a few miles away from Yon Rha's village when he spotted a shelter. "Katara?" She seemed startled when he said her name. "There's a cave down there. I think we should stop to make camp. We can meet up with the others tomorrow."

"Okay." She wasn't in the right mental state to argue.

Zuko had Appa land just outside the shelter, blocking the entrance from the wind and rain. Katara slipped down quickly, pulling their packs down with her. Once inside the cave, she waved her hands to bend the rainwater out of her hair and clothes, then tossed it outside. Zuko followed her, daring to ask, "Do you think you could …"

"What—oh, sure." Katara held her hand out towards him, and for a second it looked like the same gesture she'd used when bloodbending the night before. But all it did was dry him off.

"Thanks." Zuko held a flame up in one hand, shedding some light in the cave. Katara turned back to Appa to pull down their packs. "Are you okay?" he asked her.

"Yeah." Zuko suspected—with good reason—that her response was either automatic, or untruthful. He wished he knew what she was thinking.

He waited until he had made a decent fire and they had unpacked their borrowed supplies. His curiosity finally got the better of him, and he dared to ask: "Why did you do it?"

Katara thought she had heard wrong, that he must have asked why she _didn't_ do it. But Zuko went on, "We could have turned back. Why did you go through with searching for him if you didn't want to do anything to him?"

Katara looked down at her hands, which lay limp on her lap. "I couldn't pass up a chance to see him … to see who he really was. To show him what he did that day. And I _wanted_ to do it. I wanted to take out all my anger on him … but I just couldn't." She sighed. "I don't know if it's because I was too weak to do it, or because I was strong enough not to."

"You're not weak. I know that for a fact."

Katara's eyes flickered back to him, but not for long. She avoided his gaze, but voiced some of the thoughts she'd had in the past hour. "It didn't mean anything to him, except for one accomplishment in his career. But he didn't have any conviction. He didn't believe that it was something that had to be done. He wasn't proud of what he did, but he wasn't ashamed either, until I flung it back in his face." She paused. "I guess I should thank you."

Zuko looked up and blinked at her. "For what?"

"For helping me find him. I think Aang was right—it was a journey I needed to take. And I couldn't have done it without you." She finally looked him in the eyes. "You have my thanks."

Zuko nodded. "You're welcome." He couldn't say he'd been glad to do it, but it had felt right. At least, it had felt right when they set out to do it, and when they worked in silent cooperation. At the other times … it was harder to tell.

He watched her turn to their small pile of supplies, trying to make something resembling a meal. Her hands shook when she picked up the bowls, and Zuko suspected it wasn't because of the temperature.

"Are you really okay, Katara?"

Katara set the bowls on the ground. "No, I'm not okay." Her voice trembled when she spoke. She bowed her head and closed her eyes. "I'm still reliving every moment back there—questioning every move I made—trying to process what I found out." She hugged her knees to her chest. "I can't believe I never knew," she said, her voice almost a whisper. "My mom died to save me. She died because of _me._"

Zuko looked at her sharply. "You're not blaming yourself, are you?"

Katara opened her eyes and looked up at him, blinking back tears. "No," she said, her voice choked.

"Good," Zuko said. "Because it's not your fault. Your mother knew what she was doing. And if she hadn't done what she did—well, what would have happened to you? Where would we be now? If _you_ had died, you never would have met Aang, or found him teachers, or helped me change, or done any of the things you've done. I know it's meant to be this way."

Katara rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand. She wondered if this was how Aang felt, knowing that the Air Nomads had died because of his disappearance. If he had done the right thing, and stayed with them instead of running away, then he would have been killed along with the rest of his people, and wouldn't have met all of his friends, or come to deliver them from this war.

She remembered Sokka mourning for Yue, wondering why she had to be the one to die in order to save her people and the Moon Spirit. Katara had reassured him that the spirits had known what they were doing, but now she felt the same sense of despairing loss.

If some situation was _meant to be_, why did fate or whatever spirits controlled destiny have to sacrifice others to get there?

Zuko was still talking. "The fact that she lied to protect you … it proves that you're a lot like her, with your willingness to sacrifice. Remember when I captured you? I never forgot how you told Aang to leave you behind. You sacrificed your freedom so he could stay free. And you were willing to go with Zhao to get me out of trouble. That's your mother in you."

Katara smiled faintly, but it did not reach her eyes.

"Actually, I kind of know how you feel," Zuko said, sifting his fingers through the loose dirt. Katara looked up and stared at him. "Something else we have in common—we lost our mothers because they were trying to protect us. They both made sacrifices for us."

They sat in silence for a moment, until Katara asked the unspoken question hanging in the air. "Zuko? What—" Katara cleared her throat. "What happened to your mother?"

Zuko didn't answer right away. Katara could tell it was a hard topic for him to discuss. She continued, "When I was your prisoner, and I told you the Fire Nation took my mother away from me, you said that was something we had in common. I didn't understand—actually, I still don't—did they really take her away from you? Is she …" Katara trailed off, not wanting to say the word.

"I think she might still be alive," Zuko said, staring at the fire. "I only recently found out what really happened." He was silent for a long moment, trying to collect his thoughts—his own memories mingled with the information Ozai had told him during the Day of Black Sun.

"You know that my uncle had a son. My cousin, Lu Ten, was already a teenager when Azula and I were born. I was eight when he died in the Siege of Ba Sing Se," Zuko began. Katara looked at him, slightly surprised at the seemingly unrelated beginning, but she listened patiently.

"My uncle ended the siege and headed for home. Before he returned, my father requested an audience with my grandfather, Fire Lord Azulon. My grandpa knew something was up; he dismissed my mom and Azula and me so he could talk to my dad in private, but Azula and I eavesdropped. My father …" Zuko closed his eyes for a moment. Katara watched him with concern. "My father asked Azulon to revoke Uncle Iroh's birthright to become Fire Lord. With Lu Ten dead, his bloodline had ended; but if my dad inherited the throne, either Azula or I would become heir to the throne."

"I don't see how this is connected …" Katara began tentatively.

"Sorry; I'm going into too much detail—I guess I have a lot to get off my chest." Zuko tried halfheartedly to smile. "Anyway, Azulon was furious with my father. I left at that point, but Azula stayed behind to listen. Later, she came into my bedroom and said that Dad was going to kill me. At first, I thought she just meant I was in trouble, but then she said she was being serious. According to her, Azulon decided that my dad should know what it was like for Iroh to lose a son, by sacrificing his own."

Katara gaped at Zuko.

Zuko's voice became bitter. "Of course, killing Azula would have hurt my dad more emotionally—she was his favorite, as much as I was my mom's. But killing Azula was out of the question; she was the obviously better firebender, and as cunning and cruel a strategist as my father, grandfather, and great-grandfather.

"My mom found us talking and made Azula leave. I fell asleep, but my mom woke me up sometime later in the night. She was in a hurry—and she acted weird, giving me advice, saying that she loved me." Katara saw a tear trickle out of Zuko's good eye. He was silent for a moment, then swallowed hard and went on haltingly. "The next morning, I got up and I couldn't find her anywhere. Azula told me that Mom was gone, and Azulon had died that night."

Katara covered her mouth with her hands. She hadn't felt this kind of horror since the night Iroh told the story of Zuko's banishment.

"No one would tell me anything. But after that, my father was crowned Fire Lord. Eventually I decided my mom was probably dead, even though we never officially mourned her. But then …"

"What?"

Zuko glanced at Katara, and then looked back at the fire. "During the eclipse, I went to the bunker to talk to my father. I figured it was the only time I would be able to speak my mind to him without getting burned." He reached up and touched his scar, tracing its outline around his eye. "He tried to stall me so I would stay until the eclipse was over. He asked me if I wanted to know what had happened to my mother."

"Oh, Zuko …"

"It was the first time anyone had offered an answer, and I figured it might be the last. So I asked him what really happened. It wasn't that hard to figure out, now that I think about it. Azula had told me the truth—and my father said he was going to do it. But my mom wouldn't let it happen. She proposed a plan that would get them both what they wanted: my father would become Fire Lord, and my life would be spared." Zuko fell silent.

"She killed your grandfather." Katara's voice was heavy and sympathetic. She tried to wrap her mind around it. Zuko's mother had made the choice that she had turned down. But Ursa had done it to protect someone. If Yon Rha had threatened to kill someone she loved—she imagined a child of her own—she would have killed, too, to protect them.

Zuko nodded. "That's what my dad hinted. For her treason, she was banished. Hmph—just like me."

"So she's still alive," Katara said, looking hopeful for the first time that night.

"Maybe."

"That's good, right? I mean, you still have a chance of finding her and seeing her again. At least that's something." It was more than she had.

"I guess." Zuko stared at the ground. "You know what she told me? The last thing my mother said to me was, 'No matter how things seem to change, never forget who you are.'" Zuko bowed his head. "But I did. For three years, I didn't want to be myself; I wanted to be the person my father wanted me to be—who everyone expected me to be."

Katara scooted over to Zuko, sitting next to him, and slipped her hand into his. He looked up at her in surprise; her eyes were shining with tears—not for herself or Kya, but for Zuko and Ursa. "I think your mother would be proud of you," Katara said, her voice soft but earnest. "Maybe you did forget; but then you remembered. And going through everything you did—forgetting who you are—helped you to become the person you are now. Now you know who you are."

Zuko looked at Katara in wonder. She ducked her head, and he could hear her take a breath before she looked back at him. "I was wrong about you," she said. Zuko tensed; she seemed to be echoing the last words she'd spoken to him at Ba Sing Se. But then she explained quietly, "You're a good person, Zuko. I'm sor–" She shuddered, wiping away a fresh wave of tears.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry … the way I've been acting lately …" Katara sobbed, finally letting herself cry. She no longer cared whether Zuko saw her cry; he had already seen her at her weakest, and at her strongest.

Zuko shifted his legs so he was kneeling next to her, and put his arms around her, holding her close. To his relief, she didn't push him away, but leaned into him. Her tears soaked his black shirt, and he could feel her clutching the fabric in her fist. She still whimpered apologies, but Zuko hushed her. "It's okay," he murmured. "There's nothing that I blame you for."

Katara wished she had been that willing to forgive. "Toph was right," she wept. "I was just so angry—at you, a-and at myself. I was afraid of getting hurt again … but lately I've been hurting myself, more than you have."

Zuko could feel tears stinging his own eyes. He wasn't sure what had caused them, talking about his mother, or comforting this girl in her pain. This trip had been his attempt to remedy two kinds of pain she'd been feeling—or still was feeling—grief for her mother, and betrayal from him.

"It used to hurt to be away from you, and now it hurt to have you around all the time. It just reminded me of how … you're just like us. You're one of us. And I … I couldn't stop myself from caring about what happened to you."

So he had been right, at least partly. "Because I'm an ally?"

Katara shook her head against him. "Because you're my friend."

Zuko took a long, deep breath, resting his chin on top of her head. His chest felt light and heavy at the same time. He recognized this feeling. He had felt it before, with Katara. He knew it was love.

He didn't want to kiss or flirt with her. He just wanted to keep holding her like this, to comfort her any way he could, to be with her through both of their suffering. Hugging her body against him, Zuko felt only love for Katara.

She was still talking. "Before you joined us, I think part of the reason I was so upset was … I didn't think you knowing me had made any difference."

"Katara, it made _a lot_ of difference. I thought about you so much, after I came home. You were part of the reason I left to join you guys. You were the first person who tried to show me what this war was doing to people."

Katara closed her eyes, simultaneously needing and not wanting to hear such words. _"You mustn't think that nothing has changed. You've helped Zuko, more than you know_._" _Iroh had been right after all. And from the way he was talking, it sounded as if she had mattered to him, even when they were apart.

"I'm glad you came … that you found us again."

Zuko smiled. "It might have been the first time I actually found what I was looking for. Uncle Iroh says sometimes it's better to find something you weren't actually seeking out."

"Like how I found Aang in the iceberg," Katara said. "And you in Ba Sing Se."

They stayed together for a long time, holding each other, trading strength to bear the pain that each of them felt. Katara remembered the first time Zuko had held her, and realized that his arms still felt safe to her. She'd forgotten how good it felt, how easy it was, to trust him.

Zuko could feel her breathing slow, her body finally giving in to the exhaustion of the past few days. He gently pushed her off him. "You should get some sleep. I'll keep watch."

Katara actually looked disappointed to leave his side. Zuko hugged her once more. "It'll be okay," he whispered.

She believed him. She nodded, and then crawled over to their pile of supplies. Zuko pretended to busy himself with rearranging the fire, while she unrolled her fur sleeping bag on the other side of the cave.

"Zuko?" He looked at her again, sitting up halfway in her sleeping bag. "I forgive you." She knew that he knew, but she had still wanted to say it, so that there was no doubt.

"I know," Zuko acknowledged, and then added humbly, "Thank you."

"No. Thank you." She managed a small, tired smile, before lying down and turning on her side, facing away from him.

The rain subsided enough for him to see the last rays of daylight, but Zuko stayed awake for a long time after night fell. He had a lot to think about, all of it to do with Katara.

He remembered the first time they kissed. They had done it to show the things they couldn't say. It had been a brush against a conversation about possibilities that they couldn't—shouldn't—have considered.

The circumstances were different now. They weren't on opposing sides anymore. But the war still played a role in their lives and their relationship.

Zuko wondered how he would feel when they eventually went separate ways—if they were lucky enough to get to that point. If they both survived the battle that they knew would come soon enough.

He had promised that everything would be all right. He was confident in his ability to honor that vow; after all, he had placed his hope in Aang and their mutual allies. But objectively, he wondered if it had been a mistake to promise something like that in their unstable world. Anything could happen in a war. Either of them could lose someone they cared about … and either one of them could be hurt, or killed.

What if he survived, but Katara died?

Zuko suddenly felt cold in a way that had nothing to do with the damp weather; it was a chill that reached his heart as well as his skin. He kept glancing at the sleeping waterbender, reassuring himself. It was easier than it had been when he watched over an unconscious Iroh; Katara was young, and healthy, and, at this moment, completely alive.

He had an idea of how he would feel if she died. If it was anyone else on Team Avatar, he would feel sorrow; but if it was Katara, he would finally know how true grief felt.

He was already in too deep. He had cared about her too much, for too long, so that now it would hurt him if she died.

_She's not yours to lose._

_ Yes, she is. She's my friend._

_ She's Aang's friend, too. And Sokka's sister. And Hakoda's daughter._

Would they understand? Would Katara?

Zuko shook his head. This was exactly what he'd done after his—their—first kiss: he worried about complications, when his own emotions were simpler. He loved Katara, and there was nothing he could do to change that fact. The question was, how would that fact change them?

When she was almost asleep, Katara heard the soft rustle of fabric and footsteps on the dirt floor. A moment later she felt Zuko brush her hair out of her face and plant a gentle kiss on her cheek. Her heart seized up, the way it did at times when she awoke but couldn't decide whether or not to stir. Now, she remained still, though her heart pounded.

Zuko crawled back to his place by the fire. He didn't see Katara open her eyes slightly, a sad, confused, and tired expression on her face. Then she closed them again, resigning herself, for now, to sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Notes<strong>

Artwork: "Zutara Month: Affliction" by Vindictev

Fun Fact: I named one chapter "Confession" and another "Reconciliation," two names for the same Catholic sacrament (which also can be called Penance).

I changed the quote for this chapter at the last minute, while reading the book of Jonah for my Old Testament class. I found it interesting when it said that God repented, and that thought process seemed to match Katara's at this point in the story.

This is one of my favorite chapters, and a part of the story that I've been wanting to post for a long time! I know many of you were hoping for a kiss and the resealing of romance. Well, this didn't seem like the right time. But, rest assured, this isn't going to be one of those stories where everything is the same until the comet comes. Trust me, there will be more changes soon! In the meantime, what do you think of this chapter? Did the pacing and conversations make sense? Reviews indicate whether I'm doing this right!

I also have some good news: yesterday I officially finished my first semester of college. Now I'm on break for a whole month, so I'll have more time to read for fun and, more importantly to you, write fan fiction!


	44. Thoughts and Words

_Published January 15, 2014_

"Thoughts and Words"

O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I!  
>Is it not monstrous that this player here,<br>But in a fiction, in a dream of passion,  
>Could force his soul so to his own conceit<br>That from her working all his visage wann'd,  
>Tears in his eyes, distraction in's aspect,<br>A broken voice, and his whole function suiting  
>With forms to his conceit? And all for nothing!<br>~ William Shakespeare, _Hamlet_, II, ii

* * *

><p>"Katara and Zuko are back!" The announcement came from Suki, the first one to spot Appa flying back to the campsite in the morning.<p>

Aang and Toph stopped their earthbending practice and ran back to the campsite. Appa landed on the cliffs a moment later, the four teammates running up to him.

"Hey guys," Toph greeted.

"It's just Zuko," Aang informed her, seeing the sole passenger come down.

Sokka's eyes searched the empty saddle. "Where is Katara?" It took a little effort to keep his voice calm.

"I dropped her off at the hiding place I picked out."

"Which is …" Suki said.

"Ember Island. My family used to go on vacations there. We have a house, but it hasn't been used in years. No one would think to look for us there."

"All right, a vacation!" Aang cheered.

Zuko frowned at him. "Not for you and me. These field trips have used up a lot of our training time."

"Hey, I practiced while you were gone. And Toph's been drilling me in earthbending."

Sokka interrupted. "So what happened? Did you guys, you know, do it?"

"We found him living out his retirement. Katara made him tell the whole story. But she didn't kill him. She walked away."

Aang gave a satisfied sigh of relief. Sokka looked amazed, in a strange way. Zuko looked at the young Avatar. "You were right about what Katara needed. Violence wasn't the answer."

"It never is," Aang agreed.

He said it so simply, even happily, and using that definitive word, _never_. But if he really believed that to be true …

"Then, what are you going to do when you face my father?"

Aang's smile disappeared, replaced with a troubled expression, as though he had never thought deeply about it. Zuko shook his head. "Don't answer that now. Just think about it. We need to get going."

Aang didn't move until Toph took his hand and led him back toward the tents, which Suki started to dismantle. Sokka hung back, looking critically at Zuko. "You left Katara by herself?"

"I thought she could use some time alone," Zuko explained.

Sokka hesitated. "Did she break down, or anything? You know—cry, even if it was just to get it all out?"

"Kind of … but only after we'd talked and shared our dark pasts." Actually, she had cried after learning about his own mother, and when they finally talked about _them_, their complex and angst-ridden relationship. Now, he wondered … Had she cried over him rather than her mother? Of course, she had probably shed more tears for her mother, in the years after her death.

"So … what's your status?" Sokka asked, interrupting Zuko's speculation.

"What do you mean?"

"Are you guys … okay?"

Zuko actually smiled. "Yeah, we're good now. It's safe to say we're friends."

"Oh. Good." Sokka actually smiled slightly as he started back toward his tent.

Zuko found himself following the younger warrior. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

Sokka hesitated, only because the last thing Zuko had asked him about was his mother's death. But then he complied, "Sure."

"You and Suki are a couple, but you're also, you know, allies—or teammates … how do you make that work?"

Sokka stopped, and looked at him. "Are you asking for dating advice?"

"No." Sokka folded his arms, unconvinced. Zuko sighed. "Maybe. Or just friendship advice."

Sokka looked deep in thought. He remembered meeting Suki, and not taking her seriously as a warrior, and asking for her pardon later on. He thought of how they had worked to help and protect each other, each in their own time.

After a moment Sokka resumed walking. "Respect," he said finally. "And interdependence. And a little forgiveness, too."

Zuko turned those words over in his mind. _Respect_. Long ago he had admitted that he respected Katara, before he admitted that he cared for her. _Interdependence_. They had helped each other at different times, and they had worked together during their last mission. _Forgiveness_. He they had finally built that bridge just last night.

"Humility, too," Sokka said suddenly. "I didn't take her seriously at first, but she turned out to be a better warrior than me. I had to let go of my pride before we could see eye to eye."

There was something Zuko sometimes struggled with. There had been a time when he tried to hide behind his pride, though Katara had seen through it. And most recently Katara had stubbornly held her pride, until she let it crumble down the previous night.

It took courage and humility to love someone, to hold down your ego and bare your soul. That's what the confession of love really was, exposing yourself—figuratively, of course—to the judgment of another person whose opinion mattered to you.

* * *

><p>They arrived at Ember Island around midday. "Wow, this place is beautiful," Suki said, marveling at the bison's-eye view.<p>

"Is it actually made of embers?" Toph asked. She was half serious.

"No," Aang answered, "it has sandy beaches and some rocks and cliffs, and there are houses."

"There's a whole town, too," Zuko informed them. "We can get food and supplies there."

"We'll have to get you a Fire Nation civilian disguise," Sokka told Suki as they landed in front of Zuko's family's house.

Within minutes the teenagers were running through the building, scouting out the old rooms. "They're pretty much all empty. You guys can pick out where you want to sleep," Zuko said.

"Can I make an earth tent in the courtyard?"

"Sure, just flatten it out during the day. We'll probably use that space for training."

"Got it."

Zuko called down the corridor. "Katara?"

"I'm up here!" Katara's voice was somewhat distant—she was on the upper floor.

Zuko went up the stairs to the attic, lowering his voice as he came closer. "We're back. I think Sokka wants to see you—" He stopped at the doorway.

Katara was on her knees among the piles of belongings, though some of the piles had been taken apart and their items scattered on the floor. Katara turned toward him, and he saw that she had changed into Fire Nation clothes, something he'd never seen her wear before. It showed more skin, leaving her midriff and her right shoulder exposed. It wasn't a bad look for her …

They both blushed, Zuko because he realized he was staring, and Katara because she felt as though she'd been caught doing something wrong. She was looking through his family's history, after all.

"What are you doing here?" His tone wasn't accusatory.

"I came up to look for cooking pots … I swear I wasn't snooping, I just …"

She trailed off as Zuko looked past her at the pile of old belongings. He walked over and knelt down, picking out an old portrait. He smiled. "I tried to burn this, last time I came here. Ty Lee saved it. She seemed to think I might still need it."

Katara leaned over to look, and was surprised by the image. It was a family of four. She recognized Fire Lord Ozai from the picture Aang had brought home from the Fire Nation school; Azula was recognizable; and she could even see Zuko's resemblance to the boy in the picture, though the boy had a full ponytail and a face free of any scar. The only person she hadn't seen before was the woman behind Zuko.

"Is this your mother?"

"Yeah." Zuko put the picture down gently. "I kept a portrait of her in my room at the palace. I left it behind, but I set it up in a sort of memorial in my room." It had been a sort of final stand—besides standing up to Ozai—a way of showing that his love and loyalty still lay with his mother, rather than his father. Zuko wondered if they had discovered it, or even destroyed it. His bedroom had probably been turned inside out, and then made up like an empty guest room.

"She looks lovely."

"Yeah. She was." He used the past tense, as though he believed that she was no more.

Katara looked at Zuko. "When all of this is over—I'll help you look for her."

Zuko was startled. She said it so simply and sincerely, as though they were talking about plans for their next field trip. She didn't see it the way he did, as a nearly impossible task.

But then again, he had just helped her do something she'd thought impossible, finding the man who killed her own mother. This was a far more daunting task, considering they didn't know where or how to start searching. But she was so full of hope, she believed it was an attainable goal. And she wanted to help him achieve it.

"Thank you." Zuko didn't know what else to say, what words could show his gratitude for her willingness to help him.

Katara smiled. Zuko smiled back. He looked down at the picture again, and was about to look back at her when they heard Sokka yelling. "Zuko! Did you find Katara?"

Zuko turned away so his shout wouldn't be in Katara's ear. "Yeah, we're upstairs." Then he turned back and spoke in a normal tone. "We'd better get down there."

"Right. Um—will you help me with these?" She gestured to the pile of cooking utensils she'd found.

"Sure." Zuko picked up half of the pile and left the room. Katara followed him wordlessly, feeling as though they had failed to finish a moment—like there was something more they should have said, or done.

She could have kissed him, then, while they were alone … Katara blushed at the thought. She probably wouldn't have been thinking that way, if it weren't for the fact that he had kissed her the night before. Katara hadn't bothered herself about it, not only because she'd been so close to sleep, but also because it had felt nice, and somehow, right.

It hadn't been a romantic kiss. Not really. It had been … affectionate, she supposed. Yes. It was a gentle kiss, like the one she had given Jet, or the kind that she might give Aang or Toph or a young child.

He had waited until he thought she was asleep. Why? They'd held each other for a long time, he hugged her before she went to sleep, he could have kissed her then. Had he thought that would be inappropriate? Even just a kiss on the cheek?

Why was she even speculating over this?

Katara answered her own question immediately: _Because it matters_.

It mattered to her, how he felt about her … and that was right, because they were friends … or something like that.

They used to dance in the gray area between enemies and friends; now it seemed they had moved into the gray space between friends and … lovers, she supposed.

Katara remembered trying to describe it to Toph. _"I couldn't love him until I trusted him enough to not be afraid of him."_

She trusted him now. She wasn't afraid of him anymore, for her sake or for the team's. That meant she was free to love him, if she so chose.

Part of her had always loved him. Hadn't she hinted at that, when she told him how much she had been hurting lately? She had said that she cared about him, and that was the foundation of love.

_"I can't control my feelings, but I can control how I act on them."_

There were two ways to love someone, then: in thoughts, and in actions. Feelings could be involuntary, but one had to make a conscious decision whether to accept or reject them, and whether to let them affect one's actions. That was what she needed to decide.

* * *

><p>The feeling of sand still made Toph think of the Si Wong Desert, but the ocean breeze and the sound of the surf reassured her that there was water nearby.<p>

Sand and an excess of water were two things that rendered her truly blind. But sand was a form of earth, and Toph was determined to master it as well.

She plopped down on the beach and dug her feet into the sand. She was slightly surprised to find that underneath the fine, warm sand there was a layer of cooler, firmer sand. This layer hadn't been baked in the sun; maybe it was moister?

For a while Toph played idly in the sand, the way she had when she was a toddler in a sandbox. She grasped a handful of sand, and squeezed until most of it had fallen through her fingers. She dropped or poured sand from one hand into the other, back and forth, spilling a little with each transfer. Then she scooped up some of the firmer sand and mixed it with the finer, flexing her hand around it.

Toph stood to stretch her legs, and found herself walking down the slope of the beach, in the general direction of the water. The sand surprised her again: the top layer became smooth, flat and hard-packed, for a few yards. A wreath of shells and seaweed lined the shore, which now felt wet under her feet. Then came something strange: the sand was still firm, but here it was set in a wavy pattern, like rows of tiny hills and valleys. Toph wondered if the ocean waves had made this design.

She didn't pick up any vibrations until her friend was just two yards away. "Hey," Aang greeted. He looked out over the water. "Great beach, huh?" It was a step up from most of the volcanic islands they had visited in the Fire Nation.

"Yeah." Toph heard a slight splash as Aang crossed the sea strand into the water.

"It's low tide now, even more shallow than usual," Aang said, as though he could sense her wavering. She followed him slowly, until the water was at her calves. She could still feel the ridges of sand beneath her feet.

"The waves feel great," Aang said with relish. Toph couldn't argue that. It still seemed strange to her, feeling movement from something that wasn't alive. But then again, she had felt earth move before; fire could grow, or shrink, or spread; and at this moment she could feel the air around her moving as wind. All the elements were nonliving but essential to life, so much that they seemed to almost emulate it.

"Yeah," Toph agreed, feeling one wave after another brush past them. "It's like you can feel the whole world breathing."

Aang looked at her in wonder. "That's what Huu said when we met him in the swamp." Would coincidences never cease? Or was it something more than coincidences—a touch of destiny? Had Huu known that Toph would know that?

Aang gave up trying to puzzle it out. He looked out at the water, taking in the beauty of the sunlight on the waves. He wanted to describe it to Toph but he wasn't sure what use to words. How could he explain _sparkle_ or _shimmer_ to a blind person? Could she understand or imagine a horizon?

"Are you going to swim?" Toph asked casually.

"Oh! Yeah. Actually, I was thinking … this is the perfect place for you to master swimming."

"Mm, I don't know … I was actually thinking about focusing on my sandbending while we're here."

"Why are you so reluctant?"

"Why are you so persistent?"

"You should know why. Remember when you started teaching me earthbending?"

Toph snorted softly. "How could I forget?"

"You wouldn't give up on me, because you knew I could do it. And I'm not giving up on you, because I know you can do this."

Toph grimaced. She appreciated his confidence in her—something her parents had never shown—but for once it seemed misplaced.

"You don't have to be scared," Aang said, trying to sound both gentle and coaxing.

"I'm not _scared_, I'm just frustrated. I don't like not being good at something."

"Well, no one's good at everything."

Toph heaved a sigh. "All right, maybe I am scared. But not of drowning."

"Of what, then?"

"I'm scared that they're right," she confessed.

Aang blinked at her. "Who? Your parents?"

"When I'm in the water, I actually feel blind, and helpless. I hate feeling that way. And I hate being scared."

"It's okay to be scared. It makes us human. When I met with Guru Pathik, the first thing he had me meditate on was my own fear. Because admitting your fear is the first and hardest step in overcoming it."

Toph considered this. She knew if she didn't keep trying, she'd spend the rest of her life knowing that she had never accomplished this skill. "You really believe in me?"

"If I could learn to stand my ground, you can learn to swim in water."

"Okay," Toph relented. "If you're so determined to help me, I'll try."

They left most of their clothes on the sand and then reentered the water, moving deeper than before. "I have an idea for something that might help." Aang held his hands out palms-down, and froze a sheet of ice a few feet long and about an inch thick. It bobbed on the water's surface. "Ice floats. You can hold on to this while you learn to float."

Toph actually let out a laugh. "I think you just had your first Sokka moment!"

"What, the rest of us can't have good ideas? Come on, try it."

Toph tried a few different ways to use the ice board. She held on with her arms across it, kicking her legs to swim forward. She floated on top of it, first on her stomach, and then on her back, trying to keep her balance on it. Aang could tell that Toph was actually enjoying moving freely in the water.

The ice melted in less than an hour, enough time that Toph felt confident enough to attempt floating on her own. But when she tried, she ended up sinking and floundering in the water until she found her footing.

"Do you want me to support you?" Aang offered, slightly hesitant.

"Yes."

If Aang was surprised, he didn't show it. Toph arched backwards, and Aang held her with his arms under her back. It was reassuring, to feel his hands holding her up. "Just see if you can put more weight on the water than on my arms. Spread yourself out …"

"Guys!" Aang looked at the beach and saw Zuko standing there, watching them. "If you're done fooling around," Zuko said, folding his arms, "Aang and I need to train."

"Aw." Aang's expression was pleading. "Five more minutes? She's really close!"

"You can let go now," Toph informed him quietly.

"Huh?" Her choice of words startled him, and his hands slipped out from under her stomach; Toph instantly sank, dunking herself in the water before she found her footing and stood up. "Sorry!" Aang said when she broke the surface.

Toph spat seawater out of her mouth, spraying some of it on him. "S'okay," she muttered, shaking her head. The two preteens collected their clothes and followed Zuko back up to the beach house. "Thanks for the lesson," Toph remembered to say.

"You're welcome, any time. We can try again later."

Zuko and Aang spent the next several hours training. Katara watched them, and would have felt weird about it if Toph hadn't also been hanging out in the courtyard. The two firebenders finished just before Sokka and Suki returned from the town with surprising news.

"You guys are not going to believe this. There's a play about us."

* * *

><p>Zuko was the most reluctant to go to the Ember Island Players production. He was the only one who knew that the show would not be very entertaining, or at least not good quality. But it was a group activity, and he didn't want to be the only one skipping out.<p>

He hesitated when he saw the empty seat next to Katara. A week ago, he would have avoided sitting next to her because it wouldn't have been a pleasant arrangement for either of them. Now … well, if they were friends, he shouldn't think twice about it. He slid next to her on the bench. "Hey," he said.

She glanced at him, slightly surprised. "Hey."

Aang stood next to the bench. "Um … could you two move down a seat?" he asked Katara and Zuko.

"Sure," Katara said. Zuko frowned reluctantly but slid to the end of the bench. Katara took his seat, and Aang sat down between Katara and Toph.

"You'll have to tell me what's happening," Toph said to him.

"Okay—it's starting now." The lights in the theater dimmed then, and the play began.

At first, they were full of anticipation and excitement to see their own story told. They knew it would be surreal, but they assumed it would be in a good way.

They could not have been more mistaken.

The humor was lame, the characters one-dimensional, their personalities outrageously exaggerated. Aang was dismayed to see that his character was played by a girl. Zuko was not impressed with his counterpart, even when he said the same words he used in hushed conversation with Katara. Sokka was embarrassed by his actor's cross-dressing scene, and a little hurt by Suki's laughter next to him. Toph was the only person thoroughly enjoying herself.

Katara and the boys were startled to see that some of the actors for the pirates were, in fact, the pirates that they had fought against so many months before. Zuko instinctively put his hand over Katara's, only to pull it away. Katara glanced at him in surprise, and then smirked slightly at the how tense he'd become.

"I'll save you from the pirates," she whispered. Zuko's lip curled, as though he was fighting back a smile.

Onstage, Actor Zuko tricked Actress Katara into coming with him to hide from the pirates. They exited the stage just as Actor Sokka and Actress Aang got away from the pirates during a poorly choreographed battle. "Prince Zuko captured Katara," Actress Aang said in amazement, over-emphasizing each word.

"Hmph! Nice try, Avatar. I'm not falling for your pranks anymore."

"It's not a prank! Katara's gone."

"Seriously? Then we have to rescue her!" Actor Sokka sounded hysterical. "Zuko's so desperate for honor, he'll probably steal hers!"

Suki let out a single, involuntary laugh. Sokka's mouth dropped open, aghast, completely disgusted by their attempt at humor. Zuko and Katara both sank lower in their seats.

Things got worse as the actors played out Zuko seducing his prisoner with promises of love, waterbending lessons, diplomatic immunity, and even a royal wedding.

"You can baby-sit the Avatar, _or_ join me on my quest. Every prince needs a princess, Katara." Actor Zuko got down on one knee, holding her hand in both of his. "Will you be mine?"

"Oh, Zuko, how can I say no?"

It was all Toph could do to muffle her constant laughter. Katara sank lower and lower in her seat, wishing she had a hood like Zuko.

"Say no, Katara!" Actress Aang's voice trilled. A moment later she "flew" out over the audience, holding on to the tiny glider that was more like a decorative fan. She landed on the ship scenery and reached for Actress Katara.

"Don't leave me, Katara!" Actor Zuko cried, trying to hold her back.

"I'm sorry, Zuko. I must follow the path my heart dictates. But we'll meet again. At least I can leave you with a gift. Hope!" With that Actress Katara kissed her stage lover and then took Actress Aang's hand, and both of them "flew" away.

Actor Zuko shook a fist at them, crying, "Curse you Avatar Aang!"

* * *

><p>"So, how much of that actually happened that way?" Suki asked during the intermission. She had only been in one brief scene, when the group visited Kyoshi Island. She didn't know how what else was based on fact.<p>

"The events were mostly the same, but they didn't happen like that!" Katara insisted.

"I'm not so sure. You guys didn't feel their hearts speed up during the pirate scene," Toph said smugly.

"Toph," Zuko cut in, "some of those people onstage were the actual pirates we saw. The ones who fought us, and tried to assassinate me a month later. If they recognize us, we'll be in big trouble."

"I don't think there's any chance that'll happen," Katara said soothingly.

"I'm kind of annoyed by the Blue Spirit discrepancy."

"Isn't it a good thing, that they didn't make that connection? It means your secret's safe."

"It wouldn't make much difference. I'm already a fugitive," Zuko said ruefully.

Sokka came back laden with snacks and grievances. It was strange, but complaining was almost like bonding for the group.

"I think we're all looking at this the wrong way," Katara said finally. Everyone looked at her in surprise as she continued, "We could be more reflective about the story. This play shows how much we've done, how far we've come, in less than one year."

"You're right," Toph agreed. "Like, how you and Zuko were enemies, then love interests, then enemies, almost friends, then enemies, and now friends again."

Zuko's skin almost matched the color of his scar and hood. Katara grit her teeth. "If we weren't in public, you would be soaked right now."

Toph's smile didn't lessen. "Listen, friends. It's obvious that the playwright did his research. I know it must hurt, but what you're seeing up there on that stage is the truth."

"Maybe from one point of view," Zuko muttered as they went back inside.

* * *

><p>Everyone felt tense toward the end of the second act. They were approaching the lowest point in their story, the part when Suki was imprisoned, the Earth Kingdom fell, and Aang nearly died. It was the lowest point for all of them—though it was hard to say who went lower, Aang or Zuko.<p>

Zuko would have argued that he was the worst, because he had been deliberate in the mistakes he made. He thought about leaving so he wouldn't have to see himself betray Katara and Iroh.

Katara was embarrassed that the script included her mistake, betraying Zuko and Iroh's location to Azula. This was Actor Zuko's reason for being so angry with her stage counterpart.

"I thought you loved me enough to forgive me," Actress Katara wept.

"I don't love you," Actor Zuko spat. "I never loved you!"

Zuko's mouth dropped open just slightly. Katara looked startled, and a little bit disturbed.

"I couldn't care less about you!" Actor Zuko concluded.

"Well, I must care about you, because I hate you!" Actress Katara spat.

Sokka looked nonplussed. "That doesn't even make sense," he muttered.

"Yes it does," Suki whispered back.

Zuko wanted to turn around and glare at them. But then Katara touched his hand, and he glanced sideways to meet her eyes. She wasn't trying to reassure him. She was looking for reassurance.

Zuko gave it, willingly. He turned his hand over so he was holding hers, and squeezed gently. He shook his head just slightly, seeming to indicate the stage, his eyes beseeching her. Katara seemed to understand. She bowed her head slightly before turning her eyes back on the scene before them.

After a minute, their hands felt sweaty, and they released each other.

They proceeded to watch as Zuko chose between Azula and Iroh. For a moment it seemed that he was going to stand with Iroh, but then he pushed Actor Iroh to the side, exclaiming, "I hate you, Uncle. You smell, and I hate you for all time."

Katara was shocked, and turned to Zuko. "You didn't really say that, did you?"

Zuko looked away. "I might as well have," he said somberly.

Everyone cringed at the end of the act, when Azula declared the Avatar dead, and the audience below them cheered. Aang stood up immediately and stalked out of the box. The others came out more slowly, slightly dazed from reliving such a nightmarish memory.

The corridor outside their box was mostly empty. "Where did Aang go?" Katara wondered aloud.

"I'll look for him," Zuko volunteered.

"I'm going to get some fire gummies," Sokka announced. Suki followed him, leaving Toph and Katara sitting against the wall in the hallway.

"Do you think Aang's okay?" Toph asked.

Katara shrugged. "He just watched his worst defeat onstage. I imagine he's pretty upset. You would be too if people cheered at your death."

"Yeah, I guess so. But I don't get why everyone's getting so worked up about their characters. It's just a bunch of strangers misinterpreting us."

"You're different, Toph. You don't care about what other people think of you—unless they laud your talent. Your portrayal is just the way you'd like it. But for the rest of us, it's like a slap in the face."

"What is it that really bothers you? The fact that it's based on—well, facts?"

"Maybe. I guess it's like any stereotype or cliché: they're dangerous because they're based on only part of the truth." She cast a glance at Toph. "Are you really okay with the fact that your character is a man?"

"Yeah."

"But—though it pains me to admit it—part of what makes you so remarkable is that you're an adorable little girl. You go exactly against what people expect. So far the only strong females in this play are Suki and the Fire Nation girls. I've been demoted to a teary damsel in distress, and you've been made into a man with no conflicting family ties."

For the first time that evening, Toph sounded a little rueful. "I bet they changed my age and gender so they wouldn't be encouraging kids to think for themselves, let alone defy their parents."

"Yeah … and maybe so there wouldn't be any chance for Aang to find a girlfriend."

Toph frowned. "What did you say?"

"Your hearing is better than mine, Toph. You heard what I said."

"And what makes you think …"

Katara smiled a little. "I can see the signs, Toph. You and Aang are always drawn to each other. And unlike you, I can _see_ the way he looks at you."

Toph willed herself not to blush. "What of it?"

"Nothing. It's not my business, any more than my love life is yours. And I promise, I won't tell anyone about your crush if you don't make fun of mine."

"Fair enough." Toph punched her friend's arm.

"Ow!" Katara rubbed the sore spot, then got to her feet. "I'm going to take a walk. Do you want to come?"

"Nah, you go ahead." Toph remained sitting, feeling Katara's footsteps fade down the corridor. It was only a few minutes before she became bored. Finally, she stood up with a vague idea of looking for Aang and Zuko.

She wandered around the halls inside, before coming to the door that led to the ceilinged balcony overlooking the beach. It was harder to feel vibrations on the raised wooden floorboards, but she could hear Aang and Zuko's voices around the corner. As she came closer to the threshold, she could make out Aang's words.

"Look, Katara was the first friend I made after I came out of the iceberg. She's amazing. She's kind and affectionate and smart. She was so quick to be my friend, to leave her home to help me. And she's so good and fun—how could I live with her and _not_ have feelings for her?"

Toph pressed her hand over her mouth and turned on her heel, walking out of earshot of the boys.

_How __could__ he?_

Hadn't he hinted to her that he liked her? Hadn't he recognized her own hints and gestures of a love that was more than platonic? They had danced together, and taught each other bending and swimming, and had more fun together, had more in common! Didn't they?

She had always interpreted Aang's actions toward Katara as friendly, and his actions toward her as—not romantic, but—different, special. She had told herself that his relationship with Katara wasn't a big deal, that those two were more like siblings. Even though they had known each other longer, and Katara had left her home more willingly than Toph had, and Aang had seen Katara rather than Toph in trouble, and Katara had been the one to save Aang with her exceptional healing …

Aang's own words answered her question: _How could he __not__?_

The pain in her chest brought tears to her eyes, and tears only made her angrier. She wasn't some lovesick girl …

She felt Katara's footsteps as they walked towards each other from opposite directions. "Toph? What's wrong?

Toph's voice was low, stern, and choked. "Don't talk to me, Katara."

"What's the matter? Is there anything I can do—"

"You being nice will just make it worse." She pushed Katara out of the way and ran, not wanting anyone to see her cry.


	45. Words and Actions

_Published January 15, 2014. Re-posted as its own chapter on June 20, 2014._

Music: "When Words Fail" from Shrek: The Musical, "Love Will Find a Way" from _The Lion King II: Simba's Pride_

Artwork: "Taang - Can I Kiss You?" by GreenifyME, "because I know you believe it" by venetia-the-hedgehog, "A Stolen Moment" by Abayomi on DeviantArt

* * *

><p>Words and Actions<p>

Western novels reinforce the notion of an essential self by suggesting that the self which emerges from trying encounters with the world was in some sense there all along, as the basis for the actions which, from the perspective of readers, bring this self into being. The fundamental identity of characters emerges as the result of actions, of struggles with the world, but then this identity is posited as the basis, even the cause of those actions. ~ Jonathan Culler, _Literary Theory: A Very Short Introduction_

* * *

><p>Zuko had found Aang sulking on one of the porches overlooking the beach. It was probably the most private place they would find in the theater.<p>

"Aang?" It was the first time Zuko ever addressed the boy by name. "Can I talk to you?"

"I'm not in a good mood," Aang said flatly, without turning around.

"It's important," Zuko pleaded. He waited for a beat, and then said, "It's about Katara."

Now Aang turned to look at him fully, with a withered expression. "Don't tell me … You still like her?"

"Yes. I do."

He didn't seem entirely surprised, nor angry, nor annoyed. "Okay … so what?"

"So, I don't know what to do about it!" Zuko exclaimed, sounding like his usual frustrated self.

Aang looked incredulous now. "And you want _me_ to give you dating advice?"

"Just because you're Katara's best friend … and I already kind of asked Sokka, and I don't want to bother him about it again …"

Aang folded his arms, raising an eyebrow at Zuko. "You realize I'm the least experienced guy in the group, right?"

"Technically you're also the oldest, and you have the wisdom of a thousand lifetimes and all that." Aang scowled, turning his head away. Zuko sighed, and tried one more time. "Aang, I'm asking you as a friend."

He could sense Aang softening slightly at that. It was the first time either of them had acknowledged the fact that they were not only allies but actual friends. Finally, Aang sighed. "Okay. I'll try to help, but you have to talk openly to me. I never totally got what's between you guys."

"Fair enough." Zuko folded his arms and rested them on the wooden railing. Aang hoisted himself up so he was sitting on the railing, facing Zuko as best he could.

"I've been on dates with other girls, and I've known Mai and Ty Lee since we were little … but I never connected with them the way I did with Katara. She was my first real friend."

Aang took off his hat long enough to scratch his head. "You're … sure you aren't just remembering past feelings?"

"No. This is different. What I felt back then—it was like a glimpse of the future, something I couldn't even imagine. But now, it's possible for that future to be a reality. I've never known anyone else so complex and amazing and—wonderful."

Aang couldn't doubt it when he heard the reverence in Zuko's tone. "So what's the problem?"

"The problem is, I don't know where we might go from here. If I try out a romantic relationship, it could just bring us someplace worse. And with everything going on, having a—a girlfriend would make things more complicated, and none of us needs that now. But I don't want this hanging over my head, or hers, in the end …"

"Are you scared?"

"I—" Zuko's instinct was to protest, but then he realized that fear _was_ a part of what was holding him back. "Yeah. I am."

"Why? What are you scared of?"

"Besides the big stuff, like dying in battle?" They both cringed when he said that. But Zuko admitted, "That she might not feel that way for me … or that saying so might ruin our friendship now. There's a kind of … respect, I guess, in keeping a distance. I'm not talking about chastity, I mean in the way we interact and talk to each other. I don't want to end up destroying that respect."

"You mean, being able to talk like normal friends? I get that." It was one of his reasons for not coming out about his feelings for Toph.

"We struggled so much just to get to where we are now. We're finally stable. We like and respect each other, and we don't feel guilty about it. But now that she likes me as a friend … I want her to love me too." Zuko sighed. "Maybe Mai was right, and I'm just not capable of being satisfied."

"I don't think so. You're just afraid of losing what you already have. At least you appreciate it now."

Zuko wanted to say _It's not enough_, but that sounded selfish, even childish.

"So you could leave things as they are, or tell you how you feel and see how it plays out."

Zuko considered this. "I guess … I'd rather confront my feelings now, than have them haunting me for the rest of my life."

"But it's not just _your_ feelings that are involved. You need to find out how Katara feels about you. If you care about her, then you need to let her know—the sooner, the better." Aang looked off to the side. "I used to like her, but I made the mistake of not telling her."

"Really?" Zuko was surprised. He had felt some jealousy in the past, knowing that Katara had chosen to be with Aang instead of him, but he hadn't been aware of any romantic feelings between them.

"Look, Katara was the first friend I made after I came out of the iceberg. She's amazing. She's kind and affectionate and smart. She was so quick to be my friend, to leave her home and help me. And she's so good and fun—how could I live with her and _not_ have feelings for her?" Zuko's frown deepened, hearing Aang praise Katara—he agreed and sympathized with what he was saying, but he didn't like thinking about Aang being with the girl he loved. But then Aang finished, "I let her go when I realized she had her heart set on you."

"Really? But afterwards …"

"I could tell she still liked you that way. She just tried not to let that get in her way. And then, I met someone else who made me feel … even more than I'd felt with Katara."

Zuko blinked. "Who?"

Aang flushed pink as he muttered a single syllable. Zuko furrowed his eyebrow, and made a guess. "Toph?"

"Yes, Toph."

"Huh. I wouldn't have guessed you were a couple."

"… That's because we're not. Not really."

"Why is that?"

Aang laughed a little, though he wasn't really happy. "Where do I begin? Actually, the question is _how_ would I begin? She's not exactly the romantic type."

"So, have _you_ ever talked to her about your feelings?"

"No … but I think she might feel the same way about me."

"Then why don't you—" Zuko cut himself off. "Never mind. Thanks for listening, Aang." He clapped his student on the back and then walked away purposefully.

Zuko went back to the group's box, only to find it empty. He had to track down Sokka and Suki, who apparently had gone backstage for a while, and seen Katara going outside. Zuko went back to the entrance, wondering if he'd have to comb the beach for her—but he stopped short. She was standing at the end of the long porch, her back to him. There she was, once more contemplating the moon and ocean, standing alone as though waiting for someone to join her. It felt like déjà vu.

_"Go to her."_

_"And do what?"_

_"Talk to her."_

_"What am I supposed to tell her?"_

_"The truth. Let her know how you feel."_

_"Easier said than done, Uncle."_

_"True enough."_

Zuko knew it was probably selfish to pursue a love interest when they should be focused on preparing for their final battle. He knew it wasn't the right time; but he knew, too, that it might be the only time.

_I need to __know_, Zuko thought. It was certainty that they both needed, for better or for worse.

He walked over to her, making a reasonable amount of noise on the wooden floorboards so she was aware of him coming. Katara turned and saw him approach, pulling his hood back. "Hey," he greeted her.

"Hey," she returned.

"Are you okay?" Zuko asked.

"Sure. I—why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know. You're by yourself …"

"Well, for a while I was looking for everyone else. Actually, I passed Toph just a few minutes ago, and she seemed pretty upset, but she didn't want to talk about it."

"Well, I think Aang was going to talk to her now. I'm sure she'll be alright."

Katara looked sideways at him. "How about you? Are you okay? You seemed pretty down watching the Ba Sing Se episode," she said sympathetically.

"Yeah. I was. Guess I still am." Zuko turned and leaned his folded arms on the wooden railing. "One of the last things I said to my father was that Iroh was more of a father to me than he'd ever been. Ever since Lu Ten died … and especially since I was banished … my uncle's treated me like his own son. He taught me so much. And I repaid him with a knife in his back. I hoped to make it up to him by freeing him after the eclipse. But you know that didn't work out."

He heard Katara step closer, and felt her hand on his shoulder. "You'll see him again. I know it."

"And if I do? Can a verbal apology even cover that kind of thing?" It hadn't been enough for her.

"You're already doing a lot to make up for it," Katara pointed out. "I mean, you're helping us. That's what he wanted for you."

Zuko was silent for a moment, before he spoke again, his words hesitant and careful. "Uncle Iroh was the first person who tried to help me … but you were the second," he said, glancing at Katara.

She reacted slowly, taking her hand away, her expression cautious. "How do you mean?"

Zuko turned to look at her directly. "Where do I begin? You used waterbending to keep the ship steady during the storm. You offered me advice alongside my uncle. You healed me when I burned myself trying to make lightning. You offered me your friendship—"

"That was kind of unintentional," Katara said, hugging herself in embarrassment. "I was just trying to be nice, because Iroh suggested it."

"You were intentional when you offered to go with Zhao to protect my track record. Katara, the last person to do something that drastic for my sake was my mother."

"It didn't even work," Katara muttered. "Zhao still had it in for you, until the very end. And you were branded a traitor for helping the Water Tribe."

Zuko went on doggedly. "You healed my uncle, even after I yelled and shot fire at you. You should have been scared of me—both then, and a million times before—but you kept coming back and helping me. And you still are."

There it was again, that wary confusion in her eyes. "What do you mean?"

"Today, you offered to help me find my mother. That day Azula attacked the Air Temple, you caught me when I fell off the airship. And after we saw Yon Rha … you listened while I told you my story. And you offered your friendship again. And that's when I realized …" He hesitated, his old self-doubt coming back to him. Was _I love you_ too forward, even now? Would she believe him?

At the silence, Katara held up a hand, to his slight dismay. "Zuko, stop. I know where you're going with this, but I—"

"Please, just hear me out," Zuko begged, taking a step closer. "We've never actually been able to talk about this. I don't want to put you on the spot, but I … I need to get this off my chest. Because I may not have another chance."

Katara looked at him for a long moment, and then nodded in assent. "Okay. But don't just tell me about all the ways we're indebted to each other. Because real relationships—friendship and love—aren't about owing; they're about giving, without any thought for yourself. And I think I know how you felt about me in the past. I need to know how you feel about me now."

Zuko blinked at her. "_You_ need to know?" Katara nodded. Zuko wondered if she was having the same dilemma, not knowing how he felt toward her. Maybe they both needed to be more clear.

"Alright, then, forget what's already happened. Forget whatever we've done to help or hurt each other. Here's what I know about you now." Zuko took a breath, looking at her with long-stifled passion in his eyes. "You are the most kind, powerful, generous, beautiful, tenacious girl I know. I admire everything about you—what you do, what you are, what you want. And I know what you want for the world. So what I need to know … is what you want for yourself."

Katara understood. He wanted to know if she loved him with her thoughts and feelings, and whether she could love him with her actions too. She smiled then. "It's not as complicated as you think. I feel the same way."

She said it so simply, so calmly, that it took a moment for Zuko to recognize it as what he had been hoping she would say. "You do?" Katara nodded. Zuko was amazed, and more than a little incredulous. "Can … can you still love me? After everything I've done?"

"I can," she confirmed, and then admitted, "and I do."

Was he understanding her correctly? Had she just admitted that she loved him? "I didn't think this was possible …"

"Why? Because we've always been at odds?"

"Not just that, but because … well, just recently … you hated me."

"I never hated you," she said. Zuko looked genuinely surprised by this. Katara blushed, looking down and hugging herself. "At least, it was never as simple as feeling hatred for you. What I really hated was … not knowing who you were. Thinking that I didn't know you at all. But now I do."

"So who am I?"

She didn't respond right away. Instead, she unfolded her arms, reached up and touched his scar. Zuko had to remind himself to breathe; the gesture brought him back to the last time she'd touched that spot, when they were in the catacombs. He wondered if they had ever really left that crossroads.

"I know you don't care for it," Katara said, "but this scar says a lot about who you are. You are ethical, idealistic, noble, earnest, passionate, intense, and—I might as well say it—honorable. You're powerful in more ways than you know, and you want to use your power for good. You make mistakes and try to make up for them. And you never, ever give up on what's right and worthwhile."

"I guess that's another thing we have in common," he murmured, putting his own hand over hers. They were touching, already standing close—and then somehow they were kissing.

Zuko had the feeling that this was the moment he'd been hoping for, without realizing it, for the past several weeks. Last night had been only part of it. He had needed that reconciliation. But he had also wanted this union.

It was Zuko who pulled away first, still keeping his hands cupped around her face. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

"I don't mean sure of your feelings; I mean—are you sure you want to be with me that way?" He let one of his hands fall down from her face and rest on her bare shoulder. "I've spent so long believing we can't be together that … I'm not sure I know how to be with you, if we were a couple." He knew how to harbor feelings, how to push them down on one's list of priorities. Did he even know how to be a good partner, or whatever he was suggesting he become? The words "girlfriend" and "boyfriend" seemed almost childish, too casual for something as serious and profound as this. The word "lovers" had an illicit connotation and seemed to suggest insincerity, a more animal desire. Either label felt like an objectification of their feelings, of each other.

"Listen." Katara took his hand in both of hers, looking at him earnestly. "Ever since I was on your ship, all we've done is come up with reasons why we shouldn't be together. Now, all those things don't matter. Nothing stands in our way now," she almost whispered, smiling with hushed excitement. "We're together, we're on the same side, we have time, and we're in the perfect place to give us a chance."

Zuko realized she was right. "Then … we should make the most of the time we have here," Zuko decided, thinking aloud.

"I'd like that … spending time with you."

He could see opening up a whole world of possibility, which he had always been afraid of looking into. Could he overcome that fear—now, or in the future? He couldn't even be sure if both of them would have a future … much less one that they could share. But the hope that they could …

Katara looked at him curiously. "Are you crying?"

He touched his right eye, and found that there were tears coming out of it. "I just …" Zuko shook his head. "I've never been so … so pleasantly surprised." The idea—the _fact—_that she not only forgave him, accepted him, and respected him, but loved him as well, made him happy in a way he'd never felt before. It was overwhelming.

Katara grinned and hugged him around the middle. Zuko put his arms around her, holding her against him. "Thank you," he murmured. He told himself it was the last time he would voice his gratitude; from now on, he would show it rather than say it.

* * *

><p><em>Am I a hypocrite?<em>

That was all Aang could wonder, after advising Zuko to make his feelings known, when he couldn't do the same for the girl he loved. But wasn't his more excusable, considering how young he and Toph were? He couldn't know for sure.

But what if the same thing that had happened with Katara played out with Toph? What if he waited too long, and she found someone else, or simply lost any interest she had in him? What if he lost her? There were various ways that could happen. She could quite possibly leave him for good after the war was over. Not that they would never see each other again—their friendship was stronger than that—but he didn't think he could be totally happy without her.

With this in mind, Aang decided he wouldn't talk about feelings yet. He would just ask her what she thought she would do after they won the war. That would be easy to segue into, after talking about this play and the way it summed up their shared pasts.

Aang steeled himself, as though walking into an arena—just as he had when he first met Toph. Then he ducked back into the group's box. Suki and Sokka had returned with their snacks. Toph was sitting by herself on the frontmost bench. "Toph? Can we talk?"

"No."

"See I—what?"

"No, I don't want to talk," Toph said shortly.

"Well—I'm afraid we might not get another chance."

"Fine, then talk yourself. I don't have to answer."

"Can we take this outside?"

Toph raised her eyebrows, thinking it sounded like he wanted to fight, though that probably wasn't at all what he wanted. It might be satisfying on her part, though.

She followed him out into the hall, but there were other people milling about, so he went further, back to the porch where she had heard him with Zuko.

He knew he'd had a plan but couldn't remember how it began. "I'm not really sure how to start …"

"What, did you not cover everything with Zuko? Do you need a girl's perspective now? I guess that's all I am, someone to practice with."

Aang blinked at her, thoroughly confused. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about Katara, and the fact that she's innocently in the dark. Why don't you talk _to_ her instead of _about_ her?"

"Huh?"

"I heard you talking to Zuko about her just now."

Aang's eyes widened, and for a moment he panicked. "What? How much did you hear?"

"You said you had _feelings_ for her," Toph accused.

Of all the things she could have heard … "I was saying that I _used to_! And if you'd kept listening, you would have heard me say I gave up on her."

Toph's hands were balled into fists, her feet planted firmly against the wood floor. It was like the their first earthbending lesson, except now she wasn't scolding him, she was standing her own ground to confront him. "You think I don't notice these things? I may be blind, but I still see things! I see the way you and Katara get along. I meant what I said at the invasion, and you didn't deny it!"

"Well, I can't deny that Katara's a great friend, but that's as far as it goes!"

"You kissed my cheek before you left to fight that day. Was that some kind of consolation? An apology?"

"I told you it was a good-bye!" Aang burst out. "But actually, what I wanted that day was—" He broke off.

"What? Go on," Toph egged on.

"I wanted to give you a real kiss. Because I knew I might not make it back, and—and I wanted you to know that I like you as more than a friend."

That took her aback. Toph's anger ebbed, even as her mind swirled in confusion. "You did? You do?"

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you just say so?"

"Probably the same reason you wouldn't—I didn't know how to talk about it."

"So … why didn't you kiss me, if you wanted to?" Toph could hardly get the words out.

"Um … you were throwing up in the submarine. I didn't think you'd be in the mood."

Toph made a face, remembering. "Okay, fair enough."

Aang took off the hat covering his arrow, agitatedly crushing it in his hand. "I'm sorry. I didn't come out here to argue with you. I didn't even plan to talk about feelings."

"Then what did you want to talk about?"

Aang took a breath. "I wanted to ask―well, actually I already asked about it, but this time I wanted to _suggest―_"

"Just spit it out!"

"Will you stay with me after the war's over?"

This brought a surprised frown to Toph's face. Aang rambled on, "I don't know how you feel about me, or about being with me. But even when my training's done, and even when we don't have an enemy to fight … I don't want to lose you."

Toph's face hardened. He really thought she would leave him that easily? "Do you know why I ran away from home?"

Aang blinked. "Well … your parents were overprotective, and you wanted the freedom to be yourself."

Toph paused. "Okay, yeah. But that was only part of it."

"Then … you wanted to help end the war?"

"Oh, quit acting so modest," Toph said impatiently, sounding just as snappy as usual. "I left for _you_, Aang. And not because you're the Avatar, or because you needed my help. I went with you because you were my first friend. I didn't want to lose you, either. And I don't want to lose you now."

Aang looked at her, trying to understand what was going on in her unpredictable mind, fighting his own frustration and confusion. "Okay, back up," Aang said. "Let's get some things straight. _Do_ you like me as more than a friend?"

"I don't know."

She couldn't see him grin, but she heard his voice change to a sing-song tone. "I can tell you're lying."

Toph's eyes widened. "You can?" She thought he couldn't feel vibrations as acutely as she could, such as heartbeat and breathing … then Toph realized that she had just admitted that she was lying.

"I knew it!" Aang exclaimed.

"Okay, fine. Yes. I like you. Actually, I wouldn't be lying if I said 'I love you'. I don't know how much, and I don't know that we're meant for each other—"

"That's just it, Toph. I think we _were_ meant to find each other. That's why I saw you in the Swamp, and how I knew what to look for in a teacher. I've had a crush on you ever since that first vision."

"You mean you fell in love with me before you even met me? That's deep, Aang, real deep."

"I'm not trying to be sappy, Toph. I just knew you'd be someone special," he reasoned. "And you are—to me more than to anyone else."

Toph could feel herself blushing. Her whole body was hot, and her heart felt like a live animal thumping in her chest. "So what happens now?" she said quietly.

Aang looked at her for a long moment. He thought about doing what he'd said he wanted to do in the past—he could tell she was thinking of the same thing, but he didn't know if she was hoping or simply anticipating it.

"Can I kiss you?"

She blinked in surprise. She hadn't expected him to ask. Was that standard procedure before kissing? Or was he just preparing her, since she couldn't see his face?

"I've never kissed anyone before," Toph said softy.

"Do you want to?"

"I don't know," she said. She felt embarrassed, not wanting to be too eager or too evasive. "Maybe." That wasn't helpful. "… Yes."

Aang hooked his finger under her chin, gently tilting her face upward. "I'm going to close my eyes," he said. "So I'll just see as much as you do."

Toph knew this could be the moment when everything changed. Did she want this? What if things were never the same with Aang?

No, that was impossible. Because she had been drawn to him from the very beginning. They'd always had a unique kinship.

Aang's lips pressed down gently on hers. Toph leaned in too, and grasped the fabric of his shirt, pulling him as close as she could. Aang kept his hands on her shoulders to steady himself.

Toph had never felt a person this way before. She'd touched his lips with her fingers, once, and felt his heart beat and his scars, but _this_ … she didn't want to put words to it, because that would make it sound weirder in her objective mind. So instead of thinking, she continued to feel.

When his lips broke away from hers, he rested his forehead against the crown of her head. They were both breathing quietly. "What do you think?"

"Well, it wasn't gross."

"I thought it was nice," Aang said frankly.

Toph laughed, and her smile lit up her whole face—the way it had when Aang first saw her in the Foggy Swamp. "We're both full of surprises."

"That's true." Both of them had had to contend with others' expectations of them, and come to terms with how much of those expectations were true.

Toph giggled. "I feel like a girl."

"You are a girl. Even if your actor is a boy."

Toph couldn't feel vibrations through the wooden building, and her mind was so fuzzy that she didn't hear two people turning the corner and stopping to stare at them in complete disbelief.

"Aang?"

Startled, Toph and Aang broke away at the sound of Katara's stunned voice. Toph blushed deep red. Aang looked startled as he stared back at Zuko and Katara, who looked utterly dumbfounded.

"What—Toph—how—" Katara said haltingly, at a loss for words.

"Didn't you see us coming?" Zuko broke in, surprised but coherent.

"No," Toph said, sounding surprised with herself.

"Well … um … I wanted to ask if you were okay," Katara said awkwardly. "But I guess you are."

Aang blushed furiously.

"We're fine here," Toph said evenly. "And how are you two doing tonight?"

"Oh, everything's—great for us."

Aang blinked, and then raised his eyebrows at Katara and Zuko. Toph looked similarly knowing, and would have been amused if she weren't in a the same position.

"We should probably go back to the box," Zuko murmured.

"Right. We'll see you there." Aang was still holding Toph's hand as they left.

There was a moment of silence before Zuko spoke to Katara. "Is there any privacy between people in this group?"

Katara's smile was sympathetic, almost indulgent. "I'm happy for them. And for us."

"I guess Lo and Li were right—again," Zuko said, smiling. "Ember Island really does bring people together. When I came here a month ago, I got to know Ty Lee and Mai better. When we arrived here, you and I finally made up. And tonight, I had a heart-to-heart with Aang, and Aang and Toph kissed." He paused, looking sideways at Katara.

"And now that you're on our side, I don't feel at all guilty about this." Katara put her hand on his shoulder, gently making him turn to face her, and kissed him. Zuko's amber eyes widened, but then he relaxed and kissed Katara back. She melted into him, like fire melting an ice cube.

After a moment Katara cupped Zuko's scarred face in her hands, and he put one arm around her. Their movements seemed to reflect the nature of their elements: Zuko was fiery and passionate; Katara's motions were fluid and smooth. Somehow they managed to work harmoniously. It felt deeply right.

Zuko realized that this was the first time he had kissed Katara without feeling hesitance or guilt. Now he was free to love her.

Finally they broke apart, only to hug each other tightly. "I missed you," Katara whispered, resting her head on Zuko's shoulder.

Zuko stroked her hair. "I missed you too. Even after I joined the group, I missed you."

"I'm sorry I was so … you know …" How could she describe her behavior toward him when he joined the group? She had threatened to kill him, after all. "Harsh. Icy. Hostile."

"I guess I deserved that," Zuko murmured. "Don't worry about it."

They stood in silence for a moment, just holding each other. Then Zuko said, "We really should go inside. They'll be wondering where we are."

They released each other reluctantly, but they held on to each other's hands. Katara's eyes shone as brightly as the innumerable stars in the sky. It was a beautiful summer night. The moon and the torches on the beach threw light onto the waves rolling on the shore. As they went in, Katara cast a glance back at the moon, knowing that Yue was probably smiling down on them.

* * *

><p>Everyone except for Sokka and Suki missed the first half of the final act, but no one minded. "Where've you guys been?" Sokka asked, but didn't wait to hear before filling them in on what they had missed. His own mood improved significantly when the actor portraying him took his advice and ad-libbed some jokes. "Hey Toph, would you say you and Aang have a <em>rocky<em> relationship?"

Sokka made some wordless joyful sounds, gesturing to all of them. Toph laughed at the irony, and Aang tried to make his chortle seem humorous rather than nervous.

Katara smiled at him Zuko during the part when he joined Team Avatar. He was smiling too, just slightly, but his eyes were fixed on the stage. No one could see them holding hands.

The sweetness was rudely interrupted by the play's shocking and unpleasant conclusion. Sozin's Comet came, and Azula and Ozai were shown killing off Zuko and Aang respectively. The real Zuko was shocked, not only at seeing his own death, but also at hearing the audience applaud this. Just months ago a crowd had cheered for his return, and now they were cheering for his demise—all their regard based on the whims of the Fire Lord and his propaganda-induced culture. Toph wanted to punch something when she heard the crowd cheering over Aang's death. Katara and Aang actually felt nauseous, watching fake flames engulf the stage as Ozai proclaimed, "The world—is—mine!"

The audience below them gave a standing ovation, while the six friends sat in shock. It was Toph who got up first. "Let's ditch this place."

They left the building silently, not feeling quite capable of discussing it until they were walking on the beach again. "That … wasn't a good play," Zuko said finally.

"I'll say."

"No kidding."

"Horrible."

"You said it." Even Toph no longer remotely liked the play.

"But the effects were decent," Sokka maintained.

Zuko sounded thoughtful when he spoke again. "I did say that the players were bad. And I was right about the play. But—I can't say I regret coming tonight."

Toph smiled satisfactorily. "Well, I know one thing positive came out of this. Two things, actually."

Aang, Katara and Zuko stopped in their tracks. "Toph—" Katara started.

"Come on, Sokka and Suki are the only ones who don't know."

"What?" the warriors said together.

"First, Katara and Zuko are back together!"

Sokka was taken aback. "What? Seriously?" He looked to his sister, who blushed and nodded, her smile a little sheepish. "That's … great." Sokka smiled, and Suki couldn't tell whether it was forced.

Zuko ran a hand through his hair. "Thanks a lot, Toph," he said, shooting her an annoyed look that she couldn't see.

"You're welcome," she said smugly. "And secondly—"

"Toph finally admitted how she feels about me," Aang finished for her.

Now Sokka stopped short. "Say _what_?"

Katara laughed at her brother's utter shock. "Come on, Sokka. I've suspected something for a while now. Don't tell me you couldn't see it."

"I thought that was a strong friendship!" Sokka said. "Like me and Toph, or you and Aang! And aren't you guys kind of young?"

"We're thirteen now," Aang said. "We're teenagers, just like the rest of you!"

"Crazy, hormone-filled, reckless," Zuko said under his breath.

"You know it!" Toph gave him a shove, and then turned to Aang. "Race you to the dock!" With that she took off running, kicking up an unnatural amount of sand at the them—a sign that her sandbending was improving.

"I'm in!" Sokka said.

"Hey, she was challenging me!" Aang exclaimed, joining them.

Katara exchanged a glance with Zuko. "Want to race?"

Zuko smiled crookedly. "I don't know … competition between us doesn't usually end well …"

"Your loss!" Katara called out before taking off after the others.

"Hey!" Zuko started after them too.

The six of them raced down the beach, kicking sand up behind them, splashing when they crossed the sea strand, laughing and shouting to each other. They were acting crazy, like the teenagers they all were.

"The end of the dock is the finish line!" Toph shouted, far ahead of the others.

"Okay!" Aang smiled complaisantly; then he ran so fast—as only an airbender could—that Toph couldn't register his footsteps in the sand, and the others lost sight of him in the darkness. He stood at the end of the dock a mere minute later.

Toph and Sokka ran neck-in-neck as they reached the old, disintegrating pier; they were both trying to push each other out of the way, and Sokka, as the taller one, managed to push Toph behind him. She lost her balance, and then fell with a cry off the dock and into the water.

"Toph!" Aang's first reaction was slight panic. But then Toph resurfaced, her arms were pushing her forward, and her head staying up—and then he realized, _she was moving on her own_.

"Look! I'm swimming!" She had to spit water out of her mouth as she spoke.

Aang laughed triumphantly. "She's doing it! Toph can swim!"

"Woo-hoo!" The older kids cheered from the beach. Katara was distracted enough that Zuko caught up to her, locking her in his arms and spinning her. "Ha! I've captured you!"

"Oh, have mercy!" Katara laughed. They slowed to a stop, Zuko hugging her from behind, both of them looking out at the beach.

"I've never had so much fun before," Zuko said. He hadn't stopped smiling.

"Is this what summer's like for normal kids?" Katara wondered. He knew what she was referring to: the feeling of being suspended in time, as though infinity lay before you, and yet was ready to disappear in an instant.

"No," Suki said, speaking from sixteen years of experience outside the war. "This is much better."

* * *

><p>They spent a long time on the beach before they were tired enough to go back to the beach house. "See, even thought play stank, we salvaged some fun tonight," Sokka said, maintaining a positive attitude. He wasn't the only one walking with his arm over his girlfriend's shoulder; Zuko had his arm resting lightly Katara's shoulders. Even Aang and Toph walked hand-in-hand.<p>

"Everything's going to be different now," Zuko said as he looked down the beach.

"Yeah," Katara said. "But I think things are going to change for the better."

Everyone had already picked out sleeping spots: Toph set up her earth tent in the courtyard, Katara and Suki shared an old bedroom, while the boys shared another.

Aang knelt next to Toph's earth tent. "So, um … can we spend some time training together tomorrow?"

"Sure. I'll trade you a sparring session for a swim practice."

Aang grinned. "Fair enough. G'night, Toph."

"G'night Twink … Aang."

"You can still call me Twinkle Toes if you want."

Zuko and Katara stopped outside the girls' bedroom. Zuko spoke, staving off a potentially awkward goodnight. "I'll be training Aang during the middle of each day, when the sun is highest, but we could spend the mornings and evenings together."

"That sounds great," she said, smiling sincerely.

Zuko smiled too, and kissed her forehead softly before heading to his room. Katara went into her bedroom, feeling tired yet exhilarated. She still had that vividly unreal feeling of summer and love. She flopped down backwards onto her sleeping bag, smiling and staring up at the cobwebbed ceiling.

_Can this possibly be real?_

_Don't ask. Just enjoy it._


	46. Calm Before the Storm

_Published June 1, 2014_

Acknowledgments: I want to dedicate this chapter to my two classmates who I shared my fan fiction with: E.W., a fellow fan fiction fangirl, and R.O., who read this story from beginning to end over the course of a week. Also, I thank my readers who prayed for my grandfather while he was in the hospital: he went through a really rough time but he is doing much better now!

Illustrations: "Breathe" by Nymre, "Zutara: With You…" by YoukaiYume, "calm before the storm" by soulxconspiracy, "Zutara Fluff" by Katsari-chan, "Dancing Mythology" and "Deep Stares" by FlameoZutara

Music: "Just a Kiss" by Lady Antebellum, "Don't You Wanna Stay" by Jason Aldean & Kelly Clarkson, "As Long As You're Mine" from _Wicked_

* * *

><p>"Calm Before the Storm"<p>

Then a mile of warm sea-scented beach;  
>Three fields to cross till a farm appears;<br>A tap at the pane, the quick sharp scratch  
>And blue spurt of a lighted match,<br>And a voice less loud, thro' its joys and fears,  
>Than the two hearts beating each to each!<br>~ Robert Browning, "Meeting at Night"

* * *

><p>Everyone slept late in the morning, after staying up so late during the night. Zuko started training with Aang immediately after breakfast. It was late in the afternoon when they finished and were able to join the others on the beach. Toph and Aang went off by themselves, saying they would probably practice swimming.<p>

Zuko walked up to Katara, who had stood when she saw him coming. "Hey," she greeted.

"Hey."

Katara reached out and pushed his bangs out of his face. "You need to brush your hair," she said with a rueful smile.

When she withdrew her hand, Zuko just tousled his hair again. "I thought you liked it longer," he teased. "You said you didn't like the ponytail."

"Oh, you remember?" Katara smiled sideways at him.

"I remember every conversation we've had."

"Really?"

"More or less. You did ask me, once, to remember you, so I made an effort to do so."

Katara was touched. She had almost forgotten that promise she had asked of him. Zuko smiled. "Want to walk down the beach?" Zuko suggested to Katara.

"Sure." She waved goodbye to Sokka and Suki and fell into step next to Zuko. He held on to her hand as they walked, looking out at the sea.

"I think I missed this place even before I was banished," he said. "Some of my best memories took place here. I just didn't appreciate them when they were happening. I didn't know there could be anything different."

"What was it like?"

"I don't know … the only thing that was different from now was the people I was with. My mom and Lu Ten were still with us." Speaking of Lu Ten made him remember something. "Do you know how to skip rocks?"

"Sort of. Back home I used to freeze ice discs to skip on the water. Stones are harder because they sink."

"Lu Ten tried to teach me when I was little." Zuko knelt down and picked up a flat, smooth stone. When he stood, he aimed carefully and flicked it out to the sea. It bounced three times on the waves before sinking.

"Nice," Katara said appreciatively. They continued this for a short time, with Zuko coaching her. While sifting through the sand for suitable rocks, Katara picked up some small, colorful objects. She blinked, and then squinted at her hand. "I don't think these are rocks, or shells …"

Zuko knelt next to her and picked one of the green pieces out of her palm. "It's sea glass."

"Glass?"

Zuko looked at her in surprise. "You spent most of your life on the water, and you've never seen sea glass before?"

"We didn't have glass in the South Pole. I'm not even sure what it is."

"Making glass involves melting sand … I don't really know much about it," Zuko admitted. "But I know that if you throw broken glass into the ocean, it gets tossed in the waves so much that the sand rubs against the rough edges, until it smooths them out." Zuko looked thoughtful, and then smiled slightly. "My uncle would have some symbolic lesson to give about the ocean and sea glass."

Katara smiled at him. "You know something? I think you're on your way to being just as wise as him."

"He once said that I'm stronger than him," Zuko said, remembering a day from early in his banishment.* He sighed. " I wish that were true."

"Didn't he have to go through a lot, to become the person he is now? I mean, he lost his son, and then his father so soon after that. He suffered alongside you when you were banished. You both had to learn from your mistakes. They just make you a stronger, wiser person. You're already a lot like him, more than you realize."

Zuko smiled then, a real smile of gratitude and something that might have been pride. "

"If I know my uncle, he's probably found some friend to help him out."

That made Katara remember something. "Aang's first firebending teacher was an old Fire Nation officer who was living in hiding. He mentioned Iroh once—actually, I said something about him, but even without saying Iroh's name, he knew who I was talking about, and he called Iroh an old friend."

"What was his name?"

"Jeong Jeong."

"Hm. I haven't heard of him."

"You know something else? Sokka trained with a swordsmaster who said he knew you and Iroh."

Zuko squinted, trying to remember the man's name. "Master Piandao?"

"Yes! He's the one who told me where Iroh was probably being kept. And when we left, he gave Sokka a Pai Sho tile as a gift—the White Lotus."

Zuko started. "You're kidding."

"Does it mean something?"

Zuko scratched his head. "I think so, but I don't know what exactly. When Uncle Iroh decided to go to Ba Sing Se, he got some help from someone he played Pai Sho with. It was weird. They had some secret club, and they kept talking about the White Lotus."

"Like the flower?"

"And like the Pai Sho tile. I think it was some kind of symbol … like a password." Zuko shrugged. "I don't know what it means. But it helped us get to safety."

Katara shifted so she was sitting comfortably in the sand. "Tell me more."

"About what?"

"I want to know more about you. What do you like to do? What have you done that I don't know about?"

"Okay, I'll tell you about myself if you do the same for me."

"Deal."

* * *

><p>Thus began a series of long talks. When they weren't busy training Aang, sharing meals as a group, or cleaning the long-uninhabited house, Zuko and Katara left the others behind for more private conversation. They packed picnics, scouted out the best parts of the coastline, and spent hours talking. They found that they had a lot to share about their pasts, going into detail about their adventures.<p>

Katara recounted the day she met Aang, how they met Suki and the other Kyoshi Warriors, and what she had learned about her grandmother's history in the Northern Water Tribe. Zuko grinned when she described her fight with Master Pakku. "I wish I'd been there to see it."

"But I lost."

"Still, it'd be fun to see you so tenacious—at least when it wasn't directed at me."

When it was Zuko's turn, he told her about Hong Shen, Song, Lee, and even Jin. He then told her the story of how he had assumed the Blue Spirit persona while helping an actor, and how Iroh had convinced him to leave behind the mask. "I haven't really thought about it," he said slowly. "But that was when I stopped trying to hide one nature and show another. From then on I tried to be myself, and act in whatever way I thought was best, for everyone to see." He wrinkled his nose. "Maybe it wasn't much of a change for the better."

"No, that makes sense," Katara said.

She told him about her adventure in Jang Hui, and how she had helped the people there. Zuko was genuinely surprised to hear that there were people in his own nation who were suffering. "We'll have to fix that, once the war's over," he said. Katara thrilled at the word "we."

One day, they went swimming and then dried off by lying on large, smooth rocks, soaking in the sunlight. They talked about their childhoods, the friends they had, and the activities they did for fun. The sun was setting on their side of the island.

"If you grew up in the arctic," Zuko said, "how did you learn to swim?"

"I don't know," Katara said with a shrug. "I didn't have a chance until we were in the Earth Kingdom, closer to the equator. I guess … I just knew what to do. I can't explain it."

"Probably because you're a waterbender."

"What about you? Can you remember learning to swim?"

"Not well … I think I remember swimming with Azula and Lu Ten, but I can't remember who taught me."

Zuko smiled. "Hm. Last time I was here—with Azula, Mai and Ty Lee—I said I don't have the luxury of being a normal kid. But now, I'm pleasantly surprised to find I was wrong."

"So, do you like being normal?" Katara prodded.

"I've never been happier."

"Really? Not even … you know, before your mom, and your exile?"

Zuko considered. "I was relatively happy, but now … it's like every day is a gift. I've never felt that kind of happiness before."

They lapsed into a short silence, watching the sun descend closer to the sea. Then Katara glanced at Zuko, and saw that he was staring up at the sky pensively, almost avoiding her gaze. "Is something bothering you?"

"Kind of … well, two things, I suppose." He dared to look at her. "Do I deserve this?"

Katara opened her mouth, but no sound came out. Zuko nodded. "See, even you aren't sure. I was lucky enough to get a second chance at making a difference in the war … but I don't know if I deserve this much. For the first time in my life, I have love, friends I can trust, and a place where we can be safe. and even have fun. Sometimes, I feel like it's too good to be true. Like, what if this is all a dream, and I'll wake up on my ship, or in Ba Sing Se, or in the palace?"

Instead of reassuring him, Katara leaned over and kissed him. Zuko was only surprised for a moment—he hadn't planned to kiss or even really touch while they were in their bathing suits—but he didn't resist. When she pulled away, too soon, she looked him in the eyes. "Is that real enough for you?"

He smiled, resting his hand on her jaw. "Yeah."

"Then maybe you should stop questioning all your blessings, and just be thankful for them instead."

"Even if it's real … my most rational fear is that it's all temporary. What's going to happen at Sozin's Comet? Even if we all survive this war … what's going to happen to us afterwards?"

Katara was silent for a long moment. Contemplating the long-term future was not something she did often, because they always had to focus on immediate plans.

Finally she spoke. "I'm not sure what I'll do with the rest of my life. But, Zuko, you'll always have a place with us—if you want it."

"Thank you," he said quietly. "I appreciate that." Maybe it was more than he deserved, but he was still grateful for whatever good things he received and experienced.

"You're welcome with us. And _I'll_ stay with you, if—" But she stopped. Zuko noticed how she lowered her gaze, avoiding his eyes.

"If what?"

"If you still want me then," Katara murmured.

Zuko looked at her, his eyes soft, his expression sincere. "I haven't forgotten what you said to me, the day I joined you."

Katara frowned, looking at him again. "Wha—which bit?"

"About me changing my mind. You were right that I've done that a lot. But I'm pretty sure I won't change my mind about wanting you."

She hadn't realized that she wanted to hear those words, until Zuko said them. They were sweet and sincere, and she wanted to believe them. "I won't hold my breath," she murmured.

They had been lying side by side, but now Zuko turned toward her and moved slowly closer, as though going in for a kiss. He had to put his hands on the stone on either side of her to hold himself up. Katara lay trapped, her heart pounding as he moved over her, a mere inch of space between their upper bodies. Zuko lay his head against hers, inhaling the scent of her hair, exhaling heat on the skin of her neck.

Katara closed her eyes, trying to relax, still feeling the heat and desire so close to her, even inside her. "I trust you, Zuko," she said; it was a calm assertion, and something of a warning.

"I know." He lifted his head to look at her, and she opened her eyes again. "And I swear—on my honor—I will never do anything to destroy that trust again."

It was that promise, even more than the exhilarating physical attraction, that made Katara love him more than ever. She reached up and touched his face, resting her hand on his cheek, then moving it over his scar. "I don't want to ruin this," Katara said softly.

"Neither do I."

They moved at the same time to meet in a gentle kiss. They were starting to develop a rhythm: He always kissed her slowly, sincerely, as though it were the first time, and the last time. Of course, there was always the possibility that it _was_ their last kiss; that awareness was always present in the back of his mind, but he hushed it and enjoyed each moment for everything it was worth.

Zuko broke away slowly, only to rest his head underneath hers. He could feel their hearts beating, their chests moving as they breathed. It was strange, how simply being with someone could make your heart race and drain you of energy. He wanted to fall asleep with his head on her chest, his arm resting around her middle … but he knew sleeping together would be crossing a line. It seemed like another thing reserved for a marriage bed.

It occurred to him that that was now a plausible possibility in their future.

Once again, what they were experiencing now was just a small glimpse of what could be. But this time, they could be happy knowing that their hopes could become their reality.

* * *

><p>"Can you show me some of the forms you do with Aang?" She asked him this in the morning. He was always up before her, and she found him practicing by himself on the beach.<p>

"Uh, sure. Just, um … stand facing me and mirror what I do, step by step." They stood a few feet apart, and he showed her the first pose of the Dancing Dragon. She had seen him perform it with Aang for the group, so it wasn't completely foreign to her.

"Hm. If you do it slowly, it's almost like yoga," Katara observed. They went through the form together twice, before Zuko suggested she try it on her own. She still looked to him, either for guidance or out of self-consciousness. "Am I doing this right?" She felt silly doing it on her own, standing on one leg with her arms held out, in front of her boyfriend.

Zuko came up behind her. "More like this …" He spread her arms wider, making her arms bend at the right angle. "If you need to balance better, you can do a tree pose or something."

Katara did so, moving her upheld leg from her front to her side. "Better?"

"Much."

She tried striking the next pose, but she teetered in the sand. Zuko caught her by the shoulders, both of them standing now. Katara gasped, very slightly, but he still heard it. She felt the heat of his hands increase, and could imagine him blushing. "Sorry … do you mind?"

"Not in the least," she said, touching his hand. It could have been reassurance, or permission.

Then she felt him move more deliberately, bringing his hands to the back of her neck. His hands, strong but gentle, massaged her skin, as though learning the feeling of it. They traveled past her shoulders, down her arms, until they caught each of her hands. He stood right behind her, their bodies almost alined.

Katara moved then, hugging herself and pulling his arms around her as well. Like she wanted him to hold her. Like she wanted to be his.

Zuko closed his eyes. He was still afraid to think that way. She might be his girlfriend, but that didn't make her _his_. Someday, perhaps … if they both lived long enough, and if they were able to resolve the conflict between their nations …

For now, he contented himself with feeling her in his arms, holding her as close as he could.

_I love you_. He wanted to say it—wanted to vocalize the warmth in his chest, the full feeling in his heart—but he stayed silent. If he was going to tell her, it wouldn't be during a heated or intoxicated moment. He would do it soberly, looking at her face-to-face, so she could see his sincerity and he could watch her reaction.

They stood like that for a few minutes, facing the ocean. If Toph had been observing them, she would have said they were just breathing together. Maybe that's all it was. And somehow it was enough for them, to be together in a moment of peace.

It was Zuko who finally broke the silence, turning his head just slightly to whisper into her ear. "If you want me to let go, just say the word, and I will."

He sounded as though he wasn't just talking about how he was holding her at that moment. "Another minute?" she whispered back. She heard and felt him chuckle, could sense his smugness in the way he held her.

"If you _want_ me to keep you to myself," he murmured, shifting his arms around her, "I might decide to not let you go …"

"I … _think_ I could live with that," Katara said.

"You think I'm kidding? I can be pretty selfish, if I don't stop myself."

They could hear voices rising, not from the beach house, but from some point further down the coastline. Other tourists, staying later in the summer than most. They broke apart, and by silent agreement started back to the beach house. The group had decided it was safer if Zuko stayed out of the way of tourists who might recognize him as the ex-prince.

Katara held on to Zuko's hand as they made their way back up the beach. Zuko kept stealing glances at her, then looking away in embarrassment. "I promise that won't happen on all our dates."

Katara frowned, looking at him with gentle concern. "I didn't mind it, if that's what you—"

"I know. It's just—I don't want this to turn totally physical." He hesitated, then said, "That's kind of what happened with me and Mai, after I came home."

She looked at him, studying him. "You're still afraid, aren't you? Afraid that I'll change my mind about you."

He looked at her. He didn't deny it. But a moment later he shook his head. "You know what? It doesn't matter." Zuko stopped and grasped both of her hands, holding them to his chest. "All I want is to spend as much time with you as I can, while we do have time."

* * *

><p>They met for yoga the next morning as well. This time Katara was the one leading.<p>

"I did this with Aang, before the Day of Black Sun," Katara remembered. "He was really stressed out before the invasion. He kept having nightmares, so he tried to stay awake every night, and that made him hallucinate during the day."

"Really?" Zuko looked slightly surprised. "He seems to be doing pretty well now, even though Sozin's Comet is just days away. I've been thinking I should train harder with him to prepare for that …" He stopped when he noticed Katara looking at him strangely. "What is it?"

"As far as I know," Katara said slowly, "he's not planning to fight the Fire Lord before, or when, the Comet comes."

Zuko stared at her. "What?"

"Well, he hasn't quite mastered firebending … and there's not as much at stake now. The whole point of fighting the Fire Lord before the comet was to stop the Fire Nation from winning the war, but in their eyes they've already done that."

Zuko still stared at her, before shaking his head in agitation. "This isn't good … I need to talk to Aang." He walked away abruptly. Katara watched him for a moment, puzzled, before following him.

They found Aang on the beach with Toph, giving her a swimming lesson. Katara was surprised and delighted to see her paddling in the water, by herself, keeping her head over the surface as she moved.

Aang saw them and waved them over. "Katara! Zuko! Come see!"

Toph's feet found the sand and steadied herself. "Hey, Katara! Waterbending slice!" She spun around, holding her hand downward in the water, creating an arc of falling water in a semicircle in front of her.

"GUYS!" Zuko's angry shout silenced everyone else. "We need to talk, NOW!"

Sokka and Suki were lying together on towels spread out on the sand. Sokka looked up with vague curiosity. "Is this important?"

"If you think saving the world is important," Zuko retorted.

That retort sobered everyone. The six teenagers stood in a circle, almost like a war council. "What's going on?" Aang asked, looking to his firebending teacher.

"Katara said you're not planning to do anything when Sozin's Comet comes." Zuko looked to Aang for an answer. A tense, awkward silence filled the air. The others exchanged glances. "Well? Is it true?" Zuko demanded.

"It's true," Aang said.

"_Why_?"

"Because I'm not ready," Aang replied, his eyes downcast. "I need more time to master firebending."

"And frankly, your earthbending could still use some work too," Toph put in. Aang looked disappointed at this.

"There's not as much at stake now, either," Katara put in.

Zuko could hardly believe what he was hearing. "How do you see that?"

Sokka spoke up. "As far as world domination goes, there's nothing more that the Fire Nation wants. The Water Tribes aren't strong enough to pose an offensive threat, and no one in their right mind is going to attack them after what happened to the fleet at the North Pole, so they're safe. The Earth Kingdom was the only other country that the Fire Nation threatened, and it's already fallen. Things can't get any worse."

"You're wrong." Everyone looked at Zuko in surprise. "It's about to get worse than you can even imagine."

"What are you talking about?" Suki asked, voicing what everyone else was wondering.

"The day before the eclipse, I went to a war council. It—"

"Whoa! Back up!" Zuko turned and saw Katara looking at him in disbelief. "_You_ went to a _war council_?" Zuko understood what she wasn't saying in front of the others: _After what happened last time?_

"I think … it was a kind of test. I didn't go until my father sent for me. He said he _wanted_ me there. That was all I had ever wanted. When I got to the meeting, everyone welcomed me. My father had saved me a seat. He wanted me next to him. I was literally at his right hand.

"When the meeting started, someone recommended sending more troops to quiet the unrest in the Earth Kingdom. My dad asked me for my opinion, since I've been to the Earth Kingdom and got to know people there."

"What did you tell him?" Suki asked, slightly awed.

"The truth. That the Earth Kingdom people are proud and strong." Suki and Toph looked pleased, or at least satisfied, with this answer. "Azula suggested just burning their land to the ground, to break any hope of endurance."

"Let me guess," Toph said, folding her arms. "Your dad liked that idea."

"He _loved_ it. But he wants to take it even further. He said since Sozin's Comet marked the beginning of the War, he would use it to do to the Earth Kingdom what Fire Lord Sozin did to the Air Nomads."

The others gasped. Aang was frozen in shock; for a second he saw flashes of memories from his return to the ruined Southern Air Temple … the wreckage, the bodies, the realization that so many innocents had been slaughtered … a people destroyed, a culture wiped out.

"You mean …" Katara started, but Zuko cut her off.

"He's going to lead a fleet of airships across the Earth Kingdom and burn everything in his path. And he's going to rule over the ashes … making the Fire Nation expand to the whole world."

The others stared at him with the same horror they would have had if he were telling a ghost story. It sounded just as unreal. All the places they had seen—Omashu, the Great Divide, Ba Sing Se—all the people they had met in the Earth Kingdom—could they really be destroyed? Aang was the only one who knew how completely a people could be killed.

"I wanted to speak out against this horrifying plan, but I'm ashamed to say I didn't."

Katara understood: Zuko hadn't wanted to repeat his mistake, the one that had changed his entire life.

"My whole life I struggled to gain my father's love and acceptance. But once I had it, I realized I lost myself getting there. I'd forgotten who I was."

Katara put a hand on his shoulder. He looked at her through his shaggy bangs, his eyes asking not for forgiveness, but for understanding. Katara's look told him he had both. "That was when you started to remember," she said. It was not a question. Zuko nodded.

"What am I going to do?" The question came from Aang, but no one knew to whom it was directed.

Zuko walked toward his pupil, his friend. "I know you're scared, and that you're not ready to save the world. But if you don't defeat the Fire Lord before the Comet comes, there won't be a world left to save anymore."

Aang looked utterly lost. "Why didn't you tell me about your dad's crazy plan sooner?"

"I didn't think I had to," Zuko said. "I assumed you were still going to fight him before the Comet. No one told _me_ you decided to wait."

"This is bad." Aang dropped to his knees, shaking, holding his head in his hands. "This is really, really bad."

"Calm down, Aang." Toph came and stood behind him. Aang turned his head enough to look at her. "Yes, it's bad, but panicking won't help anyone, least of all you." She hadn't forgotten about his nightmares before the Day of Black Sun.

Katara cleared her throat. "I think what she's getting at is, you don't have to do this alone."

"Yeah. If we all fight the Fire Lord together, we got a shot at taking him down."

"Alright!" The show of solidarity made Sokka excited. "Team Avatar is back! Air. Water. Earth. Fire. Fan and sword!"

Toph knelt next to Aang. "Do you trust us to help any way we can?"

"Of course I do."

Toph offered him a hand up, which he accepted. The twelve-year-old Avatar looked out at his circle of supporters. Even the pending destruction of the Earth Kingdom seemed like a problem that could be solved, with his friends standing by him. "Fighting the Fire Lord is going to be the hardest thing we've ever done together. But I wouldn't want to do it any other way."

Toph, Katara, Sokka and Suki moved at the same time to hug him, almost forming a circle. Katara looked up at Zuko. "Get over here, Zuko," she said patiently. "Being part of the group also means being part of group hugs."

Zuko was reluctant, but he stepped up and joined them anyway. As juvenile as they sometimes were, it was nice to feel like he belonged, like he was part of a group. A moment later Appa flew over, knocking the group down as he tried to join the circle.

* * *

><p>*Iroh says this in the prequel comic <em>Zuko's Story<em>, written by Dave Roman and Alison Wilgus, with art by Nina Matsumoto. It was inspired by M. Night Shyamalan's movie, but it has a lot of references to people and places only mentioned in the show. I found it very good, and I'd like to work references.

Author's Note: Sorry this chapter took so long! I've been hesitant in posting this chapter, as well as the next few, because I feel like I'm going into less well-charted territory. I mean, I have a plan, but I'm worried it's too similar to what happens in the show—except for one change that I've been working towards (_cough_ foreshadowing _cough_) for a while. For now, I wanted to give the characters some respite before the big battle; I hope it wasn't too "fluffy". I wanted to make it clear that Zuko and Katara are making an effort to get to know each other. While their attraction came pretty quickly, their love wasn't head-over-heels; it took time to form, and they're still trying to moderate its development. I think that's what every person in a courtship should do, especially teenagers. Also, I've been wrestling with the idea of reworking the first stage of this story, when Katara was Zuko's prisoner. I'm kind of afraid to touch such old material. The thing is, I know my writing changed in the three years (just had the anniversary!) since I started this project, you can tell by the length and quality of the chapters. What do you think, my readers?


	47. Preparation

_Published July 27, 2014_

Author's Note: Sorry this took a while! I've been putting off updates since I'm still trying to figure out how to rework the earlier part of this story, and some of my new/upcoming developments required adding some details to previous chapters. The good news is, I know where I'm going with the climax. Until then, enjoy this!

* * *

><p>"Preparation"<p>

Sometimes I think our love is inexperienced. The question of dying becomes a wise reminder. It cures us of our innocence of the future. ~ Don DeLillo, _White Noise_

Everyone's recreational activities effectively came to an end in order to prepare for the comet's arrival. Katara watched while Zuko taught Aang his final firebending lesson: the technique for directing lightning, the same technique she had watched Zuko learn under Iroh's guidance.

"So, have you ever redirected lightning before?"

"Once, against my father."

Aang actually looked eager at this. "What did it feel like?"

Zuko stopped going through the motions, putting his hands back at his sides. "Exhilarating … but terrifying." Aang's eagerness vanished at this. Zuko explained, "You feel so powerful holding that much energy in your body, but you know that if you make the wrong move, it's over."

"Well, not _over _over," Aang said, laughing nervously. "I mean, there's always Katara and a little spirit water action, am I right?" He looked to her for confirmation.

"Actually, I used it all up after Azula shot you," Katara informed him.

"Oh."

"But, there might be another way." Aang and Zuko looked at Katara, who went on, "When we found Wan Shi Tong's library, I did some research about lightning wounds. I found one account about a man who was struck by lightning and seemed to die, but then was struck again and revived. So I have this theory, that if lightning can stop someone's heart, it might be able to restart it."

"Really?" Aang looked impressed. "That's incredible."

"It's not foolproof, though. If you were struck twice, there could still be internal damage to organs, or exterior burns."

"You can't count on having a second chance," Zuko said adamantly. "You'll have to take the Fire Lord's life before he takes yours."

"Right … okay," Aang said, sounding uncertain and unconvinced. "I'll just do that."

* * *

><p>Sokka got the entire group to participate in a simulated battle late in the afternoon. The plan he proposed for this test was simple: he paired himself with Suki, Zuko with Katara to work in teams, distracting the Fire Lord (a scarecrow with a melon for a head) and fighting his soldiers (earthen statues bent by Toph). Toph did wonder what her actual role would be during the real battle. Sokka valued her skills too much to leave her completely out of the fray. She would probably be sent to deal with metal vehicles—and they didn't have any of those that she could practice on. At any rate, she enjoyed chucking flaming rocks at her friends, because she knew they could evade them.<p>

As far as she could tell, everything went smoothly in the practice run—right up until the point when Aang was supposed to move in. He made it to the Melon Lord unhindered—though in real life the Fire Lord would certainly be moving to block him—but when he landed in front of the moppet, he stopped.

Sokka started yelling at Aang before Toph could get to him. Then, when Aang explained that it hadn't felt right, Sokka drew his meteorite sword and sliced the melon into pieces. Toph felt Aang cringe, and wondered whether he was comparing the sound of fruit slicing to the sound of flesh slicing.

Even though the others had done their jobs reasonably well, they went home in somber silence. Katara gathered the pieces of fruit to add to their evening meal. They didn't talk much while they ate, either.

Toph waited until everyone had finished eating before bringing up the topic on everyone's mind. "Someone's got to say it," she said, setting her empty bowl down on the steps. "What happened during training can't happen in the field. Because good execution won't matter if you hesitate at the last second. One second is all your opponent needs to knock you dead. You need to beat him to it."

"There's got to be another way," Aang said, looking out at the ocean rather than at his friends.

Katara spoke up gently. "Aang, we found out about this on the Winter Solstice. That was almost three seasons ago. We've spent all our time preparing for this."

Toph turned her head in her direction. "Actually, when I joined, you guys didn't tell me about any comet. You just said you hoped to defeat the Fire Lord in the summer. I didn't know about the deadline until we talked to the Earth King."

"Oh really?" Suki's tone was conversational. "I only found out today."

"Where were you going with this, Katara?" Aang asked, already visibly impatient.

"Well, the way you're acting now begs the question … what were you thinking you would do?"

"I don't know … incapacitate him long enough to put him in prison? Someplace where he can't firebend?" The others looked at Aang, unimpressed.

Sokka spoke up, one arm resting on his knee. "Remember when the Earth King put Long Feng in prison? Even when he lost political power, he still had people who were loyal to him. He was still able to help Azula orchestrate a coup."

Zuko nodded. "There will be plenty of people willing to support Ozai. The only way to make sure he'll never be a threat again is to kill him."

Aang looked anguished. "If I kill him, everyone in the Fire Nation will think I'm a murderer. They'll remember me the way the people in Chin's village remembered Kyoshi. And who knows what could happen afterwards? People who support Ozai might make him into a martyr. They might rally around Azula and fight to avenge him."

"Then you'd use him as an example of what happens when they fight you," Toph said. "You'd be putting them in their place. Showing them who's in charge." _Like you've done in other places_, she thought but didn't say.

"No. I don't want people to do what I say just because they fear me."

Zuko could understand that. It would be acting like Azula, Ozai, and the past Fire Lords. Toph spoke up. "But if they don't know how powerful you are, they won't take you seriously. Like how no one took me seriously until I proved how tough I am."

"I don't want power! I want _peace!_"

"We _all_ want that," Katara insisted.

Aang turned on her. "What do you think, Katara? You didn't kill when you had the chance."

All heads turned to Katara, who looked surprised but calm. "That was different," she said after a moment. "Yon Rha had retired from the army; killing him wouldn't have helped anyone." She could have added _Except maybe me_, but she didn't. "If you kill someone unnecessarily, just for personal satisfaction, then it's selfish and wrong. But if you do it to protect others, then it's selfless. Killing the Fire Lord will prevent more death and destruction. I don't like the idea of you killing anyone, Aang, but—I think it's necessary."

"No. Putting him out of power is necessary. But I can't believe that killing is the answer. Fighting violence _with_ violence just causes more violence."

"Not if you kill the source of the violence," Sokka said logically.

"That might lead to more violence. And even if that doesn't happen, what I do is going to set a precedent for future Avatars. I don't want them to use me as an example for killing people who get in the way. It goes against everything I learned from the monks. I can't just go around wiping out people I don't like."

"If it's in the name of keeping balance, I'm pretty sure the universe will forgive you," Sokka said.

Hearing Sokka's lighthearted tone made Aang's patience snap. "This isn't a joke, Sokka!" he shouted. "None of you understands the position I'm in!"

"Aang, we do understand, it's just—"

"Just _what_, Katara?"

"We're _trying_ to help!"

"Then when you figure out a way for me to beat the Fire Lord without taking his life, I'd love to hear it!" With that, Aang stomped off toward his room.

"Aang! Don't walk away from this!"

Toph got to her feet and started after him; but Zuko held an arm out to stop her. "Let him go. He needs time to sort it out by himself." He remembered how he had felt arguing with the Fire Nation girls the last time he was in this place. Arguing with others helped him realize some truths, but he had to make his decisions in solitude.

Toph scowled but stayed in the courtyard, setting up her earth tent while the others cleaned up the meal. Zuko followed Katara to the kitchen to wash the plates. It was a routine they had developed: Katara used waterbending to wash and dry the vessels, and then Zuko sorted them into piles.

"Are you afraid?"

"Yes. I mean, I'm sure Aang can win … but he won't be the only one fighting." He cast a glance at his girlfriend—he was still getting used to thinking of her that way—and thought of his other friends, who were elsewhere in the house. If they were all entering this battle, any of them could be hurt, or killed.

Katara was thoughtful, too. "I wonder what will be harder, taking out the Fire Lord, or taking out the airship fleet. I mean, Aang was able to drive off Zhao's fleet at the North Pole, but that was when the Ocean Spirit was helping him."

"I don't think he ever realized the amount of damage he did there. I mean, the Ocean Spirit was the one acting, but Aang was the one enabling him to destroy ships and kill people."

"Hush!" Katara bent a small splash at Zuko's arm.

"Sorry," Zuko muttered, brushing the water off his sleeve.

"I know, it is weird that he's only considering this dilemma now. We knew all along that Aang would have to defeat the Fire Lord. We found out when he met Avatar Roku at the Sage's Temple. It was the reason I stole the waterbending scroll, why we put so much effort into finding teachers. He knew it was to prepare him for a fight."

Zuko pushed the plates and bowls into a cupboard and closed it heavily. "He's been in plenty of _fights_, but has he ever _defeated_ anyone? Does he understand what that means? The defeated opponent has two options: surrender or resistance. Ozai isn't going to surrender, he'll fight for as long as he's able. The victor gets to choose whether to free, imprison, or kill the opponent.. Aang can't free him, and he won't go quietly into imprisonment … that only leaves the option of killing him."

Katara still looked displeased. "I don't like you talking like that. He is your father. Didn't you used to love him?"

"I thought I did, but …" Zuko trailed off. Katara looked at him, and was pretty sure she saw a blush on his cheeks. "This is going to sound stupid … just, lately, I've found out what love is really like. I don't just mean with you, I mean with the whole gang, and my uncle and mother. And what I feel for the people I really love can't compare to what I used to feel for him."

Katara felt her heart melting—she didn't know how else to describe it—not for the first time in Zuko's presence. She hugged him impulsively, surprising him, but he held her close anyway. "I love you, too."

This wasn't the way he'd thought they would profess it, but he didn't care. He smirked a little. "I love you more."

"I loved you first," Katara insisted.

It was the best argument they'd ever had.

Zuko smiled, and leaned forward to kiss her forehead. "Get some rest. Whatever comes next, we want to be ready for it."

* * *

><p>Everyone was up early the next day, to help pack up their supplies and get ready to head for the Fire Nation Capitol. They didn't know exactly what they would do once they arrived, but hopefully they could figure out a plan on the way.<p>

Since they had agreed to give Aang some space, no one thought to look for him until after they had finished packing. And then they found that he was nowhere in the beach house. Or on the beach, though he had left a trail of footprints leading into the water.

"I bet he ran away again," Toph said darkly. Zuko didn't understand what she meant, until she expressed her frustration while they searched the island. Toph insisted on going with him, since she was the only one who hadn't gone on a field trip with him.

"You and Aang and me, we're all runaways," she said as they combed the island's boundaries. "There are two reasons why anyone runs away: to run toward something, or to get away from something. You and I left to get out of bad family situations, but also to help Aang and the war and stuff. But Aang's only ever left home for one reason at a time."

"When has he done that?"

"A hundred years ago, he tried to run away from his Avatar duties and … the destiny they said he had to face. But after Ba Sing Se fell, he wanted to run _toward_ his destiny. He ran away so he could face it without us getting hurt."

"I doubt Aang is trying to run away from this problem. He understands what's at stake. He knows what he has to do."

Toph folded her arms. "Oh, I don't think he's running away from facing the Fire Lord. I think he's probably on his way there, or trying to figure out a new plan for how to beat him, or talk him into a peace agreement. Some roundabout airbender trick to avoid a direct confrontation. He never faces his problems head-on."

"He will this time," Zuko said. "I don't think he'll find a way around it. And Toph? I wouldn't have joined you guys if I didn't believe he could win. Look at what he's done already. He escaped a genocide, survived in a block of ice for a hundred years, destroyed an entire fleet, and survived Azula's lightning attack. If anyone can defeat the Fire Lord, it's Aang."

"There's no doubt that he _can_; the question is whether he _will_. And if he won't …" She trailed off. "Y'know, I never really thought about the possibility of him _not _succeeding, until Azula nearly killed him. If that could happen once—" She didn't finish her sentence. She didn't have to. They knew that Aang could fail again.

"That's not going to happen," Zuko said firmly. "We'll find him, and help him face his destiny. That's what we agreed to do, isn't it?"

Toph kept her back to him. "I guess you're right," she said.

Zuko clapped a hand lightly on her shoulder. "Come on." They trudged up the sand back to the royal family's beach house. Katara and Suki had already returned, and Sokka arrived with Appa shortly after. None of them had spotted Aang. And Sokka made things worse when, upon realizing Momo was also missing, he accused Appa of eating the lemur.

"Get out of the bison's mouth, Sokka," Zuko said, clearly displeased. "We have a real problem here. Aang is nowhere to be found and the comet is only two days away."

"What should we do, Zuko?" Katara asked, turning around to look at him.

"I don't know." Zuko stood to stretch his legs, but then saw that the girls were still looking to him, as though for guidance. "Why are you all looking at me?"

"Well, you are kind of the expert on tracking Aang," Katara said delicately.

"Yeah," Toph agreed. "If anyone has experience with hunting the Avatar, it's you."

They were right, of course. Zuko thought back to his old attempts to find Aang, counting them in his head. The South Pole … Kyoshi Island … Roku's temple … pirates … the abbey that produced perfumes …

"I've got an idea."

* * *

><p>It was a mark of how much everyone in the group trusted Zuko that they allowed him to take the group to the Earth Kingdom without telling them the destination he had in mind. Night had fallen by the time they landed, outside a multistoried building set in a sparse forest. The five teenagers entered together, taking in the scene: people—mostly men—drinking and fighting.<p>

Katara cast a wary glance around the room. "And the reason you've brought us to a seedy Earth Kingdom tavern is—what now?"

"June." Zuko pointed to the thin, strong woman who was alternately drinking something and doling blows to thugs. While the others discussed who she was and how they knew her, Toph merely observed. To Toph, fending off buff male attackers, and catching her drink with elegance, merited respect. "I don't know who this June lady is, but I like her," Toph said, smiling in approval.

June saw the group approaching her, and recognized Zuko, Katara, and Sokka. She didn't look particularly happy to see any of them, but maybe that was casual indifference. "Oh great, it's Prince Pouty. Where's your creepy grandpa?"

"He's my uncle, and he's not here."

June smirked. "I see you worked things out with your girlfriend," she said, raising her cup toward Katara. Sokka coughed uncomfortably, and Zuko blushed in spite of himself, remembering Jun's initial impression of their relationship. She had been more right than any of them had been willing to admit at the time.

"Well … yeah, as a matter of fact," Katara said, smiling and shrugging one shoulder. Zuko cleared his throat.

Toph spoke up, with her hands on her hips, in a businesslike manner. "Actually, we need you to find my boyfriend."

"The Avatar," Zuko clarified. "You found him once before; you could do it again."

June snorted softly. "The same job a second time? That doesn't sound too fun." She took a leisurely sip.

Something snapped inside Zuko, and for a moment he was like his old, angry self again. "Does the end of the world sound like more fun?"

June paused and stared at him. "You're serious? It's that important?"

"Yes. We need to find the Avatar so he can prevent the worst genocide in the history of humankind."

"Fine." June ordered a steak for her shirshu, then led them outside, where they found Appa interacting with the other animal. "Okay, who's got something with the Avatar's scent on it?"

Katara went up to Appa's saddle. "I have Aang's staff." She handed the wooden object to June, who held it out for Nyla to smell. The shirshu sniffed the air, then walked in a circle, as though trying to catch the scent in every possible direction. But then it laid its head on the ground and put its paws over its nose.

"Well, what does that mean?" Zuko asked.

"It means your friend's gone," June answered.

"We know he's gone," Toph said exasperatedly, "that's why we're looking for him."

"No, I mean he's _gone_ gone. He doesn't exist."

There were a few seconds of horrified silence before Sokka asked her to clarify. "What do you mean Aang doesn't exist? D'you mean he's—you know—dead?"

"No, we could find him if he were dead," June said.

Suki glanced sideways at Katara. "You don't think he could be hiding in another iceberg or something, do you?" She didn't know how to answer.

"It's a real head-scratcher." June shrugged, then waved nonchalantly, turning back toward the tavern. "See ya."

"Helpful," Toph said. "Real helpful."

"Wait. I have another idea." Everyone looked at Zuko. "There's only one other person in this world who can help us face the Fire Lord." He climbed up to Appa's saddle.

"Who does he mean?" Suki asked.

Katara had a shrewd idea. "Someone powerful, and someone Zuko would keep a memento from."

"Good ol' Uncle Iroh," Toph agreed.

Zuko leapt down from the saddle, holding up something that smelled like sweat. Suki, Sokka, and Katara instantly blocked their noses, flinching. "You saved your uncle's sweaty sandal?" Sokka said incredulously.

"It helped me track him down before," Zuko said.

Toph actually smiled. "I think it's kind of sweet."

Nyla sniffed the sandal, and this time she immediately responded. "Let's do this," June said, seeming determined now.

They traveled throughout the day. A few people at a time tried napping, especially Toph, since she couldn't watch the scenery like the others. They talked a little bit about their plans for the comet. If they were going to sabotage the airships, Toph would be needed for metalbending, and Sokka would be needed for technical knowledge. "I'll go where you go," Suki told him.

"The terrain's starting to look familiar," Sokka said at one point. He was the only one of them who had flown to and from Ba Sing Se multiple times, so he was the first to realize that was where they were going. Finally, after dusk, they reached a collapsed section of the outer wall.

"Your uncle's somewhere beyond the wall," June confirmed. "Nyla's getting twitchy, so he can't be too far." She actually smiled at them. "Good luck." It was the only kind word she said to them, before she steered the shirshu back in the direction they had just come from.

Zuko watched them leave, realizing they probably should have offered some kind of payment if they wanted June to take them the whole way. "It's been a long day," he said finally. "Let's camp and start our search again at dawn."

Toph set up her earth tent while the others settled on Appa's furry legs, which were just wide enough to hold a person.

Katara exhaled deeply, like a sigh.

"You still awake?"

She turned over and saw that Zuko was also lying awake on Appa's other leg. "Yeah."

He merely looked at her. "Are you worried?"

"With Aang missing and the world about to end? I'm about as worried as everyone else here. And you? What's keeping you awake?"

"I'm just … apprehensive about seeing Uncle again." Zuko laughed a little bit. "I know, that's probably the last thing I should be worried about now … but it's been over a month since I last saw him, and we weren't on good terms when I left …"

"He's your family," Katara said, as though he had forgotten this blood relation. "Your real family. You've both said that you're more like father and son. If he loves you, he'll be thrilled to see you."

Zuko didn't say whether he agreed with her. Instead he said, "I know he'll be glad to see you. He considers you a good friend."

"I feel the same way about him. You're lucky to have a mentor like that."

"I know." If only he had appreciated Iroh's mentorship while he was undergoing it; he might have saved Iroh so much suffering …

They didn't speak again, but Katara could tell that Zuko was still awake, even though he kept his eyes closed. On an impulse, she leaned over and brushed his hair out of his face, her fingers just grazing his scar. He flinched reflexively, still half-asleep. "Shh," Katara soothed. She smiled, and then leaned over to kiss his cheek, right where his pale skin met his scar. He had kissed her the same way, just a week and a half ago. She could hear Zuko sigh, this time contentedly.

"I love you," she whispered, before lying down in Appa's soft fur. She was still getting used to saying that out loud. She laid her hand in Zuko's outstretched palm, only to feel his fingers curl instinctively around hers.

* * *

><p>Katara and Zuko were still holding hands when they woke, startled by the trembling of earth and brightness of fire, a ring of it circling their campsite. Immediately everyone in the group was on their feet, and trying to spot their attacker.<p>

Four people appeared on the crumbled section of the wall before them. Suki didn't know any of them. Zuko and Toph recognized one, swordsmater Piandao. Sokka and Katara were the only ones who recognized all four: Pakku, Jeong Jeong, Piandao, and Bumi. "Well, look who's here," Bumi cackled. Sokka and Katara's faces both broke into incredulous grins. Jeong Jeong raised his arms and lowered the flames.

"Sorry about that," Piandao said. "We thought you might be intruders."

"That's okay," Sokka said.

"What's going on here?" Toph said. "We're surrounded by old people."

"Not just any old people," Katara said. "These are great masters and friends of ours." Suki and Toph hung back the next few minutes while the others recognized each other and exchanged pleasantries.

"So, wait. How do you all know each other?" Suki asked.

"We're all part of the same ancient secret society, a group that transcends the divisions of the Four Nations."

Zuko smiled, understanding. "The Order of the White Lotus."

"That's the one," Bumi confirmed cheerfully. Unlike the others, he didn't seem surprised that Zuko knew of them.

Jeong Jeong explained, "The White Lotus has always been about philosophy, and beauty, and truth. But about a month ago, a call went out that we were needed for something."

"The call came from a Grand Lotus," Pakku said, looking to Zuko, "your uncle, Iroh of the Fire Nation."

"Well, that's who we're looking for!" Toph said.

"Then we'll take you to him," Piandao said decisively.

They hadn't found the person they were looking for right away, but they found some people they _weren't_ looking for, and it seemed they would soon find the former as well.

"I didn't catch your name," Toph said to the earthbender with the manic laugh.

"This is Aang's old friend Bumi, King of Omashu," Sokka said.

"Oh, so _you're_ Bumi," Toph said, remembering when she had heard the name before. "Aang told me about you. I'm his earthbending teacher."

"The one who listens and waits?"

"Something like that."

Katara walked with Pakku, asking after her grandmother and others she had left behind in the Southern Water Tribe. "The spirit water you gave me saved Aang's life," Katara told Pakku. "Did you know somehow that we would need it?"

"Of course not. But Yugoda pointed out that spirit water might be most useful to the Avatar, being part spirit himself."

They finally reached the old masters' campground. Bumi collapsed the earthbent wall to let them in. "Well, here we are. Welcome to old people camp."

Zuko looked around apprehensively at the small city of tents. "Where—where is he?"

"Your uncle is in there, Prince Zuko," Piandao said, pointing to a large tent set up in the middle of the grounds.

Katara watched Zuko go up to Iroh's tent, then stop, and then sit down in the grass. Concerned, she went up next to him. "Are you okay?"

"No, I'm not okay." Zuko turned his head away from Katara. "My uncle hates me, I know it." Katara sat down as Zuko continued, "He loved me and supported me in every way he could, and I still turned against him. How can I even face him?"

"Zuko," Katara said, smiling softly, "you're sorry for what you did, right?"

Zuko still didn't look at her. "More sorry than I've been about anything."

"Then he'll forgive you," Katara said confidently. Zuko looked at her, and he saw that she looked just as she had during those days when they were enemies. Lately she had barely been recognizable with her hair down instead of braided, but now she had the same kind expression. "He will," she repeated.

Zuko and Katara looked at each other. The enemies turned allies turned friends turned lovers. Zuko's confidence increased a little. Katara had once said that it was impossible to forgive; yet here she was, assuring Zuko that his uncle would. If Katara could forgive him, then surely Iroh would.

"You have to forgive yourself, too," Katara said. She smiled sheepishly. "I know I haven't been much help; but you have to stop beating yourself up over your past deeds. I'm not saying you should forget about them—it's good to learn from your mistakes. But then, you have to let go of your guilt."

Zuko looked at the ground again, considering her words. Katara glanced at the tent door. "Do you want me to go with you?"

"No. But, thank you." Making amends with Iroh was something Zuko had to do alone. They stood up together. Katara watched Zuko walk up to the door of the tent, take a deep breath, and enter.

* * *

><p>Sokka and the girls were able to sleep for the last few hours before dawn. Pakku and Piandao woke them up when the elders were serving breakfast.<p>

Suddenly Toph looked up brightly. "Hey, guess who woke up!" The others turned and saw Zuko and Iroh emerging from the Grand Lotus tent. Katara froze when she caught sight of Iroh.

It was like seeing her father again, only without any conflict or negativity. The choked-with-tears feeling in her throat and chest was different, filled with joy, incredulous despite knowing and hoping she would see him again.

Katara ran over and hugged him without embarrassment. "Oh, my," Iroh said, hugging her in return. Katara actually blinked back tears, she was so happy. When they pulled apart, he kept his hands on her shoulders, studying her the way he used to study Zuko after an extended absence. "You've grown," he marveled. She wasn't quite the skinny waterbender he'd befriended on a sea voyage.

"It's so good to see you," Katara said. "I looked for you, on the Day of Black Sun." She folded her arms, still smiling. "I should have known you already had a plan."

Toph, Sokka, and a girl he did not recognize followed her. "Good to see you again," Toph said.

"Likewise," Iroh said happily. "And who is this?"

"This is my girlfriend, Suki of the Earth Kingdom," Sokka introduced. "She's the leader of the Kyoshi Warriors."

"We have so much to tell you," Katara said. "And so much to discuss. This is the day we've been waiting for, ever since Avatar Roku told Aang he would have to defeat the Fire Lord when Sozin's Comet arrived."

Iroh looked around. "Where is Aang?"

"That's kind of the point," Toph said. "We don't know where he is."

"That's why we came here," Zuko explained, turning to Iroh.

Iroh became solemn as he realized what they were getting at. "Let's have breakfast and talk about our plans."

Team Avatar and Iroh sat in a circle outside Iroh's tent to have breakfast. "Our third cup of tea together," Iroh said, passing Katara a steaming cup.

Katara smiled, remembering. "On the first cup, you are a stranger."

"On the second cup, you are a friend," Toph chimed in.

Zuko spoke up, surprising everyone. "And on the third cup, you are family."

Iroh smiled, pleased that he had taught the children something they remembered. "And for our family, we are prepared to do anything—even die," he said seriously. That last word made silence fall on them like a heavy blanket. Iroh looked around the group, holding up the vessel. "Anyone else?"

They each accepted a cup of tea, one after the other. They made no toasts or compliments, but simply taking the beverage felt like they were making a covenant. It was hard to focus on eating and drinking when they were discussing strategies for the most important event in their lives.

Once they had brought Iroh up-to-date on recent events, Zuko finally got to the point. "Uncle, you're the only person other than the Avatar who can possibly defeat the Father Lord."

Toph paused and pointed her chopsticks at Zuko. "You mean the Fire Lord."

"That's what I just said!"

Iroh frowned, deep in thought. "We need you to come with us," Zuko pleaded.

"No, Zuko. It won't turn out well."

"You can beat him. And we'll be there to help," Zuko said, looking around at his circle of friends. Never before had he had so many good, reliable people fighting on his side, fighting with him.

"Even if I did defeat Ozai – and I don't know that I could –" Iroh said, raising an eyebrow, "it would be the wrong way to end the war. History would see it as just more senseless violence, a brother killing a brother to grab power. The only way for this war to end peacefully is for the Avatar to defeat the Fire Lord."

There was a short silence as those words sank in. The members of Team Avatar realized that Iroh was right, as usual. The reason Aang had been singled out to defeat the Fire Lord was not because he had the ability, but because he had the responsibility.

"And then …" Zuko looked up at Iroh again, his eyes hopeful. "Then would you come and take your rightful place on the throne?"

"No. Someone new must take the throne." Iroh turned his head toward his nephew. "An idealist with a pure heart and unquestionable honor. It has to be you, Prince Zuko."

Zuko looked at his uncle in surprise. Him, Fire Lord? The idea hadn't occurred to him until he was ten years old, when his father had usurped the throne. Then Zuko got used to the fact that he would one day be Fire Lord. His desire for the throne had been part of his drive while searching for Aang. But during his days as a fugitive, Zuko had let go of the idea, knowing he probably wouldn't return home. Then he had returned, welcomed home as a war hero, and he'd gone back to thinking that he could be Fire Lord. But he'd let go of that possibility once more, when he left the Fire Nation to join the Avatar.

"Unquestionable honor?" Zuko repeated incredulously. "But I've made so many mistakes."

"Yes, you have," Iroh admitted. "You struggled, you suffered, but you have always followed _your_ own path. You restored your _own_ honor. And only you can restore the honor of the Fire Nation."

Zuko looked down in thought. "I'll try, Uncle," he vowed.

"You can do it," Katara said earnestly. Zuko looked up at her, and she smiled at him. "I have faith in you."

"You'll make a much better Fire Lord than your father," Sokka agreed. "Or your grandfather. Or your great-grandfather."

Zuko smiled gratefully at them.

"Well … what if Aang doesn't come back?" Toph interjected, a worried expression on her face.

Iroh spoke again, with conviction and finality in his voice. "Sozin's Comet is arriving, and our destinies are upon us. Aang will face the Fire Lord." He paused, and when he spoke his voice was heavy with the wisdom that comes from experience wrought with mistakes. "When I was a boy, I had a vision that I would one day take Ba Sing Se. That is why I tried so hard to conquer the city when I was a general." The members of Team Avatar stared at Iroh in awe as he continued, "Only now do I see that my destiny is to take it _back_ from the Fire Nation, so the Earth Kingdom can be free again."

Now they understood. "That's why you gathered the members of the White Lotus," Suki said, gesturing her arm to the camp.

"Yes." Iroh addressed his nephew again. "Zuko, you must return to the Fire Nation so that when the Fire Lord falls, you can assume the throne and restore peace and order. But Azula will be there, waiting for you."

Zuko set his jaw, a look of determination on his scarred face. "I can handle Azula," he said confidently.

"Not alone." Zuko looked at Iroh, startled. "You'll need help," Iroh insisted.

Zuko bowed his head. Of course he would. There was still an arrogant part of him that kept running headlong into dangerous situations. But he was part of a team now; he didn't need to do these things alone anymore. "You're right." Zuko looked up. "Katara, how would you like to help me put Azula in her place?"

Katara looked mildly surprised at first, but then she smiled. "It would be my pleasure," she assured him.

"What about us?" Sokka had been silent throughout most of the conversation, but now he voiced his uncertainty. "What's our destiny today?"

Iroh smiled slightly, quirking an eyebrow at the Water Tribe warrior dressed in full uniform. "What do you think it is?"

Sokka looked down, deep in thought. "I think that … even though we don't know where Aang is, we need to do everything we can to stop the airship fleet." He slammed his left fist into his right palm.

Toph looked happily excited and eager now. "And that means when Aang does face the Fire Lord, we'll be right there if he needs us."

Everyone in the circle exchanged smiles. They felt they had a purpose again. This was the day that all their preparation came down to. They were about to make history.

Katara spoke up. "When Sokka and I found Aang in an iceberg, and found out that he was the Avatar, my grandmother said we had found him for a reason, and that our destinies were intertwined with his." Everyone looked at Katara, who smiled at each of them. "I had no idea how right she was. I always held on to the hope that the Avatar would end the war. I never thought I'd help to end the war."

"Me neither," Toph said. "Before I met you guys, all I could see ahead of me was being a china doll for my parents and sneaking out to fight in Earth Rumbles. I never thought I'd have any friends, or travel anywhere, or do anything remotely important with my life."

"Neither did I," Suki said. She hesitated, then decided to address the camelephant in the room. "What if—not all of us make it back?" she ventured, almost guiltily.

Silence fell over the group. Then Toph spoke up quietly. "Aang says some friendships are so strong, they can transcend lifetimes." She shrugged one shoulder, as though she didn't know for sure whether this could be helpful or meaningful.

Sokka put down his bowl of food. "Whatever happens today—it won't be the end. It'll be the beginning." _For better or worse_.

There was nothing left to do but clean up breakfast and say goodbye. The teenagers had to start out immediately to reach their destinations by the time the comet entered the earth's atmosphere. The White Lotus members were already in place, and had only to wait for the right moment to take back Ba Sing Se.

Zuko approached the youngest team member. "Hey, Toph? If you see Aang, tell him … I'm glad to have been his teacher. And I know he can do what he needs to."

"Don't count on me," Toph said, not even turning her head toward him. Zuko blinked at her, surprised, but then she said, "I'm counting on both of you to survive. You'll be able to tell him yourself."

Zuko smiled. Then Toph punched him in the arm. "Hey!" he exclaimed. "What was that for?"

"That's how I show affection," she explained.

"Oh. Well, in that case—" Zuko pulled him arm back, but she caught his punch and somehow ducked underneath, pulling his arm behind his back. "Hey!"

"You think you can hit a little girl?" But she was laughing.

Katara saw the exchange and laughed, too. "You'd think Toph was his sister, instead of Azula," she said to Sokka.

"Yeah. About Azula … don't underestimate her," Sokka said seriously. "She knows how to get to people in a roundabout way."

"Okay."

"I guess I'm supposed to say 'I love you' and 'I'm proud of you' and stuff like that … but I think you already know that, so …"

Katara silenced him with a hug. Then she was walking away, leaving Sokka watching his sister walk up to Zuko. It was strange, but he had the feeling he would see the same thing again in the future, maybe more than once. It felt like he was watching his little sister leave.

Sokka spotted Zuko saying goodbye to Piandao and Iroh. He waited until they had finished hugging it out, then approached him. "Zuko?" He cast a glance at Katara, who was hugging Toph and Suki. "Look out for my sister."

Zuko nodded, following his gaze. "I always do."

"Right." Sokka shifted his weight, not knowing what else to say. "So … good luck out there." He offered his arm, the way he did with other warriors.

Zuko smiled and grasped his forearm. "You too." Then they went in opposite directions, Sokka to Piandao, who was helping Suki and Toph onto a giant eel-hound, and Zuko to Katara, who was already at Appa's side.

"Are you okay to fly back to the Fire Nation?" Katara asked Appa. The bison roared in what she hoped was affirmation.

"He's had food and rest," Zuko said, joining her. "He'll be fine. And it'll be safer where we're going than where the others are going. The airships could shoot him down."

Katara nodded, and then turned to see Iroh and Pakku coming up to them. One was her master, and her step-grandfather. The other was a beloved friend. Both had taught her more lessons than she could name. "I don't know how to thank you."

"I think you already have," Iroh said. "My nephew tells me you've made him very happy. But if you want to thank me further, you can keep him safe for me."

Katara nodded and hugged each of them. "We'll meet again," she promised. Then she climbed up onto Appa. Pakku noticed the Fire Prince giving her a hand up.

Iroh nudged him with his elbow. "If my nephew and your new granddaughter both survive, you and I might end up related!" Pakku just shook his head, as if in exasperation. In his experience, Katara was never one to conform to tradition.

Zuko and Katara didn't hear this exchange, but Zuko looked down to his uncle once more. "So if I'm going to be Fire Lord after the war is over … what will you do?"

Iroh smiled up at Zuko. "After we reconquer Ba Sing Se—" He pulled a lotus tile out of his sleeve, tossed it in the air, and caught it in his palm. "—I'm going to reconquer my tea shop, and I'm going to play Pai Sho every day."

Zuko smiled, remembering how much that tile had annoyed him, the day Zuko's tempestuous relationship with Katara started. In a way, that game piece had been the cause of Zuko's forming a relationship with Katara. If they hadn't gone looking for the lotus tile in the pirate boutique, Zuko wouldn't have teamed up with the pirates; they wouldn't have captured Katara; she never would have become the firebenders' friend. Iroh was right: destiny _was_ strange. Something as insignificant as a game piece could have drastic effects on multiple lives.

"Goodbye, Iroh," Katara said.

"Good luck, everyone." There was no trace of doubt or worry in Iroh's face as he looked up at the teenagers. "Today, destiny is our friend. I know it."

Sokka and Zuko flicked their reins at the same moment, and the two animals started running and flying in different directions. Katara watched from Appa's saddle until the eel-hound left her sight. _Be safe_.


	48. Redirection

_Published August 24, 2014_

"Redirection"

* * *

><p>"Fire and Ice"<br>Robert Frost

Some say the world will end in fire,  
>Some say in ice.<br>From what I've tasted of desire  
>I hold with those who favor fire.<br>But if it had to perish twice,  
>I think I know enough of hate<br>To say that for destruction ice  
>Is also great<br>And would suffice.

* * *

><p>For the first part of the journey back to the Fire Nation, Zuko tried to describe the layout of the palace to Katara. "There are sewers with running water in the plaza. You'll have the biggest supply of water there."<p>

"Sewers. Got it."

"There are imperial firebenders, and probably Dai Li agents too."

Katara was alarmed to hear this. "Sounds like she's got a small army."

"This is a delicate situation, though. It's a matter of birthright. If—when—my father falls, one of us will take the throne. I'm older than her, but if he's named her his heir, then …"

"Then what?"

"We'll probably end up fighting for it. And the Fire Sages and imperial firebenders will have to pick sides, based on who wins, or who they believe will win."

They sat in silence for a short while. They noticed the sky changing colors, as though the sun were setting, though it was only the middle of the day. Sozin's Comet painted the sky red-orange, almost blood red in some places.

Katara heard Zuko breathing deeply, evenly, almost as if he were meditating. "What is it?"

"The comet." Zuko looked around at the red-tinted sky. "I can feel it. It's hard to explain …"

"I'm guessing it's like when the moon is full for me," Katara reasoned.

"Well, imagine how you'd feel during a super-moon. I've never felt this kind of energy … at least not this much at once."

The silence between them became brooding after that. Zuko tried to remember everything he'd learned about firebending, mentally going through forms and reciting facts. Katara kept glancing at his facial expression. It almost reminded her of his old demeanor—hard, determined, and single-minded in achieving his goal.

Finally she broke the tense silence. "Zuko, don't worry. We can take Azula."

"I'm not worried about her," Zuko said. "I'm worried about Aang. What if he doesn't have the guts to take out my father?" He looked at Katara, his amber eyes filled with concern. "What if he loses?"

It was a possibility they had tried not to consider. If Aang lost the battle against Fire Lord Ozai … Aang would most likely be killed; if he died in the Avatar State, the Avatar would cease to exist; the Earth Kingdom would be burned to the ground; and the Fire Nation would eventually complete its quest for world domination.

Katara's blue eyes were fierce. "Aang won't lose," Katara said flatly. "He's going to come back." She looked away. "He has to."

The waterbender and the firebender lapsed into silence again, worrying about their friends, hoping all would go well, and contemplating the huge task that lay before them.

"Zuko," Katara said suddenly, "will you promise me something?"

He blinked at her, and then shrugged. "Sure."

"We don't usually split up for missions, so I've never had to think about this before, but …" Katara touched the blue pendant hanging around her neck. "If anything happens to me … I want you to give my necklace to Sokka."

A shadow crossed over Zuko's face. His good eye became almost as narrow as his scarred one. "You … want me … to promise …"

"Yes. I don't just mean if I die today; I'm going to die someday, and if it's …" She blushed slightly, because she was thinking of the future they might have together, though they had never gone so far as to discuss things like marriage and family. "… if it's before I have kids of my own … I'd want my next-of-kin to have it."

"No."

"What?"

"I can't promise that." Katara was going to ask him not to argue, not now, but then Zuko took her hand and said, "I'll promise you something else." His voice and his eyes were intense, passionate, with an almost dangerous calm. "Whatever happens, now or in the future, I won't let any harm come to you. Whatever it takes, I'll protect you."

Katara gave a weak, wry smile. "I don't doubt that you'll try. But, I don't want you to promise me that."

"Why not?"

"Remember when Azula attacked the air temple? You saw the rocks falling and pushed me out of the way, even though you could have been crushed too. Thanks for that, by the way."

"You're welcome."

"But the thing is, you put yourself in harm's way to protect me. I don't want you—or anyone else, for that matter—to die for me. It's hard enough that my mother did." She didn't tell him the heart of her thoughts, that if one of them had to die in this battle, it should be her. "The world needs you to live and become the new Fire Lord. Compared to that, the world will get along fine without me."

"Aang and Sokka and your father won't," Zuko insisted. "And me—I couldn't live with myself if I let you die, knowing I could have stopped your death." Katara found she couldn't look at him. "I just got you back," Zuko pleaded, squeezing her hand. "I can't lose you again."

"Well, it's all hypothetical, anyway," Katara said, finally looking at him again. "I just wanted you to know, for future reference. If things go well, you won't ever have to give Sokka the necklace."

Zuko looked at the pale blue pendant, a carving of the waterbending symbol. "You said it belonged to your mother?"

She nodded. "Actually, Master Pakku—the waterbender at the White Lotus camp—made it for my grandmother. In the Northern Water Tribe, when a couple gets engaged, the groom makes a betrothal necklace for his fiancée."

That was good to know, for future reference, Zuko thought, suppressing a smile.

"The thing is, Gran-Gran didn't want to marry Pakku at the time. She left the Northern Tribe, but she kept the necklace. She gave it to my mother, who passed it on to me. I was planning to give it to my daughter, but just now I was thinking that if I die, Sokka could give it to Suki, if he marries her. So it would stay in the family."

Zuko smiled a little. He knew Sokka was smitten with Suki; recently Zuko had caught her trying to sneak into Sokka's tent, and found him preparing for a romantic evening with her.

"Remember the day we met?" Zuko asked suddenly.

Katara blinked, then nodded, and her mouth twisted as though she wasn't sure whether to be amused or annoyed. "'Met' might be the wrong word. You attacked my village."

Zuko smiled sheepishly. "Not an auspicious start."

Katara laughed. Zuko added, "I'm glad you can laugh about it now." Now that they were secure in their relationship, they could look back fondly on their hard times; and talking about the past was easier, safer, than contemplating the uncertain future.

"I've wondered something. Where and how did you get your hands on my necklace?"

"I found it at a Fire Nation prison for earthbenders."

"Oh." Katara understood. "I lost it when we rescued Haru and his father and the other earthbenders." She paused, thinking back to those days—the encounters, the chases, the escapes. "I think the next time we saw each other was on the winter solstice, at the Fire Sages' Temple."

Zuko nodded. "Then you stole the waterbending scroll—"

"—and you tried to bribe me with my necklace. That was kind of scary—you were all in my face. For a moment I thought you were going to kiss me." She said the last part without thinking, and immediately blushed.

Zuko grimaced remembering that fateful night. That was the first time he and Katara had gotten up close and personal. And that night had marked the start of a chain of events that forever altered his relationship with Katara.

"I've gone over those days that you were on my ship so many times in my mind. The times we fought … the times we connected … the things Uncle Iroh taught us."

"I felt bad about leaving, but there was no way I could stay, when Aang and Sokka came for me."

"I understand. And I understood then, too. Though I was amazed that you left your necklace for me. I couldn't figure out if you meant for things to stay the way they'd been before you came, or if you wanted to leave something of yours for me."

"I guess both," Katara said with a small shrug. A moment later she giggled.

Zuko looked at her. "What's so funny?"

"I was just remembering," Katara said. "After that, Aang and Sokka and I stopped at this little town where an old fortuneteller lived. She told me about the man I was going to marry."

Zuko's one eyebrow arched high. "Oh? Was that … helpful?"

"She said he would be a very powerful bender."

Zuko smiled smugly at this.

"And …" Katara stopped, a strange expression crossing her face.

"What?"

"I just realized something," Katara said, looking awed. "Something she said that came true …"

"What is it?"

"Aunt Wu told me I would meet obstacles. She said, 'Many forces will work against your union—some external, and some internal.' I didn't understand then. But … I think that was about … how I was so angry with you and refused to trust you when you joined our group. I wouldn't let myself love you again." She blushed a little; the last part had just come out without her thinking.

"So, you really think I'm the man you're going to marry?"

Katara felt a hot blush on her cheeks. Had she been wrong to assume that much? "Well, I …"

"Because frankly, I can't imagine a better future for myself." He shrugged modestly. "I mean, if that's what you want."

"Are we really talking about this?"

"You brought up the fortuneteller's prediction!"

"Right." Their past was a much easier topic than their future. "Then you June use her shirshu to track us down. That's when I got my necklace back."

"And then you got yourself captured by Zhao."

Katara shivered a little at the memory of that confrontation, as Zhao force-fed half-truths to Sokka and Aang.

"Looking back, I think I should have guessed it was you in the mask."

"Why is that?"

"I had you on my mind the whole time. I had to talk things through with both Aang and Sokka, to explain what had happened between us."

"I was surprised you had improved your bending so much. You had the upper hand until the sun came out."

Katara looked sideways at Zuko. "When we went to rescue Aang, Sokka was all for leaving you unconscious in the blizzard. But Aang insisted we take you with us."

Zuko blinked at her. It seemed amazing that his relationships with the members of Team Avatar had changed so drastically. They had once wished him dead, and now Katara wanted him to let her sacrifice herself for him, if necessary.

"I'm sorry I blamed you for what happened to the Moon Spirit," Katara said sorrowfully. "It wasn't fair. I just … I wanted someone to blame, and I was already so angry with you … I took it out on you."

"That's okay," Zuko assured her. He couldn't help thinking that he probably deserved it, that she was probably right about him being at least partly responsible. "So, was that when you got that spirit water?"

"Well, Pakku took some before we left the North Pole, and he gave it to me before we split up. We didn't see you again for a while. We met Azula, Mai and Ty Lee in Omashu, but we didn't know who they were. There was a mix-up with Mai's little brother—have you met him?"

"No. Isn't he still a baby?"

"He's about two years old. Somehow he got caught up in all the people we evacuated from the city. We tried to trade him for King Bumi—the earthbender back at the White Lotus camp—but the deal fell through. We returned him anyway, though."

"I wouldn't expect anything less."

"Toph joined our group next, and we ran into you, Iroh, and Azula just a few days later."

"And you healed Uncle after Azula shot him."

"After that, we both ended up going to Ba Sing Se. I couldn't believe it when you showed up there."

"I couldn't believe I found you there," Katara said. "It was so surreal, seeing you when you hadn't been looking for us." She lowered her eyes, looking off to the side. "But Azula _was_ looking for all of us."

"Yeah." Zuko felt almost as embarrassed as her. "I'm sorry I blamed you after she found us."

"That's okay. It _was_ my fault, more or less."

Neither of them wanted to talk about what had happened next, the darkest day in both of their young lives.

"It's strange," Katara said thoughtfully. "If I had used that water to heal your scar, I wouldn't have been able to revive Aang after Azula shot him. Maybe that's why you had to betray us then." Her started started to go in a circle, wondering whether Zuko would have joined them sooner if she had taken the time to heal him. She shook her head, realizing it was too confusing to think about. "Destiny is strange that way."

"That's what my uncle says. But you know, regardless of what happened afterwards … I'm kind of glad you didn't do it."

Katara was surprised. "Really? Why?"

Zuko raised his hand to his left eye, an old habit. "For the reasons you said, back on Ember Island. It's a sign of who I am—or at least, who I ought to be. I used to think my scar was a sign of disgrace. But after everything that's happened—everything that's changed—now it's a reminder of what had to happen for me to see the truth." He lowered his hand and looked sideways at her, so she could see the scarred side of his face. "You know you're the only person who's touched my scar? I mean, besides the physicians, after the Agni Kai."

Katara glanced at him in slight surprise. "No, I didn't know." She hesitated, then reached out tentatively and touched the scar around his eye. Zuko placed his hand over hers. His hands were always warm—Katara guessed it was a side effect of being a firebender. She dropped her hand, but Zuko held onto it, and they continued holding hands while they reminisced.

"So, the next time we saw each other was on the Day of Black Sun … and then you asked to join our group," Katara said awkwardly. She would have rather not remembered those hostile encounters.

Zuko looked out at the horizon, and then back at her. "When I joined Team Avatar, you were the one whose acceptance I worked the most hard for."

Katara nodded. "I know. I'm sorry …"

"Don't be," Zuko said quickly, taking both of her hands in his. "I just meant … after I became part of the group, I wanted you to like me, even if you didn't love me. I wanted to be your friend, not just your ally."

"You are my friend." Katara's words were simple, her tone sincere.

Zuko bowed his head slightly toward her. "After I went to that meeting, and found out my father's plans for today … I thought about you, when I was trying to decide what to do. You were the first person who tried to show me how wrong this war is. You helped show me that I could choose my own destiny."

Yes, they could choose their destinies—to an extent. But there were people and events that they had no control, that could change their lives no matter what they did, what action they chose to take.

"Do you believe in karma?" Katara asked out of the blue.

Zuko shrugged one shoulder. "I don't know. Do you?"

"I'm not sure. I believe in destiny—that everything happens for a reason. But that seems to conflict with karma, because sometimes bad things happen to a person who doesn't deserve it, because it's supposedly meant to be."

Zuko looked thoughtful. "If karma does exist … I must have done something good."

"What makes you say that?"

"I'm with you," Zuko said simply. He had been given the chance to meet her, fall in love with her, and be with her.

They looked at each other for a moment, and then, at the same moment, they leaned in for a kiss. Zuko pulled her closer to him, touching her face and shoulder. Though it was their last kiss before this pivotal battle, they didn't want it to feel like a kiss good-bye.

When they broke apart, they still held on to each other, their foreheads touching, their breaths mingling in the small space between them. Zuko knew what he wanted to say, but it almost seemed unnecessary at this point. He said it anyway. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

Appa let out a low roar, startling both of them. Despite the fact that they were flying, they'd almost forgotten that they were not alone. "We love you too, Appa," Katara said, patting the bison's head.

"That's not it," Zuko said, looking out at the horizon before them. "He's spotted it." They were approaching the Fire Nation capital. Katara recognized the island from her visit on the Day of Black Sun. "I guess this is it," Zuko said.

"Yeah." Katara looked down at the city, and then back at Zuko. Then she promptly embraced him. For a moment Zuko held her in his strong arms, not wanting to let go; then he gently pushed her away. This was no time to get emotional. They had a job to do.

"Azula can't know about us—about how things are now," Zuko said. "She'll use that as a weakness."

Katara looked at him, something fierce entering her blue eyes. "This isn't weakness." She took his hand in her own, interlacing her fingers with his and squeezing. "This is our strength."

Those words made Zuko feel more confident than he had for a while. He smiled at her, and raised her hand to kiss it. "Shall we?"

"Yes, let's."

Zuko directed Appa to the palace in the heart of the city. They had expected to see more people, but there was only a small group in the plaza: Azula was on her knees, and several Fire Sages stood behind her. One held a golden crown.

In Ozai's absence, they were ready to crown her Fire Lord.

Appa landed in the center of the open area. Zuko stood at once. "Sorry, but you're not going to become Fire Lord today." He leapt from Appa's head onto the ground. "I am."

Azula laughed, as if Zuko were a child expressing a futile idea. "You're hilarious."

Katara came to stand next to Zuko. "And you're going down," she said, glaring up at the Fire Princess.

The head Sage moved as if to put the headpiece in Azula's hair anyway, but she held up her hand and stood. "Wait. You want to be Fire Lord? Fine. Let's settle this. Just you and me, brother. The showdown that was always meant to be. Agni Kai."

Zuko bared his teeth, as though about to spit back some retort; but then he said evenly, "You're on."

Katara turned to him, surprised and concerned. "What are you doing?" she hissed. "She's playing you. She knows he can't fight us both, so she's trying to separate us."

"I know; but I can take her."

Perhaps the Comet's presence gave him a new sense of confidence. After all, it would make him stronger and more powerful than he had ever been. But still—why make it one-on-one when he had her to help? "But even you admitted to your uncle that you couldn't do this alone."

"Something's off about her. I can't explain it, but she's slipping." Zuko turned to look at Katara, his amber eyes determined. "And this way, no one else has to get hurt," he said seriously.

Katara set her jaw. She would not get emotional in front of Azula. If this was what Zuko wanted—or needed—to do, then she would let him do it.

"So, how do you win an Agni Kai?"

"It ends when one opponent burns the other."

Katara was not shocked, but her eyes widened slightly. Zuko shrugged. "I won against Zhao, but I chose not to burn him."

"But Azula won't care—she'd _love_ to burn you to a crisp!"

Zuko shrugged. Katara couldn't believe his nonchalance, until he explained, "If I do get hurt, I'll have you to patch me up."

Katara's eyes were still worried. "Remember what your uncle said about siblings fighting each other? How is this any different?"

"We both have a claim for the throne. This is a legitimate way to determine who inherits it. The Sages will be loyal to whoever wins."

On the other side of the yard, Azula turned to the Fire Sages. "Wait inside. Whichever one of us comes in will be your new Fire Lord." The Sages bowed and filed obediently into the palace.

Katara turned back to Appa. "Go wait outside the plaza," she said clearly, pointing back the way they had come. Appa growled softly, but she stroked his muzzle to comfort it. "Don't worry, we'll be okay. I have to stay here, to make sure Zuko's okay."

"Just go already!" Zuko said impatiently. The last thing they needed was for a bison to get burned and go on a rampage across the capitol. Katara shot him a look, but Appa obliged, slapping his tail against the ground and lifting off. They could hear him only a short distance away, perhaps a block or two.

Katara wanted to kiss him, or touch his face, do something to wish him good luck. But she wasn't going to show that kind of affection in front of Azula. All she did was touch his arm, in what she hoped was a supportive gesture, before walking back to the shade under the roof. There, she found the sewers Zuko had told her about.

Zuko and Azula each knelt down at opposite ends of the plaza, their backs facing each other. Then they stood and turned to look at each other.

"I'm sorry it has to end this way, brother," Azula said, throwing off her cloak carelessly.

"No, you're not," Zuko said, already steady in a defensive stance.

Naturally, Azula made the first move, sending a jet of blue fire toward Zuko, larger and brighter than any they'd seen her make before. But Zuko was ready and sent his own red and orange fire to deflect hers. The two colors clashed halfway between the siblings.

Katara could only watch in fascination. The fire was spectacular—in different circumstances, she would have unhesitatingly called it beautiful. She had seen Zuko firebend before, in training and in combat, including the times when he'd fought against her. What was amazing about this fight was seeing the two forms of firebending clash, seeing which was stronger.

She remembered their duel over the Spirit Oasis, and realized that the only thing more destructive than a battle between opposites was a battle between two of the same kind of force. Fighting fire with fire only made a greater inferno.

She wondered if she would ever be able to look at a campfire or candlelight the same way, after seeing fire of this magnitude.

Zuko and Azula seemed evenly matched, until finally Zuko took an opportunity to go on the offensive, sending blasts that knocked Azula to the ground. The powerful princess pushed herself to her feet, and for the first time Katara could see how broken she now looked. Even from a distance, she could see a frenzied desperation in the other girl.

"No lightning today?" Zuko called out. "What's the matter? Afraid I'll redirect it?"

Katara wanted to pull at her hair. _Don't egg her on, Zuko!_ She started to run forward, but stopped at the edge of the imaginary ring.

Azula snarled in between her gasps, "I'll show you lightning!"

Katara had some idea of what would happen now; she had seen Iroh teach Zuko, and watched Zuko teach Aang. As long as his mind was calm, the lightning didn't go through his heart, and he released the energy properly …

A sudden, terrifying thought occurred to her: what if he redirected it back to Azula?

Zuko might not mind doing it, but Aang would never approve.

"Don't kill her!" Zuko froze in his stance, hearing her shout. "There's got to be another way!" Zuko didn't dare to look back at her; he kept his eyes fixed on Azula, who had electricity crackling at her outstretched fingertips.

Then, incredibly, she smiled. "She's right," Azula said, "there is another way to do this."

Zuko didn't understand; he kept his stance, and behind him he heard the slosh of water as Katara drew her element to herself. Then Azula made her move—

But she wasn't aiming at him. She was aiming—the lightning was moving—past him, toward—

Katara saw it coming, and knew better than to use water against electricity; she dropped her element and turned to run; Zuko screamed but she couldn't understand it—

From behind her came force and heat and pain like she had never felt—

* * *

><p>Zuko had screamed at other times in his life. The most memorable instance was at his first Agni Kai, when he felt his father's fiery blow on his face. Subsequent times he had screamed out of rage, often producing flames as a side effect.<p>

This scream was different, as he saw the lightning hit Katara, lighting her body with electricity and blasting her to the ground. This scream had pain and rage and despair, but it had something else, too—guilt. It couldn't happen—no, it _should not_ happen—if he must die, fine, but not Katara, she was innocent, and unrelated to the animosity between Zuko and Azula.

He lashed out with more anger now, his fire more ferocious as a result. He blew Azula clear across the courtyard; she landed on the roof, and then fell to the ground. She was down, if only for a moment.

He ran to Katara, skidded as he landed on his knees beside her. Her long hair was singed, and the back of her tunic had been burned away; he could see a horrible wound on her back, unnaturally red against her light brown skin. He turned her so she was lying on her back; her eyes were closed, but her mouth was slightly ajar. Her gloves had been blasted off, and he could see a burn mark on her right hand, where the lightning had exited.

Zuko consciously fought the paralysis that was threatening his mind and body. If he got Katara to water, maybe she could heal herself unconsciously. He felt for a pulse in her wrist, in her neck, even over her heart; he pressed a hand on her stomach, hoping to feel it rise and fall; but he couldn't feel any pulse, any heartbeat, any involuntary movement of breath. _Oh, spirits_ … was she already dead? No—she had said there might be a way—

If lightning had stopped her heart, could lightning also be used to restart it?

He glanced across the yard and saw Azula wobbling on her feet, starting back toward him. Zuko had never been able to make lightning, and he doubted he could do it now; he didn't have the peace of mind; he was too furious at his sister, too afraid for Katara, too ashamed that he hadn't stopped this. He couldn't make lightning now. But there was one person there who could.

He stood up and took a few steps away from Katara, as though going to meet Azula halfway. "You missed me!"

"Good! You got to see her die first!"

"Go ahead, then!" Zuko was screaming at her, falling prostrate on his knees, flinging his arms wide open. "Finish it! Finish me!"

Azula already had electricity sparking from her fingertips. The deranged smile never left her face as she threw the lightning toward him.

Zuko moved so quickly she could hardly register it, as he smoothly leapt to his feet in time to catch the lightning, pivot, and redirect it at the fallen waterbender.

* * *

><p>For a moment Katara didn't know whether she had been unconscious, and she was just feeling the same painful, heated jolt as before, or whether it was a second, separate one. But then, she turned her head—the only thing she could move—and saw Zuko standing a few yards away, still in a lightning redirection stance, his arms extended toward her. It took her a split second to remember what Azula had done and understand what Zuko had done.<p>

"Zuko."

His exhale was almost a gasp. "Katara."

He knelt down next to her again, this time helping her sit up. She gasped in pain. "My back—"

"It's okay." He put a hand over her heart, and this time he could feel it beating, irregular but resilient. "You're okay."

Azula was panting, drained from those two lightning blasts, and aghast at seeing her victim alive—resurrected, it seemed. Was she, or was Zuko, something more than human?

Zuko. He was the one with the power to save. He was the one she needed to destroy.

Katara's eyes widened when she saw Azula turn on them again. "Zuko, look out!"

He looked away from her in time to see Azula coming toward them. He was on his feet instantly, running to get between the two girls. Katara watched in horror as Zuko tried to change stances, getting between the lightning and her. She felt overwhelmed with déjà vu; it was just as it had been when Azula struck Aang with lightning. The lightning struck Zuko, and the next thing she knew, Zuko was skidding on the ground. He curled up in the fetal position, clutching his chest. Electricity flickered on his body, and then it stopped, and he went limp.

"_Zuko!_" Katara screamed. She started to run, but then had to jump to avoid a double blast of blue fire and lightning aimed at her. Azula laughed maniacally, a deranged smile on her face. Katara realized that Zuko was right: Azula was no longer entirely sane. To Katara, she was scarier than ever.

"_I swear, Katara, you'll be the death of me_."

Zuko was lying on his stomach now. He pushed against the ground in a valiant attempt to get up. Katara gasped, seeing Zuko was alive but fearing that he didn't have much longer. She tried again to run to him, but Azula blasted more blue fire in her direction; she would have to defend herself first.

Zuko slumped against the ground again; he didn't have the strength to get up. Was this how Aang had felt when Azula struck him with lightning? Guilt coursed through Zuko again as he felt the pain for himself. Aang had probably had it worse, since he had been in the Avatar State when Azula shot him.

_I'm sorry, Aang. I'm sorry, Katara. I let you down … again …_

He could hear Iroh and Katara's voices simultaneously scolding and encouraging him. _Don't think like that! Don't give up! Even if it is your time, at least …_

At least he had been able to return home for a while. At least he had been able to spend time with Mai and Ty Lee, his childhood friends. At least he had stood up to his father. At least he had learned the truth about what happened to his mother. At least he had made amends with Aang, Katara, Sokka, Toph, and Suki. At least he had earned their trust and friendship. At least he had passed his firebending knowledge on to Aang. At least he had gotten back together with Katara, and helped her come to terms with her mother's death. At least he had restored his honor. At least he had reconciled with his uncle. At least he and Katara had had a chance to reminisce about their past. At least Aang might manage to defeat his father. At least Katara was here to finish off Azula. At least there was hope.

Zuko remembered the words he had spoken to his father at the war meeting before the Day of Black Sun. _"The Earth Kingdom people are proud and strong. They can endure anything, as long as they have hope."_ It was Iroh who had told him that the people of the Earth Kingdom were proud and strong. He remembered Iroh explaining to him and Katara, _"It is important to draw wisdom from many different places. If you take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale. Understanding others, the other elements, will help you become whole."_

_I did, Uncle. I drew wisdom from you—you taught me so much. I drew wisdom from the element earth—I was strong, persistent, enduring. I gave myself hope, and I didn't give up. I drew wisdom from the element water—I adapted to life as a member of Team Avatar. I drew wisdom from Katara—she told me not to lose hope, and to forgive myself._

Zuko thought back to those days when his only goal was to capture the Avatar. He had believed that capturing the Avatar would be his baptism by fire, cleansing him of his sins and redeeming him. _This_ was his baptism by fire—literally. He had redeemed himself in a completely different way; he had been cleansed of his real sins.

Despite the pain, Zuko felt calmer, more at peace. He had done everything he could for his friends and his country. If it was his time, well, at least he could die trying to make the world a better place. He remembered the inscription on the knife Iroh had given to him long ago—_Never give up without a fight_. That was exactly what he had done, what he was doing. His mother would be proud.

Was it Yue who had said, "There is no love without sacrifice"? Zuko remembered comparing himself to her, long ago. Maybe he could be like her, after all.

* * *

><p>Katara was getting desperate. No, she <em>was<em> desperate. She had to get to Zuko, had to heal him—but she also had to defeat Azula—and Azula was preventing her from getting to Zuko—

As she hid behind a pillar, watching the blue fire spurt out on either side, she prayed to every ancestor and spirit she could think of—her mother, Yue the Moon Spirit, the Ocean Spirit, the past Avatars, Jet and his parents, and even Iroh's son, Lu Ten. _Help me!_

She had to defend Zuko―but what if she was too easy a target? She wasn't sure she was strong enough to fight, her body was so sore and her back felt like a festering wound; and even if she went on some adrenaline high, she might crash later, and she needed her energy to heal Zuko …

It was a miracle that she could think straight in situations like this.

She tried to feel the water through the grates. Yes: she could bend, though it took twice the usual amount of effort, and every movement of her arms painfully stretched the wounded skin on her back. She couldn't expend her energy by going after Azula in the ring; she had to draw Azula to her.

She looked around, wary now that the fire had stopped; and then she spotted something Zuko hadn't mentioned: chains resting on a hook. She pieced together a plan quickly, one that wouldn't require her to move much—she only had to get Azula—

"There you are, you filthy peasant." Azula was walking toward the roofed walkway, her expression halfway between a glare and a smile. She didn't seem to notice the chains Katara held in one hand. "What hurts more: that he failed to protect you, or that he's dying in a vain attempt to save you?"

Katara panted slightly, but then set her jaw. _It's not in vain, and he's NOT dying!_

She feigned a water strike toward Azula, prompting her to step onto the grate. Azula started to thrust forward, her fingers poised to strike, when Katara threw her arms up on either side, surrounding the two of them with water and freezing it instantaneously.

They stayed frozen in the ice for several seconds before Katara exhaled the breath she had taken, bending just enough ice into water so that she could move while Azula stayed immobile. She circled Azula, wrapped the chain around the firebender's wrists, and tied it around the metal grate. Finally, when her own lungs were just starting to burn, she threw her arms down, allowing the water to fall back into the sewers.

Both girls gasped for air, but Katara moved quickly to tighten the chains through grate, and spoke through gritted teeth. "You—stay—away—from—my—Zuko!"

"Too—late," Azula seethed. "I got him and you can't save him."

"Oh, I forgot you don't know. I'm a healer. That's why Aang survived when you thought you'd killed him." In her head, in her heart, she said more: _I love them. I'll never stop healing or fighting for them. As long as I'm alive, the world isn't going to lose either of them_. She didn't have time to say all that now. She left Azula and hurried to Zuko, who still lay facedown on the ground.

Katara turned him over, saw his ripped shirt and the raw wound on his abdomen. He seemed semi-conscious, his eyes lidded. She bent the nearby water onto her hands, and pressed them gently on his stomach.

_"All we ever do is say good-bye."_ She had said that to him, once. But now she told herself, _Not this time_.

She could feel the energy, the chi and electricity that had taken a wrong turn in his body. Remedying it was like unblocking someone's chi, allowing it to flow properly, balancing the positive and negative energy. At the same time, she tried to speed the healing of his external wound, pushing away thoughts about the wound she must have on her back.

Zuko's first reaction was to wince as the pain intensified; but then his grimace faded, and his body relaxed. Katara turned to him, smiling and gaping at the same time. "Zuko," she whispered.

His eyes opened fully then, and came to focus on her. "Katara." Her name came out in a croak.

She wanted to throw herself on top of him, hug him and never let go—but the gaping wound on his front stopped her. Instead she kissed his cheeks, his lips, his forehead, to make up for not really holding him; but then he hugged her around the neck, holding her down, though he was careful to avoid touching the wound on her back. They were both shaken and weak from their injuries; it was all they could do to hold on to each other. They both had the thought that they should never let go.

"Thank you," he whispered.

Happy, relieved tears filled Katara's eyes. "I think I'm the one who should be thanking you," she returned.

Zuko sat up slowly, with Katara supporting his back. He looked at her in amazement. "You're really alright? I'm—am I really alive? And you?"

"_Yes_," Katara said, smiling tearfully, almost as incredulous as him. She hugged his shoulders, trying to hold him without hurting him. His hands tried to grasp her too.

Their euphoria was interrupted by Azula's ineffable screams. They both tensed in fear, expecting another blow; and Azula did spew blue fire from her mouth; but it lasted only a moment, before she dissolved into agonized sobs. The Fire Princess had been defeated—yet the two victors didn't feel any joy from that. The mad girl's suffering was a dark blanket on their happiness at being alive.

"You know what this means?" Katara said after a moment. Zuko looked at her. "It means you're stronger than her. You never went crazy, even through all your suffering, all your failures … you stayed strong."

"Speak for yourself." Zuko pushed her hair back, away from the tear in the back of her dress. How had she managed to trap Azula when she was in such pain? "You're still hurt. You have to heal yourself."

Katara nodded. She couldn't see her own wound, but she could feel the pain in her back―about the same spot where Aang had been scarred by Azula's lightning. She formed the water into a glove around her hand and pressed it against her back, hissing at the sting of contact―but then the sting softened, just as her past burns had.

"Is it bad?"

Zuko's hand rested on her back, but away from the wound itself. "It's … like mine. You have a scar." He had managed to save her life, but she had not been unscathed.

Somehow, incredibly, she smiled at this. "I guess that makes us even."

"No. I told Sokka I'd protect you, and I failed."

"If you insist on seeing it that way, you made up for it by saving me."

"But then you saved me, so I'm in your debt again."

Katara touched his face, wiping away traces of sweat and what may have been tears. "Remember what I said about owing? It doesn't matter. We fight for each other. That's what we do for the people we love."

Maybe she was right. Zuko wasn't sure he would ever be worth the trouble and trials he put her through. But he loved her more than anything, and if she loved him, he wouldn't deny her access to him. He would be whatever she wanted him to be to her.

As he looked at her—with her cuts and scorch marks and singed hair and torn clothes—Zuko realized that sometimes there were no words that could describe one's thoughts or emotions. So he kissed her, to show her as best he could. Katara understood, and kissed him back.

They were exhausted and battered and physically scarred, probably for life. But they were alive, and victorious, and safe. And after saving each other—after being saved by each other—their resolve was stronger than ever.

It wasn't about owing—they pushed away such thoughts now, knowing that they were pointless. It was about wanting to be worthy of such sacrifice. If he believed she was worth it, then she would live as though she were. They would show each other their gratitude every day for the rest of their lives.

* * *

><p>Music: "Last Agni Kai" by Jeremy Zuckerman, and "Something Good" from <em>The Sound of Music<em>

Artwork: "Momentous" by soulxconspiracy, "When the Sky Falls" by SinKatt, "Zutara: The Real World" by elionora, "Zutara Week: Blood" by FluffyInu94

Author's Note: I wanted to get this chapter up before starting the new school year, since studying is going to take up most of my focus for a while. If you've kept up with _The Legend of Korra_, you must have heard Iroh cite the proverb about "finding what you aren't looking for." I was very pleasantly surprised to hear it! I want to make it clear, I was planning this _before_ I saw the _Legend of Korra_ Book 3 finale. I was pretty surprised to see water and lightning play out the way they did onscreen. I'm still kind of recovering from watching that finale; I hope reading this wasn't as traumatic for you readers as watching Korra was for me. There are still more surprises to come, more deviations from canon, one of which you might be able to guess if you've paid attention throughout this story.


	49. A New Era

_Published December 21, 2014. Happy Hanukkah, winter solstice, Christmas, and New Year!_

"A New Era"

In the end, maybe we must all give up trying to pay back the people in this world who sustain our lives. In the end, maybe it's wiser to surrender before the miraculous scope of human generosity and to just keep saying thank you, forever and sincerely, for as long as we have voices. ~ Elizabeth Gilbert

The comet faded from the sky, but by then it was nighttime, and the sun was already setting.

Once Katara had healed herself and Zuko to the best of her ability, they had to go inside to address the Fire Sages. Zuko let Katara wear his vest over her dress, which had more or less burned away on the back.

"What if they turn against you?" Katara whispered as they limped together toward the palace.

"I doubt they will. Even Azula told them to follow whoever summons them now."

Zuko knocked on the grand doors, feeling a little foolish. No one ever _knocked_ on these doors, they were supposed to be opened and closed by guards. It took the Sages a minute to push open a heavy door together. They looked at Zuko, standing with his clothes ripped, a hand braced against a pillar to steady himself.

"It's over," he said, his words clear and authoritative. "Azula has been defeated, and she's in no state to rule anyone. My father relinquished the title of Fire Lord, so you will crown me as the new Fire Lord. For now, I ask you to swear your loyalty to me, so I know I can trust you. But I won't force you to swear. Anyone who won't follow me is free to leave in peace."

He need not have said so much: the Sages seemed accepting. "You fought with honor, Prince Zuko. We will follow you."

The Fire Sages knelt down one or two at a time and spoke in unison, words that they had professed before. "By the fire of the dragons, in the sight of men and spirits, we swear to do as you command."

Zuko's first command was practical: "Find a physician." He glanced at Katara. "I know you're a healer, but I'd still like someone to check on your back."

"Your Highness," one of the Sages said. "Princess Azula banished the entire staff—servants, imperial firebenders, Dai Li agents. We alone remain."

Zuko was surprised, and furrowed his good eyebrow in confusion. "Why would she?" What was the point of being a ruler if there was nobody to rule over?

"She feared someone would betray her," another offered.

Of course, Zuko thought. "Like Mai," he said. Katara looked at him and understood, remembering his account of the Boiling Rock rescue. If one of Azula's closest, most trusted friends had turned against her, she had no way of knowing who she could trust. Not for the first time, they pitied the girl.

"We need to keep her someplace safe, where she can't hurt anyone."

"I don't think an average or even maximum-security prison would keep her contained."

"I think a mental health facility is what she really needs. There's so much to do …"

"You need to rest," Katara insisted.

"Just let me think this through." Zuko glanced at the head Sage. "There must still be guards at the prison, right?"

"Yes, Your Highness."

Zuko bit his lip. "Katara, are you strong enough to take Appa a short distance?"

"Sure."

"Then you and two Sages should go to the prison. You can release your allies and bring back some manpower to put Azula away. They know how to handle … hard cases."

She nodded. "I can do that."

"Tell your friends they can stay in the palace. Aside from that, I think all we can do is wait to hear from the others about who won."

It took two hours to fly to the prison, go through the cells identifying the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribe allies, and return to the plaza with half a dozen trained firebender guards. For Katara, it felt both fleeting and never-ending. The Fire Sages had to explain that there was a new Fire Lord, and convince the guards to comply with his orders. To Katara's relief, it did not take much to convince them.

The Kyoshi Warriors, her Earth Kingdom friends, and her own tribesmen were thrilled to see her, and ecstatic at being told they were free. They all demanded: "Does this mean the war's over?" "Did you win?"

"I think so," Katara kept saying, and had to explain repeatedly that they had won on one front and were waiting for news of the other two. She also had to tell Bato, the Mechanist, Tyro, and Pipsqueak that Team Avatar had separated from Hakoda, Teo, Haru, and The Duke. "Well find them as soon as we can, though."

"Water Tribe girl! The Avatar's friend!" Someone called out to her from a cell further down. "It is I, Shyu!"

"Shyu?" Katara studied him, and then it clicked in her mind. "Shyu! Of course! You escaped Roku's temple, then." She turned to the guards. "Set him free, too."

"And the other Sages from Roku's temple?"

Katara hesitated, remembering that Shyu's peers had sided with Zuko, but fought against Aang. "I guess … I'll ask Zuko about the others. They need to decide if they're willing to serve the new Fire Lord."

One of the Kyoshi Warriors—barely recognizable as one without the uniform or makeup—touched her shoulder. "There are two Fire Nation girls here who turned traitor. They should be let out, too."

Katara blinked at her, remembering the only two Fire Nation traitors she knew of. "Show me."

The young woman led her to a long cell that several girls had shared, and pointed at two girls at the end of the room. Katara could just make them out in the torchlight. "Mai? Ty Lee?"

Mai recognized her. "You."

"You're the Water Tribe girl," Ty Lee remembered.

"The name's Katara. So, Azula put you here?"

"Yeah."

"Zuko told us what you did, Mai—but why'd she put you here, Ty Lee?"

"I chi-blocked Azula when she was about to attack Mai."

"Really? Wow. I'm … sorry you ended up here." Katara meant it, too. It took courage to stand up to Azula—maybe even more so in their case, since Azula had been their friend.

"Why are you here?" Mai asked.

"I'm letting you out."

Ty Lee sat up straight, wide-eyed, some of her old excitement coming back. "Really?"

"The war's over—or almost over. Zuko's going to be the Fire Lord, and he sent me to liberate prisoners of war."

Mai suddenly seemed more alert. "Zuko. He's alive?"

"Yes. I'll explain later."

The Sages hesitated when they saw Azula's former allies. "Master waterbender, these two are from the Fire Nation."

"I know them. They're allies too. Mai saved Prince Zuko when Princess Azula was going to let him die. I'm sure he wants them free."

The Sages backed off and let the girls walk out of the prison.

"Thanks for that," Mai said.

"I owe it to you," Katara said. "You saved my father and brother, as well as Zuko. Thank you for that."

"It wasn't for your benefit … but you're welcome."

Katara turned to the other girl. "Ty Lee, can you come with us to the palace? We need to transport Azula here, and it would be a lot easier if we blocked her chi first."

"Um … I don't think seeing me will help Azula much. But, you can take any of the Kyoshi Warriors. I've been teaching them how to block chi."

"All right. Everyone else can go to the palace on foot—it's mostly empty, there's more than enough room for everyone."

So Appa carried Katara, two Kyoshi Warriors, two Fire Sages, and three guards to the plaza. Azula was still chained, but had ceased crying and shouting. She was just as tired as Katara and Zuko, but unlike them, she had no reason to keep pushing herself forward. She had lost.

"I'll go with them," Zuko told Katara. "You can stay here." He did not want to leave Azula under anyone else's supervision until she was secured in prison, in case anyone decided to support her instead of him.

Katara wanted to wait on the steps until he came back, but she almost fell asleep leaning against a column. Bato found her and led her, half-asleep, to what seemed to be a guest bedroom, where the Kyoshi Warriors had set up a sort of camp. No one seemed sure of what was allowed, but Katara went ahead and collapsed onto the bed, falling asleep instantly.

* * *

><p>She was the last to wake in the morning, and then only when Ty Lee shook her awake. "Zuko said to get you. There's food in the kitchens, if you're hungry. Everyone else already ate."<p>

Katara ached more now than on any other morning. "What time is it?"

"Almost noon. Come on, I can show you the way."

A table laden with food—few prepared dishes, mostly basic ingredients—was set up in the cavernous kitchen. With the servants gone, it seemed like a free-for-all. "Is it really okay to have this?"

"Zuko said so."

"Where is he?"

"Most people are hanging out in the throne room, or in the plaza. Zuko sent a few people to watch for airships or messenger hawks with news. Or invaders, in case the Avatar lost and the Fire Lord sent troops back here." Katara froze at this, but Ty Lee barely paused. "But we don't know what happened, so he's not sure what to expect."

"I get it." Katara piled some fruit and dried meat on a plate, and followed Ty Lee to the throne room. Earthbenders, swampbenders, and Water Tribe warriors sat in loose circles on the floor. Zuko was in a conversation with Bato, Tyro, and Shyu. He glanced up at Katara, then said something to Tyro, and stood to leave the circle. He came over to sit next to Katara. "How are you?"

"All right. And yourself?"

"All right."

"You didn't have to leave—"

"It's fine, we've been talking all morning. No one's really sure what to think of this situation. I told them that they're free to go, just as much as they're free to stay. I'm not going to kick anyone out. A few people went to the harbor to try to arrange passage home."

Katara glanced around the room, noticing that one girl was missing. "Where's Mai?"

"She didn't come last night. Ty Lee said she went back to her house, where her family is."

Katara looked around the room, chewing her food. "So … this is where you grew up. The home you wanted to come back to."

"Actually, before I was the Crown Prince, I grew up in a villa outside the palace. But the capital itself was the only home I'd ever known."

"'Was'?" Katara looked at him curiously.

Zuko was silent for a moment, thinking about the truth and significance of his words, before speaking. "I never thought I'd say this, but my ship was, kind of, my home for a while. Even more so, living with you guys, these past few weeks … I mean, when I wasn't on some mission, and everyone had time to spend together … it felt like being part of a family. And that felt kind of like having a home."

Katara smiled, touched. Zuko smiled back, then ran his hand over a wall. "I guess home means having a place where you know you belong. I felt that with you and our friends; and I feel it here—now that I know I'm supposed to be here." He hadn't felt at home last time, because some part of him had known that he wasn't supposed to be there while the war was still being fought.

"Katara. Prince Zuko." One of the earthbenders from Haru and Tyro's village came up to them. "A Fire Nation airship is approaching the island."

The two teenagers looked at each other for a split second before jumping to their feet. They could not run with their fresh injuries, but they walked as fast as they could to the plaza. They took Appa and flew over the volcano's rim, and saw the blimp land at its base.

"Do you think it's them?" Katara asked.

"I doubt it's anyone from the Fire Nation," Zuko said. "If they wanted to attack or search for us, there would be a lot more of them."

They steered Appa close and landed a mere twenty yards away from the ship. They stood ready to fight, watching as the door opened.

"Who goes there?" Zuko shouted. "Identify yourself!"

"SURPRISE!" That was Sokka's voice. Suki and Toph came out supporting him between them. "We won, and we survived!"

"Guys!" Katara rushed forward, but stopped when she saw Sokka's leg wrapped in rudimentary bandages. "Sokka, you're hurt!"

"After last night, I'm just glad to be alive!" Sokka laughed.

Zuko was in no way glad that Sokka was injured, but it reassured him, made him think that it might widen Sokka's perspective, so that he might not mind his sister's injury as much. As he thought this Sokka was still going on excitedly, while Katara hugged him and each of the girls. "You should have seen us, jumping from one blimp to another—Toph was fantastic with her metalbending—Suki disappeared but she came back in time to save our lives—and the whole time, Aang was below us, doing amazing airbending and firebending and then something I've never seen before—"

"Energybending." Aang walked calmly down the ramp of the blimp.

_"Aang!"_ Katara ran up the ramp and threw her arms around him.

Over his shoulder, she could see a couple Fire Nation soldiers carried out a limp, almost catatonic man, just barely recognizable from Zuko's family portrait. It was Ozai, in the flesh.

The former Fire Lord looked up in time to see Zuko walk up to the child Avatar and embrace him like a brother. "I'm glad you're okay," Zuko said, his eyes closed and a smile on his face. Then he looked up, and froze in shock.

Father and son spoke in unison: "You."

"I didn't think I'd see you again." Zuko shot Aang a nonplussed look.

"You don't have to worry," Aang said, looking back at Ozai. "He can't hurt anyone, now. I took his firebending away."

"What?"

"How?" Katara asked.

"It's a long story, but it turned out I was right. Violence wasn't the only option."

"Hey, Loser Lord," Toph said loudly. "This is Katara, the girl who defeated your daughter. She may end up being your daughter-in-law."

Katara swatted Toph's bun. "Toph!"

Ozai's eyes darted up. "Who—?" He saw Zuko put his arm protectively around the girl dressed in blue and red. She put her arm around his waist and met Ozai's gaze steadily, with no trace of fear. Ozai glared at them both. "As if you hadn't betrayed your family enough—"

"_This_ is my family," Zuko retorted, keeping one arm around Katara and putting another over Aang's shoulders. "They gave me their love and support. And you? You took every opportunity to remind me of how worthless and pathetic I was. Except it was all a lie."

"What should we do with him, sir?" one of the soldiers supporting Ozai asked.

"Take him to the prison. Put him in solitary." He looked back to his friends. "Suki and Toph, you go with them." His unspoken words were, _Make sure it's done_.

"Come back to the palace after," Katara added. "The other Kyoshi Warriors are there."

They watched as Toph bent an earthen platform and moved it up the slope of the volcano. Aang bent a much smaller column up to help Sokka board Appa's saddle. "So, I'm assuming you guys took care of Azula?" Sokka asked.

"She's in jail," Katara confirmed.

"Actually, I'm planning to send her to a mental health facility," Zuko said.

"Were you guys okay fighting her?" Aang asked. His question was met with an uncomfortable silence as Katara and Zuko avoided their eyes.

"Show them, Katara."

"Zuko—"

"At least tell them."

"_You_ saw it happen, while I was blacking out. You tell them."

Zuko sighed and explained. "Azula struck both of us, at different times. She got Katara first"—at this, Aang and Sokka's mouths dropped open, equally shocked and horrified—"and I'm pretty sure the lightning killed her—she wasn't breathing, until I redirected Azula's next blast to jumpstart her heart."

"Like you taught us!" Aang exclaimed, remembering Katara's words during his last lesson with Zuko.

"You knew they could do that?" Sokka said, looking to his sister in confusion.

"It was just a theory," Katara said. "I got the idea from something in the spirit library."

Aang looked at Katara with concern. "When Azula struck me, it left me scarred," he said. "Are you—?"

"That's what I meant by 'show them'," Zuko clarified.

Katara touched her shoulder, which was still covered by Zuko's jacket. "It's on my back."

The others looked at her with sympathy. Then Sokka spoke up, his tone indicating a complaint. "You guys are kind of lucky. Aang, Zuko, Katara, you've got battle scars that you can brag about for years to come. I've just got a busted leg that'll heal in a few months. Once I'm walking on my own no one will remember I was in this battle."

Aang snickered, while Zuko rolled his eyes. Katara just looked at him dourly. "Sokka, of all the things you could complain about …"

"I'm not!" he insisted innocently. "I'm trying to put a positive spin on your suffering."

"I'm sorry. I promised to look out for her, but I let get hurt. I let you down."

Sokka's eyes were sympathetic, just as they had been during their hot-air balloon journey. "Honestly, you did a better job of protecting your girlfriend than I did of protecting mine. Suki fell onto a different airship and there was nothing I could do to help her. She was the one who ended up rescuing me."

"I guess that's no different from Katara rescuing me." Zuko fingered the bandage on his front.

"I thought equality was already part of our relationships," Katara said. "There's nothing wrong with being saved."

"We never said there was," Zuko said.

That evening, a hawk arrived with a message bearing the names and fingerprints of every member of the White Lotus. Zuko gave the parchment one sniff and confirmed, "That's Uncle Iroh. It's authentic, all right."

"So Ba Sing Se is free!" Aang rejoiced.

"We'll have to track down the Earth King, let him know the good news," Sokka remembered.

"June can help us find him," Zuko said.

"Should we wait until then before your coronation?" Katara suggested.

"No. We need to make Zuko an official leader before anyone tries to oppose him."

"We actually did it." Toph smiled at the floor. "The six of us and five old men ended a century-long war." Toph was smug. "And you were all worried we were going to die."

"Katara and I almost did!" Zuko protested.

"I thought Suki had!" Sokka exclaimed. "And then you and I almost did. Admit it, when we were dangling from the airship, you thought we were going to die too."

"Now the real work begins," Zuko said seriously.

"It'll still be easier than anything we'd had to do in the past year."

Zuko and the Fire Sages prepared messenger hawks to deliver letters to the White Lotus at Ba Sing Se, and to every major Fire Nation city and military station, informing them of the transfer of power, the end of the war, and the date for Zuko's coronation, set for a week later. Hopefully their remaining allies would hear the news and be able to return to Caldera for Zuko's coronation.

"Remind me to go see my father when I have the time."

Katara blinked at him. "Why? I thought you wanted him gone."

"Yeah, but he might know something important. He might know where my mother is."

"Right. That's one more journey we have to make."

It wasn't that they didn't have to worry about the future; now they could be certain that they _had_ a future to worry about. They took comfort and drew confidence from that.

* * *

><p>While most of the liberated prisoners stayed in the palace or the nearby villas, Mai settled back into her home, which, unlike some of the other houses in Caldera, had not been damaged by the flames from Zuko and Azula's Agni Kai. Her parents and brother had returned there after fleeing Omashu, and while they were glad that she was free, they were devastated at the news that Ozai had fallen. They said Ty Lee could stay at their house, but they refused to give the Kyoshi Warriors any hospitality, so she had decided to stay with the group in one of the palace villas.<p>

"I have a summons from Prince Zuko. He would like to see you at midday."

Mai was surprised, but her parents were astounded. "What could this mean?"

"Ignore it, Mai," her father said.

"She can't do that," her mother insisted. "To all intents and purposes, Zuko is the Fire Lord. She cannot disobey him."

"I'm going," Mai said loudly, "because _I_ want to go, and no other reason." She did not owe Zuko anything. But, she was curious about how he was, and what he planned to do now that the war was supposedly over.

She went to the palace on foot. Lo and Li led her to a simple conference room, a far cry from the Fire Lord's throne room, where she knew most war meetings happened. The room was not empty, though: a Water Tribe boy sat at the table, one of his legs wrapped in a cast, with a crutch across his lap. Mai stopped at the threshold, staring at him. "You."

Sokka whipped his head to the side, and straightened up when he saw the girl in the doorway. "Mai?"

"What are you doing here?" they asked at the same time.

"I was invited," Sokka said, just a little defensive.

"So was I."

"Huh." They looked at each other, equally unsure of how to act, before Sokka resumed his seat. Mai shrugged and followed suit, sitting at an angle so they wouldn't have to stare at each other across the table.

"So … any idea why Zuko invited us?" Sokka asked.

"No. What's your name again?"

"Sokka."

"Are you and the … _Katara_ related?"

"Yeah, she's my sister."

"I see. Did you know that the baby you kidnapped in Omashu was my brother?"

"Wha—okay, first of all, no, I didn't know you were related. Second, we didn't kidnap him! He must've gotten swept up during the evacuation."

"Yeah, I'm sure he just crawled outside and followed you."

"I'm not making this up!"

"Guys!" They looked up and saw Zuko standing in the doorway. He closed the door and faced them, looking stern. "You can't be fighting now."

"Hello to you too," Mai said. "Glad to see you survived."

"We both did, thanks to you. You have my thanks—and Sokka's too, I'm sure."

"Yeah … sure."

Zuko sat down with them. "We can't dwell on all the ways we hurt each other. The war's over and from now on we have to move forward."

"What's this all about?" Mai asked.

"I have an important job that I want to entrust to you two, but for it to work, you'll have to cooperate with each other. I need you to interview the people Azula banished—the servants, the imperial firebenders—and others who can serve me as the new Fire Lord."

"Why us?" Sokka asked.

"I trust you two. Mai, you know a lot about Fire Nation society and the people who've always worked in the capital. And Sokka, you're impartial, so you can judge based on what they say instead of who they are. Plus, everyone else I trust will be pretty busy. The White Lotus are still holding things together in Ba Sing Se."

Sokka shrugged with a slight smile. "Okay. I'm in."

Mai's shrug was indifferent. "I have nothing else to do."

"Great. You can start as soon as tomorrow."

Sokka left to study his list of people, hobbling out on his crutch. Mai also stood to leave, but Zuko stopped her. "Mai, do you have a minute? I've been wanting to talk to you."

She resumed her seat but said nothing.

"It's really good to see you," Zuko offered.

"You too."

"I was worried, after we escaped the Boiling Rock. You didn't have to do that."

She smiled then, for the first time in a long time. "That was kind of the point. It was the first time I did something that I didn't have to do."

Zuko smiled too. "I wouldn't be here if it hadn't been for you. So, thank you."

"You're welcome."

"I heard Ty Lee is going to join the Kyoshi Warriors. Are you thinking of doing the same?"

"They invited me, but I haven't decided." Mai knew her parents still hoped she would marry some high-ranking Fire Nation official. They would be scandalized if she joined an Earth Kingdom organization. That made the option seem kind of tempting. But she had hated wearing the uniform and makeup back in Ba Sing Se.

"I know your family had to leave Omashu after King Bumi took it back. Obviously, your father can't be the governor anymore. But I think I can give him a different government position."

"I'll tell him that."

"I still feel bad about what happened at the Boiling Rock. I'm indebted to you. So if there's ever anything you need, if it's in my power, please ask for it."

"I'll remember that."

"One more thing—I hope you and your family will come to my coronation. As part of the nobility, your parents should witness it; and as your friend, it would mean a lot to me if you were there to see it."

_Your friend_. That was it, then, the confirmation—not that she had really needed it, but she had wondered, for a moment, when the summons arrived, if he still wanted something more from her than friendship or alliance. Mai nodded, though, wished him luck, and left.

When she turned the corner at the end of the hallway, she saw another girl, dressed in the same blue shades as Sokka, apparently heading toward the conference room. "Katara?"

She stopped short. "Mai." The two stared at each other for a moment. Then Katara cleared her throat. "How are you?"

"All right. I just talked to Zuko; he asked—"

Katara nodded. "He told me about that."

Mai looked hard at her. "Are you and Zuko …"

"Dating? Yes." Katara was not ashamed to say it, but she felt awkward admitting it to her boyfriend's ex-girlfriend.

"Huh. I guess I'm not surprised."

"You're not?"

"He told me about you. From the way he talked about you, I could tell you still had his heart."

Katara did not know how to respond. Then Mai said, "Be good to him."

"I will," Katara promised. "And, Mai … I hope you find someone who makes you as happy as Zuko makes me."

Mai blinked at her; then the turned away, pressing a hand to her face. Katara wondered if she was about to cry—did she still care that much about Zuko? But then she heard something that could have been a sob, but she realized it was actually a giggle.

"What?" Katara demanded.

Mai lowered her hand, her smile sardonic. "You're so sweet. I don't know how Zuko can stand you." Katara blinked, affronted. Mai shook her head, still smiling. "Well … if you forgive me for attacking and capturing you, I guess I can forgive you for kidnapping my brother, and dating Zuko."

Katara managed a polite smile. "Thank you," she said, and her gratitude was sincere. "I hope you'll be an ally to us, Mai. There's a lot of work to do—a whole world to be rebuilt—and I'd rather have you on our side."

Mai turned to leave, speaking over her shoulder. "I'll see what I can do."

It was not an easy interaction, but Katara still felt hopeful. It was a start, at least.

* * *

><p>Katara and Suki explored the servants' quarters and stores of supplies, and found materials for sewing. They were able to make Aang a formal outfit, resembling those of the old monks, and alter some of Ozai's formal robes to fit Zuko.<p>

On the day of his coronation, the prince felt a little uneasy, wearing his father's clothes, but they would have to do for now. Later he might have new ones made for himself, so he wouldn't feel as though he was stepping into his father's skin.

Same clothes, different man.

"Are you ready?" Katara asked after she helped him dress.

"I am." Zuko paused, a little wistful. "I only wish Uncle were here to see this."

"Well, imagine the look he'll on his face when he sees you wearing the Fire Lord's crown. He's going to be so happy and proud of you." She touched his scarred cheek, becoming serious. "I know I am."

Both of them were still in awe—of each other, and of being alive, which they were because of each other. Where before they had felt admiration, they now felt adoration.

"Will you do me a favor?" Zuko asked.

"Anything."

"After they crown me Fire Lord, I'm going to the prison to see my father. Will you cover for me?"

"I'll do my best." She kissed him quickly before leaving to find her friends and family in the assembly.

Zuko found Aang meditating in front of the curtain they were to pass through to enter the ceremony. The boy was dressed in yellow robes, not his old novice uniform but the formal robes of a master.

"I can't believe a year ago, my only purpose in life was hunting you down. And now …"

Aang smiled up at him. "And now we're friends." It had been months since he first suggested that that was possible for them, and he was satisfied that his hope had not been misplaced.

"Yeah. We are friends."

Aang stood up. "I can't believe a year ago I was frozen in a block of ice." So much had changed during his hibernation. "The world's so different now."

"And it's going to be even more different," Zuko promised, putting a hand on his shoulder. "We'll rebuild it together." They hugged, briefly but warmly, and then went through the curtain together.

Zuko stepped out of the palace first, as one of the Sages rang a gong. He immediately spotted Katara, standing with Hakoda, Sokka, and Suki in front of the crowd. She was smiling, with more peace and pride than Zuko had ever seen in her before.

Everyone cheered when Zuko stepped outside, but he held up a hand, signaling that they should stop. "Please. The real hero," he said, stepping aside and gesturing to Aang, "is the Avatar."

"Put me down so I can see!" Toph said to The Hippo, who had lifted her onto his shoulder. When her feet hit the ground, she could make out Aang standing with Zuko and the Fire Sages.

Katara took Toph's hand in her own. They were feeling the same surge of pride as the boys they loved announced the news that the world had waited a century to hear. "I'm so happy, I feel like I might burst," Katara said.

"Today, this war is finally over."

Everyone cheered, with joyous enthusiasm they had been saving for years, just for this day. The assembly was not limited to citizens or troops expected to applaud their Fire Lord. These were the prince's former enemies, his friends and allies, people who genuinely supported him and believed in him.

"I promised my uncle that I would restore the honor of the Fire Nation, and I will," Zuko vowed. "The road ahead of us is challenging. A hundred years of fighting has left the world scarred and divided. But with the Avatar's help, we can get it back on the right path, and begin a new era of love and peace."

Katara wiped away her tears in time to see Zuko kneel down and the Sages surround him. One stood behind him, and inserted the flame-shaped diadem into his top-knot. "All hail Fire Lord Zuko!" The new Fire Lord stood, for a moment looking stern and regal; but then he looked back at Aang, smiling and gesturing for him to come forward and stand by his side.

There was no feast or festival, but everyone was in a celebratory mood. All the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribe people wanted to congratulate Zuko, and all the Fire Nation citizens and nobility felt obligated to do so. This meant he had to stay in the plaza for almost two hours before he was able to slip away, alone, and walk to the prison.

It felt like visiting his uncle. Now, though, the guards did not question his identity or business. They let him enter the cell.

Ozai's words were sarcastic, though his voice held only contempt. "I should count myself lucky. The new Fire Lord has graced me with his presence in my lonely prison cell."

"You should consider yourself lucky that the Avatar spared your life."

"Hmph."

"Banishing me was the best thing you could have done for my life. It put me on the right path. Perhaps your time here can do the same for you." Aang seemed to believe that no one was beyond redemption. He may have had a point, since he had been right about Zuko in that regard.

Ozai' eyes shifted to and away from him. "Why are you really here?"

"Because you're going to tell me something." He bent down slightly, bringing his line of vision closer to Ozai's level. Where is my mother?"

He was silent for a moment. Zuko waited, but when Ozai spoke, it was with a sneer in his voice. "You ought to bring me some tea, Zuko. We'll talk while sipping from steaming little cups, much like you did with my traitorous brother. I'll give you advice on how to be a good Fire Lord. Wouldn't that be nice?" He seemed to savor seeing Zuko become incensed. "Perhaps even the subject of your mother will come up."

It was pointless, Zuko saw. Rather than giving Ozai the satisfaction of seeing him made so angry, he simply turned to leave. "I don't need this."

"You think being Fire Lord is easy?" Ozai's sharp words made Zuko stop short. Ozai sensed his advantaged and went on, almost gleefully, "The throne comes with many pressures, and those pressures will change you! But if you can stand the heat, you'll become something _more_. Of all the people in the world, I have the wisdom you need, the wisdom of experience! Be honest with yourself, Zuko—do you really believe you can handle it all on your own?"

Zuko walked out the door, but as the guards closed it Ozai said, "You'll be back. And I'll be here waiting for you. _Son._"

Zuko berated himself on the walk back to the palace, half for making this trip in the first place, and half for paying Ozai's words any heed. Why had he gone right away, and ruined the hopeful mood? He had felt so confident this morning, and now he was doubting himself.

_"Do you really belief you can handle it all on your own?"_

_I won't be alone—_he thought of Aang, who he had agreed to rebuild the world with, and Katara, who had said that she would stay with him. The fact remained, though, that they did not have any definite plans that he knew of, besides finding and reinstating the Earth King. Once they did that, they would have to help mend the damage that the war had caused. These were vague, general goals that they needed to discuss and define together.

When he reached the palace, the elderly twins greeted him at the gate. "Someone is waiting to see you," Lo informed him.

"The Water Tribe chief," Li specified.

"Hakoda?" Zuko remembered seeing him in the crowd.

Zuko found Hakoda waiting in the throne room, a far less intimidating environment without the flames that usually flanked the Fire Lord's seat. Hakoda stood when Zuko entered, and bowed his head politely. "Fire Lord."

It felt strange, being addressed formally by an older, more experienced leader. Zuko tried to match his tone. "Chief Hakoda. I hope you haven't been waiting long."

"I know we saw each other earlier today, but I wanted a chance to talk to you."

"What can I do for you?"

"I wanted to offer my congratulations, and my thanks."

"Er—thanks?"

"My daughter told me what you did during Sozin's Comet."

Zuko looked at him apprehensively, not sure how to respond.

Hakoda bowed his head slightly. "Thank you for saving Katara."

"Oh—you're welcome." Zuko shifted his weigh uncomfortably. "Er … did Katara tell you anything else?"

"As a matter of fact, she did."

"Like what?" Zuko had a bad feeling in his stomach as they approached the topic.

"Like how you kept Katara prisoner, protected her from another Fire Nation officer, fell in love with her, and helped Sokka rescue her and Aang. How more recently you helped Katara find the man who killed her mother, my wife."

Zuko felt a blush creeping on his neck and face. Why couldn't his hair be down so he could hide his face behind a curtain of bangs? Not knowing where else to look, Zuko fixed his eyes on the floor.

Then he felt a hand on his shoulder, looked up, and saw Hakoda smiling at him. "Add to that the fact that you rescued me from the Boiling Rock, and risked your own life to save Katara—I couldn't be more indebted to you. So, if there's ever anything you want to ask of me, just let me know."

Zuko opened his mouth but found himself at a loss for words. Was Hakoda speaking in political terms, as an ally? Or did he mean—could that have been his way of giving his blessing, or hinting that he would do so someday, if …

"Wait. Are you going back to the Water Tribe?"

"Yes."

"Are Sokka and Katara going with you?"

"Not today. They said they want to stay longer, to help you and Aang."

"I told them all that they're welcome to stay here, for as long as they want or need. But we haven't talked about … well, Katara hasn't told me what she wants to do next, after things settle down. If you don't want her to be with me, I understand."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"I … maybe she didn't tell you this part. During Sozin's Comet … she got hurt because of me."

Hakoda raised an eyebrow at him. "The way she told it, she's alive because of you," he said, his tone remarkably neutral.

"I saved her, but she shouldn't have been hurt in the first place. I was the one who asked her to come with me. I put her in danger, and then I wasn't able to protect her."

Hakoda folded his arms. "Then what makes you think you can rule a nation?" Zuko was taken aback, and Hakoda went on, "If you couldn't protect one person, how are you going to protect your people?"

Zuko was shocked, and more than a little flustered. "I … I don't …"

Hakoda shook his head, looking apologetic. "I didn't mean that literally, Zuko. It's the same question I asked myself, six years ago." Zuko's mouth dropped open; he had actually forgotten who he was talking to, what this man had been through. Hakoda avoided studied the floor, remembering, reflecting. "I had better reason to. My wife—her name was Kya—she died because I wasn't there to protect her." He raised his eyes to look at Zuko. "But you were there for Katara, and you were able to save her. If anything, you'll probably be a better partner than I was."

Zuko couldn't have been more surprised. "I … don't know what to say … except, well, thank you. And … I hope your confidence isn't misplaced."

Hakoda smiled again, and unfolded his arms to offer his hand. "Good luck, son."

Zuko shook his hand. "You too."

* * *

><p>He found his friends hanging out in the palace gardens. Aang was most excited by the pond. "Hey Toph, have you ever seen turtle-ducks before?"<p>

"No. In fact I've never seen anything," Toph reminded him.

Aang rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean. Have you ever _encountered_ one?"

"Can't say that I have."

"My mom and I used to feed them together." They turned and saw Zuko approaching. He knelt down, though he was still in his formal robes, and handed Toph a piece of bread. "Try giving them pieces of this." He left the preteens at the edge of the pond, and joined Katara under a tree nearby. "Hey."

"Hey. How did it go?"

"Dad wasn't very cooperative. I guess I'll have to start from scratch and send out search parties."

"I bet June will find her, if we can get her a good smell sample."

Zuko changed the subject. "Your dad came to see me."

"Really? Why?"

"He thanked me for saving you, and congratulated me on my coronation."

"OW!" Toph yelped, drawing their attention to her. "What the heck?"

"What did you do?" Zuko asked.

"All I did was throw the bread."

"You have to be really gentle," Zuko cautioned. "Let them come to you."

"Listen, and wait," Aang recalled.

Zuko turned back to Katara. "So, you're not going home with him?"

"Well, he told Sokka and me that we can choose where to go next. That's what we've been doing for the past year now."

"So what are you and Sokka planning, after we've reinstated the Earth King and stabilized things more?"

"Sokka wants to visit Kyoshi Island before going home. And … I was _hoping_ I could stay here."

"Permanently," Zuko tried to clarify.

"More or less, yeah."

He looked at her intently, tilting his head slightly. "Do you think you would really feel at home here? It's about as different as you can get from the Water Tribes."

"If you're talking about the weather and environment, I've been away from home for almost a year. I'm used to seasonal climates."

"It's not just that, it's … the whole lifestyle, really. You'd be a guest of the Fire Lord. I guess you're kind of an ambassador of your tribe."

"Zuko?" Aang turned around to look at him. "Is it okay to hold these guys?"

"Um … if they'll let you, sure." Zuko had never had particularly good relations with the turtle-ducks, but after befriending dragons, a snapping mother turtle-duck did not seem quite so threatening anymore.

They watched, momentarily distracted, as Aang managed to scoop up a turtle-duckling he had been feeding. "Hold out your hands," he said. "Be firm so he doesn't crawl away, but gentle so you don't hurt him."

For once, Toph did as she was told, letting Aang mold her hands around the turtle-duckling. She laughed a little, feeling the downy texture of the feathers and the hardness of the shell. "Weird. They're like equal opposites, all in one animal."

Zuko smiled. When Katara started talking to him, it pulled him away from the sweet moment. "Do you remember when you left the North Pole, and you asked me to come with you?" Zuko nodded, and she explained, "I stayed with Aang because you didn't have a purpose, and he did. I taught him waterbending and helped him prepare to face the Fire Lord. Now the two of you have a common purpose, to help rebalance the world. So I could help either one of you, and still be working toward the same end. Aang will have Toph and probably Sokka by his side. But since Iroh's going to live in Ba Sing Se, you won't have anyone, unless I stay."

"I appreciate that, but … it doesn't seem fair to you. I don't want you to sacrifice your happiness for me."

"You _are_ my happiness."

"That doesn't mean your family and friends aren't as well."

"Well, what's _your_ happiness, Zuko? I mean, Fire Lord?" She peered at him as a new thought occurred to her. "Do you not want me around?"

"Don't be ludicrous; you know I do! I just don't know if what I want is what's best for you." That had been part of their original struggle, the conflict between their own desires and the other's needs.

"If I left, I might get over missing you, but I couldn't be happy knowing that you were alone here."

Zuko gave up then. He could see that her mind was made up, and what she wanted was the same thing he wanted anyway. He pressed his lips to her forehead in a gentle kiss. "You are, without a doubt, the most selfless and loving person I know. Thank you."

"We better go, Aang," Toph said, releasing the turtle-duckling back into the pond. "These lovebirds need their privacy."

Aang glanced over his shoulder at Katara and Zuko, and then at Toph as she stood and walked away. "Wait—are you talking about them or us?" He airbent himself to his feet, chasing after his sort-of girlfriend, not for the first time.

"You decide!" Toph said, laughing as she ran from him. Even though they had kissed, and more or less professed mutual love, she thought it would be more fun to draw out the chase a bit.

* * *

><p><strong>Music:<strong> "Peace" by Jeremy Zuckerman

**Artwork:** "Zutara at the end" by Kuro-Akumako

**Author's Note:** It's funny how timing works: I'm posting this chapter, about _Avatar: The Last Airbender_'s finale, just days after _The Legend of Korra_'s finale. Both end with a theme of peace, which frankly is something the world needs now, especially at this time of year. 2014 has had too many tragedies-Michael Brown, Robin Williams, the Israel-Palestine warfare, ebola, kidnapped girls in Nigeria, missing students in Mexico, the Taliban massacre on a school, and now the deaths of two New York police officers. Let's all pray for peace on Earth in 2015.

This chapter was hard to write, with so many ideas and so much vagueness about the order of events. I'd like to dedicate this chapter to you readers who were worried that my last chapter was the end. Rest assured, I have plenty more material for this story! My only uncertainty is how to present it. I am now at the same kind of point where I was between the Book 1 arc and the Books 2 and 3 arc (I see those as the two halves of the story, as it stands now). Now I appeal again to you readers: should I post the rest as part of this story, or should I make it a different volume, like a sequel? If I did that, then the post-war part of the story could be read on its own by anyone who wanted the series to end with Zutara but hasn't read "Finding What You Weren't Looking For".

A word on my upcoming work: Now that _The Legend of Korra_ no longer has new episodes coming out, I'm going to begin posting a _Legend of Korra_ story that, like this one, would be in the same world but put the characters in different situations than those in the show. I've been going over it in my head the same way I used to go over scenes for this story, when I was in the thick of writing it. I don't know how the second half will go, but I have the first half mostly written out and I think if I start posting it I'll be able to figure out later details along the way, like I did for FWYWLF. I'm really excited about starting this new story and I hope you will read and review it!


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